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Reading Reviews for felt
  
37 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Frankie05 Prologue

24th August 2015:
Carla,

this is such an fantastic take on blood supremacy and I can't wait to continue reading it! Naturally it was a Malfoy that had the idea of this law, but Im curious - his thoughts were just on his family or on the wizarding world as a whole? Muggleborns would die out and that is why Hermione was mad or what? Maybe I am getting ahead of myself.

I seriously thought they were going to magically bind the law with their blood so that it could never be broken! but they did some crazy awesome magic and then in walks Cassandra, who seems like a totally BA and changes the law. She makes it disappear which is so interesting and then it shows up while Hermione is in the room 200 years later? CRAZY powerful witch that Cassandra - I like her!

I like that it is Hermione that finds the law and now how this thing where she is the one who needs to fix it (its in her blood to remedy bad situations) and I am so curious how this will go about. Plus it says it is a Draco/Hermione fic so that makes it even better!!! I'm excited to read it. Well done :)

Frankie

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Review #2, by EnigmaticEyes16 Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

12th June 2015:
BUT WHAT IS THE THE LAW!?

I seriously dislike being kept in the dark. But this story is very intriguing so far. I am definitely a fan.

It's nice seeing Hermione struggling for once, but I'm glad Harry took the initiative to help her by setting her up with Malfoy. I'm very curious about what he'll have to say about working with her, and very excited for the awkward meeting between Draco and Hermione that is sure to come.

I wonder what's going on with her and Ron though. It sounds a bit worse than she's letting on. I'm very curious to see what is happening there, and how her working with Draco will affect it as well. I really enjoyed the playfulness between Hermione and Harry though, along with their easy understanding of each other.

I am going to have to add this story to my reading list because I really want to know what happens. This is a wonderful story so far.

xxNix
House Cup 2015. Slytherin.

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Review #3, by EnigmaticEyes16 Prologue

11th June 2015:
Hi! This looked super interesting so I had to check it out, and it really is! I am very curious about this Cassandra and how she managed to change this terrible law. It had to have taken some nerve to break into the Ministry and do that. But what I really want to know is what the law said! Originally and after she changed it. I assume the original law had something to do with wiping out those not pure, but what could she have done to it to make it so even they would not want the law in the place? And why was she crying? I do have to wonder though, if she died and if the men who originally made the law are also dead, how is it that this law still managed to reappear? Wouldn't the magic they used have faded with the death of the castors?

And what is this random room with laws? How does that work? It just sounds like a bunch of envelopes with seals on shelves, and some are passed and some aren't... it seems like a very odd system and a tad bit unorganized.

And what DO we do now? I want to know. I'm gonna have to read on to find out!

xxNix
House Cup 2015. Slytherin.

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Review #4, by The Wolf Maid Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

29th May 2015:
Hello again Carla. I have escaped my Septa once more so I could read this next chapter. I am now currently hidden in the Godswood, in one of the trees might I add - my mother will never think to look here but my father is another story so I must do this quickly.

You still have not told me what the law says - I must know soon! I fear I cannot wait patiently for you to reveal this secret to me! But I guess it is this mystery that keeps bringing me back to this delightful tale - you are a very talented writer indeed - if only the men here would believe that a female wrote such a piece of ficton - they still believe only men can be educated and talented. I will be eagerly awaiting the next chapter!

Hermione seems to put a lot of pressure on herself but I feel as though this is her usual temperament. She sounds a lot like my Septa - she is constantly stressed but they may have something to do with me not attending my lessons and trying to sword fight with my brothers instead of learning needle-point. I have every faith in her she will stop this law though - she is a very strong woman and I believe she will do it.

Ah, I sense a deep dislike for this Draco character. (what kind of a name is Draco? He sounds like a forgotten Targaryen.) But she doesn't seem the type that hates irrationally so I believe there must be a history between them. she punched him? Hermione is most certainly a woman after my own heart. I do adore woman who can defend herself - who needs men to fight battles when us females can do the job ourselves?

But perhaps this Draco has changed? Harry, who seems a genuine and caring man, seems very insistent that Draco is not like he used to be. In my opinion, I struggle to believe people change but maybe she should give him the benefit of the doubt? She could just hit him again if he does something terrible.

