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Reading Reviews for Not Backing Down
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by EnigmaticEyes16 There Are Two Houses in the Dungeons

2nd September 2015:
Hi! I am here again with another late Hot Seat review!

This is getting more interesting! I like how you've included some of the kids from the first in this chapter, like Holly and Josh. I wonder who that boy at the end was though? Was it Josh? Was it someone she was related to? I'm very curious. And what exactly happened when she burst? Will we find out?

I think your Lucy is a very interesting and entertaining character though. I like that she's not like the other Puffs, and she does try to study harder than the rest of her house. Why do the students dislike her though? Is there a particular victim? Or is she just an easy person to dislike? Or an easy person to bully? I don't know yet. I love how she creates a sandwich instead of birds though! That was really funny and I wonder what went wrong to cause it.

All in all I really enjoyed this chapter and I can't wait to see what happens next and maybe meet some more of the characters introduced in the first chapter!

xxNix

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Review #2, by EnigmaticEyes16 Prologue: The Den of Wolves

30th August 2015:
Hi! I'm so late for your Hot Seat reviews, but I've finally made it!

First of all, I wanted to say that this was such an interesting beginning to a story. I've never seen a story begun by this, by sorting all the--I'm assuming--main characters and their opinions on their sortings. I also like how none of them seem to approve of the hat's decision and I'm curious to see what happens as they go on their journey to finding out the reasons behind the hat's decisions for each of them.

This chapter seemed so long when nothing technically happened story-wise, but at the same time we got a nice little peak into each of these eight characters personalities and I can't wait to see how you continue their stories in the next chapter, especially since dealing with so many people can be quite tricky.

Anyway, this is a great first chapter and I can't wait to see where this story will lead in the future chapters!

xxNix

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Review #3, by ScorpiusRose17 There Are Two Houses in the Dungeons

20th August 2015:
Hi again! (Slytherin Hot Seat Author)

Here with another review for you!! :)

This was an interesting chapter on Lucy. I liked how you really made her front and center and give the readers a chance to get to know her and see what she is like.

I liked getting a peak into her day and seeing how she copes with school, other kids and if she is good at magic or not. I don't normally read anything about Lucy, but I thought the way that you characterized her was spot on especially by making a point on how she feels unnoticed in the large family she has.

I am really looking forward to seeing what comes next in this story and I hope you have the chance to post again soon!

Adding this to my favorites!

Keep up the great work!

-Jenn

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Review #4, by ScorpiusRose17 Prologue: The Den of Wolves

20th August 2015:
Hi there again Slytherin Hot Seat Author!

I am here with another review for you! :)

I thought this was a great way to open a story. I liked getting the details of each character and seeing where they get sorted. I think the biggest surprise to me would have to be James and getting sorted into Slytherin. I think it is an interesting choice and one that I look forward to reading more because you bypassed the norm.

I also really like how you delve into the minds of each of your characters and give us their thoughts and feelings of what they think or feel where they should belong and how they feel about where they have been placed. The insight is great!

I look forward to reading and reviewing the next chapter and finding out how they are all going to fit in these houses... or not.

Keep up the great work!

-Jenn

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Review #5, by SunshineDaisies Prologue: The Den of Wolves

26th March 2015:
Hello hello!

So first off, as a Hufflepuff I just want to tell you that I am 100% not insulted. It's fairly obvious you're stereotyping all of the houses, and it seems that they'll all learn to love their houses in the end. At least, hopefully they will.

This was an absolute delight to read! Sorting and houses and applying the houses to characters personalities is so interesting to me. I'm really excited to read a fic about it! This looks like a really promising prologue.

I love the way you've set this up. I love the structure of this in so many ways I'm not really even sure where to begin.

Okay, so I like how you wrote the piece symmetrically, so that you started and ended with the same house. It makes the whole thing feel very symmetrical, to the point where I thought there was more symmetry than there actually was! That's a good thing, of course, as symmetry is naturally very pleasing.

I also like how you mostly paired up canon characters with ocs in the houses, and when you put two ocs together, they're in the house we're most familiar with. It is a great way to introduce the ocs in a way that readers will respond to. Good work!

I think the characters are wonderful so far! I think you've done an especially good job with Lee. Her personality is just radiating from the text here. I have a pretty clear image of who she is as a person, and I love her already.

