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Reading Reviews for edges
  
17 Reviews Found

Review #1, by TidalDragon and we will stumble through heaven

12th May 2016:
Howdy Kayla! I'm here on my quest to R&R all the Golden Paw entries! #moonlightmadness

Anyway, your story is in something of a unique position because I've actually read it a couple of times, but never had the time to leave a review then because I wasn't sure I could capture it in the spare moment I'd originally allotted to the task.

The reason this story resides first in the Best Description category is, for me anyway, obvious. As someone who struggles to do description well, at least consistently, I'm truly blown away by the way you master it in each moment. The scenes are always well set of course, but you do more. You capture the details of faces and mannerisms exquisitely. You weave people and places and things together with emotions so that they're inseparable, elevating their impact to something far more than it would've been if they'd been compartmentalized and dealt with each in turn.

That, I think is the true genius of your talent. Not only are you capable of capturing each discrete type of description - you fold it together into something that flows effortlessly and truly bursts to life on the (in our case more metaphorical) page.

Beyond merely the descriptions though, this story was exceptional in other ways. It deals with Remus and Sirius both with such nuance and care, but simultaneously with such certainty. For such complex characters, it's a risk, but as with many risky maneuvers the reward is high because you pull it off so expertly, mixing their strengths with their insecurities, their highs with their lows, their unique passion and awkwardness and fear.

Brilliantly done Kayla!

Author's Response: Hi Kevin!

Wow, I had no idea you'd read this story before! :o

I honestly really struggle with description too - so I'm pretty proud of how this story turned out!

omg, all this flattery! :') I honestly don't know what to say! Thank you so much! I am really, really glad that you enjoyed this story, and thank you so much for the wonderful review!

-Kayla


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Review #2, by Slide and we will stumble through heaven

2nd April 2016:
Here from Twitter. Also from procrastinating! Stylistically I'm a weird fan of this sort of thing - I don't tend to seek out big, non-linear, present tense stories, but I experiment with it myself and love supporting people when they experiment? Plus, Wolfstar. What's not to love.

Remus living on a mixture of fear and thrills in his new friendship is believable and very sweet - there's a liberation in this new way of life, not just for having friends but what his friends are like. It's a kind of emotional recklessness I could understand from his way of life until now. And the foursome with stars in their eyes, dreaming of being a big future is as sweet as it is depressingly doomed.

Sirius the death-seeker, or at least the one with no fear of death, is also thoroughly believable and in-line with who he becomes in canon. It makes a beautiful contrast between the two, of fear and fearlessness, Sirius destroying himself from within and Remus SHIELDING himself from within. Rather loving all of the duality within this; it's what the best characterisation's made of.

Might be a formatting issue at 'He doesn't say I was worried about you' and 'he also doesn't ask How are you feeling' - I get not using punctuation to help keep the flow, but maybe italics?

The little note of Sirius being insecure in how to show affection is lovely. Also love the timing of the Prank and Sirius running away from home; hadn't really thought of those two incidents coming so close together before, though it makes sense to time the reconciliation with Sirius' big change. It would take a LOT to reconcile from the Prank.

Oh, Remus reliving Sirius' laughter post-James and Lily's death, after you set up his laughter as such a beautiful and terrifying thing, is just perfect. Horrid, but perfect.

Really like this; it's a great piece juxtaposing the characters andthe nature of their damage, the nature of how they deal with that damage together and apart. The non-linear setup really works, letting us see them from all different angles and build up a picture of completion, instead of just time.

Good stuff!

Author's Response: Hello!

First of all, I am so sorry for the super-late response. :(

Second of all, thank you so much for this absolutely wonderful review!

It's always a huge relief to be told my characterization is believable, as being OOC is a big fear of mine. All my headcanons and the way that I write these characters is very much in line with what I pulled from and took away from my own readings of the books, but I know a lot of people see these characters very differently, so it's always really great when I get reviews like this!

I see so much duality within the pairing of Wolfstar, as well as within both of the characters, so I really wanted to include that duality in this piece and make it almost a theme.

Oops! That bit actually does have italics in my word doc - the formatting must have gotten messed up! Thanks for pointing it out - I've fixed it :)

The Prank and Sirius running away from home are actually about a year apart in canon, I think, but in my story "Breathe" I ended up changing the year he ran away from after 6th year to after 5th year, making the two events much closer. I kind of like it better that way, timeline-wise, so I left it like that in this story. But that actually is a little bit AU.

I'm so glad that you enjoyed this! Thank you again for this really lovely review!