Overall, I really enjoyed this chapter and I wish there was more to read. Alas, maybe it is a good thing there is no more as it is nearly dusk and I must sneak back into the castle without being caught.

I do have a clue for you before I go:

'to find my real identity, close to home you will have to go,
I may be a fellow 'Claw with an affinity for Jon Snow'

The Wolf Maid

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Review #5, by The Wolf Maid Prologue

26th May 2015:
Hello, dear Carla.

I would have shown up sooner but moonlighting as the Knight of the Laughing Tree takes up a lot of my free time and keeping it a secret from my brothers and father takes up the rest. But here I am finally and I cannot wait to review your enchanting mysterious story! I must admit I have never heard of this 'Dramione' but I cannot wait to read more about them!

I have to say, I may have read this a few times over – you’ve intrigued me with this mystery and I must know more! I haven’t read anything this exciting in what feels like forever – my Septa has me reading the history of Westeros but why would I want to read that when I could read this? I think even my Septa could overcome her innate boringness in order to read this tale.

I must know what that law says! I do not think I can manage not knowing what it says? That group of men at the beginning – they are scheming and dangerous – much like the men at King’s Landing – they say that is a pit of snakes, I feel as though those men would fit right in. And Cassandra, I like that it was a woman who came to the rescue, who sought to change the words of that law – it makes a change from all the tales I hear about heroic men in battle. She was brave and determined – much like myself if I do say so. It is about time women were the heroines of their own stories.

And this Hermione, I liked how you have portrayed her here. I feel as though she was at home amongst the books and archives and that this is what makes her happy? Although I do not particularly share her affinity with books, I admire her love and dedication to what she is doing. Integrating werewolves? I have only heard tales of the direwolves that roam our lands but although I do not know what these ‘werewolves’ are, I adore the way Hermione is fighting for them against a higher power. I dislike those who believe they are above people and I have once myself fought for those persecuted so Hermione has earned my respect and admiration for doing this. Is this Hermione an ancestor of Cassandra? Because they share many admirable traits.

I hate to does this but I must run, I am sure I can hear my brother’s searching for me – I may have missed a lesson with my Septa to read this wonderful story but I cannot wait to read more of this magical tale. You are an amazing writer, dear Carla!

The Wolf Maid

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Review #6, by Infinityx Prologue

18th May 2015:
Hi Carla! I'm here (finally) for our swap. I'm so sorry for the delay. I typed out a review and then lost it. :/

I am SO excited to see where you're going with this! The first chapter is so intriguing and mysterious, and it sets a perfect base for the fic.

I love how you begin with a setting that's two centuries earlier. It sets this really eerie atmosphere, especially with the group of Purebloods forming such a terrible law, and the way it seemed like such a cult. The whole scene just gave me chills with the way you've described it. CHILLS, CARLA.

I'm sorry, I'm not sure if there's something wrong with this sentence or if I just don't understand it. this law shall be filed and in two hundred years our ancestors will see it.
How will their ancestors see it? Shouldn't it be their descendants?

Hmm, it's interesting how they've filed it away to only be seen much, much later. I'm guessing it was so that they could protect themselves and ensure it's not traced back to them.

I love how there's that link between Septimus and Draco, and Cassandra and Hermione. It's a lovely parallel you've drawn and I can't wait to see how Hermione figures out how to negate this law!

Why does Cassandra only want someone to be able to change it twelve weeks before it's passed? Why not earlier, considering it's such a difficult law to change? Maybe you could include some more details about her motives behind this since I doubt she'd be making an appearance again.

I love the way you've written Hermione. Her characterization is perfect and I absolutely LOVE how she's researching on werewolves for three hours straight. And that bit about her not knowing what to do really gives emphasis on how intricate this law really is. I'd love to read a bit more about the law itself and Cassandra's motives. Maybe you could bring that into one of the later chapters somehow? :)

Brilliant first chapter, Carla! I'm sorry if you found this review a bit harsh. I loved it and you're amazing!

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Review #7, by Beeezie Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

15th May 2015:
Hi, Carla! Back for BvB! ♥

I really enjoy what you did with this chapter. I think that you're a little evil for not taking us off the hook for what exactly the law says, but I guess wanting to know so bad is the mark of a good chapter (and a good writer, of course!).

