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Reading Reviews for Memories
  
14 Reviews Found

Review #1, by merlins beard Harry

4th May 2015:
Hi. It took me forever to get here, but I finally made it.
This story is so pretty. It paints all the nice pictures of Harry and Ginny's lives. I like how much attention you pay to details.
I really like it, but there's something about it that irritates me a little. I can't quite pinpoint it but it has something to do with the plot (which, of course is missing a little because it's just quick captures of single moments)
Since I don't even know what I'm saying, and I still enjoyed reading this immensely, just ignore my crazy brain playing tricks on me.

I'll be back on your AP soon to check out what else you've come up with.

Love
~Anja

Author's Response: Hey Anja! Thanks so much for leaving a review! Feel free to let me know if you think of what the thing is. I want to make my stories as good as possible.
Thanks again,
~Panda


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Review #2, by Your Secret Santa Harry

24th December 2014:
Hey, it's Santa again :)
Again, I really love this idea for a story, and that, whilst both Harry and Ginny are remembering how they came together, and how they love each other, they're reliving two completely different moments - a war and a wedding. I think the quotes were used in a very skilled way - they fit in nicely with the rest of the writing, and didn't stick out as being from something else. Sometimes that doesn't quite happen when people use quotes from other books/films etc., so I commend you on that :)
Like I said, I really enjoyed reading your piece, and I though it was a very well constructed story. I apologise for not making my reviews longer after I've made you wait neary a week for them, but I confess I've never been the best of reviewers ;S
Just know that your writing was fabulous and I thoroughly enjoyed it!

From Santa xxx

Author's Response: Hey Santa!
Thanks again! I'm not the best reviewer, or review responder for that matter, either so I understand your struggles. I feel ya. :)
Thanks for popping in!
~Panda


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Review #3, by Your Secret Santa Ginny

24th December 2014:
Hello! Bringing you reviews as part of your Secret Santa gift ;)
I love this idea for a short story - I, personally, have never been married, but I think that this is a very realistic portrait of a bride's emotions on her wedding day. The way she's excited, and is full of anticipation for the wedding, but can't help being a bit worried along with it - I think it's perfect.
I also love the voice of the wizard performing the marriage - it's still possible to work out what he's trying to say, but it certainly made me laugh several times reading it. I think it definitely suited Harry and Ginny's wedding, making it a light-hearted, joyful occasion.
Just a tiny, tiny thing - feel free to ignore me and think I'm a pedantic idiot, but you missed out a capital letter on 'Bill' towards the end. Like I said, feel free to ignore, but I've just edited some of my own work, so I'm in a picky mood at the moment ;)

On to the next chapter!
Santa :)

Author's Response: Hi Santa!
Thanks for dropping by! I appreciate all the kind things you said about the story. I don't get a lot of reviews, so when I do it's a real treat!
Thanks for pointing out the capitalization issue! This is the very first story I uploaded, and before I figured out the magic of Beta Editors. I've gotten several edits I need to fix, but I never get around to doing it! Maybe when the que opens again.
Anyways thanks for dropping by!
~Panda


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Review #4, by Infinityx Ginny

9th September 2014:
Hi Panda! Here for the September BvB.

This is just really cute. Like, heartwarming, ice-melting cute. I love how you've focused on Harry/Ginny in such a sweet manner. Most people don't like the pairing due to misconstrued reasons but I think they really make a wonderful couple.

It makes sense for Harry to propose on the pitch. Quidditch is a sport that they both love and it was such a lovely moment as well. I would like a bit more background on the match though. Since Ginny was in her Harpies uniform, and Harry came flying down as well, were they playing against each other or something? I'm not able to picture that properly so a little more detail would be nice. :)

I'm quite sure my face had a look of horror when I pictured that poofy dress. So not Ginny! I love how she selects a simpler one and alters it to suit her. You've stayed true to Ginny's character and I love that. :)

Haha, the ceremony was brilliant! I love how you've used the Princess Bride quote in this! It flowed perfectly and added just the right amount of humor to that beautiful setting.

The only CC I have is that there are some minor problems with the punctuation, and you've missed out on the capitalization of a few letters.

