Reading Reviews for Jigsaw
99 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Ohpl Piece #22

30th November 2015:
Loved the chapter. Love the story as a whole. Can't wait for your next chapter.

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Review #2, by Ohpl Piece #20

12th November 2015:
I love this story. It was terrific to have two updates so quickly.Can't wait for the next one.

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Review #3, by StarFeather Piece #6

5th November 2015:
Hi, Sian. I saw your update status for Jigsaw, so I came back here.
Wow, in your magical world, they use Muggle mobile phone, it’s clever!

When I read these parts, “ so magical London is a little quieter, with the children back at school and the majority of tourists returning to warmer climes,”
I remembered when I visited Scotland like a picture I took, I saw some school children in their uniform.

Oh, was Simon Upton released without charge? So both Hitwizards and Aurors couldn’t find enough evidence to send him to Azkaban.

I feel pity for Roxanne, I wish she won’t be back to the previous boring articles.

Though there’re lots of your splendid descriptions, I like this sentence, too!! "Gringotts rises up ahead of me, the snowy white like peaks of mountains, almost disappearing into the haze of warm sunlight, dominating the wizarding skyline.”

And the next paragraphs are very intriguing. What happened to Jane? Is she missing?

I also like the description of Belby’s. We have the similar second hand book shops in my country, I could imagine how the bookshop was like.

I really like the episode why Roxanne became a journalist, “I’ve spent so many of my days off in here that they know me by name now,.. it’s not knowledge I’m searching for, but stories-even the faded inscriptions written inside a front cover tell a tale. My passion for stories is the real reason I became a journalist,”

And wow,wow, she met Daniel at her favorite bookshop, what a situation! After her letter, how would he react? With much expectation, we wait for his next move. And he nods! Even he suggested somewhere on Diagon Alley, there’s still hope they can go back together.

Oh, Daniel understands her well. “I always said that Higgins was an idiot for not giving you a bigger story before.” He cares about her.

“it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with him in the first place.” Reading this part, I nodded, too, wishing he would forgive her.

Her thought, “Upton possibly had for harming Armstrong is the recent promotion they were both competing for, which the latter eventually attained,” is correct but why did she feel a bit flimsy?

“I can see the glint in his eye that makes it clear he’s just thought of an idea, a sliver of the mystery becoming clearer to him as he talks it through with me.” This sentence is inviting us to the next chapters of your story. We wish Roxanne and Daniel will get together and solve the case.

When she told Daniel that she still did love him, I wished “Believe her!” And finally, he said, “I believe you.” Yes! But he said later, “I need time, Roxy,” oh again? No! If I were Daniel, I would forgive her. Oh, poor Roxy, she kept the tears from appearing in her eyes.

Sian, I really like how you ended this chapter. They will go to the spot where Armstong was found. I hope I’ll be able to be back to the next chapter, soon!


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Review #4, by cookies Piece #18

2nd November 2015:
Hi, i'm a new reader and i'm really really enjoying this story (perhaps the fact that i stayed up till like 4am reading up to this far might be some indication)

I like the way you write the Weasley family, and how you've characterised everyone so well and also how not everyone is introduced to in one go, characters come and go in a natural setting. I also love the tension between Roxanne, Fred, James and Lily, I applaud you for going against fanfic convention which is that everyone in the Wotter clan are always getting on wonderfully with each other. I'm particularly curious about Fred, and wonder if what ever he's getting up to is related to the potion problems. I feel like he's being extremely unreasonable and that Roxanne should stop feeling bad, she made a mistake but she's apologized for it and that should be the end of that especially since Fred's not even that involved.

I think it also shows how good you are at writing mystery in that i have no clue what's going to happen next! I like the little connections you've made, and it's clear you've planned the fic well so it's going to be great to finally know who's behind everything.

