Reading Reviews for The Fool's Journey
  
6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Pretense Of Perfection The Fool

28th July 2014:
Oh boy, I can't wait for you to update!!

I love all of the different characters you've incorporated into this story, especially Grindelwald. I like how he isn't portrayed as completely evil, and even helps Colin find his way through the forest.

The air of suspense and mysticism in the story is so perfect, and leaves me wanting more. I love that things aren't exactly as they seem, and I find myself wondering if they've all somehow been transported back in time? It seems to be more of an "old world" type of setting, but sometimes the more modern things throw my for a loop, like Colin's camera. Then again it seems like a big chunk of the characters died before the end of the war, except of course for Mcgonagall and Sybil. I just don't know!

And I love it. Please update soon!!

Author's Response: Hey again - thanks so much for coming back! :)

Ah, I'm so glad you like the characters - I'm enjoying introducing them slowly, as I usually introduce them all in one go, haha, so it's a bit strange for me. But yes, Gellert - things about him will come up, so you might change your opinion of him later on ;)

Ooh, well no, haha, not quite. I'm glad you like the mystery-sort of sense - I didn't really want to explain the whole world at the beginning, but information will come about the kind of world they're in, I promise! :) It is a bit of a weird AU, but hopefully it works out fine - I honestly really struggle to explain it to people, haha.

Thanks so much for the wonderful pair of reviews, and again for the challenge! :)

Aph xx

Aph xx


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Review #2, by Pretense Of Perfection Cassandra of Troy

28th July 2014:
Aw, reading this offered such insight to Trelawney's character and history.

I've only read a few other stories from her POV, but I think you managed to really capture her character in a way that no one else has. It's easy to see how and why she became the way she did, blurting out odd things and not caring what others think of her. I like how she truly does have the gift, but sort of alludes to her pretending it's easier if she just makes things up.

Her desire to be heard is so sad, especially since most people just look at her like she is crazy. I love seeing her early interactions with Dumbledore, and even McGonagall, as I imagine them both to treat her exactly as they did.

Awesome start, I can't wait to read more! It's going to be so hard choosing a winner for the challenge, everyone has such amazing stories.

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks so much for dropping by - and thanks so much for the challenge, it was such a fun thing to enter! :)

I really like Trelawney now - I always felt a bit sorry for her in the books because no one ever listened to her or took her seriously and, in the end, she was right. I'm so glad you like her - she's a bit irritating and a bit spacey, but so fun to write!

Yeah, I couldn't help the chapter title when I thought of how people ignore her :P I'm so glad you liked Dumbledore and McGonagall - they're gonna come up again, so I'm so happy you thought they were good!

Thank you so much for the great review! :)

Aph xx


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Review #3, by Iellwen The Fool

10th July 2014:
Me again ;)
House Cup 2014.

In my previous review, I forgot to mention two things;
1. I love your use of the cards Sybill uses and that you obviously know your Tarot (or researched it very well^^)
2. You're story's title is very endearing to me because of a little story told in a manga called Fruits Basket (by Natsuki Takaya) called the Foolish Traveler - anyway, that's just a side note to my personal feelings ^^ Having gotten to know your story's Fool a little, I can safely assume the one has nothing to do with the other :D In short; I like your title. ^^'


Colin is a Muggle; thinking of taking a picture and being surprised at Gellert's 'talent' yet not afraid (nor was he at the thought of running into wolves) and calmly asking for assistance instead of asking question after question - I can maybe start to see what some would call him a fool.

Aah Grindelwald - I love that Colin meets in a forest xD (because as you probably know, 'Wald' means 'Forest' in German ^^) and the he gets off with a wrong idea of Dumbledore because of Gellert's reaction!

I was a bit confused that Colin didn't understand how Gellert knew he was headed for the village... Because he just told him... "I need to get to the village. You canít leave me in the forest." :/ Maybe I misunderstood something, though xD

Also, is Dobby already working for the Kitchen of the castle in this story? :D I'm not complaining, just asking (and thinking of how cool it'd be for Dobby never to have worked for the Malfoys :D)

I really love the descriptions of the forest (is it the Forbidden one?^^) and the village - very vivid and detailed without too much unnecessary information that could bore a lazier reader or even worse, slow down the flow. Your descriptions are perfectly balanced! Leaving just enough wiggle room for the reader's own imagination without completely lacking a solid base.


Oooh, what has started? I need to know :D
I'll be looking forward to the next chapters!! I'm officially hooked!! :D

*Gee

Author's Response: Hey again! :) So great to see you back again!

