Reading Reviews for The Fires Within
705 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Anonymous Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

14th December 2014:
So confusing, good story but I have to say I did not quite

Author's Response: I can sympathize - a lot of things went wrong with the plot because I was caught between keeping the story canon and following through with my original idea, and in the end, I went with the first (bad, bad decision).

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Review #2, by qdydhy Prologue : Broken Vow

2nd May 2013:
Hi, Violet Gryfindor. This is the only way I can find to contact you.

I'm a huge fan of Snape and I like The Fires Within very much. This is definitely the best SnapeOC fanfic I've ever read.

So I will be really thrilled if I can have your permission to translate it into Chinese.

I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Have a nice day! :)

Author's Response: Hi there! :) Yes, if you're willing to translate it, you certainly may. I'd love to have a link to it afterwards!

Thank you for the compliments! I'm very pleased to hear that you enjoyed the story so much. :D

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Review #3, by Potter head517 Prologue : Broken Vow

9th January 2013:
Excellent prologue, does not explain too much of the book itself and leaves you with amazing suspense hanging above you.

Author's Response: Thank you very much!

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Review #4, by Gryffindor Seeker 4 Twenty-Five: Against All Odds

19th September 2012:
I was really liking this story until those last two paragraphs. Why'd ya have to do that to the poor girl. I'm considering not reading anymore, just so I can pretend that she successfully fought off He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named with the power of her love for Severus. Then they go on to fight the growing evil with every once of strength they have, defeat it, and live happily ever after with their cute, little baby.
But my curiosity will probably get the better of me.

Author's Response: I entirely agree with you! For some utterly insane reason, I tried to make this story fit into canon (in the aftermath of DH's "Prince's Tale") and it was the worst decision. Now you've got me imagining what could have been. It's hard to say whether Snape ever would be the sort to have a happy ending, but I do like the idea of he and Emilia at least trying to make it work. They deserve better than what the ending of this story gave them. :'(

It's great to hear that you've enjoyed the story up to this point! Thank you very much for taking the time to read and review!

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Review #5, by AAC Four: Speed of Sound

27th July 2012:
Interesting chapter . . . .

Author's Response: Thank you? Most of the time, I don't know why people still read this story - it's old and messy. This chapter is pretty run-of-the-mill when it comes to old fashioned Marauder era stories, so I hardly know what's interesting about it. :P

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Review #6, by Cirque Du Freak Prologue : Broken Vow

4th July 2012:
Okay so this has been on 699 reviews for a while now and I do't understand why anyone would pass up on taking the next hundred. So I'm here to do it :P

I've actually been meaning to read this for a while now and now that I've finally gotten past the prologue I am most definitely intrigued!
Obviously this was written a long time ago but I'm still picking up on the slight tinge of the same poetic sense that is slow clear in your fics recently. Its not quite the same but you're focusing so clearly on the characters here its almost strange to read! But not in a bad way, more in a fascinating way at how far you've come!

To the story itself I adore the dark/horror genre so it was a surprise and shock that you had Mortimer come in and so easily kill his wife - someone he loved very much - and disfigure his child. Its very chilling the way some people's minds work and I think you've shown that pretty well.

You've given us all the names and yet I still feel so lost to who these people really are and I can't wait to figure that out when I get to move on to future chapters.

At this point all I can really say is well done for having such enticing pieces of writing when they've been written and put to rest so long ago!

Hanzi xxx

Author's Response: You definitely need to get a prize for this! I wasn't sure when it would happen, and I'm still boggling over the fact that this story even has that many reviews in the first place, so seeing it at the big 700 is awe-inspiring (not to mention worth a big squee). Thank you so much for being the one to push this story into the next century of reviews! :D

This is one of those mysterious prologues that gives all yet reveals nothing. There's a lot of foreshadowing in this story, but also a lot of red herrings, so good luck with following the plot. ;)

It's interesting, though, how you note the change in the writing style. This story will definitely show the progression of my style over those first three years I was on HPFF, and I'm curious whether it's clearly divided between the concrete style of the prologue and the more abstract final chapters, or whether it occurs with slow development. I often think about how making the chapter images for this story made me better at graphics, but how much of the same can also be said for the writing? This story was very much a work of practice, trying different things to see what worked and what didn't. I'm thankful to this story for what it's allowed me to do since. :)

Thank you again for reading and reviewing! I really appreciate it!