-Kayla


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Review #3, by victoria_anne and we will stumble through heaven

13th March 2016:
*standing ovation*

How d-do I... review... s-something like this?!

This was absolutely amazing! You've sucked me into wolfstar, and your writing makes me want to curl up and sob into a pillow it's so beautiful.

I love how it was non-linear, it was like reading little snippets of their time together, scattered around the screen. It works better this way than were you to write them in order.

And you used Halsey! I love her so much and one of my stories is inspired by one or two of her songs! Especially Young God, fits perfectly with a Marauder story, and eeespecially involving Sirius and Remus!

Ugh, I'm trying to write a good review but also trying to contain my excitement, this is just incredible.

*bows down, then reaches up to click favourite button*

Love Bianca

Author's Response: Hi Bianca! Thank you so much! This review is really sweet and I'm so happy that you enjoyed reading this!
I'll swing by your AP sometime to check out your Halsey story. Hopefully I'll have time to do that soon :)
-Kayla


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Review #4, by PaulaTheProkaryote and we will stumble through heaven

6th March 2016:
Hello!

First, I'm quite pleased that you included Peter in a way that made him seem more than just some fluttering background character. Some stories just seem to rule him out.

I definitely understand the apprehension that Remus is feeling, despite being so young. I think his disease forced him to grow up faster than everyone else and it isn't really fair to him.

I enjoy reading the beginning in which he's naive and believes that his new best friends would discard him. He really underestimates them.

I like that even in combat, Sirius seems so arrogant and careless. It's quite true to what I always imagine.

My heart breaks just a little at how sweet and perfect and broken Remus and Sirius seem to be, knowing what is coming next.

The monster bit with Sirius was so well written and warm and comforting and my heart feels so bubbly. That's exactly the response that someone so close to you should say in that situation. No condemnation, just comfort.

So much of me wishes that my favorite fictional characters didn't have the hardships that they do (even if that'd be incredibly boring) purely because I don't want them to suffer. I was Remus and Sirius to be able to buy furniture together and grocery shop and have the normal life they deserve.

I actually really liked the non-linear telling of the story. I feel like it gave me more insight into the growth of the characters without making it seem too snippy or rushed. I think you did an excellent job telling this story and your writing was fluid. This was a very pleasant read!

Author's Response: Hello :)

I definitely agree with you about Remus. I don't think that he'd be an overly-mature stick in the mud the way some fics make him out to be, but I do think he'd be mature for his age because of the things he has to deal with.

I also totally agree with what you said about not wanting your favourite characters to suffer - yet here I am, writing stuff like this, lol.

I'm glad you liked the non-linear format and the story overall :)

Thanks for the review! :D

-Kayla


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Review #5, by toomanycurls and we will stumble through heaven

6th February 2016:
It's hard to review something so well done. I've read (and written) a lot of wolfstar and this satisfies everything I need from one. There's angst, tenuous feelings, flighty emotions, love, sexy time, everything. And it left me broken at the end.

I love the image of them both being broken and monsters is fantastic. Remus feeling that way about himself makes sense. Sirius seeing himself like that is so much sadder for me but also makes sense.

Sirius with his hair in a bun sounds yummy. I asked Mr Curls if he'd do one but... No. :(

Yumminess aside, I loved the contrast between Remus and Sirius' fighting style/attitude. Sirius reminds me of someone who just has a natural talent about things and doesn't have to try hard.

I really loved seeing Sirius tenderly caring for Remus before the full moon. The details you added about him not experiencing someone wiping away tears for him hit he hard. You did such a great job showing how some people are broken by family and others by nature. In another family, Sirius would have been whole. If not for the wolf, Remus would be whole too. I wonder if they work together when they're not broken.

Their first flats reminded me of the first place I rented on my own. Remus' observation about his bitterness revealing his flaws was so true too.

I'm not at all surprised that it took Sirius longer to forgive himself for using Remus as bait in a joke. You put it beautifully with him having edges.

The tone and language you used in this was terrific at driving the emotions. I felt like the nonlinear story fit with the idea of edges. If you walk the perimeter of something you'll see a fragmented picture.

Really awesome story!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hey Rose! Sorry it took me such a long time to respond to this D: I'm really glad that you enjoyed reading this, especially since I know (like you mentioned) that you read and write a lot of Wolfstar. Also, that you thought the nonlinear aspect worked with the story.

Thank you so much for the lovely review!

-Kayla


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Review #6, by The Masked Marauder and we will stumble through heaven

17th January 2016:
It is I, the Masked Marauder!

