Reading Reviews for Derailed
  
90 Reviews Found

Review #1, by onestop_hpfan18 ocho

8th August 2016:
I just am loving this sequel so much. Usually sequels don't match up to the first novel where fanfic is concerned, but this is just grand. We get to see more conflict for James and Carlotta as they continue further into a relationship, as well as some gooey, lovey and steamy moments between the two. Or at least hints at the steamy stuff. I just want them to say 'I love you' so much and finally make a commitment toward marriage. James has to propose to Carlotta by the end, right?! I won't give up hope that it lasts between these two. Carlotta just needs to allow herself the happiness that she deserves despite ol' Parky getting in the way to control her life. She deserves to get what she wants out of a happy and fulfilling life as much as the next person. And James is putting up quite a good fight in not letting her set him free. I just love these two together. I'm looking forward to the next chapter update now that I'm caught up. Jeez, I can't believe I read all of Off the Rails and these 8 chapters within a week... INSANE. Says just how readable and awesome you've made these characters and story lines/conflicts. Great writing thus far! :D

 Report Review

Review #2, by onestop_hpfan18 siete

7th August 2016:
Loved that Doctor Who reference. I picked up on it immediately. Also, I'm wondering if Brigid could be pregnant since she's turned down alcohol and, now, bowing out of playing the Charity Quidditch match. Something's definitely up.

 Report Review

Review #3, by onestop_hpfan18 seis

7th August 2016:
Oh, this exhibition Quidditch match amongst the Potter-Weasley-Lupin family is just going to be brilliant. They're all competitive and it's so much fun watching the banter heat up. I also liked the heart to heart between Carlotta and Scorpius. Great chapter.

 Report Review

Review #4, by onestop_hpfan18 cinco

7th August 2016:
I like that Carlotta and James still have their issues to work out, what with Carlotta still putting ol' Parky before her own happiness. It adds more depth to their relationship. Bit shocked that neither of them have said 'I love you' yet, though, but not too surprised given each of their unwillingness to be in a committed relationship when they first started having fun. But now it's been two years, it's a bit ridiculous. To be hones, I'd like to see them married by the end of this story. Hopefully Carlotta gets over all her insecurities with her disease and James finally tells her he loves her and proposes. Loved this chapter, though. You write the conflict between the pair so realistic.

 Report Review

Review #5, by onestop_hpfan18 cuatro

7th August 2016:
There's nothing quite like a big Weasley-Potter lunch/gathering, and you write them so well. I feel like it could be canon for how well you write all the characters and their interactions with each other. I also loved the development between Carlotta and James's relationship in this chapter, especially toward the end when James told Carlotta that she should start trusting him enough to tell him what's worrying her. And of course that ending we're left with of the two love birds... they're so adorable together. Loved it.

 Report Review

Review #6, by onestop_hpfan18 tres

7th August 2016:
I can't believe that a formal event to raise money for Scribs was held at the Malfoy Manor. The whole scene that played out between Carlotta faced against Nott and Goyle and Malfoy had my breath catching. Dang. That was intense. I'm so glad Percy interfered when he had. I don't trust Lucius Malfoy, no matter how changed the Ministry says he has become. Scorpius clearly isn't comfortable in the Malfoy Manor, and he's a Malfoy. That speaks volumes. Great chapter.

 Report Review

Review #7, by onestop_hpfan18 dos

7th August 2016:
I just loved that that little scene we got of the pair being playful and flirty in the bathroom. Great to see they're even more in love a couple years down the road. Also, I liked the small window reminder we got of Carlotta's Parky. I have this feeling it's going to progress more in this fanfic, especially since we're getting the story from her perspective.

 Report Review

Review #8, by onestop_hpfan18 uno

6th August 2016:
Yay! I love that the sequel is written in Carlotta's POV. James didn't just inherit his father's heart... he inherited his temper, too. It's also great that James bought The Three Broomsticks for Carlotta since he knew that she wanted to own her own pub/restaurant one day. That's love right there. Now when are they going to get hitched? Unless they already have gotten married and you just haven't let that bit of information slip. Great chapter!

 Report Review

Review #9, by Jenna98 ocho

21st April 2016:
Thanks for the update!!!

What a awesome chapter! my favourite bit had to be with those naughty students and the banter with james and Carla. Also loved the bits with Teddy's kids!

I'm really looking forward to the moment that James and Carlotta move their relationship forward.

Looking forward to another update!!

Author's Response: Ha, I love writing about those kids! They're going to pop up so many times in this story, just because I enjoy them so much. Thanks for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #10, by Penelope Inkwell ocho

15th April 2016:
Hey there! Sorry about your family illness situations. Hope everyone is recovering/has recovered well.

