Reading Reviews for The Precise Hour
  
12 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Pretense Of Perfection Eggs and Owls

12th July 2014:
Wow, what an interesting one-shot. I love reading about different magical cultures, and you chose something so unique, and wrote it brilliantly. I can't help but feel bad for Hassan, it's terrible that he loves this girl so much, yet cannot act on his feelings toward her. The watching her from the window part read as a little bit creepy, but definitely added to his overall charm in the end, because he wasn't doing it to be a perve or anything, if that makes sense. I like Sahar's character as well, even though she doesn't make much of a physical appearance. Her leaving the white pigeon behind was very sweet, and I feel it sort of represented their relationship with one another well. It's a shame that she was married off to someone she didn't love, but very sweet that Hassan named the bird after her. I think this was a very unique idea, and you made it work really well.

--house cup 2014 review--
gryffindor

 Report Review

Review #2, by randomwriter Eggs and Owls

12th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review

Nadia, I cannot even gather my thoughts to leave you a coherent review at this point. First of all, I must applaud you for trying something this different. It's one of the most unique things that I've ever had the pleasure to read. Forgive me, my default assumption was that this was set in Afghanistan. I suppose it would fit, but it's Egypt, which is a place I've always wanted to go to. I love that you chose to write a story that's set in such a different place. We never see things like this in fanfiction.

Hassan and Sahar. Just. Waav. I really felt sorry for the two of them when her harami (I suppose you know what it means in Hindi and it is not a 15+ word :p) brother chose to intervene and get her married off. I hate how it is such a taboo to even look at a girl in such cultures, though it does make for beautiful literature. Also, I know why they look down upon it, but I don't agree, but that's me going off on a tangent so I'll zip it.

Anyway, I don't know what to say to you. This was absolutely sad, but beautiful and it reminded me so much of Khaled Hosseini's stories, and I do think you might have been inspired by him. He's an excellent writer and so are you. You painted a picture in my mind with this one. It was so visceral. The characters were amazing and the plotline was really believable. I can't believe how well you've written this.

I spotted only two typos. There's one place where you've said 'sitting' instead of 'sipping' and in another place, there was another typo, but I've forgotten, so I'll just tell you when I revisit this because it's bound to happen soon.

This is lovely, Nadia! One of the most enjoyable stories I've come across! :)

 Report Review

Review #3, by UnluckyStar57 Eggs and Owls

11th July 2014:
...Okay. Phew. No tears from me this time!

And still, it was quite sad. I loved the description that you put into this--I could immediately tell that the setting was not Great Britain. Good for you, for writing about wizards who are not in Europe! That must've been quite an undertaking.

Poor Hassan. He had a good thing going, and then it just stopped. The thing about this story is that I want it to be longer. I don't even care about the elements of prompt one that you used--I just want to know more about Hassan and Sahar. I really enjoyed the story that you wove around the prompt. :)

House Cup 2014 Review

~UnluckyStar57

 Report Review

Review #4, by evil little devil Eggs and Owls

11th July 2014:
This was such a sweet story!
I don't know how you managed to make newly-introduced OC's feel like such well-rounded characters in such a short story! I really felt like I knew Hassan by the end of it.
Your writing is amazing, you drew me straight into the story instantaneously, and not once did my attention waver.
This was such a short, sweet, and tragic tale, all at once. The poor owl! It was a very sad story, but I loved the gift of the pigeon at the end, which he named after her. It felt very hopeful, somehow.
I feel like you managed to pack an entire novel into this one-shot, which boggles my mind. This was so beautifully written, and so delightful to read!

- House Cup 2014 Review.

 Report Review

Review #5, by greenbubble Eggs and Owls

10th July 2014:
Hi Nadia! House Cup 2014 reveiw.

I can't say how much I love this! You are the queen of one shots! Before I said that you were the queen of parodies but now I know that you're great and all one shots!

I like how you use various OCs to make the story more of your own. I've seen too many fanfic were people invent no characters or pairings of their own. I mean how boring?! We already know about JK's great characters, it's time to learn more about Hassan and Abdullah.

