Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.






Reading Reviews for Wedding Plans
  
3 Reviews Found

Review #1, by celticbard Wedding Plans

9th August 2016:
Hello ImaRavenclaw,
I'm here from HPFT's review tag. It's so ironic that I picked this story of yours to read, since I'm also writing a story about Hermione having doubts about Ron on her wedding day. Quite a coincidence, isn't it? Therefore, I was really eager to read your story and see how you handled the subject matter.

I definitely loved the fact that Hermione went on a quest of self-discovery, by questioning her family and friends and not questioning just herself, which she probably should have done in the first place. To me, this shows a Hermione out of sorts, not OOC, just at her wit's end. She's reacting to a situation she doesn't understand and I think you did an excellent job portraying her confusion. Like any intellectual, she spends her time looking for a good solid, objective opinion. And while I can certainly see why she went to speak with Harry, I have to admit, I'm a bit flummoxed as to some of the other candidates she chose. For example. I think a young woman would speak to her parents over Dean and Seamus. Also, I thought the denouement (Hermione discussing her cold feet with Ron) was a little rushed. Although I know this story is about self-discovery, Hermione didn't really question herself in the end, but rather, relied on Ron to make the decision for her.

Otherwise, despite these nitpicks, I really liked your story, ImaRavenclaw and I'm glad I had the chance to read it. Thanks for posting! You did a lovely job. :)

Best,
celticbard (aka Khaleesi).

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reading!

Yeah that is pretty ironic, I'm glad you found this then. That's awesome, I'm sure it'll be great!

That was really what I was aiming for. SELF DISCOVERY! Well, Hermione can't exactly talk to her parents because as far as they're concerned, they don't have a daughter! They were obliviated before Hermione went to fight the war.

This was written for an amazing banner on TDA, so everything was kind of rushed, so sorry about that. This is definitely not one of my best works!

Thank you so much for reading, I hope you have an awesome day!

-ImaRavenclaw


 Report Review

Review #2, by toomanycurls Wedding Plans

18th July 2016:
Here from the review tag!

I love weddings and wedding doubts. ^_^ oh boy, thinking she's settling on their wedding day isn't good. *grabs popcorn*

Hermione's assesment of Harry makes sense but this line "even at times interesting" seems like such an insult. Or like Hermione places her own intelligence and views high above Harry's. I like that Luna was able to at least pose probing questions to Hermione, even if they didn't help out too much.

I'm starting to feel sad that no one is able to help Hermione sort through her thoughts and that Molly was too distracted to really pay her much attention. I like the journey this story is on though. As a new-ish parent I can understand that it's hard to give advice with a baby around but I wish they'd been able to offer some help.

Hmm, do you by chance ship Drarry or is Harry's distraction something else?

I am not surprised Dean and Seamus didn't have much help to offer, they don't seem very in tune with relationships.

:( It's disappointing that Arthur would be more caught up with work than his future daughter in law.

Okay, you're definitely shipping Drarry in the background :P

In the end, I'm glad she finally talked with Ron. that's who she really needed to settle with. it's sad that they're settling but at least it's mutual.

I do think a few of the sections would be nice with a few lines of dialogue from Hermione's interactions with the people whose opinions she sought. It would give her interactions more depth and the story more substance.

I am really intrigued by the idea you have here though!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hello Rose!

Thank you for your review.

Okay so... Thanks for pointing that out, I didn't even really notice that's how readers were reading it. I meant it in more of a "oh advice is boring no matter who it's from, even my advice is boring" kind of way.

I wanted Luna in to have that whimsical opinion and the real insight, sometimes you don't get it right away, but it's really helpful!

Really I needed to have everyone be busy, or distracted, or have really bad advice. Because... HERMIONE NEEDS TO FIGURE OUT SHE LOVES RON HERSELF, and that's the main plot point in the story.

My relationship with Drarry is very very hard and long to explain, but I'll give you a quick tidbit: I don't really ship it, but I do. Does that make sense? Basically if it has anything to do with in the books or movies I will straight up REFUSE to ship it, and I also hate edits, and by no means do I ship Daniel Radcliffe and Tom Felton together. Occasionally I read it and I like to include it in my stories because it's good to know how to write about things you hate... That was longer then I expected it to be.

Yeah, I wanted Dean and Seamus to seem like noobs to relationships, even though they have dated a couple of people.

It is disappointing, but like I said, Hermione really needed to find out herself that she was in love with Ron.

This is my first story with no dialogue! I just like to mix up how I write, and try to have my style be really versatile. I'm lacking in era/ship changes right now, but I'm doing good with things like dialogue/no dialogue, 1st person, next story's 3rd person, oh let's add some 2nd person just to be interesting, I'm going to make this whole story dialogue! That type of thing, so I'm sorry you had to read this one.

That is the one thing I had planned from the beginning (I wrote this for a banner in the UFG section at TDA, so I didn't want to waste any time I had to write). Hermione and Ron would talk, and the story would end happily!

Thank you for stopping by and R&Ring this story. I appreciate it! Wherever you are in the world have an awesome day!

-ImaRavenclaw

P.S. Congratulations on being a new mom, I wish you the best of luck!


 Report Review

Review #3, by SilverMoonFairy Wedding Plans

12th July 2016:
Hi! Liz here with a review TAG! *salutes*

So... So...

