Reading Reviews for Who Killed Lucy?
18 Reviews Found

Review #1, by SunshineDaisies Ruptures and Punctures

11th July 2015:
House Cup 2015 Hufflepuff

I wanna know why all these 500 word stories are so sad. :( This was heartbreaking. I think you captured the emotion so well. The confusion and disbelief that fogs around a sudden loss is so apparent. Things seem to move quickly and slowly at the same time. You conveyed that foggy sort of feeling so well. The switching between characters definitely helped that particular feeling come across.

The characters thoughts are so spot on as well! I can see a mother who's lost a child just sitting patiently, waiting for them to come home; a father just running until he can't anymore; a sister who realizes she is no longer a sister. It was so gorgeous and heartbreaking to read these feelings. You really did an excellent job with this.

And I have to say, as a lover of happy endings, I'm so glad you ended this the way you did! It was just the lift a story like this needed, I think. It's subtle, but there's hope that things might be okay, and it softens the rest of the story by just the right amount.

Fantastic work!

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Review #2, by Dojh167 Ruptures and Punctures

11th July 2015:
Hufflepuff House Cup 2015 Review

I love Percy Weasley, and I love that you chose to write about his family, which often seems to get overlooked.

This story has such beautiful poetry to it.

I loved the part about Molly cracking. It was so powerful, and both felt very metaphorical and very real.

I really liked how you jumped between each member of the family. It really contributed to the feeling that they were all overflowing with emotions so loud as to drown each others' out. It also felt like this story was happening in many times and places at once, which really adds to that feeling. I particularly like the line "The family sits and stands, cries and weeps."

It was unclear to me how old Lucy and Molly were. I caught that there was a ten year age difference, but the exact ages were unclear.

These lines were extremely powerful to me: "As she reaches the cupboard, for the first time, she does not remove Lucy's cup. They drink in silence. Audrey holds hers with both hands and Percy is already finished."

Lovely, lovely story!


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Review #3, by mymischiefmanaged Ruptures and Punctures

6th April 2015:
~For the Capture the Flag Tournament, Round Three~

Back again with another attack :)

Okay, having just read 'Waterfall' I knew I'd enjoy this one. You've used a very similar style and you're so good at it.

This is such an interesting exploration of some of the less commonly written Weasleys, and I really like what you've done with them. You've really cleverly shown some of the different aspects to grief: Audrey's desperate denial, Percy's anger and Molly's self destruction. Is your Molly here the same character as in Waterfall? It's believable that she could be. And then you switch around their reactions so we see Percy in denial and Molly feeling rage. And it's just super clever.

These three lines stood out to me:

"Lucy Weasley was killed by a blade that was struck by a storm and punctured this one damn bubble."

"A for apple, B for blood. C for clot, D for dead."

"Molly realizes that she is an only child, just like she was back when she was six and Lucy had not happened yet."

The statement "Lucy had not happened yet" particularly resonates because it reduces Lucy to an event in their lives, rather than a person, and in an awful way right now that's what she is to them. In this moment she's a tragic event for the rest of them.

This is another amazing story Nadia. I'm super impressed.

Emma xoxo

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Review #4, by Pretense Of Perfection Ruptures and Punctures

12th July 2014:
Aw, poor Lucy! And Audrey and Percy and Molly. Wow, to die so suddenly at such a young age..that's a shame. By the title I was definitely expecting some sort of murder mystery or thriller type story, but I still enjoyed this regardless. You manged to caputre the family's grief and denial beautifully, and you made it seem very real. The fragmentation of their thoughts adds a really nice touch to the overall tone, and really adds to the effect of confusion that they are all feeling. I like how you only alluded to how she died, and didn't come and spell it outright. The uplifting message of hope at the end is inspired, and even though they are all still reeling from her death, that faint twinge of light at the end of the tunnel gives them all hope. I think you did a perfect job with spelling and grammar, and the pacing was excellent as well.

--house cup 2014 review--

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Review #5, by Lostmyheart Ruptures and Punctures

11th July 2014:
Hi again, Nadia.