I am partial to the Marauders. They're my namesakes, after all. Of course, not every story can capture their essence entirely. Not every story shows the mischief, the brotherhood, the glint in the eye, and also the tragedy, the weight of war. You've really done it. I am so, so pleased!

The first line is a stroke of utter genius, for of course they are legends - I wouldn't take my name from them other wise! - but not simply for pranks. It's so, so much more.

I sort of want to go through each vignette individually, but that would make this review quite long. The second section is SO well written. The final image there of Remus dragging Sirius away while he laughs is haunting.

The kiss, oh... it's just perfect. I love that you let it stand alone, like a monument to WolfStar. *hearts*

My god, I keep finding more and more I want to praise about this, and I simply can't do it justice. I am SO HAPPY I've found this story. You are beyond brilliant. Please write the Marauders forever and ever and ever!

10/10, for sure!

This review is completely inadequate to do justice to your UTTERLY SUPERB story, but, alas, I must be moving on.

Mischief Managed.
~ Masked Marauder

Author's Response: Hello there! Thanks for this really lovely review! Sorry it took me so long to respond :(

It's such a huge compliment that you think I handled the Marauders well, especially since you love them so much :D

I'm so happy that you liked reading my story! And don't worry, I'm definitely planning to continue writing Marauders stories. Thank you again for the super sweet review!

-Kayla


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Review #7, by notreallyblonde44 and we will stumble through heaven

13th January 2016:
Sooo I went to read your recent Wolfstar, since you were kind enough to offer to help me with mine. Already so enticed and sucked in from the first paragraph. This style of writing reads so effortlessly (though I know that writing is typically not so easy, so kudos to you for flexing your writing muscles and succeeding!).

I put on my BADLANDS jam as I read this. Love how the songs match the pace and tone of your one-shot.

Gosh your descriptive writing is so glorious, your similes and metaphors are beautiful and simple, creating that effortless style I’m greatly enjoying. I love Sirius’ brightness, as a star, and Remus’ desperation as a monster. I love the links your creating between them, their bond strengthening but realistic as they change from the War. “Never quite following me” tone is SO bittersweet and heartbreaking. I would love to see some sort of companion, what Remus does when he finds out that Sirius didn’t do it, etc. I know we saw that in the book, but you explore these characters so well that I would love a momentary happy ending. Their relationship is so beautiful and sad. You did such a lovely job with them.

“wolf-fever” may be my new all-time favorite reference to Remus’ condition. If I ever use it, I will credit you ;)
And they are legends!

Thanks for writing this and sharing it :)
Lub,
ellie

Author's Response: Hey Ellie! It was so nice of you to come leave me a review for this, thank you so much!

This story was SO HARD to write! I've never tried this style before, at least not in such a pronounced way, and it was very difficult. So it's really exciting to hear that it read effortlessly for you and that you enjoyed it!

The song matching the tone of the one-shot was something I was super worried about (although the matching pacing was very intentional and I was quite careful about it). I tried really hard to match the tone but wasn't sure I'd succeeded. So, again,it's exciting to hear that that stuff matched up for you!

Wow, so many people want to see later moments from these two! I don't think it's gonna happen within this story, but maybe I'll write a companion piece like you've suggested :)

I have to be honest - I read a lot of Wolfstars and I'm not sure whether I coined the term "wolf-fever" or if it's something I picked up somewhere. Feel free to use it though!

I'm so happy that you enjoyed my story, thank you again for the unexpected and really lovely review!

-Kayla


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Review #8, by Owlpost68 and we will stumble through heaven

12th January 2016:
So, I think this is my first wolfstar fic that I've read, and mostly really liked it. There were a few times I got confused when you went back and forth between younger years and older, and the few awkward sentences, but I really liked the dynamics. It didn't really occur to me that they would have much in common, but this really brought that to light. Also, that being different, would compliment each other. As morbid as it sounds, I would have liked to hear how Remus would have dealt (or not dealt) with Sirius' death.
Really, great job for a uniquely written story!
This review is for team Gold in review tag :)

Author's Response: Hi Heather!

Wow, it's cool that this was your first Wolfstar, and I'm glad that you mostly enjoyed reading it!

The nonlinear time in this story can definitely be difficult for some people, but it's excellent that you were able to find good in this story despite struggling a bit :)

Like I told a different reviewer, I feel that anything POA and beyond was outside the scope of this project, especially because I was trying to sort of mirror the story being told in the song (Young God). However, there are a lot of really excellent Wolfstar fics out there that are about Remus dealing with Sirius' death!

Thank you for the review!

