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Reading Reviews for Boarding the Train
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by TreacleTart The End in the Middle

25th January 2016:
Hey Lizzie!

Back for another Gryffindor REview Battle Review! Go Team Red!

This chapter felt a lot darker then the last one. I mean obviously a large part of that was Colin's final memory in this chapter, but even the other memories were a lot sadder and more bitter.

Here the poor guy finally gets lucky and meets a girl he's head over heels with and then his dad has to go and tear him back down to earth. Even worse, then he has to leave her without saying goodbye and knowing that she'll probably hate him because she'll think he used her. Then there's all the memories of the awful things that happened at Hogwarts and the Snatchers attacking them. And then the ending. Gahhh. Lizzie...how could you do that to me? Seriously. Way to just gut punch me in the feels. As if this story wasn't tragic enough with the main character being a dead 16 year old.

Okay, that being said, I really do love this story and I hope you'll update it soon. Your author's note saysyou have the next chapter completely written, so I implore you to post it soon!

Great job here!

~Kaitlin

P.S. Still no real theories on who this girl is, but I'm still wondering why Colin's parents haven't greeted him at King's Cross.

Author's Response: Kaitlin!

Sadly, this story really only gets darker from here on out. Sorry! :(

Colin's life really sucks, doesn't it? I'm so horrible to him.

"As if this story wasn't tragic enough with the main character being a dead 16 year old" -- Haha! That's actually a funny (and quite accurate) point. Just one more reason to hate me for this story. :P

Don't worry, the question of who the little girl is and where his parents are will definitely get answered! It's one of those things that I'm keeping a secret for the time being. :P

Thanks again for your amazing reviews, Kaitlin!! I'm so glad that you like this story! It'll definitely get finished this summer, because it's next on my list to finish after A Box of Chocolates!

Keep being amazing!
Lizzie


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Review #2, by TreacleTart The Beginning in the End

25th January 2016:
Hey Lizzie,

Here for another Gryffie Review Battle Review! Go Team Red!

I'm so excited to see that this is an afterlife story! I love seeing the different concepts that people come up with for what happens after death. Add to that having Colin as the main character and you've already sold me on this!

I thought that you balanced the moments that Colin remembered really well. It was sad seeing him remembering some of the struggles, but I also enjoyed seeing some of his happier moments too. I know in your author's note you said you were concerned that it was too light, but I actually thought it was just the right tone. I really like that it wasn't just solidly depressing.

The little girl was pretty odd and sort of bugging me because she wouldn't give Colin any info, but I suppose she can't give out info that she doesn't have. At this point, I have absolutely no clue who she is.

Fred's brief appearance was sad because it means he's dead, but I was happy that he found his uncles (Fabian and Gideon) right? That's who the two red heads who were waiting for him were, right? And I'm glad he had a moment to see Colin as well.

But that's just given me a sad thought. How come there are people there to greet Fred, but no one there for Colin? Don't tell me his mother didn't make it into the afterlife! I don't think I could handle that.

Anyway, this is a great start! Definitely write more of this!

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: Kaitlin!!

Oh gosh, this story is so unoriginal when it comes to an afterlife story. I totally cheated and followed JK's ideas because I had none of my own. :( I tried to add my own twist to it though, so hopefully that comes across!

Ah! I'm glad you liked the tone of this! I guess lighter is better for a first chapter, huh? Better to ease you into the dark stuff later...

Haha! The little girl is frustratingly cryptic, isn't she? Hopefully the reveal of who she is at the end will make her less obnoxious... :\

Yup! Fabian and Gideon were there to meet Fred! I kinda liked that even though he never really knew them well, he was still able to recognize them and find family to help him through the transition that is ahead for him.

Ah, I'm afraid I can't answer that because it'd be a big spoiler! Just know that you're right to question it, and it WILL be answered. In 3rd chapter, I think. Maybe.

But don't worry, that question will get an answer!

Thank you for ANOTHER fantastic review, Kaitlin! You are phenomenal!!
Lizzie


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Review #3, by MargaretLane The End in the Middle

3rd August 2015:
Apologies for the delay in getting to this. I wanted to be sure I wouldn't forget it when the other entries came in. AND July is a CRAZY busy month for me.

Hmm, I really wonder who this little girl is.

I guess this must be really hard for Colin's father. He's the adult; he must feel it's his job to protect his sons, but in this situation he is completely out of his depth. He doesn't even know the full details of what's going on and he certainly has no way of fighting them.

I find it a little surprising Colin didn't tell his father sooner, but then I find it surprising Fudge didn't get a string of complaints about Umbridge from various parents.

I really like the way Colin responds to his father's anger. He's under so much pressure.

You've written "Creevey's" when it should be "Creeveys."

Hmm, I guess the reason they are going to so much trouble to find them is because they think they might have some link to Harry.

