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Reading Reviews for The Walk To Your Beloved
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by looneylizzie The Walk To Your Beloved

1st May 2016:
Lauren!

Okay, hereís another story of yours that Iíve read but havenít reviewedÖ itís shameful, really. :(

Once again, FEELS. So many warm and fuzzy feelings here!

I just love the way youíve captured this sweet moment for Lily and James. Itís such a short story, and yet itís packed with emotion ó itís impossible not to smile when James just grabs Lily and kisses her before the wedding can even startÖ itís so adorable and the joy of the moment is just infectious, and the fact that youíre able to do that through writing is so impressive!

It wasnít until I read your A/N at the end that I realized that this was for the A-to-Z challenge (and not just the first time! I keep forgetting that it is!), because itís practically impossible to tell! Sometimes it becomes obvious with some of the weirder letters, like X or Q, but you manage to make it seem really natural, which is AMAZING!!

Anyway, another fantastic story from you, Lauren! I love, love, LOVE, your writing, so keep going okay?
Lizzie

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Review #2, by TreacleTart The Walk To Your Beloved

15th September 2015:
Hey Lauren!

I'm here for this months Gryffindor Review Pairing!

First off, congratulations on posting a new story! I'm glad to see you writing a bit again.

I'm always really excited to read challenge entries and see how different prompts inspire people. It's really fascinating. In your case, I thought you made good use of both the A to Z Challenge and the Short and Sweet Challenge.

The moment you've chosen to write about is certainly sweet and I love how you explored it. I thought the moment with Lily's father was very touching and I'm really glad you included it. It gives just a touch of bittersweetness to the overall happy day. Sirius' smart commentary and the fact that Remus was officiating the wedding were nice touches as well. It really helped to build the scene by including all of these different people in it.

You did a great job of getting inside of Lily's head as well. You could really feel the love that she has for James and just the bit of surprise she's feeling at the fact that she's marrying him. I thought all of the thoughts and feelings she was having really fit the scenario as well.

One thing that I did wonder about was how Lily was feeling about Petunia. She thought about her dead mother, but not about a living sister who probably didn't show up to her wedding. I would imagine she'd have some mixed emotions in regards to that. But that's not so much a criticism of the story as it is your story making me wonder about the rest of the event.

I thought the starting of each sentence with a different letter flowed quite smoothly. The only place where I felt it became apparent was when you got to the letters X and Z. Xylograph artwork was just such an oddly specific thing that I couldn't overlook it. Otherwise, I hardly noticed the letters.

I know you were trying to keep the length short for the challenge, but I do have to say that if I had one bit of CC, it's that I would've liked a bit more detail in some areas. It wasn't anything major and like I said, I understand the constrains your under to meet both challenge prompts.

All in all, this was a short and sweet look at a missing moment from the books. I thought you handled it really well.

Good job!

~Kaitlin

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Review #3, by alicia and anne The Walk To Your Beloved

30th August 2015:
YES! An A-Z challenge entry, I love seeing how people use the alphabet to write stories, and I'm always fascinated by how the letter X and Q are used :P

Awww this beginning is so adorable and I love how you've described her dress and her feelings so beautifully, it fits in so well and goes so smoothly together. Effortlessly beautiful descriptions!

Awww the way that James looks at her! He's so in love with her! It makes me so happy and I can't stop smiling. I just want to hug them and tell them how adorable they are!

That is a brilliant word for X that you used :P

This was so amazing! And you've done a fantastic job with writing it.

Just beautiful!

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Review #4, by Frankie05 The Walk To Your Beloved

23rd August 2015:
Hey Lauren,

This is magnificent. I love love love it. James and Lily are so cute and I love their wedding day. You did a fantastic job with both of the challenges. The short and sweet speaks to my fluffy heart and brings a smile to my face. I actually adore happy stories! And secondly the A-Z challenge can be quite difficult and I thought your writing made it look so easy and it flowed quite nicely. One of the things I loved about your story was the mixture of sentences. One word sentences to very long sentences. I loved it!

I also thought the descriptions were spot on, I could picture this moment happening perfectly.

Sad moment about Lily's mom :( but you handled it with grace and eloquence. I just thought it was well done.

You should write more, its beautiful! Also it is in second person!! I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE IT WAS SO WELL DONE. Hugs for miles because this was a beautiful way to reenter into the writing realm!! Good luck on the challenges :) I thought they were magnificent!

Frankie

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Review #5, by nott theodore The Walk To Your Beloved

22nd August 2015:
Lauren! ♥ ♥ ♥

Ah, I'm so excited that you've posted this story and that you've finally posted something again, because yay, it means you're writing again and maybe that means more updates on the way? :D

Anyway, you already know that I love this story, but I can't not come and leave you a review (even if this is on my phone so it may be shorter than what I would normally leave you, sorry!) because even if it wasn't your first new story in ages, it is amazing and it deserves lots of love and attention!

Also oh my God, you're the sweetest! ♥ I can't believe this is for me, Lauren, as if I didn't love it enough already! This is seriously so exciting, even though I don't deserve it because I've done nothing but poke and prod you over the last year :P

This story... It was brilliant. Really, truly brilliant, Lauren. I honestly think that this story shows your writing at its best - for someone who hasn't written much in the last year, you've improved so much and this was such high quality. Your words flowed so well, the pace was perfect, and the word choice was great - the language was so varied and interesting and you couldn't help but love it. Normally something sticks out to me as I read, like a phrase which doesn't quite fit or flow, and there was none of that here at all.

I know that this story was written for the A to Z challenge, and I've already said that I didn't realise that until I was reading it for a second time, because your story flows so well. The language choice is great - there's nothing at all which is clumsy or awkward, even in the most difficult letters. I'm so impressed with the way that you managed that, because it's not an easy task at all, and it's just so impressive!

