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11 Reviews Found

Review #1, by krazyboutharryginny Halloween

4th April 2017:
(jailbreak review for ctf)

Oh my gosh, that was so creepy. I think it was a really smart choice to start the story with the little snippet of Rose having attacked James. Right away I had so many questions and wanted to continue reading to figure out what was going on. It also set the tone for the whole story and made it clear how high the stakes were/how serious the situation was.

I was relieved to know that Rose didn't attack (I refuse to say kill, maybe an offscreen miracle happened...!) James of her own free will, although that obviously doesn't make the whole thing any less horrible or tragic. It was such a cool idea to have Bellatrix come back from the dead in this weird, non-ghostly sort of way to try and enact some sort of revenge on those who had (in her eyes) wronged her - even if it was through their families. I did wonder why Bellatrix chose Rose, when Harry was the one Bellatrix had a problem with (why not Lily?) but then again, Bellatrix was killed by a Weasley so there is that aspect to it too.

If only Rose would've told someone what was going on! Even if she hadn't been able to describe the problem very well, surely one of the teachers could have done something!

Ugh, how horrible and creepy. You really did a great job on this. I'm still feeling a little bit unsettled!

-Kayla

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Review #2, by nott theodore Halloween

4th April 2017:
CTF Review

Oh. Wow.

Seriously, this was absolutely fantastic, and I loved reading it! It was such an original idea and the way that you chose to write it, with the different narrative voices and points of view, really added to the whole story.

It was tense right from the start - that opening section had me asking so many questions and I really wanted to know what had happened. It's definitely not the sort of opening you expect to read in your average next generation story, but things got even darker and scarier after that.

I loved your use of second person to address the sections with Rose. It's my favourite narrative voice when it's done right, and it certainly was here. It took me a couple of sections to realise that it was Bellatrix who was actually looking at the scene and talking to Rose (because she was basically possessing her and causing her to do all these things. Poor Rose! Evil Bellatrix, even when she's dead!). That was such a clever idea and I loved your execution of it.

One of my favourite things about this story also had to be the short sections that you used as they really helped build up tension. I liked the way that we started with this extremely dramatic moment and dialled it back to the build up, when her friends notice Rose actif strangely and we realise why. It made me even more nervous for what was about to come.

The ending was so powerful! I don't think it would have had anywhere near the same effect if you'd have continued with the narrative there, but this left me hanging on edge, hoping that Scorpius (and James, and Rose) are all okay but not ever being able to be sure they are...

Sian :)

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Review #3, by Marshal Halloween

10th February 2016:
Hey Rumpel,

I am here to give you your third review for placing in my challenge. This was soo interesting. I love the bath and forth. Your use of different voice between Rose and Bellatrix was lovely and well done. It was quite brilliant to be honest.

The slow movement of Bellatrix's influence was dark, creepy and well done. You did a wonderful capturing the voices of both Bellatrix and Rose as she succumbed to the influence. Well done and I am left wanting more and yet satisfied with what happened.

Again lovely work!
-Marshal

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Review #4, by ReeBee Halloween

8th December 2015:
here for our review swap :) we must do this more often!

omg rumpel what am i even meant to say to this/?? the summary itself is like a work of art!!! at first i was like what murder, what Bellatrix, wait am i reading marauders and then I was like no its next gen so what does this mean??? needless to say i was very confused and therefore HAD to click on it and read it right???

so i have no idea what to saw I'm shocked and speechless bc this was just so speechless??? like everything made sense after reading the first part of bellatrix's POV but even then like ;O woah woman you really outdid yourself this time!

and can i just say that the characterisation of bellatrix was so spot on. like the writing i could imagine it in Helena Bonham Carter's voice as bellatrix and it was horrible and gave me chills and it was all just too amazing to handle!!!

and even though Scorpius only appears for a tiny bit of time he was so perfect I thought i was going to cry. i love him and please don't let him die. like please please please. and all the characterisations were actually great like Al being concerned and James' being a little well himself i don't know i loved it.

and the use of second person was perfect. like i said the whole thing gave me chills and i thought i was going to cry because everything was just too perfect and so i have no CC. I'm sorry but this really was extremely close to my definition of perfection!!

we must do this again soon!