The other characters were less memorable, but we spent so little time with them that makes perfect sense. I would have liked to see a bit more personality from each one, but they're young and nervous, so it also makes sense that they'd be a little shy. And maybe Lee just has the strongest personality of the bunch. :)

Anyway, I think the characters are all very distinctive, likeable and interesting. I'm very excited to learn more about them!

And I'm sure you can tell, but this definitely keeps me interested.

Overall, this is a very, very good start! I'm excited to read more!

Author's Response: Sorry about the delay on responding! Your review just left me without words.

I'm glad you liked the structure! I planned it that way on purpose- everyone was in the order they were in for a reason ;)

Thanks for the OC remark! Although I did change one OC to a canon character, I hope you still feel like they're good, considering that there's now one OC and one canon character in each house.

I do feel like Lee stands out, doesn't she? Although in the next chapter, they're older, and their personalities /have/ changed over the years. Hopefully they each become memorable in their own right!

Thank you so much for reviewing!


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Review #6, by wolfgirl17 Prologue: The Den of Wolves

25th March 2015:
Hey there Rach!

Wolfgirl here with your requested review. Finally. Sorry it took me so long. I have no excuse other than that I'm a lazy sod.

Now, so far you do have an interesting first chapter here. People will definitely want to read it. Don't be discouraged if you've not been getting a lot of feedback on it just yet. Most people using the site lately are about Diversity and Slash fics and all kinds of other stuff.

There aren't so many of us around anymore who appreciate just a good old fashion Next Gen fic in which the characters are all as they are in canon and what not. I'm having the same issue with my new next gen fics. I KNOW they're good cos I've got them published on ff dot net and have over 2k reviews about the fic. But here it's not been getting much traffic at all and even less reviews. Don't sweat it, people here think they've read everything for a pairing that they could possibly read and so skim over them unless they're whatever they happen to be looking for. It's unfortunate, but sadly it's how things are at the minute.

Sometimes the folks on this site are just a little harder to please, methinks.

Anyways, your story is good. It's interesting and different from some of the cliched next-gens we see about, so kudos for doing such a good job of breaking away from those. Putting James in Slytherin is definitely an interesting start.

In regards to canon you're a little off, as James is supposed to be a third year by the time Rose, Albus and Scorpius get to Hogwarts. You've got a lot of OCs in this fic too, so that might be discouraging people a little. Generally we like to see OCs who are funny via the POV of a singular Main Character, or we like to see other canon characters through the POV of the OC. Having so many might become difficult to keep track of.

OCs and Next-gen characters are tougher to write than the Hogwarts Era canon characters we know too, because you get to invent their personalities as the author, and a lot of authors have trouble distancing themselves from the character. Having so many here, with so many different POVs might be deterring folks a bit, so if there are characters in the mix here who aren't needed, cull them with an edit. If they're just going to be minor, they don't need to be in your opening chapter - which should always be about setting the scene for the world you're playing in and letting folks know what's going on.

I've also found in my experience that due to the above mentioned scene setting of first chapters, a lot of readers won't read the fic until there are a few chapters for them to sink their teeth into. The best way to draw in more readers is to update often and give them more to want to read. A lot of people these days won't read a WIP if they can have a completed work because they get the gratification of finishing it in one or two sittings rather than waiting ages between updates if an author is lazy like yours truly.

You're mention of formatting is notable too, as it's still a little off. The trick when posting is to use the 'PASTE AS PLAIN TEXT' button, then format the chapter in the box once it's uploaded. That way the formatting of the site doesn't have to fight the formatting of your writing program. It means you have to re-space your paragraphs again and have to re-do your bold or italic text but it makes for easier reading. The more times you edit a chapter the bigger the spaces get too, so as you edit you need to delete the extra spaces out too.

You've got an interesting beginning to this fic here, and I'm keen to read more. Thanks for being brave enough to contribute to the archives. And feel free to re-request with new chapters as you upload them =)

xx-Ellie (wolfgirl17)

Author's Response: Hi Ellie! Thanks so much for all the feedback!

I'm so sorry it took me so long to respond- I spend quite a bit of time thinking about your review. I checked a bit of websites to search around canon, and although James might be supposed to be two years older than Albus, Rose, and Scorpius, I've decided to keep him as one year older. Thanks for telling me, though- that way I can warn people that it's slightly off-canon!

