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Reading Reviews for Gone
  
21 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Daphne brown The Disappearance

24th May 2017:
. Oh. my. god. What. did. you. do...?

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Review #2, by Mandy Aspen The Disappearance

13th May 2017:
Scorpius Malfoy, eat your heart out! LOL

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Review #3, by The Melodramatic Muggle The Disappearance

28th May 2015:
Hi, Joey.

I wanted to send the biggest apology your way along with a bunch of flowers and maybe a couple of singing minstrels because it's taken me so long to start leaving you your reviews. But, really, can you blame me? I read this story (along with a couple more of your stories but more on them later) more than a week ago and IT (THEY). BROKE. MY HEART. and my spirit and my mind and my life and I just COULD NOT function. How is one expected to leave a review (that involves using the aforementioned heart, mind and soul) when one is barely able to function? I could not form coherent thoughts or words as I lay simply a puddle of emotions. So, I had to take a few days to recover. -sigh-
Wanna know a secret? -whispers- I am not yet recovered. And, yet, here I am now. I just realised suddenly that you simply HAD to know just how much your wonderful literary creations has managed to shatter me and the fragile emotions that are encased inside this vulnerable soul. -sigh-
This review will be punctuated with sighs. I just felt to warn you about that.
Firstly, I will gush over the sheer skills by which you manipulate words together to form heart-breaking sentences that, together, come at me as soul-shattering paragraphs formed together to one gigantic story designed to make my tears flow like oceans.
Albus. WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ALBUS?! What did Albus ever ever do to deserve SUCH a fate. I think, to myself, what if I had been in his situation? What would I do then? I am fairly (VERY) certain that I would have gone crazy. You wrote Albus to be such a NICE boy so I ask: WHY, Joey? Why would you do that to him? Actually, why do you do that to us? Do you enjoy breaking our hearts? -sigh-
Wanna know another secret? -whispers- Don't ever stop because that'll break our hearts more. I am sure of it.
In this fic, the quote you were given was just so poetic and you managed to capture the heart of it in such a way that was clever and totally unexpectedly. Kudos. Major kudos.
You wrote about the Burrow and your descriptions of it empty and deserted… That was the LAST STRAW. The last straw. The moment that I felt everything was lost. Albus sounded still hopeful in the end but mine was destroyed. I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel, I do not see how things could go worse or what could possibly happen that could make things better or even bearable for Al.
You left us at the end with no answers. No way of knowing what happened nor of what WILL happen. But, you know, I have an answer. You are a completely brilliant writer.

-sigh-

Don't ever stop.

-- The Melodramatic Muggle

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Review #4, by Maelody The Disappearance

12th January 2015:
Hey there! Me again!

So this was an interesting read. Dare I say I'm a little confused, but I think that goes along with the way Albus feels in the entire story. It feels almost very "end of the world" or "rapture" like. Which I like. Those are my favorite kind of movies. Don't worry, though, they always leave me confused at first, too.

Admittedly, I thought maybe Albus was overreacting and that in the end it would be some sort of surprise party for his seventeenth birthday. I figured Harry would have the strings to pull to make it look like the Ministry was empty. Then the Muggle streets were empty and I grew worried, too.

In many a way, I like that the story doesn't have any closure. Albus doesn't know what happened, and therefore we don't know what happened. However, it drives me completely insane, too! I want to know what happened! ;)

I was hoping that in the end, when he went to sleep, he'd wake up and realize it was a dream. Or at least everyone would just pop back up, but you don't offer that sort of solace do you!? :p

Anyway...

I do think this is a truly neat and original piece. It's actually a little unnerving, too. Especially when he was going on about possible alien life or futuristic being having something to do with it or find his world. I got goosebumps reading that bit. If I have nightmares tonight though, I'll just blame you! :p

I liked it, though. I really did. You do a really nice job sewing your words together to make stories flow. I feel like I just slipped right to the end on this one because I didn't take my eyes off it (in fear that it would disappear no doubt). Great job!

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Review #5, by marauderfan The Disappearance

6th January 2015:
I was going to read your new one and I hope you don't mind me going to the end of your AP but I've heard really good things about this story so I decided to go for this one first :p

This story gave me chills! Aaah! Especially that part when he walks into the Ministry of Magic and there's absolutely no-one there. O__O That would be SO EERIE. Gah, you know what this reminds me of? Have you seen the episode of the Twilight Zone where this guy is the last person left on earth with all the books in the world and all the time to read them (and then a thing happens but I'm not going to say, just in case spoilers. :p )

Anyway wow! I especially love the way you built it up with Albus being such a people person who gets a lot of satisfaction out of helping others - he genuinely liked people and people liked him. Which is what makes the fact that all the people disappeared even stronger.

