Oh. My. Gosh. That is the saddest thing I have ever read! You did a good job. Report Review
this i think is the first fanfiction that has really made me cry so far
i just can't stop the tears coming
this is beautifull...it's soo moving
keep on writting
*hugs & tears* Report Review
*despartly reaches for the tissue box*
This was aboustly amazing, and extremely sad. It's hard to convey sadness or anything that really makes the reader's heart kinda break in a sense. You have potrayed it and I give you plenty of cookies for doing it. Aboustly amazing. And diffently a favorite. Report Review
Great! Your description is wonderful. I can't wait to read more of your work. ;) Report Review
That was such a good story. Wonderful, but sooo sad! Awesome writing style! Great attention to detail and very descriptive words. 10/10 Report Review
Very well written, moving, sad, and powerful. Well done. Report Review
Hello. :) You're right; this is very depressing. Haha. You killed everyone of them?! Anyway, I thought it was written beautifully. :) The emotions and tje descriptions were awesome. Report Review
You killed them ALL? Every single one? Report Review
That was beautiful- so tragic! I want you to know it is on my favs! Report Review
Okay, i know these stories work much better as oneshots. It's incontevertible.
But, perhaps a sequel? Just the heaven meeting... reuniting in heaven. Everyone there. Remus like, "Hermione, you brave girl." fluffy... i know that would destroy the whole tragic-ending of this story, but i know i would enjoy it ^^ Once again, well done. This really made me bawl. 10/10 Report Review
I read a version of this on fanfiction.com :D
it's so sad. i was crying ;( i love these types of stories. You have a great talent - none of your stories are cliched, and you have the proper english/vocabulary/comprehension/punctuation unlike some nooby authors on this site. well done, 10/10 Report Review
Amazing!!! I can't wait to read some more of your work!Author's Response: Thank you very much! Report Review
this story is amazing, u had me in tears all the way through, i hope ur happy now lol my keyboard is totally soaked,
a bit depressing i've gotta say but very well written, i listened to the song while reading the fic and they went together well, i beta read something 2 chear me up now,
but like i said it's an awespme story :) Report Review
Oh, that was so sad. But I can see Hermione doing just how you wrote this. You wrote this very well. I hope you have more stories, maybe not so sad, that I can read. Report Review
that is so sad!!! 10/10 all the way!!! Report Review
that was a beautiful story well written and very touching i loved it Report Review
*sniff* ahaha *breaks down crying* that is so sad. its breaking my heart. why did thye have to die. i love it Report Review
amazing, moving, absolutely breathtaking story. One of the best I've ever read. I love the way you described everything so perfectly... especially the way Hermione died with the wand rolling. Everything you wrote just seemed to flow and nothing seemed out of place at all. You have amazing talent! i loved it!Author's Response: Thank you so much :) I'm really glad you liked it, and found it so moving :) Thank you for reading. Report Review
Wow. wow *shrug* Wow. Heh.
Well, truly an amazing 2nd Chapter. Simply superb, top-notch, excellent, incredible. I love it.
-I forgot to mention in the first review, but it'll work here. I love that it's Hermione and Lupin left. Not Hr. and H, nor Hr. and Ron. Hermione and Lupin. There's something about those two. I really enjoy them as characters. The perfect two characters for this...
-The paragraph with Hr. kissing Ron... Wow. I almost cried, it was so perfect. I don't really cry when I read stories, especially not when I'm in a computer lab. (o: But you almost had me..!
-"It should have been you, she thought longingly, and with sadness so deep it cut into her stomach like a knife blade. I should have been dancing with you." Aww this line was so pitiful and sad. It almost really did make me cry, I felt them that time! But I fought 'em off. (o; Amazing lines.
-"As his face disappeared forever beneath the cloak, Hermione felt a part of her die." *heavy sigh and release of breath* Wow. I'm running out of anything better to say than 'wow.' I can just feel your stories. Sometimes it's hard for me to review stories because I don't feel anything, it's just writing. But yours - I feel it. Boy do I.
-"In that moment, it seemed necessary to see him; to be a witness, and to honour this boy who had been such a hero to her, and one of her dearest friends. More than that, she needed to see him completely, before she closed her eyes on his face forever." You have the best lines ever. Wow. I like this. She had to be a witness to it. Of course, that perhaps only lasted a short time... *sigh* So sad and depressing...
-"finding it suddenly to* hard to look" I think the first 'to' should be 'too.'
-"With grief and sick anger like bile in her mouth, she unfastened the clasp of her own cloak, and spread it tenderly over him, pulling it up to his chest and shoulders." I found it interesting that she uses her own cloak to cover Harry but she used Ron's cloak for Ron. Just interesting. Any reason for this?
-"the black material sinking into the planes of his face with an almost audible sigh, as if even it, too understood the immense sadness of the act" Wow, beautiful; the cloak even knows... These are the kind of details that place a story so far above the rest. There are stories. Then there are good stories and great stories. Then... there are those select few that are simply... impossible to properly label or describe..!
-"A cold chill washed over her, ra*sing the hair on her arms," I think the word should be 'raising' maybe?
-Lupin coughing blood - that was digusting and real. (Don't get me wrong, I liked it.) Then Hermione wiping it away - sublime.
