Reading Reviews for Unexpected Attraction
10 Reviews Found

Review #1, by maraudertimes Unexpected Attraction

19th September 2016:
Hi hi!

This was really cool! I don't typically see Blaise stories where he's... well not necessarily the good guy but I guess the protagonist? And when I do, he's usually with Draco and the other Slytherins, but I liked how you had him somewhat on his own, a lone wolf who doesn't really care about what his housemates think. Even though he's a bit pretentious and rude, his attraction to Susan kind of softened him and I really liked that character development!

And Susan! What a beautiful girl! I love how she has several dimensions to her. One being that she is a sweet girl, who assumes that Blaise is trying to help her, even though I'm sure it was a very snarky comment. The other, that she's smart and hardworking, like when she writes in runes for fun(?!?!). And then the last, that she's very fierce, like when Blaise was 'messing' with her. I thought it was really cool to see the different sides of a Hufflepuff, to have her exemplify traits from three of the four houses.

Their little budding relationship is really cute and when he finally kissed her, agh! I'm so happy! It was a really cute/snarky moment and that's totally representative of the both of them! And the fact that it was perfect!! I'm so happy!

This was such a cute story and I'm so glad I read it! You're a great writer and the amount of character development you were able to cram in to such a small piece is extraordinary! Thanks!
Lo :)

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Review #2, by beyond the rain Unexpected Attraction

28th July 2016:
Hey! I'm here from the slytherin review tag! Reading this I never thought I'd like the idea of Blaise and Susan. It's an interesting ship to consider. The way Blaise hints that he likes Susan and shows interest in her is lovely, especially when he talks about her laugh. That was my favourite bit.

Your interpretation of Susan is absolutely gorgeous. She seems rather naive, but not - if that makes sense. She reminds me of Luna, like Blaise suggested, but there's something about her that seems like she's more aware of harsh realities.

Susan really is a breath of fresh air, for both myself and Blaise I think.

I loved the bit with Runes, and how she has her own code. I also liked how she reacted when Blaise tried to read it. It's like she isn't scared of him as most people would it, and she's willing to stick up for him in front of her friends.

The kiss at the end was absolutely lovely, and a perfect way to end it!

Your writing style is fabulous and you have me intrigued by this ship!


Author's Response: Hello lovely!

I remember posting in the review tag, but at the same time forgot that I did! So I was surprised to find your wonderful review! I am so glad you liked the story and the ship. Susan and Blaise are such fun characters to write. I am also glad you liked the ship. I've considered writing more but I don't have much story and I sadly don't think they lasted forever as a couple as much as I love them together.

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Review #3, by Snowflake Elf Unexpected Attraction

11th December 2015:
Hi there, Marshal, is it? I'm just scurrying away from my duties to come immerse myself in your fics. Shhh it's a secret though. Can't let people know I've been neglecting my work.

But what better reason to do so than to read some Susan/Blaise? This is such an adorable pairing, quite unusual, and I love it! Your ship reminds me of Salazar/Helga to a certain extent. That's another cute pairing, one that you don't see very often. Anyway, I should stop digressing. This little mind of mine has so many thoughts, yes, so many thoughts, and it's hard to keep track.

I love how you've characterised Blaise here. I've watched him from time to time, made a note of the ways in which people see him. He's a secretive one, isn't he? Doesn't give much away. Which makes it so much more interesting to see the different ways in which he's written. You've done a great job there! I love how he has this kind of arrogant tone from the very beginning. He's not one to go against the whole Pureblood regime but he also has his own set standards. I like that he's not Malfoy's best friend here as well. That's different and a great addition to his character.

Susan is so endearing! She's such a Puff and it's so lovely. I can definitely see how she's the one who got through Blaise's hard exterior and made him fall for her. It's so adorable and I love how you've written her character. All those little encounters that she and Blaise have are so cute, and even though he's kind of rude to her, she's so unfazed. Certainly what he needs to cool down a little.

I love that little detail about the letters being written in Runes. It also suggests that Susan is a smart girl as well as a really nice one. I really like how there are little details, bits of dialogue and description that just add to understanding the characters' personalities.

And great job at inculcating the proverb in there as well. Seamlessly done!

Thank you for this fic, I really enjoyed my little break. Now, I must get back to work before I get a kicking!

