5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Dirigible_Plums Chapter 7 - The Sorting Hat

2nd June 2016:

It's Plums here with a review for your entry in the AU Challenge. I actually thought I had already left one until I glanced at my checklist today. My bad :P

Alright, so I really liked this. It was so interesting to see just how the war ending early and Harry's parents surviving shaped him as he grew up. We can see more than a little bit of James in him with throwaway lines here and there such as "Seeing all this effort at smarting up, Harry defiantly ruffled up his hair." But of course, this wasn't the only way that having Lily and James be around affected him - while in the original books, Harry has the pressure of being the Boy Who Lived and the Chosen One, here the pressure is living up to his parents' images as war heroes. It's interesting how this actually secures his place in Slytherin instead of Gryffindor despite their influence - what makes me laugh is that this situation is actually my headcanon for Al Potter and why I have him in Slytherin.

I have to admit that the results of the Sorting were both pleasant and disheartening. I loved to see how the shift in the wizarding world affected everyone, but I just couldn't help but want them all to be together. Every time there was an awkward pause or Harry's thoughts differed from what he had originally thought, I wanted to scream BUT YOU'RE THE GOLDEN TRIO, YOU HAVE TO BE TOGETHER NO MATTER WHAT. The line "Maybe the four of them would become some sort of All-Hogwarts Marauders, poster children for inter-house friendship?" gives me some hope, however. I am accepting this as the future of this AU.

I liked many little aspects of the entire fic - the dynamic between Lily and James, seeing how Neville is both different and yet bizarrely the same, the way the Slytherins are clearly shown as ordinary people - and it is a very strong entry. The fact that the fic itself is similar yet so different from the books is what makes me like it so much. Seeing the extent to which everyone and everything has changed is really interesting.

Thank you for the entry!

Plums xo

Author's Response: Yay, thank you for the review, and for the wonderful challenge, Plums! I'm happy you liked this story!

When I first saw the two prompts you revealed for me for your, the idea hit me with ful force. Yes, both “Lily and James lives” and “Slytherin Harry” were interesting ideas on their own, but when I saw them together I was like “I have to write this!” And I knew I had to write it so that the first things was what made the other happen. And yeah, there's definitely a lot more of James in this Harry than in the canon one - but it's hard to tell how much of it is an act.

I sort Albus Potter in Slytherin too, generally, but the only Al I've written got there because of his huge ambition to be an Unspeakable more than because of trying to get out of his parents' shadows. It's so interesting to see how people sort the next gen kids, and why! And I'm happy it made this story resonate with you in that way, haha!

The idea of having Harry, Ron, Neville and Hermione in all different houses was actually the third thing that came to me when I planned this out, after the two given prompts. And yeah, I definitely think the four of them will become a little inter-house gang - but Hermione will probably prevent them from becoming too much like the marauders, haha! (Also, as Harry being in Slytherin was a given I really couldn't put them all in the same house - at least I can't imagine any of the three others there. Well, Hermione maybe, but Neville or Ron? No.

People keep pointing out how they like the little details in this fic, and I really believe they're the story's heart. It was definitely interesting writing so close - almost uncomfortably close! - to the canon while still being so very AU, and I'm glad you think I pulled it off.

Thanks again for this fun challenge, and good luck with the judging! (From what I have seen you have a difficult job in front of you!)

: )


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Review #2, by PaulaTheProkaryote Chapter 7 - The Sorting Hat

22nd May 2016:
Hi there!

I've always said that the scariest thing about Hogwarts would be the sorting ceremony. First of all, it's a massive decision that will basically determine your next seven years, possibly even as much as the rest of your life! If that wasn't unnerving enough, you're going through the entire process with hundreds of your peers staring you down. That's too much pressure!

Hermione seems to be Lily all over again. I think that will bring Harry some comfort during the stress of transitioning away from home and being a big old momma's boy (you know he totally is).