-""I'll be alright,” Lupin said softly, though it was plainly a lie. He was dying, and Hermione knew it. Her soul withered in horror at the thought of it." Again, amazing. Do you even know how amazing? Amazing. Iy was plainly a lie, of course. Of course. Her soul withering in horror, ah... wow.
-"and tried to ignore the though* that Lupin was dying in her arms," I think it should be 'thought'.
-"she realised she might have had a chance to live, if she had gone as Lupin had instructed… but to live for what?" Yes, this is the question. *The* question.
-I like how you shifted to "The girl" in the end. Yep, I caught it. (o: Suddenly we could no longer be seeing from Hermione's eyes.
How terribly terrible! How depressingly depressing! How excruciatingly painful. Did you say that you *didn't* win for the "Worst Day Ever"? This story was simply awesome. Again, a 10/10 on my scale, the 2nd Full Mark for me to ever give out. (o:Author's Response: Oh, my gosh, you're so kind... thank you, again (I know you might be getting sick of that by now!)... you're such a generous reviewer. I can't tell you how happy your comments made me. :)
I don't know why I decided that it should be Hermione and Remus left. I have always loved those two. They have similar personalities, and there is just a wonderful dynamic between them that I adore. I'm really, exceptionally glad that you picked up on that, and not just the fact that I killed everyone :) It wasn't about people dying, it was about those who were left behind. the choices they would make.
I'm glad you almost cried. lol. I probably shouldn't be, that sounds rather cruel. But I love it when something I write can strike an emotional chord within the reader. About her own cloak to cover Harry and Ron's for himself, well I can't believe you even noticed that! I'm really glad you did, though, because to be honest I had no intention behind writing it that way, it just turned out like that. I'd love to give you some meaningful reason for it :) Maybe it was because, unconsciously, Hermione was acknowledging Harry's sacrifice as their leader -- as their hero. And she gave him her own cloak as a kind of offering.
There's a few mistakes in there. Thanks for pointing them out :) I should go back and fix this one up a little, it's been so long since I posted it that I'd forgotten about them. But, once again, I must thank you for making me feel absolutely wonderful with your kind words. You are the best kind of reader, you notice things that I don't even know are there. It means so much when people take some time out of their day to write such honest and heartfelt things. :) Report Review
Wow. I'm officially adding you to my "Favorite Author's" list. You're the 2nd ever. (o:
This was amazing, and I've just got to go on to the next chapter, but of course I want to leave you my thoughts! Your writing is so amazing. I just love it. Such wonderful descriptions, such heart-wrenching sadness, such reality, such terribleness. Truly I think I like these better than happily-ever-after. And I think I like these that aren't built around Romance... Anyway...
-"Then she realised that it was Ginny Weasley. Her dead eyes were staring past Hermione, her face frozen in an expression of shock." Wow. This was so sudden and abrupt that it just shocked me. Immediately the horror hit me. I was just reading along and this line just threw me into the Atrium - into images in my mind of this place, the bodies, the dust, the smell or feel of death. Wow, awesome.
-Oh, then Hermione's finding the dead bodies. Ginny, Ron, and Dumbledore. Terrible, I suppose I'm a bit desensitized to Dumbledore, because of HPB, but then Harry is dead - wow. The terribleness of it all... The seriousness of it hit me. Harry - dead. This is like whosh a heavy weight just landed on me. Poor Hermione dear.
-"He looked beautiful in death" Great line. Just great.
-"Still crying, she collapsed ungracefully by his side. A sharp-edged stone bit into her knee, drawing blood. She didn’t feel it." I like the details in these lines. The 'ungracefully' and the stone in her knee that she didn't feel. Such great touches that I'd probably be careless to leave out.
-Oh, then Lupin. There's something about Lupin being obviously upset and crying.. The seriousness again hits you. He's Lupin, he always has everything together, especially for the kids. To me he's just a strong point, besides Dumbledore, he's next. To see him so obviously in trouble, and to see him crying. Wow, I imagine Hermione would feel the worst ever. Hopeless. Devestated. Nothing left. Wow.
-"Lupin might be dead before the *death Eaters came" I think you'd want Death Eaters capitalized. (o:
-"She saw him then very clearly, and realised he was just as vulnerable, scared and hurt as she was." Ah, again just a great line, realizing the human-ness of our mentors, who we think are always so strong and untouchable. Good.
Well, this was amazing. I'm off to read the 2nd Chapter and then add you to my faves. (o: I'm in love with your writing!
And, this is my first 10/10 to give to anyone. *shrug* I'm not sure how Ratings matter, or how you find them, but nonetheless, just thought you should know. (o:Author's Response: Oh goodness, thank you :) I don't know what to say!
This was an extremely emotional fic to write. I wanted it to be like a Shakespearean tragedy; everyone ends up lying dead on the stage when the final act is over. And most of all, I wanted to see how dark I could get, where I could take Hermione, and to see what she would do in her final moments :)
Your comments are so wonderful. Thank you, again, for reading. :) Report Review
Omg!! That is sooo sad! But at least she didn't have to live her life with no happiness at all. Good writing about a sad thing. Report Review
okay, so it was very good writing, but why would you want to write such a sad and depressing story??
But anyways it was good. Report Review
Immensely sad but very well done. Nice job. Report Review
This is good, but why didn't Hermione try to go for a healer? Report Review
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