Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.






Reading Reviews for Two Earthly Kingdoms
  
21 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Felpata Lupin To Anger a God

12th November 2015:
Hi Laura!
Here for our swap!

I never really know what to say when I read your stories, because your writing is just so beautiful and so powerful and poetic and stately... And this surely is no exception.

Your take on Severus' psychology is so fascinating. You really digged into the darkest depths of his soul, and it was so fascinating to read, even if a bit scary.

The Greek mithology theme also worked beautifully. It gave the story this sort of abstract and aulic dimension, makes it even more powerful and emotionally strong.

Wish I could leave a longer and more thoughtful review, but I really have nothing better to say than wonderful job, you are a real goddess of the pen.

Sorry again for the short review. And thanks so much for swapping and for the wonderful read!

Lots of love,
Chiara

Author's Response: Hey Chiara! :) Thank you so much for the swap!

Gah, thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked it - Snape is one of those characters who's so intimidating so write because he's so well-defined in canon, so I hate the idea of taking away from it, you know, or writing something which is contradictory to his character. I'd definitely agree he's a scary character, though, and very creepy, and I kinda liked playing up those aspects in this :P

Thank you - I love Greek mythology and somehow this just fitted in with Snape, and I loved writing it, so I'm so happy other people have liked the combination too! :)

Awww, thank you so much! And no worries - long reviews are hard to do and take a lot of time, and really, I'm just glad people enjoyed this! :)

Thank you so much for the wonderful review, it was so lovely to get! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #2, by nott theodore To Anger a God

18th September 2015:
Laura! ♥

Um... wow?

Seriously, I feel like I say that every time I read and review one of your stories but this time I'm just so blown away, because this is incredible, absolutely incredible. I've wanted to read this for the longest time and I'm so glad that I have, but the problem is this story is so amazing that it's the sort that has me torn between putting down my pen and never writing again and trying to ever emulate something like this, which is essentially impossible for me. It's just... wow.

I don't even know where to start in this review, and again, I know that's something that happens a lot, but... everything about this was amazing. There's just so much thought and attention to detail in this story, and everything about it was just perfect. From your choice of characters to your choice of words and allusions - I seriously can't think of anything that could have been done better in any way. This is just amazing.

Your descriptions ♥ You know already that I absolutely adore your writing and your descriptions but I feel like here you really took them to another level entirely, even better than your writing always is, and literally every single word seemed to be so carefully chosen and fit and flow so well with the story that I'm just blown away. Each word just built up this fantastic work and I don't know how you came up with this, but I'm in awe. One day I'm going to get you to teach me how on earth you have this talent for descriptions and imagery that's so unfair on the rest of us and share a little bit of it with me :P

The allusions through this - I mean, the whole story was kind of a retelling in a way I don't think I've ever seen before, and you just worked everything in so seamlessly that it's brilliant (I'm in serious need of some new adjectives for your writing. See what you're doing to me here?). It didn't even read like a story - like a fanfiction - with the structure, but the sort of saga that you'd find in mythology, with the interludes and the different parts all building up this sense of other-worldliness that made me feel like this was all happening so far away, and yet at the same time your storytelling was so compelling it felt like it was happening right now and it was the most important story I could read. I realise I'm not even making any sense right now, but I'm kind of struggling to find the words to do this piece justice in a review, so you're going to have to bear with me, I'm afraid :P

Snape as Orpheus worked so incredibly well. I hadn't even considered the possibility before of tying Snape, of all people, in with mythology - there are certain characters who really seem to fit and link in so obviously and Snape isn't one of those I'd have considered if I hadn't read this. But the way that you told his journey through life - his desperation for glory, the attempts to win his kingdoms, the lure of the underworld and the adoration for Lily, all of it - fits so well with Orpheus's figure and you told his tale so well. His life seemed so incredibly dark - the description added to that, like there was this shadow and mystery surrounding him, a strangely dark glory about him - and tragic, in a way, as though no matter what he did he had very little control over the outcomes of events, and the way that people viewed and treated him. Just so much of this worked with Snape and all of the other characters, and your characterisation of him was just fantastic. I'm not the biggest Snape fan at all, but this piece understood him and his motivations so well - you captured his personality perfectly, and it's such a great portrayal of his character, tied up in this amazing piece.

This is just a tiny thing but I also love the way that you don't mention names either, at least of the main characters. Lily is never named through the whole of the piece, in spite of that fact that Snape thinks about her so much and wants her as part of his rise to glory, and then Snape himself is only mentioned twice, I think - it's just something so small but the fact that you told this whole story without naming people like that and yet the reader still perfectly understanding who they were reading about and everything that was happening really demonstrates your skill and talent as a writer.

I have so much more to say but I don't have the words to say it right now, and I've rambled and not made sense for long enough here, unfortunately. This is such an incredible story, Laura, and lots of luck in the voting because it absolutely deserves a Dobby (and then you can teach me how to write like this, even a little bit, yes?). Good luck! ♥

Sian :)

 Report Review

Review #3, by Penelope Inkwell To Anger a God

15th September 2015:
Whew. Girl. Whoa.

I, like, need a minute. That was intense.

*1 minute elapses*

Okay. So, I'm here checking out the Dobby finalists--Whoo-hoo! Congratulations on your nomination! That's huge! And man, this story is...I feel like "story" is not the right word for this. This is a work.

I am overwhelmed. This is written gorgeously. The imagery is absolutely incredible. I'm a huge lover of mythology, so I was crazy for all those references. But man, I am seriously agog. That was incredible. How did you even write this?!

Whenever he wondered which he should choose, tracing the Dark Mark, green and bright, that symbol of hope and promised glory, he thought of his mother, of how she had thrown away her life, her birth-right, her place on Olympus, enthroned in the underworld, for the sake of a man with dirt under his nails and gravel in his voice. She had died in the end, her body rusting and weakening, her blood turned to dust, all fire and spark crushed by love. It would not be the same for him; he would not end the same way, he told himself.
--the logic you gave behind Snape's initial betrayal of Lily was wonderfully thought out. I'd never considered what it might mean to him. It was obvious that he only prized the Pureblood portion of his heritage--Half-Blood Prince and all that. But I'd never thought what it might mean for him, after seeing what happened with his mother and his father, to fall in love with a Muggleborn, himself. I could imagine that wearing on him, and I liked how you had him sort of contradict himself. He was too good for her; he was darkness and she was light; he couldn't betray himself or his blood by being with her; he was determined to have her.

