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Reading Reviews for Camouflaged Cravings
  
3 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Marshal The Price of Camouflage

19th June 2016:
For the LGBTQA+ Review Event

This is such an interesting take on this rare pair. I wondered about the title and who was hiding. It is interesting to see that it was James who hid his true feelings. I like how you worked to make this ship remain in canon. You worked that in very nicely. I honestly feel bad for Sirius in this situation. I also wonder what you think would happen if James and Lily survived if James would have finally found courage and left her for Sirius or not. Either way the last line was very nicely done about how he would feel guilt and heart break till his last breath. It was a nice touch and a good way to seal in the fact that James would die just as he did in canon. Over all well done!

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Review #2, by Thea The Price of Camouflage

22nd January 2016:
I felt you wrote a very convincing Sirius and I enjoyed Sirius and James interaction for the first three quarters, the kiss scene even seemed very natural when I felt it might take more than a oneshot to convince me of the relationship but I felt the last quarter felt a bit messier, somehow I don't think I've seen enough of your James and Sirius to convince me that they'd deal with things in that way on the other hand if it had been longer I might have been convinced. Overall it was interesting view of a ship I haven't often seemed portrayed despite their canon closeness. The only other thing in any marauder thing it would be nice to see Peter not having the unpleasent role for a change maybe Remus could snore and Peter complain, not you personally but he seems to get a bit of a raw deal in Fanfiction, it's a minor thing but when most fan author cast him as a comedy irritation it would be nice to see the mold broken occasionally even when he only has a minor role. Overall really enjoyed it and will check out your other stories.

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for the review :)

I will definitely take your advice into consideration and rewrite the ending, giving more detail into how they react to each other and drawing it out a bit more to ensure that their relationship seems convincing in the latter part of the story. Thank you for that!

I totally understand what you mean about Peter always playing the second string role and being the unpleasant one. I may add in another tidbit about him, separate from the snoring one, just because I feel like it's more in Remus' character to scold James and Sirius for not having their homework done and to be reading a book. I will definitely read over and see if I can write something about Peter that breaks common conceptions about him. In my other Marauders story, I also try to do that where Peter isn't always the unpleasant one, however sometimes it just fits better with the story because it helps support why he would betray his friends later on.

Really glad that you enjoyed it and I will edit the story with your suggestions :) Thank you!

-Maraudergeek


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Review #3, by Ignis the Imp The Price of Camouflage

19th January 2016:
Hehehe... This is Ignus the Imp here to leave you a rouge review!

I see my old imps-in-crime James Potter and Sirius Black here. Such thick friends they used to be. Hehe the cloak and the map explains the trouble they got into back in the days!

This is such a lovely story. James and Sirius meant so much to each other that the what-if almost makes your heart ache. You have captured that wonderfully in this fic. Sirius' inner dialemma, and jealousy towards Lily Evans, especially the morning after they kissed, all very well done. Sirius' frustratings giving in to moodiness and finally ending in anger is so in character for him, and reminds me of that little lad I knew from his Hogwarts days. Sirius' hesitation before he confessed to James followed by the flurry of insecurity after he had was really well written. The kiss was amazing as well.

But best of all, I loved the ending. How it flowed naturally from James/Sirius to James/Lily. I was wondering how you were going to make the shift. It was heartbreaking when Sirius was crying with anger and disappointment in that bathroom, and worse when James admitted to liking him but scared to come out. James thoughts as they alternated between Lily and Sirius, you wrote it so well I could feel the pain.

Good Luck with the challenge!

Ignis the Imp

Author's Response: Thank you so much! This review means so much to me :)

I'm so happy that you thought it was well written, I absolutely loved writing it. As soon as I began writing, I just couldn't stop. I never have trouble with inspiration when it comes to the Marauders :)

Yay! So happy you liked the ending as well. That was what gave me the biggest problems, and I was hesitant about posting it before editing it a little more. But I'm so grateful for the positive feedback!!

Thank you!

Maraudergeek


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