But apart from that, this was lovely. Great job!

Author's Response: Hey there! Thanks so much for this lovely review! Not a lot of people read/review my stories so whenever I get one it always makes me really happy. I'm glad that you liked the story, and I see what you mean about the game. I'll go back and look at that once RL clears up a bit. I'll also fix those small edits you gave me at the end.
Thank you so much for reviewing!
~Panda


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Review #5, by Veritaserum27 Harry

10th June 2014:
Hi!

Here for the BvB review battle.

This was so cute! What a great way to incorporate both of those quotes! They fit perfectly into Harry's bedtime story. I was really worried at first, because I thought that the story of how Harry defeated Voldemort might be too scary to tell little James before bed, but this was fantastic.

I always imagined Harry had a great sense of humor with his kids and you fit my head canon perfectly! I also really liked the little moments with Ginny. It was so sweet how he kissed her hair and they sat so close on the couch together.

Good job and I look forward to more of your "Memories" stories!

Beth

Author's Response: Thank you Beth for this sweet review! I'm glad that you enjoyed this story.

~Panda


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Review #6, by Veritaserum27 Ginny

4th June 2014:
Hi Panda,

Here for the BvB review battle!

This was so cute. I mean it was really, really adorable! You were so true to Harry and Ginny's characters that I could see it all happening as if I were there.

The first part where he proposed was perfect. Harry and Ginny got together the first time over a quidditch match and they both had a fierce love for the sport, so it was only fitting that he proposed on the pitch.

The scene with the bridal shop actually scared me. When you were describing that one dress, I was thinking to myself "that is totally NOT Ginny's style" and then poof out comes the perfect dress!

I could also picture what Ginny looked like on her wedding day. The image of her simple dress and hairstyle fit perfectly in my head, I also love that you had them get married at Hogwarts. It really was Harry's first real home and he loved it so much.

There was one part where I think you accidentally repeated a few lines during the marriage ceremony: "As Ginny thought of this her mind started wandering towards the man standing next her. She still couldn't believe Harry was hers. It was a childish dream that she had given up on, and then one day he was there. For her. Forever.
Ginny's mind started wandering towards the man standing next her. She still couldn't believe Harry was hers. It was a childish dream that she had given up on, and then one day he was there. For her. Forever."

I loved the line, but it takes away from the beauty of it when it is repeated.

This was a great story to fit with the quote. I LOVE The Princess Bride. Nice job!

Beth

Author's Response: Thanks for this sweet review Beth! I am really happy that you liked it! I'll go fix that repeated line right now, thanks for pointing that out to me!
Thanks again,
~Panda


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Review #7, by toomanycurls Harry

24th May 2014:
Hello again!!!

You do a great job showing Harry with James. I love the bed time story idea - it pays such a nice homage to how the book was done (Princess Bride that is).

Harry's retelling of him defeating Voldemort is great. I LOVED how you used your quotes. You picked great ones to fit in with the revenge theme for Harry and Voldemort. Ending it with the "death cannot stop true love" was absolutely perfect.

Thank you so much for writing such an entertaining entry for the Princess Bride Challenge! I'll be posting the results soon!

-Rose

Author's Response: Thanks again for this review Rose! Or I guess this would be plain old thanks if you don't count the other review. Anyway...THANKS!
I am glad that you enjoyed this chapter, I've gotten mixed reviews on it. Thanks for thinking of the brilliant idea to do this challenge. I had a lot of fun working on it!
~Panda


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Review #8, by toomanycurls Ginny

24th May 2014:
Hello! I'm sorry it's taking me so long but I'm finally reviewing the entries for the Princess Bride Quote Challenge.

I love that you used the Impressive Clergyman for your quote! I giggled during that entire scene - you conveyed Harry and Ginny's reactions to that so well. You also did a great job describing the multitude of emotions on one's wedding day. I love that you showed their apprehension as well as their love for one another - great mix!

I'm excited to reach the next chapter!