The entire Lord of the Dead, Underworld element--all those references--were brilliant and fascinating and they just fit together so well. And then Dumbledore and Grindelwald being Zeus and Ganymede--another perfect fit.

pride and wormwood is a volatile combination. Separately, they fizz and sulk and distil, but together they burn, leaping and roaring with the strength of a hundred men, and in him they ignited his blood, ignited his skin and his soul and everything he was or ever had been.
--this was so great, because the metaphor worked in Snape's affinity for potions!

He had no doubt that in their mouths their tongues were heavy, poisonous and unwieldy, leaden to the core, surrounded by rotting, flaking silver.
--I just really loved that description. It was really well-written.

She was gone, though, she who could have been Persephone, married to a summer prince, all hazel and gold and yellow, and Hades slept alone in his stolen kingdom.
--and this! What a great way to end that section. It was a really powerful image.


CC:

I always try to give CC, but it was definitely hard here. These are all super minor things, but it was simply so good that only the minor things were left to me.

and he watched as she drew into herself, fading into a pale and wan replica of herself
--this might flow better if both sections of the sentence did not end with "herself".

and then the whistle was blown, the starting pistol fired, and he moved.
--this image was a little jarring, as so far all the references had been from mythology, and from the wizarding world, and these were so modern and muggle that they seemed a bit out of place in the story.


This really was phenomenal. I don't even have the words. But you more than deserve your Dobby nomination. I can't imagine the work that must have gone into this, but it was brilliant! Congratulations, again!

 Report Review

Review #4, by HeyMrsPotter To Anger a God

11th September 2015:
Hi, Laura!

I'm trying to get through the millions of dobby noms in very little time so this won't be a very long review but I didn't want to not leave one. I can totally see why this was nominated for best descriptions. Wow, wow, wow! I think you've done an incredible job of getting inside Snape's head. You wrote each stage of his life perfectly, and I liked that with each one his thoughts got a little older, it wasn't the same all the way through, I could differentiate between the petulant teen who loved Lily and hated James, and how that almost childish comment about getting the dark mark before his 'friends'. I honestly could have read on through the rest of his life right up until his death, in fact-I demand that you write it!

Congrats on the nomination!

Dee

Author's Response: Hey Dee - thank you so much for dropping by, and good luck with getting through all the Dobby noms; there are loads of them and not too much time to do it in! :P

Gah, thank you so much! I loved writing Snape, strangely enough, even though I'm not his greatest fan, because there was something fun about his mindset, you know? There's something very sinister and yeah, petulant is a good word for him, haha, about him all in general, which was so interesting to tackle :) Haha, I'm not sure about that - maybe some time, though? ;)

Thank you so much for the lovely review - it was a great surprise to get! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #5, by DraculoraMalfoy11 To Anger a God

9th June 2015:
Wow, how do I even begin to review this?

I issued the Greek Myth Challenge, to which you responded with this beautiful story. (Sorry for the lateness. I lost my list of the stories that had been entered and I had to hunt them down.)

You are a fantastic writer. Your words weave the most beautiful photos in my mind. Your use of imagery is amazing. Truly you are a writer in the best sense.

This was an amazing story. You wrote the tale of Orpheus in a way I didn't think of and it was so lovely.

Snape is the perfect character to use for Orpheus. He has the same troubles and sorrows.

I love the use of the Greek myths. The way you sprinkled references into the story was fabulous. It made the story feel very... I don't even have a word for this. I am running out of good adjectives to describe this story.

The way you described Snape's ascension to being one of the Dark Lord's favorites was stellar. The descriptions of blood and wings and power. Give me a second to consult a thesaurus for a good enough word.

Incredible. Marvelous. Fascinating. Wonderful. Stunning. Prodigious. Extraordinary. Stupendous. Breathtaking.

Should I go on?

I issued a challenged and you certainly blew my expectations to pieces.

Bravo, my dear.

-Hannah

 Report Review

Review #6, by LadyL8 To Anger a God

4th May 2015:
Hello Laura.

I'm here with the promised review. I had to do this one, because I.. ehm, Daenerys, I mean, was actually considering doing this when she left her last review. She had to choose between Infinitesimal and this one, and ultimately went for the other as that one was the newest. But since I got the chance to review you again, I'm going to do the one I couldn't do the first time around because of my tight schedule... ehm, I mean Daenerys' tight schedule. She's kind of busy, you know, with dragons and overthrowing the Lannisters and all the other drama in her very interesting life.

Anyway, I'm so in love with your writing. It's like the definition of perfection, no kidding. If I'm half the writer you are at some point in my life, I'll be in heaven. This is just... I'm speechless, because you're writing is just so inspirational. I want to be you, seriously, but in not creepy way, cause I just realised that could sound very stalker-ish. But honestly, this is probably one of the best stories I've read on HPFF.

What I admire you so much for is your description. It's so flawless, so beautiful that I want to sit down and cry over how horrible I am at it. I could just see it all happening in my head, every part of it, and that's not regular occurrence for me, I can tell you. I think it can be very difficult to find the right words to describe something, because you can see it so clearly in your own head. But you obviously don't have the same problem, because I'm blown away by the beautiful (well, technically gruesome, but it was beautiful that you could make them, if that makes any sense) scenes you created. Just... good job, Laura!

I've always found Snape to be an interesting character. He's so complex, kind of like Regina/The Evil Queen from OUAT if you've ever seen the tv series. They are both characters that are walking the thin line between good and evil, between doing what's easy and expected of you and what you really want and love. It's basically two characters that have made some poor choices in their lives, and they're still paying for them while desperately trying to redeem themselves, to be better for the people they love, because love's not always played a big part in their lives.

