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Reading Reviews for The Story of Nicolae
  
40 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Sara Black-banded Tree Climber

4th September 2016:
OMG! This story is everything, please please write more.

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Review #2, by onestop_hpfan18 The Antipodean Opaleye

25th August 2016:
I'd like to know more about Erik... his character is just mysterious and makes me want to get to know him more.

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Review #3, by onestop_hpfan18 The Japanese Lava-Swimmer

24th August 2016:
Finally some action... yay! But sad that the egg had been abandoned. I wonder if Charlie will take it back with him.

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Review #4, by onestop_hpfan18 The Tuatarian Greybeard

23rd August 2016:
The ball is rolling, yet I'm still waiting patiently for things to really start to happen. I want some romance... more importantly, I want to meet Charlie's leading man. Solid writing so far.

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Review #5, by onestop_hpfan18 The Imperial Redhorn

22nd August 2016:
i feel like we're still in introduction mode with this story. I'm looking forward to when classes start and the ball gets rolling in the plot. Great writing so far.

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Review #6, by onestop_hpfan18 The Sahara Goldenwing

22nd August 2016:
I like the tone of the story so far and you've done a great job characterizing Charlie from the little we know about his character from canon. I'm looking forward to reading more.

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Review #7, by TreacleTart The Antipodean Opaleye

12th December 2015:
Hey Georgia!

I'm here for our swap and so excited to get back to this amazing story!

So Charlie's found an abandoned dragon egg and is trying to figure out a way to care for it or convince the director that it's abandoned. This is quite the conundrum. I understand what Andy was saying about them not having enough funding to care for every single abandoned animal. You see the same thing with dog shelters in real life all the time.

I love that they're sort of working out a strategy where all of these different people will come and rotate turns heating the egg. If everyone puts in a bit of effort, I imagine that they could keep it alive.

One thing that I really loved about this chapter is that you did a great job of demonstrating why Charlie went to work on a dragon preserve. The amount of love and care that he shows for this egg really proves that he is an animal lover. He seems far more concerned about this egg than anyone else and I have a feeling that it's going to turn out to be something really special.

All in all, another good chapter. I really love how you write Charlie and the adventure's he's had so far. I can't wait to find out what happens with the egg.

Good work!

~Kaitlin

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Review #8, by Shadowkat The Sahara Goldenwing

11th December 2015:
Hey, here for our swap!

I haven't read many like this, and it certainly looks interesting. Already you can pick out individual personalities and a few upcoming tensions, which is always a welcome tug into the story. I feel like it's going to be a really original one, and I'm looking forward to coming back.

The writing is well done, with nice details and few, or no, real errors that I spotted. It seems like we'll be hearing about some original dragons, which is always great. That's what fanfiction is about, after all. Expanding and exploring a world that there wasn't enough time to fully cover in canon.

9/10, just to be stingy! ;)

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Review #9, by Aphoride The Japanese Lava-Swimmer

6th August 2015:
Hi again, Georgia! :D I saw you'd updated, so I really wanted to get back to this asap, so I could catch up :)

I really love how you go into so much detail with the dragons - you think of and include pretty much everything: behaviour, biological reasons for the behaviour, traits and habits, tricks to dealing with them... everything. It's really, really amazing as a world, because it's so complex and you make it so real - the dragons feel just as real, just as alive and as much as characters as the people do, almost, and it's really, really incredible :) It really helps bring the whole story to life, you know? :) Plus, world-building like that is hard, and you do it so well, so you should definitely be so proud of yourself for that - it's a real skill to have!

I love Charlie so much. I love how genuinely decent he is as a person, and how you get his passion for both the dragons and for flying across so that without you ever having to say it the difficulties he must have had to choose between Quidditch and dragons - but also the reasons he chose dragons - are so clear. I'm so looking forward to how you develop him further - what happens with his friendships and so on as the story goes on, the romance (of course :P), and how he grows, because he doesn't have too many flaws at the moment (though, he's not gary stu-ish, or cliched or anything as such - just nice and solid and dependable and you make it work so well as a character!), and I'm so curious to see how he goes with those, and reacts to stress and things.

I love as well how great all of your characters are, even when they don't appear much. Sead is just still a jerk, haha, and Andy is so good for putting up with him - though perhaps foolish? I dunno... we'll have to see on that one :P - but I love how you have them all settling in and perhaps starting to find their feet, find their friendship groups, as such, and work out who actually they get on bestwith and things - it's so true to life, again.