-Kayla


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Review #9, by mymischiefmanaged and we will stumble through heaven

9th January 2016:
Hi Kayla, here for our review swap :)

Ohmygosh I love this so much. Just...everything about it is wonderful and heartbreaking and beautiful.

I was a little bit confused at the beginning by the time jumps. I think it's a really effective way of telling Remus's story, but it took me a little while to get used to. Once I figured out it wasn't chronological it was perfect though :)

You've used beautiful imagery the whole way through this. All of your language brings out Remus's angst and emotions. Some of my favourite lines:
"But instead of imploding, his universe expands."
"Sirius’ eyes are sterling silver and he looks at Remus like he’s made of gold."
"The betrayal is still too fresh, sharp in his mouth like blood."

You've shown so many different sides to Remus and Sirius's relationship, and you've developed both of them into very real, flawed but wonderful people. I'm genuinely so impressed by your ability to tell pretty much a lifetime in so few words.

I would have loved to see a moment post Prisoner of Azkaban, when Remus knows Sirius is innocent, but at the same time I think your ending works beautifully. The stark juxtaposition between adult Remus's whole world having fallen apart, and 11-year-old Remus' hope and delight at his new friends is upsetting but very accurate. His life isn't fair and you've shown that.

Wonderful wonderful story. I hope this review isn't too rambly. Adding this to my favourites now :)

Emma xx

Author's Response: Hi, Emma!

I'm sorry that you were confused by the time jumps initially, but I'm really glad you were able to figure it out and enjoy the story! There have definitely been mixed reactions to the format, and I can certainly see how it would be hard to follow.

Aw, I'm so happy and flattered that you were impressed by my story, and what you said about Remus and Sirius as characters basically made my day!

A couple of people have said that they would like to see more scenes that take place later in Remus and Sirius' timeline, and I did consider writing scenes like that when I was working on this, but ultimately I feel that anything post-POA is beyond the scope of this project, especially since I was trying to sort of mirror the story told in the song (Young God). So I'm glad that the ending I have worked for you anyway!

I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, and thank you so much for your lovely review!

-Kayla


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Review #10, by alicia and anne and we will stumble through heaven

4th January 2016:
Kayla! I am here to bestow you with reviews because you are my victim! :D I hope that you enjoy my reviews, I'm aiming to read and review everything that you've written (I've already done one a while ago). So, let's get started!! (don't be alarmed if there's a gap between the reviews, I need to sleep in a minute haha)

Yes! You write Sirius and he is my main man! I am going to love all of these stories, and I know it already.

I absolutely love your face claims, they are so perfect!! Perfect Chapter image and banner!

That is a perfect way to begin the story. Such a fantastic line that drags me in. :D

I love the way that you write them all together and their friendship. And how you've said that Sirius doesn't feel like the only monster.

What can I even start to say about how you've written Sirius and Remus together? Their thought processes, the way that Remus thinks about him and the way he feels coming through.

Can we talk about this part? "Sirius plays hard and fast with his own safety, and Remus is losing count of the times he’s returned from missions bloodied or bruised or nursing curse wounds, all of which he downplays, as though he’s reveling in the pain and doesn’t want anyone to stop it. Remus doesn’t want to believe that Sirius thinks he’s disposable, worthless, deserving of agony"
Are you trying to break me? I'm so sad! AND ALSO THAT PART WHERE REMUS COMES TO SEE HIM WHEN HE RUNS AWAY!!!
THERE'S PAIN! IT'S BEAUTIFUL AND IT'S PAINFUL!!

I LOVE THIS AND I HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS! BECAUSE THEY HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS!

YOU NEED TO ALWAYS WRITE SIRIUS AND REMUS!! YOU ARE THE QUEEN OF THEM! YOU ARE THE BEST WRITER OF THEM AND I NEED MORE! So much more! AND I HAVE CAPSLOCK AND EXCITEMENT!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO READ MORE OF YOUR SIRIUS STORIES!

If you couldn't tell... I absolutely love your story, and you! Stay fabulous and wonderful, and absolutely perfect!

Author's Response: Tammi! YOU ARE THE ONE WHO IS FABULOUS AND WONDERFUL AND ABSOLUTELY PERFECT! It's so amazing what you're doing, you're making so many people really happy without expecting anything in return! You're the best!

Oh, I'm really glad that you liked my banner and CI! I worked hard on them :D

The opening line is actually one of the opening lines of the song, but I thought that would be a really great starting point for this story! I'm happy you agree!

Your capslock and excitement made me grin so much when I was reading this review! Thank you so much! And don't worry, I'm planning to keep writing Sirius and Remus ;D

I'm really happy that you enjoyed my story, and thank you so much for this loveley review!