It was a bit harsh for Higgins to fire Roxanne like that but Miranda probably had some hand in it, poor Roxy, and poor Jane too but i admire Jane's spirit and think how her accounting training is actually quite funny- i would never have imagined her to take up something like that, ha! I like how you've emphasized on Roxanne's constant underlying feelings of wanting to do something that will make her just as successful as her cousins and parents and also the want to be independent. I really do hope Roxanne is the one to solve the mystery in the end, i'm not sure how she'll do that before the hit wizards but then again you've suggested that some ministry infiltration might be going on so maybe Roxanne will really take things into her own hands...

So so curious to find out what's going on with Richard too, i hope Roxanne pays him a visit some how. I love the supporting characters in the story like Vicky and her nail polish and Jenson and his creepiness and all the other journalists. Also love Al's story and his interest in history, very original! This review is much longer than i thought it'd be but it's probably because i was rambling for nearly all of it xD

Anyway update soon :)

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Review #5, by StarFeather Piece #5

18th October 2015:
Hi, Sian!

Thank you for leaving kind review the other day. As you’ve written below, the mystery of Daniel and Fred have finally been revealed.
The House of Horrors is REAL. Jealousy makes people go mad.

The description of London skyline is superb! I imagined how it was like remembering that of Tokyo. We have the very same view: forest of tall buildings and pedestrians below look like ants indeed.

In the next paragraph, the culprit entered finally drinking expensive water of life, whiskey. I wondered what whiskey he was drinking. (I recommend him Yamazaki, Japanese expensive whiskey.) Then two men appeared from the green flames. Are they Hit Wizards? He knew who they were, glancing at them, I guess they may be members of Potter or Wealsey.

The reason why Roxanne and Daniel broke up was revealed, too. I could understand their complicated relationship. The man was too busy to spare time for his girlfriend and the woman was unhappy for his long absence. I had hunch that it would be more difficult for her to get back their previous relationship when Lily entered.

At the end, please let me mention your wonderful poetic expression. I’m very impressed by your work again. I love these sentences: the tiny ember of hope that I thought was extinguished the last time that I saw him reignites, a chain of maybes and what ifs floating through my mind.

I hope I can be back to the next chapter soon!


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Review #6, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Piece #9

17th October 2015:
Wow, I'm sorry for my abrupt disappearance. Here I am, reviewing your last chapter and saying that I really look forward to reading each new chapter of this and that I can't stop thinking about it and then... I disappear. Truly, it had nothing to do with the story. :P I just got slammed when I went back to school and kind of faded away for awhile. But I'm going to do my best to fade back in now. And the first thing I'm doing on my way back in is returning to Jigsaw!

So anyway, here I am again. I love Roxanne's continuing ambition right at the start of this chapter. That line that she's going to be the one to find the link between the murder and the disappearance was fantastic-- all confidence. I really like this girl!

Small typo, just so you're aware: "The only ones who’ll benefit financially from his death are a number of Muggle charities, and it’s unlikely that they were involved; he has *non* family to speak of."

I like the way this story is beginning to play with the boundaries of the definitions of both journalists and detectives, and keeping an eye on where they overlap. On the one hand, you have the media, a profession often viewed as biased and intrusive. Then you have this image of the detective, who's usually more respected and more intelligent. And here you have Roxanne, technically a journalist but toeing the line of detectives and mystery solving. I don't know how much of that is intentional or just a natural extension of Roxanne's characterization, but it could be a really neat tension for you to play around with more if you're not purposefully doing it already. The references to Roxanne reading mystery novels and enjoying solving them halfway through were what initially caught my eye.

Loved this moment: "I had to resist the urge to point out that Armstrong’s death is an even bigger mystery that still is nowhere near being solved, over a week after his body was found. He had been rather tipsy by that point, after all." Pretty typical, hilarious nerd moment, when the doctor is more excited by the mystery substance than the mystery death. Made me smile.

Hmm... Odd that Fred darts suspiciously into an apothecary moments after Roxanne muses about illegal potions. Coincidence...? Or incriminating...? Guess I'll have to wait and see.