I have to say that I loved the scene with the dragon hatching - your description of the baby dragon was to die for, it sounded so cute! :) And I'm so excited to see what's going to happen with the egg he finds - if it is abandoned, if it's going to die or if he manages to save it. I hope it gets saved... :(

Your writing in this was great. I already talked about your characters, and you give Charlie such a brilliant voice in this it's so lovely: it's so clear and so unique, and so honest, too, about what he thinks and feels about things. It's so great, and says so much about him as a character. As I said before, your description is great, and your dialogue is so so good - it's so cleverly done!

I really, really love this story. If this isn't in my favourites already, it's going in, because I'm going to have to keep reading this :)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Hello! I know I say it in every response, but I really just can't thank you enough for taking the time to read this story and write such fantastic reviews.

You have no idea how much I appreciate you noticing how much thought I put into the biological side of dragons... I'm a biology student, and I have SO much fun just thinking about how I can fit these creatures into what makes sense to me.

...Seriously, just so much fun.

Charlie is totally someone I'd like to have in my life. He is flawed, moreso than we've seen so far at this point, but those flaws just haven't come up yet very much. You're totally right in that his major flaws come through when he's stressed, or when things aren't going right.

I'm not gonna say anything about the dragon egg ;)

YOU'RE JUST SO SWEET. I'm sitting on a couch in a random hallway at my university (it's my first day and this is the only building I've ever been in... I'm going to stay on this couch as long as I can...) and I'm just smiling like an idiot, reading this review. Thank you SO much.

-Georgia


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Review #10, by Aphoride The Tuatarian Greybeard

4th August 2015:
Hi again, Georgia! :) Hopefully you won't get too sick of me before this whole thing is finished (seven more chapters to go, waah! :P)! ;)

(Though, tbh, then you'll just have to updated ;) :P)

Ah, I loved this chapter! :D I loved them all going to the pub, and, well, just everything about that scene: how Charlie was so happy to be the person who knew everyone at the beginning, how Opal convinced him to dance, the little snippets about Andy and Sead's relationship we learned in this (and boy, intense is definitely the right word to describe him, haha :P), and how Opal kisses him at the end, and she really doesn't mind just sort of does that drunken outward thought train, haha, and metaphorically shrugs and goes to sleep :P It was just so good and so lovely - and so very natural and typical of students of any kind, haha. I really liked how Fabian, the day after, had the hangover potion he'd used, hehe, and didn't care Charlie's gay - there's something so true to life about it, I think, that often people aren't bothered, or are less bothered than people think - it's just that those who are shout louder, you know? But anyway, I loved Fabian reminding him about class, too - poor Charlie! :P

(Though it is his own fault, so maybe not.. :P)

I also really liked the scene with them in class - so many stories just skip over any kind of class time because it's 'boring' so I love you included it! :D Plus, the teacher's name, omg... if my teacher had a name like that I'd have to practice saying it in front of a mirror to avoid accidentally sniggering in class or something :P

The bit with him worrying about his mum's reaction, and him describing what he thinks it would be is so so great, too. There's something so true about it - about how Charlie presumes she'll react and how he can't bear to face it, and that's sort of a whole bunch of his motivation to do well at the programme. It was such a brilliant description - so so right, and in character for both Charlie and Molly, and I loved it so much :)

As always, your writing in this was incredible. Your description was amazing - I loved, like I said, all your character descriptions, especially Molly's, and how you described their night out. (The only thing I'd say is that I wouldn't use the word 'spastic' because it can be seen as offensive to disabled people ;)) Your dialogue was amazing in this too - I loved the bits of humour you used; they worked so so well :)

Another great chapter! :D

Aph xx

Author's Response: I'll never get tired of your reviews!!!

I'm hoping to be more consistent about updates... I'm really hoping to. Once I'm back in school, it'll either be easier or more difficult... we'll see.

Fabian is really... chill. There's not a whole lot that could make him dislike a person, and he's just a really great guy.

That name was the result of Nano. That was the whole thinking-while-writing (or really... just not thinking), and I typed something and that's what came out. It ended up working through, so I kept it haha.

Thanks for catching that! If I'm not mistaken that's a word that varies level of appropiatness regionally, so I'll be sure to edit it out :)

Thank you thank you again!

