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Reading Reviews for The Crossroads
  
6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Gabriella Hunter The Crossroads

28th August 2015:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and I am so sorry that this is so late. I have been going through a lot personally, so its been hard to find the time to get to this. D':

I don't read many stories about Peter so I thought this was a great addition to the ones that have stuck with me. Peter was never one of my favorite characters from the series but I always wondered what would have happened if he hadn't betrayed the others. I think that you've painted him here as very realistic, he's not the most good looking or talented guy around and he's struggling to get himself together. I think that a lot of people can relate to feelings of being mediocre and while I personally didn't see Peter this way, you captured his emotions and actions perfectly. I liked that you didn't take away from what he was, he suddenly didn't become this Greek stud or strut about with false confidence, he was just a normal guy who wished that he could do something more.

The fact that Peter was constantly comparing his life to his friends shows a lot of insecurity but I liked that he was there for Remus. Jealousy is a nasty thing and for a moment I thought that he would go over to the other side because you wrote that so slyly, it derailed me and caused the ending to be SO much of a shock.

I think that your character development and backstories for each of the Marauders was spot on and your flow was perfect. My only CC would be that there are a few places where a comma could have been used but other than that, this was a great story! That ending was powerful, bleak, violet and stunning.

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! The idea bounces around in my head for a while because there had to be something good about him to be friends with the other 3 but it's hard to imagine from canon. Thanks again!

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Review #2, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap The Crossroads

9th June 2015:
Wow! I've had this on my reading list for awhile. What I enjoyed about this was the focus from the beginning to end was about Peter. Yeah, I get he betrayed Lily and James and his other friends but no one ever really creates a story of how or why he got there. He's just a rat, through and through. Peter deserves a story too.

Imagine this had happened? Well, it would have changed history but still. I thought this was well written and gave me a deeper look into his character, even though his ending changed. I thought it was clever when you had the Death Eater say should he use the finger hex because that aligns with what we know actually happened in canon with Sirius. Sort of anyway.

I also enjoyed the background you gave each of them. You didn't spend too much time on the others but you gave us a glimpse of their life. I also think the story could have went either way. He was stressed, felt depressed and was looking, I think, for something more in life. It would have made some sense for him to join Voldemort. Partly anyway.

Really interesting background you gave him. Almost made him feel a little human and relatable. Wonderful.

Author's Response: Hi Deeds! Thank you for getting around to reading this.

I'm glad you enjoyed this. I know a lot of people aren't interested in reading AU stories, but I had this one in mind for a long time. I feel like the Peter Pettigrew who became friends with the other boys should have been like this and - although it would completely change the story - I wish it would have been like this.

I'm glad you liked the finger jinx. =) And thank you for giving this a chance!


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Review #3, by Katie Wallenby The Crossroads

30th May 2015:
Would that this had actually happened! Obviously it would have changed history, but when I think about what happened to James and Lily and their son, I can't help but think how much worse it was than other victims of Voldemort - because they weren't just hunted, one of the people they trusted most betrayed them.

What I enjoyed most about this story though was the lives you laid out for all of the Marauders after graduation. Though I like to think that Peter was more talented than this in his own right, I do think he was the least talented of the four and I can see where he could wind up marginalized in this way. It's certainly true that James and Sirius's wealth would have made it much easier to be strong and active contributors to the Order and arguably, perhaps that would have contributed to a sufficient estrangement to allow the betrayal that occurred in canon to take place.

Here though, Peter shows his inner Gryffindor. We see in the beginning the qualities that actually made him trusted and wanted as one of the four - deep loyalty and sincere concern for friends in need and a willingness to work hard to make fighting for the right cause possible.

Mechanically, I think this story really showcased how much can be achieved with simplicity. Soaring language, masterful metaphors, and showy descriptions weren't required to drive home the idea of who Peter really was and what he could have been dealing with at the moment he decided to turn. Instead, you left us with a characterization to think about and the lingering question of what might have been.

Author's Response: So many lovely reviews, Katie. =)

Like you, I believe Peter did have talent. I picture him as good with Charms and capable of rising in his job had things gone differently and I have him as a very good artist (he draws the Marauder's Map in my other stories). The wealth thing is pretty indisputable though, as you would know from your relationships with the boys.

Thank you for all the wonderful comments. It means a lot, especially on a less-loved story. &Hearts;


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Review #4, by Shadowkat The Crossroads

15th May 2015:
Hey, it's me! I have read, and now I shall review!!! *clears throat*

Okay, so I've honestly wondered about this topic myself. It's a pretty interesting subject, what might have happened if he'd made a different choice. I honestly don't think he was planning everything to happen how it did, but went too far and was unable to go back. What I could see happening is that maybe they threatened James, Lily, Remus, and Sirius first if he didn't spy for them for the order. Then as time progressed his options dwindled, until it came to the point where he couldn't get out. If he told his friends, it would mean admitting what he'd done, regardless of the intention. If he tried to run, he'd be killed. Then came a night where he was given the opportunity to become secret keeper, and another death eater might have found out. It was either die just so they'd one day be caught anyway, or live and betray the Potters.

Honestly, I feel bad for Peter. People always think it was a simple choice, because he resented being in their shadow. Yet, does anyone ever think of all the resources Voldemort had to convince him, ever think about how they'd handle that situation?

