Reading Reviews for Violet Hill
56 Reviews Found

Review #1, by SunshineDaisies a glimpse of infinity.

12th June 2015:
House Cup 2015 Hufflepuff

As morbid as it sounds, I LOVE reading about death. I want to work as a Hospice social worker eventually so stuff like this is absolutely fascinating for me. I'm so glad I found it!

The writing in this is just gorgeous. It wasn't surprising coming from you, you've really got a knack for making your writing flow in a melodic sort of way. I think that it's especially appropriate in this context. You're approaching the concept of death from a more... I want to say spiritual but I'm not sure that's exactly what I mean, perspective and the writing absolutely fits that tone. I loved reading about Scorpius seeing the thestral. His reflection on it is so wise and very much a realization that a lot of people have after experiencing the death of a loved one.

Your description of the thestral was fantastic as well. It fit very well as a representation of death. You described it in a way that made it feel as if it were withering away, which is something I at least associate with death. It also reminded me of The Tale of Three Brother's, in which the resurrection stone brings people back, but not completely, as they don't belong in this world. Thestrals seem very much the same way. Only half present as they don't really belong in this world. It was beautiful.

This was a really great read and I'm really excited to see what's next!

Author's Response: Hey!! ♥

Haha, I love writing about death so you don't have to worry about being morbid as I am ultra morbid.

Aw, thank you so much as that really put a smile on my face. I get what you're trying to say and I'm glad you picked up on that as I guess I was trying to show a more of a philosophical approach to it rather than the usual doom and gloom. Aw, I'm glad that you liked that as I wanted to show that you can spot your loved ones anywhere if you try.

Haha, yeah, I was surprised by how well it linked in with death. Ooh I hadn't thought about the link to that story but it does work I think. I'm so glad that you liked it though and thanks for your wonderful compliments.



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Review #2, by Dojh167 an iridescent colour.

12th June 2015:
Hufflepuff House Cup Review 2015

Wow, this chapter starts out so differently that I wondered if I was on the wrong story. After chapter 1 I had expected Scorpius to take a leap forward, but e didn't really. And so when the end of chapter 2 looked optimistic, I didn't really expect that much of a change. Well, wrong again!

You create a really wonderful contrast here with the previous two chapters. Where before thoughts of Death were so oppressive and brutal, not Scorpius is much more calm and accepting.

The ending paragraphs where he described how Lily is immortal was really incredibly touching.

I'm glad I read this!


Author's Response: Hello again!

Yes I think a few people forgot this was a short story collection so the connection between stories would be weaker than if it were an actual short story.

I'm glad that you liked the contrast as I did want to show how his emotional maturity had developed over time.

Aw, thank you so much and thanks for this great review as it put a smile on my face! :D


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Review #3, by Dojh167 the land of delusions.

12th June 2015:
Hufflepuff House Cup 2015 Review

After the different nuances of Scorpius' attitude towards death in chapter one, I was interested to see how he would think about it now. He is obviously sill afraid of it, but he also seems to have a bit ore respect for it, and sees it like a living thing like the thestral.

I really enjoyed this passage: "Death rides in under the cover of the ebony sky and steals her from you, obliterating her from memory."

I like the wisdom and caring that you gave Draco here, though I would have liked to see a more three dimensional image of him. Is he struggling in some way?

Author's Response: Hello there!

I'm glad you liked the different aspects of it as death really is such a complex thing there are so many sides to it and people express their emotions to it in so many different ways.

Aw, I'm glad you liked that! ♥

Yes, the lack of depth here bothered me a little but given which challenge it was written for I couldn't explore it much further but he is struggling greatly.

Thanks for another great review! ♥


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Review #4, by Dojh167 a glimpse of infinity.

12th June 2015:
Hufflepuff House Cup 2015 Review

This story had a very interesting rhythmic feel. Like I'm not kidding - it felt like a coldplay song. I'm going to guess that you were listening to coldplay while you were writing this and were able to manifest it. Whatever you did, well done.

I really really enjoyed your physical description of the thestral. It was very evocative, both physically and emotionally, and did a great job of filling us in on Scorpius' emotional state.

