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149 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ABlack A Night In The Limelight

8th April 2017:
Harry nervous about a speech? One would think after facing a dragon and defeating Voldemort that a little speech would be easy peasy. It’s good to see he has human flaws.

It’s also good to see the effect the girls have on the guys. They’d have to be blind not to have. It would have been nice if there was more showing than telling here, though. Having Hermione self-consciously tuck a stray curl behind her ear or Ginny straighten one of the spaghetti straps on her shoulder would have done the trick, rather than big blocks of description devoid of action. Alternating between the two would make it more interesting.

There were also a few overly long paragraphs, particularly the speeches. Breaking these down into smaller chunks would make it easier on the reader and make the flow more natural. Also, interspersing physical motion, like perhaps Harry nervously touching the buttons on his suit or running a hand through his hair as he spoke.

I do like that at the end of the evening, they opted for cocoa and tarts. Soothing and sweet, and as Remus would have reminded Harry, chocolate makes you feel better. Wish you would have included a little of the family stories, but it was cute that Harry and Ginny fell asleep like that.

Author's Response: Hello ABlack! Thanks for reviewing!!

I've tried to make Harry as human as possible, not some superman figure. Character flaws are a fact of life.

Thanks for the critique about mixing some action (especially the small, personal details) with my descriptions. I will take that to heart!!

Also, duly noted about the long speeches and the previous mixing of action in with those.

I would have loved to add some family details, but I didn't want to drag the chapter out too long...plus, you will find more of those later and in the sequel!! (Teaser!!)

Again, thanks for taking the time to review!!!


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Review #2, by ABlack Harry's Emotional Rollercoaster

8th April 2017:
You deftly handled that first part! Just enough without going into too much detail. Sweetly done! The only thing I would caution would be breaking the first paragraph when you switch to Harry. Initially the paragraph was focused on Ginny so the switch was offsetting.

Same with next two long paragraphs. You did a great job describing what each was doing or feeling, but I think it would have flowed better if it hadn’t been bunched up in one (or two) massive blocks.

I did love the part afterwards, how Ginny blushed when Harry joined her. Very nice! And the euphemisms? *chuckles* Funny and natural they would engage in such banter

And of course Arthur would have figured out what was going on! I had a laugh at this line: ‘So, when the time comes for you to ask me for my daughter’s hand in marriage, I will gladly say yes.” He’s a great father and you did so well keeping him in character with the battery-powered nose hair trimmer. Thank Merlin it wasn’t something completely embarrassing like, say, a monthly feminine product.

I like this relationship between Kreacher and Harry, particularly when Kreacher talks about Dobby. It was quite touching, but I’m curious as to how Kreacher would know what Dobby said before he died.

Altogether, good work here.

Author's Response: Hello again, ABlack!

I'm glad you liked the first part. I will take it under advisement and look at editing my big blocks. I think that my formatting had a role in some of those big blocks as I've had others mention the same thing. When I looked back at my original, it wasn't like that. Thanks for pointing those out!

Yes, Arthur is not as oblivious as everyone thinks...at least in MY mind he isn't! :)

Well, I think I cover some of the Kreacher/ House Elf stuff in other chapters...maybe you should read the whole story? ;D

Again, thanks for the critiques, comments and Kudos!! Keep 'em coming!!



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Review #3, by adluvshp Harry's Emotional Rollercoaster

8th April 2017:
Aww, the progression of Ginny and Harry's relationship was really sweet. I think you wrote it in a very good manner as such scenes can be tricky to handle. It had the right amount of detail and yet wasn't too graphic. At the same time, as their first time, it was also a little awkward and yet they both enjoyed it and basked in its glow. They are content with each other and that really came through which was great. Kreacher really knows what's up too haha but I guess house-elves have a bond with their masters to know of important events xP
The visit to the Weasleys after that was fun. Arthur knew what happened, that is so mortifying, poor harry! And what an embarassing conversation to have. What I found quite interesting was your take on the activity, and how you had both of them cast the spells - if only muggle life was as easy hahaha xD
And yay for girl talk. I think it is really healthy and much needed especially after something big like this so glad that Ginny and Hermione spent a good time. I love how their friendship is also deep and it's not the trio but the quartet that is together. Great going!

Author's Response: Thanks, adluvshp!

I try to be tasteful in those personal scenes. The reason I write them is to attempt to portray them as whole persons and, hopefully, present a more realistic portrayal of their characters. Glad you liked it.

In the same vein, I've tried to bring Hermione and Ginny closer, thus cementing the "Golden Quartet" motif.

Thanks for the review!!


