Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.





  
79 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Slytherin Eagle Chocolate

24th October 2015:
This chapter was pretty good, it really got the family dynamics flowing well.

Only thing that I noticed was this: 'accidentally sat on in'; the in should be it.

Poor Rose, what a surprise for her!

Ah, now you have tied the title into the story once again with that sneaky little mention of chocolate.

Lea

Author's Response: Hmmm... I'll have to fix that one up if I edit again! Thank you!

It is a bit of a shock to poor Rose, I really can't give her a break can I? :P

Haha I'm glad you picked up on that! xD

Thanks for the review!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #2, by Slytherin Eagle Chilli

23rd October 2015:
Hi!

I like the idea of using the flavours for titles (I kinda wish I'd come up with it, I'm so super-duper impressed by it), it's very different.

The first thing I noticed that was off is the line 'groomsman in my wedding'. I'm not sure but it seems to me like it should read as 'groomsman at my wedding'.

I'm so glad you included this chapter as it really added some depth to each character. I especially enjoyed the part when Rose attacked Dom.

Lea

Author's Response: Thanks! I love stories that have themed chapter titles, so I thought I'd give it a go myself! It's actually a lot harder than I originally thought though!

Thanks for picking up on things! Unfortunately, sometimes things do just get missed! :)

I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #3, by Slytherin Eagle Introduction

23rd October 2015:
Hey there, it's Lea again with another review for our exchange.

I think this story has some really great potential. The line 'My name is Rose Weasley, and where the hell is my happily ever after?' really hooks the audience in for the story.

I like how the Beans are a feature throughout the story, and I hope that this will continue in future chapters, not just the titles.

I'll see you over at the next chapter!

Lea

Author's Response: Hi again!

I'm glad you're liking BBEFB! It's definitely a great deal different than my one shot that you also read xD

The beans do continue throughout the story, sometimes just a bit more obvious than other times!

Thank you for the review!


 Report Review

Review #4, by Misty_Rey Sweet and Sour

27th September 2015:
Damn, woah. I wasn't expecting that twist. I'm officially conflicted and that is a real testament to you.

I was excited to finally see Lorcan and ready to burn him at the stake. To some degree, I still do. I even considered that maybe he'd sent Lysander there out of cowardice (sidenote: will we ever meet Lysander?) but his explanation really threw me off and now I don't know what to think. It's still wrong, what he did to Rose but his reasoning for it was... somewhat reasonable? It made sense that he would feel overwhelmed and trapped. I didn't realise they were so young. 19 years old? No wonder he panicked. They were just a couple of stupid kids rushing into marriage. Interesting that he and Dom aren't together. I don't 100% believe him but for now, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. I don't believe that he and Dom didn't fool around behind Rose's back either. Something tells me they might still end up together but I hope not. I'd much rather have him alone in some faraway forest tracking down Nargles or Blibbering Humdingers.

Was he being selfish and self-centered? Yes but so was Rose, truth be told.

My first impression of Rose from the first chapter really came out in full force here. From what Lorcan was saying, she did seem to idealise their relationship and didn't really see it for what it was. They went too fast and ultimately crashed and burned. Maybe if they had taken the time to sit down and have a real heart-to-heart, maybe Lorcan wouldn't have taken such desperate measures. But then we wouldn't have this great story so no regrets ;). More than anything else, Lorcan did the best thing he could have done. He gave Rose closure and now she can move on. Although a small, tiny part of me wanted to see Rose curse him so that he'd never sit down properly (that made me chuckle).

I hope she doesn't move on too fast though. What happened to her was not okay and even if she fakes being okay, it's okay that she's not okay. It isn't something she can just brush aside and be all fine about it. She's still in the recovery stage so it'd be interesting to see her make a few mistakes along the way.

Please show Rose working in Honeydukes soon, I'm oddly excited by it. Like Rose, I myself have an insatiable sweet tooth and am a chocolate fiend.

Don't think I've mentioned this but you have fantastic pacing. Most authors try to cram a lot into one chapter. I am guilty of this too. Yours is very natural, I really like how every chapter usually only has one or two scenes but those scenes always pack so much of a punch without drowning the reader.

I more than enjoyed this drama-filled chapter! Keep the drama coming, in fact!

~Misty

Author's Response: I am so happy that you enjoyed this chapter. I put off writing it for so long because I really wasn't sure about it.