I like how the starting sentence creates lots of tension to make you want to read on. I really like how you haven't told us the names yet you've just told us one simple fact.

Ooh, Amma! That's a bit like my name only the 'A' is supposed to be and 'E'. From this point I'm guessing that 'Amma' is 'her' but we are yet to find out who 'he' is.

The descriptions in this sentence 'Her laughter was beautiful. Her locks of dark black hair, something he would not see under her headscarf and her rich brown eyes, and fair face. Hassan Mostafa was committing many forbidden glances as he made the exchange for the eggs' are really effective. Simple yet effective. I like how you haven't gone over the top.

This is interesting ... Abdullah is a wizard I'm guessing ...? I got the clue from when Hassan said "you can make use of this as you are a-" . This kind of gives the jist that Abdullah is a wizard who wants Muggle money because he doesn't have time to change the money.

I like the short impact sentence 'Hassan Mostafa had fallen in love'. (clearly with Amma.)


I love your arguments as always. They're more out of hand than the ones I write. I can't seem to write the mad but realistic quarrels that you produce. You always seem to have the absolute perfect word choice and the perfect dialogue too. I think that I had better take a leaf out of your book.


Such a sad ending. It was good thousgh and I couldn't spot any grammar mistakes anywhere to great, great, great, great job!

- Emma :P

 Report Review

Review #6, by ohmymerlin Eggs and Owls

9th July 2014:
Hello!

First of all, you're nOT EGYPTIAN?! The whole time I was reading this I was thinking, "Cool! I haven't heard of Egyptian people being HPFF and the forums yet!" And then I read your note and was just like, ???!!! :O (shhh I know those aren't proper emotions/thoughts but let's just roll with it, yeah?) I'm not Egyptian either but you made it sound so authentic and real! Even if there were some errors, a lot of the time each family or community have their own dialect about this sort of stuff! And I have a feeling if you did make any errors, they wouldn't be that horrible!

Also, is Hassan one of the Quidditch refs in the World Cup? (I accidentally wrote House Cup at first, haha!) The name seems so familiar!

The letters were a sweet thing but I felt so sorry for him when she was getting married to someone else! Maybe one day they'll run into each other! I can't believe the brother killed the owl though! That's absolutely awful! I'm so disgusted! D': But it was nice that he got the white pigeon and then he named it after her :') He'll always have a connection with her then!

Great story!

- Kayla :)

House Cup 2014 review

 Report Review

Review #7, by nott theodore Eggs and Owls

9th July 2014:
Nadia! ♥ ♥ ♥

So I didn't get a chance to read this before you posted the story and I'm coming to this not knowing what to expect, but it was really lovely. Did you take inspiration from Khaled Hosseini here? Because it reminded me of a much shorter version of one of his stories, actually. Like beautiful and sad all at the same time.

I felt so sorry for Hassan in this story. I think you wrote the love so well and the fact that it hadn't worked out for them and wasn't allowed by Sahar's family was so upsetting and sad to read about! And the fact that they killed Ali, as well. So mean! The poor bird hadn't done anything wrong but deliver letters and even that isn't so bad. But I loved the twist you took on the theme of the magical creature in this story and used the owl as the messenger between the two of them and the way that they communicated their love. And then the gift of the white pigeon which he named Sahar at the end was a lovely touch!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #8, by TidalDragon Eggs and Owls

8th July 2014:
Howdy Nadia! I'm stopping by with something tangible to raise your spirits (hopefully)!

So, I too know nothing about Egyptian culture, but this was a really interesting idea! I always enjoy a story that explores how the magical world might exist in a different culture and this didn't disappoint. What was nice about it really was how it stayed relatively simple in a lot of respects, matching up with how letters are exchanged, but carefully wove in elements that are typical of Middle Eastern cultures, like covering of the female form and more formal and proper ways of addressing and courting women (and not doing so outside one's own "station"). Somehow it managed to satisfy my appetite for seeing the wizarding world through another culture's lens without upsetting everything - and I think that's a super accomplishment.

