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Reading Reviews for For Eternity
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by alicia and anne The Victim

30th July 2015:
*sobs* I'm still so devastated about Louis being dead *dies inside*

I need to hug him and never let him go! :( I think that Narcissa and Louis will definitely help each other through this.

I wonder what killed him, and who? and more importantly, why? I hope that they can work it out soon and stop those responsible! :O Narcissa thinks that it's Scorpius? I don't know if he could ever do that, but who knows? :O I'm suspicious of him now!

Bellatrix is so mean! I can't believe that she killed the boy that Narcissa had a crush on. Well, I can because it's Bella, but still! :(

Awww Louis! Look at him holding her hand and having those feelings! He's so cute! I just want to pinch his cheeks and coo over him! He's so adorable!

NO! SCORPIUS NO! YOU CAN'T KNOW OR BE CONNECTED TO LOUIS' DEATH! :( Who are they going for next? :(

GAH!!! I need the next chapter! I need to know what's going on! I have so many feelings right now!

I love your writing so much, and I need to read everything that you've ever written! (It's on my list of things to review :P) and I just love you and I'm so full of love right now!

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Review #2, by The Basilisk The Becoming

5th May 2015:
Hello. It is I, The Basilisk, come here to grace you with a review. Hiss Hiss.

This was an enchanting tale. I love reading such stories about 'ghosts' - there is something morbid and captivating about them. I enjoyed your characterisation of a dead Louisss. You got his emotionsss and reactionsss down nicely. I also liked how you showed him trying to say goodbye and not being able to.

The interaction with other ghostsss is what appealed the most to me in this story. I couldn't guess who the firssst ghost was but after reading another review I realised it's Peter Pettigrew. Interesting, very interesting. I also liked how Fred and Narcissa were other ghosssts he met. I wonder if Fred will help him move on. I also wonder what is keeping Louis tied down and whether we'll meet more ghosts as the story progresses. I am also wondering whether these are indeed ghossts or they should be called something else.

So many questions, such suspense, I like it. Over all, what a lovely start to this story. You've built a good setting and your characterisation is good. The plot is intriguing and I'm curious to know more and read on. Keep writing.

Since this story was so good, I might come back when another chapter is up. Keep your eyes down and be glad I won't eat you - thanks to your brilliant writing. Keep it up.

Hiss Hiss,
The Basilisk

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Review #3, by alicia and anne The Becoming

26th April 2015:
Woo! I am finally here! Sorry it's an hour late. I had a nap like a loser haha.

I was instantly drawn in by that summary, I mainly felt pain go through me at seeing it :P But I had such a desperation to know what had happened and why?

I do like that he has a silver lining to his current predicament. "dead physically, but alive with spirit."

Oh no! Now I'm sad that he can't reach out to his family and have them know that he's there.

Someone can see him? Who is it!

Oh my god!! Fred! Fred is there! This has made me even sadder, but I'm so glad that Louis has seen him. So many conflicting emotions right now!

And he's met Narcissa, she said such kind and caring things to him, I really liked that.

I really can't think of who the first ghost is! :S Why can't I think of who it is?

This was amazing! So utterly heartbreakingly sad, but it was so incredibly written. You have such an amazing way with words, and you really tugged at my heart with this.

I'm so sad that he's dead! :(

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Review #4, by foreverwizards The Becoming

20th April 2015:
Hi there!

First of all let me say that your summary is brilliant. It drew me in right from the start, I love it.

Your characterisation is amazing - we've got that little bit of Ron the start, Fred is done extremely well, we know exactly what Dom's like, and Narcissa Malfoy at the end is just great.

The atmosphere throughout is very chilling, what with the mysterious death and all, but it's also a really emotional story and there's a lot of sadness behind everything. Which is kind of to be expected, since the main character is dead.

I read through the reviews, and let me just say - this isn't your comfort zone?! This is amazing!

Hm, seventeen-year-old, black eyes, slightly plump, killed himself...I have a suspicion but I really don't know who it is. Will we find that out?

I'm looking forward to the next chapter!

Author's Response: Hi, Addie!

Ah that summary took me ages to write, believe it or not :p I just wasn't sure what I wanted to say in the summary. Thanks!

It's one of my fears as a writer that I don't develop my characters well, but hearing that they've got a great foundation? It means a lot, so thank you!

Yes, this is VERY out of my comfort zone. I've never written anything like it. And thanks so so much!