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Review #4, by adluvshp Harry's Startling Surprise

8th April 2017:
Ooh so this was an interesting chapter and I loved how fleur was the one guiding harry through everything. You got her accent and dialogue down pretty well, good work there. Harry's nervousness and confusion were spot on, totally understandable, I would feel similarly overwhlemed if i was in his place. The whole idea of investment portfolios is surely very interesting and unique, and especially in terms of how you have merged the magical and muggle ideas in there. Even having wizards invest in both magical and muggle ventures, now that is something creative and practical and believable too! Poor Harry though, he really is lost, it makes sense that he has no idea how to manage anything, money or property or investments, and of course lovely Fleur understands. The whole goblin system and the linking of the vaults is another little detailed addition that works to add to the credibility of this world you have created or built upon so i like that too. And yay Harry buying his new broomstick for the team purposes - now that's fun! Wouldn't it have been nicer if he had taken Ron or someone along though? Regardless, the shopkeeper's interaction was also nicely done there and I liked the note this chapter ended on - it's all going well!

Author's Response: Hey again, adluvshp!

Again, thanks fir the review!

As I mentioned, I've tried to portray the characters as humanly as possible. Harry's befuddlement his new-found wealth and responsibility is just such a portrayal.

I'm glad you like the little details of wizarding banking...again, trying to be a s real as possible - little details do that.

Please read all of my chapters - you will find why Harry went to the Quidditch shop by himself in earlier chapters! :D

Keep those reviews coming!


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Review #5, by Unicorn_Charm First Day On The Job

8th April 2017:
CTF Review!

”“Merlin’s saggy left….”
“Hermione Granger…were you just going to use profanity?”
“Oh, stuff it, Ron.”


We’re barely into this chapter and already I'm dying. You write Ron and Hermione so well together. I can easily seeing an exchange with them going exactly like that.

Yeah I didn't even think that it's been a long time since Harry really played Quidditch, so I'm sure that it would have been rough on him while picking it back up. Glad to see Oliver still lets him have it hahaha.

Oh boy hahaha, Ron, always the wordsmith. XD Merlin’s aching back! I feel like Grawp used me for a punching bag. How did you hold up, Harry?” But yeah, it's been a while for Ron, too. The poor boys.

Aw Harry bought Ginny and Ron new brooms! I love it! :)

I'm cracking up. Of course Hermione would still want to study, even after she'd already had a job. That's our Hermione though. The constant student.

”I have no desire to be Minister of Magic.” Sure you don't, Hermione.

That had to be hard on Harry, not being able to see Ginny. Especially when you think of them being separated during the time he was hunting Horcruxes. It must be tough for both of them to be apart, as I'm sure it opens old wounds.

This! This is my favorite line so far! ”I believe you have now graduated to the emotional range of a soup ladle, Ron! I’m so proud of you!” I can't stop laughing.

This was a nice chapter. I know you said it was a filler, but it was nice to see how their days unfolded. And to see that the three of them are still so close and great friends to one another. It was a sweet chapter.

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hey, Meg!! Nice to see you!! Thanks for dropping i and reviewing!!

Well, can't you just imagine the conversations the Golden Quartet would have living in the same house? And the Golden Trio was on the run for a year together...I imagine they're fairly comfortable with each other, by then.

I'm glad you liked the filler - I try to keep even the fillers entertaining!!


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Review #6, by ABlack Harry's Startling Surprise

8th April 2017:
CTF

I love how you have Harry a little off-balance here when it comes to finances. Yes, his parents left him a fortune, but I doubt Aunt Petunia did much showing him how to handle anything as mundane as banking or properties (I know some adults that still have issues with those subjects). More importantly, it just makes sense that Harry would be overwhelmed with it all. You see this happen all the time in sports when someone gets their first big contract. So it’s reasonable, and even a little fun, to see Harry at a bit dazed with it all.

You captured Fleur quite well, particularly her bits of dialog. It was easy to hear her French accent as I read through that section and you kept her true to her character. That Harry thought to pay for her services was perfect.

I’m guessing that Harry is buying those two brooms for Ginny and Ron? Makes sense and is true to how loyal and generous he is. From the very first trip on the Hogwarts Express, he was bought all that food for Ron and him to eat.

As for Rita Skeeter, I like how Harry is having ideas about using her and her writing to his benefit. Very Slytherin (and grown up) of him! Tricky, but manageable.

Some of the paragraphs were a bit long and could have been broken into smaller chunks, but overall this was a solid chapter. Well done!

Author's Response: Hey, ABlack! Thanks for returning!

Your insight into the whole professional sports/ first contract is spot on. That's exactly what I had in mind when i came up with the idea.

You are correct with the broom purchases. Please, read my whole story and you'll see how all of this ties in together...especially with Rita!

Thanks again for the review! Hope to see more from you soon!