-Kayla


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Review #11, by nott theodore and we will stumble through heaven

2nd January 2016:
Hi Kayla! I'm here for Team Gold in the Red vs. Gold Review Battle!

So I have to confess that I've actually had this story open in a tab for quite a few days, just waiting for time to sit and read and review it properly. Then when I saw realised you were still the last person in the Battle, I really couldn't resist. It's been far too long since I read any of your lovely writing (I still have to catch up with Breathe!) but I've heard so much about this that I had to stop by ♥

Anyway, I really loved this! You write Sirius so well - I know you've written about him a lot now, but you really understand his character and you capture that brilliantly in your writing so that it comes through in each of your stories. There's something really real about your Sirius, and while he's younger than we see him in the books, he's so recognisable. I feel like Remus really gets to see the vulnerable side of Sirius that he tries so hard to hide from people. It's kind of raw - there's so much pain and doubt there, and it's completely contrasted with the sort of persona Sirius adopts on an everyday basis and presents to other people.

I've only started reading any Remus/Sirius stories in the last few months, but each one that I've written has been so well done, and this was no exception. I could really understand why the two of them would be attracted to each other here, especially with their similarities, their hidden vulnerabilities, even if they try to act bravely and normally, and how much they mean to the other, as well.

I've already said that you write Sirius brilliantly, but your Remus is fantastic too. I felt so sorry for him here - the way that he wanted to be included, but he didn't feel like he deserved to be, at the start - and then the way that he gradually grew closer to the others but he still never really came to terms with the fact that him being a werewolf didn't make him a monster. I just wanted to give him a hug! But I loved the way that you wrote the growing feelings he had for Sirius and then the exciting thrill and the fleeting happiness that he felt when he and Sirius came together.

The opening and closing sections, with the pranks and mischief making and the way that shaped so much of their experiences, were so great. I really liked the way that you incorporated the Marauders into the story (and the brief mentions of James and Peter were great too, although they didn't appear as much) and sort of bookmarked the story with the childish thrill and excitement of their pranks. It kind of gave us this happiness and created this sense of wistful nostalgia for what they once had, and left them in our memory like that.

As far as a little bit of CC goes, I did notice a typo here: "Sirius keeps eying Remus when he thinks he’s not looking" - this should be 'eyeing'
I really enjoyed the structure of this, too (I'm a sucker for non-linear stories), but the only thing that I'd say is that it got a little bit confusing at times, since the breaks weren't always completely obvious, if that makes sense? I think if you could make the breaks a little bit clearer, it would really help this flow a bit better.

I really loved this, though, and you've done a fantastic job with this piece - thank you for sharing it! ♥

Sian :)

Author's Response: Sian! Thank you so much for the lovely review, you're always so sweet!

i'm so glad that you like my Sirius ;~; It honestly makes my day every single time someone tells me that they find him real or recognizable, so thank you! As for Remus, I feel a lot less secure in writing him, so I'm very very happy and excited that people liked him in this!

When I was writing this, I was trying to give it the same "vibe" as the story it's based on. I think "wistful nostalgia" is kind of part of what that vibe is, if that makes sense? So it's really good to hear that that sort of feeling came through for you.

Drat, I forgot to change eying to eyeing when I edited this a few days ago... next time! I did try to make the breaks clearer though :)

Really happy that you enjoyed reading this, and thanks so much again for the wonderful review!

-Kayla


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Review #12, by The Basilisk and we will stumble through heaven

29th December 2015:
Hello there! I was getting bored down in my chamber and decided to go for a ssslither when I ssstumbled across this lovely gem and I couldn't help but ssstay for a quick read.

I like how this begins with a young Remus. Afraid of his only friends finding out what he truly is. But still willing to risk losing it all by partaking in their friendship and pranks. I also really like this line in particular "They sit upon a throne built of madcap ideas and the stars in their eyes. They are the kings of the world." Your style and narrative is so poetic to read, I know you were experimenting with it but I really like how it turned out.

Oh, it's so sweet that Sirius, James, and Peter accept Remus when they do find out the truth! I love that they don't see him any differently and even care for him when he's stuck in bed. I love that he wakes up to find extra blankets and chocolate and books (because he's Remus and he loves books). I can't wait to see how his relationship with Sirius progresses though throughout the years. Although it's very sad that Remus doesn't think their friendship will make him whole in the end. I do not want Remus to be forever broken.