You do use the word infinity twice within two paragraphs, and then the word thestral twice in a single sentence.

I think you did a really good job of transitioning Scorpius through so many different emotional states in a short amount of time in a very smooth way. Nice work.

Author's Response: Hello there!

Hahaha, yes, I definitely was listening to the Coldplay song whilst writing this as it actually inspired the story so it's cool you got such a sense of it in the story.

I'm glad you enjoyed it as they're such interesting creatures and so much fun to describe.

Haha, I guess that's as the story is greatly inspired by the two!

I'm glad you thought that worked out and thanks for this great review! :D ♥


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Review #5, by The Basilisk a glimpse of infinity.

22nd March 2015:
Hello, It is I, The Basilisk once again visiting your author page. Something about your writing always draws me in - indeed you're lucky that I'm paying you multiple visits. Keep your eyes down, little Ravenclaw while I grace you with this review.

I love the concept of death you've played around with here. As a creature who has lived a thousand years, death seems far away, an illusion, so it was very interesssting to read this. You managed to say so much in such a short narrative. Your choice of words is commendable. The sentences flowed together beautifully and the imagery painted was ssspectacular.

The underlying sadness of Scropius losing his mother was tied in at the end with the hope presented by the Thestral - unique, fascinating and well written. The ending was indeed the mossst beautiful and moving bit of this piece. I am once again astounded by the brilliance of your writing.

Hiss Hiss,
The Basilisk

Author's Response: Hello Basilisk! I just wanted to say thank you so much for these reviews! I haven't been motivated to write in months and the blip looked like it was turning into something more than that, but getting these reviews from you has definitely made me want to write again so thank you so much for that :D

I'm so glad that you liked the concept as it was fun to write because playing with the idea of what is infinity, life and death was a lot of fun.

I know it's so sad :( I just hope that he can somehow meet her again as that would be lovely because to see someone so desperate and lost is just horrible. :(

Thanks once again for this fabulous review! :D


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Review #6, by Lululuna an iridescent colour.

19th December 2014:
Hey hey!! :)

Ooh, I really liked how while the first two chapters were about Astoria's death and this one about Lily, there were still links between the two of them. Like how Lily was the one who helped him come to terms with Astoria dying. I particularly liked this line:

she was the one who allowed the light to seep in. Beam by beam, she wiped away your melancholic edges. It was just such a neat image and I could really picture Scorpius' emotions here.

I like how much Lily's character was flushed out, with her interest in history and how she seems very clever and logical. I liked how they were just good friends, not necessarily in a relationship. I suppose thinking back that fits with the HC prompt and it felt really unique as usually I might expect a story like this to be about a spouse, but it was all the more meaningful that they were friends in a way. It's lovely to see how Scorpius sees Death as not limiting, but that Lily will live on forever. It was a really nice ending to the story and tied it all together so well.

Great job with these, Kiana, I really loved reading them!! :) Sorry again for taking forever! ♥

Author's Response: Hi hi!

I'm glad you liked the link as I wanted to make the final chapter a little more positive and less negative than the previous had been as it couldn't be all dark and gloomy.

I'm so glad that you liked it, as we usually see Scorpius in a relationship with one of the Weasley/Potter girls, I wanted to change it here and make them friends instead as it's quite different for him, plus that's what the prompt was! I'm glad you liked the idea that death wasn't limiting as I think it's something we should all remember as it will make life a lot easier that way.

No problem Jenna, and thanks again for the great reviews! ♥


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Review #7, by Lululuna the land of delusions.

19th December 2014:
Hello again, my dear! ♥

Ooh, this chapter was so creepy. Even more so than the last one, I'd thought that Scorpius had accepted his mother's death but this shows that the grieving stages are a process, and perhaps something that he will never quite come to terms with.

The windís soft tongue wraps itself around you, drawing you into its hushed words, making you think its blurred syllables, obscured vowels, are the truth, that it doesnít possess an ounce of lies. I really loved this line, it was such a cool personification of the wind and really effective. Scorpius' idea of Death as an essence or presence also really felt powerful and reminded me of Death in the Tale of the Three Brothers.