After reading your advice about the OC's, and debating after a while, I've decided to change one of the OCs to a canon character, so that the number of main characters that are canon and OC are even. The first chapter's the only one that's going to be like this, and afterwards, one chapter will be a character, and sometimes even more in a row! However, all eight are needed, so I'll have to work my way around that.

I'm in the middle of writing the second chapter, too! I just need to finish writing it, which is almost down, and then editing it. I know what you mean, though. I do that quite a lot, too :/

Thank you so much for the advice on formatting! I'll be sure to try that when I add the character into the first character and put in my second chapter :)

Thank you so much for reviewing!


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Review #7, by Beeezie Prologue: The Den of Wolves

19th March 2015:
Hey! So thereís a fundraiser this month to help keep HPFF online, and right now thereís a review challenge on the forums where the House that leaves the most reviews gets a pound donated for each review they leave. Iím here to review for it, but donít worry - thereís no expectation of reciprocity or you donating just because I left it. :)

Wow. I really, really liked this. Your prose is lovely, and I got a sense of each characterís personality from your narration. It was really wonderfully done.

Making James II a Slytherin isnít something I see done very often, and Iím not sure Iíve ever seen it done like this - you basically depict a James II who is, at least superficially, very like both of his namesakes - but who ends up in Slytherin anyway. Itís not that strange, once I think about it, I guess - I tend to think that Draco and James were probably pretty similar, except that Draco was a prejudiced brat and James was a regular brat.

And Rose - I like the way youíve depicted Rose a lot, almost as much as James. We saw Harry push for Gryffindor, and that sort of made sense -- but to see someone push for Ravenclaw is a little more out of the blue, since I think weíre used to thinking of Ravenclaw as a thing you either are or you arenít. (I am, anyway.)

I loved your OCs, too. I guess I have a little less to say about them, in some ways, because there isnít all kinds of family history and cliche working with the narrative, but even so, I really enjoyed this introduction to them. I feel like you really started to get at the depth and intricacy thatís very much a part of each House (particularly with Alfie and Hufflepuff).

In your A/N, you mentioned that the chapter was boring. I didnít find it boring at all - I thought that you managed to communicate a great deal about the personality of each of your characters in a remarkably small number of words. Iím intrigued, and Iím definitely adding this story to my reading list. :)

- Branwen

(Reviewed for the HPFF Fundraiser - Ravenclaw)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing! I've heard about the review fundraiser on the forums, just haven't gotten around to it :P

And I've always thought that the Sorting Hat could see into the future a bit, and it decides what's best for you overall. People change a lot from 11 to 18, and let me just say that 11 year old James is quite a lot different than 18 year old James ;)

I'm really glad you like Rose! She's a lot different than what I imagined in my head first- I think I switched her with her cousin (Lucy)- although I do like her much better this way :D I also have my reasons for this one >:)

I also end up getting attached to OC's, and I love them so much :) I'm really glad you like them, though! (I keep wanting to put the heart but it never shows up :O)

I'm so glad you didn't think the chapter was boring, and that you liked the story! Thank you so much!


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Review #8, by kristyhes Prologue: The Den of Wolves

19th March 2015:
Hello! HPFF Fundraiser reviewer here!

I really like the way you started this story. First sentence I read made me want to know more about what it was about. I must say that it was quite intelligent of you to drop the James-is-a-Slytherin from the start. I never imagined him as other than a Gryffindor, so I'm curious as to why he was sorted there.

Each a and every character that you introduced seemed interesting in their own way. They are all different if I understand the chapter and they all have their own beliefs on the different houses in Hogwarts. I'm really looking forward to how you are going to elaborate on each of them in your story.

Also, the flow was really good and no typos noticed, so that's great! :) Hope to be reading more of this soon!

Toodles,
Cee xx

Author's Response: Aww, thanks! I put that in the front on purpose :P I've never seen him as anything other than a Gryffindor, so I decided to shake things up a bit, considering the way I imagine him in my head. And don't worry, you'll definitely find out eventually :D

Thanks for finding the characters interesting! I was a bit worried that they would all be a bit too alike :P

Thank you so much for reviewing!


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