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Reading Reviews for Your Life, Your Love
  
12 Reviews Found

Review #1, by The Melodramatic Muggle Sink or Swim

30th May 2015:
-pokes-

Hey there again, Joseph.
How are you today?


You're good? Oh, well, that's nice to know..

Myself?

Well, I'm… NOT GOOD. Absolutely not good.

I melted as I was reading this fic, Joey. Absolutely melting. If you slip on something that's probably the remnants of my fragile emotions. -sigh-
Albus, well, Albus is my favorite Potter. (I know, I know. It's called 'Harry Potter') but that is the truth, the whole truth and simply the truth.

The entire story, which is less than one thousand words spans an entire lifetime told in very simple snippets. I think this was very well done. -sigh-
That's what your story does, Joey. It makes people sigh. I have to be honest.. I read through the entire thing 3 times. Because I read it so fast the first few times, the emotion hit me so hard that the entire thing really did confuse me a little. It's not that I didn't like it because I did. It just touched me so deeply that I felt it rather than really understanding it.

When I would look at your stories you would mention the YLYL universe and I would stop and think.. huh? What's YLYL? Then I read this story, saw the title. Stopped to think a few moments then I finally got it! As a starting point of a universe, this was perfect and I really did absolutely enjoy it.

The way that you managed to actually write the entirety of their life like this is beautiful. The entire thing read like a poem as it was so beautiful and lyrical. And, like a poem, it can be read in so many different ways and manners that each person can read and see parts of their own life in it. That's your strength; that's the beauty of your writing.

I really enjoyed it and I will make sure to tell all my Muggle friends that even though they don't really understand the world of magic I am sure they will understand the world of emotions that you have created.

--The Melodramatic Muggle

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Review #2, by Roisin Sink or Swim

10th March 2015:
I am SO VERY CONFUSED RN. Didn't I review this ages ago? If so, I am not finding it!

First off, I really loved the opening line. You came up with so many really fresh and interesting phrases for someone professing their love! It's amazing that you managed to do such a tender piece, and also one that features so much romance and FEELS, and completely avoid being saccharine or cliche. Also, I'm super into Albus being a writer/poet! (I misremembered this as James, which is part of why James is a writer in SiS).

And just, GAH IT'S SO SAD. But like, it's not like "I wanna cry" sad. Or, somehow it's kind of OK. Like, they had a good life, death happens. I dunno, I felt very... content? at the end. It felt like a whole life had just happened, which is CRAZY, because it's such a short piece. Would it make sense to say it's cathartic?

Oh, and I loved "Merlin knows there’s plenty one could do to speed it up." That was super duper clever. Oh, and "Some would call this stealing, but that implies I wanted it back" kind of KILLED ME.

Anyway, I very very confused as to why I haven't reviewed this yet, because I love this story. There are so many excellent turns of phrase, and it's absolutely dense with feeling.

BRAVO.

Author's Response: I could have sworn that you did?? But maybe we just talked about it and I remembered that as a review.

This story is kind of an anomaly because it's one of my only fics that I did absolutely no planning for at all. I just knew it was an Al/OC and started writing. I really wanted this to stray away from the saccharine because it's a lament and I feel like if all you can say after your wife has passed away is an endless string of cliches then you might as well just not bother putting it in print. (Of course Al didn't actually write this, but I was him in spirit)

Albus being a poet was, at first, just an excuse to write a poem through him, but eventually become something I really liked. It's funny that you mention James because his career in this universe is an interesting one as well. I'm in the process of writing about him right now and it is FUN.

Saying that you felt like a whole life had just happened pretty much made my day. I can't believe that you said that because it's like 700 words!! Cathartic is very good because that's exactly what an elegy is supposed to be!

Those two lines literally could not have been written in any of my other stories. It's funny that you choose those because they're such good examples of how his ultra specific voice completely took over this fic. His voice here was so strongly imprinted in my mind that I had trouble writing him as a twenty-something person because I realized he wouldn't speak the same.

Thank you so much, this review was a really awesome surprise! :D


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Review #3, by pointless_proclamations Sink or Swim

13th January 2015:
Joseph,

I'm pretty sure that human liquification can be achieved just by reading this work of art here. See, this story radiates high levels of sweetness and tenderness. Crazy things happen on the cellular level that are just beyond my abilities to explain and, voila, the human body reaches melting point and subsequently goes from solid form to liquid form. It's unnatural.