I'm impressed with how long he managed to keep it together by learning what he could and keeping on living, but at a certain point as he looks through old pictures he just wonders why he bothers. I hope for Albus' sake that he loses his mind and thinks everyone is there, because that'd be a happy ending for him at least :p

So what happened to everyone!?!?! Were they either a) vanished and sent into non-being, or b) they are there the whole time but like, out of phase and therefore they aren't aware of Albus' presence and he isn't aware of them? (I watch too much scifi) akjsdfajs but actually I kind of love how you left it as this huge mystery. It just makes me think a lot and I love when stories do that. :D

Brilliant fic, Joey! This was so well done and what a neat idea. I love the originality of your fics.

Author's Response: Yes, I've totally seen that episode of The Twilight Zone!! I wanted this story to basically be a tribute to that show in general, although I didn't immediately realize it when I first got the idea. I wanted there to be that irony of Albus' love for people and his need for company and him being the very person left alone on Earth. I have so much headcanon of this Albus that it's ridiculous. I actually feel bad about doing all of this to him.

I like to think that Albus at least ends up in some kind of happy place, even if he's not really there. I find it morbidly funny that even he hopes that he loses his mind and doesn't remember any of this.

I've gotten so many theories about what happened to everyone. I'm pretty sure every single thing that could have happened has been guessed by now. I honestly am not entirely sure what happened, I didn't even attempt to explain it because everything I thought of sounded so ridiculous. I definitely preferred to leave things a mystery at the end. Glad it made you think!

Thank you so much! I try :D


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Review #6, by Secret Santa The Disappearance

30th December 2014:
Holy. Cow.

Seriously, that was just...wow.

I have never ready a Harry Potter story like that! It was incredible! So creative! So bold! So original! So SAD!

How did you ever think of this plot? I am so curious where the idea came from. I know you can't answer this, being a "secret" review and all, but when this is over and all is revealed, I hope you will tell me!

This story really made me think. I keep thinking how could everyone have disappeared? Was is magic? Or science? Aliens? Or maybe, maybe it was Albus that disappeared. Somehow, he slipped away into an alternate universe or something and everyone else is really left back in the real world wondering where HE went?

Yes, you have seriously made me think. Bravo and thank you for this great, interesting story! I really did love it!

Merry Christmas! I will be back in a few days to give you at least two more gifts.

Author's Response: I am so happy that you've never read a HP story like this one!! That was SO what I was going for with this.

The plot came to me a while after I got the prompt. At first, I was going to go for a straightforward interpretation--after the war, something about grief and such, but then I started reading it over and over until it stopped making sense like that. Somehow, I wanted to stretch that feeling of loss into something larger. And that developed into stretching it as large as I possibly could and having absolutely everyone disappear. I have probably read too much speculative fiction :P

I love to make people think! The idea about Albus himself being the one who really disappeared hasn't been brought up before! That's such an awesome thought and my favorite theory I've received so far.

Thank you for another review!


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Review #7, by Ydnas Odell The Disappearance

28th December 2014:
Al is a believable and well developed character and I enjoyed the simplistic and straightforward style this tale was written in. GONE is an engaging story that feels real despite its surrealistic premise. I am glad that I read this.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I very much attempted a 'matter-of-fact' tone here. Glad you found that the story felt real, thank you for reading.

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Review #8, by awesomepotter The Disappearance

14th December 2014:
Oh my goodness, this story is nothing like any I've read before. The concept is so interesting, and all the unanswered questions - where did they go, why was Albus left behind, will they ever return? - just serve to make this even more enrapturing to read.
I think the way you portrayed Albus' emotions throughout was perfect - the intitial confusion, then realisation, then slight acceptance (or possibly denial) followed by the grief and encroaching madness were so realistically written I couldn't help but feel it with him, all the way through. This is such an incredible piece of writing; everything about it is absolute perfection. I love how Albus only really caves when he sees the photos, that he only truly seems to realise what has happened to him when he sees his friends again (albeit in photograph form). It's just spellbinding from the very first sentence, and I really enjoyed reading it. Thankyou for such a superb piece of writing :)
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Wow, this review surprised me so much! I haven't been around the forums much lately, so I'm just shocked someone came across my stories at all, not to mention reviewed one!

I tend to get these ridiculous 'what ifs' that I can't get out of my head and this is the result of that. I definitely left some unanswered questions here. In a way, I wanted to avoid answering any questions. I just wanted everyone to disappear and that be that. Somehow that seemed more fun than jumping through hoops to explain it.

Absolute perfection is an amazing compliment, thank you so much for this review! It really made my day :)


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Review #9, by Cannons The Disappearance

23rd November 2014:
Hey Joey!

So I hope you don't mind me scrolling this far down your AP but this one really caught my eye. I love the idea of waking up one day and everything is gone. I don't actually want it to happen obviously but it is am intriguing thought to ponder from time to time.

