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Reading Reviews for Just a Minute Longer
  
16 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Murishka21 Just a Minute Longer

3rd December 2017:
Once again, an excellent short story. You really are an excellent writer. The best part is my imagination is so amazing I can watch the whole thing as I read and it makes it ten times better. Keep up the great work.

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Review #2, by dinthemidwest Just a Minute Longer

28th June 2016:
This story made me smile!!! Only children often end up with big families-they don't like all the "alone" time... Great take on both Hermione & Draco; their relationship is one of a kind. 10/10!

Author's Response: Glad you liked it, thanks for reading =)

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Review #3, by Grace Just a Minute Longer

6th November 2015:
I am so in love with this. All of it. The whole thing haha. So beautiful and funny and charming. I adore the idea of Draco and Hermione having a million rambunctious, clever, brilliant children and being in love forever just like teenagers. Your vocabulary is awesome and overall this whole one-shot is 10/10.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing.

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Review #4, by 4fan.ci Just a Minute Longer

21st July 2015:
LOVE this One-shot! It's like two stories in one! Usually, I don't believe Hermione Granger would ever kiss Draco like that out of the blue, but after a dream like that, maybe she would. Great job!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I'm pleased you enjoyed the story. Your support is appreciated.

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Review #5, by LadiePnix007 Just a Minute Longer

21st July 2015:
This was brilliant! You completely captured that feeling you get when you have one of those dreams that make you think it was a memory instead of a dream. Loved it

Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I'm pleased you enjoyed the story. Your support is appreciated.

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Review #6, by futurewoman23 Just a Minute Longer

21st July 2015:
this story was amazing in every aspect gahh I loved it! dramione forever

Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I'm pleased you enjoyed the story. Your support is appreciated.

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Review #7, by ArtsyTigs Just a Minute Longer

19th March 2015:
I certainly do... I love that look at what a life together might be like and how much they love each other. Very well written. I also like that when she realized it was a dream I stead of fighting it she deciced that was what she wanted and went for it.

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing. This fic was really fun to write

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Review #8, by Ju Hana Just a Minute Longer

3rd February 2015:
Ahahaha..genius..i really hope u could make a sequel on how they finally take the step forward to deepen their relationship and live happily as the premonition shown..lol

Author's Response: Hey,
Thanks so much for reviewing again. I'm flattered that you've been scouring my page and leaving reviews on all my stories. I will see what I can do about a sequel in future when I've got the time to get to all of them.

xx-Wolfgirl


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Review #9, by crestwood Just a Minute Longer

15th January 2015:
Hi Ellie! I'm finally getting around to filling this review request! I can't believe it's taken me so long and I have no excuse, so I'll just say--review threads are difficult sometimes.

This doesn't have to do with the story exactly, but I think the CI looks incredible!

I think you've done a good job setting the scene in this first paragraph. You've done less of a rundown of what's happened and more slipped it into her normal thoughts. I especially loved the idea of feeling like you've missed a step every time you look at someone. I don't think I've heard that one before, but I totally get what you're saying with it.

Your visual descriptions are spectacular. The picture of Hermione's outfit was painted on quite vividly.

I caught a tiny typo where it says 'not to mention that Scorpius's birthday was coming off' -- I believe that should say 'up' unless that's just a phrase that I've never heard of! (Stranger things have happened honestly)

I think you did a good job explaining the demands of raising kids. You gave us enough of an idea of how difficult all of this running around must be for Hermione. I always find it hard to write 'family' stories, so I do commend you for hitting that nail right on the head!

One thing I noticed was that for a lot of dialogue that didn't end in either a question mark or exclamation mark, you left out a comma where one should be. For example-- "Rascal" Draco laughed, where it should read "Rascal," Draco laughed. It's not a huge deal, but just a little thing that could tighten up the grammar!

I like this dynamic you have given Draco and Hermione. This is so far into the future that I can buy that they wouldn't be exactly the people we knew from canon (I actually think a lot of fanfiction tends to assume incorrectly that people are going to be how they were at 17 forever) and I think that their personalities are well drawn out enough to be believable within the confines of this story.

I think you write young Scorpius so well! He's my favorite of the kids, what with his conjuring of rabbits and feeling so proud of himself for it. Of course, my bias is always completely tipped in his favor, but I just really loved that scene.

I actually am very much inclined to like this 'It was all a dream' twist. It may be a cliche in some forms of media, (film, television, etc.) but I don't see it nearly as much in fanfiction, so it still gets me sometimes :P

I must say that I think I would have preferred if the story ended directly after Hermione woke up, with maybe some hinting at something more between her and Draco. I just thought that their interactions towards the end were a bit out of character, considering how soon after the war this is set. Actually, I have no doubt that Draco could have changed, I just don't think Hermione would be so ready to forgive him for all of those years of mutual disdain, you know? If this were set some years down the line in another setting and given more build up, I could buy it, but here I'm not sure if I can suspend my disbelief quite enough.

That said, I do think that it was well written, even if I could quite buy into it. I typically wouldn't go so into detail with CC about a ship that isn't necessarily my cup of tea, but I know that you can handle a fair bit and will actually put it to use. And you've got a lot of Dramione's planned, so even if you don't plan to edit this one hopefully something I've said may be helpful in the future anyway!

