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Reading Reviews for The Sorting of Albus Severus
  
13 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Katie Wallenby Chapter 2

31st May 2015:
What a delightful second chapter. Despite all the positives with your writing, I definitely felt for Albus at the end and hoped he'd come around in this next installment and he did.

I thought the connections you used for Dominique to illustrate her point were great ones - particularly Tonks and Cedric - and her justifications were spot on. I'll confess I think she got a little preachy at a certain point, but it was nevertheless what Albus needed to here to stop feeling pitiful and sorry for himself.

I also thought your story ended up making a great statement about Hufflepuff as a house. It really is quite the afterthought for most people and it doesn't seem right that it's that way. I had a few negative run-ins with some Hufflepuffs actually, but by and large the descriptions you used were completely right. And things wouldn't have lasted long enough for Albus's dad to even be born if Hufflepuffs hadn't been helping out in the halls from what I've come to understand from some of my old school friends.

Thanks for sharing this splendid story!

Author's Response: Hello again. =)

Dominique was definitely a little preachy. But this was written for a children's story challenge, so I wanted to get a moral in here somewhere. (Very different than all my usual, grey characters and difficulties in my work.) I feel like Hufflepuff doesn't really get the credit it needs to get, which is something coming from a Ravenclaw.

Thanks for yet another review. You really went above and beyond this month and it means a lot.


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Review #2, by Katie Wallenby Chapter 1

31st May 2015:
Hello! I couldn't resist a story about a younger character going to Hogwarts because I never ended up having any kids of my own, so I won't get to share that with them.

My favorite part then, of course, was the moment that Albus took in each experience for the first time. I remember the comparison all too well between the rumors and descriptions you hear and the reality. As awe-inspiring and nerve-wracking as it can be for a muggleborn, I liked how you made clear it's not so far a stretch for those of us from magical families either. Without seeing things with your own eyes, words can't really do Hogwarts justice.

I also enjoyed how you set out clever markers that Albus was destined for Hufflepuff and also NOT for Gryffindor. While not universally true (see Neville Longbottom), I thought his body language and the depth of his concern spoke to a personality that didn't really fit with the lions. At the same time, you made clear with his countdown and his packing and preparations that he was very diligent and hard-working - classic Hufflepuff traits.

I'm interested to see how the next chapter treats the aftermath of his big moment!

Author's Response: Hi Katie!

I'm glad you picked up on the hints that Albus was not going to be a Gryffindor. And it is good to hear from somebody with a wizarding background that Hogwarts is every bit as magical when seeing it the first time as it is to Muggleborns.

Thanks again. =)


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Review #3, by bittersweetflames Chapter 2

9th May 2015:
I'm BACK!!! You cannot believe how EXCITED I was when I saw that you were the last post in BvB because I wanted to read chapter 2 of this and now I have an excuse to ignore other responsibilities and READ. And LEAVE YOU A REVIEW TOO, of course! :D

Ok, moving on. First off, DOMINIQUE. Dominique is just too cool. People tend not to use her too often, which I think is just a shame because she strikes me as a brilliant character. :)

The fact that you sorted her into Ravenclaw is also a brilliant choice in my estimation (AND WHAT? NO I'M NOT BIASED ABOUT THE FACT THAT IT'S RAVENCLAW. WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?!) Ok, ah, yes... The fact that she would go out of her way to try and see how Albus is doing makes me feel like she is such an inherently good person. And she's RIGHT, more than anyone else, she would know best how Albus is feeling.

When we reached the part where Albus says that Ravenclaw is a good house and implies that Hufflepuff isn't surprised me as well! And then Dom does the most beautiful thing by showing Al in a way that he'd understand that Hufflepuff is a most worthy house.

You talked about Tonks and that made me sniff a little; then you add in Cedric and I remember how absolutely brilliant of Jo it was to make him the Champion! Hufflepuff definitely deserved that moment of glory, they're such a nice house.

Ah...Then, lastly , of course, when the cousins talk about how Harry would feel about Albus' sorting I think Dom's insight was just smart. And she's right, of course. Harry is just the sort of person, who would not be prejudiced regarding houses because he valued everyone for who they were and not for where they came from (Snape, anyone?)

Okies then, LOVELY story. I really enjoyed this. Albus in Hufflepuff really made a lot of sense and you wrote it so well! :)

--Carla

Author's Response: Hi Carla! Thanks for finishing up the story.