Lorcan was really hard to write. He's really just a confused kid... but at the same time, what he did to Rose was not okay at all.
And poor Rose... well, she's still a bit naive! There may be an opportunity for him to be cursed in the future though ;)

There will be quite a few ups and downs for her to still go through to fully recover. I hope it comes off naturally. She will be at Honeydukes very soon! I hope it lives up to expectations!

I'm really glad you like the pacing. I often worry that I'm just going through things so quickly!

Oh, and Lysander will eventually pop up, but probably not for a few chapters.

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for all these amazing reviews!


 Report Review

Review #5, by Misty_Rey Toast

27th September 2015:
This is honestly one of the best incarnations of Scorpius I've ever read. He's so refreshingly unique. I love how reasonable, logical, blunt and straightforward he is. The small bursts of sarcasm were great too. He seems like the perfect embodiment of a Ravenclaw which makes it even more curious that he's a Slytherin. He's even a bookworm, judging by all the books in his apartment. I could go on and on about him, he might even have replaced Lily as my favourite character in this story.

Rose in Scorpius' apartment was hilarious. The way she reacted to being in a strange room evoked Hermione in my mind for some reason. She is still her own person with her own personality but grabbing a book for a weapon, hilarious! And her realising that said book could really only belong to someone from Hogwarts and feeling all the more dumb for it had shades of Ron.

It was a good call to slowly introduce us to different next-gen characters as the story progressed. Interesting choice to have James be the one to wait at Rose's apartment for her to come back. I assumed it would be Albus or Lily. It seemed random at first but when he said he was also there to collect Lorcan's things, it all made perfect sense. It really shows that you have a good eye for detail and have really given serious thought to how threads in this story are coming together. It added another layer, a new reveal in Rose and Lorcan having actually lived together.

The Rose/Scorpius/James clash was amazing and served as a great showcase for each character. Rose trying to weasel (heh heh) her way out of trouble while Scorpius blurted out the truth with little to no regard of the consequences. Scorpius came out on top in that argument, sorry James. He really schooled James there.

Oh, almost forgot. Rose's mental checklist of what she still had was perfect.

This particular chapter shows real growth in your writing from the previous chapters. You've gotten more comfortable and confident and it really shows in your descriptions and dialogue, both spoken and Rose's inner monologues.

Keep it up!
~Misty

Author's Response: Wow. Thank you!
I am so glad you liked him! I've had his character planned out for ages, before even writing this story, so I am really so glad that you liked him so much!
He is definitely not a typical Slytherin!

She is quite a bit of a mix between her too parents! Maybe more Ron-like, but there's still some Hermione there!

Thank you! I have so many characters for this story, so I'm just trying to ease them together and hopefully not make it too confusing!
So glad you liked the clash! It was a lot of fun to write!
And yep, Scorpius totally did win that :P

Thank you! This fic is definitely a big learning experience for me and I'm so glad you're enjoying it!


 Report Review

Review #6, by Misty_Rey Rum

27th September 2015:
A good lesson for Rose, always follow your instinct. When it tells you to stay home, you stay home. It makes sense for Lily and Cece to pretty much drag her out of her apartment to attend the engagement party. Still, she conducted herself fairly well, aware of the unwanted attention and accepting it as part and parcel of her position and screwed-up situation.

In any war, there are always sides to take. I like the approach you took here, making Victoire and Bill firmly in team Dom even if she was totally in the wrong. Gotta love Ron though. He was a great father but still true to character. Fiercely loyal with a hot temper to boot. Him yelling at the party and at Lorcan and Dom made me cheer. That's exactly how I imagined he would react upon seeing the people who ruined his beloved daughter's life.

I also really enjoyed the insights into Rose's past relationship with Lorcan. I mentioned in one of my other reviews that I liked how you fastforwarded through the Hogwarts romance but I do hope you'll keep showing pieces of their time at Hogwarts together and how their love triangle with Dom developed over time. These snapshots will reinforce what Rose lost and make her journey to recovery even more satisfactory.

Now how did Rose's platinum-haired knight in shining armour end up in a skeevy muggle bar? ;) I was certain you would have him show up at the engagement party and try to chat up Rose so this was an unexpected turn.

~Misty

Author's Response: She probably should've just stayed at home! Things would've been a lot easier for her then. But, I'm not that nice to her unfortunately :/

I'm glad you like the interesting family dynamic. Dom was in the wrong, but being her sister/father, they want to be as loyal to her as possible.
I'm really glad you thought Ron was true to character! I was so stressed writing about him. I'm a big fan of canon, and so I really wanted the trio and Ginny to seem believable.