I think you tackled the complexities of the conversation between Roxanne and Daniel really well. At first I was a little surprised that you thought Daniel would be willing to talk casually about the case at all to Roxanne, but you quickly made it clear that there were a couple lines he couldn't legally cross and that he was trying very hard to keep them in place. And you also did a nice job of invoking Roxanne's genuine curiosity in the case rather than some evil journalistic greed to land a scoop. If anything, all of that shows that there is some basic level of trust between the two of them, even if, professionally, they're limited to what they can discuss.

At the same time... Throughout Daniel and Roxanne's conversation, she does a lot of analyzing. Most of it seems to be either analyzing his physical movements or expressions and then interpreting (which shows us how well she knows him) or otherwise she's worrying about and overanalyzing everything either of them does in order to try and see where their relationship stands. I totally get that Roxanne must know Daniel well, and I totally get that anyone in her situation would do the same amount of overthinking and overworrying. But at the same time... As a reader, I began to wish there was a little less analysis, just so that I could try and interpret some of the things on my own. It seemed like every single time either character opened their mouths, Roxanne was thinking about something and we heard about it. I wonder what would happen if, from time to time, you just gave us two to three lines of dialogue without any added inner monologue, and let the reader run with it. Just a thought. And I'm sorry that this semi-contradicts what I just said in the previous paragraph. :P I'd be happy to talk about in more detail if you ever want to, or if I notice it again in later chapters.

That said, the two dramatic endings in quick succession worked really well. The interruption from Paul Jordan was really well done, such a quick change in pace that really got things moving. And then the real chapter ending, well, of course that's exciting too. And I'm thrilled that Richard called Roxanne personally, instead of just waiting for Miranda. Neat!

Anyway, I hope this is the start of a much more regular bout of reading and reviewing, and of more regular time spent on hpff in general. Looking forward to the next chapter. Great job with this one!

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Review #7, by Holly Piece #18

4th October 2015:
Gosh and the plot thickens! Love the mystery and Roxy turning into a detective. Would be really cool if she does some snooping! Can't believe Daniel is leading her on and Fred isn't talking to her, she didn't do anything serious - plus she lost her job, hope things look up for her soon! Love the story and intrigue, can't wait to read what happens next :)

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Review #8, by Randomcships Piece #17

19th September 2015:
Yay you updated :D
I really want to say this chapter was amazing. I mean, it was frustrating at times with Roxanne not standing up for herself to the others (for goodness sake, it was only a dance and Rox didn't even know Paul and Dan knew each other, their making it into too big of a deal for one silly dance). Having said that, I really love how fluffy this chapter was, I really couldn't stop smiling. Hope the marathon went well and I look forward to your next update.

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Review #9, by TidalDragon Piece #4

2nd September 2015:
My favorite thing about this installment was how it gave Roxanne some new dimension. We've seen how she's been learning on the job still and growing in confidence working her new story among the new circle she's begun traveling in after grinding away unrecognized for years. But here we see the impact it's had on her personal interactions. Though the potential was always there being George's daughter, she's developed quite a clever tongue, evading and deflecting, twisting around issues and deceiving with ease.
It's not particularly flattering, but what I like about it is how AUTHENTIC that is. It's easy to write perfection or imperfection - the absolutes. It's harder to write both in the same person, especially in first-person because of the blinders that individual will have about themselves that make it more of a challenge to have both strengths and weaknesses show clearly. You did an excellent job of it.

Of course, I can't conclude my review without mentioning the glimpse we get of the person and place I can only assume are holding Malcolm. Enticing in its ill-defined state, but chilling in the detail we are given - I wouldn't want to be there that's for sure.

Looking forward to seeing how the story continues to develop as I continue to chug along!

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Review #10, by TidalDragon Piece #3

2nd September 2015:
It was interesting to see how Roxanne seemed to learn from her previous experience that point I brought up, that what gets avoided can signal clearly that it's more important to the speaker in these situations than what is actually said. Despite what happens in the bullpen with Miranda & Co. it's neat to be taking these lessons along with her and seeing her react and already become more confident. She has that drive about her that she knows the job has to get done too and though she's professionally motivated to do so, I think you're doing a good job underscoring how her background and unique perspective may help with that. She's obviously impressed the pool enough to get asked to the pub with them directly unlike Collins, who feels more like an unwanted tag-along.