This was really different from your Dean story - but it was still very magical, so strangely light.
Strange in a good way! Because despite the heavy topic of one's daugther's death, you managed to keep it somewhat light. Which I think is admirable. Definitely.

It surprised me to read swearwords, I did not see that one coming :) haha. So I smiled whenever I thought some words or phrases were oddly out of place, yet at the same time not. Seriously Nadia, I don't know how you do that! It's amazing.
I mean, come on, popped like a balloon? And then you lightly turned back to her mother, like what you just described wasn't that big of a deal. That was quite couragious of you, I must say.

It was of course a sad story, but as we never really got deeply into the family's sorrow, I felt it was a light story. A brief glimpse of their life in sorrow and misery.

- Avi


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Review #6, by randomwriter Ruptures and Punctures

11th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review

Hello Nadia *hugs* I had to come and review this. I'd read it a couple of days ago just before falling asleep, so it took me a while. Sorry!

This was one crazy story. Never in fanfiction have I read something like this. It's just... woah. You took a really complex and distressing issue and treated it so well. You wrote it so well, and the idea of this whole thing was so unique and utterly amazing. It was a terrible thing to happen and it's so difficult for her family to deal with something like that now, but you somehow made the ending hopeful and somehow, it fits. It shows how even the most difficult of situations can be tided over with some acceptance and strength. Inspite of it, though, this was sad and powerful and I can't believe you managed all of it in 500 words. That's not a lot of words to take the reader through a journey as complex and messed up as this, but you did it.

This line--> "A for apple, B for blood. C for clot, D for dead." This line was just really unique and powerful. There were a lot of heavy impact lines in this story, but this just stood out for me.

Each time I read something of yours, I'm floored by how much you've improved! Great job, Nadia. You talented, talented person! *hugs*

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Review #7, by UnluckyStar57 Ruptures and Punctures

10th July 2014:
I read this with caution, knowing that if you made me cry one time, you could do it again.

And you did. Darn it. This story made a mess of my emotions, and I can't really do a whole lot about that. I should have known that something with a summary like, "Dead," would have made me cry. But, foolishly, I forged ahead anyways. And now look. Ugh. I'm sad. :'(

I guess it was the finality of the whole thing--like, she's dead. She's not coming back. ABCDEFG, she's dead. Life took her away, and now there's no refunds or exchanges. No. It just makes me so, so sad. And the fact that you wrote it in only 500 words is absolutely amazing. Not all stories about death make me cry (lately, the ones from the HC have, but that's not a usual thing). I'm sure that if this story weren't for the HC, I would still cry. Dang it. It's so wonderful and awful at the same time. Tell me, do you always write about death?

Thank you for the feels.

House Cup 2014 Review


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Review #8, by evil little devil Ruptures and Punctures

9th July 2014:
You're trying to break my heart, aren't you? :P
This was beautiful! Gosh, if it's possible, I think I liked this one even better than your Luna-Dean story.
The descriptions! And the imagery! How do you even do that? The metaphor of the balloon, the part about all the kids screaming as she fell down, like at a party - I am speechless at the brilliance of this.
You fit so much into 500 words. So much beautiful writing, so many beautiful emotions. I am in love with this!
Just . . . wow. I don't even know what else to say. This was absolutely fabulous!

- House Cup 2014 Review.

Author's Response: I'm not I promise I promise! ♥

Idk how I do imagery. To be frank, when i write, I'm masterly lazy as hell. So I'm a rather minimalist so I kinda just tell instead of show and that's my "style" :P aka just be lazy always.

Thanks for the super kind review! I think you're awesome for being able to leave so many... good luck to the puffs, y'all are doing so well!!

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Review #9, by CambAngst Ruptures and Punctures

9th July 2014:
Hi, Nadia! Before I tell you how great this was, one formality:

House Cup 2014 Review

There, credit will be taken. ;)

You took a horrible, heart-breaking situation and treated it with a lot of sensitivity and finesse in this story. Poor Lucy was struck down by an invisible assailant in the prime of her life. There was no warning, no moment that anyone could point to and say, "If only I'd done this instead of that." It's a different kind of survivor's guilt, I think, from what people normally deal with.