Gah, thank you so much! I do actually have a set of Tarot cards, and a little book which explains them all in it, so most of the information on the cards and symbolism and all comes from there. Haha, no worries, thanks! I'm glad you like it - it just seemed so fitting given the Tarot theme that I had to use it! :P

Colin isn't a muggle, but in the books wandless magic is really hard to do and Gellert doesn't seem to have a wand in this scene, so that's more where the surprise came from (though I can totally see where you got that from - I might edit to make it more obvious...). But yeah, he is pretty foolish - not worried, very naieve... but he's so sweet to write, really! :)

Yes, haha! I'm so glad someone got that - I thought it was so ironic, given his name (I only speak a little German, though) so it seemed fitting, and the forest made it a lot easier settings-wise... and yeah, Gellert doesn't really help with that... poor Colin :P

Ooh, thanks so much for pointing that out! That is, in fact, a mistake, so I'll go back and change it asap! Thanks again! :)

Dobby in this is already working in the castle, yes. I haven't really decided if he ever worked for the Malfoys in this, as it's not overly important, but I might think on it later ;)

Gah, thank you so much! I write a lot of description so I'm always worried it's too much and bogging things down, so I'm so glad it works well! :)

Thank you so much for the lovely review, and I'm so glad you like this story - it's something of a guilty pleasure for me, haha.

Aph xx


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Review #4, by Iellwen Cassandra of Troy

10th July 2014:
Heya!
Here to spread Love and for the House Cup 2014 :D

I was a bit worried about reading this story at first, because I just got Trelawney as protagonist for a Challenge XD
But I'm relieved to read you are showing a different side of hers than what I'm planning on going for, so there's no way this would influence my writing. Well, there's little way. Well... I'll make sure to sway from your wonderful take on her ;)

I was a bit confused that Sybill already knows the name of James Potter and couldn't picture him looking grim (and that she alread, considering she was only hired in 1980 whereas the Potters were murdered in 1981, but that is such a tiny detail it might not be relevant for the progression of your plot ;)

I love that you had Trelawney and Dumbledore meet beforehand, under such tragic circumstances, too! That he didn't want to believe her before as he was a child, yet his sister died after she predicted it, makes it logical for him to pale at her last words in this chapter.
Albus is still young so... is she talking about Grindelwald? Her words were so full of mystery, I'm really curious about the next chapter!!
Also, I can't help but wonder why she considers herself so stupid, why she blames herself for letting 'The words' slip from her mouth like that! :D

I really love that she had recurring thoughts about her sherry yet not drinking in front of Albus and Minerva. Deep down, she knows it's wrong, that they'll not approve ^^

I absolutely adore that Sybill sees different kinds of future, the possibilities of lives, even her own!

I wonder who that fool is, the one that'll perhaps save them all as your summary states!
I have to read the next chapter!! ^^

*Gee

Author's Response: Hi there! :)

Haha, sorry about that (coincidental timing, much?)! I'm sure our takes on her will be different - mine ended up being surprisingly more sympathetic than I'd originally been aiming for.

Oh, yeah, this is AU, in a totally different world. I know it's not wholly obvious at first - it's a similar enough beginning that it could be set in the canon world, so don't worry about it. In this, she already knows him ;)

Gah, thank you! I'm so glad you liked it - yeah, I wanted them to meet and to give Dumbledore, who's so logical albeit whimsical a real solid reason for believing her about predictions, when so many others don't. Ooh, maybe, maybe ;) Yeah, that was kinda meant to be a sort of indication of the nature of prophecy - that when it comes upon her, she can't stop herself from saying things, they just come out. A lot of them aren't very happy, so she doesn't like it very much.

Haha, yeah, I had to include the sherry somehow! Though it's really very sad, tbh.

I loved writing the futures and the possibilities thing - it's such a cool thing to explore, I think. I'm so glad you liked it! :)

Gah, thank you so so much for this review - it was really, really lovely! :)

Aph xx


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Review #5, by HeyMrsPotter Cassandra of Troy

3rd July 2014:
Hi, Aph :D
This is definitely unlike any story I've read on the archives before, and I really loved it. It's not canon and yet it fits perfectly well with canon, very clever!

I really like the depth you've given to Trelawney. I always thought of her as an annoying character in the series, but I never thought she was a fraud, pretty much all of her predictions did come true in the books. You've definitely managed to change my feelings about her slightly though, I'm almost feel sorry for her! You write her really well though, the scattered thoughts and the love of sherry are small details but they speak volumes about her.

I love how you talk about her great-grandmother telling her Seers are sacred and that you've woven that in to your writing, telling the reader that she really believes it. Like this line here:
There had been no discernible symbol, no indication that it had happened for any other reason than her own human fallibility there's a hint of something that is almost smug, but not in a way that she looks down on those who can't See.