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Review #7, by adluvshp First Day On The Job

8th April 2017:
Aw Ron suggesting Hermione how to do stuff is so cute. What would she do without him really, sometimes she forgets she is a witch. Ginny, Ron and Harry all need to balance their schedules! Personally, Hermione would be a great Minister for Magic, much better than some lame people they have had like Fudge and Scrimgeour really. She is so passionate for her causes too - so I was really pleased that you included that bit of conversation even if it was meant as a joke and she says she has no desire to be minister as of now! It's sad about Harry and Ginny though, they will be seeing so less of each other - it will be like a long distance relationship, but then you write them so well and they fit so perfectly, am sure they will work things out! The whole "emotions" dialogue was the best - it reminded me of the teaspoon conversation between ron and hermione in order of the phoenix, you really draw amazing parallels and make me smile xD It's cute how Ron and Harry are starting to grow up and try to figure out the women in their lives and be good men to them. It's really refreshing to read a light fic overall about how their lives have progressed and changed and how things are going. I liked the chapter despite it being a filler of sorts! Lots of nice little details that add to the main narrative!

Author's Response: Hi adluvshp! Back again, I see!

I like to add bits in my story about how Hermione and Harry sometimes "forget" that they're witches and wizards. It seems logical to me.

I really liked writing the "emotions" dialogue, as you so aptly and nicely put it. It all seems logical and progressive to me...Harry is growing up and is 'free' from his destiny - he, naturally, would have to come to terms with his past and his future at some point. I'm glad you liked it!

Hope to hear more from you soon!


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Review #8, by Unicorn_Charm Seamus Lends A Helping Hand...And Hammer.

8th April 2017:
CTF Review!

The magical batteries are just brilliant! It's such an intriguing idea, where on earth did you come up with that? And to think that for George it all stemmed from Harry’s birthday party when that quip was made about electricity in a can. Wow George is truly amazing and so crazily brilliant.

I love this idea of Seamus being some sort of magical construction guy. I can totally see him being the sort to work with his hands (or wand would be more accurate for wizards, but you know what I mean). That and it's always nice to have someone you trust doing work like that for you. Like my father’s best friend (basically brother) has done so much work on my house for me, and it makes me feel secure, because I've known him my whole life, and I know that he'd do a good job for me. Just like Harry would feel about Seamus.

Ah well there you go, his father was in construction, too. Now that makes a lot more sense as to why Seamus would go into that profession.

The special Gryffindor discount hahah. Another benefit of having someone you know do work for you. ;)

Gosh Harry is just so good with Teddy! I love seeing these little scenes of them together! It makes my heart melt.

And can I say how thrilled I am to see Kreacher in this story, and to see that he's still loyal to Harry, and his friends, too! Kreacher is one of my favorite characters. It's actually my cat’s name!

”It is kinda scary, isn’t it? Growing up, I mean?” Truer words were never spoken, Ginny.

Oh my god, I'm literally laughing out loud at this, because I can SO picture Ginny doing this! ”Novel idea, brother! See you two in the morning!” cried Ginny as she jumped up, grabbed Harry by the hand and headed upstairs. Too, too funny! XD

Aww I feel bad for Harry and Ginny at the end here. :( But we all know that their love is strong, and even though they may not see each other for a while, they'll get through it.

Another good chapter! Can't wait to read this in order hahaha!

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hey, Meg!

I can't wait for you to read this story in order, too!

I was trying to figure out how Harry would "revolutionize" the Auror department later in his life. Bringing a little Muggle Tech into it was one of my ideas and the batteries fit in nicely.

Love my "Teddy moments"! You'll see more of them later! (Hint, hint!)

Thanks for reviewing...hope to see more!


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Review #9, by adluvshp Seamus Lends A Helping Hand...And Hammer.

8th April 2017:
Renovation time! It can be both fun and a pain, and I think you showed that pretty accurately. Seamus having a good craftsmanship came as a surprise but it's good he helped out with the extension charms and stuff. It takes a lot of thinking to write a chapter like this and it's nice you have taken what jkr wrote and built upon that in terms of the spells and all. I really liked the prototype fred and george built and how you used it to explain the bridging between muggle technology and magical devices. Good concept and nice way of expressing it. Weasley twins putting their creative brains to use! Also, kudos on keeping Seamus in character, the way you write his dialogue is perfect and reminds me of his canon self.

Friday night came quickly. Harry, with Teddy on his shoulders, was waiting for Ginny outside the Holyhead facilities when she came through the gate. -- aww the image of this is so cute, little Teddy sitting on his godfather's shoulders. The whole idea of magical cells was super cool too and I am glad Ginny and Fleur and all are going to be working on the project - definitely some interesting ideas there.
Oh and also I can't believe Ginny called Harry "tiger" haha. And yeah of course they will be okay, am sure things will work out for the best - really sweet moments there, and good writing. Kudos.

Author's Response: Hello, adluvshp! Thanks for returning to my story!

I always liked Seamus, so I tried to build on what canon said (or didn't say) about his background. He became a great ally to Harry, so I thought I would add him in the story. I'm glad you liked what i did with him!