Anyway on to the story and review! I'm going to review this as I go because I feel like that is more fun for you to read my instant reactions. :P

I love this line. - I was just a people person. That may have been the most ironic part of all. - It's just dripping with irony and I must admit I almost laughed. Just the fact that it feels so far as if he has given up and this will be his last stream of thoughts and then there is that sentence right in the middle. And while I nearly laughed it is actually extremely sad. As so far it seems as if Albus is the worst sort of person this could happen to. A people person surround by no people...(btw, I found it interesting that Albus wasn't the brightest of his age as my headcannon is that he is somewhat of a prodigy!)

I loved the part where when he was of age used magic for the smaller thins. Kind of like Fred and George. :/

Also Harry using muggle music to recover after the war? What is this genius? I wish I had thought of that! Love it even more since you used 'muggle music' and as we know Harry didn't have the best experience with muggles. That's one of my favourite things about his character that he picks his battles. (does that make sense?) :P
Basically I love this even more now because you dropped in that sentence!

'I was surprised to see that no one seemed to be home downstairs and even more shockingly; there was no breakfast prepared in the kitchen.' - Used to the good life is Albus? :P

Literally this next part made the hair stand up on the back of my neck. For his house to be empty is one thing and Scorpius' the same but the Burro and the Ministry of Magic? Woah, that's a scary thought. It puts it all into perspective. I just have an image of Albus standing in the gigantic entrance hall to the Ministry of Magic and it to be empty. Not a sound. That would terrify me and with Albus being a people person and everything...

Loved this line as well - She was our resident photographer; or in her words, memory maker. - Such a simple line but so powerful.

I really liked this last paragraph because it was so believable, it is human nature to make the best of a bad situation, in most cases at least, so I really liked that you showed the reader that he carried on and actually flourished despite the problems he faced.

Then he had a setback with the memories. Maybe it was a setback maybe that was the beginning of the end for him? It's neat that you have left it up to the reader. I personally, despite my own stories, would like to believe that he wouldn't give in.

Overall this was a fantastic read, very, very believable which is important given the topic. I would love to know how you did in the challenge?

Also you simply have to turn this in to something more then a one shot. This story has so much potential for expansion it is unreal. I would love to read about more of this world if you ever decide to write more.

Thanks for the swap Joey, I had so much fun reading and reviewing this!

Fin

Author's Response: Still answering reviews that should have been answered a long time ago!

I definitely don't mind, although I'm surprised that you picked the one story without a banner, as that doesn't happen often.

You definitely mined that line for all of the meaning I tried to pack into it! And I totally wrote against my headcanon for this, I usually think of Albus as extremely smart too.

I love the idea of using magic for everything when you've just come of age. I don't know why, but I always loved it.

I really have no clue where that little bit of info came from, but now I just know that Harry was listening to the same music as me after the war even though I have nothing to confirm that at all!

Albus was a bit of a spoiled one, yes. :P

I've always thought that the Ministry would be super creepy without anyone around so I totally tried to evoke that here. I'm glad it got the point across the way it did.

The photos = memories thing is totally true. I've realized that more and more as I grow up.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure if the challenge results will ever be published. :/ It happens that way sometimes though and it's okay because I got a story that I'm quite proud of out of it.

I've considered expanding this and exploring what it'd be like in more depth. I may one day. Of course, at the moment I've got more stories planned than I can count, so it'd have to wait. But, I'd love to see what I could do with this.

Thank you for the review, I'm officially caught up with these things!


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Review #10, by Midnight spark The Disappearance

21st September 2014:
Hey, here with our September Review Exchange!
Let me start by saying this: I LOVE THIS STORY! Such a different idea, from where do you get them???

I loved the beginning: That was my favorite part here. How he started his day pretty normally and then his emotions when he finds out that everyone actually IS gone.

I love Al's confusion, you portrayed it picture-perfect. Even I started to wonder: why is he the only one left? Was it alien invasion? Or a sort of Magic which made it that way? Or was it just a bad dream?

This is one of those one-shots which stay with you long after you finish reading it.

So glad I gt to be your review exchange pair!

~Sana

Author's Response: Hey Sana!

Well, thank you! I got this idea from a really strange interpretation of a quote about grief. I decided that grieving one person wasn't going to be enough, so I made Albus grieve every single person he'd ever known, as well as every other human being on the planet. I like to torture fictional characters a bit too much.

I love that I got you wondering! I definitely wanted this to raise some questions and I typically leave them up to the reader to use their imagination. Although, if my word means anything, I will say that I never write things with the explanation of everything being a dream because I feel as though that negates everything I've written into nothingness. But, if that's what someone's theory is, they're all equally as valid if that's what they took from it.

I'm so glad that you think this'll stay with you, that's such an amazing compliment. Thank you so much for this review!


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Review #11, by casual_chaos The Disappearance

20th September 2014:
Hey Joey!