The family dynamics you've mentioned are also intriguing me. Though they're never too heavy, serving instead as the delicious seasoning on the steak that is your story they've definitely piqued my interest - even more so with Lily - because the anger toward Roxanne appears quite firm at the moment, yet simultaneously vague. Given your talents I find myself asking the whether it's relevant to the major arc's resolution or a mystery within a mystery to distract us instead while developing Roxanne. We shall see...

The one thing I did note - and this is a personal preference probably more than anything, so just ignore it if you like - was the place at the top where you wrote "I don't need to add..." That always sticks out to me in writing as drawing attention to something that, if you're using that prefacing language, truly may be unnecessary. Here, I can see where you both wanted to break the dialogue there probably - and perhaps add to Roxanne's voice with an aside-like comment, but it just stuck out to me in a "meh" sort of way.

A minor minor and highly subjective thing anyway though in another excellent chapter!

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Review #11, by TidalDragon Piece #2

2nd September 2015:
Howdy Sian! By now you must've begun the think you'd never find me haunting the hallowed grounds of your story after all. But I have finally prevailed against my untimely illness and so here I am!

The first thing I MUST comment on is the semi-colon. I always notice them because they're so infrequently used and seemingly so difficult for most to get right, but you killed it...even if this particular semi-colon was relatively innocuous (I think). As they say: "Each semi-colon brings up closer to the top..."

Anyhow, the legitimately most amazing thing about this chapter was the descriptions. Seriously, I need to discover the fountain from which you draw these things because you're so talented at setting a scene and giving us just enough detail to be there and feel it, but not so much that it robs us of the opportunity to imagine elements for ourselves.

As far as the plot goes, I thought you did an excellent job of advancing the story here while still advancing Roxanne (NOT Rose, like I so foolishly put in my first review :p) as well. That's a difficult thing to do when you're dealing with a mystery because there's this incredible temptation to dial in so deeply into the procedure and planting seeds you'll later need and little discoveries that the character can get lost when that person is also an investigator of sorts. But you didn't permit it. By focusing on Roxanne's learning and her relationships with people present as well as pouring the concrete you showed us important parts of her current incarnation - observant, instinctive, determined, hopeful, professionally insecure.

I can't help but wonder if the latter made her misinterpret completely the propriety of her question. It can be read in a number of ways, and I suppose the story bears it out, but I think when you're dealing with authority figures, often the question that doesn't get answers is the most important one and that seemed to show in the tone and delivery of the response she received. So I hope Roxanne realizes that and doesn't shy away and turn into a pack-follower in the future. After all, the greats always find a way.

Anyway, I can't wait to see how this develops - I'm on the Chapter 3!

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Review #12, by StarFeather Piece #4

31st August 2015:
#Last Spurt @ Review NaNo 5/ 21

Hi, Sian. I came back to your Roxanne. The fame that she was also a member of Weasleys seemed to be her burden, but at the same time the name may be her tool for interviewing people for her report. I reckon she wants to stand by herself but reality is she is still a nameless reporter. I could understand how she felt optimistic when the young works stopped to answer her questions. It’s very hard to attract the other’s attention especially when you’re on work.

The description about Archie, you compared to a golden Labrador, is interesting. I felt happy for Roxanne when she succeeded in pulling information from the young workers. Your description of the two was excellent, too. I visualized each character in my mind and enjoyed her questioning them.

Then you inserted the scene of torture. I wonder how you visualized the scene. Have you ever written about the crime scene before? I think it’s well written. I wondered if the man who was punished was the missing man.

I smiled at the description George still called her pumpkin and there’re different vegetable names more. I learned you even say “Daughters today,” we have the similar expression here.

Thank you Sian for sharing your imagination filled with love towards George and Angelina. I could imagine how George became a father and I became happy to find the mischievousness remained inside him. You infused your picture of George's family with life.

Still the question why Fred and Roxanne argued over something isn’t answered. I’ll be back at the next chapter!