Oh, poor Sirius. To be so uncaring of his own life! He doesn't even see what his death would do to his friends if they were to lose him! It's heartbreaking to even think about! I did love the "Run!" bit though, reminds me of a certain crazy story I once found some muggle Hufflepuffs discussing one day about a Madman in a blue box, sounded very interesting.

I'm really enjoying all the similies and metaphors in the way Remus and Sirius view each other. They clearly view each other in the highest regards. Sirius looking at Remus like he's made of gold and Remus looking at Sirius as if he's the sun. It's all so heartwarming and endearing. Clearly there's more to their friendship than what meets the eyes.

I adored the bit where Sirius comes back early from dinner to be with Remus! I thought that was oh so cute and well done. It's awkward and not over the top for thirteen year old boys, but still just utterly adorable.

I'm very curious about what the next bit is about though. How did Sirius betray Remus? How did he hurt him? I really want to know. Hopefully their friendship will make it through whatever it is. I'd hate to see the two of them not be friends, they seem to understand each other better than anyone else can. I'm guessing the betrayal must be about what happened with Snape at the Whomping Willow...

I'm getting a little more confused as this story progresses, mainly because it sounds like and Remus had sex before they had their first kiss, which seems odd... but I like how Remus is so nervous about it, that's very cute of him.

Wait... are we going back and forth in time? How am I just noticing this?

I love the ending though! And how it's a repeat of before but the roles are reversed and now it's Sirius grabbing Remus and telling him to run and Remus laughing!

This was a very cute one-shot! So glad I stopped by to read it! You really did a wonderful job writing this story!

Propsss to you! Hope you have a wonderful New Year's!

Hiss hiss,
-The Basilisk

Author's Response: Hello there, Basilisk #2!

I'm sorry that there seems to have been some confusion about the progression of the story. Some people have had problems with the non-linear format and others have loved it. I'm trying to figure out how to clear things up without changing the story. I'm very glad that you seem to have mostly enjoyed reading this despite the confusion, though. (And yes, you were correct with your guess - the betrayal part was re: Snape and the Whomping Willow).

I'm very glad that, although you struggled a bit with the nonlinear format, you enjoyed the overall style of the narrative. Both of those things (style and format) were new to me, so it's really wonderful to know that you enjoyed one of them :)

Thank you for the lovely review!

-Kayla


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Review #13, by TreacleTart and we will stumble through heaven

21st December 2015:
Hey Kayla!

As soon as I saw that you posted this, I meant to come and review it, but life unfortunately had other plans and has kept me just insanely busy the past few weeks. But now I'm here and have a bit of time to write you the proper review that this story deserves.

You already know that I love the way you write. (particularly when it comes to Sirius) You also know that I've been dying to see you take a stab at writing Remus and I have to tell you I'm beyond thrilled that you've finally gone and done it! And spectacularly too. I knew it would be magnificent!

*Deep breath*

Where to start?

The format of this story was really unique. I loved that you showed them growing up and then once they hit a certain point, it sort of reversed in time. I've only ever seen a few stories written that way and I think that's because it's really tricky to do. Of course, you handled it like a champ.

While I think you write Sirius beautifully and you really get all of his complications, you seem to know Remus inside and out. Seriously, your characterization of him was heartbreaking, gut wrenching, haunting, beautiful, and just so fitting of who he was in cannon. Truly perfection on the characterization.

I also really loved the moments that you chose to highlight. There were moments of happiness and others of sadness, but they all showed who he was at his core. Really great work.

I only have one very minor note of cc, so here it goes.

The story begins going forward in time and then in the middle switches to go backwards. I love that concept, but did find myself a little bit confused around the midway point. I'm not actually sure that there's any better way to have done it, but it was confusing watching them hook up, then the tender first kiss. I think it took me about 3 memory flashes before I realized that it had started going backwards.

All in all, the praise you've been getting for this is really well deserved. I know I say this every time I read one of your stories, but this really might be your best work yet. I love all of your writing, but Trapped and this story really showed a huge difference in writing style, word choice, and description.

Great job! And I hope you have the happiest of holidays because you so deserve them!

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: KAITLIN! Thank you so much for this absolutely lovely review! It means a lot to me.

I have more Remus-centric stuff in the works, so it's really a relief that people have liked the way I portrayed him in this story. It makes me feel a lot more confident about my upcoming project(s).

As for the format of the story, it wasn't exactly forward and then back - I was kind of jumping around from the get-go. I'm not sure how to clarify the progression within the story, so I think I'm just going to add a note at the beginning and separate the paragraphs more clearly. Hopefully this issue didn't detract too much from your enjoyment of the story.