-Georgia


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Review #11, by Aphoride The Imperial Redhorn

4th August 2015:
Hey again, Georgia! :) So it's a little while later than I expected (blame the House Cup ;D), but I'm back! :D

I know I said this before, but I really, really do love this story. There's something so beautifully in-depth and complicated about the world you've created which makes it so real and so strangely simple to understand, because of the way it sort of connects, with the dragon training programme so like real-life post-school vocational things, and the way it sounds almost like any other real life animal sanctuary - perhaps a bit low on funds, but full of people who care about the animals they look after :)

I love your characters, too - Charlie is just so great. I love how he deliberately tries to somewhat arrogantly down-play his Quidditch abilities, haha, but then admits it when Andy prods him for them. I love that Charlie's making friends - and, actually, that a lot of his perhaps closest friends at the moment are girls, it's a refreshing change, and really, imo, ties into the fact that in the wizarding world it's made reasonably clear that magical evens the playing field. You've really captured that 'I'm new and hi everyone' kinda feel you get at a new school, or training school/camp or whatever. It's so so brilliant! :)

Okay, I have to talk about the Quidditch! First off: I really, really don't like Sead. There was no reason for him to be so rude and so aggressive simply because a girl he was engaged to wants to play on the same team as another guy. It's just... there's something almost controlling about that, you know? It's a very possessive characteristic and one I don't really like. But, that means he's a great character - I love the sense you give of there being so much history between him and Andy and perhaps Charlie's sort of unknowingly got into the middle of more than he knows. Poor bloke :(

Your writing in this is so lovely too - it's so descriptive, and so great; all of the emotions in this, the excitement, the sheepishness, the anger, they all come through so brilliantly, and really bring the whole story to life. Your dialogue is so great, too - I love how you're so aware of giving different characters slightly different voices, it lends such a great voice in general to the story :)

I'm so so glad I found this - it's so great, and I'm so looking forward to reading the next chapter! :)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Aph!

This is just... ADKJS;FKA. I have so much trouble expressing how fantastic these reviews are, and responding to them in a way that doesn't seem lazy.

I wrote this during my first semester at college, so I think there's a lot of my experiences with what's going on with Charlie, and I definitely used him to help process some of my own insecurities and anxiety.

Your feelings towards Sead are understandable and shared by me. He tends to be very possessive, yeah. Some of that is just him being that type of person, and some of it is explained by the past. I'm really glad that you like the characters! I'm really making an effort to make believable characters, with depth.

Your reviews seriously just mean the world to me. Thank you so much!

-Georgia


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Review #12, by Hannah B The Mediterranean Coral Dragon

31st July 2015:
I really like the slow build and how into dragon training Charlie is, he's as passionate about it as the HP series alludes to. He and Erik and their excitement over the hatchlings are adorable but I like that you've pointed out that Charlie still doesn't really know anything about him. I'd love to read more!

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Review #13, by Aphoride The Sahara Goldenwing

30th July 2015:
Hey there, Georgia! :) I spotted this in the Claw updates thread, and since it's BvB fest so anything goes - that and I have a huge weakness for Charlie/Original Male Character romances - so I just had to stop by! :)

Can I just say first off that I love so much that your chapter titles/summaries are all different types of dragon - and not just the ones from the series, which JKR talked about. I always love themes of things, haha, and it just really brings the story to life almost before it starts - with all the information there, and it makes the world you've created for Charlie and the sanctuary so rich in detail. It's so so lovely!

I love your Charlie, too. I love how, since we don't see much of him in canon so there's so much to embellish on, you've developed him in a way which makes him seem like the kind of guy who'd get his friends to bring him a Norwegian Ridgeback, haha. He's so excited and enthusiastic and seems pretty caring and friendly, too, and I love that you sort of play on those traits in this first chapter - especially by adding the nerves. The Charles moment made me laugh! :P Poor guy...

I'm so curious to see what happens with this - what happens with the egg he finds, how the romance develops (and with who!), and just how he grows, you know, with his friends and with the sanctuary in general. Like, I love how you introduce it all in this chapter, and I really, really wanna know what happens next - what happens at Quidditch (if anything), what classes are like, just everything!

(Confession: I, um, found this story last night and may have read the entire thing in one go :P Oops? But I don't regret it at all :D)

I love your writing in this, too - it's so clean and so clear (though I did spot a few typos/mix-ups of where/were and things, so it might be work looking it over again just once for those?), and your words convey all the emotion so so well. I could really feel his nervousness and worry at the beginning, when he'd apparated, and the sort of confusion when he asked where the dragons were, and his enthusiasm about them - it's so so great! :)

I'm so so glad I found this story - favouriting so I don't miss things! - and I'll be back soon ;)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Hey! I'm going to try to get all of these amazing reviews responded to tonight, because... really, they're just amazing. I can't thank you enough for leaving these for me. I'll ramble about it a lot in every single response.

I'm glad that you noticed (and liked) the chapter titles. I always struggle with chapter titles, so this seemed like a good way to make it original. I have a really dorky spreadsheet with all of the dragons and their characteristics.