I don't know if it's because of my love for dystopia, but I was hooked on this as soon as I read the first sentence. What I loved about this story was the instant feeling of dread that crept up on me as soon as I started reading and didn't leave until the very end. You made Albus' voice almost nonchalant, not trying to dramatize the whole thing and that was what made it so unsettling, at least for me. I also liked the fact that you didn't try to explain why the people disappeared, but instead focused on Albus' experience of the events.

There were also these little details that I found especially creative, such as Albus using magic to do simple tasks, just because he is finally allowed to, or Rose missing from the photographs because she was ''the memory maker''.

''I was just a people person. That may have been the most ironic part of all.'' This quote was the highlight of the story for me, perfectly summing up the sadly ridiculous situation he has found himself in.

All in all, I truly enjoyed this story! It worked pretty well as a one-shot but I actually wished it would be a novel. :)

- Andy

Author's Response: Andy! I must say I love these surprise reviews.

I love dystopia as well. I'm so happy that feeling of dread was present!!! That was my exact intention. Al was practically hysterical by the point of writing this, so his narration probably should sound a little unsettling haha.

I thought it more prudent to leave the reason for the disappearance completely open to interpretation. I always like to leave things to the imagination.

I added those little details very much on purpose because I figured that the reader couldn't fully understand his grief about losing his old life if they never got a glimpse of what it was like.

I really loved that line I'm so glad you mentioned it!! Maybe one of my favorite things I've ever written.

Thank you for all of your compliments! I'm sorry I didn't turn this into a novel, but I do have some novel length stuff coming that I hope you like. Thanks for the review!


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Review #12, by pointless_proclamations The Disappearance

16th September 2014:
Joseph, I cannot believe that I am reading this when I am at home. . . all alone. Can you imagine what happens in a situation like this?

Your first paragraph reminds me of a conversation we had about people disappearing from our lives (and our disappearing from other people's lives). Anyway. You said, "people typically don't just disappear." And what have you done here? You made people just disappear.

Here's what that does: As inquisitive as you know me to be, I refused to just accept that. Where did everybody go? How did this happen? Can they be brought back? Did they just cease to exist? Then I went on a mental tangent about the conservation of mass. Why didn't Albus disappear, too? Granted, I do understand the literary irony for that last question.

Here are some odder, but rather irrelevant questions you had me considering: What if he was the only one who had ever lived and dreamed up his whole life until now? Are humans the only species that have disappeared?

I was positively outraged (positively because I believe you meant to inspire that emotion in readers). You allowed for almost no rationalisation and I hated (positively, of course) that because it's in my nature to try to rationalise.

But you forced me to stop thinking about why that happened and introspect. All alone at home, right now, I thought about how I would feel if this happened to me, what would happen if I stumbled across my own photo album with all those moments immortalised, but never to be re-lived.

Part of humanity is being connected to what is both tangible and intangible and you reminded me of that beautifully here. Another part of that is being so connected with people that, extrovert or introvert, these kinds of situations have a massive effect on us. What happens to our hopes and our goals when there is no other human on this planet? I have never realised how much these rely on other people until this captivating piece.

Undoubtedly, this is a brilliant piece. I cannot stress just how amazing it is. This is a story that goes beyond anything I've read before. It's so. . . full of meaning and thought-provoking. As it always does, your style of writing just amplified my admiration for your ability to create what turns out to be more than just stories. Where do you keep coming up with such innovative pieces of art that never cease to astound me?

Author's Response: Emilie.. this review.. OH MY. I spent so long trying to type out a worthy response that I broke my own rule and allowed 7 Reviews to sit unanswered overnight. I just knew I needed to sit down and respond to this properly.

I recall the exact conversation! It's funny that I've gone and wrote a story about people *literally* disappearing now. I thought you'd find this one a bit frustrating.

I just love love love that I got you to ask yourself all of those questions. Especially the conservation of mass one because I mean, who else would even think of that but you?
Wow, the only person who ever lived huh? That's one detailed dream for you; all of human existence. I'd like to think that humans are the only species that has ever disappeared. Unless, they're getting picked off one by one. Now I'm picturing aliens with disintegration rays blasting cows into nothingness.

I was not allowing even one bit of rational explanation here. I decided that I wasn't even going to try. I'm just going to drop you all off into this world and tell you that Albus is the only person now and that is just that. So, I can see where the outrage would come from haha.

But, luckily I did eventually get you to forget about the reasoning behind it all and place yourself in Albus' shoes! You have hit upon just every themed I wanted to convey here. I wanted to point out just how dependent all of our goals are on the comparison with or effect on other people. There's just a lot less of a reason to live once everything you do kind of exists in a vacuum.

Beyond anything you've ever read before?! More than just stories?! You say these things to me that just leave me absolutely speechless and grinning like a madman. Thank you so much for this review! It was just so perfect, really.