I like Draco's idea of Death and how he sort of brings Scorpius out of this eerie world and back into reality. It felt like Scorpius' grief had sort of gone beyond his simply missing his mother and become a more psychological fear that affected his own idea of his own identity, and that he needs Draco's words to bring him back to reality.

Another great story! :) I liked how it expanded on the first story but also brought something new and a different angle in understanding his mother's death. Well done! :)

Author's Response: Hey again Jenna! ♥

Haha, I know, as this is perhaps the more reflective stage of the grieving process where he really has to confront all the horrors of death.

Aw, thank you so much, it was so much fun making Death more of a character as he's so intricate and complex when you do personify him it's so much fun to write.

He does, and I think him being an only child and having a sort of recluse father doesn't help much with the grieving process as he's doesn't have anyway to confide until Draco finally got his act together and looked after him.

Thank you so much for this fab review, Jenna! ♥


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Review #8, by Lululuna a glimpse of infinity.

19th December 2014:
Hi Kiana! I'm FINALLY here for the TGS review exchange from forever ago, and I'm so sorry for taking this long! :( My only (not very good) explanation is that RL has really taken over me and kept me away from HPFF, but should be a bit better now. :)

I love the idea of this short story collection and how each chapter centers around the same theme. Also what a great song to frame the stories around, it's a weirdly inspirational song haha and so chilling.

Great job with the second person POV, as always! :) I think it helped bring that eerie quality to the story, but at the same time made me feel sort of detached from Scorpius, as if he has secrets that he's not yet sharing with us and that slowly are hinted at throughout the story. I felt like even though the story was short, we got a strong understanding of his character - how he runs away, how he is quite introspective, but looks to external objects for understanding and signifiance. I really liked the imagery as well, between the white of the snow and his mother's skin, and the image of the dark, fragmented Thestral in contrast.

It's a really interesting use of the HC prompt to have Scorpius kind of bonding with the Thestral and it actually helping him accept his mother's death. It was a really unique use of the relationship between bereaved and Thestral and I liked the idea of Scorpius finding peace and acceptance through the understanding of death.

Great job with this, Kiana! :) Onwards I go to the next chapter!

(PS. Sorry about the weird / marks, they've been appearing in my reviews today for some reason).

Author's Response: Hey Jenna, don't worry RL has kept me away from HPFF a lot lately too so I completely understand how it is for you.

Aw, thank you, I thought it would make it slightly more eerie too which is why I opted for it as this is quite a dark time for Scorpius to deal with. I'm so glad that you got an understanding of his character though as it was hard to try and convey that in 500 words as well as develop the rest of the story too.

Aw, thank you, Thestrals have always interested me because of their close relationship with death so it was fun to explore the more positive connotations rather than the negative ones.

Thanks for a great review, Jenna! ♥


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Review #9, by True Author a glimpse of infinity.

1st September 2014:
Hello Kiana! Here for the Ravenclaw review battle!

I know you said you'd prefer a review on another story of yours, but slash isn't really my thing. I've seen people recommend this story a while ago and the summary is way too intriguing. So here I am! :)

The best thing about your story is the originality of your plot. This concept was rather a tough one and I'm amazed at the way you've handled it. It's amazing!

Wow, you have some beautiful imagery here. Making the scene take place when it's snowing was a VERY clever idea. It just made everything even more breathtaking.

Will be back for more!


Author's Response: Hi Ashwini!

It's fine, I understand, that's why I said I didn't mind what you read really. I'm so glad that you liked the originality about this as it means a lot to me. Thank you so much for the wonderful compliments, they really made me smile! :D


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Review #10, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing an iridescent colour.

12th July 2014:
Hello again!

I wasn't sure how you would bring the last prompt into play in the story but I loved what you did here. A friendship between Lily and Scorpius was certainly not what I had in mind. You did a great job of showing how eternal their bonds were. It was lovely that Lily helped him so much with his mothers death, something he wouldn't have overcome easily but then their friendship became so much stronger in all the years afterwards too.

Again. Description. Honestly, I can't tell you how beautiful it really is. You have such a way with words, each chapter has read so beautifully and flowed so well and your word choices are all perfect. I could quote so many bits back to you but I'd just end up quoting the majority of the story.

