Reading Reviews for a slow shattering
5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by MissesWeasley123 the mirror thrown to the ground

20th August 2014:
Hey Emily, here finally giving prize reviews!

First of all, this is such a contrast from what I've read of yours before! I've read your parody and then this, which is so sad and dark, it's really cool to see how diverse of a writer you really are. Kudos to you for that! ;)

I like the style you have going here. It's repetitive which makes it even more... crazy in a way. I think that shows Lavender's fractured very staccato mind and sanity so well.

You did the:


thing which I found really interesting. Again, it made a great impact and generally was a good technique!

I love this side of Lavender. I love when authors have sort of the same sort of concept except they make it their own, and you again show her state in a very fragile and yet openly descriptive way. Her pain is an open book. I liked that!

I'll wait around for an update! Great work.

Author's Response: Hey Nadia! Is it bad that I'd forgotten all about that? Haha, that meant these reviews were such a pleasant surprise to wake up to, though!

Yay, thank you! I try my best to write as wide a range of things as possible, so to hear that I'm a diverse writer means a lot! *hugs*

Yes, I think that the repetition does show how her mind has regressed a bit so she can only focus on one thing at a time and it also helps to really emphasise the important points of her life now somehow. :P

Yeah, I don't really know where that came from but I think it added to the piece and I'm really happy you found it interesting, it's certainly the first time I've done it.

I'm so glad that you do! The general response to this story has been pretty positive and I'm so glad that I managed to take something similar and make it more original.

Thanks so much for the lovely review, Nadia! ^.^ *hugs*

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Review #2, by grednforge217 the mirror thrown to the ground

22nd July 2014:
OH My Goodness, this is perfect. You are a wonderful, wonderful writer. I love Lavender Brown, and to be honest, most people make her seem crazy in other fanfics, but you turning around and MAKiING her crazy (in the stereotypical sense) is so perfect. Wow. Everything about this, from the title to the writing to the concept, is just wow. Perfect. Well done.

Author's Response: AHH THANK YOU SO MUCH! ♥ ♥ You are a lovely, lovely reviewer. I never really put much thought into Lavender, and I'm not sure when I started, but I ended up putting quite a bit of thinking and love into her, and I figured that anyone who was so - I don't know how to say this, but almost childish, I suppose, in the books would suffer some really bad mental consequences after she was scarred. :( I'm really glad you found that perfect, though. Thank you so, so much for this lovely review, you amazing person! ♥ ♥

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Review #3, by HarrietHopkirk the mirror thrown to the ground

7th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review

I have such a special place in my heart for Lavender stories - she got a pretty raw deal in the books, and I love stories like this about her, where she's depicted as totally realistic. Your writing style is also ridiculously good, so kudos to you.

I almost always forget that Lavender is attacked by Fenrir in the battle, because it's so brutal it's difficult to imagine. Additionally, J.K had portrayed her as such a girly girl that, although she was brave and a member of the Order of the Phoenix, this attack just contrasted horribly with her whole demeanour. Do you understand what I'm going on about? Sometimes I don't. But anyway, you've got that contrast between red blood and white sheets, and it totally works. It's really great.

Her narration style is realistic - the rhythm of it works so fast and rambling that it matches the pace of the battle surrounding her. And your thoughts would be that fast, trying to combat different spells but then also watch your friend be attacked. And poor, poor Parvati! So brutal. So vicious. Good lord. It's the same throughout though - the narration and the tone match the content and action in the story and it works super super well, so well done!

I can't even put into words how good this is, and I how much I appreciate your writing. You really make good use of repetition, dialogue, contrast, imagery, everything and it works spectacularly. So well well done!

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Review #4, by Ravenclaw333 the mirror thrown to the ground

7th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

God, Emily, this story is incredible.

You write the horror of Lavender's situation so well, and her trauma and her hopelessness and the way nobody takes her seriously, and her fear - her fear is palpable, tangible, terrifying in and of itself and you've done such a wonderful, wonderful job with this piece, I'm in awe.

This is one of those stories that leaves me without capability of anything approaching coherent thought, but I'm going to throw some compliments at you and hope they make sense.

Everything you write is so real. The style you use is absolutely perfect for Lavender and her mental state and reflects it so very well, adding a depth and realism and horror to this story quite unlike anything I've seen before. And the ending - when she realises she hasn't seen her parents - that killed me, it really did, because she's so alone and are her parents dead? Why haven't they come to see her? The thought of her so alone and terrified, left with nothing except these images in her head which won't go away and the scars on her face and this label - this label of crazy which just invalidates every aspect of her existence - it hurts so much. I can't even begin to count the things I love about this story but it has so much impact and empathy and poignancy and it's just a triumph, Emily, it really is. 10/10.

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Review #5, by patronus_charm the mirror thrown to the ground

6th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review!

Hi Emily!

Wow, your descriptions in this were so chilling and horrible, Iím not entirely what to say or do. I think it was the first section and the horror of what Parvati is what got to me as that was so brutal, then there was the stark whiteness of her being in the hospital which contrasted really well with the whole story. Finally the dreamlike madness was written so well too.

Your overall style in this was amazing! I really liked how you matched your narration to Lavenderís mind as at first it was fully focused and then it grew more and more detached to show how sanity disappearing. I really liked the list of what mad people could do as itís always interesting and different when people include those, and it almost provided a bit of comic relief for the reader too.

This line ĎWhy do they call it the Battle of Hogwarts? That makes it sound noble. It makes it sound like a battle in one of the fairytales she loved so dearly as a child, made up and told to her by her mother.í That was so fab and it showed how her mind was almost becoming childlike with the way she could only comprehend things on a simple level but understand so much more than everyone else could.

The ending was so sad with the way she was crying out and just wanted to get back something which she knew but it wasnít coming back. It was just so emotional the use of italics was a really nice touch as it added so much more to the story. I really hope a new chapter is up soon as this was so good!


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