I am also all about sorting people into Ravenclaw, so I'm glad you liked Dom's placement there. I actually have no clue what people usually do with her, but I thought she would be a cool person to work with.

How could he not love Hufflepuff and think they were cool after hearing about Tonks and Cedric? (And I'm glad you thought it was Ravenclaw-esque for Dominique to realize how to get through to Albus.)

Thanks so much! =)


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Review #4, by Oregonian Chapter 2

8th May 2015:
Hi! This is Vicki/Oregonian of Slytherin House. I just had to read this story because what we all want to know, of course, is which House Al was Sorted into.

I was struck by your writing this entire story with essentially only two characters. True, there are other bodies lurking in the background like silent shadows, but our focus is directed entirely on Albus and Dominique. This makes the message of the story really stand out. In fact, thereís virtually no dialogue at all in Chapter 1, except for the brief conversation with the Sorting Hat, and yet Chapter 1 is full of life anyway.

I love the way you show Alís assumed confidence as the story opens. He is a member of a large and loving family, Gryffindors all (or so he thinks). He knows about Hogwarts and its customs and what goes on there. He feels about as comfortable as he can be, for a new First Year. He knows he can influence the Sorting Hat somewhat by making a special request. And then, in the blink of an eye, he gets blindsided by being Sorted into Hufflepuff, and his vision of his assured future comes crashing down.

It makes me wonder whether there are other first Years who are so disappointed by their final disposition. Are there tears blurring the eyes of some other new First Years also?

Your Dominique is so wise, like a Ravenclaw, but also so compassionate, like a Hufflepuff, to see instantly what this might mean for Al and to seek him out the very next morning to try to prevent a long-term disappointment. It was clever of you to write her like that, trying to turn Alís perceptions around before they had a chance to become entrenched in his mind.

Your writing style is plain and straightforward, very easy to read, and free of excessive description or lush verbiage that might distract us from the sharp focus of the story. It is just a little moment, but an important one that can affect Alís life for good or ill. I enjoyed reading this story.

Author's Response: Hello Vicki! Thank you for taking the time to read and review the whole story. =)

Writing with two characters was something very different to me. Both in fan fiction and original fiction I tend to have pretty big casts, but that didn't seem to fit for this story. I felt like it would be clearest for the message and to show Albus's growth with a smaller cast, especially since it is for a Children's Story challenge.

Your question is a great one. Surely there are other kids who are disappointed in where they end up, even though we don't see them. Now my mind is running through other characters to try to figure out who else might have been disappointed.

I'm glad you enjoyed this. Thanks again! =)


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Review #5, by bittersweetflames Chapter 1

7th May 2015:
Hiya, sweetie. :) Here for the BvB.
Anyway, I simply HAD to read and review this story.. I am the BIGGEST Albus II fan and anything regarding him I just HAVE to read. :)
-breathes deeply -
Ok, I always thought about an Albus sorting. :) I had actually wrote, in my head, a story of his sorting for every single house. Like, what his reaction would be, what James would say (because you KNOW that James always has something to say) but your take on his Hufflepuff sorting is just perfect.

I think that Gryffindor is certainly the 'common' choice for sorting any of Harry and Ginny's kids but I don't think that a LOT of them would be. I actually think that the entire Next-gen should be spread out a lot over the houses. (but that's just me,haha)

Al's feeling of dejection over the fact that he got into Hufflepuff is so palpable I almost feel sorry for him. His lack of response to his new housemates,the one-word answers are all moody and would certainly not endear him to the badgers (although, they're a stunningly nice house. I'm sure they understand.)

I cannot wait to see what will happen next and how Al will warm up to his house. Knowing the Al I do know in my head, I think Hufflepuff is a perfect choice for him (although I say this about all the houses. I just really love Al so much)

Ok, thanks for sharing the story, hun. :) Lovely work.

--Carla

Author's Response: Hi Carla!

I'm glad to get the opinion of a super Albus fan on this. It was my first attempt at Next Gen but when I got the idea for the Children's Challenge about somebody having a hard time with their sorting I couldn't resist using Albus for it. With the conversation he and Harry had in the epilogue, he seemed like the natural selection for this.

