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Reading Reviews for You
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by jessicalorewrites you

23rd June 2015:
hey! jess here, reading and reviewing so that I can (finally lol) get the results out for the diversity challenge. the results should be out within the next couple of days so keep your eyes peeled over on the forums!

plot/written value:
WOW I did not expect this to be as emotional and heartbreaking as it turned out to be. oh my gosh, poor elphias. it must have been so difficult to harbour a love since adolescence and still be holding tight to that love well into your 100s. it's awful and so sad :( I liked the overall tone of this oneshot though: the melancholic vibe that you have going on, tinged with a bitter twist of heartbreak. it's wonderful, I think you wrote this beautifully.

characters:
albus isn't characterised so much but it makes me sad that elphias felt like he was holding albus back when they were at hogwarts. elphias was very well written, in my opinion, and I think you did his unrequited (as far as we know) love justice. the way he never felt bitter about it all, he just had a deep sense of longing but he understood that they could never be together, which in itself is heartbreaking because of COURSE they could've, should've, might've been together if albus had reciprocated. agjfgad I'm so torn up I wish they were lovers :(

diversity:
I liked the subtle hints at people talking about elphias and albus in the first paragraph. it wasn't outlandish but enough to make my stomach turn, hoping that nothing horrible came of it. and then this was reiterated in him having to put silencing charms around his bed so nobody would hear him say 'I love you', which was heartbreaking. I think you worked brilliantly reflecting the day of silence. this was a very emotional piece ♥

favourite line/bit:
idk why but "shining through proximity; how quaint."

- jess, xo

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Review #2, by ad astra you

12th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Review - Slytherin

EMILY. I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVEN'T READ THIS BEFORE? I AM A TERRIBLE PERSON

This is such a brilliant story and is a true testament to your writing ability - have I mentioned before how versatile your writing is? Because I'm in awe of it. You can go from candelabra-laced parody to something like this without skipping a beat and everything you write is a joy to read.

Anyway.

I've lowkey shipped Albus/Elphias since the get-go and your interpretation of them is exactly how I envisaged it - unrequited, Elphias living in Albus's shadow and wholly captivated by him, refusing to ever say anything - there's a melancholic note of regret that runs through this whole piece, things left unsaid, and how Elphias can only give voice to them after Albus has gone. Your description of their relationship is matter-of-fact and inevitable - of course Elphias would love Albus, of course he would never say anything. I dragged you down, I can see that now. this is such a telling line, but there's no trace of self-pity in it, just that matter-of-fact melancholy. Your tone throughout this piece is perfect.

This is a fantastic, moving piece of writing and it fits the prompt so well, touching on social attitudes and the role they played in Elphias's silence. Thank you for writing this!

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Review #3, by Crumple-Horned Snorkack you

16th April 2015:
Greetings, my friend. It is I, the Crumple-Horned Snorkack, here out of the northern wilds to leave a review for you.

This is such a beautiful story - and probably my new headcanon. It certainly explains a lot about why Elphias Doge spoke so highly of Dumbledore in his eulogy, as well as why Aunt Muriel didn't like him! You've created such a rich back story for a minor character, it's lovely.

The way you described the unrequited love is just so beautifully tragic, especially as it makes me wonder what could have happened if he were bold enough to tell Albus? It's just so sad that he preferred a lifetime of heartbreak and settling, over the risk of telling him and therefore potentially losing him forever, or being shunned by his classmates, as society was far less progressive and accepting in those times. It's just so sad. :'( But the strength of that unrequited love is what gives this story its emotional power. It's really quite lovely, despite how much it makes me wish he didn't feel like he had to remain silent. I could have warned him, if he'd asked me, that it sometimes gets lonely if you hide all the time... but of course, he would have had to find me in the woods first.

What a perfect ship and perspective to write this story for the Day of Silence, as well. It's so fitting. Hopefully there will come a day when no one feels ashamed of their sexuality.

This is a wonderful story and you should be so proud of it! But for now, I am back to silently hiding in the boreal forest and watching the humans try to find me.

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Review #4, by TearsIMustConceal you

12th April 2015:
Hi, here from the BvB review!

This was so beautiful, words do not describe how beautiful it really was, it made me want to cry a little bit.

I really feel for Elphias - I think it's heartbreaking that Elphias was so content in Albus' shadow, rather than coming into his own - his confidence is so low, it really did make me feel for him. And the fact he believes that he dragged Albus down - again, it's heartbreaking!

The whole unrequited love thing makes it truly relatable and believable - I guess we've all been there in some way or another, maybe not as deep as Elphias' love for Albus but we can all relate some way. I also think that it's heartbreaking because he never told him - he never received an answer - what if Albus had said he felt the same? I think that's what makes this story so beautifully tragic because Elphias - and us - will never know how Albus would have felt had he known.

Having Elphias struggle with his sexuality is hard to read because I think it's so wrong for people to hide who they are but it fits perfectly with the time period they lived in. I just want to give him a big hug and tell him it's okay!