Aha! Caught you! It was George , alone, who came up with the magical battery idea...Fred is, sadly, no longer with us, per canon. Please read both of my stories, in sequential order...I think you'll like what I did with George, especially in the second story!!

I love writing what I call "Teddy Moments"! I've tried to expound on that relationship, knowing how Harry would feel about "family"...especially his orphaned god-son!

Thanks for the read and review. I hope to see more from you!!!


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Review #10, by Unicorn_Charm Final Matches

8th April 2017:
CTF Review!

Oh my god, I can't even handle the fact that Teddy morphed his features to look just like Harry. I am a puddle of goo just thinking about him doing that! It's so clear that he loves his godfather.

Oh that was very sneaky of Harry to have hidden the Snitch like that. He will have to be careful if he tries that again, since he almost was caught. A little Slytherin-y of Harry there. ;) But not quite, a Slytherin would realize they'd still have to appear to be looking for it haha.

I could totally see Oliver screaming at the refs, too. He hasn't changed much. XD

Oh and now we’re on to Ginny’s match. That had to be difficult for her, being on another team than Harry and her brother. I'm sure that's led to some interesting discussions at dinner haha.

But you write quidditch really well. It's very exciting and I totally find myself getting caught up in the matches!

”Pull your head out of your arses, Harpies! We’re not going down like this! Pull it together! NOW!” Oh that Weasley temper. You've got that down pat.

Oh wow! Harry and Ginny’s teams both won! But Harry’s team is ahead by 10 points This is getting exciting. :) I wonder how Ron’s team will do!

What an action packed chapter. Awesome job!

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hey, Meg!! Love to hear from you again!!

Ah...my "Teddy Moments"...seems everyone loves a little Teddy time! :)

Although it's hard writing about a fictitious sport, I really love doing those scenes! I try to see them in my mind, like a movie and then write what I see.

Yeah...Ginny is fun to write when she's miffed!!

I hope you read the story all the way through, in order...I think you'll really like the earlier matches!!

Thanks again for the review!! Hope to see more from you!!


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Review #11, by adluvshp Final Matches

8th April 2017:
Aww Teddy is so adorable - yes Teddy Hawie will win haha. Harry is really lucky and blessed that his family and loved ones are so supportive of him. I wonder how video recorders can work in the Quidditch pitch though, doesn't the magical energy interfere with the electronic device (or the other way around)? But then I suppose that by this time they have learned to make things work.

You wrote the match quite well. It was quick and easy to read and not too long that it would get boring. Harry made a record of 45 seconds woohoo! And of course, gotta love Oliver Wood, am glad he was a part of the chapter!

Ginny's nervousness and anticipation and excitement all at once mixed up feelings totally made sense. I would feel like that too if I was in her place. You really got her character and emotions across well here! All of them playing Quidditch can of course be nerve-wracking and a little crazy but it works out fine in the end so yay!

I am not a huge fan of statistics and don't understand them all that well so I am not too happy that the chapter ended on that note with the statistics - would have been nicer if it was finished with a scene or a dialogue or a thought, but that is my personal opinion. Overall though, it was a good chapter with lots of energy and fast pacing and I really got into it while reading!

Author's Response: Hey, adluvshp!!

Again...love my Teddy Moments!!

In earlier chapters I explain how the magical cells work, so there's no magic interference. Please read this story through from front to back...I think you'll really like the details I throw in!!!

I'm sorry you weren't thrilled with the stats, but I added them for the hard-core Quidditch readers. Can't leave out the hard-core fans!!

I'm glad you like the action and pace of the chapter and I await more excellent reviews from you!!


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Review #12, by Unicorn_Charm The Afterparty

8th April 2017:
CTF Review!

Aww this chapter was so sweet! I swear I had a tear in my eye when Harry received the owl from Molly and Arthur. :( And it’s Hedwig's cousin!? That is just the most adorable and heartbreaking thing ever!

It's so Harry to have given them all gifts on his own birthday haha. But he was incredibly thoughtful. Ron had probably never owned anything that new and nice in his life, or Ginny for that matter, so I'm sure that must have meant a great deal to him. And the fact that he immediately wore it cracked me up.

The part when they were asked what DCMG meant, and they all shouted, ”Don't call me Ginerva?” was really funny, too.

Oh and then when he gave Hermione her presents, and called her “Sis.” My heart! That was such an unbelievably sweet moment. I just loved seeing their bond like that there.

Hagrid’s gift was perfect, and I know he'll be super excited to spend time with the Dragons. And he'll get to see Norbert(a)! Awesome!

And now I know why Molly and Arthur had just returned from a trip to France, in that last chapter I reviewed. How thoughtful of Harry. That must have costed him a fortune haha.