It was a sad ending ultimately - Sahar's brother sounds like a truly brutal man (with her family being little better) - but somehow I thought it rang the way it had to with the culture you had chosen. There was no triumph against the odds for the ill-fated pair, only a sobering, soulful goodbye gesture that left you feeling for what was snatched from them.

Well done!

House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #9, by maskedmuggle Eggs and Owls

8th July 2014:
Hey!

Wow, this was such an excellent fic, but at the same time quite shocking - I'm sitting here openmouthed and really feeling how tragic, and cruel the ending was. I really loved how unique and original this fic was - it had such a different vibe to it due to the setting, the characters, and the storyline. I found all your characters really well thought out - I liked their interesting names that gave me a sense of their culture as well. I thought you did a good job depicting the barriers to Hassan's love for her and it was also very realistically done. It makes me sad because stories like this actually happen in real life (with different barriers). I thought using an owl as their only way of communicating had its own special aspect to it, but the parcel Hassan received actually really irked me, and I can't even deal with how traumatic and upsetting it must've been. All in all, I thought you did such a fantastic job writing such a unique story.

- Charlotte/maskedmuggle
House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #10, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing Eggs and Owls

6th July 2014:
Hi Nadia!!

Eek, I hadn't had the chance to read this one so I was really excited and of course you didn't disappoint!

I think you picked an interesting character here to use, and you also pulled in a lot of the culture which is cool. I don't know if any of it is inaccurate but to me, that wasn't so important.

It' must be so hard having arranged marriages when you love somebody else. I can't imagine being in that situation though but you wrote it well. The owl exchanges were really cute until the last one - that made me sad. Mostly for the bird!!

I also liked the friendship between abduallah and hassan. Their exchanges added some humour to an otherwise fairly sad tale!!

As always, this is lovely writing. You so an amazing job of stories like this Nadia!!

Lauren :)
House Cup 2014 Review

 Report Review

Review #11, by Ravenclaw333 Eggs and Owls

6th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

Firstly - I love the premise of this story. It's so refreshing to see stories set in other countries, exploring the ways wizards and Muggles interact, and you've done a really good job with that here. Having Hassan and Abdullah constantly interacting with Muggles is an interesting choice and adds another unique layer to the story.

There are a couple of issues that I picked up - you've made a typo here: 'Hassan quickly began talking out some sickles' - I assume that's meant to be 'taking' - and where Hassan talks about how it's not his fault if beautiful women stand by their windows, Abdullah's response should be on a new line. Since you're pretty consistent with that everywhere else, I can only assume it was down to the pressure we were all under time-wise to get Event 3 entries in - if you plan on revising, though, just a couple of things to bear in mind :)

As for the actual story itself - it's beautifully done. You've done a brilliant job with evoking the sense of the culture and society, and the relationship between Hassan and Abdullah in particular is perfect - the lovesick young man and the cautious old man looking out for him. The way you've linked religion and morality also rings very true, and it's something I'd love to see explored more - especially within the context of magic and the wizarding world.

I love the use of the owl Ali as a link between the lovers, and how Hassan grows to appreciate him - his death really hits home, and works so well both within the context of the society and the 'forbidden love' idea and as a symbol of their relationship. Sahar giving him another bird is a lovely touch, and you've tied in everything so well with the song, which really adds to the atmosphere of the piece. Well done!

 Report Review

Review #12, by patronus_charm Eggs and Owls

6th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

Back again :D

Omg, my dad is called Hassan, but then again itís such a common name for Muslim parents to give their sons I shouldnít be too surprised to find a fellow Hassan, but yeah I thought you might want to know that :P

This was such a beautiful story about the love which was never really going to be and it was so moving and poignant and I loved it. But first, I loved how you combined it with the Arabic world and included another culture as I always love it when people do that as it adds another dimension to the story from what they were buying, their names and the odd bit of Arabic and it just made the story a lot more fresh and interesting to read.

Then the characters were so sweet too and Hassan was just adorable the way he faithfully loved Sahar right until the end and Alli was their messenger. Sorry, if Iím not making any sense itís just their love was so pure and so real and for it to end was so sad and yeah Iím in a ball of feels right now but I loved this story!

-Kiana

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login