I'm honestly not sure if I will have any flashbacks to their past, but I have been thinking about it!

Well, he had to turn up at some point :P

Thank you for the review!!


 Report Review

Review #7, by Misty_Rey Chocolate

27th September 2015:
Can I just say that I immediately loved Lily from the second she showed up? I thought Rose would be my favourite, she usually is in any next-gen story, but you've breathed new life into Lily. What a spunky sprite! Every piece of dialogue out of her mouth and every action was awesome! The bit with her staying true to her word and blasting down the door was genius. She's like a more fired-up version of Ginny from the books. I really hope we see more of Lily and her foolhardy, crazy ways ;)

Poor Rose. The aftermath of her ordeal has really left her a mess, as it should. You really captured her at rock bottom, I could see the disgusting, smelly apartment and her unbathed state. Honestly, I don't blame her one bit. Who has time to clean and shower when your life has fallen to pieces?

Albus' news was a real kick in the teeth. I thought he was going to say that Alice was pregnant but it's definitely more painful to make them engaged instead. It forces Rose watch their fairytale romance unfold and compare it to hers which ended disastrously. It will make for an interesting contrast to see Rose deal with her best friends' happiness as she tries to reenter the real world.

~Misty

Author's Response: So glad you loved Lily!
She is so much fun to write! I really love her character. I do see her as being a lot like Ginny, but instead grew up quite privileged, so is a bit more over the top!
She will keep popping up, I like her too much for her to not to!

Haha, that's exactly the right question! Who has time for that stuff? I probably wouldn't after going through what she has!

Yeah... poor Rose. I kind of just kicked her while she was down. But, things have to get worse before they get better, right?

Thank you very much for the review!


 Report Review

Review #8, by Misty_Rey Chilli

27th September 2015:
So glad you decided to include this chapter! I honestly really wanted to know what happened on Rose's wedding day. It was everything I had hoped for, painful, heart-wrenching, confusion. Basically everything Rose was feeling in that second paragraph: 'My palms grew cold and clammy as I stood there. I had no idea what was happening, no idea what to do. I felt like fainting, throwing up and bursting into tears all at the same time.' Great piece of writing here, just so raw and real.

It was heartbreaking that she kept hoping Lorcan would realise he had made a mistake and would turn around and resume their impending perfect life together. You did a great job building on Rose's state of mind. Her vulnerability was in full display.

Oh man, when Dom showed up, all I could think about was Rose should punch her in the face. And like you read my mind, Rose tackling Dom to the ground was brilliant! Honestly, Albus should have stayed out of the way. Let them fight! :D Even more amazing than that was when you described Dom as an ugly crier. It was a small but important touch, to show she wasn't a perfect beautiful part-veela. It humanised her even if it didn't redeem her.

If I could maybe make one suggestion? Their parting words to each other were great but maybe you could replace the word 'cousin' to 'family'? It's a lot more venomous and powerful, denouncing family. That's just my opinion though.

Also, in the 9th paragraph, I personally feel it isn't necessary to mention that Rose is the daughter of Ron and Hermione, part of the golden trio etc etc, since this was already mentioned in the previous chapter.

These are just small suggestions though and doesn't distract too much from the story. Like I said before, you've done a great job laying down the foundation of what will hopefully turn out to be a great story.

~Misty

Author's Response: Thank you!
I'm quite glad I decided to include it as well, even though it was quite heart-breaking to write! I'm so happy that you liked it and could sympathize with Rose.

Yep, I couldn't just let Dom get away with it! Though, she probably did deserve more than one hit... but she's still Al's cousin too, and I don't think he'd like seeing his two cousins beating each other up (even if she deserved it!)!

Oooohh, that's a good idea! If I ever edit this chapter again, I will make sure to fix those two things!


 Report Review

Review #9, by Misty_Rey Introduction

27th September 2015:
Congrats for putting out such a quality fanfic, especially since it's your first one. :)

That beginning was what really caught me by the throat and made me want to keep reading. It's really cool that you took what is an essentially cliched romance and turned it on its head. Everyone roots for the two main lovers in the romance but what about the girl that was essentially a side character, merely a stepping stone, an obstacle for the destined lovers to overcome. It was a gut-punch beginning in the best way possible, being left at the altar while watching the person who was supposed to be the love of your life marry your cousin. It instantly made me want to know how Rose got to that point.