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Review #13, by nott theodore The Disappearance

16th September 2014:
Hi there! I'm here for our review swap!

Ah, I couldn't resist picking this story when I saw it, as the title and summary were so intriguing and I also love this poem, so I couldn't wait to see how you interpreted it and used it to influence this one-shot!

This was really different to anything that I've read on the archives before. It was really original to read something like this - quite dark and a bit chilling, really, but nevertheless I really enjoyed it! I think the fact that this was a one-shot worked brilliantly too. It had much more of an impact than a longer story probably would have done, because there was no attempt at explanation of what had happened. It just happened. It was stated as fact and because of that we just accepted that suddenly everyone had disappeared and Albus was left there on his own. But I think that meant there was more of an impact - no way of changing what had happened, it just suddenly occurred. I thought it was a great idea and executed very well.

I liked your choice of Albus as the protagonist in this story, too. It worked really well because it's far enough removed from the books to make it completely believable and yet he's closely connected enough with the main characters in the series that we really feel the fact that he's left on his own. The fact that he was so young when it happened was powerful, too, because he could barely survive on his own. Just the brief mention of the fact that he only knew how to make eggs and muffins for his breakfast emphasised that really well, because there are so many life skills that he hasn't had the chance to learn and yet he's suddenly faced with this situation where he's all alone and there's no way out of it.

I thought you wrote Albus's behaviour and reactions to the situation very well too. He didn't know what had happened but at first, although it was quite creepy, he didn't panic too much about it because he hoped that they were going to come back. After all, it could have just been a dream at the beginning. I like the fact that he decides he's going to live his life as well, because it shows this survival instinct - there's not much else he can really do if he wants to carry on and hope that one day he's going to find someone else who's made it through whatever happened to cause everyone else to disappear. But he does flourish for a while - I think in a way it might be easier to, as he's got nobody else to compare himself to now.

The scene with the photograph album was very poignant and powerful. Albus has managed to get by just by pretending that everything's normal and going about his life day by day as if there's nothing really changed, but the reminder that this photo album brings, of all the things and the people that he's lost, would be horrible for anyone. I can understand why he'd break down in tears!

The disappearance is really intriguing - I can't help but wonder why they disappeared and why Albus was the only one left. But I think it's better that you didn't tell us, as it leaves more room for our imagination to come up with explanations and keeps Albus in the dark.

Albus, even at the end, shows some of that survival instinct that's kept him going through all of this so far. Even though he's writing a letter to no one and thinking that he might succumb to madness soon, I think he's fighting it a little by recording his story and showing that he wants to carry on. But the last words were really fantastic, and tied in so well with the story.

This was a really great one-shot, and I thought it was an original and well-written idea!

Sian :)

Author's Response: Hi Sian!

I'm glad I managed to write something original, as well as chilling! You definitely understand why I made this a one shot. I didn't want to give any reason behind what happened at all. I wanted there to be no hope and no answers at the end of it all.

Yes, Albus was chosen because we know his family so well and hopefully could feel his loss along with him a bit better, as well as the fact that I could make him really young reasonably within canon. He truly is quite unprepared for the world at large, as he's only ever lived at home or at Hogwarts. Fortunately for him, he has all the time in the world to learn now, I suppose.

I think Albus holds up in this situation a lot better than most people would. Like you said, he even begins to flourish as a person. Learning and improving himself with all of his newfound free time. But, I couldn't end it on a good note, of course. The photo album was the first device that came to mind that would stress everything that he left behind so suddenly.

I love leaving endings really ambiguous because I think when you leave your readers with something extra to ponder, the story has that much more of an effect on them. And, it's really fun to hear all of the ideas that people come up with.

The letter to no one was kind of Albus' final stand. He refused to let this little incident come and go as if it never happened.
I'm thrilled that I used the quote well! I was nervous that it didn't tie in as well as I would have liked! So happy that was effective.

I certainly understand the abundance of Best Reviewer nominations you received now. Thank you so much for your kind words, this review was so amazing!


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Review #14, by R o s m e r t a The Disappearance

16th September 2014:
Hey there! Here for our review swap :)

I'm so sorry it took me a while to get around to actually reviewing; I got caught up in real-world work (gross), but then I started reading 'Gone' and loved it so much I went on to read all of your other work before I fell asleep. I came back to review this one because it was so singularly mind-blowing. Even on the second reading it gave me chills. It's all just so well done.

First of all, I love the format and the sense that Albus is writing the letter in the hopes of preserving something about what's happened because he knows he probably won't have the mental competency to do so much longer. Against all odds, he's still holding out that little bit of hope that there's someone or something out there somewhere who might understand, even if it will be too late for him by that point. I think, as 'out there' as the premise of this story is, the way Albus handles the situation is entirely realistic.

