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Reading Reviews for and the girl in white...
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Ron 4 Hermione she is your rose...

14th April 2017:
Hey there, here for CTF!

Well this was sad.

I loved how this was written though, it was really beautiful, and there was almost a poetic feel to it with the repetition of ‘But you would gladly give up all of your air for her smile, her laugh, her daring heartbeat. She is your Rose.’ Although that probably made the end feel even sadder when it changed to ‘she was your Rose.’

I think this was really well thought out as well, your choice of moments to talk about was really thought provoking. It just showed how everything seemed to be going really well and then suddenly it wasn't and she felt like she had no choice but to kill herself.

It was strange reading it from the perspective of someone else because then there's no answers. We don't know why she did it, or what made her go to that place. Had she always been there and he just didn't realise? It leaves a lot of questions but I suppose that works as it makes us feel like scorpious who also has no answers. It was strange that her family placed all the blame on him though, they should be helping each other through there grief together.

I thought this was a great one-shot and I liked how you wrote it about it.

-Shaza :)

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Review #2, by SunshineDaisies she is your rose...

14th April 2017:
Wow I was not prepared for that. At all. Here I am reading through the first three paragraphs all smiley and happy at the beautiful prose and sweet story and then BAM. NO MORE HAPPY. So I'm mostly gonna comment on the first three paragraphs because those last two are too devastating to think about too much.

This whole thing is structured beautifully. I love that each paragraph starts and ends the same way. I feel like that can be really easy to overdo and make a story repetitious, but it worked so well here! It really added to the lyrical quality of the piece on the whole. And the change in the last paragraph was absolutely killer.

I also really like that you decide to portray Rose and Scorpius's relationship in short snippets like this. It was really nice to see them as children, teenagers and adults, and to see how they have always had a connection. Or at least, Scorpius has always been fascinated by her.

Your prose in general is just gorgeous, it definitely reads like a prose poem, with the low of the words and the repetition at the beginning and end. Your imagery is so beautiful, you definitely did an amazing job of painting pictures in the mind. I could totally envision Rose twirling around in the grass as a child. Although I just looked back and realized that might not be talking about her as a child. Oops.

Anyway, in the last two paragraphs, I think you approached the subject in a very tasteful way. Nothing was too gruesome, and the feeling was very realistic.

Great job, Lo!

katie.

Hufflpuff CtF

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Review #3, by jessicalorewrites she is your rose...

13th January 2015:
Hey!

Wow. I'm completely blown away by this. YOU'RE KILLING ME! It flows so poetically throughout and I just let myself believe it was going to be some cute poetry thing about Scorpius and Rose and how cute their life would be together but then you killed it. You killed Rose.

Although, allusions to suicide if I'm not wrong? How devastating. Poor poor Rose. And poor Scorpius too! That last line is beyond heartbreaking I can't deal with the past tense it's so awful she felt she had to die when she had such a ray of sunshine in Scorpius by her side.

And of course, it's all in 500 words (near enough)! 500! I've written for the Every Word Counts challenge and I find it so difficult but yet my chapters seem longer than this, somehow. This is exceptional. Beyond anything anyone else could dream about: it's beautiful.

I feel like I should wrap this up now because I'm just rambling and gushing because it's beautiful. Okay, sorry, bye!! Thanks for such a great read!

xo

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #4, by Aakanksha she is your rose...

12th January 2015:
Beautiful. You portrayed their whole life in just a few pages, and that too, with remarkable skill. I could feel the pain , if you you can make someone feel like that , you are a truly talented writer.

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #5, by ReeBee she is your rose...

10th January 2015:
WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME LO. WHY. WHY. OK I LOVED. I CANT. here for our swap by the way :)

Plot: ok it killed. I think my favourite snap shots were the first few with the innocence of child characters and just the progression! I think you choose wonderful wonderful and wonderful scenes from life that actually killed. Like it was so cute.