I'm glad you aren't opposed to the idea of the Next Gen kids being spread out a little, since we see one of his cousins is a non-Gryffindor in the next chapter as well. ;)

Thanks so much for taking the time to review! =)


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Review #6, by oldershouldknowbetter Chapter 1

5th May 2015:
Hi there, here for a bit of BvB action

... only because you were so quick and got ahead of me, after someone else had already gotten ahead of me. *sigh* Guess, I'll just have to read another of your excellent stories.

I'll try this one, for two reasons. Firstly I love the next generation, a lot, and even though you say you have not tried it before this story, I will be interested in your take upon it. Secondly, that I did something interesting with the sorting of Albus in my own Next-Gen story, and I am interested to see someone else's 'interesting' take upon his sorting.

I do like his excitement at what awaits him in his future. It had never really occured to me that his journey upon the Hogwarts express would have been the second time he'd seen it - that he'd probably accompanied James on his first trip. I can just imagine James rubbing it in, telling his younger siblings that 'he'd tell them all about it later,' then making up the most outlandish stuff.

I can also see James teasing his brother about not being magical enough to be accepted - it is the natural precursor to him teasing his brother about being sorted into Slytherin. A little bit of a CC, though if I may, I think you'll find that the last sentence of the fourth paragraph has a subject, but no predicate.

It was a good choice to skip over the train trip. It meant so much to Harry and decided the course of his friendships and probably sorting too. If you had gone into it for Albus, the events could have changed his sorting - it was well considered to ignore it.

I like how his nerves blind him to the 'wonders' of the magical boats and the trip across the lake with Hogwarts coming into view - it then makes the wonder he feels all the more greater when he finally sees the Great Hall. It lives up to all and more that his brother and cousins have told him.

I like his prosaic dismissal of the glories done by former members of each house. It shows that he has more things to worry about on his mind than dim figures of the distant past. It also shows that his nervousness about his sorting might be coming back, only having been dismissed temporarily at the wondrous sight of the Great Hall.

It is interesting that you made no mention of the sorting or even presence of Malfoy, Scorpius. I know this is only a two parter, but it does say a lot of things about the story you want to tell.

Then along comes his sorting, he asks for 'not Slytherin', but I'm not sure that he gets exactly what he wants - maybe he should have been more specific. Though there may be purpose we cannot see in the hat's sorting - there is more of this story yet to come and perhaps all will be revealed therin.

He is not terribly happy at his sorting and we can feel his dejection as he glumly walks to his table and eats his dinner. His desultory responses will not endear him to his housemates, but hopefully they will cut him some slack seeing that it is his first day and all. He is naturally nervous about the reaction of his relatives, but hopefully there he will also be surprised by their reactions too.

I think he has gotten the spirit of Hufflepuff wrong with his summation that the house is only for those who don't fit anywhere else. He will have to see, but I think he will grow up a lot in the next seven years and find out exactly why he was sorted where he was.

I am so interested to see what you do in the next chapter:
- will it be a direct continuation and hence, let us see what potential exist for the character of Albus to grow into, or
- will it be Albus at the end of his schooling looking back on how the hat was correct in his placement?

There are so many ways to go on from here, I just have to go and read the next chapter. I certainly know what I will be reviewing if I 'draw' your name again in the BvB.

Andrew,
Oldershouldknowbetter.

Author's Response: Hi Andrew. Sorry it has taken me a few days to get around to replying to this, but real life got in the way.

Thank you for providing so many details about what you liked and what you think can be improved in the story. Your perception of Albus and James's relationship seems very similar to what mine was, with James as the stereotypical teasing older sibling while Albus was quieter and more self-conscious.

I'm glad that you are interested enough in this to want to read the second chapter to see what happens! (Although, I must say, both of your ideas for the next chapter have stood out to me. Now I am tossing around the idea for writing one of those in the future. Just when I thought I was done! haha)

Thanks again so much for reviewing. =)


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Review #7, by Unicorn_Charm Chapter 1

20th April 2015:
Hi there! I'm here for our swap! :)

I'm super glad that you responded to my swap, because I'm thrilled I got a chance to read this. This chapter was probably one of my favorite things that I've read on this site, ever. So please excuse the excessively gushing review that is about to happen. :)

I. Love. This. Loved it! The way you wrote Albus in the beginning, so excited to attend Hogwarts was just adorable. How he knew every little detail, down to the Giant Squid and how it seemed so long to him, from the time he learned all about it until he saw the Hogwarts express for the first time. And then his little countdown on his calendar. Oh it was just so cute!!