Man. I bet a Sleeping Draught in little Remus' milk wouldn't even have any ill effects. That'd be a neat trick. Between that and the shaving, you are pointing out so many things in the magical world that I would be exceedingly jealous of.

Glad to see Ryan getting roped in and to hear word of the wedding. Poor Carla, though. It's sad to see her torn between two worlds.

Oh! And I love how Carla has her little crew of miscreants, and how they clearly all care about her. It is adorable!

CC:

I just noticed this bit, where Carla is advising Ryan: i>"devote the rest of your live to her happiness". It seems as though "live" should be "life".



Oh, and James being so cheerful about putting the kids in detention? Another fun touch. Seems very in character. I'm so glad to get to spend more time with all these characters! It's been great so far, and I look forward to more, whenever it's up! Thanks for all the fun :D

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #11, by Penelope Inkwell siete

15th April 2016:
Poor Carlotta! It must be so hard to be separated from her family that way. Of course, James has an opportunity with that, to get her to see his side of things. After all, she did choose to be a part of the magical world, knowing it would distance her from her Muggle family, and she did it for him. Isn't that, in a way, similar to what he's doing in staying with her despite her Parkinson's? She feels like she's taking part of his life, and he feels like he's taking part of hers. But, in the end, I don't think either of them would have it either way.

Of course, Carla still does have her cut-and-run account...

I loved hearing more about the Quidditch match set up. And a school for Squibs! Yes! Must have! There ought to be something for them, at least. I just love Lily! She's such a vibrant character!

Still enjoying this so very much. I can't wait for the big match. And Brigid is totally pregnant. I'm sure of it! Looking forward to that announcement, too!

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #12, by Penelope Inkwell seis

15th April 2016:
“How do you know he shaves her legs?” Scorpius said, intrigued.

“Oh, you can just tell,” I said.

--I am CRYING! BAHAHA

I really enjoyed the heart-to-heart with Scorpius, and the thought you've put into this character. It seems very realistic that his childhood could have gone down that way. I really hope that this Quidditch thing gives him an in with the rest of the family!

Also, Lily is truly brilliant. I can't imagine how much a fundraiser like this could raise. Yay for the Squibs!

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #13, by Penelope Inkwell cinco

15th April 2016:
Wow. A chapter of emotion.

I am feeling all kinds of ominous foreshadowing with Carla's whole bank thing. Either James finds out about (a) her giving herself a lesser wage than she really should be paid, as manager, or (b) her keeping a fully stocked Muggle bank account for the express purpose of being able to cut and run. Oh, he'd be so upset.

That said, I can kind of understand about the back-up plan bank account. Very Slytherin. Although refusing to pay herself more than her employees is def more of a Hufflepuff thing. I can't help but wonder where Carla *would* have been sorted.

Anyway, either James is going to have an absolute fit, or Carlotta really *is* going to run away. Or both. I can't handle it! Ahhh.

CC:

Ingrid was James’ beautiful, graceful and irritatingly likeable girlfriend.
-- "ex-girlfriend" maybe? This confused me for a second, because "girlfriend" sounds current, and I was trying to figure out if it was supposed to be someone else before realizing that she was an ex.

Also, it might be good to clarify Carla's motivations for inviting Ingrid over a little earlier. Everyone seems to completely understand well before it was fully explained, and I was a little confused for most of the chapter.


This has, of course, been another highly-readable chapter, if a sad one. I'm suddenly very worried about Carla and James. It seems things haven't been sorted quite as much as I thought.

Also, IS BRIGID PREGNANT??? 12 sickles says Brigid is pregnant! I'll be so excited for her and Fred. Oh my gosh, Fred is going to spoil his children rotten!! :)

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #14, by Penelope Inkwell cuatro

15th April 2016:
Ah, family dinners. Warm and cozy, in the same way that an active volcano is warm and cozy...and always waiting to erupt!

I think this chapter really does a good job of reminding us of Carla's fierce independence and that, admirable as it is, it sometimes has its pitfalls. I completely understand where James is coming from. It's got to be hard for him. I know she feels the need to prove she can handle herself, but he wants to support her and is so frequently rebuffed. Still, I think the reasons for Carla's determination to be strong enough and do things herself are very understandable. You do a good job of navigating that gap. I feel like I can relate to all of them. Even Molly, tactless as she is, did have a point, as Carlotta herself pointed out. But she's right--it's more of a human issue than anything.

Loved the bit about Louis and his Veela powers in action. That was cute!

Thanks for another fun chapter!

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #15, by Penelope Inkwell tres

15th April 2016:
So, this was certainly an interesting chapter. It was so good to see Maddie and Kit again!