Interesting enough, you're comparison to the greek gods, made me see another see Snape as very similar to another character, one I'm proud to call a good friend of mine. I'm talking about Robb Stark, of course, but it could in a way just as much be Daenerys Targaryen. Robb is expected to marry someone that can help him go for the throne, help him avenge his father by overthrowing the Lannisters, while Snape is expected to join the death eaters and hate muggles and muggle-born. But Robb falls in love with Tulisa/Jeyne and ultimately goes for her instead of what he is expected to go for, and so does Snape with Lily. And it ends badly for both of them (I'm guessing you've gotten this far in the series, if not I'm terribly sorry if I'm spoiling something). I've never seen that comparison before, but that was interesting to see.

Wow. I'm still blown away by this own. And I think you did Snape so much justice. The characterisation was spot on, if you ask me. I'm so envious right now, and I'm not sure if I dare to come back to your page before I better my writing. But I probably will, because I like reading good fanfics, and you're a good writer.

I Hope you have a wonderful week!

Hugs

Lotte

 Report Review

Review #7, by tangledconstellations To Anger a God

18th March 2015:
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

This was so incredibly beautiful!!

Honestly, this was so so special to read, thank you for posting this because it was beautiful ♥ Your writing is so inspirational! It's so fluid and clear and just absolutely amazing to read. I really don't think I can enthuse enough about this right now. It was just wonderful and thought-provoking and...a million things!

I love reading about Snape. He's such an interesting character and I love your approach to him here. The stance that you've taken is such a new way to look at him. It's devoid of judgement, it's not making him into a hero. It's just so wholly central to him in a really unique way. It lets you start to imagine some of Snape's delusions, his warped, obsessive way of thinking, but at the same time it's who he is, it's how he formulates his plans. I love that here you're implying that he acts half out of desperation, out of things that he's lacking in his life and needs, like love. But at the same time there's the suggestion that he likes this, he wants to be the glimmering in gold, he wants the power. It's such an intricate and beautiful balance. I also love that you really emphasised that bitter, jealous, sort of competitive side to him, making him feel superior but at the same time vulnerable. It's the side I think that he would deny he has, and he doesn't necessarily acknowledge it here either. But it exists in his character, all the way through this piece. This is truly like seeing into his mind. The most unsettling but important quote for me was: "Luck was for lesser men, not me."

The style of the piece was just flawless too. I loved all of the references, I loved viewing this side of the story like an ancient legend, like this was an epic celestial story of the chosen heroes. They fit in so snugly, too. I think my favourite part was The Duel with Apollo. There was something so haunting about it. And having Lucius as this immaculate, overconfident figure that Severus just absolutely brings crashing to the ground was incredible. I loved that, even though once I was sort of aware of the timeline you were following here, I literally had no idea where you were going to place Severus and at which point in time we might be at, so starting each new section was so exciting. You've managed to balance the pivotal 'book bits' with parts that capture our imagination and flesh out the Death Eater aspects to Sev. I wonder what it would be like to read a contrasting one shot in a similar style to this, but dwelling on the 'light' and more 'good' (note the quotation marks!!) parts of Severus' character. It would be fascinating to see the similar reference points but twisted into a story of a sort of heroism.

I love the way you write Severus' feelings towards Lily. I love that it's ambiguous whether or not he does love her. Since reading the books, I've never been sure myself. Here, he hates her blood status so much and that's really fascinating to me, because I guess we will never know if he did or not. I've always thought that he was sort of going along with the ill-feeling of the time when calling her a mudblood, but your interpretation of him actually really resenting her for it is so charged and makes you rethink their whole relationship. It makes him that much more interesting and complex. He hates what she is yet he wants her - and for what? I was semi-expecting lots of descriptions of her beauty and her kindness but I like that here in this piece I can't find that as much. It makes me wonder whether he did love her for those things, or whether he just sort of wanted to conquer her and have her to contrast him. Ahh all the feelings right now!

Also, I am so so sorry about the delay in our review swap! I sort of volunteered the swap in a bout of uni-work procrastination and then the last two days I've felt super guilty about not doing uni work haha so have been tryna catch up. I fail so hard at being organised! But I am really sorry this has taken so long :(

Anyway, this was so gorgeous. I loved it and I love your writing times infinity! Thanks for writing this. It is so special! You never, ever disappoint!

Laura xxx

 Report Review

Review #8, by The Basilisk To Anger a God

4th March 2015:
So intersssting...

This wass a good read, full of the old mythsss. Severusss seemss so much like Hades and Lily hisss Persephone, without their "happy" ending. Persephone was just as much Hades' belonging as Severusss viewed Lily. Truly this was an excellent read.

I quite enjoyed how you used the old myths to help portray Severusss' character and show how he felt inside. Many know these old mythsss so it helped create the imagery within your wordsss.

Regulusss/Barty was such a surprise, I did not expect that little tidbit. Such potential with them.

I'm not quite as good with reviewsss as my basilisk brothersss and sistersss. Thank you for thisss excellent read.

Author's Response: Hello there, Basilisk! I'm incredibly honoured to get a review from someone as auspicious as yourself ;)

Thank you so much! I'm a big fan of Greek mythology myself, so I'm so happy (though not surprised) to see that a creature like yourself, so ancient and wise, is also a fan. I always loved the Persephone/Hades tale, so I liked the idea of including it - and Severus definitely thinks of Lily as a prize more than a person.

Thank you so much! Severus was such a hard character to write - I was so scared when I started! - but I really enjoyed finding links with mythology (though the Death Eaters had me stumped for a while!) for all the characters and ideas!

Hehe, they're everywhere on my page, I swear! Always creeping in, naughty boys :P

Awww, no, you're just as good as them! Don't let them tell you anything different! ;) :)

Thank you so much for the lovely review, dear Basilisk! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #9, by TreacleTart To Anger a God

20th February 2015:
Hi Aphoride,

I'm here for our review swap!

Where to start with this one? What a beautifully written story. I love the way that you've juxtaposed the two different worlds. I really liked that you kept Lily more of a possession to Snape. I thought his view of her really fit his calculating nature.

The way he imagines himself a God is brilliant. His perception of his own blood was fantastic and his rationalization of his own muggle blood was fascinating.

Thank you for writing such a creative, interesting story! I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: Hey there! :) Thanks so much for stopping by!

Gah, thank you - I'm so glad you liked it! It was a weird sort of amalgamation to do - I was so nervous it was going to go wrong - so I'm so happy you think it worked! I'm not much of a Snily fan, or a Snape fan actually, so I wanted to kind of show that it was a very twisted sort of love he had for her - and yeah, he's definitely very possessive.