I thought you did a great job with all three pieces, tying them together into a great overall story! Well done!

house cup review 2014

Author's Response: Hi again Lauren!

Haha, yes, this chapter was certainly one of twists with it being Lily and the fact it had a lighter tone, but then I think it's possibly my favourite one because of those turns it had. I'm glad that you liked the glimpses of their friendship though because it was really fun to include and I really wish I could have expanded upon it now.

Aw, thank you so much!!! It really means so much to hear me to hear that so I'm just squeeing away now so excuse me if the rest of the review makes no sense. :P

Thanks for such a great review and sorry for taking ages to respond to it!


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Review #11, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing the land of delusions.

12th July 2014:
Hey again!

I love that you changed to second person for this chapter... I love reading it and you did a great job of it here.

The chapter starts out very dark and you again had such vivid descriptions... your writing is absolutely beautiful to read, I can't compliment you enough. You did a great job of making Death so real and terrifying for Scorpius so great job.

I really like the ending... For me it was kind of unexpected for Draco Malfoy to be the source of such comfort, but I love that's he's grown as a person in this since what we know in the books. His words are very true, and while they can't take all the pain away, it's clear they touch Scorpius, and he sees death isn't all bad. Again - you gave us a more hopeful ending after a very dark start!

Great job again!

House cup 2014 review

Author's Response: Hi again Lauren!

Aw, thank you so much, it means so much to me worry at all! It was actually a ton of fun writing about Death as you could be so much more abstract and obscure with your descriptions if that makes sense so I would definitely recommend it.

Yes, it was unexpected for me too I should say as I almost thought that Scorpius would find comfort within himself but I guess with all of his experience from the war he was bound to be able to help Scorpius and how to deal with death.

Thanks for a great review! :D


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Review #12, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing a glimpse of infinity.

12th July 2014:
Hey Kiana!

Wow, you really managed to pack a punch in so few words! I think a lot of that comes from some of your word choices here, it read so beautifully... you did an amazing job. All the descriptions were so vivid it made the whole thing lovely and enjoyable to read.

What I loved more than anything though is that you turned the Thestral into a symbol of hope, where as we usually see it as something a lot more negative. Of course the story has a real undertone of sadness with the death of Scorps mother which you did a great job of showing because if it only happened 3 weeks ago, that pain has to be still very raw. But at the end when he feels like his mother is still with him because he can see the Thestral, I just thought that was such a hopeful ending... absolutely beautiful!

Well done on a great HC entry and also on the EWC entry! It was beautifully written.

House cup 2014 review

Author's Response: Hey Lauren!

Aw, thank you so much, it was definitely a lot of fun to try and make this a lot more descriptive than usual but a lot shorter too and it was a really useful task and I would recommend it to everyone!

I'm really glad that you liked the spin on the symbolism too because I really wanted to explore the idea of misconceptions and how things can be seen in different lights such as the thestral.

Thanks for an amazing review, it really made me smile! :D


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Review #13, by Pretense Of Perfection a glimpse of infinity.

11th July 2014:
So this is the first story I've reviewed from our house cup submissions this year, and boy, was I pleasantly surprised. I really like what you did with the thestrals, taking a creature that most are afraid of and would consider dark, and really turning it into a positive and uplifting experience. I loved how Scorpius didn't associate seeing the thestral with death in a negative way, but instead saw the creatures as a sign of hope that there is life after our time here on Earth, and how he took comfort in the fact that he would be reunited with his mother again one day. I think you set the scene and overall tone perfectly in the beginning, what with the simple, stark landscape, and how you incorporated lyrics from the song that accurately reflect and reinforce your point. Second person POV is becomming so popular now, and the way you captured Scorpius' character really reflects your talent as an author. I think my favorite part is the end, where he refers to the thestrals as "hauntingly beautiful," I think it's a perfect description for them.

--house cup 2014 review--

Author's Response: Yay, I'm glad that I surprised you because I know that some of the HC got a bit similar at times. I'm glad that you liked the different take on thestrals though as it was so much fun to do and I really liked the idea of them being a sort of anchor to the world and providing calm to the world rather a thing which is a sort of spectre in a way.