This is definitely one of the most poetic and lyrical pieces I have read. Ever.

It's a goldmine of quotable quotes. 'You were the memories of better days, standing right before me,'You’ve become the paradigm of pure and utter perfection,' '. . . frozen within my thoughts, as if caught in amber. . . immortalized through my recollection,' 'I gave you my heart on an ornate platter,' 'Some would call this stealing, but that implies I wanted it back,' and this one twice that I will, from now on, refer to as THE DESTROYER: 'And now all I can do is recount the moment.'

It's absolutely beautiful.

The plot induces unnatural cardiac reactions. Hypothetically speaking, the heart is probably where the human liquification begins. I believe this particular infliction is termed FEELZ and although it is a highly controversial infliction and scientists have yet to completely prove it and symptoms are varied, after one reads this awesomeness you call your writing, one is undeniably infected with DA FEELZ. Sure symptoms in this particular case include, but are not limited to, the sudden inclination to sigh with high frequencies, suffer from intense confusion regarding emotional exhibition stemming from the high displacement of said emotions, and, again, human liquification.

And I suppose that that's just my way of saying WHAT IN THE WORLD HAVE YOU DONE?!

Joseph, this was painfully beautiful, dreadfully heart-warming, and wonderfully heart-breaking. You know, nasty stuff. Extremely dangerous. :P

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Review #4, by Maelody Sink or Swim

12th January 2015:
I think this one was pretty sweet all the way round.

My favorite love stories on the archives are the ones that explain a whole lifetime together without actually being written out to the fullest. It's much simpler, and it catches the moments that matter most. I also like how little details are just randomly dispersed throughout the story. Like who we're reading about. Albus. Faith. And, unless I'm severely mistaken, the mother's/wife's name is Destiny. I also like that it very honestly goes into that of a mixed relationship. Those are slim round this parts.

I like that they're writers. More specifically novel and poetic writers, rather than writers for the Prophet. Some wizarding careers go unexplored, and seeing the nontraditional side of careers being explored makes me happy. Especially when Faith goes in to the music career!

I think my favorite bit was when Albus goes on to explain death. Not only does it make me want to shed a tear that he has lost his love, but it also goes to show just how truly poetic he really was. The whole story is simply poetic, but I think the end sums it up best.

Can I just say that I think it's absolutely adorable that he stood outside of her flat and sang very off-key? First off, it makes you realize Faith didn't get her talent from her dad ;), and secondly, it reminds me of those old 80's movies that are just so cheesy, it's adorable. Albus being in the wizarding world and thinking of Muggle 80's just makes so much sense!

So, just in case you haven't grown tired of being told so yet, I think you're a truly amazing author. All of your stories have captivated me completely, and you have such a way with words that I'm absolutely envious! Seriously! I feel like your writing comes as smooth as butter to you :p. Anyway, I'm so happy you're in the hot seat/my reviewing buddy this week/month because I've been wanting to read your stories for quite some time now. I have a list though, and everything was supposed to go in order, but the events in the pit just wanted to make it so I had to skip a few things on that list! I can't say I'm disappointed! ;)

Great job! As always!

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Review #5, by MadiMalfoy Sink or Swim

6th January 2015:
Hi Joey! :)

This is right up my alley because it's got obscure characters (I consider next gen relatively obscure because we're given hardly any canonical information about them) and angst! I will say, I usually don't read stories that are formatted like this (perhaps it's just because I love long stories) but I really enjoyed this piece and it made me sad at the same time! Such a sorrowful yet beautiful love story you created here, I could empathize with Albus at the end. My only question is whether or not Destiny died or divorced him. From the tone and progression of time through the story, I want to go with she died because that makes slightly more sense. Either way, it's a heartbreaking end and wrenches your gut when you realize Albus only has himself to relive his memories with now.

A truly magnificent piece, Joey! Thanks for doing the swap! :)
~MadiMalfoy x

Author's Response: Hi there! (let's pretend this response isn't horribly late)

I'm glad you took the time to read this even though one-shots aren't your thing! I'm so glad you liked this, I had a lot of fun writing it! I'd say that Destiny died, just because this reads more like a celebration of her life than someone who has just been dumped by their wife. I did leave it ambiguous purposefully though.

Thank you so much for the review!


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Review #6, by mymischiefmanaged Sink or Swim

20th December 2014:
Hi Joey!

