Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.

Reading Reviews for Out By The Water
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by PaulaTheProkaryote Absence

20th June 2016:
I love Cho/Cedric stories. Iíve ranted before, but Harry was really the least understanding person about her grief when he should have been the most understanding. She wouldn't have been hopelessly alone if he could just break his selfish obsession then semi-hatred of her long enough to be the person she needed during that grieving period.

In so few words you told a really powerful story. The bit about only the ghosts being able to understand was really powerful. The whole scene of her sitting by the lake made me feel very helpless for her. I want her friends to try harder, to be there, even if they can't possibly understand, just to sit with her. After that kind of loss she needs someone. I think that their intentions were good though, despite the whispering. Of course they are concerned about her.

The best line of the chapter in my opinion was: My soul is frozen like the roots of flowers after the first frost; only it will never have the chance at thawing. YIKES. Thatís so elegantly written but so devastating.

 Report Review

Review #2, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap Absence

5th March 2016:
ďFor the HPFF Review-A-ThonĒ

My soul is frozen like the roots of flowers after the first frost; only it will never have the chance at thawing.

In five hundred words you have painted a magnificent picture. I was going to read one of your novellas/novels but then I saw the banner and the story called to me.

First off, I love this song. I could hear it in my head as I read along but it was slower, more lyrical and really pared well with the story.

Iím glad you chose to write about Cho. I donít think enough people show her love and give her the justice that she deserves. I could definitely see her sitting there thinking about Cedric and feeling his presence. Or at least hoping for it anyway.

The line about the ghosts of Hogwarts was really powerful too. I never realized how much Hogwarts really does become a burial ground. The Haunted Halls of Hogwarts. How long do you think Cho would have mourned Cedric? I always believe forever. She would remember him forever and though it would hurt less there would always be that reminder of that boy that stole her heart, a champion.

Really nice job. Thanks for another enjoyable read.

Author's Response: Hey Deeds!

Funny that you picked arguably the most depressing on my page considering that you are the master of humor.

Ah! This is exactly how I imagined it. I love the song Valerie...and for this I sort of imagined a haunting, slow version.

I have to admit that I don't particularly care for Cho in cannon. I find her to be whiny and annoying to be blunt, but when I really stop and think about what she's been through, I suppose she has the right. She saw her boyfriend's dead body and has to live with him having been murdered and the world not excepting what happened to him.

Yeah. I imagine Hogwarts could be a pretty depressing, bleak place under the right circumstance.

I think she would've mourned intensely for a couple of months. Then we see she eventually tries unsuccessfully to move on. I haven't quite decided if she's the type that ever really gets over it or not.

Thanks for the read and for participating in the Review-A-Thon!


 Report Review

Review #3, by princesslily_36 Absence

5th March 2016:
You. Are. Absolutely. Wonderfully. Just. So. AMAZING!

Ysh here for the HPFF Review-a-thon!

You've made this absolutely narrow reading person branch out thanks to this review-a-thon, so I'm reading this even though I see a very inviting Jily story on the third age of your AP :D

Your descriptions... I always drown in your words. You established the scene with the first paragraph, and then the mood with the second, with the third you delved into her feelings and in the fourth you told us our thoughts. I know you wouldn't have planned it this way, but the way I saw the flow, you just eased us into the mind of Cho Chang.

It's just so sad what happened to her. I don't like her much, but isn't that because we see her through Harry's eyes? He felt she was too weepy and weak... granted she's no Ginny Weasley, but different people deal with horrors in different ways, and you have brought out her inner struggles so perfectly, almost telling us how human she is.

The phantom of your kisses tingle along my cheekbones like an amputated appendage. - This is so beautifully poetically sad *sob*

How have you managed to convey so much in such few words? It's just so amazing. There was something so flowery about this prose, but it didn't seem to linger on any unnecessary aspect you know.. so concise, yet packed with emotion. For a moment there, when you described Cho looking into the Murky depths, I was almost transported to the scene. I always feel this when I read your stories, you just have a way of drawing the readers in.

Great work!

 Report Review

Review #4, by NPE Absence

23rd February 2016:
Hi Kaitlin,

Always good to return to your work. Have loved doing the multi-review swap with you.

Hope you're feeling a bit better :)

I was in straight away, being a big Winehouse fan :)

I think this is maybe my favourite concept of yours ever. Hyperbole I know, but I am so taken by the idea.

Your writing and prose style here is so lucid, visceral and clear.

"Instead, Iím left with unseeing, glassy eyes seared into my dreams and night terrors where you die over and over again."

This sentence really lingered for some reason, and I really respect that.

I think at times, when you end it saying about being hopelessly lone, it is a little directive, but truthfully, on a subjective level I really loved this.



Author's Response: Hey Nick!

I've enjoyed the multi-swap as well.

Yay! A Winehouse fan! So am I. Truthfully, I always worry when I do song challenges because it happens so often that I get stuck with a song I don't know, but for this challenge it worked out great. I love the song Valerie!

I'm thrilled that you like this one. I was honestly really struggling with the prose for this. It took a lot of re-writes to get it where it is now.

I love that line! :D

I have to work on that being to direct thing. It's a weakness of mine both in real life and in writing!

Thanks for the review.


 Report Review

Review #5, by Dobby the Free Elf Absence

21st February 2016:
Hi Kaitlin! Dobby is here to cheer you to your finish line! Miss Kaitlin has got the attention of all the Hogwarts House Elves with her goal of 100 challenges. We is very impressed by how much work you've put in.