My question is why did Hermione go into Ravenclaw? What changed from the books to your story to change her mind/destiny? I get Neville's change, I think. Without his parents in the state they were in, Neville never really had to be brave and he never had anything to really strive to be. He spent so much of his childhood being pushed by Gran but also by himself to be like his parents to honor them.

HARRY YOU LITTLE SLYTHERIN! I really hope that Harry doesn't become a little prat like Draco! I really do hope that Harry, Neville, Ron, and Hermione could be the poster children for the interhouse unity. I love that idea!

The best line of the entire chapter was "shed announced her lifes ambition as becoming a trophy wife when she introduced herself to the others" because first of all, that's hilarious but also I could totally see that being book Pansy's ambition all along.

Honestly, I love what you did with the whole story. I haven't read a lot of AUs like this before and this just completely opened my eyes. Also, you incorporated so many details into the story like 'parseltongue' that I just absolutely can't believe you were so thorough. I don't think I could have been.

I see that this is "completed" and I won't argue that it's not complete, but I will say that at the end of this, I want more. If you ever run out of other ideas, I think you should totally come back and give us snippets into Harry's other years at Hogwarts. Does he still make the quidditch team? Is it still in his first year? Where is my beloved Hagrid? Did you give him a happily ever after? Does Neville ever make his move? Do we still have a triwizard tournament? I NEED MORE!

All in all, I think you did a lovely job with this story. Your attention to detail and realistic dialogue made this so easy to enjoy! I think it was excellent!

Author's Response: Hello again, Paula!

Haha, yes, the Sorting is a pretty weird thing to put eleven year olds in a new scary place through. But then again, at least they're not fighting a troll. : P

I'm not sure if Hermione is Lily all over again, though - I don't think Harry has quite fathomed the Hermione-ness of Hermione yet. Like, I'm sure Lily loves Hogwarts, A History, but I don't think she has the whole book memorised the way Hermione does, haha!

And as for why Hermione's in Ravenclaw... well, I tried to leave a few hints in the story, but maybe it's too subtle. Part of it, I think, is meeting Harry, Ron and Neville, and being turned off by Harry and Ron's behaviour towards her (like they are by her behaviour). And Harry and Ron says they'll be Gryffindors for sure. Neville, meanwhile, is less sure, and he's the one she likes the best. She has this line in the last chapter where she says that Ravenclaw might be better than Gryffindor and Harry feels like he was just insulted, which tries to get this across But another big thing, I think, is that Flitwick instead of McGonagall is Deputy Headmaster. The Deputy is the one who meets with prospective Hogwarts students who are Muggleborn (I think this is canon at least!), and in this timeline that means that Hermione's first introduction to the magical world was through a Ravenclaw instead of a Gryffindor. Without McGonagall showing that there is room for studiousness in Gryffindor, she might have gone more by stereotypes, and ended up in Ravenclaw. Does that make sense?

As for Neville, I just want to point out that it's not just that he isn't 'brave enough' to be a Gryffindor in this universe, but that he has a Hufflepuff role model and parental figure - his mother - who has influenced him, and therefore he leaned a little more Hufflepuff in this world.

I think this Harry will have a lot more prat-ish tendencies than the canon one, but I'm sure he can overcome them! And the inter-house unity thing is basically canon for this story. I mean, I'll never write it, but that's definitely how it would go if I did.

Heh, I'm happy you like that line about Pansy, because I debated a lot with myself about whether I should keep it in or not. I have a lot of love for Pansy, even though she's not a great person, and I think there's a lot more to her than wanting to be a trophy wife... but I also really believe that that's something she had as her goal, especially at age eleven, so...

I'm happy you liked this story, and the details - I had a blast writing it, and I think the details is a part where that shows through. I also realise that this little snippet of the life of the characters we know and love can make people want more, sorry! I don't know if I'll ever come back to this world or not (but I can tell you one thing for sure - Harry doesn't get on the Quidditch team in his first year, and a good thing too, because that would have gotten to his head horribly!), but I'm happy it got your imagination going. What do YOU think happens next? What do YOU think Hagrid is doing in this world? : P

Again, thank you so, so much for these two lovely reviews! They really made my day, and I've loved seeing them on my 'Unread reviews' tab. : )


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Review #3, by PaulaTheProkaryote Chapter 6 - The Journey from Platform Nine and Three-Quarters

22nd May 2016:
Hello there!