Yes, second person POV is my sort of go to now but I just find it so much easier to write in so I just run with it. I really have no words for this review other than thank you so much as it really did make my day and I'm still smiling away now :D


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Review #14, by TidalDragon an iridescent colour.

11th July 2014:
Hello hello hello!

This one was a bit different and I thought it helped you end on a much more positive note both in terms of Scorpius and the overall consideration of death. By the time you close, Scorpius is much lighter - so light in fact that he isn't even focused on himself. And I love the way you challenge the concept of death and mortality with the idea that a person can be such a light to others that they can truly going on living forever, even when their body ceases to function. Nobody considers that when writing about the topic, but I thought it was very true to life that you did and that you boldly explored the idea of "legacy" in this.

I thought Lily (II) was a very interesting choice of person as Scorpius's best friend though. It obviously bucks a lot of the FF trends in that area, which I really like, but at the same time because of that I was also left wondering - why? What is is about Lily - aside from her understanding and light - that initially bridged the family divide between them? How did they become such close friends? Perhaps part of your intent was to evoke these questions and if so, you certainly succeeded.

All three pieces were a thoroughly enjoyable read and incredibly well-written! Also, Violet Hill IS a great song!

House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi hi hi!

Yes, it was a different to the other too but I thought I should explore a happier note after all the darkness and misery :P I'm really glad that you liked the idea of legacy as it was something we discussed in philosophy once and whether that really was a substitute to immortality or not, and like most things in philosophy it sort of stayed in my mind until now when it popped up in this story.

Yes, Lily does buck the trend but I felt as if Rose would have been too obvious and she doesn't seem to scream the oddness that Lily does. If you ever do read Mottled Blue my head canon of her is very similar to the version of Lily in that so that should help you understand why she is this strange person.

Thank you for these amazing reviews and I am so so sorry for taking ages to respond to them!


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Review #15, by TidalDragon the land of delusions.

11th July 2014:
Hello again!

This was such an interesting take on the prompt. The loss of a loved one (especially a parent) is certainly adversity of the highest order, but you took it more macro than that (especially at the end), exploring death as a larger force with varying dimensions.

The darkness Scorpius is in throughout the vast majority of the piece was very well done. I think you really captured the feeling of futility and desperation he was experiencing after his mother passed and you did so with more than imagery this time, but well-expressed emotions that pulled at the reader viscerally.

I also liked that despite making your prompts three separate chapters (which many did), you actually seem to be making them an entire story. That was a really interesting thing to do!

See you for the final installment!

Author's Response: Hi again Kevin!

I'm glad that you liked the take on this prompt because while I feel as if Scorpius never fully overcame his adversity because as you said Death is such a large force it will be hard to reach that point, it was fun to see the shift in his mind set.

I'm really glad that you liked the darkness of death as it's something I thought about for a long time and how we can never, ever really fight against it so it was really fun to explore it here.

Haha, yes, I did intend to make them different but then I just started writing them all and it formed one sort of thing.

Thanks for a fab review :D


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Review #16, by TidalDragon a glimpse of infinity.

10th July 2014:
Howdy Kiana!

Eventually I am going to read Mottled Blue, which I have intended to read since the end of Rumpel's awesome challenge, but alas - life.

Anyway, moving on to this story, I was really impressed with how much you were able to pack into this with so few words. I've always admired authors who have the skill to be TRULY concise because goodness knows I struggled to deal with the 1500 word limit for these entries.

Truly though, forgetting the plot entirely for a moment, this was so well-written. It had everything I would look for in an excellent story. You consistently used strong, evocative language using it to create some vivid imagery ranging from the crucial description of the thestral to the more mundane color change of Scorpius's shoes. You also had really great variation of sentence length that helped the piece flow very naturally and managed to incorporate some great rhetorical storytelling devices like the rule of three in a less obstrusive way than normal. Bravo!

As for the plot, I thought it was really unique. Many people wrote about thestrals, but it was never this close to the loss of a loved one and it was never this intimate an interaction. I thought the closeness and the intensity of the end was a particular highlight and really struck at the heart of the prompt because the creature really had a true impact on Scorpius in those moments that was far from fleeting!

