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Reading Reviews for Ariana
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Shadowkat Ariana

20th April 2015:
Oh my, I love this! I've never read a story about this character, but I've always wanted to. It's so tragic, and we know so little. I hardly saw any mistakes. I'm not sure if there's anything I can point out about this. Great job!

Author's Response: Hi Shadowkat, thanks for stopping by for our review exchange. =) I'm glad you liked my take on Ariana's final days and that you thought it was well written. Thanks again!

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Review #2, by Minion of the Easter Bunny Ariana

10th April 2015:
Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

You know, I'm pretty terrible at this whole 'stay out of sight' thing. Every time I get a little distracted by these wonderful HPFF stories, then suddenly you see me. I'm hoping you won't tell my boss. He'll be really annoyed if he finds out.

I loved the premise of this story. Ariana is such an interesting character, and I love the way you portrayed her. Your descriptions were amazing and your characterisation was spot on. It was such a sad yet beautiful piece.

Who's eyes? Hmm. I'm going to go with the idea that both Aberforth and Albus ran to her, and so it was one eye from each of them. But as she was dying her brain just assumed it was one person.

The bit that I liked most of all was the fact that she kept mentioning those three 'horrible boys' from when she was younger. They were the reason she could no longer control her magic. Yet you almost used it as a reoccurring theme. And then at the end, three different 'horrible boys' were the reason she died.

Excellent writing! But I'm afraid I must be off. Else my boss will wonder where I am! Here, have an Easter egg from me 0 . Byee

Bounce. Bounce. Bounce.

Author's Response: Hello Minion of the Easter Bunny! You are not at all scary or mean, despite being described as a minion. =)

I'm glad you like the premise! I have been thinking about this all the time when I read/watch Deathly Hallows, so I decided to finally write it to get it out of my head. I really like your take on the two eyes... I can see why the Easter Bunny keeps you on his/her side.

Thank you for your lovely review! =)

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Review #3, by horcruxxx Ariana

4th March 2015:
I'm here for the BvB Review Battle :)

I've always been wondering when JK Rowling thought of Dumbledore's family history, because what happened to all of them is so sad and tragic. I don't think she knew what she was going to write since the first book, even though she came back to the scene with the Mirror of Erised.

Anyway, back to your story!

I think the first paragraph, with Ariana studying the wallpaper, sets the mood perfectly. It shows that she is fascinated by things "normal" people wouldn't be. Well, at least not every time they saw the wallpaper. It shows that what happened to her when she was a child made her somewhat withdrawn, that she lived in her own world of some sort.

And when she tried to help her brothers, but no words come out, only powerful magic is so amazingly described. You captured it very well, how scared and confused she was, how she depended on her brothers to help her, but none of them saw what was happening to her and she was alone with her fear.

As for the blue eyes she saw in her final moment - I choose to believe they belonged to Albus, that he saw her die, was so close to helping her, maybe if he noticed his sister a couple of second earlier he would be able to save her? That would explain the guilt he felt for the rest of his life. That he was so close, but yet came too late.

Beautiful story!


Author's Response: I'm glad you liked the opening and it came across well. I wanted to illustrate how she looked at things and processed them uniquely right off the bat. Describing her as being in her own little world is the perfect way to put it. Similarly with the magic, I felt like she would obviously want to help but would have no idea how and it would end disastrously.

I'm glad to hear your take on the eyes. I wanted it to be a sort of "draw your own conclusions" situation and yours is lovely!

Thanks for the review!

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Review #4, by CassiePotter Ariana

26th February 2015:
Hello! It's Cassie here for our review swap!
I thought this story was so good! I love reading different takes on this moment, because we don't get a totally straightforward account of the circumstances around Ariana's death in Deathly Hallows. I thought the fact that you wrote about how Ariana feels prior to her death, and how she and her brothers are living now that both of their parents are gone was really interesting. I thought the scene when she described what the boys did to her was really awful. It was really, really haunting.
I think you did a really great job with this story! I definitely felt all the emotions running throughout it, and it all felt really intense. 10/10
Cassie :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the lovely review. =) I'm glad you liked how I portrayed Ariana. Given her mental state after she was attacked, I felt like it was a fine balance. Thanks again!

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