Your portrayal of Hermione was perfect. The way she's approaching the law is so reminiscent of the way we saw Hermione approach pretty much any much problem in the series: with rapt attention and significant anxiety, sometimes to the exclusion of everything else.

Though - the bit at the end about her and Ron also made me wonder whether a rough patch in her relationship was contributing to her focus on the law. I mean, it sounds like she'd be focusing regardless, but it's not at all uncommon for people to use work to hide from trouble in their relationships.

I also appreciated the way that she was a little more hesitant about trusting Draco than Harry was. That makes sense to me, as they've moved forward - I think that Harry saw a little more of Draco in HBP and DH that helped lay the groundwork for getting past the hard feelings to some extent and giving Draco a chance to change, where Hermione (and Ron, of course) weren't privy to the same information.

I did initially wonder why you had her focus on the punch rather than some of their other encounters (most notably when she was tortured by Bellatrix in DH), but as I thought about it, I realized that the punch is probably much easier to talk about, and I can see why she'd focus on it instead.

Regardless, though, I really enjoyed your portrayal-through-Harry of Draco after the war in its own right, too. I tend to think that Draco did reform to some extent, but while you alluded to that, you also didn't skim over his very troubling background - it was a wonderful balancing act, and I'd excited to see Draco show up!

One tiny bit of CC. While I really enjoyed the content of the chapter and thought that you captured Harry, Hermione, and their relationship perfectly, there were a few points where I felt like the dialogue itself was a tiny bit stilted. For example, phrases like "mark my words" or "get off your high horse" didn't really sound like Harry or Hermione (respectively - though they could fit if the speaker was reversed), and there was sometimes a little too much formality in Harry's dialogue in particular.

I also feel like you overused adjectives/adverbs a little. For example,

She rolled her eyes at what he was doing to her notes but gave him a sincere smile as well.

"Sincere" just felt like overkill to me, especially since from the context, we can surmise that her smile was probably genuine.

Other than that, though, I really enjoyed this chapter, and I wish there was more to read! ♥

Branwen

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Review #8, by Beeezie Prologue

14th May 2015:
Hey, Carla! I'm here for BvB! :)

Wow. This is a really intriguing start, and I'm dying to know exactly what that law says! I love the way that you pulled Cassandra (I'm assuming Cassandra Trelawney?) into this and that you made her Muggleborn - it was a really cool way to tie in a little bit of what we know from canon and give it new depth and meaning. If this is Cassandra Trelawney, I particularly like the way you continued the portrayal in the books of Muggleborns being perfectly capable of being immensely talented and powerful witches and wizards, since we know that she was such a celebrated Seer.

(Ugh, I hope this is Cassandra Trelawney - otherwise, I'm going to feel like an idiot!)

I also really loved your portrayal of Hermione. I can absolutely see her fleeing noise and celebration (particularly noise and celebration that she isn't really a part of) for dusty archives and books, and the way she's using the time came off as absolutely genuine to me. Of course she's working on research to push for werewolf equality. Hermione was always someone who cared deeply about that stuff in the first place and wouldn't let it slip away, and it makes perfect sense to me that even though it's been about six years since the Battle of Hogwarts, all of the problems with blood status and prejudice haven't been solved yet - not on a societal level, and not on a legal level. (And I do want to mention that her caution before touching the parchment and your reason behind it? Perfect.)

This was so wonderful. I cannot wait to read more.

Branwen

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Review #9, by Unicorn_Charm Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

13th May 2015:
Hey Carla!

Again, I'm so sorry that I'm the absolute worst! :( I'm glad that you don't hate me, though! *hugs*

Arg! I can't believe that we STILL don't know what the law is! As one of my favorite quotes go, "You're killin' me, smalls!" I mean, it has to be something bad for Harry to even suggest working with Draco. Yet, it does seem like Harry's opinion of him has changed just a little bit. Hermione's obviously has not haha. I love how she brought up the fact that she hit him and Harry had to remind her that it was over a decade ago since she had. Speaking of those two, I loved how you wrote their friendship. It seemed very true to what we saw in canon. :)

Of course Hermione would have built up that reputation for herself. I mean, she wouldn't be Hermione if she hadn't.