Yikes, I didn't expect that to happen to Nicholas. Poor Colin; he's bound to blame himself. After all, if he and Derek hadn't been wizards none of this would have happened. It probably wouldn't even if they hadn't accepted their places at Hogwarts. Of course, they couldn't know and there's very little he can do about being born with magic, but I would still imagine it would feel like his fault. Poor boy.

Author's Response: Margaret!

No worries about the delay - it's taken me far longer to respond to this!

Ah, the little girl. You will find out in the end, once I get around to posting the rest of it. I don't think you'll be expecting it though. ;)

When I was coming up with the plot for this story, I came up with them being on the run, and then realized that Colin's father would've really had no idea what was going on or what to do, and I can imagine that it would frustrate him to no end - especially because he was seeing his son take on a burden he wouldn't have wanted him to have, and wouldn't be able to do anything about it.

I figured that Colin probably didn't tell his father about Umbridge because he didn't want to worry Nicholas. But by the time this is happening, everything is much much worse, so revealing it wouldn't really do more harm.

Ah, thanks for that correction - I shall fix it when I update next.

Yeah, Nicholas dying was a necessary evil I think. I honestly couldn't figure out a way in which he would survive the scenario. I mean, if he was left behind, then the Death Eaters would have caught up to him and killed him, and since I needed Colin and Dennis to get captured for the sake of the plot, I figured he wouldn't survive that either because he's a muggle. :( Sad, huh? I wish it didn't have to go that way, but alas, it just is (at least, in my brain).

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, Margaret! I'm glad you're enjoying this story so far!!
Lizzie


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Review #4, by Your Personal Birthday Owl The End in the Middle

27th July 2015:
you know, there's a saying where I'm from that goes like this:

Aller guten Dinge sind Drei!

It roughly translate to Of all good things, there's always three.

That's why I'm back again. Even though Owls don't get acne.

This chapter is much sadder than the last one. I really wish with all my heart that Collin could have had a nice long life without any more trouble than deciding where to take Daniela for dinner on Friday night. It would have been a lovely life with lots of magic and lots of pictures, and memories. maybe he would have become a photographer for the Daily Prophet or another (less trashy) newspaper.

The fight between Colin and his Dad was to be expected. I guess it's normal to not expect the most horrible dark wizard of all time to come after your fifteen and sixteen year old sons.

Grayback and his gang of bullies are probably the worst snatchers out there, becuase that guy is absolutely ruthless. I always find my hands grow cold and my breathing become shallow whenever he appears somewhere in a story.

Poor, poor Dennis (and Colin). This is a horrible way to lose a father, something that's tragic in the best of circumstances. And then Colin dies too. who's going to look after poor Dennis after this? I wonder if he needs a pet owl to keep him company?

I look forward to reading the next chapter of this.

Until then, enjoy the rest of YOUR special day and find me if you feel like it.

Yours,

Your Personal Birthday Owl


PS. If you didn't realize, google can actually figure out what language that saying on the top is (and the language may be a hint for you)

Author's Response: HAHAHA! It took me quite a bit longer than it should have to get why you said that owls don't get acne. It also made me laugh much more than it probably should have.

See? I said it'd get sadder! (Although I am replying two months after the fact, but we'll just pretend that it doesn't matter.)

I wish Colin could have lived too! It broke my heart to have him and Daniela's relationship start and end so quickly.

I felt like the argument between Colin and his father not long before his death would make a larger impact than it would have if everything had been peachy between them.

Don't worry about Dennis. He'll have someone to take care of him. :)

Thanks so much for your reviews Anja! I'm so amazed at how many of my stories you've read and reviewed! It's just fantastic!

Lizzie


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Review #5, by Your Personal Birthday Owl The Beginning in the End

27th July 2015:
hello again dear Lizzie,

Don't you just love two Birthday reviews even more than one?

Have you found me yet? I guess you haven't, so here's a little help.

Take the second of seven,
the one who cares for the dragon,
He's recently been on my mind,
A story about him you'll find.
The 'Blue Gold' is what's important to me,
I travel far just to see the sea.
My love for numbers is evident here,
I'm sure you know that I'm an engineer.
Now find me, and tell me, do,
and I may have something else for you.

I've recently discovered that Gryffindor students appear to be very good at solving riddles, so this shouldn't be too hard for you.

I've expected something much sadder than this here, but it works well for Collin. I can't wait to see who the little girl is.

I love that Collin sees a train station just as Harry does, it seems like a very plausible way of passing on. it also doesn't surprise me that Fred sees Diagon Alley, because he's not a Muggleborn, he would probably associate the passage with something else. I love that they don't both see the same thing, because dying seems to be a very personal experience and it should be different for everyone.

It's so lovely that you have decided to have someone there for every person who arrives, just as Dumbledore was there for Harry.