-Rose

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review! I enjoyed writing that scene so I am glad that you enjoyed it!
Thanks,
~Panda


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Review #9, by randomwriter Ginny

5th May 2014:
Hello :) I saw your status and thought that I would surprise you with a review! :)

I really liked the idea behind this story. I thought it was really sweet. Harry and Ginny have been through so much during the war, and they definitely deserve their share of happiness. I'm glad to see that they finally found their peace and contentment with each other.

These moments are like missing moments, but not quite. We know that sometime between the ending of the war and the epilogue, Harry and Ginny get married, but we've never really gotten any update from JKR about the same, so I guess it's up to our imaginations. I like that you decided to write about this. I was surprised to see that Harry's proposal was so public, because I didn't pin him down to be that kinda guy, but it was a really cute proposal and any girl would probably be hard pressed to say no when she's caught between the love of her life, and the other love of her life (Quidditch). So even though this was highly public, I think it can be overlooked because it was sweet and well-done :)

As for concrit, I must say that I did spot a few grammatical errors. I also saw some errors in punctuation and also a couple of places where you'd used a certain word wrongly. I'm sure that you could get a beta to look this chapter over, and you should be okay :)

Another thing was the characterisation. It wasn't really too off, to be honest. But I'm a huge canon nut and even the smallest things tend to bug me, so this may be me being too nitpicky. Anyway, my point is that the characterisation was ever so slightly off in some places.

I really liked the flow, and even though this was a short chapter, you managed to pack in quite a lot. I really liked how you described everything. It wasn't overly descriptive, but you gave enough details to keep the reader interested. Good work :)

Author's Response: Hmmm...I had a feeling I was going to get more reviews after that status. Thank you so much for this review and spending so much time to write such a quality review. I agree looking back on it that the proposal was probably more public than Harry would have done, but at the time it was so sweet I couldn't not do it.
Thanks for the note or grammar, punctuation, and characterization. I'll get a beta to help me with that. Thanks for letting me know!
I know I've said thank you a to of times already in this response but I'm going to say it again...thank you!
I hope you are having a good day,
~Panda Weasley


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Review #10, by marauderfan Harry

5th May 2014:
This is interesting! I never really expected Harry to be the type to tell stories about the war to his kids, like he kind of wanted to just ignore his hero status or something, but I kind of like how you've written it as an abridged (probably without all the violence, and extolling the heroism of everyone else involved!) story he tells his son ALL THE TIME. And actually I could totally see that happening. My dad has a story he tells way too much and so I could really sympathise with James :p Anyway, I liked that angle.

Omg, I'm kind of dying here at how you incorporated SO MANY PRINCESS BRIDE QUOTES. Hahaa... Voldemort the six fingered man better watch out.

I think it shows the battle in a really interesting light. I mean, obviously this was a heartbreaking, horrible experience for Harry to go through, but since he's telling it as a bedtime story to his son he has to make it less horrifying and more awesome-sounding. It's odd to read the battle with a touch of humour in it, but given the circumstances of your story, it fits.

If I might make a suggestion - you might want to watch out for commas, such as in places like this: James was lying on the soft, carpeted, floor, of the living room -- you don't need a comma after the last adjective in the list, or after the noun. So it could be like this: "James was lying on the soft, carpeted floor of the living room".

Good work on this story! :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for this review! I agree about what you are saying about Harry and the war stories, I feel the same way. I originally wasn't going to do it like this but I really wanted that scene. Thanks for the note about the commas, I've been told before I need to watch out for them and it's always helpful to be reminded from time to time. Thank you again!
~Panda Weasley


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Review #11, by luvinpadfoot Harry

5th May 2014:
Ah the Princess Bride is one of my favorite movies/books! William Goldman is a fantastic writer and I just had to see what you wrote. It was brilliant! You tied so many quotes in. I just loved them! And it was so impressive how many you used and yet it still made sense. Especially repurposing Inigo's iconic line for Harry. That was brilliant.

The relationship between Ginny and Harry was so sweet. The fairytale elements you worked in tied in beautifully with their story. I could just imagine them as Westley and Buttercup, true love overcoming everything. Not even death can stand in the way of them. ;) (Perfect use of that quote, by the way. I think it was my favorite in the whole piece.)