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Review #7, by loopylunalovegood One: She Will Be Loved

29th April 2012:
I have read only two chapters of this and I am already hooked.Your writing technique is flawless and vocabulary large, The plot-line is nothing but interesting filling me with anticipation and keeping me on the edge of my seat this is truly remarkable in every way. Don't stop writing you could be huge maybe even as big as queen rowling herself.

Author's Response: Thank you very much! It's great to hear that you're already enjoying the story and want to continue - I hope that the rest of the story lives up to your expectations. Wow! I'd love to be as famous a writer as JKR one day - I've got my fingers crossed for it! :D

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Review #8, by harronhermy Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

23rd April 2012:
So, so amazing. You have no idea how much I enjoyed reading this story. It's magnificent, every bit of it. You've even given me a whole new perspective on Snape.

This is one of the best fanfictions that I've ever had the pleasure of reading -- romance, darkness, lust, action, everything had a perfect balance to it. You are a very creative writer and I can't wait to check out your other works. Keep up the good work! xoxo.

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! It means a lot that you've enjoyed this story so much, but it means even more that it's made you see Snape in a new way. I've always found him a really interesting and complex character, and this story allowed me to explore a great many aspects of his personality - it was one of the best things about writing this story for me. :D

Your compliments are overwhelming, and I can do nothing more than thank you for them. They're amazing and have left me speechless. *hugs*

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Review #9, by hp fan:) Prologue : Broken Vow

10th March 2012:
Loving it so far, I can't wait to find out what happens in the rest of the story:D I notice there are lots of stories about Grimm, is there a particular order they're supposed to be read in? Thanks - 10/10 rating!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm glad that you've liked the beginning of this story and I hope that you equally enjoy the rest. :D

The stories might be easiest to read in order of publication, should you choose to read them. The one-shots mostly provide backstory on Grimm and McGonagall's relationship, so they're not necessary for understanding this novel - they're just extra fun. :)

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Review #10, by x3CherryWatermelonx3 One: She Will Be Loved

9th January 2012:
Another wonderful chapter! Can't wait to get to the next one! :)

Author's Response: Thanks again! I hope that you enjoy the rest of the story! :D

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Review #11, by x3CherryWatermelonx3 Prologue : Broken Vow

8th January 2012:
Love this chapter! Cannot wait until I can read the next one!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! :D

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Review #12, by Dee Two: In This Life

3rd January 2012:
Wow, I must say that this story so far is absolutely marvelous!!! Splendid grammar, writing and lovely characters who each have individual and developed personalities! I can't wait to keep reading on (even though it's 4am :O)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! It's only the second chapter and you already like the story this much? I hope that you enjoy the rest too. Your kind words mean a lot. ^_^

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Review #13, by Evanna Adams Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

27th December 2011:
I think this story is... Amazing, for the lack of good words. I thank you as I learnt a lot from your writing.
But I wanted to know... Does true love really hurt this much?

Author's Response: Thank you very much! It means a lot that you were able to take something from this story and learn from the writing - the whole novel shows a lot of how I developed in writing and writing it taught me a lot. ^_^

And yes, it does hurt that much. *hides*

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Review #14, by EmilyChristine Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

10th December 2011:
So, I've been reading this story every spare minute I've had for the past like three days and I finally finished! First of all, simply amazing job on Emma's character. She was the perfect mix of good and yet not perfect. I'm not going to lie, I was shipping her and Sirius pretty hardcore for a while, but in the end I accepted that they didn't end up together haha. I honestly love how true you were to the character qualities in all the cannon characters. I feel like a lot of fan fictions kind of mess them up, but you definitely captured them perfectly :) this was an amazing story and I hope you will never stop writing because you have such an amazing gift. Thanks for writing this lovely story!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! Three days of reading this story - you're a brave one for getting through it all, not to mention so quickly too. I don't know what to say, actually, except to thank you very much for your compliments - they're fabulous and very uplifting (this story always makes me cringe - it fell so far short of how I'd wanted it to go, so these positive reviews for it leave me shocked, but pleased - it's just me, not the story :P).

It's funny that you mentioned shipping Emma with Sirius because that was the original plan - to write one of those love triangles between her, Snape, and Sirius, but I started shifting away from that, first because it could have made the story more cliched, and second because DH forced me to include Lily in the triangle instead. So there was Sirius/Emma slowly developing for a time, and that's probably what you caught onto in the story. It would have made things a lot different. ;)

Thanks again for reading and reviewing! It means a lot that you did enjoy this story. ^_^

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Review #15, by Cassius Alcinder Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

5th December 2011:
Review tag!