Author's Response: Seeing that the Christmas season is past and everything worked out well I’m sure you were able to get your duties done successfully oh elf! I’m glad you liked my selected pairing it was kind of a last minute inspiration that made me quite happy. You honor me by comparing the ship to Salazar and Helga! They are a favorite ship of mine. Long ago I tried my hand at a fic for them but it didn’t turn out as well as I would have liked. I may try again one of these days but that is another tale for another time.

I’m glad you like my take on Blaise though. His voice just came to me loud and clear and in some ways what I wrote is what I viewed in the book. I’ve honestly never seen Blaise as Malfoy’s friend or crony. I found that the socialized and were polite but that Blaise wasn’t always fond of Draco so that is what I wrote here. I’m glad it gave him a lot of character and depth though I’m in some ways surprised at the fact that my view of him is considered so different.

Again thank you for your high remarks on how I wrote Susan! I had a lot of fun with her. I like Hufflepuff characters but I don’t always feel I’m good at writing them long term simply because they are too similar to me in nature in a lot of ways. I’m not so secretly a Puff myself. I claim Slytherpuff as I am in the house of Slytherin but really I’m probably more puff than snake, but I’m discovering how I’m becoming more and more Slytherin as time passes. Alas I digress! Susan was still fun to write and I’m glad I did her character and the house of Hufflepuff well.

As for the runes, I admit that little touch was to help give her more depth and also show that Badgers are more than just duffers in a lot of ways. I knew if I didn’t give Susan and edge so to speak by being smart then Blaise’s attention may have wandered. It also made sense that Susan would be more than just a sweet girl and might be smart because of who her auntie was.

Thank you again for such a lovely review. It was a nice little surprise when I saw it I just hate that life has kept me from answering you as readily as I would have liked.

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Review #4, by Panda Weasley  Unexpected Attraction

5th December 2015:
Hey Marshal!
I'm here for Day Three of the Advent Calendar. I can't believe that I haven't read any of your work before, I loved this!

I think the choice to have Blaise as the main character was a good one. He's a character that we don't see a lot of, and reading this made me wonder if he really was one of Draco's henchmen. We don't know if he agreed with Draco and the Slytherins, we just know he was there and with Draco. From the books we get the sense that he is another one of Draco's followers, but I liked this alternate view. His opinion about the beginning of the new school year was also interesting. I guess I always assumed that like Harry everybody would be excited. It makes since that they're not though, school is school after all.

I thought your use of the proverb was well done. While I was reading I wasn't exactly sure what your proverb was, which is good because you don't want the proverb overwhelming the story. I actually forgot at one point that it as for that challenge. It wasn't until the end when Blaise says it that I realized what it was. I think that it fit well with the story, and I liked that you chose the enemies to be Slytherin and Hufflepuff.

Overall I thought this was well done and I didn't spot any typos or errors. Excellent writing!
~Panda Weasley

Author's Response: Panda,
I hate that it has taken me so long to give you a response to your lovely review! It was a lovely surprise when I saw it! I’m glad you liked my unique view. I never viewed Blaise as a straight up crony of Draco. I always read the story as a general toleration of one another so that is what I tried to play out in my writing. Of all Blaise was a fun character to write. I have always liked a lot of the obscure characters when I write.

I’m glad you liked the use of the proverb. I honestly struggled to determine what to write for the proverb initially so the challenge really was a challenge. Still I had fun and I loved playing with the Slytherin/Hufflepuff pairing. Tanks again for the review and the high compliments!
- Marshal

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Review #5, by ScorpiusRose17 Unexpected Attraction

18th November 2015:

So I am finally getting around to reading and reviewing the amazing list of stories for my challenge!

I really enjoyed this. I love the pairing and thought you did a great job of slowly bringing them together. I enjoyed the way that you used the pairing to fit with your proverb! I think I am now a Blaise/Susan shipper!

Good Luck in the Challenge! :)


Author's Response: Thank you for the review. I am so glad that you did enjoy the story! I had a lot of fun with this challenge and I'm hoping I can make something equally as fun for your latest challenge!

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Review #6, by Felpata Lupin Unexpected Attraction

4th November 2015:
Hi Marshal! Here with your review! :)
Aww... This was cute! And such an interesting pairing, too. :) Plus, I know I'm partial, but I love Hufflepuff characters, and your Susan was just so Puffstatic! :D

Characterization is your biggest strenght in this story in my opinion! We really get deep inside Blaise's head. I love how you wrote him, his general annoyment, especially at his housemates and their sense of superiority. It's sort of funny that he has that same haugthiness but still despises it in those around him. :P

It's also sort of funny how he feels this sudden attraction for Susan. She's clearly very different from all the people he usually has to deal with. She is more spontaneous, more light-hearted and a bit clumsy, which surely intrigues someone like Blaise. I think it's really cute the way they slowly get closer!!!