I didn't mind that you zipped through their Hogwarts romance fairly quickly. There were enough details that enabled me to picture Rose and Lorcan's relationship as well as Dom and Lorcan.

I could also get a sense of Rose's character, which I liked. Feisty, stubborn, a little naive and in denial, she pursued Lorcan and struck up a relationship with him eventhough deep down she knew his heart belonged to Dom.

All in all, this was a great introduction. I'm really intrigued to find out where you're taking this story.

~Misty

Author's Response: Thank you so much for these amazing reviews!
I don't even know how to properly reply!

That was essentially why I wrote the story. I'm a huge fan of rom-coms, but the cynical side of me always thinks of the other characters that get forgotten about so that the main characters get their happy ending. So this was my opportunity to *maybe* (can't give anything away! :P) give the other guys a chance.

I did go through it pretty quickly, so I'm really glad it didn't put you off!

Rose's character is definitely interesting, she tends to have a few mood swings... but I guess, who wouldn't in her situation?

Thank you!


 Report Review

Review #10, by Ray Sweet and Sour

26th September 2015:
This was unbelievably good. Can't wait to read how Rose starts to deal with her pain, and how Scorpius comes into all of this. Eagerly waiting for your next update!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for reviewing!
Hopefully the next chapter won't be too far away!


 Report Review

Review #11, by Diana Hanson Sweet and Sour

26th September 2015:
This keeps popping up in queue as if you added a new chapter and I am disappointed! You must be updating or revising. Please find the time to add more...I am intrigued and cannot wait to see how this story unfolds. I do believe that Lorcan is correct. He actually did Rose a favor. Her fairy tale awaits her!

Author's Response: I'm really sorry! I did put up an edit shortly after the new chapter, but the queue's a bit unpredictable, so it appeared a few days later instead!
But, from now, my new chapters will go through my beta reader before I update, so the story won't keep popping up with edits and being misleading.

The next chapter is pretty much finished. Hopefully I'll get it up soon!
I think he did her a huge favour too ;)



 Report Review

Review #12, by peacock33 Sweet and Sour

25th September 2015:
So great to see an update. I love this story! I have to say that Lorcan came off badly to me here. While he claimed he wasn't trying to blame Rose, that is pretty much the basis for all of his explanation/excuses - you changed, you were too into the spotlight/media, you wouldn't let me fulfill my dreams, etc. While problems in relationships involve both people making mistakes, he basically didn't take any responsibility for what happened. And his running off with Dom when she said she loved him was beyond cruel and selfish. I'm glad you are trying to make him 3-D and not just an evil villain, but I still find him a selfish, immature jerk and hope that Rose can realize she is better off without him (the one thing he did say that was true was that he actually did her a favor by not having her be married to him). I also don't buy him and Dom being just friends. Walking in holding hands is more than just being friends. If they don't want to hurt Rose and want to just be friends, I don't understand why they think it would be a good idea to walk in like that when they know it will just make people more upset with them, even if Rose hadn't been there.
I agree with other reviewers that Rose has to grow up and she probably did make mistakes in her relationship with Lorcan, I hope that she can start moving on. I do hope she can forgive and not hold onto damaging anger and hate forever, but I kind of hope she doesn't reconcile with Dom and Lorcan beyond just forgiveness and indifference. Or if she does ever becomes become friends with them again that it at least takes a long time and they actually change into better people that she would actually want in her life - they just aren't right now. Can't wait to see how things progress!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this honest review!
I had been stressing about putting this up for quite a while (hence why I haven't updated in so long), so I did realise it wasn't perfect!

I'm sorry that you thought Lorcan came off badly to you. He was really quite hard for me to write. He is trying to explain his side to Rose, and poor Rose is quite a bit naive to believe it. I was trying to not made him a simple 'bad guy' that is completely evil (after all, Rose was in love with him for ages), but at the same time I am completely aware that his excuses aren't really good enough. And, like you say, Rose definitely has a bit of growing up to do before she can see what she really deserves, she's still quite naive at this point.
I hope some of this makes sense... It should be cleared up a bit in one of the upcoming chapters I have. I might have to come back and fix this one at some point though!

Thank you very much for reviewing!