I'm so glad you liked it! I loved tying in all the Greek mythology references, and with the way the purebloods seem to view purity, ichor was just the perfect analogy to me, haha, which then led into all the 'I am a god' stuff, and so on... he's very self-aggrandising in this, too, for sure!

Thank you so much for the lovely review - and thank you so much for the swap! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #10, by Ravenclaw333 To Anger a God

11th February 2015:
Hey Laura, here for our swap!

Everything you write blows me away, but this piece was next-level incredible. You wield language and myth and allegory with unparalleled skill and weave them into what can only be described as a masterpiece, and there are so many lines throughout this piece that took my breath away and made me stop, reread and commit it to memory. Your parallels were absolutely perfect, the continual references to Hades and Persephone contrasted with the subtle, framing motif of Orpheus and Eurydice - this was masterful, absolutely masterful, and I could write essays about this piece and the way you've characterised Snape, paralleling himself to gods and demigods and heroes and kings.

Your insight into and portrayal of the Death Eaters is, again, stunning, and this line in particular struck me: "He had no doubt that in their mouths their tongues were heavy, poisonous and unwieldy, leaden to the core, surrounded by rotting, flaking silver." This is perfect on every possible level, painting a greater picture of deception and corruption and silken lies than a thousand words of exposition ever could.

You create an image of Snape that is at once unsettling, disturbing and otherworldly - lost in his dreams of kingship and birthright, driven by entitlement and an unwavering belief in his own divinity, and yet with brief, fleeting glimmers of humanity that strike him down from an epic to a tragic hero. This entire piece is an absolute triumph and I feel privileged to have read it.

Author's Response: Hi Lisa! Thank you so much for swapping with me - I love swapping with you, so I'm so glad I could! :)

Oh my gosh, I really have no idea how I'm going to respond to this - really, none at all. This is just such an amazing review to receive, so I apologise early on in case I end up rambling about god knows what, or just repeating thank you endlessly :)

This was one of the one-shots where I'd had the idea for a while, but never any motivation to do it, so when the Greek Myth Challenge came up, I just had to enter it! Force myself to write it... and then this came out. You should know I consider you as essentially the goddess of everything ancient greek and roman, so to hear you say that is just amazing. Like, completely mindblowing. I loved working in little references - though the Death Eaters gave me a lot of trouble, I'll admit! - and all that kind of stuff, it was so much fun to do so I'm os happy you liked it and thought it worked!

Writing the Death Eaters was so much fun, though also incredibly hard because it was a very emotion-and-thought laden section, so it's the section I'm not really happy with. And I wish I could say something clever about that line, but, honestly, I barely even remember writing it, let alone how I thought of it :P But I've always loved the 'silver-tongued' idea, so maybe it came from there? I have no idea... but I'm so happy you liked it!

Snape is actually one of the characters I hate as a person, but love as a character, and I was so, so nervous about writing him. I really loved writing him from inside his own thoughts, because it meant I could move away from him being bitter and cruel and so on, and explore the why rather than the what, which was so much fun. And the Orpheus myth just made it easier, really, for me to do that.

I'm so so awed by this review, I apologise if this response is crap, but really I had no idea what to say and I love this review so much, and I love you for it! Thank you so so much, you are wonderful! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #11, by marauderfan To Anger a God

24th January 2015:
I'm here for the TGS review exchange. And wowww I'm so glad I got paired with you this month because this story is phenomenal.

Every single word in this story just feels so perfectly crafted, it's like reading a work of art rather than a story. (I'm sure I've said this to you before, too :p your writing is just SO GOOD and evocative and full of incredible imagery.) I want to quote back to you all the things I loved, but I think I'd end up quoting the entire story back to you because literally all of it was a masterpiece and I bow to your writing skills.

I loved all the allegories to Greek mythology here as well. My favourite being that of Lily as Persephone and Snape as Hades. Generally speaking though, all the references to Greek mythology were brilliant because it really reinforced this image Snape has of himself standing out so much above the others, and with him likening himself to Gods as he describes who he is relative to others, it just seems to fit so well, haha.

I also love how you wrote his completely twisted view of things and how it doesn't really have any logic to it but he's kind of rationalized it in his mind. Like how the sacred twenty-eight with their pureblood names are still lesser than he is despite his half Muggle heritage, because he holds on to the pureblood half of him, even referring to himself as "half a god" - just, the double standards are ridiculous. But they are SO Snape. I am so impressed with how you got into his head.

oooh, is that Regulus and Crouch in love? :D Never would have thought of that, but I like it. And Snape's reaction is perfect.

The way the two things Snape is passionate about are referred to as two separate kingdoms is so beautiful and I just love it. It really reinforces how mutually exclusive these two parts of his life are and how he can never have both of them. And then he loses one, then the other - it all builds up until that really poignant end as he can SEE how his thinking is so twisted. And I love the end - it's like the one place where this story intersects with The Prince's Tale (or whatever that chapter was called from DH) and really grounds it, as the rest of the story had been pretty much all in Snape's head. I didn't even realize until that very last line - the entire thing has no dialogue until that point, and that's so cool.

This was a fantastic fic Laura and I absolutely loved it!! AMAZING work. ♥

Author's Response: Hey there, Kristin! Thank you so much for stopping by! :)

Gah, thank you so so much! I apologise in advance if this response is either short or really rambly because I'm really lost for words as to how to respond. I'm just so so glad you liked it - and I'm so so flattered to hear you say that! :) Really, I'm completely blown away by this! If I knew how to do that little heart thingy on here I would! :) :)

Okay, so I adore Greek mythology beyond anything, and I've kinda been going through a phrase where Oscar Wilde and the Greek myths sort of influence everything I write, hence the weird fusion in this :P That being said, this was so much fun to do - I loved making little connections and references to mythological figures (though I got so stuck on the Death Eaters, haha). And yeah, my version of Snape is a pretty self-important kinda guy :P But I liked making him less good from his own pov, tbh, I think he was very ambitious as a child, and probably pretty confident about his own abilities, hence the arrogance.