I thoroughly enjoyed this! Beautifully done!

House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi Kevin!

Don't worry, life does get in the way an awful lot of the time so apologies for taking so long to reply to this as it was all of life's fault!

Yes, I'm starting to regret I went with that idea as I really wish I could have explored a lot more in this short story collection but hopefully I can do it again in the future.

Aw, thank you so much! ♥ I did have a thesaurus to hand which should definitely claim some credit for the word choices I must say. I'm really glad that you liked the language here because I was going through my Virginia Woolf reading phase at this point so I was trying to be a lot more reflective and imaginative with it like she is.

Aw thank you again! I've always been intrigued by them as they're so fascinating and just so obscure you can't help but marvel in them so I have to admit I went on a personal philosophical tangent here but it was a lot of fun!

Thanks for an amazing review :D


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Review #17, by MissesWeasley123 an iridescent colour.

9th July 2014:

Okay, so wow. I love the inclusion of Lily in this, their friendship is beautiful. I have to say I didn't see it coming and yet it was amazing. The line where Scorp says that she's immortal really got to me for some reason, I thought it was such a childish thing to say but still very important to the person Scorpius is, and his mentality. Your imagery and descriptions as always were stunning and so so vivid and this beginning line: The quill dangles in the pot of ink. -- IS AMAZING. I really really need you to do a breakdown of how you write descriptions in your stories, as the world must know your secrets!

So wow. This is definitely by far the bets entires I have read Kiana for the House Cup. I am really surprised this didn't win, but I guess it's all subjective anyway. Such a beautiful piece, thank you for sharing.

House Cup 2014 review
Educational Decree #5


Bahaha, no one saw it coming because I guess Rose is always the natural person for him to be with but I was a bit bored of that and wanted to change it up here. I know what you mean about the immortality, because they will always live on and on in your mind so even if they are technically dead, it doesn't seem it so I know where you're coming from. Bahaha, I'm not sure with that I think it was just how to start with Scorpius writing a letter maybe?

Oh, wow, thank you so much, Nadia! But the winners did deserve it too and subjective stuff and all that jazz! Thank you for a fab review! ♥


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Review #18, by MissesWeasley123 the land of delusions.

9th July 2014:
HI AGAIN. Kiana what are you doing now with this beautiful second POV and such angst much wow I really cannot handle such lines like this: Death is but an illusion, a shadow haunting each being's step. I REALLY REALLY HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND THIS: That line, is like Jo Rowling level lines. I am not even kidding, as it is the most beautiful thing ever. The impact and dark eerie feeling it gives is both fearful and yet so hauntingly beautiful, and definitely poetic, as this story seems to be. Scorpius is challenged again, the use of repetition in the line of "Mother, Mother, Mother" is stabbing my heart every time I read it. So thrilling.

You treat death, or should I say Death as a character. This entire feeling of grief and decay is throughout the entire piece, and I love the way you have written this. Amazing, in fact truly brilliant writing, great work!

House Cup 2014 review, Educational Decree #5

Author's Response: HEY AGAIN. I'm not sure it just happened but seriously I need to check my brain as I feel so dark right now and it's not great. Aw, thank you so much! Oooh eeriness! I'm sorry for stabbing your heart though but I guess we could always think of Scorpius to make you feel better as he's so lost and alone in the world and it's so sad so let's all go and hug Scorpius!

Bahaha, don't worry about capitalising it, but yes, because I think that's how Scorpius feels right now with the way it's just following him round and round and he can never really escape it. Thanks for this amazing review! ♥


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Review #19, by MissesWeasley123 a glimpse of infinity.

9th July 2014:

First of all, pretty brilliant that it's COLDPLAY THE BESTEST THING and then YOU ARE DOING EVERY WORDS which is always amazing when someone like you is writing and man this is a dark story! I really really need to talk about your brain. Like ok so you are a claw but how are you so creative with your descriptions and everything is so vivid and wow. everything is so dark and poetic and you write so well AND OMG YOU'RE GONNA HAVE LOADS OF UNANSWERED REVIEWS NOW HAHAHA.