This may be a bit odd, but I kind of enjoyed the fact that he was able to take advantage (as best he could, at least) of the fact that he no longer had any societal obligations, and did all the things he'd always wanted to do before but never had the time. Although it seems he was still in denial at that point, I'm glad there was that small sliver of light for such a good person who was subjected to quite possibly the cruelest of fates.

The photo album absolutely wrecked me. It's easy to know how Albus feels on some scale because (as I'm sure is the case with just about everyone) I've lost more than one person near and dear to me. Memories like that are always bittersweet. I can't imagine what it would be like to experience those feelings with every single person I've ever known, but you did such a great job helping the reader empathize with Albus there: the screaming, the tears, all of it.

In case it isn't obvious, I'm a huge fan of your writing. When I have more time a bit later, I'm coming back to review 'Wake Up, Rose;' I'm very intrigued by the story and hopefully can give you the push you need to update :)

Thanks so much for doing the swap, and good luck with your challenge! Xo Blair

Author's Response: I can't even begin to address the fact that you read all of my work just because you wanted to.. that makes me so, so happy. wow. thank you so much.

I wanted him to react to this situation as realistically as possible. I wanted to show a candid picture of someone slowly losing his mind. This premise didn't allow for anything else in my mind. I certainly knew from the very beginning that he'd take advantage of the time and concentration he was afforded, at least for a while.

I wanted to give this story a bit of a downer ending. A photo album was just the first thing that came to mind that would enable me to remind Albus of his life that is now gone for good. I'm so glad you were able to empathize!

You've really made my day by saying you're a huge fan of my writing! That means just SO much. And Wake Up, Rose. is the story of mine that I'm least sure about. I'm going to edit the second chapter a tad and then I was planning on continuing forward with it, but I'm really not entirely certain about it. Knowing someone is interested does help though!

Thank you so much for the swap, this review was amazing!


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Review #15, by Yoshi_Kitten The Disappearance

16th September 2014:
At first I was like: "What is this? What am I reading right now?" But then I remembered that this was one of YOUR fics and I was like: "Oh yeah, Joey wrote this so it's okay!" Like ALL of your stories are so dark and interesting, lol, they really make you think!! And you have this unique style of writing about you to where I can just read something and know it came from you. You are a very distinguishable author, Joey, and your pieces are always memorable. This one-shot was no exception! (:

The concept behind this little tale is so frightening! Where did you get the inspiration for such an idea? I cannot even begin to imagine what I'd do if I were to ever wake up to a situation like this. Not sure if I'd have the strength to endure it for as long as Al did here tho... I think the most creep part of this was imagining the Burrow empty and void of all activity. Like Al, I think that was when it became more real to me as I was reading this. I kept waiting and waiting for there to be some sort of catch; like maybe he was having a bad dream or something. But then I realized that this was really happening and I just felt so depressed for Al. I wanted to reach in and give him a hug, lol!

Of all the characters you could have chosen to center this fic on tho, I am glad that you chose Albus. The scene where he was flipping thru the old photo album broke my heart. (Btw, you describing Rose as the photographer reminded me of Em's fic, haha!) I'm glad to see that Al and Scorpius were such good friends. It was a bit weird seeing Scorpius portrayed as the brainy one, instead of Rose. But then again, you're always changing it up and forcing us to view these characters in a new light like that, which I quite enjoy.

The ending was so sad. You ended it perfectly, mind you, but it was still heartbreaking nonetheless. Just to see Al consciously telling "no one" in particular that he knew he was going to go crazy one day. Heck, he was probly already a little out of his mind while he was writing this letter. Anyway, the concept is very depressing. ='(

I'm not sure what to feel right now, lol. This one-shot was great, even if it did not have the happy ending that I was hoping for. I seriously love all of you writing, Joey. Can't wait to see more, cuz you are amazing!!! =)

10/10
~Deana~

Author's Response: Haha, I'm glad I'm getting a reputation for the dark and interesting from you. I just find it fun to explore things that I haven't seen explored before on the site. And developing a signature style of writing is one of my main goals, thank you!!

This is what I took from that quote at the end! I don't think this is what most people would have thought of, but then again, that's exactly why I wrote it! I had to add in the part about the Burrow being empty to really drive home the emotional point, I think. And, I hardly ever give my stories like this a catch. I always force my characters to suffer freely and in reality haha.

I didn't do that on purpose, but that is a funny little connection. I bet Annett would be mostly fine in this situation, lol. I try my hardest to make Al and Scorpius friends, unless it completely contradicts my story. I do like switching up the traits I assign to the Next-Gen kids periodically to keep everyone on their toes, I must say.

I know the end was depressing, but the ending I had in mind at first was a whole LOT worse. This is, by far, the more hopeful of the two. Take from that what you will. I'm so happy that you love my writing. I hope to upload much more soon! Thanks for the swap Deana!