The whole bit talking about Teddy was sweet and funny. With Ginny panicking thinking that Harry was going to propose at that moment hahaha. And then hoping Teddy didn't interrupt their snogging. XD

I love the way you've written the relationship between them all - the Weasleys, Harry and the extended family. It's all very sweet and true to what we've seen in canon. I definitely want to properly read this story when CTF is over. :)

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hey, meg! Thanks for returning!

I would LOVE for you to read this story (and my sequel, also) all the way through! I think you will really love it!!

I just thought, "That's just what Harry would do." when I wrote about his presents to everyone. It's just "Harry"!

Yes, I really enjoyed adding the bit with Ginny thinking Harry was going to propose! It's so Ginny!

Love hearing from you...hope I see more!! :D



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Review #13, by adluvshp The Afterparty

8th April 2017:
The return of the famous beaded handbag! I loved it in the
deathly hallows so I am really glad you brought it in here.
That moment was so adorable when Harry got it and
everyone was amused, but then yay presents! It was very
sweet of him to show appreciation for everyone - it is so like
Harry, and I liked you showed that.

Lightening in a bolt or Calamity in a can hahaha that was so
fun. It sounded so authentic. The weasley twins never fail to
crack me up and you got them down really well. The ending
segment between Ginny and Harry was really sweet and as
always their romance makes me smile. The earring and the
inscription was beautiful. Your dialogues overall were very
much in character for the people too, like I liked how Molly
and Arthur got the vacation they wanted, and stuff. Oh and
Hagrid! I loved his inclusion in there, it's so great that you
had him because so many people forget to include him in
post-war stories. And that Hermione and Harry moment was
also very sweet, almost got me teary eyed the way he calls
her sis - it really puts their dynamic into perspective! All in
all lovely chapter, a very happy one, and I am glad things are
going well for the gang. Great work!

Author's Response: Love see you again, adluvshp!!

Ah yes...the beaded bag! You don't think Hermione would ever get rid of it, do you? LOL!

I've tried to stay in canon and true to the original characters as much as possible. With Harry and Hermione being besties, on the run for so long together and not romantically involved, I couldn't see Harry NOT having a brother/sister relationship with her. It only seemed natural.

Always love to hear from you...keep those reviews coming!!


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Review #14, by Unicorn_Charm Some Tricky Magic

8th April 2017:
Hey there! CTF Jailbreak review.

Ok so obviously I'm completely lost, coming in this story at chapter 17, but sadly that is the nature of CTF.

I'm really curious as to what these wards are that Bill and Hermione were talking about, and where they are. I thought perhaps the Potter's house they died in? But I could be wrong. I'll have to go back and read earlier chapters to find out for sure.

I have to admit, that part with Ron exclaiming that it's just like a cake had me laughing. Of course he would equate something to food. But what was funnier was that he was right, and Hermione thought he was brilliant for the analogy. From what I've read here, it seems that Harry, Ginny, Ron and Hermione's characters are all pretty spot on. Good job there. :)

Another thing I liked was when Bill teased Hermione about having limitations. Of course that would make someone feel better, because for most of the series, Hermione comes off as some sort of superwoman, so to see her struggle with something would actually be comforting I think.

I like how Ginny doesn't seem to care about Skeeter and what she says at all. Very true to her.

So Harry and Ron play quidditch too? That's interesting. Yeah, I'll have to go back and read earlier chapters for sure.

Ginny made me sad at the end when she was worrying about Harry. What it was like for him to be surrounded by people yet still feel so alone. I like the idea of them speaking to Kingsley about a Wizarding orphanage. I'm sure a lot of children did lose their parents in the war, and not all of them could end up as lucky as Teddy, with two families to love him.

This piqued my interest. I'll have to come back and read this properly.

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Howdy, Meg!!!

Yes, starting at chapter 17 would really be confusing! :)

The wards are at Potter Hall, Harry's ancestral home, not in Godric's Hollow. Yes, you should go back and read the entire story...I think you'll like it!!

Ron...food...have any two things ever gone together as well?

I would love to see your reviews when you read my story properly...especially since you've gotten a taste of it! :)

Thanks for the review, Meg!!


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Review #15, by adluvshp Some Tricky Magic

8th April 2017:
That bit of conversation when they were figuring out about the wards was really well-written. I liked how Ron came up with his own genius analogy of how it was like cake and managed to explain it too - in a way that it made sense to me too. And then Harry making the connection about the house-elves was perfect. The way you write how they all brainstorm stuff together is very effortless to read and understand. That little moment of Hermione being called "Miss SPEW" was cute hehe. And ugh Rita skeeter is so annoying. Didn't she learn her lesson in Hogwarts about slandering the "quartet". I could kill her, lol. Ginny's reaction was totally justified. Her feeling of not being able to help Harry and crying about it was a little strange because I would think she is usually stronger than that but oh well. It works along the storyline I suppose. Harry and Ginny are ridiculously adorable though. I love the sweet talk the two share, and their dialogues are really well-written. Their moments are my favourite and am glad you ended the chapter on such a nice note like that - him thinking that this is real family. Very sweet!