Uh oh! Trouble with Hermione and Ron, I see? ;)

That last like about being a bigger mischief maker than George made me chuckle. :D

Bah! I'm dying from an over abundance of massive curiosity here, Carla! I ned to know what is going on! And I ned to see how Draco is going to react to Hermione, of all people, asking for his help. I hope that we see an update very soon because I honestly cannot wait to read on. I absolutely adore your writing, it never disappoints! ♥

I'm so sorry again for my memory loss. I must had been obliviated without realized it! ;)

Until next chapter!

xoxo Meg

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Review #10, by wolfgirl17 Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

12th May 2015:
NO!

I need more Carla! How can you keep the law from me this way? How an you deprive me of more chapters this way? Oh please please please tell me you have another update coming really soon. I should've known I'd get hooked on another of your stories and be on tenterhooks awaiting updates.

I liked the way you portrayed the interaction between Harry and Hermione here, and the foreshadowing of bad things to come for Ron and Hermione. I can't wait for Draco to join the mix and really spice things up.

As always, absolutely marvellous work. Please don't leave us salivating readers waiting too long for updates. I might die. Imagine it, dying and never knowing the end of your fabulous works. I can't bear the thought. I'm so excited by the idea of you updating Seven as well.

I do so love and good Snamione and your work is all so wonderful.

xx-Ellie

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Review #11, by TreacleTart Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

12th May 2015:
Hey Carla!

I'm here for our review swap!

I read the first chapters to this a little while back and was really excited to see where it would lead. I thought this picked up and continued nicely from where the last chapter left off.

I feel bad for Hermione. She puts so much stress on herself sometimes. I mean I know that it's important for her to figure out how to stop this law, but still, she needs to allow people to help her.

I was wondering how you were going to tie Draco in since he was on the cover of the story, but wasn't mentioned in the last chapter. I always enjoy stories where he and Hermione are forced to work together. I can already feel the potential love happening!

Harry really did a good job of manipulating Hermione. He's really improved his technique since his school days. I can't believe Hermione fell for his tricks!

Now for a bit of constructive criticism. I did notice a few awkward sentences and typos in this chapter. Maybe a quick edit of some of it would fix that.

If anyone could do this, it's you. – If anyone can do this

Hermione had gained a deserved reputation – well deserved reputation

It had brought her to the notice of her superiors and hence why she was being allowed to tackle something so serious on her own. – It had brought her to the attention of her superiors and was the reason she was being allowed to tackle something so serious on her own.

Also, those that are about, I doubt I could go up to and casually ask for help on this subject. – I doubt that I could walk up to one of the few who remain free and casually ask for help on the subject

Harry stood from his position on Hermione's desk – at Hermione’s desk

Overall, I thought this was another good chapter! I can't wait until Draco shows up and we get to see some Dramione goodness! Please, update soon!
~Kaitlin

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Review #12, by Felpata Lupin Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

12th May 2015:
Hi!
I'm back!

Oh, I loved this! Harry and Hermione's friendship is really wonderfully depicted! Harry's concerns for her and the way they tease each other really makes think of siblings. And it was so greatly amusing, too!

I can see why Hermione wouldn't be thrilled by Harry's suggestion, but I have quite a feeling she's going to change her views of Draco soon... The fact that she seems to be going through a bit of a crisis with Ron has me thinking that there might be a little romantic extent to this forced collaboration?

I don't mind at all the lack of action, although I am longing to discover a bit more about this law and its consequencies for Muggleborn people and Cassandra's plan etc...
So I really can't wait for your next chapter to be up! ;)

I'm so happy we swapped, because it made me discover this amazing story! Excellent job so far!

Hugs,
Chiara

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Review #13, by wolfgirl17 Prologue

12th May 2015:
Hiya Carla,

So I popped over to check this fic out. I'm so excited to read it that it's not even funny and thanks so much for linking it to me so I wouldn't miss out because what I've read so far is fantastic. I'm so thrilled to see a new, exciting story of the Dramione persuasion.

You know how I love Dramione! *swoons*

Now, this chapter was positively brilliant. I love the way you've kept us in the dark about what the Law actually is, and yet that you've showed us it will be something sinister because the pompous old purebloods are involved, but then a little less sinister with Cassandra's interference.