 Report Review

Review #13, by notreallyblonde44 Rum

5th September 2015:
Hi! Ellie from the Pit reviewing your story whilest reading Silver Scales noms.

Blonde hair!! Scorpius there or Lysander???

To go back through the chapters, you create nice tension, build up, and characterization in this story. I see everyone so clearly in my mind, their personalities believable and distinct. I feel awful for Rose, but you added a second layer of the tension because originally Lorcan was Dominique's (if you believe in ownership and possession and "code" when it comes to Love, which who knows if that holds weight. clearly not in this story ha). I've actually been in a somewhat similar situation (no engagement or wedding though, yikes too young hah) but still it is just awful! I feel for everyone but Lorcan. I hate him and his dumb-dumb lack of integrity. I hope he kicks a swift kick.

I love Ron's emotions at the party, it was so protective Ron! Idk why, maybe I'm in a weird emotional place, but I almost teared up with his reaction and love for his daughter. Very in-character adult Trio characterizations too.

Oh, also, really like the theme of the story, with the chapters being different flavors of Bertie Beans it's a great wizariing-relevant analogy. We haven't actually seen her at the shop, so I assume that's coming. I'm hoping Rose feels better as the story progresses!

xx, Ellie

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review Ellie!

Yeah, there's not really a 'code' in this story. Well, not for Rose in that situation anyway!
Sorry to hear you've gone through something similar! I hope it all worked out in the end for you.

I am so glad you like the trio's characterisations. It was so difficult for me to write them as I've never written about canon characters before, and I really like keeping things to canon!

The shop is coming quite soon actually.

Again, thank you so much for reviewing!!


 Report Review

Review #14, by pottered  Toast

31st July 2015:
Aww ohmygod i /love/ scorpius
absolutely /adore/ him

Author's Response: So glad that you like Scorpius!
He's still a bit of a mystery at the moment, so it will be a lot of fun exploring his character throughout the story!

Thank you so much for the reviews!!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #15, by pottered  Rum

31st July 2015:
omg trust ron to make a scene, that was hilarious to me for some reason .-.
and lorcan and domi -_- i just.,.,don't have words tbh
and aww scorpius here to save the day

Author's Response: Haha yeah. Poor Ron, he just couldn't help it!
I think I would feel his anger too in his situation though!

Thanks for the review!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #16, by pottered  Chocolate

31st July 2015:
Aww albus is sooo cuteee
And omg lily, i love her character!

Author's Response: So glad you love the two youngest Potter's! They are a lot of fun to write!
Thank you!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #17, by pottered  Chilli

31st July 2015:
i /sooo/ understand rose's anger at domi. im, also, really /really/ glad rose unleashed her anger on her lol i mean OK domi loves lorcan, but should've declared that before the wedding was planned or, like, way back when rose and lorcan weren't engaged. im so sad for rose):
ok im gonna stop ranting now and read the next chapter eep

p.s. i really like this story aha

Author's Response: I usually never support violence at all, but I do admit... Dom sort of had it coming, and Rose is her father's daughter after all!

So glad you're liking the story!
Thank you!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #18, by pottered  Introduction

31st July 2015:
aww rose ):
this was so bittersweet, like, it's suppose to be a bit lighthearted I guess and also: I can just tell rose is a cutie but still ): i feel so bad for her.

P.S. domi and lorcan: FIGHT ME

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review!!
Poor Rose, I really was quite mean to her in this first chapter, wasn't I?!

Haha, I feel like that about Dom and Lorcan often too ;)

Thank you!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #19, by Infinityx Toast

28th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Slytherin

YES GIVE ME MORE SCOROSE ESPECIALLY WHEN SCORPIUS IS PERFECT LIKE THAT YES YES. I love him in case you didn't notice. but i really hope rose grows up a bit more if they're going to be together. he seems so composed and mature while she's a kid who doesn't know anything about life and can't think with a straight head. ugh. okay, you should know, such a reaction means i am completely invested in your characters and you're doing an amazing job.

Rose just seems like this spoilt kid who's living off her parents' money and just needs everything to go perfectly and in her own way. as much as i hate dom for doing what she did, i'm not that sympathetic towards rose because come on woman grow up a little. okay, sorry. but scorpius tho. amazing. so caring and so thoughtful. yes, he needs to keep a firm hand with rose. geez, she's in someone else's house and demands bacon because she doesn't like toast. crazy much?

i love that the whole family was looking for her. and the way you described ron and his vein. brilliant. i want more of ron's vein. just make sure he doesn't burst it.

and the ending. gosh, she overreacted a lot but i get it. and scorpius is just a darling. DID I TELL YOU I LOVE HIM? I LOVE YOUR SCORPIUS. he deserves a better rose though please make her better. can't wait to see the development of the plot and characters!