I didn't see this until today, and I'm so glad I found it because it's beautiful. I'm always so impressed by how differently you write from story to story. This is a new tone and I like it a lot.

Hmm, second person. I'm often not a fan, to be honest. I know it can be effective and offers an interesting angle on a story, but I find that I get tired of it quickly. Not here. This story's just the right length to make it work, and it adds a depth to Albus's words that wouldn't otherwise be there, so good choice :)

I don't know if it was deliberate, but I like that you didn't say Destiny's name until later on in the story. It kept the feel of the writing more genuine, as if it really is just his train of thought, and it didn't need to be said any sooner than you said it.

You get through a whole relationship in such a short space of time, and it's incredibly impressive. Also I absolutely adore the fact that you've made them both writers. It means his flowery words don't seem out of character, and just makes the relationship more original somehow.

Okay, that's all I can think to say right now, even though you deserve a much much longer review than this. Well done, I loved reading this.

Lots of love,

Emma xx

ps- I had slightly ulterior motives for looking at your page. I was reading back through reviews I'd left to see author responses and came across one I left you for 'Two Words', in which I somehow mistyped 'effective' as 'affectionate'. Not sure what happened there, but I wanted to let you know it was a mistake rather than me weirdly describing your hauntingly tragic confrontation between Draco and Lucius as 'affectionate' xx

Author's Response: Hi Emma!

I totally know what you mean about how I never really write the same between stories. I'm really still feeling around, trying to find a style. I've never been much of a prose writer honestly. Not that I'm terrible at it, I'm just not a natural. This is actually a lot more like my natural writing style because it's written as poetry. So happy to see you call it beautiful!

Okay, funny story--I didn't realize I was writing this in second person until I finished it. Like, I got the idea and started writing and this is just what happened. I thought I'd be terrified of writing this point of view, but apparently not when I'm totally in character as Albus!!

I wasn't going to name Destiny at all, until I came up with her name mid-story and just wrote it in because I felt it had thematic importance. So, it's not that I wrote it as if it were a train of thought, it really was a train of thought haha.

I think wishful thinking about my own life lead to me writing a story about two writers getting married honestly. I just know that non-writers do NOT understand when I lock myself in my room in order to work on a chapter/poem/song that I've put off for months and I wanted Al to be with someone who would :)

I never mention typos in review responses because I know the feeling of "OH NO I MISPELLED THAT AND I CAN'T DELETE IT AND START OVER" but there is just something to be said about coming all this way to explain a mistake and then accidentally saying Draco and Lucius, rather than Draco and Scorpius. :P That was one of the most endearing things ever and I adore you and your reviews, typos and all! :D


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Review #7, by marauderfan Sink or Swim

15th November 2014:
Hi Joey! Here with your review!

You wanted my opinion of the poetry/prose style in this. Here is my opinion, simply put: I LOVE IT.

Since that wouldn't be a very useful review I'll expand on that, haha. I think the poetry aspect of it works so well as the piece comes off as a loving tribute to Destiny after she has died. (Not to mention that Albus is a poet in this piece as well!) It's just such a beautiful amalgamation of memories of her.

Your word choice throughout it GORGEOUS, but I just love this: those precious moments in time, frozen within my thoughts, as if caught in amber. -- WOW, it's really such an amazing description as it's so visual, and I really love metaphors with nature because nature has its own distinct kind of poetry. It's very artistic and I love that, especially in short pieces like this.

Wait, more beautiful quotes: You took care of it until I forgot I ever had it to myself. Some would call this stealing, but that implies I wanted it back. -- GUHH I JUST CAN'T. ♥

Aside from the poetic/prose mixture, I really like the format of microfiction (I think I told you in your last microfiction story I reviewed) - it's such a cool style and only lets you focus on specific things, and I love the particular memories and feelings you chose to point out in this story. In only 893 words I have a good sense of what their life was like, and how even though they might have been through some hard times financially, their love and zest for life kept them happy until the end.

To keep myself from just quoting the whole fic back to you and telling you repeatedly how amazing it is, I'll skip ahead to the CC: I have none. Sorry that's not helpful, but this is really just a beautiful fic :D Thanks for requesting it!

Author's Response: Hi Kristin!