-Curie xx

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Review #5, by alicia and anne Halloween

23rd November 2015:
Oh, now this is a Halloween story! This was so scary and fit in the theme so well. I can't believe that she's been posessed by Bellatrix of all people! No wonder she was acting so strangely, to have an evil like that trying to take over your body!

You wrote this so well, making Rose's posessing seem so real. And the way that you wrote Bellatrix was just awesome! You have such a talent capturing her personality. I'm scared of her.

I CAN'T HAVE YOU END IT THERE! I NEED TO KNOW MORE! DOES SHE CONTINUE KILLING? DOES SHE HURT SCORPIUS? DOES JAMES SURVIVE? DOES SHE GET HELP!!!
AHhh! So many questions!

This was epic! So very epic and I love this so much!

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Review #6, by adluvshp Halloween

11th November 2015:
Rumpel! I'm so glad we were paired for the review exchange because you're one of the authors I've read such few things of, which is a shame because you're such an amazing writer. So, I'm happy to be here!

First off, this was a very well-written piece. I absolutely loved it. You took two of my favourite characters - Rose and Bellatrix - and wrote them the way I love them - all dark and twisted. I loved the idea of Bellatrix staying back in some form to take revenge, and then polluting Rose's mind. Rose's emotions were aptly portrayed, and really, your descriptions were chilling.

The story tied in with the theme of Halloween beautifully and I loved the writing style with the timeline and stuff. The words you used were simple and direct, and yet they had a powerful impact because the imagery played out wonderfully. The ending bit was sad and disturbing with Rose first killing James and then aiming for Scorpius. I felt so bad for the two boys. Bellatrix enjoying the entire events she had caused was also hauntingly well-portrayed.

All in all, I think you captured the characterisations very well here and conveyed a lot in such few words. The writing flowed together amazingly well and the entire thing had a lasting effect which was perfect. I really enjoyed reading this! Great job!

Love,
Angie
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #7, by Peeves the Poltergeist Halloween

24th October 2015:
Hello all! In the spirit of Halloween, I am doing something EXTRA special! If you are reading this, you are now a part of the Poltergeist chain! If you don't review TWO other people using the anonymous review name Peeves the Poltergeist within in TWENTY-FOUR (24) hours, I will drop chairs on your head until All Hallows Eve! You must copy the line and the portion above it and paste it into the beginning of each of your TWO reviews. Please try to review someone who hasn't already been reviewed by Peeves. Repeats are allowed, but discouraged. Happy Halloween!

Oh, Peevesy hated that Bellatrix lady! Wee Potty helped to destroy her, but I always hated her. She tried to destory the castle. I should be the only one destroying the castle! Not her! It wasn't fair for all my hard work. Ohhh, I know Rosie Posie too, and she's a good girl, a good girl! She wouldn't do this! No, no, no! I can't believe you made her do this! Oh it was interesting to read, but I can't believe you made her do this! Ooooh, you're a brave one, writing something like this!

Peevesy liked how we were Rosie Posie, yes I did, yes I did! It was hard to see good little Rosie Posie doing this bad lady Bellatrix things, but reading it like we were her made it even badder! But it also made it even gooder! Am I making any sense? Sometimes it's more fun to make NO sense. NO SENSE, NO SENSE, LET'S ALL MAKE NONESENSE! But this wasn't nonesense, this was good sense! Lots and lots of good sense! Which is why Peevesy liked it so much!

I liked this a lot. A LOT, A LOT, A WHOLE BIG LOT.

Author's Response: Dearest Peeves,

THIS IS AMAZING! Thank you, thank you, thank you -- this review really made me smile. While leaving two reviews in the next 24 hours is nearly impossibly with my current schedule, I promise to leave two under the guise of Peeves within a couple days. If you allow me this break (and DON'T drop chairs on me), I promise to protect you from the Baron for the rest of the month ;).

Sincerely,
Rumpel


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Review #8, by Seasons_Greetings Halloween

13th October 2015:
Hello my dear Rumpel,

My name is SeasonsGreetings and I'm here to spread love and cheer across the HPFF forums/archives from now until the New Year!

I've been looking for some holiday reading to get me in the mood and with Halloween coming up in a few short weeks, this looked like the perfect choice. I do love a good creepy tail. I probably should've waited until the sun came up though because now I'm afraid to unbunch the covers I'm hiding under.