I really do need to go over these chapters again. The first 35k or so was NaNo (the rest of the 50k was either non-chronological or rubbish)

Again... I can't thank you enough for these reviews. Getting these and rereading them motivates me to keep writing, and keep posting. Thank yo uso much!

-Georgia


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Review #14, by Roisin The Ukranian Ironbelly

15th July 2015:
OK, I'ma do a good review before I go to bed! The last was an unfair ratio of concrit, and I didn't even really get into the meat of the chapter and talk about all the things I loved (of which there were many).

SO, this chapter! (reviewing as I go):

One thing I didn't point out last time, but want to comment on, is that I see a sort of difference between Charlie's /mind/ and how he presents himself. Like, I mentioned his naivete, and his sweetness, but in interactions like in the lunch-line with Sead--he comes off as a lot more assured than I think he really is. This is kind of brilliant. Like, we're all more scared and confused in our minds than we come off to others. And again, Charlie seemed so COOL and GROWN UP in PS (which is only a few months away from where we are now). And maybe he does seem that way, sometimes, to some people. It's a cool disconnect between interiority and outward presentation--and it's subtle, but very apt!

Oh, and, that's why I love Asha so much (I haven't mentioned in a while, but I love her more and more every time I see her). She kind of DOES see Charlie for the little delicate flower he is, and has a very cute relationship/mentorship with him.

One CC: you gave such great and specific descriptions of all the characters when they were first introduced (Adam, Anthony, etc), but I kind of can't remember who was what. Andy, Asha, Fabian, Marius, and Sead Caroline stick out, but the others are harder to remember. Maybe go through and remind us, with visual cues, which one was what? (also, this typo made me giggle: 'the hold, card, upper floor'--I DO THAT ALL THE TIME)

I have to admire how WELL you provide specific details into mindsets. Like, Charlie asking Adam for directions and then panicking a little bit about not wanting to turn back and being like 'oh crap.' That probs happens to me like once a week. It's such a subtle anxiety, and one you forget as soon as it's over, but so REAL. And not something I've ever seen described so aptly before. Or at all. This story is so dense with relatable realisms, and I love it!

Wait--head-hopping! 'He [erik] usually didnít interact much with the students' is Erik's POV. Remember to stay in Charlie's unless you do a scene break and switch. Otherwise, use 'it seemed like' or 'charlie noticed' or something :)

SHIPPING ERIK/CHARLIE SO HARD RIGHT NOW. I LOVE ERIK.

Oh my gosh this bit with Charlie and Andy and Fabian and shrivelfig is just SO BRILLS. Like, I'm actually grinning like a FOOL right now! I appreciate that you aren't being coy with the shippage happening, and very realistically showing the embarrassment of crushin' behavior. DELIGHTFUL.

Oh man, I've totally met Eriks. I call them Lab Punks--which isn't to say they have Mohawks or anything, just that they're really cool and into their work and weird and awesome. They like, defy stereotypes of scientists, yet they are such a THING that they should be their own stereotype. Like, they treat their research with the same wild enthusiasm other people would treat playing guitar.

Another head-hop: 'Charlie was so youthful.' It's a nice comment, but I think you can get it across while staying in Charlie's POV.

OH GOSH WHAT A CUTE ENDING! There were SO many moments and things that I loved, but couldn't comment on because I was too engrossed int the story. Honestly, if I were to discuss everything I loved, the review would be longer than the chapter itself!

SUH GOOD

xoxo
Roisin

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Review #15, by Roisin The Catalonian Fireball

15th July 2015:
GUH short review because I want to keep reading!

This story is so smart and so compelling and exciting! I recommend getting a beta, as there tend to be a peppering of typos (especially at the most exciting parts - again, fast writing). But this story is SO GOOD that it really deserves the care of committed second eyes to tighten and polish and suggest fleshing out where needed. All of the characters are so fantastic, and I LOVED that Diaz wasn't just a two-dimensional Big Bad. The reasoning he had for being curt with Charlie was super sound, and it was clever the way you made me SUPER on Charlie's side, and then pointed out how he'd failed to consider the next steps.

THIS STORY IS GREAT

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Review #16, by Roisin The Antipodean Opaleye

15th July 2015:
TROPHIC CASCADE! So you are a scientist too, I see. I'd suspected as much, but now it is confirmed! Your attention to the science throughout is really refreshing to read--not something one usually gets from HPFF :P Even though you're writing about magic and dragons at all, there's a keen attention to world-building around things like ecology to make it super convincing.

And I love the idea that, even if muggles don't know about magical creatures, they're still a part of the ecosystem, and changes to magical ecology would end up affecting muggles as well. That's just, like, TRUE, but also a really interesting idea. Like, I'd never thought of attributing RL biological or ecological realities to wizarding stuff in fics, but it could TOTALLY get sold!