So first of all, this story is a mind-warp. I never really thought much about what Harry's life would have been like without all of the drama that had circled his life. I think you wrote this first chapter exceptionally well! I can't believe how much thought you put into all the details and even though they are slightly altered from the books you still somehow maintained every element! It's absolutely brilliantly done!

I think what this story did most for me is appreciate how the loss of his parents and his horrible childhood really shaped him into the Harry that we know and love.

You paid so much attention to all of the details of what would have been! Finding that his owl was Reinhild instead of Hedwig seemed to be the biggest shocker for me! THAT MEANS HAGRID DIDN'T DO ALL THE GOOD HAGRID STUFF!

I love the fact that his sister is named Marlene, probably after Marlene McKinnon. My favorite thing that you did was the way you wrote Lily. She's such a good mother, as we all knew she would be! She knew instinctively that something was wrong.

YES at Neville being his best friend! I love that so very much. AND FRANK AND ALICE ARE OKAY! AND PETTIGREW IS DEAD! We get everything, don't we! Also, I love the whole Snape helping the Order and the trap being set up. Snape and Lily still being at least somewhat friends. I love it all! I really do. Where is Sirius and Remus? Do we still have them? What are they up to?

Chudley Cannons! Did you hear we only lost by twenty points our last match? That's the best line in this entire story. I would completely be Harry in that situation. Err. Congrats? Sorry?

Oh my god, the fighting the troll bit! That's hilarious!

I only have one question at the end of this chapter. One you'll probably maybe answer in the next one. WHERE IS HAGRID?!

Author's Response: WOW THESE REVIEWS, PAULA!

I’m a bit at a loss for words over the praise you've heaped over me here, haha! I did really have a lot of fun writing this story, and I'm... flattered(?) that this you chose to read this as your first venture into this kind of AU story. These sorts of what ifs that changes everything while lots of things stay the same are sort of my favourite genre to write, but I don't have many of them posted, because they always get away from me length-wise. This is why I limited this story to two chapters, haha!

But yeah, I love thinking up all those little details that you seem to appreciate so much, hehe. And you saying that this made you appreciate how Harry's circumstances in canon helped make him who he is is great, because that's exactly what I was trying to get across with this story; that a Harry that got to grow up with his parents would be very different in some respects (some of it for the better, some for the worse). Though I also worked hard to make him be the same too, and as I wrote this I actually had Philosopher's Stone open beside the computer all the way through, heh.

Ah, but how do you know that Harry didn't get Reinhild from Hagrid? (How do you know it isn't the same owl as Hedwig, for that matter?) I mean, I don't think Hagrid would take Harry shopping for Hogwarts if Lily and James were alive, but he might still give him an owl as a birthday gift, right? : )

Yes, Harry's sister is named after Marlene McKinnon! I actually have another headcanon name for what Harry's sister would be called if he had one, but then I realised that Lily might want to name her daughter after a dead friend (and I sort of wanted to show that there were still causalities in the war against Voldemort even though it ended differently...). As for Lily immediately noticing that something was wrong with Harry, that was actually inspired by the DH Epilogue, where Harry does something similar for Albus. : )

Yes, haha, we sort of do get everything in this story! I decided to make this little AU the ultimate happy place, seeing as I don't plan to actually write any of the parts of the story that would require conflict. As for Sirius and Remus... well, in one of the earlier drafts for this story they featured, but then I decided to cut them out to make the chapter less crowded, and to make things a little more open. We know that Sirius is alive from the next chapter, and if Remus was dead it'd probably be mentioned, but more than that, well... maybe Sirius works as an Auror with James, Frank and Alice, and Remus with something werewolf-related for the ministry? Maybe they're together? Who knows? : )

Hehe, I'm happy you liked my little Chudley Cannons and troll fighting-jokes haha. As for Hagrid... hm. Well, I didn't quite answer where he is in the next chapter either, did I? And I know that I mentioned above that he might have given Harry Reinhild, but honestly I haven't even decided whether he's alive or not in this AU. But if he is, it's clear he's moved on to other pastures than working as the Hogwarts groundskeeper - maybe when Dumbledore quit as Headmaster? Maybe Hagrid works with dragons now, as he does in another similar AU that I'm slowly writing...?

