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Reading Reviews for Tempestuous Conditions
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Slytherin Eagle W-Who Am I? (June 1995)

13th July 2015:
Hey Karen, sorry I took so long to do this.

First off I'd just like to say that I was really impressed by this entry. Although I didn't place it, I think this was a very strong entry in the challenge. You captured the theme of the challenge well and the whole story was very well put together.

Towards the end of the story I was a little bit confused about who was speaking (his consciousness or his wife) but I assume it was himself. Apart from that, the story flowed nicely and was easy to read.

I look forward to the rest of the chapters in this story. I will definitely be checking back regularly to see them!

Thanks for your entry, and sorry once again for taking so long to get this out to you,

Lea xx

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Review #2, by cherry_pop94 W-Who Am I? (June 1995)

10th July 2015:
Hi again! Here for our second swap!

I love how much attention you give to the 'bad guys!' I've always thought villains were so much more interesting, so I'm glad to have found your author's page!

I've never read anything about Barty Crouch Sr before (or Barty Crouch Jr), but I think you've done just a wonderful job with these characters here. I think you really get a feel for Barty Crouch Sr's regrets in life. He does love his son and wife, but he just messed up over and over again. And now, it's costing him his life.

The flashbacks were really well done as well. They don't disrupt the flow of current events and add to the overall emotion of this piece. I really loved the interactions between Barty and his life. There's just so much love there, but it's all very complicated and difficult with their son in prison.

It seems almost like death is doing Barty a favour here. I mean, he didn't have much to live for to be honest. It's very tragic, but the emotions you've pulled here just make it seem so very real. You're a very talented writer.

Thanks so much for sharing this and I can't wait for the next chapter!


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Review #3, by Felpata Lupin W-Who Am I? (June 1995)

29th June 2015:
Dear Karen...
No, this was anything but hilarious... I think I let a couple of tears escape while reading...
First of all, let me tell you that your writing is beautiful! I felt just so captured by it, I really empathized with Barthemius. I loved how you alternated present moments and memories, the confusion, the broken sentences. You just gave this the perfect style!
As for the story itself, well... You've read my blog post, so you can imagine how touchy parental theme is for me... I've never really given much thought to the Crouchs, but reading your stories I just can't get over how tragic their story is...
I love Barty's mother. She's just pure love. And it is so horrible that she went through such a terrible sacrifice for nothing. The scene in Azkaban was probably the most heartbreaking of all...
To cut it short, Karen, I adored this! Wonderful job, honey!
Tons of hugs and love,

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Review #4, by LadyL8 W-Who Am I? (June 1995)

6th June 2015:
Hi Karen ♥

I'm sorry it's taken me a while, but my computer wouldn't cooperate yesterday. It kept cutting off my reviews or making the formatting look really strange, but I think the problem should be fixed now - I hope so at least. I have looked forward to reading, because, as you know, I've entered that challenge too. And I think it's so interesting to see the different ways people solve the challenge, and you've done a little differently from me, I can already tell, so it'll be really interesting to read it.

Wow. You got Barty Crouch Sr. And I thought I had a tough one with Broderick Bode - no, this is definitely more difficult to make work. But you did. I really felt like it was Barty Crouch - it was just so belivable, and I loved how you connected his death to his wife as well as his son. And the promise they made to her - I LOVED when Winky mentioned how they both broke it at the same time - in one night. God, this was really good. I loved it - his death was more complicated than you'd initially think, because of his wife and his son and how they switched places.

It was sort of strange to see his son not wanting to switch places with his mother - believable yes, but very strange because you don't see much of that side of him in the books. I always believed he was very close with his mother, but resented father - we actually know the latter, but you get the point. But I had the hardest time, when I read the books, understanding why he'd go back to Voldemort, after everything his mother had done for him. I just really didn't understand it back then, and I'm not sure if I do now either, but I liked seeing the impact that decision had on his father's life. I do think it must've been hard for him - working for the Ministry and then finding out your own son in a dangerous criminal.

This is going to sound a bit strange, but I liked the 'drip, drip, drip'-s. I've always been a fan of including sounds - you've read my entry, so you know I have sounds in it too. I just think it makes it even more alive, like everything is happening before you - you can see, feel and hear everything they hear, and that just makes it easy to put yourself in the character's place.

In some ways, our entries aren't that different at all. We both add new things to characters from the books - for obvious reasons I have more new stuff than you, but that's just because my character hardly makes an appearance in the books (and that made it so difficult to write him - I really couldn't understand him as a character). We both focus on their death (obviously, that was what the challenge was all about), and we both try to make the reader sympathise with the character - I can't speak for my entry, but I think you've succeded in it.

The biggest difference between our entries are the POV. I've done 2nd person's narrative, as you know, but I enjoyed reading from 3rd perspective. I often feel like there's more description when you write in 3rd person's narrative, and it often makes the story more picturable (is that a word? :P) - as in I often think it's easier to picture it happening in my head. So that's really were we have chosen differently, but I think both can work just as well. In fact, my entry was orginally in 3rd person's narrative, but I changed it halfway in. So it'll be interesting to see how we'll do in the challenge, but I definitely think you'll do well because this is a very good story.



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