So seeing as how I actually read the entire story a couple months ago and neglected to leave reviews, I definetly owe you one:)

First of all, what an original plot! I loved how you managed to create your own very unique OC and seemlessy weave her into the canon information we know about the Marauders. I especially have to commend you for being able to adapt they story when JK threw you a curveball with the whole Prince's tale thing. That obviously interefered with how the story seemed to be going, but you managed to play it off really well. Although it was a bit darker than JK's writing style, I could definetley see this filling in some of the gaps in our canon knowledge, and fitting perfectly into what we know of the era. Although the end was very sad, it definetely had to be that way because you just can't give snape a happy ending and have it fit his character. Most of all, I really enjoyed reading the depcitions of the beginning of the first wizarding war, and how well you captured the confusion and violence of the times.

Characterization was excellent as well. Snape has to be one of the most challenges characters to write as he is so complex and layered, and I think you nailed him perfectly. I also really enjoyed your depiction of the marauders, you showed just enough of their fun loving antics while mostly focusing on the serious back drop of the looming war, something I feel that is missing in most marauder era fics. the OC's were very interesting as well, Grimm was such a great character, and Sejanus was interesting and layered. nd obviously Emma was a very complex MC with a lot of depth to her. I have to say of the many "Lily's best friend OC's," she's the first one I've seen that didn't seem really cliched and wasn't solely there to be paired off with Sirius or Remus.

I think another thing that really made this story were the descriptions of the settings, it really created the aura of mystery around the events. Btw, the chapter with the estate on the moor I was totally thinking about Hound of the Baskervilles, and then you mentioned something about a hound and I thought that was awesome.

Great job on an amazing story!

Author's Response: Many apologies for taking so long to respond - it's a fantastic review and I'm very thankful that you took the time to not only read this very long (and rather pondering) story, but also that you left such a detailed review. I do have a general dislike of this story, so responding to reviews for it is difficult because I often can't understand how anyone could enjoy it. However, having someone of your calibre be complimentary to it makes me second-guess my dislike. It's perfectionism that plagues me and nothing more. ;)

Anyway, first know that your review has left me with a loss of words. Not many people actually mention the characterization of Snape, not that I can remember at least, so hearing that he was well-written in this story is wonderful news - the problem I had was in making him show emotion without actually showing it, if that makes sense. He's the kind of character who is brimming with feeling, but has forced himself to repress it utterly, even to the point that Voldemort can't "see" his "true" feelings, which is very impressive. But it also makes Snape a strange character to write, and maybe that's why many writers have trouble writing him. At times in this story, he feels very distant, while at others, he is anything but, and I worried that it made him too erratic, so to hear the opposite is fabulous.

I'm also very glad to hear that Emma's characterization was successful. She teetered on the edge of Mary Sue for most of this story, mostly because she was my first OC, but also because, like you said, the Lily's friend cliche, or even just a female OC in the Marauder Era cliche threatened disaster. It helped to take the characters out of Hogwarts and let them "grow up" on their own terms - that was where Girmm's death became a turning point for Emma, and for me, she became a more interesting character (for me, at least).

That scene on the moor was heavily inspired by the "Hound of the Baskervilles" - it's one of my favourite Holmes stories because of the atmosphere. The same plot and characters without the moor couldn't be as captivating and terrifying. The moor is a wonderful setting for Voldemort - all doom and gloom, rather like the Riddle Mansion in GoF.

Thank you again for your review! I can't fully express how fantastic it is! :)

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Review #16, by torahosk1 Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

10th November 2011:
I could write a lot about this story, what I liked and disliked, how many feelings I had when I read it ( how pissed off I was when things did not work out for them, how I cried when someone died, how I loved when they were happy and angry when they weren't ) so I'm just going to have it short.
You are an amazing writer, the way you describe the characters and emotions really inspires me so please continue to write. Best of luck and thanks for letting me inside your world, T.

Author's Response: Oh wow! This is a fantastic review to receive! It means a lot that this story was so affecting - that it made you angry and sad and was able to draw you in to such an extent. Thank you very much for taking the time to read this story, and for offering such lovely compliments! :)

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Review #17, by miss_emmz Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

30th August 2011:
this story was amazing!
i started reading it and sat there and read 15 chapters in one go..
then all i could think about at work was what is going to happen next. everything that happened i didnt see coming. this is the best fan fiction that i have ever read! fantastic!