Author's Response: Hey, again, adluvshp!!

I really like this review contest thing going on!! Love getting and responding to reviews!! Thanks!!

You know...being an amateur thespian, I just hear their conversations in my head (Yes, with their different voices) and I just write what I hear. Weird, I know!

Yes, Ginny is a VERY strong woman...but when it's your soul-mate that is in turmoil and pain, even the strongest of women (and men) sometimes have to have a good cry. I find it an especially deep realization for Ginny. She is from a large family and probably has never know loneliness...especially the long-term loneliness that Harry has had to endure. That kind of world-changing view can have a profound emotional impact on a person...even one as strong as Ginny!

I love that you liked the chapter. Keep reading and reviewing!! :D


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Review #16, by Marshal Thinking Outside The Box

8th April 2017:
Okay as odd as this may sound this chapter reminded me a LOT of a scene from one of my favorite movies Singing in the Rain. The whole bit where everyone thought Ron's career was shot and his favorite team was on the outs and then suddenly a brilliant idea is created and suddenly things aren't as bleak and what was sad is now happy. If this was a musical or Singing in the Rain the end of this chapter would be where the musical number would be.

Still I like the brilliant idea that Hermione came up with and I found it funny and amusing that Ron didn't get the turn of phrase "outside of the box" that was cute and funny and was a nice touch and nod to the world of Harry Potter, I like when little things like this are added to a story.

Also the whole Ron and Harry learning Martial Arts has me confused a little, I noticed it being mentioned in a later chapter and I'm wondering what got them into it. I suppose that is something that I will have to read past chapters that I have skipped to figure out what got Ron and Harry into Martial Arts. It is a unique thing to have them be interested in and doing but I suppose there is a reason and maybe I'll find out what it is.

Author's Response: Marshal...good to see you!! Thanks for reading and reviewing!!

What's even more odd is that I'm a musician and amateur thespian...musicals are "my thing". I never even considered a correlation to Singing in the Rain, but I think you're spot on!! Good eyes, Marshal!!

If you like the "out of the box" scenario, you'll love the chapters when Harry and Ron start discussing Martial Arts and how it all comes about.

Thanks, and keep on reading and reviewing!!


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Review #17, by adluvshp Thinking Outside The Box

8th April 2017:
Ooh martial arts, that's an interesting inclusion and i liked how you have gone in depth regarding that here - research must have gone into it! This Master Wu was an interesting and enjoyable character to read. Your mix of the martial arts with magic is a great concept and then the way you have written it, I am able to imagine the scene and visualise what's happening! This whole angle of Quidditch with investors and all is also quite new and interesting, we definitely did not think of all this when we read about Quidditch in the canon books but your perspective on all this makes a lot of sense! It's really fun that they are going to be silent investors too, I was not expecting that, and Hermione's reasoning as always is on point. "W AND W Investing" - so devious haha, I love it the way Ron loved the idea too. Hermione is after all an awesome devious member of the trio too. I am also looking forward to Fleur's involvement, it's a great thing they have included her! I am glad the couples are having a good time and that their life is sorted, or it's on the path to be at least! The interactions and thoughts were nicely written, good work!

Author's Response: Again, hello adluvshp!!

I thought the mixture of martial arts and wizardry worked quite well and quite natural. I have practiced a few styles of martial arts, so yes, there was some research, but also some practical experience.

Also, I figured Quidditch is a professional sport, so there had to be some type of investment...just like other pro sports...so i added that into the story line. I'm glad you could follow the idea.

Well, with all the devious things the Golden Trio did while students, I didn't think it would rub off too soon! :)

Glad you liked the ideas and the chapter! Keep it up...I'd love some more reviews from you!


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Review #18, by Marshal Luna Gets The Inside Scoop

8th April 2017:
Wow! Almost everyone is in qudditch! I wasn't expecting that. Okay so Hermione is not in qudditch but Harry, Ron and Ginny. I know Ginny being on the Harpies is canon but Ron too for the Cannons that is a surprise. I know you had to have revealed it way back but I skipped around so this is news to me.

Also was "Golden Trio" used in the books I know that is what we call the Trio and I get Golden Quartet branching from there. Their answer about the name though was nicely written.

I did enjoy a lot of the glances shared between everyone during the interview and I am glad I got to know what Brighter Futures is in this chapter that is so cool Harry supporting an Orphanage! That works very well for him.

Also I love how Nev proposed and the mention of Luna's romance interest. It is a lot of fun seeing all the couples come together and pairing off. I also like that Gran likes Hannah that makes it all the more sweet. It will be interesting to see who you have win the cup when everyone is on a different team. I suspect it will possibly come down to between two of them. It will be interesting to see where you take things, and how you brought things to be - we'll see what I end up reading next and what new things I can learn.