Collin's life is very interesting. We don't know too much about it, so I really like exploring it through your eyes. He's had a tough last year... I would have loved to see him alive and happy after the battle. His death hurt me a lot back when I was still an egg and my mother read the stories to me, but of course my cousin Hedwig's passing hurt me even more.

I really want to find out how this story is progressing in the next chapter, so I'll leave you to it for now.

yours,
Your Personal Birthday Owl

Author's Response: MORE birthday reviews! My heart gets all warm and fuzzy every time I read these. :)

I thought it'd be much sadder as well, but I'll warn you, it WILL get worse. :(

The little girl definitely won't be who you might expect it is, just a warning. :P

You're absolutely right about the difference between what Fred sees and what Colin sees. That's exactly what I was going for!

Thanks again for reviewing Anja! You're amazing and these reviews definitely make me smile!

Lizzie


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Review #6, by May The End in the Middle

16th June 2015:
I'm enjoying your story but found it sad that Colin's dad was bitten

Author's Response: May!

I'm so glad you're liking this story!!

Unfortunately, it only gets a sadder from here on out! But I hope you enjoy the story anyway!

Thanks for R&R'ing!!
LL


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Review #7, by MargaretLane The Beginning in the End

15th June 2015:
Hmm, I wonder who the little girl is.

His being smaller than the girls is hardly surprising. Girls and boys are more or less the same average height in primary school.

Love the way you show how he coped so well with the various difficulties he faced as a child and young teenager and how Dumbledore's death caused him to reassess everything. It makes sense that Dumbledore dying would have that effect as he really seemed undefeatable.

I thought Muggleborns weren't allowed attend Hogwarts once the Carrows took over, that the mandatory attendance only applied to purebloods and halfbloods.

Really like the way Colin's father doesn't understand the situation. It DOES seem rather ridiculous if you're not familiar with it - that an organisation would go to so much trouble to track down a couple of kids for no reason other than their genetic traits.

And I like the obvious difference in maturity between Colin and Derek. Even though they are only two years apart in age - probably less as Colin appears to be one of the youngest in his year - that's a lot when one is 16 and the other 14.

You'd think they'd be safe if they've escaped Britain, but I guess Voldemort DID hole up in Albania at one point, so there are no guarantees.

Love the way Fred argues that he's not dead. That's VERY in character, as is his turning up where he's not supposed to be. Even if it is an accident, it's hardly surprising.

I have NO idea who the girl is. His mother maybe?

Author's Response: Margaret!

Wow! You got here and reviewed this FAST! I'm impressed!!

I think that Dumbledore's death definitely affected him, but I think the scarier moment for him would be when he sees Harry breaking down. Nothing brings you down to earth like watching your hero fall.

The mandatory attendance actually applied to EVERYONE, but any Muggleborns who showed up were immediately taken away and imprisoned. Either in Azkaban, or elsewhere. That's why a lot of older Muggleborns ran. They knew what would happen, whereas the younger ones were taken off right away.

Really terrible. (FYI, this is mentioned in the seventh book when Harry realizes that some of the first year Muggleborns would show up at school, excited to learn about magic, only to be whisked off to prison for no apparent reason.)

Colin's Dad definitely reacts the way I could imagine a lot of Muggles would if they were on the run from something so unknown. Not trusting Colin on this actually turns out to be extremely dangerous for them.

Dennis is very heavily protected by Colin, as well as their father. I don't think he's ignorant to the realities of what is happening, but he hasn't faced them head on, and I don't think he's prepared for it either.

But Colin has been forced to grow up much faster than he should of. Umbridge has a pretty big impact on that.

I actually thought that if they left the country, they wouldn't be safe because Voldemort's control over Ministry resources would quickly catch them. If they use any magic, they could be found, if they say Voldemort, they could be found, and if their names showed up on an airplane ticket, or their passport at an international checkpoint, I'd be fairly confident that the Ministry would be keeping tabs on that too.

Magic. It's pretty powerful.

Hehehe, Fred. I couldn't help but add him in there. It just needed to be done.

Hmmm, that's a nice guess... you'll just have wait and find out I'm afraid. :D

Thanks for R&R'ing Margaret!! I really appreciate it and I absolutely loved writing for your challenge!! (also, you'll get to see more of the on the run stuff in the next two chapters than this one)

Thanks again!
LL


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Review #8, by May The Beginning in the End

14th June 2015:
I think the little girl maybe is mother it's so nice to read a story about Colin and what he and his family did leading up to the war

Author's Response: May!

Hm, that's an interesting theory. You'll have to wait for a couple more chapters before you find out though, so I hope you stick around to figure it out!

And I'm glad you like Colin's story. He's one of my favorite characters from the books.

Thanks so much for reading!!
LL


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