It's one of the things I like about Snape as a character, actually - how twisted his view of things is, so I'm so glad you liked it! Yeah, it's full of double standards, and I don't think he even really realised the contradictions in what he believes - he just believes them, you know? And I'm so so happy you like him - I was terrified of writing him. Just like, actually petrified. So I'm just glad he came out okay :P

Hehe... one of my OTPs. They sneak in everywhere. I claim no responsibility :P Yeah, given Snape's background and personality I really didn't want him to react well, so... that :) And I will convert you to Regulus/Barty... eventually :P

It was one of those weird ideas, the two kingdoms thing - I'd actually just been reading Machiavelli who referred to two kingdoms: one temporal, one spiritual, so I kinda took that and just applied it to Snape :P And yeah, they're completely mutually exclusive, and he doesn't succeed with either of them. By trying to have both, he essentially loses both. It's kinda sad, in ways, I think, because he ends up with nothing. Yeah, I had to include that moment - it was such a brilliant moment in the books and so important for Snape so I really wanted to reference it in this. And it had no other dialogue mostly because I hate dialogue, not gonna lie :P *hides*

Thank you so so much for the amazing review - I loved it to pieces, and I'm so sorry for the late (possibly rubbish) response. I'm so so blown away by how nice you've been about this fic and thank you so much for everything you said! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #12, by casual_chaos To Anger a God

16th January 2015:
Hello!

So, this is my first review swap ever, yay for that! It took me ten minutes to decide what to read, because I wanted to read everything on your AP, but then my 'love' for Snape prevailed.

This one-shot was just pure perfection. You have a way with words that can rarely be seen and I just don't know how to do this story justice.

I loved the even rhythm of your narration and how perfectly you structured your sentences. For me, proper sentence structure is one of the most important parts of good prose and this was such a joy to read because it just rolled and rolled so evenly and smoothly and ah- I could gush all day about the flow of this story.

Most of the story was taking place in Snape's mind so it was great to see the little glimpses of the Marauders and Lily and other students in the school, as then the wedding scene and the fight with Malfoy and so on, because it gave us something a bit more concrete to visualise. Not that I had anything against the abstract parts of your story; as a matter of fact, I freaking loved them.

There are so many things I want to quote right now!!

This, for instance: ''Separately, they fizz and sulk and distil, but together they burn, leaping and roaring with the strength of a hundred men...''

And this amazing description of books: ''slim black ones, lime green ones the size of a new-born baby, and tiny red ones you could slip into your pocket''
(Comparing the size of a book to a new-born baby = perfection.)

I loved the descriptions of the relationship (of sorts) between Crouch and Black, and Snape's clear impatience for it. And of course, I always love seeing Death Eaters experiencing love because it gives so much more dimension to their characters, and the way you wrote it here, comparing it to light within the darkness of the Death Eaters' pit, was just brilliant.

This quote is marvellous: ''If one looked, it was visible in the way grey would meet green and thaw, how green would bloom at the sight of grey, how the boy, nymph-like and deceptively sweet, would gravitate, almost longingly, to the star, lost in his orbit long ago and forever called back without sound, without want.''

While reading this, I would sometimes just let the words go through my head without trying to make sense of them, because this story is, in fact, a celebration of words, of their magnificence and the mood they can set even in the most abstract way. And ah, the mood was so wonderfully melancholic and Snape's voice was so self-obsessed and righteous and slightly maniacal and I absolutely adored it.

And when we got to the end, and his anger diffused into this pitiful mess of hurt and hope and ''yearning for summertime: for roses and picnics and the bliss true happiness brought'' I adored it even more. Another thing I loved is the fact that the last sentence of the story was the only bit of spoken dialogue (if I recall correctly) and that the sentence he spoke was in such contrast with his proud 'I am a God, where is my throne?' soliloquies from the beginning. It just made everything so... sad. :/

I also loved your consistent usage of 'and', as in: ''glory and honour and purity''. I love superfluous usage of 'and' because it helps maintaining the flow and because it just sounds better than when a comma is used. I can't explain it, but I love it. :)

The awesome thing about fanfiction is that it enables stories like this one. Basically, what you gave us here was a recapitulation of the main events in Snape's life told through beautiful passages of poetic prose, and you didn't have to bother with explaining what happened, because we already knew and we could just enjoy your interpretation of it. And that's why I love this site so much. :)

Once again, this story is brilliant, and I truly enjoyed reading it and I'm looking forward to reading your other works. Thank you so much for the swap! :)

Andy

 Report Review

Review #13, by toomanycurls To Anger a God

11th January 2015:
Laura!!

Reading this kind of took me back to my first Spanish Lit class where I felt, after 2 read throughs on my own and another with classmates, that I'm only getting a portion of the awesome at play here. Thank goodness I don't have to discuss this with my professor who would always tut and say "You did not read this well." (which in spanish sounded more like a slam.) All of that to say,this was incredible and complicated which is perfect for a story about Snape.

I loved the discussion of Snape's birthright and his power - this stood out as a very nice reference to Greek mythology, almost like a son of the gods. What would seem like arrogance from Snape is really just his frustration at the naves he's stuck with.

His strife with regard to Lily is remarkable. I like that you showed the pull of wanting to be a good pureblood but not being able to fully ignore his desire for Lily.

Your description of Potter et al is perfect with no one knowing where one ended and the other began. The description of lily after her mom died was so tragic and sad. It's such a true statement of what it is like to carry on after a parent's death. Snape's crossroads dilemna does such a good job showing his struggle with where he wants to go with life and love. I think his mother's own fate pushed him away from going with Lily.

omg- this bit about Snape and his death eater pals laughing about James and Lily's wedding and calling it his downfall is now part of my headcanon. I love the irony of Snape being pushed further into Voldemort's ranks while Lily is uniting herself indefinitely with James.

The imagery of black feathered wings is just lovely (and is a nicer visual than we're usually given for Snape and his flowing robes). Getting the dark mark is such a loss of innocence and that comes through in such a poetic way here.

the darkness that Snape descends into is all-consuming. It felt like a dark glory for him to be there though. when it falls apart and Snape is no longer Voldemort's righthand man, I felt almost bad for him to have lost so much.

Malfoy as Apollo = the best. I get a bit of a giggle out of thinking of Snape defeating Malfoy and it also makes me think of them as frenemies afterwards.