Your writing is amazing! It's so beautiful and descriptive and real - the emotions it brought from me just show how incredible this story and your writing really is.

I truly loved this! :)

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Review #5, by Lila Stangard you

11th April 2015:
Hi Emily.

Lila Stangard here, reporting to you from the world beyond. I've recently been joined by someone else, and I think you might now who (if you watched my series. I'm that popular, you know!). But that person is getting a little bit annoying to be around, so I'm going to read one your stories instead.

I like love stories. My own love life didn't go as I had hoped. It's actually the reason why I'm dead. I think it could have something to do with the fact that he was married man, but you can't help who you fall in love with, right? Even if he was much older and you know... a teacher.

Anyway, I'm sad to see Elphias struggle with his sexuality. I wish everyone could be open, and no one would have something against that. But we're at least heading in the right direction now. When these two characters were young (as in as young as they are when everything in this story happens), it was probably a lot harder.

I wish I could hug him, but I guess I'm just going to have to wait till he joins me in the world beyond.

But I have to run off now. I think someone's calling for me.

See ya later around the forums, Emily! (with my real archive/forums name)

Love

Lila Standgard

Author's Response: Oh my, Lila, hello! Can I just say, I am a huge fan.

I think I do know who you're talking about! If you and I are both talking about the same slightly annoying but very endearing person, I was absolutely gutted at their death. I do indeed watch your series, and I'm flattered that you could take the time to review a story of mine! :D

Oh my, I can understand where you're coming from. Love lives are complicated beasts, aren't they? I do have to say I hope that mine never turn out even remotely like yours - no offence meant, of course. I guess you can't help you fall in love with, though, and that's a bit of a tragedy.

Wouldn't it be nice if everyone was open? But I do think that in the wizarding world, which seems to be slightly behind ours in terms of society, sexuality would still be a bit of an alien concept to them, especially during Elphias' time. I'm glad we're headed in the right direction now, though, as you said!

Well, he's an elderly man at the moment so I don't think that you'll need to be waiting long, and I'm sure he'd appreciate a hug from you!

Goodbye, Lila, and pass my best wishes onto the person I suspect we both know who's recently joined you.

Thank you so much for a lovely review! And if I ever figure out who you are, I will indeed be seeing you. Word of warning, though - I'm quite a terrible detective. :P

Thanks again! ♥

Emily


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Review #6, by Flower n Prongs you

10th April 2015:
Hi Emily!

This was a beautifully written story, especially considering the prompt it was written for. You have made Elphias Doge, a character that we barely get to see in canon, come alive and feel like a proper, fleshed-out person. The decision to have him have unrequited feelings for Albus was a very unique and intriguing premise. Everything you wrote helps to explain the long explanation and glowing eulogy Doge wrote for Dumbledore in Deathly Hallows.

I like the writing style that you used for this piece. The flowery, descriptive language was an excellent choice for a character born near the end of the Victorian period. (In reality, who knows, but this fits in my mind very well!)

I also like how you chose common names for the Victorian period (Edward, Robert) to make up their classmates. Tossing in a girl I assume would grow up to be Auntie Muriel was an unexpected, but nice twist.

I truly enjoyed this. =)

Author's Response: Hi Rhaenyra! (I'm getting so good at spelling that name, haha)

Oh my, thank you so much! I absolutely love writing minor characters and trying to give them more fleshed out personalities and I'm so glad that you think I managed to do that here with Elphias! Yes, I was thinking of the glowing eulogy that Elphias wrote for Dumbledore when I wrote this, because the level of adoration and admiration that Elphias held for Dumbledore seemed like it could also be chalked up to unrequited love, you know? So that's what I wrote, and I'm glad that you liked it!

Thank you so much! This was all written in one go, so I'm glad that you think it all suited the era well! You're right, in reality they probably spoke very differently but I'm glad that you liked this!

I'm glad that you liked the name choices! I did deliberately go for older names for their classmates, I'm glad you picked up on that touch and liked it! And yes, Muriel in this story does grow up to be Auntie Muriel - I decided to give a bit of backstory to the reason she seemed to dislike Elphias so much at Fleur's wedding, so to speak. :P

Thank you so much! And thanks for the amazing review! ♥

Emily


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Review #7, by Beeezie you

10th April 2015:
Hey, here for BvB!

This was really, really gut-wrenching to read in a lot of ways. On one hand, I can sort of see how Elphiasís feelings might have been an accurate understanding of the situation, because Albus really was so gifted and talented and respected... but at the same time, I was really struck by his low self-esteem. It seemed like he genuinely felt like he didnít give Albus as much as Albus gave him, because Albus was so much more gifted... but look at Hermione. I donít think Harry ever worried that he was just dragging her down.

(Of course, that could get into gender dynamics, too, but thatís completely off-topic.)