And of course Lucius and Co. had to do something shady. Of course. That said, it was milder than it might have been, I reckon. Carlotta got out mostly unscathed.

I love the running, "Oh no, is it Heidelberg?!" joke :)

My main takeaway is frustration that she can't use wizarding cures. For heaven sakes! She knows about it all. I wonder if she could, if she and James got married. It seems that if any family could be able to pull strings on such matters...

Enjoying this greatly and so excited to read on!

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #16, by Penelope Inkwell dos

15th April 2016:
I am SO EXCITED about this sequel. I'd meant to keep up with it, and then I've been on hiatus. But now I'm back and so excited to read more! I feel like i've read through the next chapter (and somehow failed to leave a review here previously! Sorry!). I don't remember totally, but I've a feeling there's at least one disaster at this dinner. Dun dun dun!

Loved seeing Carlotta in charge of the pub, turning a blind eye to the Hogwarts kids. I also loved the suggestion that she might have been a Slytherin, given my house affiliation! ;)

Eagerly looking forward to getting caught up here. I enjoyed Off the Rails so very much and am extremely excited to get to read more!

(Also, shaving your legs by magic? Best perk of being a witch ever! I'm as jealous as Carlotta!)

--Penny

 Report Review

Review #17, by Slide siete

9th April 2016:
Let's get this DONE. Wait, I'm behind on TWO? *coughs*

The village phone box in Hogsmeade has to suck. I mean, that's gonna be COLD this time of year - or wizards make it super plush and maybe like it should have an immortal madman flying around inside it. Yeah, that sounds like them. And yay on culture being another gap between Carlotta (and Muggle-borns) and wizarding society; like, surely it's not just about bloodlines and such, there is a huge CULTURAL rift between these sets of people and that has to be hard to deal with, especially when wizarding society seems to demand Muggleborns get subsumed by the wizarding world. ANYWAY story.

Having to lie to her parents has to be rough. And the absolute separation from her old life. But of course everything has to go so irritatingly real-world when parents wield siblings against you like secret, sneaky, inferiority weapons. Because stories about magic and how it's awesome and inconveniencing are better when paired with real life woes. :-D

Cannot read about Cecilia without giggling about Carlotta and the naming convention now.

I must say it's an extreme cut-off Carlotta's had to do. Understandable with James' job, though arguably HE could whisk back and forth to London, but then it's not as if she'd easily find prospects in the wizarding world better than the Three Broomsticks. No matter what she does she's going to have a foot in both worlds, but right now she's being eaten whole by one world which is never QUITE going to be hers.

You're right, Lily, stealing stationery is the God-given right to all who work in an office. Oh god, family members on the same team. It's awful, how do people cope? Imagine that Order of the Phoenix match where Ron AND the twins played? I made the horrible mistake in Not Fade Away of having both Mulcibers and both Carrows in the Quidditch team, Slytherin must have been weeping with confusion.

I don't know who Lily gets this compulsiveness from. If Hermione were a blood relative... then again I guess Molly could be like a WHIRLWIND when trying to sort stuff, so Lily must get it from her grandmother.

Ahh, parents. Good stuff! And excellent portrayals of the troubles in integrating in the magical world.

 Report Review

Review #18, by knknechtel ocho

5th April 2016:
Oh my gosh, Ryan. I think I'm in love. I get super excited every time this is updated. It's definitely my favorite on my reading list!!! I can't wait until the quidditch match comes up. That will be great. I vote it goes on for days. And more Ryan. Make him ref or something. He's just too awesome to ignore.
I love the fact James is so trouble maker-ey yet he tries to punish people. I wouldn't take him seriously either. Regardless it makes me laugh. By the way, I still think Brigid is pregnant. I feel like that's the only reason she wouldn't play, short of death. But if I'm right I'm very excited cuz that would be adorable. Babies are cute and I like to steal them... So I will come to the figurative world and steal the baby and Ryan. Cuz I'm obsessed with him.
Okay most of this has been pointless talk. But I love your story and everything about it and I can't wait until you update again! Also I'm glad McLaggen got out of Enlgands team cuz he's a jerk. And I love the fact every Weasley was on the Quidditch teams at once and how it's "Weasley Fest". It's all too great! So I'm in favor of more Quidditch and more Ryan cuz it's great! Okay, I'll be gone now.