I hope this review helped in some way and even if it didn't, I hope some of the compliments made you smile. Either way, it was a pleasure to stop by and feel free to request again for new stories! :)

Author's Response: Hey Joey,

The CC totally helps. I'm such a slacker for the commas and things, I always forget them, so it's good to have those pointed out so that I make sure to thoroughly edit and catch them all =)

I know what you mean about the end setting for this one. It is a little too OOC. I think I will edit it, maybe even just cut out that bit at the end where it's a dream. I wasn't entirely happy with it to begin with, but I wanted to keep it as a one-shot. Maybe I will remove that last part.

Thanks for catching me on that bit about Scorp's birthday too. Definitely a typo. I'm heading over to edit the whole thing right now.

Thanks so much for reviewing and don't sweat that it took awhile. I'm almost always behind on my reviews offered thread so I would be a hypocrite to be upset over it, and besides, it's you doing me a favour so I have no right to complain. =)

You leave such great reviews so I will probs hit you up for more reviews in future.

Thanks again. Very helpful review =)

xx-Ellie


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Review #10, by Hypno Just a Minute Longer

5th December 2014:
This is so fluffy and feel good and wonderful. I loved it. i like the way it's entirely unrealistic and yet somewhat realistic at the same time... great job. Keep it up. You're stories are brilliant!

Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for taking the time to review.

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Review #11, by Fredericka Just a Minute Longer

13th November 2014:
This is such a change from the first two Dramione's of yours that I read! It's so fluffy and happy and lighthearted and makes me wish I had a loving husband and a houseful of kids. I especially liked the idea that her dream might've been a premonition. I hope so.

Author's Response: thanks for reviewing. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
xx-Wolfgirl17


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Review #12, by brttknee Just a Minute Longer

7th November 2014:
Wow! What an incredible One Shot! I loved every single second of it!!! And yes - it was definitely a premonition ;)

Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun to write. =)
xx-Wolfgirl17


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Review #13, by TidalDragon Just a Minute Longer

27th October 2014:
Howdy! Sorry for the delay!

I will start by saying that I don't think your story needs anything to be more compelling. By and large the writing is well done, especially as you progress deeper into the story. If pressed for one thing mechanics-wise, I'd probably cite balance as an area for improvement. There was an awful lot of dialogue as compared to description and internal thought and with Hermione being in a very different light than we'd ever see her in canon it makes the leap more difficult. You might also consider avoiding redundancy in the descriptions you do use and peppering them with stronger, more evocative language.

In the big picture though, the biggest issue is characterization. I think initially you made a wise choice for a Draco/Hermione fluff piece in fast-forwarding quite some distance to where they have already been married (with children) for an extended period of time. For my taste they were still far too syrupy, but the leap forward made it less difficult to deal with. The problem really arose though when you leapt back to the present. It was an interesting thing to do and had bags of potential, but for me, Hermione just caving to it after waking up stunned didn't read authentically to me. Sometimes there's more power in restraint, and I think for Hermione's character it would have made more sense for any shift in her thinking to have stayed inside her head at that point. I get that that's not what the point of your piece is though, so it's hard to really begrudge you that. I suppose I'd just suggest keeping it well into the future if you're going to do Draco/Hermione fluff - I don't think there can be fluff in the Hogwarts Era between those two based on the events of canon.

Hope the review helps!

Author's Response: Hey TidalDragon,

This review really helped, so thanks for taking the time to do it. I definitely agree with you about the Dramione fluff being pretty much impossible in the Hogwarts era, simply because there's just so much between them that is unfriendly and complicated and that has to be addressed in order for them to get to that kind of fluffy lovey-dovey place, so One-shot's are not really the place for the theme.

And I know what you mean about the excessive amounts of dialogue. I think primarily writing fanfiction is making me lazy regarding the need for descriptive language, because in my head everyone already know what they look like and what the castle is like and all that, so I don't bother. It's a problem I will most certainly have to take the time to work on. I agree about the need for more internal thought too, for the same reason.

Thanks for the review. This definitely helped and has given me some important things to focus on to make my writing better and to make me less lazy as a writer.

xx-Wolfgirl17.


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Review #14, by Hannah Just a Minute Longer

21st October 2014:
This was lovely. I've always wanted a big family and imagined it would be like this. I love the way Draco is so loving and wonderful, and the way Hermione is so exasperated and unable to resist him. I liked the twist at the end to. It would've been awful if it was just that she woke up and felt sad, but that she woke up and snogged Draco and totally went for it makes me hopeful that she was having a premonition of her own future. More please!

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #15, by sophia_byrne Just a Minute Longer

13th October 2014:
Oooh brill story, wasnt expecting that plot twist! Had me falling in love with them all over again... cheers!!

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing. I'm glad you liked it =)


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Review #16, by HollyHogwarts Just a Minute Longer

6th October 2014:
Aha! You were right, i did like that story thank-you for suggesting it.
I was disappointed to read that it was all a dream, but when Draco and Hermione kissed in "real life", it makes you believe that what Hermione had dreamt about could become a reality.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing. I get the feeling a lot of reader were disappointed by the 'and then she woke up' thing, since this is the first review on the story, but I'm glad you liked it. I was definitely going for the idea that she was having some kind of premonition of her future.
xx-Wolfgirl


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