The thestral gives you a glimpse of infinity, of what could lie beyond the land of living. -- um um HOW DO YOU ENGLISH??? Please let us unworthy being know. I cannot explain to you how wonderful that line is, it is so brilliant. Great writing as always Kiana, I really have no words :(

House Cup 2014 review, education Decree #5, let's go Lions!

Author's Response: HEY NADIA!

Yayay, for Coldplay and EWC! And yes it is a little dark sorry about that I just seem to be very dark right now so I feel as if I need to psychoanalyse myself and see what the problem is :P Aw, thank you I'm not sure if its my inner Claw which is guiding me here but it means a lot. Erm, yeah, I've got it down to 65 so whoo it's slowly going down :P

I'm not sure but I think philosophy is creeping into my mind too much right now, well that's the answer I have really! Thanks for an amazing review! ♥


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Review #20, by Leonore a glimpse of infinity.

8th July 2014:
Hi Kiana!

So short, and so pretty! Absolutely gorgeous description - and likening him to the thestral! So much lovely imagery, lovely description, beautiful flow... beautiful everything. The way it's sharp and angular and flawed but despite all it's generally considered to indicate he finds it peaceful and a sign of hope. Lovely.

~ Leo xx

House Cup 2014 Review, Educational Decree #4

Author's Response: Hi Leo!

Aw, thank you! I'm so glad that you liked the description as I really did work hard here to make it etherealy if that even makes any sense :P Thanks for a great review :D


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Review #21, by Veritaserum27 an iridescent colour.

8th July 2014:
Hi hi!

Wow, Kiana - you've done it again. This chapter has an entirely different feel than the two previous ones. Scorpius, as an old man, has a wisdom about him. He doesn't fear or dread death anymore. He finally is able to see that life extends beyond death and that his life (and Lily's) will live on with the living. I am duly amazed at how you managed to portray their love, friendship and his wonderment at her within five hundred words. I can feel how much he loved her. He isn't saddened beyond belief at her death, he is just, simply still in love with her. I liked that you chose Lily instead of Rose. It made the story more unique. She sounds like an amazing person and a light for all who knew her.

House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi Beth!

Aw, thank you! Yes, this chapter has a lighter and happier tone to it, but I kind of have to do it otherwise it would have been an angst overload :P I also really wanted to show that the fear of death perhaps fades away with time and age as we grow older it becomes more of a companion rather than an enemy, hence Scorpius accepting it now. I'm glad you liked the choice of Lily as I know some people didn't, but it can't be Rose all the time otherwise it will get boring!

Thanks for a fab review, Beth, it really did make me smile :D


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Review #22, by nott theodore an iridescent colour.

8th July 2014:
Hello again! I was wondering how you were going to tie in the theme of friendship with death and Scorpius grieving for his mother and once again, you managed to come up with something that surprised me a bit but was still amazing!

I really like the idea of a friendship between Scorpius and Lily, and it being a friendship rather than a romantic relationship. And the way that you described the friendship here really fit with the prompt of eternal bonds from friendship. The imagery in this was simply stunning; the idea of stars and planets and skies fit in so well with the eternal nature of the friendship that you were conveying with this story. It was lovely to hear how much Lily meant to Scorpius as well, the fact that she helped him to overcome his mother's death all that time ago but their friendship had endured much longer than that and at her death, Scorpius was the one remembering her and making sure that she'd be remembered even after they'd both gone - although from the sound of it, she'd already ensured that. Really lovely, Kiana!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi again! Yes, I surprised myself here too because it was going to be Scorpius as a ghost and then him looking back on his friends, but that seemed too morbid, so I went for this happier approach :P

I'm really glad that you liked the friendship because in my head canon I always imagine them being friends because they always seem to be outsiders in my head, so naturally draw to another, sort of like mini-Lunas I guess. I'm so glad that you liked their friendship because that was the thing that worried me because it was like how can I show a lifelong friendship in 500 words, how? So it means a lot to me that it worked for you.

Thanks for another amazing review, my response feels so inadequate in its place now!


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Review #23, by nott theodore the land of delusions.