Thatís not to say, though, that I didnít find Elphias believable. It was heartbreaking to me because it was so believable, particularly in the era they were growing up in. Even if we suppose that the wizarding world doesnít mirror the Muggle one perfectly, I canít imagine that Elphias would have another to fear from someone finding out in the late 1800s/early 1900s. In a lot of ways, I feel like having the unrequited love you canít talk about builds this unattainable ideal Elphias seemed to have - secrets can take on a life of their own sometimes, especially when theyíre forbidden.

This was a great story. Amazing, amazing job.

Author's Response: Hey Branwen! :D

Oh my, thank you so much! I'm so glad that this had that effect, as horrible as that might sound. :P I don't really know where this came from - Elphias, I think, spent so long in Albus' shadow that it kind of became second nature for him to be the un-smart one in the background all the time as Albus won accolades and prizes and talked with respected scholars, and that would be pretty heavy on anyone's self-esteem, I think.

That's actually a really interesting idea I haven't thought about, about Harry and Hermione's relationship and the way gender dynamics factor into their attitudes towards one another. I do think that gender has an effect on the way Hermione was perceived, though, as a know-it-all and a nerd where Albus was a genius. This is quickly getting very off topic.

I'm so glad that you could find Elphias to be a realistic character - it is heartbreaking, that some people can be so downtrodden and so honestly believe that they're not good enough. :( Yes, I think another reason the prompt worked was because during this era, sexuality was still a beast that hadn't been explored at all, and I'm glad that you think that his keeping this secret to himself would make sense. I honestly couldn't have put it better myself - some secrets just grow so huge. :(

Thank you so much for an amazing review, Branwen! ♥

Emily


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Review #8, by Aphoride you

7th April 2015:
NO! I lost first review! :( So upsetting... next time, Emily, next time ;)

Anyway, you know Albus/Gellert is one of my absolute OTPs, but I've always loved the idea of Elphias Doge having an unrequited thing for Albus - after all, he seems pretty passionate about believing in Albus in the books, you know? :P Plus, unrequited love, to me, is more interesting than it being perfectly requited in some instances - like this one.

So yeah, I love the whole idea of this, and the way you've done it too. It's just so beautiful, the way you wrote it, with the idea that Elphias doesn't know if Albus ever knew, maybe ever even suspected, and he never said anything, because he believed - rightly or wrongly - almost that he wasn't good enough. It's a heartbreaking approach to take, but I love it because of that, you know? It's so real, and so raw because of that. You really make me feel for Elphias, because no one wants to almost deny themselves love because they're too scared and they don't think they're worth it, but at the same time it's bittersweet, because at least he was never potentially told 'no'... though it's not necessarily the best thing.

Your Elphias is so sweet, though - like, adorable-sweet, haha. He just seems so well-meaning and nice and nervous almost, and I can't help but feel so sorry for him that he never quite had the courage, and seems to have had a lot of internalised issues with his own sexuality (which is incredibly period-appropriate, and I love that you included it for that reason, but is so sad when you think about how it will have affected people then, you know?). Poor, poor guy.

(And I doubt dating Muriel will have helped. No wonder she didn't seem to like him too much in DH! God, she's a terror, haha)

Your writing in this is so lovely, too - it's so beautiful and so clear, and there's this gorgeous tone of honesty, too, which I love so much. This style of writing is something I'm really into at the moment, don't know why, so yeah, I love it :) You're so good at evoking emotion, too, which is so lovely, and the tone of this is so bittersweet and reminiscent and just lovely.

Gah, this is such a good one-shot! I loved it! :)

Aph xx

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Review #9, by Fuzzy Duck you

7th April 2015:
quack!

Elphias Doge had a major crush on Dumbledore. Even with my own two tiny eyes, I can see that.

Oh--may I introduce myself? I'm a fuzzy little duckling who just hatched a few days ago, and now I'm learning how to read! Stranger things have happened, I'm sure.

Elphias is a character that I don't know much about, but I like that you chose to write about him. This showed a glimpse of his mind that his eulogy for Albus would never show. Poor guy, kissing Ron's Auntie Muriel to hide his affection for Albus. I hate that for him so much.

This line made me flap my wings with glee: "Perhaps I entertained the foolish notion that proximity to a shining thing would cause my own dull polish to give off a small sparkle of its own. Shining through proximity; how quaint."

Wow, that is just amazing writing! Prose like this fills my little duckling heart with joy.

Well, I must waddle on down the lane now. Keep writing, and be kind to your web-footed friends!

♥Fuzzy Duck

Author's Response: Oh my, hello! ♥ You are the cutest thing.

Yes, I do believe that he did; it's very quickly becoming something of a headcanon. :D

Elphias isn't a character mentioned in canon a lot, I think, so I really enjoyed giving him and his adoration/admiration for Dumbledore a bit of backstory. Yes indeed, I wouldn't wish kissing Muriel on anybody! Poor Elphias.

Oh, thank you! You're making me blush, but I'm terribly glad that I could fill your little duckling heart with joy. ♥

See you around, hopefully! I will make sure to do both! Thank you for the amazing review, Fuzzies. :)

Emily


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