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Review #16, by Unicorn_Charm The Disappearance

15th September 2014:
Hi there! Here for the swawp!

This is something right out of my nightmares. I can't imagine waking up one day to find that you are the only living soul in the world. It's utterly terrifying. It's amazing that Al seemed to keep it together for as long as he did. It had to be quite some time if he mastered non-verbal spells, wandless magic and created his own spells.

I love the format of this, how it's a letter that he's writing to no one, instead of just his thoughts. It's very poetic, which fits so well with your challenge. It all fit very well with your quote, well done on that!

This just has me dying to know, what happened?! Why did everyone suddenly disappear? And why was Al the only one left behind? Like he stated, he was a good person, he didn't warrant that kind of punishment. He was absolutely right.

It was so sad to see that he knows he's going to eventually go mad from the isolation. How could you not, honestly. This is such a horrible fate for poor Al. Absolutely heartbreaking.

This story was fantastic! It was mysterious, scary and so beautifully written. I can now say I've read everything you've posted, and there isn't anything I did not love. You're very talented. :)

Thank you for doing the swap and good luck on your challenge!!

xoxo Meg

Author's Response: Hi Meg!

I think that Al's preoccupation with improving his magic and obsessively reading and everything was in efforts to keep himself busy and not sitting around thinking about his predicament.

The letter to no one thing is actually style I used once before for a school assignment and this story felt like as good a chance as any to try it out again. SO happy you liked it! Poetic is one of my favorite compliments :)

I thought about writing out a reason for everyone's disappearance, but there was no way to write it without it being almost too depressing. And the ending that implies that he goes insane.. is the least depressing of the two drafts.

Thank you so much for all of the compliments! And it means so much to have you call me talented, really. Thank you for the swap!


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Review #17, by AdinaPuff The Disappearance

15th September 2014:
Hi Joey!

This was a rather unsettling read, I have to admit. The idea of everyone in the world disappearing, and one being left on their own, is extremely scary. You definitely took that original idea and ran with it, settling into Albus's frame of mind. I loved how he thought of his friends and family the whole time, analyzing the situation and trying to think where his friends would be. You developed his character really well in such few words and actions.

You gradually added to the grief and loneliness, which is yet another thing to applaud! His realization that he was alone, to the coping with that idea, and then slowly going insane and becoming depressed. It was gradual and natural.

Great job!

-Leigh

Author's Response: Hi Leigh!

I'm glad I pulled off unsettling. I definitely was aiming for it. It's great to hear that you thought my characterization was good, even in so few words.

You really understand the things I tried to do here and I appreciate all of your kind words :)

Thanks for the swap!


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Review #18, by Drecklin The Disappearance

14th September 2014:
Hello! Drecklin here from the forums, just popping in to support another snake! I wasn't sure what I was expecting when I started reading this story, but I'm really glad I did read it. It was incredibly interesting, and slightly depressing at how well you captured the hopelessness of the whole situation. I can't imagine what I would do in his situation, and I just think you did so well with this!

It was a nice little read, and I'm very impressed with how well you made me like the story while still maintaining that deep sadness of loss.

Great one-shot! And go Slytherin :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much first of all just for stopping by. This is such an awesome surprise!

I'm so glad that I managed to interest you with this, even though it was a bit depressing! I definitely wanted to play up the hopelessness you'd feel in this kind of situation. I really appreciate your kind words, thank you for this. See you in the pit!


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Review #19, by teh tarik The Disappearance

13th September 2014:
Hey crestwood!

I'm here for the review swap at last.

What a great idea for a story! The whole fic was incredibly unsettling, but it became even more and more hopeless, and the ending was pretty depressing, but I guess it's a fitting ending for a fic dealing with this subject matter. I think you did a brilliant job getting into Albus's frame of mind. You went through all his emotions: his fondness and sentimentality for Harry and their shared love in Muggle music, his mates in school, especially Scorpius, to his sense of bewilderment and increasing horror when he finds everybody is gone. And the last paragraph, where he's pretty much without hope, and he no longer tries to find out what happened to the world, and instead is resigned that he'll one day go mad. He's almost embracing the thought of madness and losing his mind, and it's easy to see why - it will be a form of escapism from this awful isolation.

Your writing is really good and your first person narrative flows really well. You've maintained a great level of suspense and tension throughout the fic, so even though Albus didn't interact with any other characters, I was still so absorbed in your fic. I really wish I knew what happened, but I guess Albus doesn't care anymore. It's a great choice to use first person POV for this story; I thought you exploited the limitations of this perspective very well.

This was an amazing and very original story! I really enjoyed reading this; thanks for doing a swap with me. :)

-teh

Author's Response: Hey teh!