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Review #13, by Randomcships Piece #16

31st August 2015:
I saw you'd updated and I just sped over to the latest chapter and I liked this chapter. It felt a bit filler cos there wasn't as much action as the previous chapters but in a good way like sitting down after a bit of a jog. I feel like it was good because we got lots more information about the mysterious potion. I really love how you set the stage and your characterization of Dominique is quite unique and very consistent. Roxanne is my favorite next-gen character and I really love that not much has been going her way for quite a bit of this story because it makes it a lot more compelling and I like how well you've set the stage so the answer isn't immediately obvious but give just enough information at just the right times to keep us guessing. Also, just wanted to say this, I love how throughout this entire story, your characterization of all the characters has remained consistent and your spelling and grammar was nothing short of on point.

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Review #14, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Piece #8

30th August 2015:
Back for Piece #8! Also, congrats on your latest update, it's always satisfying to be able to post a new chapter. My goal is to be able to get to the point where I can be the one to leave the first review on a new chapter-- we'll see how I do, depending on your writing speed and my reading speed, but there you have it ;)

You continue to do such a nice job with your portrait of the life of a journalist. I'm not a professional journalist or anything, so I can't exactly critique you on that, but I do continue to enjoy the little details you tack onto various parts of Roxanne's job. When you mentioned the reactions of Upton's friends to her digging, I really felt like I understood her predicament. And when you described Roxanne churning out an article even though it had no new information and was pressing a point that she didn't really believe in, I felt like I got a little bit of a look into the way that the media can push things out of proportion.

A pretty minor point-- when Roxanne is talking to her dad about his business, part of the dialogue was oddly repetitive. First, he mentions something about Bonfire Night then jumps to Skiving Snackboxes, but then a moment later, he jumps back to Bonfire Night as if he hadn't already mentioned it. I don't know if that's just something that popped up because you wrote the conversation in more than just one sitting, but as a reader, it feels a little disjointed.

Overall, I think you handled the family scene very well. That moment when George intervened, with the comment about how important family is, was a really poignant one. That said, I am a little confused by Fred's behavior. It seems very... blunt? I guess I'm surprised at how hostile he's being in a family setting. I'd imagine him to be a little more polite, for the family's sake-- for instance, being curt but not silent with Roxanne, and then, maybe when the parents leave the room, that's when he gets super surly and uncooperative. But I'm not exactly an expert on family feuds, and I still enjoyed reading it, so I guess I'm split.

I was SO nervous that Miranda had gotten to start covering Roxanne's story! And even now, as I assume the two disappearances truly are connected, I'm nervous that they're going to be competing for a single slot on a story. I'm also incredibly curious that you brought up blood status again... Either something very nasty is going on with these disappearances, or you're leading us in the wrong direction on purpose. :P

And WHAT is going on with that final scene? Gah, just when I think I'm on top of everything, you pop something else in. My first guess is that it has something to do with how odd Jane has been acting, and that Jane could be the young women in question. But that's pretty much a shot in the dark.

As always, I feel like I only have good things to say about your writing. Reading this story has been part of me slowly involving myself back in hpff after being pretty absent for awhile, and for the moment this is the only story on the site that I'm reading... Earlier today I found myself thinking, Gosh, I really can't wait to go and read the next chapter of Jigsaw! I'm honestly treating it like any physical book I'm reading, with me really looking forward to coming back to continue getting know the characters. So you should definitely know that you're doing something right here.

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Review #15, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Piece #7

25th August 2015:
Hi again! I'm back!

First off, I think it was really interesting that you had some Muggles be present at the crime scene. A small thing, I know, but I think I may have already mentioned that I find wizard-Muggle interactions fascinating, and this is just the sort of thing that makes a lot of sense; of course Muggle are going to stumble over wizard crimes from time to time. It was a nice touch.

It's also so cool the way you're weaving all of the Next Gen children into this! I love how Roxanne runs into her cousins wherever she goes-- it's done so much more subtly than the usual "The Potter-Weasleys run around Hogwarts together making mischief" stories. It's really interesting to see all the jobs you've dreamed up for them, and how they seem to get slowly pulled into this case no matter what.