Description: OMG. OMG. YOU ARE MY IDOL. LIKE NO KIDDING. YOU ARE MY IDOL!!! LIKE SERIOUS. I LOVED IT. IT WAS SO REMINICENT AND NOSTALGIC AND OVERALL PERFECT. AND THE REPITITION ADDED THIS THIS EVER MORE HEARTBREAKING TOUCH. AND THE PAST TENSE. it killed me. The end. The 'she was your rose' OMG.

Anyway I'm sorry that was really blubbery and too many caps but I can't help it too good pleaseforgiveme please. Anyway that was amazing.

-Curie :)

Author's Response: Hi Curie!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #6, by Crumple-Horned Snorkack she is your rose...

9th January 2015:
The reason I, the Snorkack, am so elusive and have never been seen by the eyes of wizards or witches before is because I cry so much at sad stories, like this one.

You wrote this so wonderfully, and I love the imagery of Rose as projecting such a vision of sunshine and laughter and beauty and the way Scorpius loves her. The beginning is just so lovely and I wish it could have stayed that way, with them staying happy.

The different snapshots you chose to write as well were so well chosen - first such an innocent moment, then the beginning of falling in love, then their wedding, and then her death, and finally Scorpius grieving alone. It's a huge contrast and shows how much he's lost, and in addition how different Rose was to an outsider versus in her own mind. It makes me so sad that her family blames him :'(

Despite how sad this is and how difficult the topic, it really is a beautiful fic. I will now sob my way back into the wilds and grieve with my BFF the Yeti.

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #7, by The Basilisk she is your rose...

9th January 2015:
Hiss Hiss. I was taking a stroll through the pipes and I sniffed out your story and now I'm here to petrify you with my review! Hiss Hiss.

I must say, you've petrified me with your story here!!
I loved, loved reading this! The whole concept of the "girl in white" was awesome. I can really feel the emotions here, they're beautifully written. Your descriptions are simply amazing and I'm astounded by the depth you've conveyed in such short prose here.

And ghosh the ending was so heart wrenching. Why must it be sad? Why? It is not befitting for a Basilisk to cry and yet here I am almost on the verge of tears.

Really, really well written story. I'm glad I came by to read this one shot! Great job! *sneakily returns to the Chamber*

10/10!!

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #8, by The Basilisk she is your rose...

9th January 2015:
Ooh, looks like I caught this one fresh of the press. Yay! *rubs hands together* (I've read a fair few of your things, let me just say. I loved Aftermath in particular. So I know I'm in for a good time with this story.)

Oh my goodness, second person? You aced it. It was definitely an excellent choice to go with for this story, and I'm glad you ventured into the scariness that is second, haha. It's not a territory many brave.

This was so short that it left me wanting more. (In the best way possible, of course. :P ) The format of And the...your Rose. is so powerful that even in such a short piece you've brought both flow and separation between them all, better than if you'd used something like a page break. AND THEN YOU BROKE MY HEART WITH THE PAST TENSE. WHAT WAS THAT FOR? HONESTLY. YOU OWE ME A NEW HEART.

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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Review #9, by The Basilisk she is your rose...

9th January 2015:
I emerge once again, out of the pipes and into thisss review box.

Boo.

Hello there.

Your poetissm is ssimply remarkable. All these imagess created your words possesss an unparalleled beauty. You write with undeniable sstyle.

How ironic it is that it should be a crusshed windpipe that felled her rather than, say, death by petrification by yourss truly. Suffice it to say, thiss was supremely clever of you.

The repetition in this narrative creates the most ssublime effect. Particularly towards the ending. Ah, sorrow, sadness, how deliciousss. The very lasst line was esspecially ssscrumptious. Very, very good work.

What a torturously wonderful read. Until another amazing sstory of yours, perhaps. For now, I bid you a farewell as I sslyther back in to the pipess.

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review!

Lo ♥


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