Tiny bit of CC... I think there are a few passages where the flow isn't perfect. I'm thinking mostly about the part of the starting feast and the breakfast the following day. It sounded a bit like a list of actions, if you know what I mean? Maybe it's just my impression, I don't know...

Other tiny bit of CC (this is more content-wise, and mostly just me being a canon perfectionist...) Isn't Amelia Bones already dead in the time period you're writing about?

Despite these things, everything else was brilliant! I loved the characters, the dialogue and the descriptions! And the story in itself was just so adorable! I think I could totally be a Blaise/Susan shipper!!! (Would it be Blusan? :P I don't think it sounds too well...)

Great work! Really well done!
Much love,

Author's Response: Chiara,

Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you on your lovely review. I really appreciate it! I'm glad you liked the story and that the character communicated well. I will certainly read back over this again and see about posting for a beta for the story.

As for the canon bit *blushes* I researched and thought for sure that Amelia died later in the school year like closer to Christmas. I did the research but clearly not well enough. I honestly don't want to change the whole story for that because for me it would change the whole vibe of things. So I am going to leave this be and just claim that it is slightly AU. Nice catch on the canon thing though!

As for the ship, maybe Blaisan?

- Marshal

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Review #7, by TreacleTart Unexpected Attraction

27th October 2015:
Hi Marshal!

I'm here for our review swap.

Blaise is a really interesting character to write about. His backstory is so unique that there's a ton of potential. That being said, whenever I see stories about him, it's almost always about his mother and her lovers, so this was a nice break from that. It was good to see him just being a decent guy and nice to a girl. And a Hufflepuff too!

I actually really liked that you paired him and Susan. I'm a big fan of unusual ships, so this was right up my alley. I thought the way you showed the progression of his feelings was really nice and gave the plot a steady pace. The only part that felt slightly rushed was the very ending. The kiss sort of came out of nowhere for me. She's expressing concern. He's lying about being interested in her and then suddenly he's kissing her in the library. I think a tiny bit more lead up would be good.

As far as concrit goes, I did notice a handful of typos, but it was nothing major. Just something to polish up if you go through and edit.

All in all, I thought this was an interesting story about a very unusual ship.

Good job.


Author's Response: Thanks for the return review Kaitlin. I'm glad to hear that I have the character down. I've always been fond of odd characters and odd situations.

As for the kiss you are the second person that says that there needs to be a bit more lead up. I know for me personally kisses can be sudden and unexpected but with two people saying it now it's at least a pattern a third time and it will be fact that I rushed things. Not that I'm going to ignore what you said I'll look at it again and consider my options for the ending once more.

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Review #8, by AdinaPuff Unexpected Attraction

19th October 2015:

I liked this. Personally Blaise is one of my favorite Hogwarts-Era Slytherins. Actually he IS my favorite.

You did a great job writing this. I love how his mind and judgement seemed to smoothly change throughout the one shot. You did a great job with the development in such a short shot. I applaud that.

I never read anything with Susan, so I like the choice a lot. Usually it's Blaise and hermione or Ginny but I love this little mix. You did your own style and I love it.

Great shot, really enjoyed it!

- Leigh xx

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review. I'd never played with Blaise before. He was a lot of fun to explore and play with. I have gained an affinity of him from doing this fic though. He is a lot of fun. I love his judgmental attitude.

I'm glad you liked the unique choice. I've always liked Slytherin/Huffpuff as a ship. So in the end Susan just seemed perfect.

Thanks again for the review. It brought a smile to my face.

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Review #9, by adluvshp Unexpected Attraction

7th October 2015:
Hey! Here for our review exchange =)

This was brilliant! It brought a sweet little smile to my face and I quite liked reading it. Your characterisation of Blaise was interesting and I enjoyed seeing this side of him. It was cute how he found himself being nice, and being drawn to Susan, and the way his thoughts and emotions played out throughout.