8th July 2014:
Hello again, lovely! Back for more! I really liked the way that you continued this story because I'd have found it hard to write a short-story collection all centred round one theme but you came up with something that worked really well and flowed well from one chapter to the next.

I really liked the way that death is capitalised and personified throughout this chapter because it makes it more of an obstacle and something that's harder for Scorpius to overcome - it's more intimidating somehow. At the same time it reminds me of the Tale of the Three Brothers and the way that they have to face Death as something real and tangible.

You wrote Scorpius's emotions and pain really well again in this and I loved the ending, when Draco stepped in and did his best to help him. It's hard to realise that someone might be better off when they're no longer suffering because it's true, death is only cruel to those who are left behind, and it's a hard lesson for Scorpius to learn. But I'm glad that he started to accept some of it at the end of this chapter!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi again! Hahaha, it was quite hard, but once I chose to focus it all on death and how people react to it was quite easy as prompts 2 and 3 lend itself to that theme a lot more readily than prompt 1.

Yes, I may have taken that idea from The Book Thief and the Three Brothers, because there Death was always this terrible force lurking away there no matter what and I really wanted to show that here so you could understand the fear and pressure Scorpius faced when thinking of death.

Wooh for Draco! I think it was important to have him here, because as you said this will be the first of many lessons Scorpius learns when it comes to death so it was necessary to have that maturity from Draco here to help Scorpius to put it all into perspective.

Thanks for another great review, Sian! :D


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Review #24, by Veritaserum27 the land of delusions.

8th July 2014:
Hi Kiana,

You did such a great job describing the many aspects of death. Scorpius is consumed by grief and views death as an ever-present force that looms within his periphery at all times. Your writing is so beautiful, I can feel is pain and anguish push through me. Also, you've described the mortal fear of death. It is unknown and many of us fear that more than anything. This chapter made me feel so sad - up until the last part with Draco. Here, you've managed to show another view on death. For anyone who has ever witnessed a love one dying from a terrible illness, death is seen as a respite - able to breathe again because the suffering is over. I was so glad to see that Draco could be there for Scorpius, even if just or a moment.

House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Hi Beth!

Aw, thank you! I'm really glad you got the idea of death that I was trying to convey as it was a little different to how most people tend to view death so I wasn't sure how it would work as him as a figure. Yay for Draco, who thought he could ever help someone overcome death? :P Wooh for Draco being there, and you are right about it helping someone who's very ill. I think Scorpius just needed that to be made clear to him and then he could start accepting things, whereas now it was just too much so hopefully Draco's words could be of some use to him.

Thanks for a great review :D


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Review #25, by nott theodore a glimpse of infinity.

8th July 2014:
Hi Kiana! Ah, I love the title of this story and the song so it's great to be able to finally get the chance to read it and review!

I really liked the way that you chose to write about animals for this prompt. It might be a bit morbid but you know I love all things angst so Scorpius suffering and grieving was really interesting and I enjoyed (in a non-mean and non-morbid way) reading about it!

I think that you characterised Scorpius really well in this piece. If Astoria only died three weeks ago then it's got to still be unbearable to think about and I thought you got the sense of desperation and pain he's feeling across really well in this. I liked the way he was almost trying to escape it but it turned out that he couldn't really.

The Thestral was used really cleverly. Since they're a symbol of death and considered unlucky and stuff, it was great to see a different take on them and the idea that the Thestral offered Scorpius some comfort as it was because of his mother he could see it, which meant that she was there somewhere. It was really sensitively written and beautiful writing, as always!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014

Author's Response: Hi Sian, sorry for taking a while to get to this but I'm glad you got the chance to read this!

Haha, yes it is a little morbid, but angst is the best thing ever, so I get what you mean about enjoying in a non-mean way. I'm so glad that you liked Scorpius though as he is very dear to my heart especially so here as he just seems so lost and floating around the world without any attachments that I want to hug him or something.

I'm glad that you liked the different take on the thestrals as I've always loved them as they're just so interesting, so I quite bad for it and the bad rep it tends to get a lot of the time so I wanted to change it here.

Thank you for a great review! ♥


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