This was a very unique concept, but one that I liked quite a bit. Bellatrix is such an awful person that this seems exactly like something she would do. I could imagine her refusing to pass on in order to get revenge.

My heart broke as I watched Rose try and fight her possession. It reminded me of Ginny struggling with Tom Riddle quite a bit. The ending was quite frightful and I was shouting at my computer through most of it. I just wanted to shield James and Scorpius from the insane psychopath inhabiting her body.

You've done a lovely job of capturing the creepy Halloween holiday spirit and once the sun comes up, I'm going to need a large cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows to help me settle down.

For now, let me wish you a very happy holiday season!

Cheers.

SG

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Review #9, by EnigmaticEyes16 Halloween

4th October 2015:
Hi! I am finally here for our swap!

Well, this was certainly different from anything I've ever read. It's very interesting though, the idea that Bellatrix didn't move on, but is stuck in Hogwarts, not a ghost but still there even though no one can see her.

It's crazy that she can whisper into people's ears and over time, make them do things they'd never do. But at the same time, Bellatrix is crazy and I could totally see her taking control of someone else's will to do her bidding. Poor Rose, and poor James, and poor everyone else Rose is going to kill on that night.

I wonder what will happen to Rose in the end. Will she go to Azkaban? Will she go crazy? Of course, if they remove her from the school, then Bellatrix won't be able to whisper into her ear while she sleeps anymore so maybe she'd go back to normal? But then I wouldn't be surprised if Bellatrix just moved on to someone else after that. I highly doubt she'd stop there after learning what she can do.

Anyway, this was a great read! Thanks so much for agreeing to do this swap with me!

xxNix

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Review #10, by carry on with your knitting Halloween

2nd October 2015:
Hello!

It's Katie here from the forums finally here for our swap! Sorry it took me so long but RL has been mad :')

I thought this was a great little one shot and very halloweeny which is fab because who doesn't love halloween?!
I really enjoyed reading it :)

I really liked the idea of Bellatrix still wanting to cause mayhem from beyond the grave because she would 110% do that. even though she and Voldemort are dead, she would always serve him. I thought the idea of killing the children of the golden trio was a really interesting idea of revenge. Almost like taking away the most important thing to them forever and making them live with the pain because that is worse then just killing them, and again, very Bella ;)

I really like the structure and the way you wrote it from view points, starting with the end and then back to the start, it was a great way of writing it! I also liked that you put the reader in the position of Rose, it's almost like Bellatrix is whispering in our own ears, it was an awesome effect you created! :)

The only thing I did notice is you describe narcissa as Scorpius' mother, instead of grandmother, but other then that it was great! :D

Overall it was a brilliant read and perfect for this time of year!

Thanks for the swap, I hope we can do it again at some point! :)

Katie :)

Author's Response: Hey dear,

No worries about taking your time -- it's totally cool.

Hooray for Halloween! I'm glad that you enjoyed it.

A plot bunny inspired by reading the challenge -- I don't know why, but the thought of Bellatrix essentially possessing a member of the Next-Gen crowd was awfully appealing.

:D I generally enjoy switching POVs and playing with new characters. It keeps me entertained, and can add some cool features to a story. Thank you!

Ooops! *Blush* I'm not sure how I didn't catch that in editing, but it's fixed now. Thanks for pointing that out to me. I was having a moment, apparently. :)

Thanks for the great swap!

-Rumpel


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Review #11, by Cannons Halloween

29th September 2015:
Hey!

Long time no speak!

This is the creepiest thing I have ever read on this site and I loved it. I really liked the POV switches between Bellatrix and Rose, that worked brilliantly. This is exactly something I could see happening in an odd sort of way, Bellatrix doesn't give up easily and she was certainly devoted enough to go through with something like this.

Your shorter paragraphs, as well as the swapping between Bellatrix and Rose kept the pace up and added the suspense which kept me reading. It's been a while since I have read anything of yours but I wasn't disappointed!

Good luck for the challenge!

Author's Response: Hey there!

Creepy is my middle name (Rumpel McCreepy Rumpelstiltskin, in fact ;) ).

Yay! I'm glad you enjoyed the structure. This was a first-attempt at Bellatrix and a first true attempt at Next-Gen, and POV switching is just SO much fun!!

I'm glad you liked it! Thanks and thanks for the swap!

-Rumpel (McCreepy Rumpelstiltskin)


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