I'm so happy that you liked this overall! It really means a lot to me that you've taken the time to read all my work and have enjoyed it. :D

Thanks again for the wonderful review!

-Kayla


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Review #14, by The Basilisk and we will stumble through heaven

20th December 2015:
Hiss, Hiss. Guess Who? The Basilisk, with a review.

Wow, this was ssso beautiful. I loved it. My cold snake-y heart is having a lot of feels right now. I've been trapped in this Chamber for over a 100 years and felt a decent amount of pain, but your story, it has ripped whatever remains of my heart.

The writing is so beautiful and amazing. If I could weep, I would.

Remus' characterisation is just perfect. I love the relationship he shares with Sirius. His pain and frustration at his own condition, thinking he's a monster is so well-written. And the disjointed writing style is magnificent. It fits the story theme perfectly.

Some moments really stood out to me. Like when Sirius and Remus first kiss (they're seventeen when it happens), when Sirius visits Remus in the hospital wing, when Remus confronts him after his return, and the ending bit. Such phenomenal writing. Across my one year worth of travelling, this is truly one of the best fics I've encountered.

What a pleasure to have read thisss. The writing is flawless. Great descriptions, amazing use of words, superb characterisation, and beautiful concept. Loved it so much. Great job!

10/10
Hiss Hiss
The Basilisk

Author's Response: Ah, hello there Basilisk! I would absolutely love to know which of the lovely Slytherins left me this awesome review!

I've always been nervous about writing Remus and felt I didn't have as strong a grasp on his character as I did on Sirius', so I'm very happy to hear that you thought I wrote him well here.

This review really made my day when I got it and I'm sorry I didn't respond sooner! I'm so glad that you liked my story, and thank you for your lovely comments!

-Kayla


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Review #15, by Unicorn_Charm and we will stumble through heaven

20th December 2015:
Kayla, oh my goodness. I'm completely blown away by this. It's beautiful. So, so beautiful. I'm unbelievably, completely and totally in love with every last word that you've written here. It's amazing.

This whole thing read to me as if Remus was sitting and just recalling different moments with Sirius. Maybe after Sirius died? Or maybe during those lonely years before he went back to Hogwarts to teach? Or possibly while he was teaching and Sirius was on the run. It was just a perfect representation of how your mind can wander from memory to memory when you're thinking of someone. It was brilliantly and spectacularly done.

There was an melancholic overtone that came across so strongly throughout the entire piece that I felt was just so fitting for Remus' voice. I felt everything that he was feeling the entire time. Again, so remarkably done.

My favorite part of the whole thing was in the dorm room. When Remus was sick before the full moon and Sirius came in to check on him. I feared up when he questioned if monsters went to heaven. Then even more when Sirius told him that he was human in that moment. It was such a touching moment for them both. I completely adored it to bits.

I love how you write their relationship. It's not all fluff and flowers, there are real problems there. Complications due to the war or other factors that I think would have most certainly been there. I just want to squeeze them both, protect them and force them to be happy. But sadly I can't. :(

I really don't even know what else I can say about this. It was amazing, Kayla. Your writing is just stunning and flows so beautifully, it's breathtaking. I don't know why you were nervous about posting this. You have no reason to be, because it's basically perfect.

Such an great job on this, dear. I love it so, so, so much! Thank you for writing such a beautiful piece of art. It was amazing. ♥

Tons of love and hugs,
Meg

Author's Response: Meg *heart eyes* I've put off answering this review for so long because it's so nice that I don't even know what to say! You are so lovely!

I think I was mostly imagining this as Remus looking back sometime during the years Sirius was in Azkaban. I didn't really think about that aspect too much though, I wanted to leave it pretty open to interpretation.

I've never really tried writing in Remus' voice before this, and I was always super nervous about it... I'm so glad you liked my portrayal of him.

Don't get me wrong, I love to read (and even write!) some good Wolfstar fluff. But you're so right that there were real problems in their relationship due to multiple factors. :( Both of them were sort of forced to grow up too fast (as were James, Lily, etc - but with these two it wasn't only because of the war, there were other reasons (abuse and lycanthropy, respectively)). Gah! It all gets to me so much! :(

Anyways, thank you SO much for all your unbelievably sweet words ;~; you're wonderful!

Love and hugs right back at you!

-Kayla


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Review #16, by cherry_pop94 and we will stumble through heaven

19th December 2015:
Hello!

Oh god this is beautiful. It's just incredible.