You did have a couple of errors throughout, little things like you wrote that Cassandra run, when I think you meant ran, but they don't interfere with the flow too much so whenever you get the chance maybe just do another once-over to amend them =)

You've got me on tenterhooks to find out what the law actually is. I have to read on so I can find it. Please tell me you've got it posted in the next chapter. I may die of curiosity if I don't find out what it is. I also can't wait to see your interactions between Draco and Hermione.

So excited it's not even funny. So hungry for more! Fantastic work, also, just to reiterate your awesomeness, I love your banner and your CIs they are so lovely that I wish I was as skilled as you an I may have to begin exclusively requesting work from you on TDA in future =)

xx-Ellie

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Review #14, by Flower n Prongs Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

11th May 2015:
Hi Carla! I'm stopping by for the BvB review battle.

The interactions between Harry and Hermione here were very well written. They were speaking like only comfortable old friends can, but both of them were trying to get their new work authority in to make their points. Harry stopping by to see what he could do and coming up with an out of the box suggestion while Hermione was going through old books and reading to find an answer was perfect. When faced with tough situations in the past, that was how they both dealt with things so I like that you kept them similar to the kids we saw ~6 years ago at the end of the war.

The mentioning of Harry being willing to work with Draco and accepting that he had changed somewhat was great. In the epilogue it is clear that he and Draco no longer hate each other, even if they aren't friends so I can see being work acquaintances at this time as perfectly reasonable. The fact that Ron didn't seem to let go of the past in canon (telling Rose to beat him in everything) will make for brilliant conflict here, I'm sure. I can't wait to see how it plays out with Draco in the next chapter.

Hermione calling Ron "Ronald" made me very curious about what was happening with them. The fact that you have made it nothing major, just the typical people-sometimes-clash and relationships changing over time is nice to read.

A couple of minor things now. When Hermione mentioned what happened to Molly's family I might mention the Prewetts in "the first war" rather than in "the war", simply because I think in her mind "the war" would be the second half of it. The other thing was that there needs to be a space in "sure you won't.Sorry." That's really the only two things that stood out to me.

I'm enjoying this so far and look forward to reading the rest. =)

- Rhaenyra

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Review #15, by Felpata Lupin Prologue

11th May 2015:
Hey!
Here for our swap! Please, please, please, forgive me for the lateness... I really couldn't get to this any sooner!

Ok, so... WOW!!! This is so intriguing! Such a great start!!!
I love when there is an ancient background story! It always makes things so misterious and fascinating...

I'm not quite sure what Cassandra did, but whatever it is, she seems like a brave and volitive woman... Also, it seems she has a few things in common with Hermione... Is she an ancestor of hers, maybe? Mmmh... I'm very curious...

That place really does seem like a heaven for Hermione! Well, I suppose I would love it, too! Being surrounded by books, especially ancient ones, always delights me!

I love the idea that she's fighting so hard for werewolves' rights! As a great fan of Remus like I am, the werewolves' cause is very dear to my heart!

So now she's found the enchanted parchment, whatever its content is... I expect something dark to come!

An absolutely wonderful start for what I'm sure will be an enthralling story!
Because I have to be forgiven for the lateness, and because this is so amazing, and just because I want to, I'll see you again soon on the next chapter (Not right now, though... time for bed...)!

With love,
Chiara

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Review #16, by alicia and anne Prologue

11th May 2015:
Hey!! I'm here for our review swap! :D

Oh no! I am not liking the sound of this new law that they're trying to make happen. It's going to be an evil law, I can tell!

I hope that Cassandra can get the Ministry to see sense, although if it's already been approved by the Minister I'm worried that it can't be stopped!

Oh she's going to change it! Those foolish men! Although they thought that noone would be able to stop them. I laugh in their faces! Especially with the way that she's changed it!

And Hermione doesn't have an answer for once? Say it isn't so!!

This was wonderful! I cannot wait to find out more about this law and how Hermione is going to stop it. It's going to be exciting! I can tell!! :D

I absolutely loved this!