Author's Response: Oh my goodness! I really never expected in a million years to get a reaction like this for one of my characters! Thank you so much!

Rose does need to grow up quite a bit. While I crushed her dreams in the first chapter, she's still holding onto that naivety that everything will/should be perfect a little. There's definitely a bit difference between Scorpius and her at the moment!

Haha. The vein may have to make a comeback!

I am so happy you like Scorpius! I think I've had a few mixed reactions to him. He is quite mature and a bit distant, we really don't know much about him and his life at all. But I am so excited to develop his character (and Rose's of course) further!

Thank you so so so so much for all these wonderful reviews!!
The next chapter is with my beta at the moment, I really can't wait to see your reaction to it... it's quite drama filled.

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #20, by alicia and anne Introduction

28th June 2015:
House cup 2015 Slytherin

I was instantly intrigued by the banner, title AND the summary! This is going to be a great story! I can tell already and I am exctired to read more.

Oh wow, I wasn't expecting that twist at all. I wasn't expecting it to be her cousin walking down the aisle instead of her. Now I'm demanded where her happy ever after is too!!

I loved the little pieces of background that you had in this chapter, and her history with Lorcan and how they began dating. And I loved that you wrote how their dates had gone.

I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?! I need to know how she got to that moment, and if she's going to know what to do with her life. More importantly, I want to know What caused them to break up the engagement? Are they still on good terms? Or can they not stand the sight of each other now?

Brilliantly written! I can't wait to read more of your wonderful and beautiful work! You are so talented

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review!
I'm really glad you like the story and the background details! I was worried it would be quite a bit wordy and too detailed for an introduction, so I'm glad that you liked reading the history with Lorcan and that it makes you want to know what happens next!

Thank you

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #21, by Infinityx Rum

28th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Slytherin

whoo i knew she'd go to the party! but the way the whole family is divided is really distressing. i would honestly love to read a fic with dominique's side of things. i mean, obviously she was smitten with lorcan from the very beginning and it was so immature of her to tell rose to stop dating him when she didn't try to date him herself. going out with a lot of other guys is hardly the best way to deal with such a situation. i love how lily and cece are such good friends to rose, not to mention, al and alice. i loved that light-hearted moment when alice was teasing albus and they were all such a happy little group. so dom and lorcan did show up, holding hands as well. sweet salazar how low a level can a person stoop to? i'm really not liking dom here. although ron's reaction was definitely priceless and so in character. from the way he commented on the dress to his anger at dom and lorcan - i love him. oooh, and the ending. i love the way you've written drunk rose, i could picture the way she spoke and everything. and a blonde stranger huh? could it be scorpius? i'm going to read on and find out! great job here. :)

Author's Response: Maybe one day I will write a one-shot from Dom's point of view. She does have an interesting story and her own reasons for things (whether or not they actually are good reasons).

I'm glad you liked Ron, it was so hard for me to try and write the adults and make them seem believable/themselves. So it really does mean so much to me that you thought he was in character!

Hmm... it could be him? :P

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #22, by Infinityx Chocolate

28th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Slytherin

Oooh character progress. i like the way the story is building up. rejection, isolation, recovery, and a new start - that's the required format and i love the way yours is going at the moment. and of course, all the complications along the way. so much JUICY DRAMA, yes, i need more. xD poor rose though. binge eating and yelling at rom com actors is definitely the way to get past this, i totally approve. xD i love lily in this. her flair for the dramatic and persistence and caring nature just add to such a strong, likeable character. as a matter of fact, i love how tightly knit all the cousins are and i'm really interested to see how the dynamics of that relationship would have changed after dom did what she did. especially if she's going to the engagement party, i'm so curious to know how her cousins would treat her. and i'm certain rose is going to go for this since the plot has to progress and i CAN'T WAIT FOR THE DRAMA YO. great work here. :)

Author's Response: That is the general format of the story (with a few repeated steps here and there!). So glad you are liking how the story is progressing, there's definitely a lot of drama!