All in all, thanks for this wonderful review, and the next! I've been meaning to check out your stuff for a while, and I will soon!

All the best to you,

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Review #4, by Mr Penn Chapter 6 - The Journey from Platform Nine and Three-Quarters

10th May 2016:
Hey Kapa, its Penn from the forum for our multi-chapter review swap. Sorry for the tardiness, RL has been a mess and I couldn't get enough time to complete reviews properly. Better late than never I believe.

I really love reading AUs, mostly because they allow us to explore the creative aspects of the story all the while remaining within the general boundaries of the story. So when I read the summary, I immediately jumped on the wagon. So glad I did.

To read Harry having a family and friends is really refreshing in ways. It just shows how different it could have been.

The playful banter that James and Lily engage in is so realistic. James would never really mend his ways and poor Lily would always have to pick on the pieces of the mess that he would create.

All in all it was a really good start to a story that promises much. Can't wait to read more.

Thanks for the swap Kapa

Author's Response: Hello again!

I definitely believe in better late than never too, haha!

I love AUs too! Usually I go for small AUs with the focus on romance for non-canon pairings, but these larger AUs are so much fun to explore! I definitely had a lot of fun trying to imagine a believable Harry who grew up with a family. It was also a challenge trying to write a balanced relationship between James and Lily, where the banter's still there, but they ultimately know where they have each other and that they have each other's backs - especially as this version of them apparently helped take down Voldemort together. That creates a band that's hard to break, I'd believe. I'm happy that you think their relationship works. : )

Thanks for the swap to you too, and let's do it again some time (when I'm not drowning in school work)!


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Review #5, by Mr Penn Chapter 7 - The Sorting Hat

10th May 2016:
This is Penn for our multi-chapter review swap.

Harry is in Slytherin... OOOH THIS IS GONNA BE FUN!

You have opened up so many avenues here. Will the Hogwarts Express quartet continue to remain friends even though they are in different Houses? That would be so cool because once again we will have something like the Founders coming together. Four people with four different ideologies all for a common cause.

Or are we gonna see Harry's loyalties firmly with the green and silver, plotting the downfall of the other Houses? That is one story arc I hope you do not exploit. Slytherins are a lot more than just nasty people. Ok that's the Slytherin in me speaking but you get the idea.

Amazingly written Kapa. We know these characters all too well so it becomes easier to feel that 'this doesn't feel like him'. Kudos to you that the thought never really comes up in your story.

Please tell me you plan on writing further chapters. This has amazing potential as a story. Please Please Pretty Please

Author's Response: Hello there, Penn!

First of... was this supposed to be a multi chapter swap? Woops, that wasn't how I understood it. And I don't really have time to leave a second review for you at the moment, sorry. But maybe we can swap again some time?

I've already told you that I sadly don't plan to write any more chapters for this story (sorry), but I'm happy you liked what little there is, and that I got you speculating about what might happen next. If I had to guess, it'd be more about House Unity than someone plotting to take the other houses down - but who would be the antagonist?

I actually have some ideas for similar stories that would actually be full length stories and not just snippets like this (one about Hermione in a world where there never was a Voldemort, one about Albus Potter and a mystery about the Hogwarts founders), but I don't have time to write something novel length at this time in my life (I mean, I hardly have time to leave reviews - or respond to them!).

Oh, and it's good to hear that you think I did the characters justice - it was a hard line to walk, keeping them similar to their canon selves but still a little different, a they've had different life experiences (except Hermione, I guess...).


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