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Review #17, by jessicalorewrites Chapter 1: In Which Harry Interferes

11th May 2015:
woooahh I only just noticed but 20 reviews on the first chapter?!? congrats! how does this currently have 0??? it's EVEN BETTER than the last one I'm enjoying this so much.

okay so I don't ship dramione even if I've always seen the potential and usually I avoid dramione stories because in my past experience they're not as well written as other ships. of course that's an over-generalisation but I've never found one I really really enjoyed... until this! honestly it feels like you've been possessed by jk rowling herself because the characters in this are so so inline with either things rowling set up herself or things I always IMAGINED. like harry is so fun and humorous in this chapter and I LOVE IT. he's usually a sad and dour auror but hell yes I am so here for harry who finds it hella amusing hermione has to work with draco hahaha.

speaking of, I think this was a really clever way of drawing draco into the story whilst also highlighting that there are still prejudices of sort, even if he has been cleared of all charges. people like harry are ready and willing to accept him but I thought it was really in-character for hermione to be hesitant and judge brashless.

I can't wait for the following chapters now! I cant WAIT to find out what you've done with draco's character post-war and how the relationship between him and hermione will develop.

(also yes whilst we're on this note, the interjection of couple problems between ron/hermione was a* too. realistic and not too in your face.)

much love! thanks for the swap and also thank you eternally for writing my current favourite dramione (even if draco hasn't been introduced yet hahah)

- jess, xo

p.s. WHAT IS THE LAW GOING TO BE ADFADJHBGKDFHG

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Review #18, by Veritaserum27 Prologue

9th May 2015:
Hi there Carla,

I'm here for the BvB!

A new story - what's this?! A mystery! I love mysteries!

Great job setting the scene with this one - I was hooked from the very beginning, but you managed to draw me in further and further throughout the story. I need to know what this law says! I need to know how Cassandra altered it!

Hermione seems to be referring to Harry as "her best friend in the Auror department," but I'm wondering a bit about Ron. I guess I'll have to read on to find out!

I found a few typos. First - here:

Her heart was pounding loudly in her chest as she run

I think you mean "ran." I also wasn't sure because in the next sentence you said that Cassandra was walking swiftly, but not so swiftly...

And there was one here:

and also those that had been propose but summarily rejected

should it be "proposed?"

Aside from those few, the story read well - and definitely had all the hallmarks of a fantastic start! I hope you continue to update this!

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Hiya, Beth!! :D

Here to finally reply.xD I can't believe this was a new story in April/May. It seems such a short time ago but it obviously isn't. Dear me. I am horrible at this. :)

I am glad I hooked you in! That was what I was really going for in my prologue so I'm glad that actually happened. :)

Thanks, also, for pointing out the typos.:D I've gone back and edited them when I first read your reviews! :)

And will definitely be continuing this although it will be slow going. hehehe

--Carla


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Review #19, by Gabriella Hunter Prologue

7th May 2015:
Hello!

I thought that I'd surprise you by leaving this review and here I am! I hope that this isn't coming too late but I'm glad that we're able to get this swap finished up! I really hope we'll see each other around the forums soon.

I really liked the way this was written, it was very smooth and easy to follow. The time jumps and the characters weren't difficult to understand and I think that you showed the nastiness of the pureblood elite very well. It's interesting to see the ancestors of your main characters in this prologue, I wonder if their behavior will seep into Hermione and Draco? I think that would be an interesting parallel. I am really interested and horrified by this law and I hope we discover more about it! I am REALLY keen on knowing how Hermione manages this! It's amazing to find a woman so brilliant speechless and I'm sure that the next few chapters of this story will be very well-done!

I would gush about this more but I've got to run, I hope you let me know when the next chapter is up!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hiya Gabbie! :)

I'm sorry that it took so long to reply to this swap. :) I am here now, though, and full of appreciation. :)

So, onto the review! :) I am glad that you really liked how this was written... :) I really tried my hardest (and, at times, it wasn't easy) to make it flow easily... And, mhmmm, I understand nastiness pretty well. I see too much of it, which is a sad truth but truth nonetheless. ;(

Anyway, I am going to be revealing the law as I move forward, of course (who knows when, really.xD It's gonna be a long story for the most part. haha) BUT, mhmm, thank you for the review! :) It's giving me the juice to keep writing this story. :)

--Carla


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Review #20, by Flower n Prongs Prologue

6th May 2015:
Hi. I'm here for the BvB battle. =)

I saw that this is the novella you were talking about in the Camp NaNo thread so I decided to give it a read.

The summary was enough to draw me in. I'm not sure what I was expecting but it was certainly not something starting in 1779. (I was going to ask why you had chosen that particular year, but I see that you have set the modern time 225 years later so that answers my question.)