I'm so happy that you loved this!! I really wanted this whole story to exist as a sort of tribute to her. I have a whole lot of headcanon of her and built up this entire person for him to love. When I first got the idea for this, one of my first thoughts was that Al had to be a poet. And then, I started writing without much of a plan and it started reading like poetry and I basically just said 'Oh well he's supposed to be a poet anyway!!'

Thank you!! I basically wrote this in one sitting and I was just indulging in all of these metaphors that I typically wouldn't write down, so I'm super glad that line worked. I love to describe things through nature. So many people remind me of occurrences in nature, actually. I am constantly making those kinds of connections.

I'm so relieved that you liked my heart metaphors because I was really allowing myself to splurge on them. I wasn't sure if I picked the right words to communicate what I wanted to say or anything.

I really like Microfiction too because it allows me to zero on the most important words that I have to say. I never find myself writing in circles within this style because I just don't have the wordcount with which to!

This is really a wonderful review. I love no CC! That always works for me! You've definitely convinced me to write my spin-off of this story that I have semi-planned. I'm always reluctant to follow up on a story without too many reviews, but I just remembered that *I* like this story and that should be what matters. Thank you so much for this review, you're so kind!


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Review #8, by Moonyxluna Sink or Swim

28th October 2014:
Hey Joey! Here with your requested review!

But how do I even start reviewing this!? You take their story and put such a poetic flow to it that it gives this wonderful vision of their whole life, all wrapped up in 800 words.

Your word dictation is flawless. Every sentence flowed so perfectly through their story; this was so absolutley wonderful I just want to sit and read it again.

I love the characterization we get of Albus here. He seems so humble, just talking about how Destiny came in and took over his heart and his life, and how perfectly okay he was with that.

I have absolutley no CC for you. (I looked.) Really, this was lovely.

(Ah this review is so short.) I wish I could be of more help to you, but honestly this was so wonderful. Thanks for requesting it, and keep up the brilliant work!

Julie

Author's Response: Hi Julie!

I'm so happy that you liked this so much! I was writing the intro paragraph to this story and I just got kind of caught up in it and it started writing a lot like poetry. And then I was like, OH WELL HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE A POET ANYWAY. It's MicroFiction, so I decided that I'd briefly visit each of the important times in their relationship, in order to use the brevity as an actual device.

I'm so excited that the diction was good because I wrote this all the way through and didn't really make any big changes looking back over it. These are basically the first words that came to mind. The flow is extremely important to this because I added in a whole lotta meter. I wanted it to have a slight rhythm and I also may have added in a few instances of rhyme by accident as well.

I would definitely say that Albus was humbled by Destiny. I'm glad that the relationship was portrayed well since that makes the ending hold a bit more resonance.

I love no CC haha. You've given me a lot more confidence in this story. Thank you for this wonderful review!


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Review #9, by Unicorn_Charm Sink or Swim

14th October 2014:
Hiya!

Once again, your writing has left me feeling a thousand emotions at once! I don't know how you do it in so little words. It's truly remarkable!

I loved seeing how Al didn't use his father to his advantage in his professional life, or his love life. That bit about him signing horribly, outside of her flat, was so sweet and funny. :) The fact that they were both writers was very romantic. And I adore the name they gave their daughter. Faith is such a beautiful name.

I'm astounded that you were able to catalogue their lives in just over 800 words. I really felt like I was watching the whole thing play before my eyes. I could almost see them growing older together, becoming successful together, raising a daughter together and everything. Your talent blows my mind.

Did Destiny pass away, or did she leave him? Either way, it was a heartbreaking ending. I took it as she passed away and he was remembering their life together. :(

This was a beautiful piece of writing. I love your work so much, you never disappoint. Absolutely, wonderfully done!

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: I've taken so long to respond to this, wow. NaNo has actually consumed me.

I'm so happy that I got you feeling all of these emotions because that's always my goal! I have this really developed idea of what Al in this story is like and he's certainly not the kind of guy to use his father's fame to his own advantage. Also, I agree, Faith is a really beautiful name.

When you compliment me like this, it really means so much because I honestly don't see myself as a Great Writer or anything. I'm just trying my hardest and learning with each story and any sign that I'm improving is so great. Every review makes me feel so much better about these little stories haha.

In my mind, Destiny passed away. Although, I suppose that could be left to the imagination just as well.

Thank you so much Meg, this review meant a lot!


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Review #10, by AdinaPuff Sink or Swim

13th October 2014:
JOEY OH MY GOSH

I'm crying. Thank you so much for writing this for me! This was so thoughtful-I've never had anything written for me before. Im so grateful.