Don't get me wrong, I still hate the rat for what he became, but at the same time I can't help but pity him and wonder what might have happened, like with this.

A very thought provoking story on a often generalized character. Loved it. ;)

Author's Response: Thanks for all the reviews Shadowkat.

I also still hate what Peter did, but I really wanted to examine his character in more detail than he usually gets. I mean, he must have been a decent person at one point to be friends with James, Sirius, and Remus but clearly SOMETHING happened along the way to make him change. Like you, I think he just felt like the odd man out and got in over his head to the point where he couldn't back out even if he wanted to.

I'm glad you liked the new take on Peter and the "what if". Thanks again! =)


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Review #5, by oldershouldknowbetter The Crossroads

10th March 2015:
Let's see what this is like, it's not my normal fare, but the BvB has drawn me in so I'll give it a go.

I am always intrigued by these 'missing moments' scenes an event that should have been, must have been, but due to the nature of JKR's narrative line she couldn't expand upon.

We know from the events of the books that Peter wasn't brave enough to resist the lure of the Death Eaters, or was it a case that he wasn't strong enough to stand up to Voldemort. Let us see.

Getting something out of your head - I can totally understand that.

Oh, that's a nice touch, having Peter actually good at something. In the books he is (and has to be for the purposes of the story) made to be an object of ridicule and even derision. Having him being good at charms is humanising. And then all that stuff about his work and trying to make time for his friends - you have made him far more human to me in those few paragraphs than JKR did in five books.

Then we see him with James and Sirius and we see they have sort of left him behind. Always ones to undervalue him (especially Sirius), they are off doing exciting things, having adventures like they always did at school because they can. Poor old Peter has to tread the mundane path and hold down a job.

Peter is upset by it all but takes it stoically, as he probably always has done. He knows that the guys are better than him and he is thankful that they even befriended him in the first place, but that knowledge will make even the best of men resentful sometimes.

Even so, running with his 'pack' brings back some of the old memories and the belonging he craves. It's probably the happiest, even in the scary bits, that he has been for a long while.

When he is alone with James, even Moony elicits more offers of help than he does, more sympathy even. James doesn't even realise he is doing it, but to be fair, Remus needs the help and Peter is an adult now and has to learn to stand on his own two feet.

He apparates back to his singleton manor where ...

they were waiting for him, Death Eaters.

So before I go into details about what happens I must applaud you on your characterisation of Peter. It suddenly became clear to me that the Peter we see in the books was a man, stunted in his character by living in fear all of those years - fear of his old friends and their reaction to his betrayal and fear of his 'new friends' who believed him responsible for the 'death' of their master. Wow, this is fantastic, the ability to make us care for someone we know is never fully redeemed.

I'm glad you gave him some spine, some reason to be a Gryffindor. He is going to try to stand up to his captors at the beginning at least.

But his tormentors are just as horrible and vicious as you think they would be. They are almost professional in their intimidation techniques.

Quote:"Do you need me to use a finger-removing jinx?" That is superb. I can just imagine, cornered by Sirrius at the end, desperate for a way out; his mind flashing back to this moment when it all started and remembering the jinx and formulating his plan in a second of decisiveness. Well done, such a good link into his future.

They want information and they want him to get it. Not terribly proud of his own abilities, and why should he be when no one else is either, he has a moment where he suddenly thinks himself as valuable. All his experience has led him to believe he isn't - he is no use to anyone that casnnot be provided and better by someone else. This is the terrible seductive power of the dark Lord - to initially get people to want to do what he wants of them.

But the internal weakness lasts for only a moment and he resists when they start in on him again. He refuses to give them more information, but the reader begins to realise that this is more from habit now than internal fortitude. We can see the cracks beginning to spread.

He is tortured.

Torture will break men we know are stronger than Peter, but still he refuses to break. Then more torture, he tries his best to escape, and ... Death!?

Wow, I honestly didn't see that coming (possibly it was in the story description, but I am notoriously lax in reading them thoroughly). So this is the end of Peter who 'should have stuck up for his friends'. With only a bit of difference in the ending it could have been what actually happened to him - lost in the gaps within the books.

This was well done. There were only a few niggles of word usage here and there, but mostly it was well done.

It is always good to find that 'the evil villains' one is supposed to dislike are sometimes not so evil after all.

Andrew,
Oldershouldknowbetter.

Author's Response: Thank you for the wonderful in depth review! I'm glad you liked my attempts to make Peter seem more like a person than just a villain. Thanks again for all the wonderful, thoughtful comments! =)

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Review #6, by Felpata Lupin The Crossroads

26th February 2015:
Yes, this was definitely sad, but also so beautiful!
I have kind of a soft spot towards Peter... I love to imagine him as the person he should've been making different choices.
I loved the way you portayed him in here, with all his insecurities, his frustration and even his point of envy towards his friends, yet loyal and brave enough to die for them. I really didn't see it coming till it happened...
Great writing style, too. Very fluent and addictive, and wonderful descriptions.
To cut it short, a lovely one shot.
Thank you,
Chiara.

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the way I portrayed Peter. Like you, I feel like he was more complex than he often gets portrayed. I mean, the other Marauders wouldn't have been friends with a wimpy, whiny, pain in the butt. I worked hard to find the balance between portrayals.

Thanks for all the lovely comments about writing style too. I'm glad the ending was a bit unexpected and you enjoyed it.

Thanks again! =)


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