Once again, you've done SUCH a good job portraying all the nuances of Roxanne's emotions. I feel like I get her so much. The way you have her thoughts jumping around when she talks to Dom, the guilt and the desire to solve the case all jumbling around... It's so good!

Yes, Dom thinks like I do! The jealousy scenario seems like a very possible one. Still, Jane's extended absences do seem a little odd.

I'm really curious about how Richard has been doing throughout this chapter. I was so frustrated when Roxanne didn't get the chance to respond to him before Mockridge came out! You're doing such a good job of continuing to bring back the smaller characters, and reinforcing their unique roles in the story. It makes the story that much stronger, having a familiar cast of supporting characters who pop up every now and then to really round out a scene.

Wow, that death ended up being extremely chilling. The "T" on the hand is just... frightening. Really reminiscent of the Dark Mark, even if it's on a victim instead of one of the attackers. Of course we, the readers, have understood for a little while now how dark this mystery really is, but seeing it through Roxanne's eyes makes it that much creepier. So, good job on taking what is almost old information for us and making it feel fresh.

A word on the first sentence of Roxanne's article: "The body that was yesterday discovered, washed up on Coombe Beach, nearby to the Armstrong residence, has now been formally identified as that of Mr Malcolm Peter Armstrong, aged 42 years." The sentence just seemed very... long. Lots of commas and all that. It was good in that it did what the opening line of an article is supposed to do, and introduces all the most relevant details in one go, but I feel like there could be a smoother way of writing that sentence. Something like, "Authorities have identified the body of Malcolm Armstrong, 42, which was discovered last night on a beach near his residence in town X"?

Gah, as if enough hadn't already happened in this chapter, now you bring up ANOTHER disappearance! No way! And this one's so odd as well... Who are Abbott's superiors, and why is she going against their wishes in reporting this? Why is she so upset? How is this connected to Armstrong? Ahhh.

Well, it was another extremely strong chapter, and I'm only getting more and more invested in the story as it continues. Great job!

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Review #16, by MargaretLane Piece #15

18th August 2015:
Poor Roxanne. Not that being single is necessarily a bad thing, but it seems like it's not what she wants at the moment. Personally, I think she is much, MUCH better off without Daniel, but it's obvious she doesn't see it that way. And losing a job is always upsetting. Probably not as catastrophic at 23 as it would be if she were ten years older, with children and a mortgage, but that's probably not much consolation at this point.

Good on Jane. Now that she knows what she wants, I hope it works out for her.

That really is a horrible dilemma to be in - she can't get a job without a reference and she really needs another job to get a reference.

Paul seems like a decent guy. He'd have every right to be annoyed about the way she ignored him. And I like the way he seems genuinely sympathetic about her break-up, regardless of his personal opinions.

And I'm really glad she's starting to see that while she made mistakes, it wasn't just her fault. She really had been glossing over Daniel's part in things and his faults to a point that was almost worrying. It was like she felt she had to apologise for his mistakes as well as her own. I hope she comes to realise that he has a few apologies to make - and some explanations to do to people like Fred about the fact he was wrong about her cheating - if they are to get back together. And at the moment, he doesn't even seem that invested in getting back with her, let alone willing to make amends.

When you refer to the teams they both support, you've written "he two teams" when it should be "the two teams."

Poor Roxanne. But I'm sure George at least will understand. After all, his own early career choices didn't exactly strike his mother as the best ideas. Sticking to the rules in order to please authority and keep your job isn't exactly something I'd see him being too concerned about.

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Review #17, by MargaretLane Piece #14

18th August 2015:
Roxanne's reaction to the ostentatiously upper-class ambiance reminds me a little of when we were in college (or "university") and we had some talk about post-graduate study in one of the staff areas and felt sort of out of place.

I LOVE the details about the limitations of the phones.

Coincidentally, the first chapter of my 3rd year story which I've recently posted has my characters talking about how Muggles should make a Quidditch computer game and stuff. And about how unused a lot of wizards are to Muggle technology.