I also love seeing how genuinely enthusiastic Charlie is about dragons :) You really do a great job of SHOWING how much he loves this work!

One CC: make sure to italicize every time you do present-tense Charlie thoughts (like "Maybe sheís still by the maternity pen with the dragons")

I'm also really enjoying the very realistic naivete that Charlie has. Like, I remember reading PS for the first time as a tiny child and thinking he was so grown up. But yeah, that would have been his first year out of Hogwarts, and now 18 doesn't seem old to me at all anymore. It never feels over-played though, just realistic. Someone at that age, in a brand new environment, would certainly be a bit bright eyed and bushy tailed and generally out of their element.

Also, I'm constantly impressed at how nuanced this is, and how much you thought of--like there being a director more consumed by funding than dragonology anymore. That is SUCH a thing. You've just hit every single angle here and built such a complete world, and I can't wait to see how all these threads come together!

That Andy didn't think that there would actually be an egg where Charlie said there would be an egg says a lot about the people she's used to hanging around, I think. She really is just so interesting.

What a great plot. A great, great plot.

(Also, I've been shipping Charlie/Erik since the last chapter)

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Review #17, by Roisin The Japanese Lava-Swimmer

14th July 2015:
So this review will probably be a bit shorter than others, since I just finished the chapter and am not reviewing as I go. Anyway, AH, SO GOOD!

I loveloveLOVE all the stuff about dragons, and how well thought out everything from their behavior to physiology is! I also like the idea that not all dragons are massive behemoths, and that there are some little and harmless varieties. Also, it was really smart to do a scene about a dragon egg hatching before the scene about him discovering the abandoned egg - it established a lot of the info we needed to know, like the constant stream of fire, in advance.

As for concrit, I feel like sometimes the writing was a little bit rushed. The chapter was excellent, and I loved everything that happened and the structure, but I'd have liked to see some things fleshed out with more description. Like, the first time we see a dragon should be more sort of grand and striking - and I'd liked to have seen it described more. If you have time, I recommend going back and just filling things out a little bit more - also, there was a peppering of teeny spelling errors and things, which you'd certainly catch on another read through. But, all of these issues seem mostly to be the result of fast writing - the kind of fast, excited writing of a good chapter. And it really WAS a good chapter, so I'm not surprised.

Back to the cleverness of the structure, I really liked how Charlie's characterization came through so well. I love him more and more by the second. The thing about his awe at seeing the newborn dragon and his concern for its well-being perfectly built up to the discovery of the egg. WELL DONE.

You pre-wrote this story, right? Rather than writing and uploading chapter by chapter? I can tell, because it does feel like a really COMPLETE and well-plotted story. Serialized fics often pick up and drop threads throughout, sometimes ignoring certain subplots for chapters on end. Here, it builds and progresses more like an OF novel. You seem to have a firm grasp on the characters and arcs and movements of it (his relationship with his mum, his studies, Andy/Sead, etc), and it's just a joy to read.

ALSO, I just realized, NORBERTA IS GONNA BE IN THIS, RIGHT?!?! Because Ron is about to start his first year, so Charlie's gonna fly to England at some point to collect the dragon!

BRILLIANT! AH! I'm SO excited for that!

On to the next :D

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Review #18, by Roisin The Tuatarian Greybeard

14th July 2015:
I'm just loving how well thought out this whole story is. You thought of everything! And also, I like stories that feature a lot of academia and things. It seems like even fics set at Hogwarts often gloss over the actual SCHOOL part, and I've read whole novels set at Hogwarts where the characters are never once shown studying or attending lessons. So yeah, I'm loving all the world building you've done here when it comes to their studies!

I'm not surprised that Andy would fall in love super fast and enter an intense relationship. She seems like the type. Also, I'm SUPER curious about what happened to break them up so fast.

Hm, I also like your point about dragon trainers maybe being a bit mad. Like, the line about only caring about dragons and each other struck an interesting chord. Dragons are big, dangerous, fiery, impressive, and so on. It makes sense that a certain type of person - rash, and romantic - would be drawn to that work.

Oh man, you're dangling so many ships right now! Charlie/Andy, Charlie/Caroline, Charlie/Opal -- and I still have my fingers crossed for a Charlie/Nicolae (assuming it isn't a dragon :P) But I think that's really realistic, with so many young people in close quarters.

I'M INTO BLOKES! YUSS! Also, what a great, drunken little moment. So well done :) "but I'm into girls and you're not a girl" - haha. I like Opal.