The voice you gave him and the way you wrote this reminded me of JKR, to be completely honest with you. It was so, so impressive. :D

I could feel his excitement and his nervousness when Sept 1st finally arrived. With him already being packed and scarfing down his breakfast. His worry about which house he would be in. His happiness at knowing that he was magical enough to go. It was all portrayed really well. :)

I just adored his amazement at the Great Hall when he saw it for the first time. I imagine that it would be a breathtaking sight, the first time you see it and even with him thinking he knew everything, it still amazed him. The cutest thing was how impatient he was while waiting to be sorted. ♥

Aww I felt so bad for him after he was sorted! Not because he was sorted into Hufflepuff - which is a great house - but because he felt so left out from the rest of his family. :( Hopefully he'll grow to see that being a Puff is nothing to be ashamed of.

Gah! I just loved this so, so much! I am absolutely reading the next chapter! Such a wonderful job on this, I can't say that enough. Loved it!! Thanks for doing the swap with me!! ♥

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hi Meg! *waves*

This was such a sweet review that made me grin like an idiot. This was my first attempt at writing Next Gen so the fact that you thought it was really well written made me very happy. I wanted to show how Albus would be so immersed in Hogwarts given his family (in sharp contrast to his Dad) but tried to balance that with the nerves we saw in the epilogue.

The comment about JKR was amazing and made my day. =)

I'm glad you want to read the next chapter of this. And don't worry about Albus, I'm sure he'll be fine. ;) haha


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Review #8, by CassiePotter Chapter 1

18th April 2015:
Hello! I'm here for our review swap!
I think reading stories about Albus being sorted are always really interesting, so I decided to check this out! I think you did a really nice job capturing his excitement as his first year of Hogwarts gets closer, and I liked that you started way before September. It gave us a little more time to see Albus's excitement grow until he gets his letter. The transition from excited to nervous was also really well done.
I loved your descriptions of the boats and the Great Hall! I never really thought about how uncomfortable those boats could be until now. I don't imagine it would be a very relaxing first trip to Hogwarts in those tiny boats! I thought you captured the magic of seeing the Great Hall for the first time really well. I loved that it was more than Albus could ever imagine it to be before he saw it.
I never expected him to go into Hufflepuff! Being a Hufflepuff myself, I was really excited. Haha. But I've never read a story where Albus was put in Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw (I put him in Slytherin), so this was a really nice change from what I see a lot.
This was a really great opening chapter! Thanks for the swap!
Cassie :)

Author's Response: Hi Cassie! Thanks for taking the time to review this story. I'm glad that you liked the description and Albus's discomfort with those little boats. (Which I can only imagine would be even more uncomfortable for poor Hagrid!) Having Albus be a Hufflepuff never seems to be considered an option, so I decided to explore that a bit. I am not a Hufflepuff, but as you will see in the next chapter I have a great respect for the house! =)

Thanks again!


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Review #9, by Freda_and_Georgina Chapter 2

17th April 2015:
Woot! Three cheers for Hufflepuff! (our house, naturally!)

Love how a Ravenclaw cousin is the one that talks such sense into him; it's so fitting and nice that she compliments the house so much. She does a really good job encouraging Albus!

I also like how this chapter has more dialogue. The previous chapter didn't have much of any dialogue at all that I recall. It still works without (he really didn't want to talk to anybody!), but I think dialogue helps move the story along.

PS- "Cedric was chosen, not a Hufflepuff or a Ravenclaw or a Slytherin" I think you meant Gryffindor there.

--Freda

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed it. I had never tried to write Next Gen before and the amount of stories & ideas out there of what people are like is a bit overwhelming so your comments made me happy. I'm a Ravenclaw myself who has become friendly with many Hufflepuffs, so having a Ravenclaw cousin be the one to talk to him seemed fitting. =)

I did mean Gryffindor, not Hufflepuff in that sentence! Thanks for pointing it out. *runs off to edit*


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Review #10, by Little Magic PUFF Chapter 1

10th April 2015:
Hi there!

I'm Little Magic Puff, and I saw you around the forums. I figured I'd stop by and check out your story, since I haven't actually read anything of yours before.

