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Reading Reviews for This Bird Has Flown
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Giu9_RedandGold a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

19th July 2017:
This one-shot is one of the best things I've ever read on HPFF! I found it a long time ago and have read it many times ever since. I just now realised that I had never left a review, so here I am, just to say that both characters are so fascinating and you managed to make them interesting in a very short piece of writing and their chemistry is perfect!

I am dying to know if you are ever going to write that short story sequel! If you do, I'll definitely read it!! ;)

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Review #2, by Dark Whisper a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

30th January 2017:
Hello, Crestwood!
Congrats on your Dobby nomination!
This was really adorable. I generally don't read too much Next Gen, but was quite pleased with this one-shot. Not much is written about Lucy either, I don't believe.
Anyway, I loved your characterization of Scorpius as bit of a quiet wanderer who enjoys a little bit of fun chaos on the side. And truly I loved Lucy's place. A bit of odd things, messy, no chairs says much about her personality.
I love dialogue and in-depth conversation, you did well here and somehow they ended up drunk, but not in bed. Kudos on being refreshingly different these days!
You painted a lovely picture of how people realistically begin meaningful relationships.
I also loved his little letter. It is short, but speaks volumes.

Again I say, Congrats!
Dark Whisper

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Review #3, by DossyVilja a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

20th January 2017:
Now, this was great! Thanks for writing it, I really liked reading :) It's great that you write about Lucy, she is a cannon character that is only mentioned, but we know nothing about her. Congratulations on the Dobby nominations btw! ;-)

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Review #4, by Felpata Lupin a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

6th September 2015:
Great thinking of Roisin, then... Ahahah! Bloody Merlin definitely made me chuckle!!! And I loved the pub's name, too! ;)

But... What about my manners???
Hello, Joseph, and happy (very belated) birthday!!!

I really enjoyed reading this!
Both Scorpius and Lucy seem very peculiar and interesting characters!

I loved his carelessness and her wild mind. And I really enjoyed the description of her apartment, cause it fits so well with her personality! :)

I loved the little snippets you gave us of their conversation, because it was so funny and so deep and serious at the same time. Especially the part about human's nature. Scorpius' opinion matches perfectly with my own, btw!

Sorry for the very quick review, and thank you again for the lovely reading!!!
Hope you had a great birthday!!!
With love,
Chiara

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Review #5, by alicia and anne a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

30th August 2015:
JOEY! JOEY! JOEY! BROSEPH! JOEY!!

Now that I've gotten that out of the way, I can begin my review!

That's the main reason I go drinking as well Scorpius, because I don't know what I'm doing with my life either.

Although, that bar just sounds like it's going to be all kinds of shabby haha. Of course I would enter immediately as well.

I hope that he takes part in the trivia, and wins some prizes... ALL OF THE PRIZES!!!

I love how Lucy stated how she knew it was Scorpius just by looking at him, but then admitted it was because they were in the same house at Hogwarts haha.

I love how she's just chatting about random things! It's brilliant! :D She changes the subject so quickly!

Lucy just sounds so amazing! I am loving her! She's so eccentric and her flat sounds awesome

Aw! They fell asleep in the tub and he wants to see her again! I love this!!

Ahhh I can't wait for more! I am so excited right now!

THIS IS FANTASTIC!

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Review #6, by DaaOne a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

15th August 2015:
Hiya

I'm here with a review :D

So this one is interesting ! featuring Scorpius and Lucy ! I guessed it had to be a challenge (I never read the summary before the story ! bad habit ? I think not !) Summaries are sometimes too revealing so I tend to skip those haha !

So this is one interesting one shot ! I mean there are loads of questions I could ask you about Lucy and Scorpius after reading this but I'm sure you already know them !

I like the dialogue and the description you have written for the different scenes. And I like how fast it all unraveled ! But it just felt suiting to the story ! That is how I feel

I did pick up a few mistakes (grammar, wording..) here and there but you can fix those if you proof read your story again.

I think it would be interesting for this to develop into a short story as most one-shots don't just end there ! haha

I have to say, this story amused me very much and I liked how the characters just sort of went along with it ! It made me just go with it as well !!

Well I hope this review helps ^^ and if ever you need another one just drop by :D I'm always in the mood for reading short stories

Hugs

Doe

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Review #7, by Tonks1247 a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

15th August 2015:
Heya!

I was creeping around the forums earlier today and opened a bunch of links to stories I found as I went. I’ve been on a bit of an R&R kick for the past couple days so I decided to add some random stories to the list tonigh, and it just so happens I found the link to this story!

That said, I quite enjoyed this story! The style of it was a lot different than many of the stories I’ve read recently and it was really refreshing! It was rather dialogue heavy, but you managed the dialogue in a smooth fashion that made it easy to read. It also helps that your narration was so natural and so distinct as Scorpius. I mean, it’s third person point of view but the way the story read made it seem more personal. It sounded voiced from his character, or the view I got from his character, which was really, really lovely.

His voice also helped walk me through his night. It was easy to see him walking into this pub and taking a moment to try to figure out why all these gruff and eccentric men were as lively as they were. I could see his draw into the place and the need to sit and people watch, as one of the best things is people watching.

I love the interaction between Lucy and Scorpius as well. It’s almost got an edge of awkward to it, but at the same time, it doesn’t. Like, I don’t exactly know how to put words to how the conversation felt, but it was very fitting of those two characters and I feel like I got to know a lot about them based on how they spoke and what they said. It was pretty impressive, as I haven’t read much of Lucy’s character, but from what my head cannon is, you’ve written her entirely different. (Which is awesome, don’t get me wrong! The way you described her, I can definitely see it and it’s just as fitting as what I think of her, if that makes any sense at all.)