Your writing for 1779 was great. The cockiness of the purebloods, bragging about what they had signed in public fits very well with what we see in canon. Of course they wouldn't worry about keeping their voices low around a female Muggleborn. Having her use magic that will (hopefully) lead to their undoing is a wonderful dose of karma. Additionally, you made sure that there were enough similar names and ideas that we could keep track of the older generation (a Malfoy, a Black saying "toujours pur", etc). A nice tie in to Harry's day.

Now that Hermione knows about the law, I'm interested to see what happens in the future. I will be adding this to my reading list. =)

- Rhaenyra

Author's Response: Hiya, Rhaenyra! :) First off, I am so sorry it took me and incredibly long time to respond... My life ate my time. It's a sad sad thing. :(

Anyway, yes, this is the novella I started for April CampNaNo. It's really been ages because now JulNo is almost over. I really am bad at WIP's. ahahahaha...

I am glad you feel my writing for 1779 is great. I tried as much as possible to imagine what life would have been like then with the ruling class and how the disenfranchised had even less power and voice than they know now. :) (And, yes! I intentionally did Toujurs Purs as a little shoutout to the Black family. I mean,I would imagine they would rather die than not be in something so monumental as the writing and passing of this law. hahaha)

I am interested to see what Hermione would do... I have things mostly planned but you know how characters in fics tend to be. hahaha. :)

So, again, thanks for the review darling! :)

--Carla


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Review #21, by BellaLestrange87 Prologue

6th May 2015:
This is for the Blue vs Bronze review battle!

This is a very intriguing first chapter! I love the idea of an ancient (well, sort of) law regarding blood purity. It seems just like something that especially rabid pure-blood supremacists would come up with to keep their lineage and families pure.

I love the little details you added in about the times, like how Septimus Malfoy was actually the one in control and not Unctuous Osbert. And this woman, whoever she is. I like how you can clearly tell she's from an earlier age, as she thinks that "even though" she's female she was a strong witch.

I really want to find out what exactly the law said. As Cassandra said, it must be truly horrific and not something that I would want anyone to go through. If it was nothing but 'marriage will be impossible' then she wouldn't have changed it.

Your descriptions are really good here. I could clearly visualize in my head the surroundings around Septimus and Cassandra while they were doing their business.

Hermione was characterized really well. It sounded so like her, grumbling at Harry but being secretly happy to be able to spend time among books. And I love how she's working at a pro-werewolf law in honour of Lupin. That's something I could see her doing. If only the law wasn't ten years too late for him to benefit from it.

You did a really good job setting the mood at the end of the chapter. Since Hermione for once doesn't have the answer it shows just how serious/vile this law is, and possibly how thorough. I can't wait to read the next chapter ;)

~Olivia

Author's Response: Hi, Olivia! Time to respond! First off, I am so sorry that this took so long! I am horrible when it comes to responding to reviews!

Anyway, I am glad that you were intrigued by the first chapter. That was something that I was really going for and I am glad that it came across. To figure out a time period, I actually had to look up and see any mentions of Malfoys in history and was just so glad I came across Septimus. He does sound evil, doesn't he?

I am glad you like my descriptions. They're some of my favorite parts to write (in contrast to dialogues, which are just evil) and I am glad that you can visualise the setting that I've, well, set.

I am also super happy that you think my Hermione is characterised well! I really really love her as a character and she is my favorite to write so I'm glad that she sounds true to the Hermione we know and love. :)

YAY!! (and it's a really really vile law. At least I think it is. haha)

So, yes, thank you for the review! :)

-- Carla


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Review #22, by chinaglaze Prologue

5th May 2015:
Hi there, here for the BvB battle;

I enjoyed this chapter. You created a wonderfully described and atmospheric picture of the Ministry in 1779.

The description of the seven wizards (will we learn who they were later on? I guess that one of them was a Black?) conniving to create this contract was great and the fact that we don’t know what is written on the document is intriguing.

I’d like to know who Cassandra is, will we find out?

This is a slightly odd sentence; ‘as the light showed her eyes, they revealed how tired she really looked.’ You are almost saying the same thing twice, but as no-one else is there to see, it seems a bit redundant. I think just ‘how tired she really was’ would work well enough.