Author's Response: Hey again, Marshal!!

Yes, it was all revealed in the first two chapters, but I forgive you for hopping around. You might like this story, so try it from the beginning after your review challenge!!

I don't think "Golden Trio" is canon, but a very popular moniker...so I thought I would use it. I'm glad you like "Golden Quartet"!

Thanks for the review and I anxiously await more reviews!!


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Review #19, by adluvshp Luna Gets The Inside Scoop

8th April 2017:
Ooh Neville proposed to Hannah, that's so sweet. It's nice that post-war all these guys (and girls) have kept in touch and are friends and things are going well for all of them. I also liked the inclusion of Luna in this chapter. Writing her can be difficult but I think you did a fairly good job of writing her, especially in terms of dialogues. The interview was a nice way to get out all the information and the inside thoughts of the group. And the way Harry revealed Ginny was his girlfriend was cute, hehe. I like how you modified the muggle saying to a magical one by saying "kneazle" instead of cat by the way. And ugh I totally cringe at "Golden Quartet" that sounds so bad, worse than golden trio, haha. Also the way luna got dazed out and was captivated by their answers was in-character and also really sweet. The last bit was nice too, with Ginny saying Luna was like family. It warmed my heart. Such little touches work well to add intricacy to the story. I really enjoyed reading the backstories of what they all did after the war too, and overall I think it was a great way to take the story forward. Oh and Hermione doing welfare work for elves and creatures and stuff is also awesome, very much in character and loved that addition!

Author's Response: Thanks, adluvshp!

Writing Luna was a bit tricky...I know she seems a bit daft most of the time, but I wanted to show her maturing with the others, but not losing her "Lunaness", if you know what I mean.

I'm really glad you liked the little touches and back stories...I try to fill in gaps whenever I can and I'd set that up in earlier chapters, so I felt the time was right with this chapter.

Thanks again and keep reading...you know I love reviews!!


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Review #20, by Marshal Puddlemere vs. Pride of Portree

8th April 2017:
I think you did a very good job with this match. None of us have really played the game so there is a lot left to the imagination and you did a good job with it. I liked how you worked with strategy in this instead of just having Harry go all out for the snitch. It worked really well.

Also the house elves in the robes to match Harry was really funny to me, oh and the end Harry taking Teddy for a spin on his broom was far too precious! It was beyond adorable and I really enjoyed that. You did well with Teddy keeping his words simple and child like, very cute.

The beginning was fun to watching Harry think about Ginny and how he wants to be with her for forever and how he thinks he just might love her and how he wants to make her the happiest witch in the world. THough I was shaking my head at him questioning himself in regards to her. I'm like she loves you dummy! Of course sometimes Harry can be a little thick.

Having jumped around, I know I've missed a few things but I'm guessing that Benjy was the seeker but Harry had to take over him for some reason? Maybe I'll find out in another chapter!

Author's Response: Thanks Marshal! Nice to see you!

I didn't want Harry to be this amazing, perfect Seeker right out of Hogwarts, so strategy, not superhuman skill, was a must.

How the House Elves came to have Harry's robes is a neat little idea from earlier chapters...you really need to read the whole story. I think you'll like all the little tidbits I throw in!

Yes, you will find out how Harry got Benjy's Seeker spot if you read the whole story. If you're a Quidditch lover, you'll love this story!



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Review #21, by adluvshp Puddlemere vs. Pride of Portree

8th April 2017:
Harry contemplating about not knowing what love was made me so very sad. Of all the people in the HP universe, he should not be feeling like that - and I'm glad he realised that. His doubts made sense but then I was happy he came to the conclusion that he could love and make Ginny happy! Also, random thing but I love the idea of Harry with a golden hoop earring hehe.


"Harry felt a sense of calm and stillness that he had never felt before. The pitch became crystal clear.." This entire paragraph was really well-written and visually appealing. I was transported into the scene and could imagine the calm and happiness he felt on the pitch. And from that point on, the match was written very well, great descriptions and detail. I wish you broke up the huge chunks of paragraphs though as they can be a little hard on the eye to read and I tend to lose track of the flow at times. But besides that, this makes for a good read and the characters are relatable. Teddy is so adorable and I absolutely love how Harry treats his little godson, that is one side of him we did not get to see in the books but you have shown well. And also, i love how we see young harry still in him - that he did not hear anything because he was so focused on the match. great details there.

Author's Response: Hey adluvshp...nice to see you!!

Well, Harry has only realized recently what real, true love is...so he's still a bit wary of it, I think. He can be a bit thick about those kinds of things.

Oooh...I love when people say they can "see" what I wrote, like a movie or something. Lets me know I've hit the nail on the head!!

I will take you advice and try to break those big blocks up a bit.