I also liked this line a lot: 'Charlie woke the next morning to the sound of his blaring alarm and thought that he was going to die.' The ending had a real easy wit to it.

Bahahaha, put pajamas over his jeans :P

All of the characters and their dialogue is so realistic and great. I'm loving the dynamics you've created!

'You have a good time in there, mate?' --THANK YOU for bringing this up! Especially in a story about BOYS. Like, somehow, every fic ever seems to forget that masturbation is a thing that happens and gets talked about and joked about sometimes.

Also, I like Fabian :)

I like the contrast you show between the professors, too - super realistic. And man, Andy. She really is so interesting and odd. I can really see the character you're describing with her.

Also, I like the way you're kind of withholding the actual DRAGONS, yet offering tantalizing little bits. It's a great device to build up the anticipation, and one I'm super enjoying :)

FAVORITED!

xoxo
Roisin

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Review #19, by Roisin The Imperial Redhorn

14th July 2015:
BACK!

I'm really loving how different the atmosphere and pace of this program is from Hogwarts. It reminds me a bit of kids starting college in America, and being surprised not to have homework or get attendance checked. It's def different from college or uni though - more like field training. But yeah, Charlie seems surprised not to get reprimanded, and it's clear that the kind of self-motivated hands on nature of the program is new to him. And again, it's all SUPER realistic and believable. I did a summer fellowship field research thingy a while back in Kenya, where we were all living in tent-cabin things and stuff, and yeah - it was still intense and competitive, but also kind of more casual because you're living and working with everyone else 24/7 in a remote area. Plus, so much expanded freedom and individual responsibility. Love that I see that here (like, GO LEARN ENGLISH IF YOU LIED).

Hahaha--I'm also loving how Charlie is getting annoyed by all the reiteration at the orientation. That is SO how orientations are!

Oh man, all your characters are so interesting and I can't wait to hear more about them! I really liked the observation of the one dude who looked about 14 - that is SUCH a thing! I know a bunch of people in their twenties who still look like preteens :P

'You look like a baby, but an old baby. Like youíve had other babies to take care of.' What a cool line! I like Asha.

I also really liked hearing about all the Weasleys from Charlie's perspective. He almost strikes me as vaguely Hufflepuff-y - like maybe he was a Hat Stall before being sorted into Gryffindor. (One little canon pick, though: in the books, Ron is described as tall and gangly, while Charlie is described as shorter and stocky).

Oh man, Antonia. I'm really glad that that's something you included. It's a sad reality that at schools and things, every so often, a peer passes away. I imagine that has to be even more true when it comes to dragonology. But I think you really captured what the experience of losing a peer does to the community. Like, Asha talking about how it was before her time, and the existence of the garden, and it being hard on students. It all really rings true.

(One little CC tho: this isn't really a problem, and I wouldn't suggest making any changes, but I thought I'd point it out for your general benefit. You have a lot of A names here - Astra, Asha, Adam, Antonia, Andy, Anthony - I once read that people gravitate towards A names when making names up. I also had a creative writing teacher who cautioned against introducing characters with alliterative or rhyming names [Ricky and Nicky, Gina and Georgia] because it makes it harder for readers to tell them apart. Again, I think it's fine here, but I thought I'd mention it anyway :))

Hah, having an underwhelming library is SUPER realistic. Facilities at field research sites tend to have just the bare minimum, and yeah, often user maintained. Our library in Kenya was just three bookshelves of random guides and texts and out of order journals :P

Bahahaha, "Flame=Bad, Safe=Good" made me snort-giggle. I'm also loving how everyone in this fic is from different places. It makes sense, and I'm glad you took that opportunity!

And ha! Hitchhikers Guide! That was such a funny twist after all the other titles! (Which were really well thought out and realistic sounding)

Heheh, I liked the "a bit, here and there" thing ;) Nice reference to Charlie being an ace seeker

Aww, Charlie is such a sweetie. I'm liking him more and more!

"I want Charlie" -- Getting double entendre vibes off this one *wiggles eyebrows*

Hm, I'm super curious about why Andy was crying. I'm not sure I exactly like her, but she's an interesting character who I'm keen to learn more about. Her personality seems a bit wild and erratic, which is always fun to read. I'm also just so stoked about all these characters, they all seem so dimensional and fleshed out!

Also, the ending here is just great. I can't wait to read on, and I love the little bit about them all getting a drink even though they have classes the next day. Again, you're really nailing the pace and atmosphere of this kind of program and their age!

LOVE this story! On to the next :D

xoxo
Roisin

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Review #20, by Roisin The Sahara Goldenwing

14th July 2015:
HELLO!