The pairing of Blaise and Susan itself is unusual - one that I've never really come across - but you totally made it believable and realistic. I was shipping them by the end of the fic! I always find the idea of a Slytherin and Hufflepuff nice together - they sort of balance each other out but not in a fiery all-raw-tension sort of way that Gryffindor/Slytherin pairings do - so good job here.

For some constructive criticism, I'd say the ending felt slightly rushed/abrupt. I'd have liked to see the build-up to the kiss a little more prolonged. Just a few more dialogues, thoughts, and descriptions before the kiss, and it'd have been even more perfect and felt natural.

Also, I'd suggest giving some "breathing space" between dialogues and descriptions, as sometimes the paragraphs go on continuously and that can be slightly displeasing to the eye. So, if you break them up a little, especially the ones in the first section of the story, it'd be smoother. Of course, that's just my opinion, and if you don't feel that way, feel free to ignore!

Besides that, as I said, I really enjoyed reading this. The budding romance was adorable and I loved the way you wrote Blaise and Susan. The descriptions were great and the narrative had a very nice feel to it.

What I loved a lot about this one-shot was how simple you kept everything. From the dialogue, to the descriptions, to the plot devices that brought Susan and Blaise together - it was natural, gradual, and sweet. I could relate to them and had a nice time reading this.

I am glad I could stop by to give this a read =)


Author's Response: Thank you. I tend to like unusual. I'm glad you liked the read. I'm glad the characters were relatable and realistic. I've always been fond of Hufflepuffs and Slytherins being together it is an interesting dynamic and I like playing with it.

I really did consider your suggestion for expanding the ending but I don't think I want to expand it. In a lot of ways I like the bit of abruptness. A lot of times a first kiss is sudden and unexpected. You are moving a long having a nice conversation and without even realizing you are kissing. While some kisses build up and you see them coming from a mile off others just sort of happen and that is what this kiss is for me. Blaise didn't entirely mean to kiss Susan and Susan didn't even know what was coming, but once there neither of them found room for complaint and that is what made it 'perfect' for them.

Still I appreciated the idea all the same and I did give it some serious thought, it is why it took me so long to get back to you. Thank you so much for the review. I'm glad I was able to 'hit the nail on the head' so to speak with the flow and feel of things.


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Review #10, by MuggleMaybe Unexpected Attraction

4th October 2015:
Hi Marshal! I'm here for the swap!

I don't think I've ever read a Blaise/Susan story before. What an unique ship to pick!

One thing you do really well is show the characters' personalities. I practically had flashbacks to my teenaged years reading this. You just captured Blaise's jaded "who cares" attitude so well! You made him interesting even though he isn't sympathetic. Susan, on the other hand, reads as very sweet and intelligent, but perhaps somewhat naive.

It really is an interesting idea to pair them. There's a worry that Blaise, being a blood purist, might be cruel hearted, balanced by the hope that Susan's warmth will help soften him up a little. Or perhaps it's just this one kiss, but I have a feeling Blaise's interest won't flicker out quite so quickly.

I am VERY curious about what Amelia said in the letter!

As far as constructive criticism goes, I suggest reading through again to check for grammar and typos. It happens to us all, unfortunately! ;)

Thanks so much for the swap! I enjoyed reading!

Author's Response: Renee,

Thank you so much for an awesome review swap! I really appreciate you giving Unexpected Attraction some love. I've kind of been wanting to hear some feed back on it. I have wondered if things were too trite and unrealistic but based on what you said I think I might have done things right.

I admit the unique ship came from the proverb I was given of 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer'. I wanted somethign uncommon and a friend suggested Blaise and Hannah Abbot and I realized that it wasn't Hannah I needed but Susan and things just bubbled from there.

While this story is done and I don't think I'll write more Blaise and Susan I know know in my head where things go for them. They certainly have a romantic thing going for a while as Blaise's interest doesn't wane and Susuan kind of gets swept away by the romance of it all so to speak. It probably goes to a point till Blaise either does something stupid/purist which pushes Susan away, they realize they are diametrically opposed over something important, or Blaise finally ends things realizing that Susan is after all a half blood.

Either way I think very few know about their relationship that they had and they were over by the time Susuan's Aunt Amelia is killed. As to the letter, I never thought of what was in it, otherwise I would tell you.

Anyway thanks again for the great review swap - after I read your review I instantly went and read over things tweaking the story, tightening things up, adding commas and fixing typos. I probably don't have them all but there should be an improvement all the same once the edits are approved.

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