Dobby feels guilty that he didn't like Cho much before; now after reading this, Dobby feels he must set a hot iron on his hands. Cho is so sad in this and her grief stands out in how numb she is to everything, be it the sun or fish or even her friends. It's very empty, and that emptiness has a presence. Cedric's absence is legitimately a character in this story.

Your imagery is stunning. And Dobby is most impressed with how Miss TreacleTart has managed to say so much in so few words. That is very difficult to do - as difficult as Dobby trying to stop himself from hitting his head against the window when he does something bad. It is a short and very powerful story - but we all knows that size is no guarantee of power: Dobby is small and saved Harry Potter from Death Eaters. Miss Kaitlin writes grief so well in this, particularly how you focus on emptiness rather than just sadness.

(slipping out of character now, but I can't convey this much enthusiasm as Dobby: GO KAITLIN, YOU ARE A SUPERHERO AND YOU ARE AMAZING. You inspire me. ♡ ♡ )

Author's Response: Hello Dobby!

I'm so thrilled to see you! I'm so honoured that you've come to visit!

Oh Dobby! Please don't set a hot iron to your hands! I think there are a lot of us that didn't exactly love Cho. But her story is definitely sad.

Thank you very much Dobby. I'm glad that you appreciated the imagery.

Thank you so much for all of your encouragement and support! I really appreciate it!


 Report Review

Review #6, by Challenge Cheerleader Absence

20th February 2016:
Oh, Kaitlin! My heart hurts! How sad and lonely they are! The wasting away...ignoring those who were their 'friends once, a lifetime ago'...pretending that the lost lover is still there...heartbreaking! I love your descriptive powers, so poetic, which makes it even more gut-wrenching.

I, too, envisioned Cho Chang...mourning for Cedric.

Excellent work!! Bravo! (sniff, sniff!)

Author's Response: Hello my dear Challenge Cheerleader!

Cho is definitely heartbroken over the loss of Cedric, so I'm glad those things came across in the story.

Thank you so much for your support and encouragement!


 Report Review

Review #7, by Freda_and_Georgina Absence

15th February 2016:
Hello! We heard about your attempt to write for 100 challenges and wanted to cheer you on!

So this story was so beautiful. I really like your portrayal of Cho's mourning, I imagine it was intense especially directly after his death. He's gone, and now her life will never be the same. I also like how you have her numb to even her friends' judgment--for a teenage girl that is a huge deal, poor Cho. I never liked Cho, but I also never disliked her, but this story has certainly stirred up my pity for her. I can't even imagine losing your boyfriend at age sixteen to a Dark Lord while most people say it couldn't have happened.

Though this is a short story there is a lot packed into it. The numbness, the memories, and the overflowing sympathy for the main character. Excellent work!

Author's Response: Hello Georgina!

Thank you so much for the support and cheer! It's very much appreciated.:hug:

I'm glad that this story made you feel a bit of pity for Cho. She wasn't necessarily my favorite character in cannon, so writing her story really helped me to connect with her.

Thank you again so much for your support and encouragement!


 Report Review

Review #8, by Secret Cupid Absence

14th February 2016:
Sigh... This was so sad...
How could you make me feel so emotional with so little words?

Poor Cho... You wrote her loneliness, the void of her loss, so beautifully! I can totally see her sitting at the edge of the lake, the solitude, the silence, the memories...

What can I say about this, except that it is perfection and pure poetry? Excuse me, now... I need to go cry for a bit...

Your Secret Cupid

Author's Response: Hello my dear Secret Cupid!

I'm sorry for making you feel emotional. :hug:

I'm glad that her loneliness came across strongly for you. In such a short piece, I really wanted to focus on the emotion.

Aww. Thank you so much. I'm not sure anyone has ever called my writing perfection and it's truly humbling for you to say so.

Thank you for this lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #9, by ProfessorMinnie Absence

13th February 2016:
Valerie is a strange mix for me. It's one of those songs where the beat doesn't match the message. I think for me, it's about a friend missing a friend and wondering how they've changed when they've been away, or how the friend's perception of them has changed.

In this rather succinct yet well written one shot, you have Cho mourning Cedric on the Black lake, giving the lyrics to the song a more morbid meaning. Cho's Valerie (Cedric) isn't gone because he's in jail or moved away, he's dead and she's mourning her loss of love and the life she knew. Very well done.

What I would like to see next if you would be willing to write it is... another chapter. This one shot was jam packed with emotion. I think it would be interesting if you took this farther and maybe showed Cho through the stages of her grief. This part seems to be a fair bit after Cedric died, as Cho isn't in denial. But I digress.

Overall, I think it was well written yet very short. You took the song I prompted you with and ran with it in a direction I didn't think of. A very good job indeed.

Happy writing!


Author's Response: Hey Minnie!

I definitely agree about the song, but absolutely adore it anyway. I was so excited when I got this one.

Almost immediately I knew that I had to write Cho for this. The lyrics really made me think of Cedric's death.

I appreciate that you liked this enough to want more, but I really feel strongly about this being a one-shot. It's only meant to be a brief glimpse into a solitary moment. I think expanding on it might make it less poignant.

I'm so glad you liked this. I was worried it might be too out there or that I ran too far with the prompt.

Thanks for the lovely challenge!


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login