2 Reviews Found

Review #1, by CaramelDiamant The Room of Requirement

16th April 2016:
Hello there Alys,

I stumbled upon your story today and thought Iíd leave a review for you :)

I really liked your way of giving Hermione her own story with the RoR, and syncing it with canon information. Think of it, Hermione mustíve been lonely a lot of times and it's understandable that she might want to spend time with herself somewhere else than in the library sitting with the boys all year round. My only issue with the Ďhistoryí youíve given us is that itís pretty much only history, maybe you could add a tiny bit more Ďactioní or even description of the surroundings, so that we as readers delve into the story directly from the start.

Oh yes, Fred! Itís really nice to read a story where there are distinct differences between the twins and you managed to do that! Sometimes the twins come off as brain-less pranksters, which I think doesnít do them justice. In your piece it feels like Fredís the brain behind the plans and George is the creative/active part, which makes them the two sides of the same coin. On the same page I think it is very important to mention that Fred, despite needing space for him, still feels a bit guilty about hiding from George and Lee. I'm intrigued to see if you'll be exploring their relationship further.

Telling the story from two POVs is a concept that I generally enjoy; the RoR is an interesting turning angle, where we see Hermione and Fred getting in and out. I especially liked the way you made the books/ bookshelf subject of different interpretations between the two characters. A bit more variation in language would be nice to encourage this, because I noticed you sometimes used almost the same sentence to describe what is going on. That might be just my personal preference though :)

All in all Iím curious to see where youíre leading us!
Cheers, Jo

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Review #2, by M.L.R The Grand and Wonderful Yule Ball

10th April 2016:
You are doing amazing! Keep up the writing. You never know where you will end up.

Author's Response: THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! That really means a lot! And thank you for reading!!!

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