Author's Response: Thank you! Wow! It's fantastic to hear that you enjoyed it and found it so addicting. I wrote it over a number of years, so I often forgot things I'd mentioned in earlier chapters and was constantly editing, so I never really got a feel for the story as a whole, like it would be from a reader's perspective. It means a lot to hear such positive comments, and I'm just speechless that you thought so highly of it. Thank you!

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Review #18, by Atomic Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

11th August 2011:
I have so much to say for your story, and yet I have no idea how to say it. While reading it, I was never really sure how I felt about it. It got completely cannon-shafted by HPB and DH but you tied it in so well even then, and you refused to give a happy ending, because that's not an ending Severus Snape could ever really have. And even though I so desperately wanted it to end happy, I'm glad it didn't.

This is the type of story that will remain with me for a long time. I'm not sure if it's the kind of response you're looking for, but it's honestly the highest compliment I can give.

Author's Response: Totally canon-shafted! Haha, I still haven't forgiven JKR for it (as she's done it again with Pottermore and McGonagall, but I won't go there now :P) because it made this story a lot more difficult to write. It was always going to have a sadder ending because I would have had to remove Emma from the scene anyway due to canon, but the introduction of Snape/Lily threw me off course into AU-range. I'm glad to hear that you were able to follow your way through, nonetheless and you even liked the ending! :')

Thank you again for reading and reviewing! Even though I shudder to think about this story most of the time - the weaker parts standing out a little too clearly in my conscience - it's still a wonderful compliment to hear from someone who enjoyed reading it. ^_^

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Review #19, by Atomic Four: Speed of Sound

10th August 2011:
You were right, the beginning of your story was a bit rough to read. But I'm so glad I took your advice and kept reading!! This is turning out to be a brilliant story, and I can't wait to read more. I'm so happy that you worked Andromeda into the story, too. She's also one of my favorite characters.

Author's Response: lol, "a bit" - you're being kind! Much too kind, actually. Sometimes I can't believe that people are still reading this monster, but hopefully you find some sort of enjoyment from it, as there are some parts and characters who turned out well. I enjoy using slightly obscure characters, or at least, they were obscure in fanfiction at the time I wrote them - like Moody and Andromeda. There's so much potential there that's unrealized, even now. ;)

Thank you very much for the review! I hope that you do enjoy the rest, whenever you choose to continue. :)

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Review #20, by Anonomys Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

2nd August 2011:
I loved your story, but I still have no idea what happened in the end, starting with Em finding out she was prego until the end. Could you write a simple summary about it in plain english so I could understand it Better?

Author's Response: lol, it would help if I knew what happened, but even I find it confusing. She apparently goes back to "canon" time (as opposed to the alternate universe where she and Snape were married), and this change makes her go insane, so she goes to an asylum where she has the child and dies around the same time as the Final Battle in DH. That's the most simple way of describing it, though it doesn't cover everything.

Thanks for reading and reviewing! It's great to hear that you enjoyed the story!

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Review #21, by Salem Twenty-Six: Ending of a Story

30th July 2011:
I know this fic is old and later books in the series contradicted certain events you portrayed here, but because I feel this was so masterfully written I really didn't mind any of that so I won't bother nitpicking. Instead I'll just give my thoughts overall.

I have to say, I steered as *clear as possible* of Snape/OC fics before I had a go at reading this, since Snape/Lily is an OTP of mine and I feel the majority writers who pair an OC with Snape just tarnish his character and pure love completely (you did neither of those). But I told myself to give this story a chance since the first chapter so politely requested doubtful readers to give it a try. And the result of that is that now I really, really just adore your deep writing style and how your characters and their interactions are so well developed that they just come to life from the text--ugh! I never get this attached to original characters, but I teared up when Grimm died--and that turned my initial skepticism into great fondness. I read this story *twice* in the span of one week and I still loved it as much the second time.

I also love how you didn't force a relationship between Snape and Emma and that they didn't get a happy, cliched fairytale ending. The bittersweet ending was a much better fit in my honest opinion, since they are both rather tragic characters. And on that note, I'm glad you finished this story and saw it through to the end because if it had been left unfinished I'm not sure I would have been able to adore it as much since it's easier for me to feel attached to completed stories than abandoned or unfinished works since I usually tend to wander away from and lose interest in those types.

I'm sure if I don't stop somewhere I'll end up ranting like a loon about what else I liked, so I guess that's the end of this review. I'll definitely be checking out your other works!

