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Reading Reviews for deteriorating
3 Reviews Found

Review #1, by The Basilisk deteriorating

8th October 2015:
Hi! I know you haven't been having the best time of late with your injury so I'd thought I'd try to cheer you up by reviewing this ermmm... lovely little one-shot.

This is a very gory story! The imagery of all the blood is very clearly explained though and it's so interesting yet so disturbing to read.

I feel bad for Marlene, because it sounds like she could have had feelings for Sirius, only to have to die to hear him say those three words to her. I also feel terrible for Sirius to have to lose someone he loves in that way, to have to watch her bleed out on the sidewalk unable to save her. It's so heartbreaking that Marlene just wants to die in the end so Sirius' crying will stop, but in reality it will only stop for her. Sirius will still be there crying when she's finally passed on.

This was such a sad, yet intriguing one-shot to read. Great job on all the detail though, it was very well done.

-The Basilisk

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I was having a pretty crummy afternoon...

I know, I know. It's gory! I'm glad you were so moved by its bitterness and bluntness. I feel bad for Marlene, too. I spend a lot of my time feeling sorry for her unfortunately.

Thanks for your lovely, uplifting review. It really helped!


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Review #2, by Fonzzx deteriorating

30th September 2015:
Ok so I’ve been meaning to review all the individual entries I got for the Blackinnon Challenge for a while now… I read them all as soon as they were entered, but never actually got round to reviewing and deciding on a winner… until now!

This is a side of Blackinnon that is rarely deeply discussed. I like how it’s more from Marlene’s perspective, finding her family dead, how she feels, what she sees, smells, hears, etc.

And then Sirius enters the scene.

“Sirius Black doesn’t love Marlene.” I love that line. I think it sums up their relationship nicely.

The imagery in this piece is wonderful. I have often wondered what it would feel like to die, but I’ve never really imagined it in detail. You have done a really good job here.

“She never gave up.” This shows her stubbornness that seems to be universally acknowledged within the fandom but has never outright been said by anything canon. This is Marlene all over, at least for me it is.

I have to admit, I did come across this one Tumblr before you posted it on here because I regularly check the Blackinnon tag. I did really enjoy this piece; it’s very real, very heartbreaking, and totally Blackinnon.

After I review everything, I’m going to post the results on the forums. Keep an eye out!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

I was very nervous about this piece, because I wanted to do her death justice. I have many headcanons about her death scene, and I think this one fit the challenge perfectly.

Thanks for choosing me as first place! I'm so honored!!


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Review #3, by carry on with your knitting deteriorating

2nd September 2015:
Hello! :)

I'm here for the review swap! :D

I love Blackinnon so I was super excited to read this and it definitely didn't disappoint:)

So first of I wanna say I LOVED the idea that she to conscious of the whole process of her death. A lot of people think of death as being swift and easy and painless, but this is so different and refreshing! :)
I thought the way you linked Marlene's different features and aspects to each of her family members was brilliant! It really reflected how close she must have been to them!
Oh my goodness, Sirous' reaction and the fact she could hear and see parts of it was utterly heartbreaking! The kiss/resuscitation part wa so clever as well! I thought it was a brilliant way to have the romance, but actually hit yje reader with reality :)

Overall it was both brilliant and heart breaking, and a pleasure to read! :)

Katie :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review! This means so much to me. I know that Sirius would be devastated, and Marlene would be conscious. I just went from there!

I'm elated to hear you enjoyed it.


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