This story has a very interesting concept behind it and being a Romione story, I was instantly drawn to it! I've never been a fan that JKR said she wished she had put Hermione with Harry, but still, I think every bride has a point in time where she wonders- am I making the right choice? Is this the best path for me? Sorry, I know your story has nothing to do with Harry/Hermione, but that was the first thing I thought of when I started this.

(And don't think I didn't notice the Draco/Harry insinuations. ^_^ Honestly, Hermione, you're supposed to be smart! How did you not see that!)

I found it very interesting to see how all the different people reacted to her news and the advice they gave (when advice was actually given). Sadly, no one really had time to listen to her. You'd think that Mother Hen Weasley would have had some strong opinions on the matter. In the end, though, she did the best thing she could do- TALK TO RON.

So many relationships, both real and fictional, get so messed up because of lack of communication and I'm glad she finally figured out what she needed to do.

A few notes though?

I don't really understand why she went to see Cho, Lockhart, or Malfoy. Especially Lockhart. MOST ESPECIALLY. LOCKHART.

Hermione and Cho were never particularly close to begin with and Cho was really only there as a Harry-arc and outside of the D.A., they really didn't have much interaction. I could see Hermione going to see Cormic McLaggen before she went to see Cho Chang. (And actually, that might have been a bit amusing, especially if he still liked her.) I also don't really understand Cho still crying all the time- I sort of thought she would have moved on by now.

As for Lockhart, I feel like Hermione had a lot of other options. Most notably, she could have paid a visit to Hogwarts and spoken to McGonagall or Slughorn.

Malfoy... Well, as long as things aren't tense, I suppose Malfoy is okay. You sort of need that bit to help solidify all the Draco/Harry clues anyway, haha!

There isn't really any action or conversation at all, which isn't altogether a bad thing, but I sort of thought that when she finally went to talk to Ron, there would be a bit more meat there- like an actual interaction outside of the summary of Hermione's internal monologue. It's not necessarily a bad thing, it just goes for a bit of a slow story.

My final bit is always a list of what I call 'technicals.' They are simply spelling/grammar/awkward phrasing mistakes I find along the way. You can choose to fix them or not, depending on if you meant for them to be that way or not.

"and eventually I was the one given advice."
Should be giving?

"Eventually I glimpsed a water fountain and remembered about something I really wanted. Water. I went over, took a sip, then look around to find Arthur gone."
This section seems very awkward, maybe because of the first sentence. I feel like the 'remembered about something I really wanted' is out of place. Couldn't she simply see the fountain and excuse herself for a drink? This is just a personal preference against the wording- if you like it, you should leave it.

"I couldnít help but wonder if their was something I was missing"
'Their' should be 'There.'


"I had a fast chat with Angelina in hushed tone,"
This should either read 'in a hushed tone' or 'in hushed tones.' Either works!

That is all I have. Overall, I did like it and if you ever do an over-haul or rewrite, I would like to see what you do with it! Have a wonderful day!
-Liz

Author's Response: Thank you for your review tag Liz!

I am going to go in order for all of your review, but before starting I just want to say: I wrote this for an amazing banner I found in the UFG section of TDA, so I wrote it very quickly to make sure I'd have the banner! Hence the grammar mistakes, some people seeming out of place, and the weird flow.

Let's get started!

Thank you for the very long and meaningful review. I don't get those often! I really appreciate it.

Yeah, I've never been a fan of Harry and Hermione either, in the canon aspect. I'm not really a fan of Drarry in canon aspect, but that doesn't mean I don't ship it in fan fiction and otherwise. I ship literally everything possible to be shipped in Harry Potter (except those really strange teacher-student and older-younger ships). Yes, I wanted to reflect that "am I making the right choice?" thought though, that was the main principal of the story.

For this story I mostly went with the flow, and I didn't even toy with the idea of putting Drarry in, I just did because I needed a decent word count. Since it is a one-shot, I didn't want this whole dramatic thing of Hermione figuring it out and telling everyone, or confronting Harry about it. That's a story for another story.

I wanted no one to give her the best advice in the world, because Hermione really needed to figure it out for herself. This is an important moment for her. And I agree, couples need to communicate more!

Like you said with Draco, I need her to go to him because, Drarry. For Cho and Lockhart, the reason I did this was really to portray this huge desperation in Hermione of needing to make the right choice. You're right, I should have done something with Cormic! I actually completely forgot about him.

With Cho crying... I think you're right. I have no idea why she wouldn't have gotten over Cedric. Oh well, writer's moment I guess.

The fact that there is no dialogue in the story is something I'd wanted from the beginning. I like having very versatile works, and if everything is too much the same then I'm like "eh, why do I write anyway?" Some of my fics are in 3rd person, some in 1st, some are all dialogue, some no dialogue, some 2nd person. If no dialogue isn't your thing then so sorry about this story, I think it's my only one up right now without (dialogue).

I am actually kind of sorry you had to read this. This is definitely not one of my better works, and I'm sure if I hadn't wanted the banner it would make a lot more sense and be more interesting and fast paced. Again, so sorry :(

Thank you so much for your tips! Usually I'm spot on with grammar (going to fix that as soon as I'm done replying to you!), and I didn't really look this over. Thank you also for the awkward phrasing, again definitely not one of my best works!

Thank you so much for your review Liz, I love when other writers give me CC feedback and not just what they liked about a story. I appreciated it so much! I hope you have a really awesome day.

-ImaRavenclaw



 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login