Gosh, I'm the worst. I'm SO SORRY I've taken SO LONG with this swap. Everything was all mellow and I was like "I wanna R&R" - then RL decided to do thing and HC distracted me and GUH. But HERE I AM NOW.

I'm so stoked on this story :) I read this chapter back when I first posted about the swap, and I just LOVE how much you worked out about the training and education and all. It's all so convincing and compelling and you clearly put a lot of thought into it. Such a joy to read! I've never seen something quite like this before :)

All the details about the program remind me of like, college mixed in with field research and things, and it's such excellent! Like, the line about how Asha lived in the cabins before but now lives in the village reminded me of on and off campus housing. It's just, yeah, SO REALISTIC and great!

Hah--I totally agree with Bette. Boys are MUCH easier to live with :)

Found two little typos: 'starled' instead of 'startled' and 'wear (she was sitting)' instead of 'where' (in the Andy sequence).

I'm also loving Charlie's characterization. You're really nailing his sort of transition into this new environment and adulthood. Also, the point about him never having had much alone time - good observation. He had a huge family, and then shared a dorm at a boarding school. Def not one to have had much time to himself.

Hm - so this really isn't a big deal, but I'm not sure how Charlie could only be 17. His birthday is in December, and you have to be at least 11 to begin a term at Hogwarts (Hermione turned 12 a week into her first term), so Charlie would have been 18 when he graduated. Again, no biggie, just thought I'd point it out :)

I'm really interested in where this story is going to go! I'd always imagined Charlie being gay, and the banner plus the LGBTQA tag left me assuming that this story would feature a same sex pairing, but I'm also getting some flirtation vibes off of Andy. That's a really interesting twist on what I was expecting. Plus, I can't help but notice that I've yet to meet Nicolae (unless that's a dragon not a person??) Anyway, I can't wait to see where it all goes!

Thank you so much for this swap - and for being so patient with me! This is such a cool and unique story and I'm so pleased I found it :D

xoxo
Roisin

Author's Response: Oh my god. These reviews were so worth waiting for. I'm seriously just... I'm so thankful right now for how amazing these are!! I'm getting to bed so I won't be responding to the others tonight, but I wanted to at least respond to this one so I can just thank you profusely.

It's sort of meant to be a bit like super casual university, yeah! I'm glad you think that's realistic rather than just lazy uni or something...

Thanks for pointing out those typos! I am looking to edit these first chapters (there are also some slight continuity issues I'd like to clear up...)

UGH Thank you for pointing out the age thing. I don't know why but ages are so difficult for me. I'll even work out spreadsheets and things, but I still screw it up! I don't know why!

Okay I'll just spoil it for you a little. Nicolae is not a person ;). And the pairings will be figured out hehe. Eventually. There might be some anger, some screaming, some broken hearts. You know, the usual.

Seriously these reviews you've left me are some of the nicest I've ever received, and I'm just... so thankful. I might actually just not go to bed and respond to these now because WOW!

-Georgia





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Review #21, by AlecJamesCaius_ The Japanese Lava-Swimmer

13th July 2015:
Hiya. Multi swap here again.

Talking primarily about the first part of this chapter:
I'm sorry that I have to bring this one up again, but the pacing was a bit off in this chapter. I'm not trying to be mean or anything, its just how I feel. You did alot better in the previous chapter in my opinion. You see, I think your problem is you WRITE too much. You leave alot of unnecessary stuff in. Perhaps you could scratch 1/6 of this chapter without it losing any meaning. Possibly even more. It can become a little tedious at times (again, in my opinion)

The second and third part were much better and very interesting. Watching the dragon being hatched, Charlies solo adventure at the end. Still, lack of grammar/spelling mistakes. My only problem with this story is the pacing, except for that you're doing a wonderful job in my opinion!

Alec

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Review #22, by AlecJamesCaius_ The Tuatarian Greybeard

13th July 2015:
Hiya, back with our multi swap.

I liked this chapter much better than the previous one: in the prior one my main problem was the pacing. It was much better here, good job!
There were still a few slow parts, but that may just be me, since I'm all about fast paced stories. I'm happy that Chaflie is gay (damn that sounds weird coming from a heterosexual guy) because it just fits him so well, in my opinion. If anyone in the canon would be gay, (except Dimbledore ofc) it'd be him. He never married or dated and always said his only love were his 'dragons' which always sounded like a very lazy cover up to me.
My favorite scene was the drunkenly dancing scene, since its always fun to watch/read people getting so drunk things get out of hand. I have to be honest, at this point most main characters still aren't that differentiated to me, but I feel like you'll get to that in the next chapters. I like how they're taking classes and stuff, it really takes me back to Hogwarts and this really feels like an adequate Dragon Taming college. I hope you have the subjects they're taking all fleshed out well.