Another thing I liked was the use of the shorter, snappier, standalone sentences you used, they really help with the flow of the story, especially moving between the significant parts.

Young Dumbledore and McGonagall were great additions and again, you had their characters written perfectly. The little hints about Grindelwald were just brilliant, as were Dumbledore's reactions.

All in all, a really different and enjoyable one shot :)

Dee

Author's Response: Hey there! Thanks so much for stopping by! :)

Thank you so much! It is a weird, similar to canon-ish thing, particularly this beginning, although later on it won't be quite so canon-esque and the differences will be much more apparent, I promise! :)

Thank you so much! I'm so glad you like her - I know she's not a very popular character, but I always felt a little sorry for her, so the chance to explore her a little more and develop her further from what we see in the books was great! Yeah, I wanted her to be a bit... well, scatty because it's kinda like how she's written in the books, but also I wanted her to be human and I think it's the little failings and difficulties which make that, so I tried to emphasise the difficulties she has rather than the positives, if that makes sense.

Ah, I just had to mention the great-grandmother who was the famous Seer... I couldn't resist it :P But I couldn't really think of another character who would have been able to sort of teach her about her gift, you know? She is a bit smug at times, but it's a sort of lonely, almost bitter smugness which is lovely to write :)

I'm so glad you liked young Dumbledore and McGonagall - they're going to come up again! I loved putting the little hints in as to later on in the story - it's so much fun to put things like that in, particularly with prophecy and all that!

Thank you so much for the wonderful review! :)

Aph xx


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Review #6, by UnluckyStar57 Cassandra of Troy

2nd July 2014:
Hello, Aph! I promised I would review this, and I couldn't resist being the first to review. :)

Really, you've done it again. I can see all of the familiar elements of your writing that I love in House of Cards: the minute details that add so much to the story; the mysterious information that serves as foreshadowing; and the characters with all of their crazy politics. (I have a feeling that these characters are going to be slightly less pompous and evil as the Blacks are... maybe.)

Anyways, I mostly love how you've taken Sybil Trelawney and refashioned her into a Cassandra with more dark portents than her character in HP. She seems to be "the real deal" here; those flashes of different scenes that keep appearing in her Sight add to her validity. She definitely isn't written about much in fanfiction, at least, not when she's the main character. You're amazing for giving her a chance in the spotlight! :D

So, this story is an AU, and although it isn't overwhelmingly apparent, I can see it in a few of the details. Dumbledore certainly isn't as old as he is in canon, and that glimpse of his demise in "a different world" was just. So... Upside down and curious! It's like they're in the Wizarding equivalent of Wonderland, but they don't know it because they've been there all along... I don't know. :P

At least we know that one thing stays the same across the universes: Minerva McGonagall is still not Sybil's biggest fan. From the clues that you included in the narrative, I think that Sybil is probably older than Albus and Minerva. Why is there such dislike between the two women? Is it simply a matter of Minerva's intense dislike people who claim to have the Sight, or is there something else? And (I'm probably crazy, but...) am I mistaken in thinking that Minerva might have a crush on Albus?!

This chapter is frustrating in a brilliant way, because it raises questions that I can't know the answer to until much, much later. :P

And James Potter!! What's his face doing, showing up in the cards?! Hmmm... Is "the village" supposed to be Godric's Hollow? Are the three teachers at Hogwarts? Are they even teachers in this universe? Is it around the time when Voldemort is supposed to kill the Potters in the actual Potterverse?! I don't know, and I'm so curious! D:

Some of my favorite quotes, because I am totally in awe of you for writing things that sound this good in about 48 hours of NaNo:

"It was a rule without consequences, but she can't help but think that all rules, in the end, have consequences and she wonders when judgement will come."

"Fate is written long before the world begins, woven into the very fabric of existence, defining life and death and plotting out the epic tales of history with all the skill of a master storyteller."

"In the privacy of her own little world, her own mind, there are no distractions, no glimpses of possibility, no sudden urges to shout or scream or warn. She knows herself Ė she knows her own future, bits of it at least (she quite likes the one where she has a herb garden in the back of a little, thatched cottage) and it doesn't faze her."

And really all of it, actually. :)

Ooh, all the stuff about Dumbledore was super intriguing... It looks like the skirmish with Grindelwald, Aberforth, and Ariana actually happened, but is Grindelwald still in the picture? Albus is going to say "I love you," but will Grindelwald use that to destroy him? Arrggh, I want to know!

I look forward to reading the next chapter. I hope you post it soon! :)

Oh, and happy JulNo! :D

~UnluckyStar57

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