And, I love my "Teddy Moments"...that's what I call the bits with Harry and Teddy together! He's adorable. I hope I've done him justice!

Thanks again for the review...keep 'em coming!!!


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Review #22, by Marshal A letter for Harry

8th April 2017:
Three pro team offers! That is really impressive. I honestly wonder what other teams offered to Harry. Also isn't Puddlemere United where Oliver Wood went to? Oh that would be so much fun to see Oliver again! I am quite fond of his character so it will be interesting to see if you bring him in, in this story.

Anyway I really like how you had Harry talk over his decisions with Ginny and that Ron was trying to play the fame card to get out of NEWTS. Also I love the joke Ron made that he might not let Harry in if he becomes a senior Auror. It was funny and cute and very them.

I like the point that Ginny makes that Harry doesn't have to become an Auror to honor the lives of those who died in the war and he had done his part and has time to join the Auror's later.

Also the picture of a family you painted at the end with everyone so perfectly together, that was really nice and sweet. I like how everyone is together and a family and how Harry thinks he can get used to i and in a lot of ways and actually has a whole world open in front of him for once in his life. I think you depicted the newness of choice for Harry very well!

Author's Response: Hey, Marshal!! Thanks for stopping by with a review!!

Yes, Oliver plays for Puddlemere and, yes, you may see him in later chapters. ;)

I'm glad you liked my character portrayals...I tried to keep them all within canon and preserve their uniqueness.

I hope you continue reading my story...I think you'll like where I go with the story line. It's still a "feel-good" story, but it does have some unique ideas.

Thanks again for the review!!


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Review #23, by adluvshp A letter for Harry

8th April 2017:
Ooh a Harry and Quidditch story, very interesting! So, I really like how you have set up the plot here for the things to come - Harry will be a great seeker for sure. The way you wrote the dialogues between the characters was good as I felt I was a part of the scene and the household and could see the chatter that was going on. I wish there had been a little more description though. More of an inner turmoil or thoughts of harry, the description of the surroundings and the interspacing of dialogues and narrative. It might have added more color. Regardless, Ron's and Ginny's characters were on point and I liked their dialogue. Harry wanting to go back and do his NEWTs also makes sense, the poor kid really does need his education to be completed and he was being practical. Mrs Weasley was of course right in giving him space and time to think though, and it was also very much like him to want to ask others like Ginny for the opinions. Her explanation and reasoning was perfect and I felt nice that Harry has her in his life even though I have never been much of a Harry/Ginny shipper. The way you portray it, the two complement each other. Hermione was also very much in character and I smiled when she gave Harry a hug and told him he deserves to do what he wants for once and not what others want. Overall, this looks like the start of a great story and I am curious to see how the plot is shaped further and where Harry goes on this journey.

Author's Response: adluvshp, thanks for the review!

I always thought Harry would do a bit of Quidditch before his Auror career, so this is my attempt at that.

I will admit, this story was the first time I had written in many, many years. I have not edited the first few chapters mainly because I wanted to see my own writing progress. I know it's not the best situation for my readers, but I hope you will see my progress as you make your way through my story.

I'm glad you like the Harry/Ginny ship as well as Hermione/Ron... I have tried to keep them in character!

Please continue reading...I think you'll like where the story line goes! :)

Again, thanks for the review!!


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Review #24, by Broadway Lion The Season Ends And New Lives Begin

1st April 2017:
LION has finished this one although him read the next story foist. Again very perfect story telling.

I love Potter Hall. I tried to mention that earlier but that review did not go through, some bad words that ended in dot com I presume.

I knew their had to be more to the Potter Estate than a cottage in the Hollows. I really want to explore more about that, maybe work it into a story, or maybe work up the Potter Family tree.

My book is complete and the broadwaylion even has a website where his complete .pdf is being hidden by a friendly lynx! It will take long time to post it here at 1 1/2 chapters per week.

ROAR

Author's Response: Hello again, LION!

I'm guessing from your review that you read Have No Fear first? That could be confusing! :)

Yes, Potter Hall is quite intriguing...I spent a lot of time trying to find a real estate that fit the vision in my mind so I could accurately describe it to my readers. I hope I did a good job.

I'll have to drop by your site and check out your .pdf, if I can find that tricky Lynx!

Still have a couple of chapters left to post on Have No Fear, so keep an eye out for them...coming soon!

As always, thanks for the review!!



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Review #25, by Broadway Lion A New Look For Grimmauld Place

30th March 2017:
I like your writing and your character development. The story is coming along very nicely

ROAR

Author's Response: Broadway Lion,

Thanks for stopping in and checking out my story!! Special thanks for leaving a review.
I hope you enjoy the rest of the story and will continue on to my sequel, Have No Fear!

Thanks for the compliments - I'm glad you like the characters and storyline.

Feel free to drop reviews whenever you feel like it. :D


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