I like this story. I can see why Albus would be scared. He's probably heard a lot of nasty things about Slytherins before he came to school. But people shouldn't talk nasty about each other. It's not nice, and I don't use my Puff magic on people that are not nice!

But then he gets sorted in to Hufflepuff, which I must say sounds like a lovely and warm house, and it ends up being even more disappointing (I don't see why he'd think that, but I'm sure my Puff Magic can make it better *hugging him tightly, until he admits that he's where he belong*

Anyway, I'm sorry to say that I have to go back to my land - to the fields of Rainbow-y, where I live with my sisters and brothers in pufftastic harmony. Hopefully you can visit us some day. You'll love it there. Everything is pink and fluffy, and you can't help but be in a good mood. It's a peaceful place. And rumor has it there's a hidden treasure there too, but you didn't hear that from me *vanishes in thin air, but leaves a final message written in the sky*

Hug
Little Magic PUFF

Author's Response: Hello Little Magic Puff!

I am glad you like that he got into Hufflepuff. I think that Hufflepuffs don't deserve their reputation, because loyalty and fighting for justice is an invaluable thing in times of crisis. I'm sure he will accept it, especially if there are people giving him hugs and support like you! =)

Have fun in the fields of Rainbow-y and thank you for the lovely review!


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Review #11, by Fuzzy Duck Chapter 1

9th April 2015:
quack!

I'm a little baby duck, and I know how Albus feels. When I was about to hatch four days ago, I was nervous because I didn't know what the world would be like, or what dangers I might face. But here I am, all hatched and already reading fanfiction! There are worse fates. :)

You characterized Albus very well, with all of his nerves and uncertainties. I think that everyone can relate to being nervous sometimes, and with James as a constant jokester teasing him, Albus had a lot to worry about. His Sorting into Hufflepuff came as a surprise, but I hope that he will soon find his place within the House. Hufflepuff is much more than "the house that was made to take people who didn't fit in anywhere else," but that is a very common perception of the House. There are many great things about Hufflepuff; Albus only needs to realize that.

You know, I think that if they were to allow ducks into Hogwarts, I would be in Ravenclaw. That's the House of the birds, so I would fit right in. :D

Lovely story, and I hope that if you ever continue, Albus realizes that the Hufflepuffs are birds of a feather that he can flock with together.

Be kind to your web-footed friends!

♥Fuzzy Duck

Author's Response: Hello Fuzzy Duck!

I'm glad that you like how I characterized Albus. This was my first delve into Next Gen. I agree: there are many great things about Hufflepuff and I'm sure Albus will see them. =)

I would be very glad to see you in my house Fuzzy Duck. Thank you for stopping by!


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Review #12, by SnowyOwl19 Chapter 1

24th March 2015:
Hi there! I think this fic is great. I like how we're taken on a mini-roller coaster ride with Albus as he feels happiness, excitement, and fear during his first trip to school. It's how I remember feeling around his age when I moved to a new school!

Best of all, I like the twist of Albus being a Hufflepuff. After all, loyalty was a key theme of Harry and Dumbledore's relationship, and that's one of the traits of a good Hufflepuff. Albus is an interesting character (even JKR says so!), and putting him in an unexpected situation makes his character more fascinating.

Cheers!
-SnowyOwl19

Author's Response: Thanks SnowyOwl! I'm glad you like it so far. It is different than my usual style (era, rating...) so your review made me smile. I totally agree with you about loyalty: Hufflepuffs have been underrated since loyalty and being true is so important in the Harry Potter books. Thanks again! =)

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Review #13, by Tiny Teddy Bear Chapter 1

18th March 2015:
So cute! I really enjoyed this.

'Albus tore into it, leaving scraps of parchment on the floor, and read it over three times before he looked up. He finally had his proof that he would be going to Hogwarts and that he was not, as James had insisted, not magical enough to get in.'

LOL, of course James would tease Albus like that - I can just hear him!

And then - HUFFLEPUFF! Poor little Albus, so dejected about it!

I'm really looking forward to seeing where you take this. I'm sure Albus will find his spot eventually. :)

Author's Response: Thanks! This is my first attempt at Next Gen so I'm glad to hear you enjoyed it. It may be a tad cliche, but I can't imagine a boy who was named after two huge pranksters not teasing his little brother (plus, does any big brother not tease?). Thanks for the lovely review! =)

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