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Reading Reviews for Loose Lips Sink Ships
5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Musing I Know Places

14th April 2016:
Hi Ellie!! I've finally started reviewing the Taylor Swift Ultimate challenge entries :)

I really LIKED this story. I feel that you've characterised both Sirius and Remus beautifully. Remus with his fear of intimacy and shy personality and the confident demeanour of Sirius ring true to me.

Your descriptions are lovely. I could totally grasp the tension in the beginning during the chase and then the way the romantic moment between Remus and Sirius rolled out was awesome. You've incorporated both the song and the prompt very nicely. I had a AHA moment when I read these lines - 'Another Muggle caught us in a forbidden act. This time, though, performing a very different kind of magic.' I loved the way you used the prompt in two different ways. That's really very creative. ;)

One of my favourite lines of the story was : ...my fear of his rejection drowned with my cloak in the water.

I really enjoyed reading this one-shot. Thank you so much for participating in the challenge and sharing this story with us :D


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Review #2, by adluvshp I Know Places

13th March 2016:
OMG WOLFSTAR FEELS. ELLIE. *clutches heart* This was too cute and sweet and nice and awesome and omg I loved it so much! I love you for writing this!

Your characterisation of Remus is too sweet and too on point. In other words, it's perfect. His insecurities, fear of rejection, his hesitancy, his love for Sirius, it's all written so very well. I absolutely loved him. His emotions were so raw and real and just beautiful and I wanted to hug him when he thought Sirius was rejecting his love.

And then Sirius. His carefree attitude, his playfulness, and yet the way he reciprocated Remus' feelings - it was just awesome. I was grinning when I was reading the kiss he and Remus shared. The way they got interrupted and how he handled the situation effortlessly was brilliant, haha.

And then the ending. Just D'awww! Loved it =)

Overall, this was a great read and I loved it. Thank you for helping out in Quidditch riddle hunting - this review is just my way of saying thank you.

(Lost Muse)

Author's Response: HOWLLLIN FOR WOLFSTAR! hey ang ;)

yayay! I'm glad you felt that I really got these characters. Remus is one of my most favs, and Sirius is legit one of the hardest (besides Harry) for me to write, so I wanted to do them justice!

d'awwws to you too. those riddle hunts omg. I can't. I think I'm scarred lol. way to play so well for our team, and represent slytherin in the most amazing ways possible every day on HPFF!

love ya!

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Review #3, by Anna_ I Know Places

11th March 2016:
Okay, so I found this story through the challenge, and I gotta say I'm hungry for more. I make a habit of not checking which characters are included in the story before reading and was very plesantly surprised when the name of the narrarator was released. Very beautiful job there. You gave beautiful insight into each of these characters and I was hanging on a thread.

I see you closed the story but I humbly request a reopening. I'm not done with seeing how they progress as a couple and what michief they can cause now that their feelings are known.

Author's Response: Hi Anna!

Thank you for dropping by, and for the lovely random review - definitely makes me happy when people read and review, so thanks :)

I will a similar habit, I usually rely on the banner and summary to do the trick haha. This was my first Wolfstar, so I'm hapy you enjoyed it and want to see more. I don't foresee that happening right now, but I take it like such a compliment, so I appreciate it so much.


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Review #4, by Secret Cupid I Know Places

13th February 2016:
Hi again!

Wow I loved this. I love myself some Remus/Sirius or anything Sirius really. So naturally I loved this one shot so much.

I love how you immediately cast us into action, yet at the same time immediately into Remus's lack of confidence and hesitant personality. You hit me in every direction with that, immediate suspense and alarm but at the same time hope and feels.

I think your characterization was well written. Remus was just as hesitant and afraid as I always picture him and Sirius was dragging him along, arrogant and sure of himself. My heart stopped along with Remus's when Sirius hesitated because, as you said, Sirius never hesitates. You dove into their characters so efficiently for such a short story. Usually that can be one reason why one shots aren't intense, because of a lackind of characterization, but that wasn't the case here. I enjoyed every hearted word of this.

I hope it did well in the challenge. This was amazing. Well done!

Author's Response: Hi again!! Thanks once again for a lovely reviews. They make me smile every time I read them :)

YAY this is my first stab at this pairing, so I'm so happy you enjoyed it and felt that I really nailed down the characters. Sirius is especially difficult for me, so thanks for the confidence boost :)

challenge isn't over yet, so *fingers crossed*

-wub, ellie

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Review #5, by krazyboutharryginny I Know Places

14th January 2016:
Hey Ellie! So sorry that it took me so long to get here. I've had this open in a tab since you gave me the link, but only just got an opportunity to sit down and read it!

I think you did a really great job on this! I know it's your first Wolfstar, but you did such a good job exploring and portraying Remus, Sirius, and their feelings towards each other, that I honestly wouldn't have guessed if I hadn't known going in! I loved the entire first half so much, with the two of them running from the Death Eaters - I thought you did a wonderful job describing that, I could picture the two of them running together in my head. That sort of scenario has always been one that I find really fitting for this pairing.

Another thing I really enjoyed was the scene when they had just gotten out of the Thames and were sort of dealing with the shock of almost dying. There was this feeling of desperation when they kissed and also I liked how, when Remus perceived that Sirius was rejecting him, he was too tired to really register the significance. I thought that was really well done and realistic. I think my favourite line in this whole story is this one:
"My emotions tipped over the edge ages ago, my fear of his rejection drowned on the water."

For a little bit of CC: there were a handful of sentences and word choices that I found a bit clunky/awkward.
"The contact of our flesh lit a fire inside me that I didnít want to squelch anytime soon." The word "squelch" in this sentence is really not sitting right with me and actually kind of drew me out of the story for a second. Maybe "put out" or "extinguish" instead?
"For more than once in my life, I was grateful for the lack of a full moon." This is just kind of clunky. Maybe "Not for the first time, I was grateful..." or something similar?

That small bit of CC aside, I thought this story was wonderful and that you did a great job with your first attempt at this pairing! Excellent work!


Author's Response: Kayla!!

Don't apologize, this was quick and more than I expected, thanks for your kindness and the review in general :D

I'm glad you enjoyed this one-shot, and felt all the realistic aspects of what I was exploring here with Remus and Sirius. I always see them on the run too, and it's just such a visceral way to write them. I'm glad you saw the scene in your head, running is an awkward thing to write because it's a thing you just do haha.

I love CC, and appreciate your comments! I think you're 110 percent right and I have fixed those sections (along with some other bits that weren't as smooth). This is what I get for writing and posting something withing three hours without reading it over haha.

Thanks so much, I enjoyed your Wolfstar too btw ;)


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