I also love how you describe the place where Lucy lives and how she doesn’t have rooms and just a ton of those little details. It really says something about her character and I can see where Scorpius’ fascination is. I also love how you leave the end sort of open, with Scorpius leaving her a note. It’s really intriguing.

There were two small things that I noticed:

“She crumbled up her piece of paper that she was so enthralled in minutes before.” –I think here, crumpled may work better than crumbled

“What of was anyone’s guess.” It could totally be a style thing, but I think ‘Of what’ works a little better than ‘what of’.

Overall though, I really enjoyed this story! It was different and it gave me a much different view of Lucy and of Scorpius. It was quite lovely!

And I will leave off with one of my favourite quotes from this story:

“I wanted to read two very specific books that didn’t exist, so I wrote them myself.”

-Mikaela

(OH! I also loved the chapter title! XD)

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Review #8, by Penelope Inkwell a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

14th August 2015:
Hey! Penny here. Thought I'd jot over and take a look at this, as I'm trying to check out more of the Slythertastic work of my fellow snakes!

This was really cute!

You do a very nice job with descriptions. I especially enjoyed the way you described the area outside Lucy's flat. It was very easy to imagine.

You gave Scorpius and Lucy a really unique vibe. They seem to be looking for someone who can surprise them, and it seems like they've found a bit of that in one another.

Okay, I didn't know the song "Norwegian Wood (The Bird Has Flown)", but now that I've looked it up I can see that you took a song with very little detail and expanded on its "plot". It went right with the song, but you added some real adorableness it it.

I particularly liked this exchange:

“You can sit anywhere you’d like.” Lucy rummaged through her cabinets.

Scorpius surveyed the room, unsure if he’d missed something. "There aren't any seats."

"That's why I said you can sit anywhere,” she said.

--Heehee. Cute.

Overall, I'm kinda feeling this Lucy/Scorpius thing. I could ship it. :D

Nice work.

CC:

She led him into the tiny town where he assumed she lived. Although, referring to it as a town was being a bit generous.
--"town" seems to be a bit of an odd word choice here. Maybe "neighborhood"? But it could just be a Britishism I'm not familiar with!

He pried himself onto his feet, walking out into her the bedroom.
--"walking out into her bedroom" or "walking out into the bedroom". You only need one of them.

Thanks for the fun read!

--Penny

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Review #9, by UnluckyStar57 a cynic and an idealist walk into a bar

14th August 2015:
Hi Joey! It's about time I read something of yours again, and since this is at the top of the Recently Added list, I call first review! ;)

So ships other than Scorpius/Rose, involving either of those two but not the other, are the hidden gems that slip between the cracks in the fanfiction realm. Scorpius/Lucy is a cool one because it can be anything, depending on the characters themselves.

This is incredible, though, because I can tell that Scorpius and Lucy are so very different from each other that it's going to be very interesting to watch their acquaintanceship (and eventually romantic relationship, maybe?) grow. You've done such a good job with setting everything up--the atmosphere of the Grindylow is so weird and dingy (at least, it seems that way), and it goes a long way to start the whole thing off.

So is Scorpius the "bird that has flown" in this situation? He says that he doesn't like hanging around in places for very long, so it makes me think that he's the one who would leave Lucy to go experience other places and other types of alcohol. But Lucy also seems like a bird in a different way--but her escape from the "reality" or "mundanity" of her situation is through the mind.

Ooh, I wanna talk about your narration here, too. It's very interesting to me that it starts off with a narrator who is somewhat involved in things, as you said "I suppose that was one of the major reasons..." in the beginning of the whole thing. But then the narration sort of subsides throughout the dialogue and when it comes back, it seems more like third person limited in which the narrator isn't going to have any input. So I'm wondering which one it really is? Is the narrator someone that Scorpius knows, or maybe Scorpius himself, looking back on this first meeting with Lucy? If not, you might want to think about reworking that first sentence so that the "I" isn't present anymore.

That being said, I really enjoyed the tone that you used for this. The narration really pulls me into the scene--a pub called the Grindylow having trivia night? I like the way you think! It seems so wacky that such an interesting spot would have a trivia night that the regulars would really get involved in, but that's one of the surprising things about trivia nights--people really care about them in certain locales.

And the dialogue was all spot-on. I could always tell who was saying what, and I really appreciate how Lucy was so nonchalant about Scorpius sitting at her table. I think he thought that it was going to matter a lot, like she would make him leave because she wanted to be alone, but no. He was instantly welcomed in to this really vibrant and wacky girl's life.

Ooh, also I love that Lucy wrote two books simply because she wanted to read them. I aspire to Lucy's level of productivity and perseverance, even if no one reads her books.

Ahaha, I'm super excited about the note that Scorpius left for Lucy, because it means that they're inevitably going to meet again and more madcap romping will occur! Question: Did I miss what House they were in at Hogwarts, or was it purposefully kept a secret? I would like to know, because right now I suspect that they were Ravenclaws (because of the bird imagery and stuff), and I want to commend you for writing Ravenclaws in a non-stereotypical way. (And how they could both possibly represent the different facets of the House that no one ever bothers to mention because they're too caught up in the "studious Ravens" stereotype.) But if they aren't Ravenclaws, please ignore my bad guessing. :)

Thanks for writing this brilliant and interesting story! I've only ever watched half of Pulp Fiction, but I can see how this was inspired by some of it. And I really can't wait for that short story of yours!!

♥Mallory

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