Hmm, there's something odd about Prichard's reaction. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I'm sure it's relevant. His change of demeanor has to mean something.

OK, no, I really DIDN'T expect that ending. But it might turn out to be a good thing. She's now free to pursue what she wants to. And if she DOES get some information about these murderers, I'm sure the papers would be fighting to buy her story.

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Review #18, by MargaretLane Piece #13

18th August 2015:
Firstly, apologies for the delay on getting to this. I'm still catching up on fanfiction.

I wish this wasn't something that needed to be said, but I really like the way she isn't too enthusiastic about dressing up. So many stories act like dressing up to go out is the highlight of every woman's existence. And it annoys me when that doesn't seem to fit with anything else we've seen of the character.

I also really like the introduction of a character who hasn't had a boyfriend or girlfriend. And a couple of characters who are single.

And I don't see why Dominique can't stay single forever. Plenty of people do.

Molly seems to take after her dad in a lot of ways.

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Review #19, by rover_bond007 Piece #15

18th August 2015:
Thank you so much for updating, I love this story! Really enjoyed getting to know Paul Jordan - so far I like him much more than Daniel.
Looking forward to the next chapter :)

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Review #20, by magnifique11 Piece #15

17th August 2015:
I would like to preface this with saying I'm not much of a mystery reader. I like a good, classic mystery TV show, but I've never really gotten into the written stuff. That being said, I loved this. I read all of it in two nights which is saying something considering how busy my life has been lately.

I love Roxanne, but you've made me love her even more because the way you've written her as a next gen character is so compelling. She's frustrating and funny and wonderful and honestly you can't help but love her and root for her - which is basically the goal of writing. To get your reader to have an emotion connection with your character. I adore her and I want to be best friends with her.

So I just have to say this really quick since I've caught on to the brilliance of this story a bit late, when Jane was gone for all that time I was so scared that she would be the next victim. I was screaming at Roxanne to go and check her apartment and make sure she was okay. I was so happy when she was, omg. That was a huge relief.

The mystery btw, WOW. I can tell that you've spent some time thinking this through, it shows in a really good way because I feel just as lost as Roxanne right now and I'm itching to know what's really going on.

Thank you so much for sharing this story, it's so wonderful and I'm so excited for more.


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Review #21, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Piece #6

17th August 2015:
Haha, the cafe where Jane works is so gross. Like, you nailed that "unappealing" atmosphere right on the head. But it was also kind of funny. Like, who would ever want to spend time in a shop with a deaf, aggressive old woman who serves gray, lukewarm tea? Bleck.

I do feel a little bad for Jane. Roxanne's job situation, while (until recently) kind of dreadful, is at least understandable: as a reporter, you have to pay your dues with the small stories before earning the big ones. But being several years out of school, and splitting your time between working at an awful cafe and cleaning rooms at a bank? That's definitely not what anyone envisions for themselves several years out of school.

You're still doing a fantastic job with the whole Daniel thing. I really feel like I'm in Roxanne's skin when she's dealing with him: the awkwardness, the hesitation, the longing, the uncomfortable collision of the closeness of their past with the current distance between them... all of it feels so real. My first thought when she ran into him and he agreed to talk was, "Wait! If that happened to me, I'd be so flustered because this is spontaneous and I haven't had time to plan out my speech in my head yet!" And then I thought maybe I was getting a little too into it. :P Plus, I'm sure Roxanne has been going over what she wants to say for days.

I was SO happy when he said they could try to be friends. I know Roxanne's heart was a little broken all over again, but I was thrilled. It has to be a step in the right direction, right?

And fantastic job on the end of the chapter. It makes it that much more exciting that this development happened when Daniel and Roxanne were together, and that they're even Apparating to the scene together! Lovely job of bringing us back from Roxanne's personal life toward the main mystery too.

Don't think I'm going to forget about Jane, though... There's clearly something happening and while I don't feel like she'd directly connected to the disappearance, something funky is clearly happening.

Great job, as always!