Snape's reaction to love and tenderness fits quite well with his past struggles. I was glad that he had a touch of remorse for the future he lost.

The prophecy and Snape's reaction really resonated with me. He sees himself as warped and is also aware of is past versus current self. I like that he realizes that voldemort's potential defeat would have once brought him joy but now that he's all in for voldemort it is near terrifying. His warning to Dumbledore is even more amazing in this story as a catalyst for his own glory.

I love this and your portrayal of Snape. Only an author of your magnitude could write this with such perfect tie-ins with Greek mythology.

-Rose

 Report Review

Review #14, by Pookha To Anger a God

3rd January 2015:
Orpheus in the underworld with Snape as Orpheus and Voldy-baby as Hades. An interesting take on Snape's tale and one I thoroughly enjoyed.

The lyrical style is almost like proesie, some of the best of Baudelaire, like 'Les fleurs du mal.' It evokes a mood, which is as important to this story as the plot. Beautiful and moving.

Author's Response: Hey there - thanks so much for stopping by! :)

Yeah, I just loved the idea of Snape fitting into that role - it's an incredibly tragic role, which fits his character, even if not completely, and it meant there was a lot of space for other characters to fit into it too. I'm so glad you liked it - I know Greek Mythology isn't exactly everyone's cup of tea :P

Wow, thank you so much! I've read enough Baudelaire to know what that means, so thank you so so much! :) I really enjoying writing this, making all the connections and the links (even if it was pretty hard), so I'm so happy some of that came through :)

Thank you so much for the lovely review - it was such a great surprise! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #15, by Your Secret Santa To Anger a God

23rd December 2014:
Hello there! I'm here with the first of your presents!- and sorry for the delay in its delivery!

Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. I have always loved Greek mythology, even with how twisted and extensive it can be, and I loved how smoothly you integrated it into the story. It didn't feel out of place at all... The style, the words, everything was picked to work beautifully together.

I think my favourite aspect of this story was the parts that included Lily. I particularly loved the nod towards the myth of Hades and Persephone, as that is one of my favourite myths.

I found Snape's point of view in this story very well done. It was definitely him, and you could see his teenage arrogance, an arrogance that he still possesses (to some extent) in his later years, tainting his world view. I'd be very interested to see some of the scenes from a different perspective... I imagine that the other students in the Slytherin common room wouldn't be flinching in fear or worry as Snape mentions his plans to join the Dark Lord, or composes spells, but rather in disgust or disdain.

It was interesting to watch him twist around facts and events to suit himself. His reasoning with his blood- and the status it did, or didn't give him- was very interesting to watch. I find warped logic intriguing to puzzle out, to try and figure out the owner's mindset.

Also, I loved how you ended this story: with a simple word. It was elegant and it gave power to his plea in a way not much else could have managed. Futhermore, it was a great contrast to the detail and flow of the rest of the story. Snape was at his lowest- he could no longer think like he had before, could no longer manage those arrogant thoughts, those long metaphors and conceited manner of thinking. Instead, he was locked in his own pain and pulled down to a very simple level. It was very well done. :)

All in all, I very much enjoyed this one-shot! I thought that it was very well done, very well-written, and quite enjoyable to read. :)

Happy holidays!

Your Secret Santa

Author's Response: Hi there, Secret Santa! :) Thank you so much for stopping by - it's so great to get a gift at all, so no worries about the delay in time - I completely understand how RL can just eat you up! ;)

Gah, thank you so much! I'm a huge Greek mythology fan too, so when a Greek Myth challenge came up on the forums, I just had to enter and for some reason Orpheus was stuck in my head, and well, this came out :P Some bits were definitely a lot harder to work in - the Death Eaters gave me so much trouble, in particular!

I love it too! :D SO I just had to include it, and, tbh, not being a massive fan of Snape, I think it's a reasonably good analogy for their relationship, or how he wanted their relationship to go.

Thank you! I was so terrified of writing Snape before I started this - even when I started it! He's such a complex character, and one so many people love, so I really wanted to get him right - so I'm so glad yo think it worked! I loved writing him as an unreliable narrator, too - the arrogance was so fun to play with. And yeah, I don't think the others see him quite as he thinks they do, for sure! :P

I really, really wanted to think about his own blood status in relation to the Death Eaters' views because I think it's something which often gets overlooked in Snape's case. It's incredibly warped logic, definitely, but I think it kinda suits him, and what we know about his history in a way...

I'm really bad at dialogue - I find it so hard to do, haha, so I tend to avoid it as much as possible, so yeah, one word of dialogue at the end :P (Part of why it was only one word was also because I didn't have the books with me to be able to check for the exact quote from the books :P) It's definitely a big contrast to the beginning, and I liked the idea of it being almost cyclical, in the sense that he always wants to go up, does, and then comes back down again.

Thank you so so much for the wonderful review - it was such a lovely gift to receive! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #16, by bittersweetflames To Anger a God

23rd December 2014:
Hi, Laura. First off, thank you so much for the swap! I'm so sorry this took so long for me to review but I actually read this one-shot twice! I am just in awe of the writing, omg. So, yeah, rereading it afforded me the ability to actually attempt coherence in this review. hahaha

So, first off, I LOVE SNAPE. Even when he was mean and nasty and seemingly evil, I have always LOVED him. The way you write him here is just mind-blowing. I have so many favorite lines, so many favorite scenes I simply cannot pick one! I do remember this though - "he still dreamed about her at night, with her red hair and green eyes and the soft, happy smile she so often wore even then, and he thought of a thousand different ways he could apologise, a thousand different ways he could try to make it up to her" because I am not a Snily fan and I want to tell Severus to not even bother asking for Lily's forgiveness and they just don't deserve one another (Yes, I hate Lily because of this. What does this make me, I wonder? Maybe not a Gryffindor fan.)

Anyway, you fueled my Snape love. The way you went inside his psyche... The reasons he joined the Death Eaters, the reasons he was who he was (flawed, human, instrinsically good, complex) Okay, well, I'm just fangirling now because it's Snape and you wrote him so well. (Even if it is a Snily.haha)

So, now for the references! My head was spinning around, Laura (ok, maybe not because that would be scareh). Because everything was just so well-integrated. I am a HUGE fan of yours and your writing and this one shot just blew me away. Like, I love love Greek mythology so the way you just used it in your one-shot nearly made me cry, lord, it was so beautiful.