I certainly was going for unsettling here. You're spot on about Albus' embrace of losing his mind and why; he just wants to find a way out from all of it. Granted, the ending that I originally had planned was a lot more depressing than this one.. I didn't go with it though and instead opted for a graceful fall into insanity kind of thing.

I'm so glad that the tension of the chapter wasn't lost because Albus is the only character. I was nervous with their being no real dialogue or person to person interaction of any sort in this. At first I was going to go with third person, but then I considered that maybe he could write a sort of letter to the aliens or something and this here kind of happened. For some reason, I'm such a fan of ambiguous endings and I thought this derailing Albus would give me a good reason not to explain how happened. I thought if I did explain, it'd end up being underwhelming somehow, so I just didn't.

So happy you enjoyed this, thank you for your incredible compliments! and thanks for the swap!


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Review #20, by Veritaserum27 The Disappearance

12th September 2014:
Hi crestwood!

Here for the review swap!

I love your work. First off, it is so different than anything else on this site and secondly, it is just done so well. This story kept me glued to the screen for the whole thing. When I got to the end, I had to check the word count because I can't believe that you fit so much into less than 1500 words. It is truly amazing.

The beginning was perfect. It draws the reader in - and lets them know they should just hold on for the roller coaster ride that is about to begin. We get a glimpse of Albus and his nice, safe life. Then we follow him through the confusion, realization and all emotions that follow in understanding his situation. It makes me think - if he is the one the everyone likes, perhaps he was left behind because he was the only truly good person on the earth. More and more irony - he is sentenced to torture because of his altruism... Oh. So much to think about.

My only (small) cc is that I would've added another few lines or paragraph right before the season changing paragraph. I think you can put in a few words about his emotions during those first few days and how lonely Albus felt.

The ending brings us back to Albus's innermost desires: to be with his friends and family. He fondly recalls mundane moments and treasures them. It almost seems as if he felt he took those little things for granted and that is his biggest regret.

I thought the quote was amazingly, beautifully, crafted into the story. They way that you implied that Albus's sanity was also passing away was so incredibly brilliant. Great one-shot!

Beth

Author's Response: Hey!

It means so much that you love my work! I really do try to try new things that I haven't seen on the site and it's awesome that it pays off. And, yeah I kept this really short, attempting to make it seem like a quickly scribbled note, rather than a carefully planned dissertation.

The entire first paragraph came to me all at once. I got the idea and then wrote it down all at once. I wrote it on a napkin actually because I had left my phone at home. Needless to say, my friends think I'm strange. And wow, about your reasoning for him being left behind, I will tell you that didn't even cross my mind, but I really love that explanation so now it's my official stance on the matter. That'd make the 'people person' irony even stronger. He's actually left behind *because* he's a people person.

I see what you mean about those lines before the change in seasons. I actually am going to add something in after the challenge is over, just to spruce this up a bit for anyone who might stumble across it.

I think in a way, most people do take those little moments they share with the people they care about for granted. But, Al certainly didn't purposely, he just assumed that there'd be time.

Thank you so much for this review. You're so kind to me!


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Review #21, by mymischiefmanaged The Disappearance

12th September 2014:
Joey! Oh my goodness, this one-shot...

Well, I can't exactly say I enjoyed it. That wouldn't be the right word really. This is such a horrible idea and I feel awful for Albus having to go through it. That said, as a piece of writing it's incredible.

You have a wonderful writing style. You really don't waste words, and use very simple language to pull of hugely original ideas. I'm very impressed.

There were lots of little things I loved about this. The tiny bits of characterisation we got into Al's friends and family were great (Rose as a Quidditch player, smart but smirking Scorpius, James pulling pranks, Harry struggling after the war, etc etc).

And then you manage to give Al such a real voice. He has a very straightforward way of thinking that lets you give the details of the story pretty reliably through his POV, but you touch on his emotions in a way that makes it impossible not to feel for him as a character.

I'd love to know more about what's going on in this one, but I guess the point of it is that it's unexplained. It's the kind of idea you could definitely expand into a novel if you came up with all the back story and an explanation for why Albus is the one left behind, but as a one-shot it still works extremely well.

I'm really glad I read this.

Much love,

Emma x

Author's Response: Emma!! Thank you so much for this review. I wish I could give you one in return but I've been through everything on your Author's Page haha!

It seems like I pretty often write things that almost challenge readers to like it. It's like - this is depressing, but I'm going to try my hardest to make you enjoy it.

I'm so glad you liked my little tidbits of information about the people he knew! Obviously, the nature of this meant it could only have one character, but I wanted to give some others at least a mention.

I can't even say how happy I am that you liked Al's voice and emotions, especially since that is actually the entirety of this kind of story. It's awesome that you think this idea could be expanded into a novel, but still works as a one-shot. I was kind of hoping to turn a novel-sized idea into a small amount of words here.

Thank you so much, this was such a nice surprise!


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