Hope you liked my thoughts!

Alec

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Review #23, by AlecJamesCaius_ The Imperial Redhorn

8th July 2015:
Hey, here for our multichaptered review swap.

Firstly, those chapter descriptions... Do you get those dragons from somewhere or completely make it up? I suspect the latter, and if I'm right, I'm impressed because they sounds very professional and canon.

As for the story, I like the overall setting and possibilities. The story can still go several ways as the plot hasn't picked up yet. You did introduce a sh*tload of characters however, which was confusing. I suspect we'll get to know them over the next chapters. The quidditch scene was by far my favorite scene of this chapter, because it was more 'action packed' and character (personality) heavy.
This ties in with what I consider this chapters (and overall story) greatest downside atm: Its pacing.
The story is in my opinion, up until this point at least, kinda slow. The pacing may pick up though.
I like how you designed the system at the school and how everything works, you can tell you put thought in it. Also, I commend you for your lack of spelling mistakes. You did have some minor grammar mistakes though.
hope you liked my review! Waiting on yours!

Alec

Author's Response: Hello again!

The dragons are a mix of canon and made-up. Some of them are based off of actual reptiles (like the Tuatarian Greybeard is based off the Tuatara, a lineage of reptiles closely related to lizards, the Irish Viviparious is based off the viviparious lizard, which is a northern-european lizard species).

I do struggle with pacing and with keeping all these characters in order. The first couple of chapters probably will feel slower, because I want to make sure the cast has sort of been set before racing off.

Thanks again!

-Georgia


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Review #24, by SunshineDaisies The Sahara Goldenwing

7th July 2015:
Hello! here for our swap!

This was a lovely chapter! Charlie is such an interesting character and it's such a shame we don't get to read more about him. It's such fun to read stories from his perspective! And you know, it's always fun to read about dragons. I love the chapter titles and summaries. :)

This was a brilliant introduction to the story! It gives us a solid foundation of Charlie's character, and I think it fits pretty perfectly into canon. I liked his musings on the makeup of the women he encountered. Not in the sense that it's a charming thing for him to be doing of course, but I think it's a very realistic thing for him to be doing. It definitely makes him a more of a real person.

I really liked Asha and and Andy as well. They were both so vibrant, even in the little we saw of them. I'm certainly looking forward to seeing them develop even further.

I think this is a really excellent first chapter in general. You gave us enough information to really assimilate to the new situation right along with Charlie, but not so much that it was overwhelming. It held my interest and made me want to continue reading.

Great work!

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Review #25, by AlecJamesCaius_ The Sahara Goldenwing

7th July 2015:
Hey there. Here for the review swap.

Sorry I'm a bit late, I actually had a full long review for you written, but when I clicked on 'post' the hpff servers went out, and my whole review was gone... I kinda lost the motivation to rewrite it all over again. This review will most likely feel a bit less genuine now, sorry, I hope you understand.

So yeah, I was skeptical when first reading this, because I never liked Charlie. He was by far the least fleshed out Weasley, and I can't help but feel he was added by Rowling for the sheer purpose of making the odd number of "6 Weasley children" a 7 (well, 6 is odd in the wizarding world at least)

However, in this story he seems quite likeable. I also must commend you, I hardly noticed any grammar/spelling mistakes if at all, which you pretty much never see. What intrigued me the most about this story was however the location: A school for learning how to deal with Dragons? Will this be a hybrid -Hogwarts story where we'll follow Charlie in his school year(s) at this college/university/thingie? That seems so interesting and original! Curious to see what you'll do with this.

The other characters, all oc till this point, were nicely done as well by the way.

I'd love to do a multichaptered swap on the stories we reviewed for each other, if you're interested? Anyhow, good job!

Alec

Author's Response: Hey, don't worry about any delays! I totally understand, especially with how fickle the archives were for a while there :)

I'm the opposite - I've always loved Charlie. He's a bit like Next-Gen for me, in that we know little frames about him, but there's so much we can fill in.

This is the first in a trilogy. Because he did well enough on his NEWTs, Charlie was able to skip the first year of training, so he's starting in his second year. This novel will follow him through that year, the second book will follow him through his final year of training, and the third will be after that.

Because it's Charlie, pretty much all the characters will be OC's. My other longer work is also mostly OC's (the only canon character really being Fenrir Greyback), so I'm more used to writing OC's than canon, haha.

Thanks for the review! I look forward to the rest of our swaps!


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