The part with James was adorable! He's so cute in here, especially the little annoyance with Harry telling the same story over and over. I couldn't help but giggle at him. And Ginny at the end was great characterization on your part. I like that she sided with James over her husband.

Great story! You definitely did all those quotes justice! :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review! It really made my day (and no I am not just saying that, it really did!). I am sort of impressed myself by how many quotes I was able to fit in...I was almost worried that I put to many in! I really appreciate the time you put into this review, thank you so much!
~Panda Weasley


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Review #12, by marauderfan Ginny

5th May 2014:
Hello :)

Oh, this was such a cute look into Ginny's memories of her wedding! I love the bit when they're looking for wedding dresses and Hermione finds the hideously fluffy one. And then at the wedding, I liked that you touched on Ginny's nervousness - yes she is marrying the man of her dreams who she's had a crush on since age ten, but I think it's probably pretty normal for her to be nervous on her wedding day!

Hahaha, I LOVE that you got that quote for the challenge :D Every time I watch that movie I giggle at that part because it's so ridiculous. I like how Harry and Ginny had to look away from each other there so they wouldn't laugh as well :p You incorporated the quote really well. It would certainly make theirs a memorable wedding!

(Also, I love that bit at the end, especially because yesterday was Star Wars Day so I like that nod to the Empire Strikes Back :p)

Lovely work!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review! I had a lot of fun writing this and I am glad you enjoyed it! I didn't realize that I sub-consciously made a Star Wars reference...lol.
Thanks again for your review,
~Panda Weasley


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Review #13, by Ravenclaw333 Ginny

4th May 2014:
This is such a sweet little piece, and I love the 'missing moments' from the canon, like Harry's proposal and the ceremony itself - I love the connection between Harry's proposal on the Quidditch pitch and their first kiss after the Quidditch game in Half-Blood Prince - it's really something that brings them together, so I loved that little touch! You've characterised them well, particularly the relationship and the things that make them Harry and Ginny - the inside jokes, the reference to Ginny's crush - and I loved the "I love you," "I know," exchange - it was a really nice way to finish off. A lovely piece :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review. It really means a lot to me and I really appreciate the feedback!
~Panda Weasley


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Review #14, by XxImAgInAiReXx Ginny

6th April 2014:
blue vs. bronze battle :)

This is a pretty nostalgic piece about what happened after the war with Harry and Ginny. It's pretty feel-good :) it made me smile when Ginny was going through the pictures in the album. I liked the memories you came up with as well--how Harry proposed to Ginny, finding the wedding dress, and the wedding itself.

But let's get down to business (and defeat the huns)

The most obvious thing I can think of right now to criticize is that Harry and Ginny had no reaction when the man started speaking in the way he did. I know it's a part of The Princess Bride quote, but I think they would have noticed and had a good laugh about it behind the dude's back. I also think that you could have made it a different speaker than the one who spoke at Bill and Fleur's wedding, because how did he start speaking like that? Maybe it's the old age.

Grammar and Punctuation-one specific example of punctuation I didn't really like was in here--"Oh Ginny I can't get over the fact that my little baby darling is getting married!!!" The sentence is fine, but using three exclamation points is a bit excessive, I feel. It just bothers me. It's not a big thing, but usually it's less distracting for the reader to only have one punctuation mark at the end. Also, for a more nitpickier thing, I think dogeared should have a dash, like this: dog-eared. Also, here: "Now it's come true, it's like a fairy tail!" Tail should be spelled like tale.

Pacing-pretty good. I didn't feel like the story was overly rushed except at the end. I thought you could have spent some more time on Ginny's thoughts and feelings when the man is speaking. Basically, it's the matter of putting in a couple of sentences chalk full of adjectives and feelings.

Whew. Okay. Overall, this was fun to read, and I enjoyed it. I hope you keep writing, it seems like you're off to a great start :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! You're really the first person to give me feedback on this and I will make sure to fix those edits you gave me! I really appreciate the time you put into this review for me and all the awesome feedback. Thanks again! :)
~Panda Weasley


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