Poor Audrey just seemed broken, unable to accept or deal with what had happened. Percy came across as desperate to do something to heal his broken family, except that there was nothing he could do. Then there was Molly, who was trying to find some way to make it all better. Each coping in their own way, taking a small measure of strength from one another. Very, very sad, but also realistic and very tangible to the reader.

Your writing was lovely. The details that you plucked out to focus on were exactly the sorts of things that add gravity and depth to an otherwise stark situation. I didn't see any typos or grammatical problems. Nicely done!

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Review #10, by maskedmuggle Ruptures and Punctures

9th July 2014:

Woah this was definitely a really powerful one-shot in so few words. The plot was really unique and interesting to read about, especially since a brain aneurysm is so, so rarely seen in fan fiction. The way you wrote this was really well thought out. The part about A for apple, B for blood.. was just such an interesting line. The one thing that I wasn't that fond of in this story was the two instances of swearing because it felt completely unnecessary in my opinion and not really in Percy's character at all, especially that second profanity - there's no way I can personally see Percy saying that about Lucy, despite how angry/traumatised he might be. Other than that though, I thought this was really well written, especially with the characterisation of all the characters and showing the effect of Lucy's loss on all of them so well. Great idea for a story.

- Charlotte/maskedmuggle
House Cup 2014 Review

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Review #11, by jessicalorewrites Ruptures and Punctures

8th July 2014:

Wow, this is so so sad. I thought maybe there would be some mystery to it, given the title, but what I found instead is even better. In a way, actually, there is still mystery because I was left guessing throughout it all what killed her. I'm glad you included that in your author's note though otherwise I don't think it would have clicked enough for me!!

Gosh, all they want is for Lucy to come back to them :( such a sad, sad oneshot. Seriously though -- 500 words and I'm feeling all these emotions?!!?

Congrats on being a fantastic writer!! One of the best oneshots I've read for the HC so far.


{House Cup 2014 Review - Gryffindor - Educational Decree #3}

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Review #12, by ShadowRose Ruptures and Punctures

7th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review

Hi Nadia! I figured I'd swing by and review a thing or two of yours!


This was such a short, punctuated story, but it's filled with so many emotions oh my gosh. I'm entirely in awe. In just a short 500 words, you've managed to capture so much pain and hurt in the hearts of all three Weasley members, and you've made it so real and so heartbreaking that yeah, I may have cried. Oops.

I really love the choppy structure of this story, particularly at the beginning, when the grief is the strongest. It makes everything so raw and sharp, which is why I think the emotions show so strongly in this story.

This was only 500 words, but feels like 500 pages of emotion. Once again, MY GOSH. I'm just in awe.

Anyway, this was absolutely stunning and just so, so heartbreaking. You captured the intensity of the situation fantastically and I'm just in awe. I think I've said that already.

-ShadowRose (Taylor)

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Review #13, by HeyMrsPotter Ruptures and Punctures

6th July 2014:

So this totally and utterly broke my poor heart. The structure that you had with the short snappy sentences made it feel like you were stomping on my feels with every single one.

I can't ever imagine what it would feel like to lose a child but you've managed to convey Percy and Audrey's pain so beautifully and tragically. It's really just amazing how much you've managed to get in in just 500 words. It's a testament to your brilliant writing.

The idea of them overcoming the loss of a member of their family is a really interesting idea for the prompt we were given and just truly proves how superb your brain is!

As always with your stories, I loved every single letter of this. Ah-maz-ing.

Dee -House Cup 2014 review

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Review #14, by nott theodore Ruptures and Punctures

6th July 2014:
Nadia Nadia Nadia.

Seriously. Why do you do this to me? Also, one day you're going to teach me how to make people feel things in so few words like you always manage to do with your writing and then I'll be happy. This is just so sad ♥

I think you wrote the grief all of them were feeling really well. They're all feeling it far too much to put into words, and they just can't handle the concept that Lucy's gone and isn't going to be coming back - she's so young and has been taken away so unfairly. It's just really, really sad and I don't like the idea of them having to sit around with an empty chair at their table. I repeat, why do you do this to me?