OK, that's about it. I said I would try to be coherent -looks up- and I totally failed that ask. HAHA. Oh well. I loved this, Laura. Not just because of the fact that it's Snape but because it's so perfectly written and such an interesting way of writing about him and his POV of his life. Thanks for sharing (and for the swap)

--Carla

Author's Response: Hi Carla! :) Thanks so much for the swap - I always love swapping with you; it's so much fun! :)

I have to be honest, I'm really not much of a Snape fan :P At least, not when considering him as a person, as opposed to as a character... but I love how complex he is and how difficult he is to pin down, you know? There's something amazing about how real he is... even if he is a massive jerk :P I'm not a Snily fan either, haha, but I don't think it's really possible to write a Snape fic as long as this one, including his teenage years, without including Lily in some way, and considering his love for her. Even if it is kinda creepy and unhealthy... :P

I'm so glad you liked him, though! I was terrified of writing him, because he seemed like the kind of character it's easy to get wrong, and adding the mythology in... I really didn't want to mess it up, especially because it was a present for a friend :) Eh, it's not quite a Snily - it's a very one-sided type of love, I think, but yeah, exploring his flaws and human moments were so much fun to do!

The references - oh my god, some of them were so hard to get. Like, working out who the Death Eaters could be was so, so hard and took me so long, and I ended up making a few plays on names which are more roman references, I think, but still... I'm so glad you like them - I love Greek mythology too, so the idea of including it was so much fun, but the idea of getting something wrong, and something not quite working was nerve-wracking.

I'm so so happy you liked it, and I'm completely blown away by this review and all the lovely compliments in it. This was just amazing to get, and I'm so sorry for the long wait for a response, but I really struggled to come up with coherent response for so long! Thank you so much for the review! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #17, by TheHeirOfSlytherin To Anger a God

23rd December 2014:
Wow...

This may be my shortest review ever, I honestly don't know what else to say. Though, awe comes to mind. I'm just sitting and staring at my iPad, mind blank as I attempt to write words that might appropriately show the intense amount of love I have for this one-shot. I got nothing, but I'm gonna try...

Snape. God, I'm so jealous. I suck at writing Snape and here you are, writing him so freaking perfectly. The whole thing was just brilliant, I was so sad when it was over. I NEED TO KNOW ALL THE THINGS!!! The way he views the rest of the world, complete with Greek myth references (*insert fangirl Sam here* - seriously, ask Isobel :P), gah, it was just perfect.

Do I detect Regulus/Crouch? *lover of all things Regulus... and slash... and Regulus* Seriously, just the fact that Regulus was in this at all made me the happiest person ever. And the reference or two of James *is a total James/Regulus shipper... separate topic*

The end! It's Snape asking Dumbledore for help? Although it could be anything really and I'd still consider it a tengible being, hold it close and never let go. NEVER. ITS NOT OVER NOW!!!

Honestly, this was just the most wonder thing ever and I'm totally fangirling and repeating myself and flailing around like an idiot, but I don't care. *runs away to read it again*

Sam.

Author's Response: Hi there, Sam! :) Thank you so so much for stopping by! :)

Omigosh... okay, I should probably try to find words to respond to this rather than grinning like an idiot and flailing :P But, anyway, thank you so so much - you're waaay too kind to me! :)

I was so terrified when I started writing this. I swear to god, I'd never ever even thought of writing Snape if Snape/Lily and James/Lily hadn't been Isobel's favourite pairings and I hadn't got a plunny I liked... I'd tell you if I could, but I have no idea... god, Snape still scares me, haha. But thank you, I'm so glad you liked my weird version of Snape! :)

Mahaha, yep, definitely! They're one of the little, unknown pairings I love, so they end up finding their way into everything... I love writing Regulus, too, so it was so easy to sneak him in :P James! You know, James was actually meant to be in this more than he ended up being... weird story, but there you go :P (And James/Regulus is an interesting ship... hm... I could see that happening...)

Yeah, I couldn't resist including that scene! :P Plus it meant I could look at it from Snape's perspective, rather than Harry's, and explore more why he did it, rather than what he did... and awww, but no, it's totally over, sorry! :P

Gah, thank you so so much for this - this review completely made my day! It was the most wonderful surprise to get, I really didn't expect anything, and all the compliments were just amazing, so thank you so much! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #18, by Red_headed_juliet To Anger a God

14th December 2014:
This is wonderful! I believe my favorite quote would be:

"Then, at last, they were all there, anointed with blood and sworn to fervour, cloaks of ambition and promised power about their shoulders, and he looked down the line and could only see rivals, not friends any longer.

When the prize is immortality, there is no room for mercy"

I love how you managed to describe them emotionally and physically all at once. I also quite enjoyed the part with 'smoke' coming out of people when they would speak. It was so vibrant I could see the thick plums enveloping him. The entire piece has such a wonderful flow to it. Each thing moving seamlessly into the next.

Also, Holy metaphors Batman! You managed to stack those on top of one another without detracting from the storytelling at all! Nothing was confusing or overdone and everything had its purpose.

I enjoyed the internal struggle you set up in Snape, and the way it played out. The whole 'two kingdoms' thing really puts it into perspective. This was a refreshing delve into his mind. I feel like your portrayal puts the right amount of responsibility on his shoulders. You explore what he wanted, the wrong choices he made, and even explore deliberation, which is always nice to see.

This piece in particular makes me fall in love with words again. Your vocabulary, syntax, and mood are a force to be reckoned with. I enjoyed it whole-heartedly.

The piece is simply beautiful. 10/10

Oh, and this was brought to you by the B v B. +]

Until next time!

Author's Response: Hey there! Thank you so much for stopping by! :)

You know, it actually took me a couple of tries to get that quote to say what I wanted it to say :P Still, I was happy with it in the end, so I'm so glad you like it! :)

I love all the metaphors in this - it was for the Greek Mythology challenge, so I kinda went a bit mad with all the metaphors, haha. Describing all the characters with mythological counterparts was so much fun too - Apollo and nymphs and everything :P

I'm so glad they worked and it wasn't confusing - I was so nervous when I wrote this that it just wouldn't make sense at all, so it's so amazing to hear you say that! :)

I'm so happy you like Snape! I was so scared of writing him - he's such an intimidating character, you know - I mean, he's Snape! I really wanted to give him responsibility and not let him off simply because maybe he made some wrong choices, but not forget at the same time that, in the end, he still tried, in a way, even if not for the right reason, to do the right thing. He's such a complicated character - he was so hard to write!