Young God is a great choice for the song. I could hear the dramatic melody playing in my head as I read this. 'The two of us are just young gods.' It fits perfectly with this and you've managed to sneak some subtle references in there too. Like when Remus is talking about Elysium - "And if you wanna go to heaven you should..." (You know the rest haha). And when he's talking about Sirius's edges - "Don't get caught on my edges."

The non-linear format of this works beautifully. Sometimes it can be confusing to have a non-linear timeline, especially when there's nothing to denote time changes like in this, but I think the confusion adds to the story. I start a section not knowing what time period it will be, not knowing if Sirius and Remus will be happy or not at this point. It builds suspense for me. It makes it all the more impactful when I reflect on the story at the end. I realize at the end that my knowledge of Sirius and Remus through the ages is jumbled and confused and I'm certain that's what Remus's actual emotions are like.

The continued references to heaven, hell, and monsters in this are wonderfully done. Like I said early, it perfectly references the song, but it also captures Wolfstar so well. To Remus, especially when they first meet and he calls Sirius regal, Sirius is a god. He is beautiful and strong. Later he takes Remus to Elysium, he's still a god. And Remus sees himself as a monster, he thinks he's going to hell and believes he's dying. But after James and Lily die, Sirius is the monster and he's the one going to hell, but that means Remus will never find Elysium again.

Chosing to end on such a happy moment was an interesting choice too. They're running together and laughing and happy. It mirrors the scene when they're on an Order mission and they run and Sirius laughs. That's a brilliant comparison to draw because its the same thing happening - Sirius and Remus running away from something hand in hand, but the context is so vastly different. Yet Remus is so happy in borth just to be there with Sirius.

Another thing I found wonderful was your use of rude words. A weird thing to notice, but I just want to say how well your word choice works with the song lyrics. Your swearing never sounds rude or distasteful, it is perfectly in line with the narrative flow. Again when the Elysium line, I wanted to cry at how beautiful that line was. It's my favourite quote in all this.

So sorry for this very long, very rambly review. I can barely get coherent thoughts together, I just absolutely adore this so much! I've written a one shot based on a Halsey song as well, there's just something very inspiring about her words, don't you think? Anyway, I wrote one called 'Colors' if you want to check it out :)

So, amazing job! I'm definitely favourting this one!

Stefanie

Author's Response: Stephanie, thank you so much for this amazing review! I honestly smiled so much reading this.

I'm so happy that you think I pulled the non-linear format off, because I definitely agree that it can get super confusing. To hear that you think it enhanced this particular story is very reassuring.

The whole reason I wrote this story was that every time I listened to the song it made me think of Wolfstar, so it's great to know that you thought the story worked with the song and the pairing :)

The mirroring of the running scenes was very intentional, and was meant to reflect the "we'll be running, running, running" refrain in the song (and how it repeats after each verse, and the two verses have such different moods/vibes). I hope that explanation makes sense haha.

Aw, I'm so happy that you liked the Elysium line! I'm very proud of it, honestly. And I'm happy that you liked my swearing ;)

Don't apologize for this review at all! It made me so happy and is really lovely. Thank you so much!

-Kayla

P.S. I will definitely check out your story sometime!


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Review #17, by bigblackdog and we will stumble through heaven

19th December 2015:
KAYLA!

YOU ARE THE BELOVED SOVEREIGN OF WOLFSTAR

i don't ever want it to end! wah, i can't even write real words because the refrain in my head right now is just like, wordless longing.


let's talk about this style a little bit:
"Sirius is a new Aphrodite, fallen from the heavens to lounge on Remus’ couch"
"Sirius’ eyes are sterling silver and he looks at Remus like he’s made of gold"

ok- i'm trying to stop myself from quoting more lines, but gaaah- the part where Sirius wipes Remus' tears with his sleeve, and the order mission and Sirius' recklessness, and the shaking hands during their first kiss!

you mention in your author's note that you're nervous about this new style but i think you pulled it off flawlessly. there's just enough poetry, and all of it feels necessary (not just flowery). and i listened to that halsey song! the quality of this style really fits with the song, they're both sort of disjointedly hypnotic, which really serves the content of your story. i mean disjointed in the best way- like it's perfect because there's so much in this story about feeling broken and it's reflected in the structure of the story in the way you rearranged the timeline of these snippets.

sigh, this definitely a new favorite! thanks so much for sharing it!

elise

Author's Response: ELISE!

Oh, I'm so happy that you enjoyed this story and that you thought I pulled the style off. I really have been unsure about it, so that's so wonderful to hear! I was especially concerned that the "vibe" of the story didn't match the vibe of the song, so it's such a relief to hear that you thought the song fit with the story.

This is such a lovely review, thank you so much!

-Kayla


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