I want to know why she has chosen what seems to be an arbitrary two hundred and twenty five years in the future for this law to be overcome in some way.

There is either a word missing or an extra word in here somewhere I think; ‘she would pray that she for what she had done, she would be forgiven.’

The beginning of the second part is very good; Hermione is doing what Hermione does, and there is an interesting hook pulling us into the next chapter.

Nice work.

Author's Response: First off, I am so sorry that I did not reply as soon as possible! But yay for BvB! :D

Anyway, I am really glad that you enjoyed this chapter.. I had a really fun time try to imagine what was happening in a world so long ago...

About Cassandra, I may mention her still but the majority of her role has been played out. :) What she does will be explained further though so it may be worth it waiting for that. :)

I'm glad you liked Hermione's bit! She really is my favorite character to write so I enjoy it when people like how I write her. :)

--Carla


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Review #23, by Crumple-Horned Snorkack Prologue

1st May 2015:
Greetings, Carla! I am the Crumple-Horned Snorkack, an elusive creature of the northern forest. Very few humans have ever sighted a Snorkack, because we are masters of camouflage. Today I'm sort of a light blue with a lighter blue, and maroon rectangles - I blend right in with the HPFF Archive, so that's where I'm hiding today and how I am here to review your story.

Speaking of colours though, your CI is gorgeous.

Wow, this is such an interesting plot so far. Whatever law they passed sounds bad. From the sounds of it, it's illegal for any of these families to marry with Muggle-borns? Or it could be something much darker - I wouldn't put it past them. I'm curious what exactly was in the law. I hope it didn't include anything about legalizing the hunting of Crumple-Horned Snorkacks.

Good for Cassandra, though - she saved the day! I'm glad she was able to think up that clever plan to modify the law right under their noses. Muahaha.

I love how you've written Hermione here - it felt just like I was reading her from the books. It's especially lovely that you've pointed out something that I think makes a lot of sense for her - that despite 13 years of living in the wizarding world, magic still surprises her sometimes, because it's not what she grew up with. I can so see that being the case. I grew up being unused to humans, and even nowadays when I see one, I tend to be very startled at first.

This is a great opening chapter! I can't wait to see how things all turn out. But for now, I promised I'd meet the Loch Ness Monster for tea. Cheerio!

Author's Response: It's Snorkie!! Hi, Snorkie! Always a pressure to see you around. :) I really like light blue.. That sounds fun, being able to change colors and have patterns all over your body. Humans are just boring, aren't we? hahahaha

First off, thanks! I am glad you like the CI! :)

And, yes, the law is quite bad... I will admit that while I already have the law written out now... I actually wrote majority of this story without knowing what that law was. Hahaha.

And I am glad that you like Hermione! I really, really enjoy writing her so I try as much as possible to give her an authentic voice. :)

But, yeah, thanks for the review darling and I hope you had a GREAT time having tea with Nessie. :)

--Carla


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Review #24, by CassiePotter Prologue

29th April 2015:
Hello! I'm here for our review swap!
I really liked this! You've set up your story really nicely, and I thought this opening chapter was a great hook. I'm really intrigued by this parchment, and what it says exactly, especially since it has Hermione Granger stumped!
I thought the beginning was really nice, and I really liked the pacing of it. Then when we switched to present day, the transition was in a good place, and felt really natural.
Overall this was a really good opening chapter. I have a lot of questions, but I think that's good at this point, since they're making me curious about what's to come! (Also I loved that you had a character called Cassie!)
Thank you for the review swap!
Cassie :)

Author's Response: Hiya, Cassie! Sorry it took me so long to get a reply back.. I am lazy/busy, it's a sad fact of my existence. :O

Anyway, first off, thanks for the swap! :D Your reviews are always great and I enjoy them.. (just so you know. :)) And hahahaha, I actually named her Cassie because Cassie (cassielassie on the forums) was very insistent.. lols. I am glad you think this was a great hook and that Hermione was presented well..
I am hoping that, in the next chapters, I am able to answer any of your questions and that you're curious. It's certainly what I was hoping when I wrote a prologue!

Cheers!
-- Carla


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Review #25, by Sarah Prologue

26th April 2015:
Very interesting first chapter. I'm already intrigued. Definitely want to see where this story goes, update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm glad you're intrigued! :D I will, hopefully, have a review up soon. :)

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