The ending was great. I felt like you stripped them bare so all that remained was their grief in the main body of the story so then for the ending to be hopeful fit so well with the overcoming adversity prompt. It's going to take baby steps but slowly they might manage to get over this - there'll always be a hole there for them now Lucy's dead, but together there's a chance they might make it through.

Beautiful, lovely.

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

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Review #15, by DracoFerret11 Ruptures and Punctures

6th July 2014:
Hello there! This is Ravenclaw DarkRose from the forums here to review for you for the House Cup 2014! :D So, let's go over things:

First off, I really need to mention that I absolutely loved this line: "A for apple, B for blood. C for clot, D for dead." It hit me so hard. Really, really lovely.

On a different note, though, the following sentence confused me: "Lucy Weasley was killed by a blade that was struck by a storm and punctured this one...bubble." I just wasn't sure at all what that was supposed to mean. Also, I thought the choice of word for "All Percy can think is..." was odd. I just couldn't picture Percy thinking/saying that.

Plot: This story was really moving. The plot was interesting--an aneurysm is something that even wizards can-t escape--and I think you pulled off the emotions surrounding death very well. I could feel the confusion in the family and the pain associated with Lucy's death.

Characterization: I mentioned the part where I wasn't sure if Percy would say that choice word. Audrey seemed bit too much in denial over everything that had happened. It was odd to me that the only person who understood and accepted the finality of Lucy's death was her sister, rather than either of her parents.

This was so well written. It was so lovely and sad and beautiful, and the repetition worked perfectly. With a few tweaks or clarification here or there, this would be even better (if that's possible). The writing style was really lovely. Well done and good luck to Gryffindor in the House Cup!

--Emily (House Cup 2014 Review)

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Review #16, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing Ruptures and Punctures

6th July 2014:
Nadia my love! How are you so awesome? This story... eugh! It just breaks my heart and I cannot deal with how sad it is. And how amazingly well written.

The repetition of certain words is so good. The whole story has a rhythm to it that makes it so easy to lose yourself in. How do you write so well?

The A for Apple line, and when Molly realises she's going to be an only child again, eugh feels. Those lines really stood out. And then she doesn't get Lucy's cup out for the first time... I can't imagine losing my sisters so this is just heart breaking!

Awesome entry my dear, you're writing gets better and better!

Lauren :)
House Cup 2014 Review

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Review #17, by patronus_charm Ruptures and Punctures

6th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

Yo, Nadia, stop killing me with all these feels. I already died in the Luna one-shot so I donít think itís possibly to die again so what am I meant to do with myself now?

The style and structure of this story with the blunt sentence and just sort of no frills feel about it worked so well as it really took away all the extravagances of death and just laid it out how it was. All four of them, Percy, Audrey, Molly and Lucy got their part in it and that worked because of the structure which was so good.

I loved all of their reactions as it just seemed so true with the way all seemed so helpless and just not sure what to do with themselves. I think Audrey was the one who really got to me as the gap in her heart where her daughter should have been was so evident it was so sad because she tried to come up with all these things which would fill it again but nothing would and it was just so sad.

This ĎA for apple, B for blood. C for clot, D for dead.í and this ĎSitting together makes them feel like everything might be okay one day.í Were just some of the fab quotes and lines found in here! Seriously, though I am so impressed with this as youíve just improved in your writing so much and in such a short amount of time itís sort of crazy you know but awe-inspiring too! Keep it up! :D


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Review #18, by momotwins Ruptures and Punctures

28th June 2014:
I really liked this story. Despite the sad topic, it was such a fresh take on death's effects on the deceased's loved ones, it was really fascinating to read. I love the line where Molly realizes she's an only child again, it's just so poignant. And about Lucy stealing her heart and going away. Really amazing writing. Great job!

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thank you so much for reading this story. I'm really pleased you liked this, it means so much to me.

Thank you! ♥

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