So happy you love Lily, she's such a blast to write! Definitely a strong in-your-face kind of person. I imagine her to be a lot like Ginny, but by growing up with a very famous family, there's a bit of an over-confidence to her!

It will be interesting seeing how the family-dynamic changes!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #23, by Infinityx Chilli

28th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Slytherin

oh my what an intense, angsty chapter. i love it. :D okay, this is turning out to be quite the drama and i love the way it's progressing at the moment. i still stand by my earlier assessment of this being a story of rose finding her identity in a way and i can't wait to find out how that goes. your characterization of her is so different in this than any other story i've read and it's quite refreshing. she's not the overly smart and calculating type here - she's a typical young girl with rampant feelings and reckless behaviour. the way she picked a fight reminded me a lot of ron so that's amazing. :D
eek how could her own cousin do this to her that's just awful. i mean, if dom and lorcan loved each other then lorcan shouldn't have even proposed to rose in the first place. stupid children. ah, your writing is able to evoke such strong emotions and that's so great, you're off to a wonderful start in this fic. i also love how you're gradually introducing new characters. Albus and Alice - that's just lovely and i love it! i can't wait to see where this is going!

Author's Response: Haha! I have heard/seen on the forums that you're a big fan of angst! So I'm glad you enjoyed it!

I'm glad you find Rose's characterisation refreshing, I read a /lot/ of Next Gen stories, so it's tricky trying to stand out a bit! She definitely has quite a bit of Ron in her, which is so fun to write!

Yeh, Dom and Lorcan really aren't in the good books at the moment! I'm so glad I managed to get so many different feelings towards my characters (whether good or bad).
I'm really glad you like how I introduce characters. When I map it out, I actually have quite a lot of characters, so I'm trying really hard to not bombard everyone with them all!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #24, by Infinityx Introduction

28th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Slytherin

hello hello! i apologise in advance for how all-over-the-place this review is going to be and please excuse the lack of proper formatting and grammar. :P

ooh so rose and lorcan - that's a pairing i have never read before. i love the way this chapter starts of with this critical tone. it seems typical of a rose who is looking back and talking about her experiences. she seems to be able to look at things objectively, now that she's older. the young rose seemed so naive and expectant, and it's really sad how things turned out for her despite that. i don't think i could not care about her with the way you've portrayed her even though she was quite silly when she was younger, and that's great! making your readers care about your characters is a huge accomplishment and it's amazing the way you've done that. i love the way you've characterised her. it seems to me as if this is going to be a journey of her discovering her identity of sorts as well. i especially love how she works at honeydukes - that's a great bit of detail.

great first chapter, i'm moving on to the next!

Author's Response: No need to apologise for the grammar/formatting, my reviews got a bit crazy during the house cup, but yours are wonderful! I, honestly, had been putting off replying to these, just because they're so amazing that I just don't really know what to say!

I love that you already care about Rose, she is the heart and soul of this story! She really is quite naive... but I'm too mean to just let her live her happily ever after! :P She will definitely grow in this story, though there might be a few bumps along the way!

-Rosiful


 Report Review

Review #25, by pointless_proclamations Chilli

28th June 2015:
Rosiful,

You descriptions of Rose's emotions are amazing. Because of that, it's very easy to feel what she feels. That moment when she's just reflecting on all the plans they made together and how they weren't going to have that because of this one moment that changed that. . . super effective. Albus Potter, he's amazing. I love his character because it's as if his instincts are the same as mine what with the comforting this poor Rosie and being angered at Dom and Lorcan--nasty bunch. Dom is another matter entirely. One one hand, yay, she got the guy and all and she's with somebody she loves, but to hurt poor Rosie like that. Not nice. The hatred Rose feels for her is completely understandable. I mean, DID SHE NOT THINK ABOUT HER COUSIN? And Lorcan. I don't like Lorcan even though he was kind of sweet in the last chapter, but to lead Rosie on like that if he just really liked Dom was horrible of him and Rosiful, I just have many feelings right now. I AM EXCITED TO SEE HOW THIS CONTINUES ON. SO MUCH I MUST KNOW.

House Cup 2015 - Slytherin

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review!! It really puts a smile on my face every time I re-read it!

I love that you really like Albus, he is a bit of a sweetheart! It is a bit weird for him though, of course he is trying to comfort and support Rose and feeling very angered by Dom.. but she's still technically family!
I'm so happy I managed to evoke so many different feelings!

Thank you so much for this review!

-Rosiful


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>