Gah, thank you so much - all those compliments are way more than I deserve, and so amazing to get from you! Thank you so so much for the review! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #19, by MargaretLane To Anger a God

13th December 2014:
This does sound intriguing.

I like the way you portray Snape. There's something ominous about him here, something determined. I especially like the comment about his father's "tainted, smoky blood."

Oooh, and I like the conflict between his disdain for Lily because she's Muggleborn and his love for her. So many stories gloss over the fact he was part of an organisation dedicated to eliminating people like her.

Really like the way he sees himself as half a god.

Yikes, that part about him claiming back his birthright is ominous. I wonder what he is planning to do. It sounds scary, like he's going to do something dodgy.

I like the way the war is starting to effect everybody.

And poor Lily and James - it seems like within the space of about 2-4 years, they lost all four of their parents, took part in a war and were targeted by Voldemort. Nobody deserves that.

And OH! that makes so much sense - that he would see a similarity between his mother's marrying a Muggle who turned out to be less than satisfactory and the possibility of his dating a Muggleborn.

Oooh, that part about the Death Mark burning into his skin is stark. You can almost imagine it happening.

Hmm, it makes sense he'd feel that being half blood is going against him. And it does help to explain why he would do something so evil.

I really like the imagery of this story. It's so dark and ominous and shows how Snape is being corrupted.

And that whole thing about how he knows he cannot depend on the Dark Lord's word - it makes a lot of sense.

Love the reference to how he cannot see much difference between hope and despair.

Author's Response: Hey there! Thanks so much for the swap! :)

Thank you so much! I was so nervous about writing Snape, because he's such a big, terrifying and divisive figure. People either seem to love him or hate him, and I've never been his biggest fan so taking him on was something I'd never imagined myself doing. I'm so glad you like him! :) I know, I really wanted to bring to the forefront that he's not just misguided, he's ambitious about his misguidedness, if that makes sense. He wants power, and he thinks he knows how to get it; it's not just that he wandered into the snake pit and couldn't get out :P

The birthright thing came out of the whole 'Half-blood Prince' thing, and the way that seemed to be so important to him when he was a teenager, and something that perhaps he used as a shield or weapon against others in the common room and things :)

Yeah, I'm so glad you like the inclusion of the war - it was surprisingly hard to write - but I wanted to include enough of it that it seemed harsh and difficult, give some reality to a story which is barely grounded in reality, haha. Lily and James definitely have a pretty bad lot in this, and you're absolutely right that no one deserves that! :(

I'm so happy you picked up on that! :D I really wanted to make the connection, because it's the kind of rhetoric he'd have picked up - and he seemingly did pick up in canon - from the purebloods around him, and I thought it was an interesting thing to explore with Snape... the conflict it creates :)

Yeah, he really is being corrupted, but I think as well that he's almost happy to be corrupted - like, he wants to be there, he wants to be better and that means worse, in some ways, and more corrupted, and so he's trying to become more corrupted and darker. Hence the reference to hope and despair - they're both sort of intangible things, things you can't help, really, and both things he has disdain for, in a way :)

The Dark Lord... I always wondered, tbh, why he warned Dumbledore, so this was my sort of attempt to find a reason why, when the Dark Lord had already promised to spare Lily, and that was what I came up with :)

Thank you so much for both the swap and the lovely review - both were so great! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review

Review #20, by maraudertimes To Anger a God

12th December 2014:
Hi! Review swap!

Let me start out by saying that Snape is one of my least favourite people in the HP series, but one of my most favourite characters, all because of the layers upon layers of his personality and the complexity of his characterization, but lets be honest, he was a bully to Neville and other kids and he will never be redeemed in my eyes. Also I'm a hardcore Jily shipper because canon = *heart*

All that said - THIS WAS FREAKING AMAZING!!! And yes, there are three exclamation points because it deserves three exclamation points!!! I said I don't like Snape as a person, and your writing makes me dislike him more, but I mean that in the best way. You've written something from his perspective, weaseled your way into a closed off mind and exposed it for all to see, all the dirty secrets and awful thoughts, and you did so in such a beautiful and artistic way what with your interludes and the i, ii, and iiis.

I don't like Snape/Lily. I find it obsessive and I'm pretty into canon. But I love your version of it. To me it speaks of longing, wanting, craving of human emotion that he must not have gotten when he was younger and still cannot receive. (Awks, I've begun talking all smart-like because of your story :P) You wrote their (I hesitate to call it a) relationship exceptionally well and I loved it!

Snape's thoughts about how ash and fire in blood and his need for ascent to the throne, his views on him becoming a Hades type, with Lily becoming Persephone but instead she married a man of summer, his longing for Olympus, was very much a Hades kind of thing, and I liked this little tie-in to the Greek mythology. It made sense, heightened the experience, and overall was amazingly well-written!

I can't really pinpoint my exact favourite lines or my favourite parts because everything was so exquisitely written and amazingly well done. This was quite a long story but I was entranced the whole way through. You did an amazing job on this and I'm so happy I got to read this!

Absolutely stellar job!
Lo :)

 Report Review

Review #21, by ShatteredStarlight To Anger a God

11th December 2014:
Hello!
I have no idea how you managed to write such a beautiful story here but you did. Wow. I don't generally like Snape fictions, but I adored this one. It was darkly beautiful, and you have so much emotion packed into this short story. It was truly amazing. Your style and flow of writing was perfect, and such a pleasure to read.
Thank you very much for writing this!
~ Bronte

Author's Response: Hey there - thanks so much for stopping by! :)

I'm so glad you liked it - I was so, so nervous about posting this, because it's a bit weird, haha :P I'm not much of a Snape fan either, which was partly why this was so hard for me to write - so it really does mean to much that you liked it :)

Thank you so so much for all the wonderful compliments, and also for the review! It was so lovely a surprise to get! :)

Aph xx


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login