Lily ♥ I absolutely loved her as the protagonist of this story, and your characterisation of her was just so great. You really captured her so well, with her love for James. the eagerness to be married to him and yet the nerves and the strangeness about getting ready to get married, and then the moments with her father and remembrance of her mother on this really important day. This was such a short story and yet at the same time, you managed to fill it with so many little details and touches that made this so much more believable and interesting.

The moment between Lily and her dad was just so sweet. I'm so glad that you included it and that you wrote it so well - we know that both her parents had died before Harry was orphaned but this plays on that detail and really brings it out into something that's important in the story. It was sad to think of her having to celebrate the biggest day of her life without her mother, but I'm glad that she had her dad there and the moment they shared was so touching.

You also captured her love for James and her eagerness to marry him brilliantly. I loved how excited she was to get to the altar and marry James and just be with him - it showed how sure she was of her decision and the fact that she wanted to marry him more than anything. I loved the moments together when they saw each other and the way you really showed how much they loved and cared for each other.

And Sirius and Remus were just great! I loved the idea of him officiating at the wedding - I've never seen that before in fanfiction and it's such a great way of having him included in the ceremony as well as Sirius, who we know was best man. I loved seeing them both included and your characterisation of them!

This was such a great story, Lauren! I'm sorry this review wasn't longer but I love your version of James and Lily (and will always live them!) and this was such a sweet, fluffy and adorable story! ♥ thank you so much for sharing this!

Sian :)

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Review #6, by TidalDragon The Walk To Your Beloved

22nd August 2015:
Howdy Lauren! I saw you posted something new, and of course, I had to come offer encouragement in the way of a review!

One thing that was interesting right off the bat is the manner in which you chose to tackle the A-Z aspect of the story. I've seen it done a number of different ways, from separate lines, to a mixture, to zero stand-alones and I have to say I enjoyed the way you did it. Except for Lily's name (which was a cool thing to choose to highlight in that way), you did the blend method. Personally, I always appreciate it being handled that way most of all because if it weren't for the summary, if the word choice is good enough, you don't even notice it until later (my personal idea of how the best entries would handle that A-Z component).

Now for the meat! First, I really liked the way you varied your sentence length in the first couple of paragraphs. I think it matches the nerves Lily would be experiencing right before she walks down the aisle and also keeps an ultimately reflective piece from immediately settling into the long-winded descriptions and introspection that are so typical of wedding day stories/chapters. Then, though you got longer as the story wore on, you made sure that the all the "necessary" elements - the dress, the father, the groomsmen, the music - made it into the story, but without letting them distract focus from the overall aim and tone.

Excited to see you writing again!

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Review #7, by CambAngst The Walk To Your Beloved

22nd August 2015:
Hi, Lauren! I saw your status update and I was excited to come check out what you'd posted. If I may, let me quickly keep count of where I am with the August review NaNo.

GryCReMo (Review #25)

The moment that Lily and her father share was melt-worthy. His reaction is short and says everything that needs to be said. It's perfect. It's such a shame that Lily's mother wasn't able to share this day with them, but they have one another.

I think everyone deserves to have that moment that Lily and James share when he sees her at the other end of the aisle. A moment where the rest of the world ceases to exist and there's a time where it feels like you're the only two people that exist. It's magical.

I love the scene that you created for the Potters' wedding and I love the fact that they simply couldn't resist kissing one another before the ceremony even gets started. Some people put far too much stock in rules and traditions. For two people who were destined to die far too young, it's nice to see that they didn't waste a moment.

Your writing was fantastic. My compliments to you and your beta reader on a beautiful, smooth, error-free read. Great job!

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Review #8, by Unicorn_Charm The Walk To Your Beloved

22nd August 2015:
Hey Lauren! I saw this on the forums and thought that I'd take a peek, since you said it's been a while since you posted. :)

First I have to tell you that I'm laughing, and not because of your beautiful story, because it was wonderful. I'm laughing because I wrote their wedding from James' POV for the same two challenges! :p Total brain twin moment!

But to your story! :)

I loved it! I was so cute and fluffy and you could truly feel Lily's nervous excitement and love for James. It all flowed gorgeously, too! If I didn't know this was for the A-Z challenge, I wouldn't have known it was for that challenge. It all came together seamlessly. :)

I loved the little bits of personality you've thrown in, like her saying she was on time for once, or how she would playfully tease her father about ruining her makeup. It's little things like that which make her relatable and feel like a real person.

It's totally appropriate that Sirius would have nudged James, or that wolf whistling would have occurred. It made it feel like a Marauder wedding. I mean, would anyone expect those boys to behave themselves? :p

The ceremony sounded beautiful and Lily just seemed so happy and in love. It made me feel all squishy and full of warm fuzzies. ♥

I really enjoyed reading this! I loved seeing Lily's perspective. :D Wonderful job on this, my dear!!

xoxo Meg

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Review #9, by CassiePotter The Walk To Your Beloved

22nd August 2015:
Hello! I'm here for our review swap!
This story was so, so lovely! I just adored it. I thought you did a wonderful job focusing on all the emotions of the moments leading up to James and Lily's wedding, and I think it was really impressive that you were able do all of that in such a short piece. I loved that you showed Lily's impatience to get married, and then had a more serious moment with her father, because showing just how much love there is between her and James when she finally walks down the aisle to him. I have to say, I LOVE that you had Remus officiating the wedding! I've never seen that done before, but I think it fits so perfectly!
This story just read so smoothly, and was really, really sweet. I really enjoyed it! Thank you for the swap!
Cassie :)

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