Author's Response: To put it simply from my end, the last two books threw very large wrenches into my plots and characterizations and made finishing this story very, very difficult (because I'm a stickler for canon unless one is writing explicitly AU material). I should have finished writing before HBP came out, but instead I slow down and get further put off by DH's revelations. *sigh*

As soon as I read DH, I leapt onto the good ship Snilly once and for all, so I can understand your trepidation regarding Snape/OC. I miss the innocent days of Snape/OC stories, but I can't read them anymore, unless one came out that cleverly and plausibly fit into canon.

Anyway, I'm stunned by this review. To be honest, until I received this review, I despised this story with every ounce of my creative being - so many things went wrong with it and it's far from the ideal I kept dreaming it would be. But after I read your thoughts, I went back and read through the ending chapters (and my favourite earlier chapters with Grimm and Minerva - that part of the story, at least, was a success), and I can see what you mean. There is depth and character sympathy and the writing's better than I thought it was (can I say that?) - those chapters with Snape and Emma may be ridiculously plotted, but the feeling there is strong, and that's what counts. Thank you for shoving me back into this story - it's always good to go back to one's roots and to see that they're not as rotten as one imagines them to be. I hated this story for so long, but looking back, I don't quite know why.

Thank you for reading and reviewing this story. It means a lot to hear these things from someone, especially one who enjoyed the story, and took the time to read it multiple times - that's got to mean something, and I appreciate it. There's no better compliment you could have paid. ^_^

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Review #22, by Mintleaf Three: Somewhere Only We Know

20th April 2011:
Hmmm, the bit just after Emma and Tiberius meet up with Dolores seems rather awkward to me. I think Tiberius perhaps broke character a little too much!

Ah little Remus! :) :) :)

Oh my, I'm ever so curious about who this cloaked figure is.

An excellent chapter again!

Author's Response: Haha, rather too much of my personal dislike for Umbridge was poking through there. Even though Grimm does have issues with her, rather serious ones to boot, he would know better than to break his character at such a point. ;) I'm glad that you like the young Remus, though - he's so cute to write as a child!

Thank you for reading and reviewing this story, though I still wonder why you're doing it. :P I really only keep this story around because so many people reviewed and favourited it - I never expect that anyone new would want to read it, it's so flawed! :S

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Review #23, by Mintleaf Two: In This Life

20th April 2011:
Oh wow, you write the perfect Dumbledore! I'm both shocked and thrilled to read such a pleasant interpretation of him! And having a school rival of McGonagall's is wonderful! I imagine she'd be a bit like Hermione at school, and would thus need someone to compete with! :)

Tiberius and Emma's relationship is just adorable! I really love it :)

"Professor Grimm meant to keep your presence here a secret, so naturally, everyone knows about it." - Haha, this line seems familiar :)

Your story is so endearing and so intriguing! I'm enjoying it thoroughly so far! :D

Author's Response: Thank you very much! I'm very proud of my writing of Dumbledore, and it's fantastic that you like it! He's a very dynamic character, endlessly fascinating in his complexities, especially when you take his past into account. McGonagall has a lot to her as well, and I love to explore/create a history for her. :)

It's a lovely compliment that you're enjoying this story!

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Review #24, by Mintleaf One: She Will Be Loved

17th April 2011:
There is one particular line I simply adore in this, "Fulvia entered the room like a ship coming into port" - it's such a wonderful description!

This is shaping into such a lovely, charming story! You've set it up so well, and I find myself wanting to keep reading till I find out what happened to her Father! Whether/when he comes back to find her!

Great work :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you very much! It's great to hear that the story is shaping up well so far. I rather enjoyed writing Fulvia and her sister (too much, actually, they're so wonderfully hateful). Mort will return eventually, so keep looking for him. ;)

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Review #25, by Mintleaf Prologue : Broken Vow

16th April 2011:
Hmm so I see what you meant by the writing being a little slow, but I hardly think it's much of a deterrent at all as the plot is so fascinating :) I was ever so frightened for little baby Emma when Mortimer cast that spell on her (well before we knew what the curse was). I do however think it's unbelievable OOC for Moody to have justified Mort's killing in any way. Especially seeing as he was clearly a fan of purebloodedness, Moody probably would have been suspicious of him already. When you first described Lyra I thought she was going to be a young McGonagall, haha!

Anyway, this was an interesting prologue! :)

Author's Response: Thank you for the kind words! It's always a shocker when people come in to read and review this story, but it's great to hear that you've enjoyed the first chapter and felt for the characters.

My writing of Moody here is suspect, and I can only blame the age of this story and its author for that. I figured out how to write him better in my later stories. ;)

If you do continue, I hope you enjoy what you find. :)

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