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Review #22, by sunnyxxx Piece #15

17th August 2015:
Yay I actually like Paul! I also liked Daniel but can't be dealing with his behaviour towards Roxy right now haha. And I love Ashwar already, and as much as I wish Roxy could get her old job back at the Daily Prophet, I would happily settle for the Orcale, especially if it means we'll be seeing more of Ashwar and Amanda. Jane has a plan, so happy she is out of the slump she was in for a while there. Hoping things get better for Roxy soon too, her being fired was almost too much for me to handle.

Can't wait to see how the mystery plays out, update soon!

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Review #23, by StarFeather Piece #3

17th August 2015:
Hi, Sian!

Wow, you set various characters tightly intertwined through the press conference. Do you write the plan about multiple characters before starting to write? Like, who are Roxanne’s rivals, victims or boyfriend, or enemies or supporters.. And I wonder why Lily tried not to be aware of her like Fred. Will these questions be answered in the next chapter?

She can’t forget her ex- boyfriend Daniel. Is she going to find a new one? I guess you set more romance scene in the next chapters.

You mentioned Harry a little when you describe inside the Ministry. Is it common sense not to write about him in the fan fiction world? Because I read somewhere in the review on my story that it’s wiser to avoid the main Canon character to put in the story. I just want to know.

I’m getting one of Roxanne’s supporters, so I feel happy each time she succeed in doing pertinent remark at the press conference, and she’s getting the link to the circle of front page reporters, and I guess she’ll find important facts later, it’s very thrilling.

One more question, you use the present tense. Is it popular writing style?


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Review #24, by StarFeather Piece #2

14th August 2015:
Hi, Sian.

I read the chapter 1 and came here. The actress who played Guinevere at bbc Merlin on the banner as Roxanne, it’s very fascinating, too.

I always love the description of the sea air and the coldness. To begin with the description of nature surrounded her is a good start to write about her expectation and fear for her first proper job as a journalist. Then you set her as a third person who observed the scene, which led us to the story naturally.

You revealed one of her talents, a talent for remembering names and faces, which will be a key to solve the problem later, won’t it?

I didn’t feel bored at the battle of reporters who tried asking the important question to solve the problem, waiting for Roxanne to do it with much expectation. Readers surely want her to perform great deeds. I waited for the moment holding my breath. Then I felt disappointed with her and wished Daniel would do something for her. Each description of their movement of emotion is marvelous, even beautiful. It’s very heartbreaking to read the sentence, “For the second time in a month, I look on as Daniel Finch disappears from my life.”


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Review #25, by Roisin Piece #2

13th August 2015:

I really love how you offer such a nuanced analysis of The Press here. Like, there's a lot to be examined, and you haven't simplified it into any one thing. Canon was /very/ critical of news media, to say the least, but journalism is also really important and often quite a noble pursuit. I like how you've shown all sides of it here. There ethical and moral questions about how much probing is too much, there's the ambition of the individual journalists, there's the stuff about freedom of the press and its sovereignty from government (yet how that freedom also ruffles the Hit Wizards, since the questions aren't pre-approved). I think Roxanne's role in it is all quite sympathetic. While she does have ambition of her own, she definitely doesn't seem like she'd be comfortable compromising her ethics/morals.

Ooh ooh ooh I'm so curious about the disappearance. So many wee threads have been introduced already, and I can't help but suspect that a few of them might be more important than meets the eye (like his job with the wizarding mobile phone industry thingie). I'm also feeling mildly suspicious about Miranda's absence since last chapter. Like, that might just be a plot convenience, but I also feel like there could be more of a story there. So yeah, as of yet, there's so many interesting details and I'm very curious what will end up happening :)

The introduction of Daniel was super well done, because I still have just as many questions about him! If not more, now that his occupation has been introduced. I take it that they were in a relationship, lovers at the very least, but I have no idea how that could have intersected with the Freddie drama. HmMmMmMm.

All in all, this turning out to be such a well crafted mystery! The characters are all so interesting and the scenes are wonderfully rendered and there's a fantastic amount of detail.

Another great chapter!


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