I can't say for sure that you'll find out, he isn't really important. If you'd like to know, I answered another review confirming who it was :)

Thanks for the wonderful review! :D

-Leigh xxx

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Review #5, by Shadowkat The Becoming

20th April 2015:
Wow, this is really good and interesting! I'll definitely be watching for the next chapter.

Author's Response: Thanks so much!

-Leigh xxx

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Review #6, by Veritaserum27 The Becoming

20th April 2015:
Leigh - I LOVED IT!!!

This was so original and creative and well done! What a fantastic first chapter. I would have never, ever thought that you were out of your comfort zone. The story flowed so easily and it must be so difficult to write from the perspective of a ghost, but you handled it beautifully.

This had all of the marks of a fabulous beginning - you drew the reader in, laid out the cast of characters, each with their own personality, and set the stage for the next part of the story.

I WANT TO KNOW MORE!! How did Louis die? Why? Why was Harry at the burrow? What is keeping Louis from passing on?

And then there is the added layer of Narcissa - how does she fit into all of this? I really, really like the idea that Louis and Scorpius are best mates - I've never seen that before and it just makes sense to me now!

I think I've figured out that the first ghost Louis met (at the burrow) was Peter Pettigrew and I can see why he hasn't moved on, but I'm curious as to why he hangs out at the Burrow. I love that you've included Fred in this and it sounds like he'll be taking on a bigger role in the story, especially if he helps others to pass on.

I also like your hateful version of Narcissa. She definitely seems the type to haunt Malfoy manor. The only part I'm confused about is how Ron could tell the story of her haunting when she was alive during the only time Ron was at the manor - Unless you are telling the story AU, Narcissa didn't die during the second wizarding war.

I cannot WAIT to read more.

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Beth!

Thanks so so so much! *hugs* Your words mean so much. I've always loved beginnings, and hearing that you love mine?! It means so much!

All your questions will be answered! :D

I've honestly never pictured Louis and Scorpius friends either, but then I needed to add Narcissa in and it made sense to me to make them mates :p

Yes, it was Peter! And that will probably be one of the only times Peter is seen, maybe once more, so I'll just tell you that Peter being at the Burrow was him watching Harry. He feels guilty and in order to pass on, he needs to forgive himself and by doing so he needs to see that Harry has lived a happy life.

As for Fred, he just sort of popped up out of nowhere. I had no intentions of him being there and then all of a sudden there he was with the perfect role for the story. I'm happy you like him being there! I do too :p

Awe thanks so much! I haven't written much Narcissa so your words mean a lot. And I TOTALLY should have mentioned this in the story and I'll go back and add it in: Ron was talking about Narcissa haunting the manor because it's true he's been there before, but after the war he works with Blaise for a while in the Aurors office (before he helps George with WWW) and Blaise mentions how creepy it is there and he feels as if Narcissa (who I have die a couple years after the war) is still there. So Ron sort of ran with the idea of her haunting the place :p

Thanks so much for the fantastic review! It made my day!

-Leigh xxx

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Review #7, by merlins beard The Becoming

20th April 2015:
Hi Leigh!

I'm here for our swap.

I don't even know what to say. WOW. just WOW!

For something you claim to be out of your comfort zone, this is pretty amazing.

I started crying when Bill and his family find Louis' body and couldn't stop until the end.

There were so many strong emotions in this chapter and you made everything so believable. This is what great writing is all about.

I'm really impressed by that Chapter and I added the story to my Favourites.

I was wondering about one tiny thing. I don't know how it fits into the plot you're planning, but should Louis weasley probably be a little more confused at first? I wouldn't expect to be dead when I went to bed feeling a little unwell.
It doesn't really matter that much because the chapter feels very complete and flows nicely, I just thought I'd mention it.

Thanks for the swap, I really enjoyed this!


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Review #8, by tangledconstellations The Becoming

20th April 2015:
Hey there!

This was a really strong first chapter! You've set up the conflict really effectively straight away and I felt so sad for Louis :( At this point I feel really intrigued and invested in what's to come, which is definitely the mark of a good first chapter. The world you have established here has really captured my imagination.

*sigh* The part with Fred was really lovely, and absolutely made my heart hurt! It's really nice that these deceased characters are given voices again and I think that's a really important topic to explore in fanfiction. And I love Narcissa here. I've just written a one-shot with her actually, but it's so amazing how any one characterisation of her can be totally different. I'm excited to see what part she has to play later on, because it seems like Louis is really drawn in by her presence.

This was a really great start, and I'm looking forward to seeing what's going to happy to Louis. All the feels right now! For something that was out of your comfort zone, this was awesome and beautifully written.

Laura xxx

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