This was beautifully written. You described their lives in an amazing way, Albus telling Destiny everything about them: meeting, falling in love, Faith, growing old. It was so captivating and the perfect mix of angst and fluff. You left me with a little bit of every feeling. I am in awe. Thank you so so much!

-Leigh

Author's Response: Leigh!

I'm so glad I surprised you! This review swap was perfectly timed. I really tried to write something you'd like, I am really happy I pulled it off.

And because I can't ever resist, there's a sequel to this planned right now that I hope you will like as well.

Anyway, you totally deserved this! Thanks for being awesome all the time, you're the best!


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Review #11, by Chazzie Sink or Swim

13th October 2014:
Hi Joey!
That is a really beautiful piece of writing. I think it really comes across with the voice of your Albus. He is a poet, and his voice speaks in the way I would imagine his poetry to. You have created an entire story in so few words (I gather that is the point of it being MicroFiction) but I find it really impressive. Faith is a really cute name for his daughter, and it is very sweet given it links in with Destiny's name. I'm going to completely spoil things now though and say that when I thought 'Faith Potter' I though it with Moody's voice, with a spiel about why faith was one of the only things that people have to get them through tough times. He's limping round my head now, yelling 'Constant Vigilance!'
Anyway. Al was really sweet, especially singing Destiny's favourite song to her when he is tone deaf and everyone in her flat would surely hear him. :')
I really loved it! Big congratulations,
Lottie

Author's Response: Hey Lottie!

I'm SO happy that Albus' voice as a poet comes across. I really wanted it to be believable that this is someone who does have a way with words. I just kind of let myself loose and hoped that would translate somehow.

I love MicroFiction because it enables me to write these characters and basically get them out of my system in so few words. It's like "get in, tell a story, leave asap." It's a really good exercise because you end up only putting in the things that really matter.

Haha the link to Moody is hilarious, even if unintended! I'm so glad you liked it so much, thank you for the swap!


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Review #12, by Ribbons Sink or Swim

13th October 2014:
WOW!

When it comes to beautiful word choice, you just blow everyone else out of the water, don't you? I was scanning the 'Got a New Story' thread in the forums, jumped to the last page and then found this.

Snagged the first review, too.

I'm actually entered into this challenge as well, so this is a bit weird, but it's also incredible because you've done something very different than I did with mine. Neat to see how diverse the results of a prompt like this can be.

HOWEVER, there are some similarities, namely, the wonderful rhythm that you have going on. Even when reading it in my head I could feel the pacing, like the rocking of a cradle or a rocking chair(symbolism symbolism symbolism). Just think what it would be like when I read it aloud.

I've admired you for jumping into everything and being almost everywhere at once, with the threads and beta-reading and writing and everything, but you earned another dollop of respect with your impeccable writing.

If I can write as well as you by the time I'm ancient, it'll be a miracle.

FLUFF? This was so sad...I felt those inner tears by the end of it. No full out crying - gosh that would be freaky - but still very moving. For a one-shot, that's an excellent place to stand.

My favorite bit was probably when he met her in the pub/when he was singing love songs. Oh Albus. You will forever have a place in my heart.

So sweet.

Anyway, this review is getting a bit too bizarre for my taste so I suspect I'll snip it off here, but I would like to bestow upon you a few parting words:

This was a wonderful thing to read on a Monday evening and I am forever grateful.

Much, much, MUCH love,

Alena

Author's Response: Hi Alena!

This review is SO GREAT.

I've actually entered the challenge with two entries and you're totally right because they are two of the least similar stories I have on the site. I do really enjoy an open ended prompt.

As Albus here was written as a poet, I decided to kind of give this story a bit of rhythm and even some rhyme in quite a few places. I love that you picked up on that.
I have sort of jumping into everything on this site haven't I? Haha, I chalk it up to way too much free time and probably enjoying reading a bit too much.

I can't even believe you want to write like me 'by the time you're ancient!' I was downright terrible at writing just a few years ago, it couldn't possibly take so long, trust me ;D

I know it was sad at the end there :( I thought I was writing fluff at first and then I realized *why* Albus was recounting the moments and I knew that there was no other way. My characters kind of do what they please.

If my Albus will have a place in your heart after such a short story then I have done my job!

I just adore this review! Surprise reviews are the absolute best. Thank you so much!


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