Author's Response: Ah, Ryan is one of my favourites I think, he's so cheeky! I'm really looking forward to the Quidditch match, I've got no idea how it's going to pan out yet though... And yeah, James probably has no authority as a teacher! But as Quidditch Coach he can probably get away with it ... just about. Thanks for reviewing! :)

 Report Review

Review #19, by TillyPotter ocho

5th April 2016:
Hi :)
I started reading the first story of this last week... and now I'm all up to date!
I absolutely love everything about this story, you're a fantastic writer and the characters are all brilliant. I'm not very good at giving reviews, and I also tend to read many chapters in one sitting, so I'm sorry, but I do really love it!
I hope your family member gets better soon, can't wait to keep reading the story.

Thanks!! :)

Author's Response: Thanks very much for your review, I'm so glad you enjoyed Off the Rails and hopefully more Derailed updates will come soon :)

 Report Review

Review #20, by madness ocho

4th April 2016:


Author's Response: Thanks for the review :)

 Report Review

Review #21, by blackzero ocho

4th April 2016:
Thanks for the update. The whole Ryan-Carlota conversation was superb. The conversation made them both realised how much Della and James made them complete You are a magician with words.Again a big thank-you for the update

Author's Response: I love writing Carla's interactions with people she doesn't talk to quite so much, like Ryan. They both managed to help each other out without realising it here! Thanks for reviewing :)

 Report Review

Review #22, by blackzero siete

26th March 2016:
What I can feel that James and Carlotta are going for a breakup.Thanks for the effort and time you put you on it.

Author's Response: Don't worry, a breakup is definitely not on the cards for them! They have their troubles but they'll work through them. :) Thanks for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #23, by Illioise siete

7th March 2016:
I love your story. And I loved the bigger on the inside bit, my immediate thought before reading the next lines was that someone should paint it blue xD

Author's Response: I amused myself writing that part, tee hee. Thanks for reviewing! :)

 Report Review

Review #24, by Slide seis

15th February 2016:
*staggers in* I'M HERE. And now I need to remember what's going on. OH YES DRAMA.

Good for James for acknowledging fault, good for James for defending his right to make his own choices. Entirely understandable Carlotta can't just go OH OKAY. This is sad but also delicious. Because I'm mean.

YES Lily, STEAL the Prime Minister's stationery! Stationery is very important. OH it's the Quidditch idea you mentioned. Yesss. Oh NO FRED ISN'T THERE TO BE BEATER WITH GEORGE. *throws everything out the window* I wonder if he can play with his son. That would be nice. Or Quidditch is too painful - you know I could just read on, you've probably thought about this.

Poor Carla, having to catch up with the Quidditch family tradition. Woe betide anyone marrying into the family who's NOT a Quidditch nut. I wonder if your weird family Quidditch correlation thing was intentional or another weird moment?

*gasp* Scorpius doesn't have a Weasley jumper? SCANDAL. Keep him as a substitute, anyway, Lily, no problems there.

Yess, go Lily, exploit your family's fame for a good cause. Good girl.

Haha, Ginny's woes about being outplayed by her sons being trumped by Angelina. Yeah, poor girl. I do love Angelina. Ooh, drama for Brie. Mystery! I love mystery, I get to make madcap theories. I HAVE ONE but we'll see how it pans out. At least this fixes the Scorpius issue. FOR NOW. HA, he's already suffering.

Oh no, Brigid is legit TROUBLED by this mysterious non-Quidditch thing. My theories begin to flounder. But OH WELL Scorpius is talking I better pay attention. Poor kid, it's pretty understandable, and honestly, if being a berk when he was eleven is the worst thing he's done, the Malfoy family is improving by leaps and bounds. It's not a hanging offence.

D'aww, Scorose. I struggle with other Scoroses (I DON'T LIKE CHANGE), so I'm glad I'm getting over that. It's nice they're happy and NORMAL.

oh GOD I forgot about Hugo and Alice I must now go scourge my brain sorry review over BYE. Good Stuff!

 Report Review

Review #25, by Amanda, your biggest fan x siete

29th January 2016:
Two things: one, I hardly ever take the time to review a story. The ONLY times I do is if they're well written-- much like yours! Two, I prefer Marauder Era fiction with Sirius/OC pairings. The only other next-gen fics I've read were written by Slide. But I digress.

Essentially, what I'm getting at is this; you're a delightfully skilled writer. I thoroughly enjoyed Off The Rails and (as it turns out) and Derailed has entrapped me as well! SO. It claims that the last update was in December. I'm going to need you to stop being selfish amd give your faithful readers a rewarding chapter. Plus, I'm having withdrawls without said chapter. A little empathy perhaps??

xx
Your patiently awaiting fan,

Amansa

Author's Response: Thanks ever so much for the review! I can only apologise for the slow updates; these days I work abroad in the tourism industry and it doesn't really lend itself to much free time to write! But rest assured, James and Carlotta's story is still desperate to be told, and I'll do my best to put some more updates out soon! :)

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>