Reading Reviews for Founding Hogwarts
25 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ginnypotter242 Provence

12th June 2015:
Okay, so I wasn't sure what perspective you were going to do for the last chapter, and I read the first couple lines and just immediately went SORTING HAT! I can safely say that I've never read from the Sorting Hat's perspective before- though I did write a rather lovely conversation between him and James II. You did it really well though! The personality of it was enough to make me realize who was peaking from the first couple lines- which is impressive, since I didn't know the Sorting Hat had a personality.
I never realized how big of a job the Sorting Hat has. Not only dos he have to sort hundreds of students each year, but he has to warn people of upcoming dangers- no pressure or anything. The Sorting Hat, an oracle- I never though of it that way! It's really good though, and fits prefectly with what he (it?) does.

I really liked this story! I never read much Founders, but this had a very nice touch to it. The second person was really well written, and it flowed well throughout the whole story. I'm glad I read this Mallory! (And please excuse my mini Hufflepuff rant)

~Sara (Gryffindor, House Cup 2015)

Author's Response: SURPRISE!! Sorty makes an appearance! To be honest, I was feeling lost on what to do for the fifth one, because I wanted to do all the movements for the song I was assigned but I didn't want to do some random OC, you know? So when the idea for the Sorting Hat hit my, I was really excited!

Thanks so much! I think the Sorting Hat definitely would've had a personality--maybe a little more serious than the one I wrote, but the Hat would've been ready to deconstruct all the portents of evil that they were detecting for sure!

They do have quite a big job! (Sorry, I try to keep from gendering them because Hats don't necessarily identify with gender--weird, I know, but that's just what it is.) Yeah, they definitely act as an oracle in this story--I drew inspiration from the songs they sings in the books as the material keeps getting darker and darker.

Thanks again!! No, I enjoyed your Hufflepuff rant! You're awesome for sticking with this story through five chapters. :)


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Review #2, by ginnypotter242 Alsace-Lorraine

12th June 2015:
You know, it seems rather fitting that Rowena Ravenclaw is a bit of a feminist. You described her really well, and I love that you made her wise, not smart. The fact that she is curious and wants to learn about the world truly show Ravenclaw nature. Ravenclaw's story with her husband and daughter is sweet, and her thoughts when her daughter came into the world were perfect.

I loved her thoughts on gender. Like I said, it's fitting for her, and the way you wrote it it seems like a flawless characteristic of hers. It just seems obvious that "duh, of course she's a feminist" especially as her views on gender weren't really widely accepted in that time period. (To be honest, I'm kind of imagining her and Godric getting into an argument and singing the song "Anything you can do, I can do better")
This was a great chapter, and really well described for Ravenclaw :)

~Sara (Gryffindor, House Cup 2015)

Author's Response: Of course Rowena's a feminist--I put a little too much of myself into her, honestly. :)

She is not the all-knowing pillar of wisdom that she seems to be in the books, but here she's learning and ready to absorb all the knowledge she can. I wanted to put her more in the style of Luna Lovegood rather than the stodgy portrayals that show up far too often. I'm so happy that you liked the story with her family. Sometimes I feel like it was too cheesy, but it relieves me that someone else liked it!

She is probably far too progressive for the Middle Ages, but that's the fun of magic. She's well ahead of her time, and you're right--she and Godric would probably get into battles about their views of gender (though I'd like to think that he'll come around to see her point of view on some issues).

Thanks again for some wonderful reviews!


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Review #3, by ginnypotter242 Île-de-France

12th June 2015:
I feel like Hufflepuff is the hardest house to truly describe, since it gets so little attention in the fandom. But you did a wonderful job describing Helga and what would end up being Hufflepuff House. I really liked that you showed that Hufflepuff was not all sugar and rainbows, and that Helga had seen dark things in her past. The fact that you gave her that past allowed her to need to forgive, no matter the circumstances. You showed the Hufflepuff traits well, even those that are typically associated with Gryffindor (because to be honest, people usually associate any good trait with Gryffindor, which isn't right). This was a really good way of showing the power of Hufflepuff. I also really liked her thoughts as she watches the students, and the factthat she hears music from the din. Honestly, from the very first sentence, this whole chapter screamed HUFFLEPUFF to me! Great job.
Also, I really want your second person writing skills. I'm jealous!

~Sara (Gryffindor, House Cup 2015)

Author's Response: Hufflepuff is so hard to write about because I love Hufflepuffs to death but ALL THE STEREOTYPES!!! They definitely deserve more attention, yes.

Helga is definitely not all sugar and rainbows, as you said! Unlike Salazar, however, she has the power of forgiveness on her side--though she's learning from her experiences and isn't likely to forget. Hufflepuff has many more "good traits" than people attribute to them, and they can be super incredible--but sadly overlooked.

Thanks again!


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Review #4, by ginnypotter242 Bretagne

12th June 2015:
Okay, I don't know how you are writing all of this in second person! It works so well, and it doesn't seem awkward or choppy like 2nd person pov usually does.

You did amazing with characterizing Salazar. You showed the traits of Slytherin so well, and everything that we know of them. Cunning, ambitious, using any means to achieve their ends- you touched on it all, but it wasn't forced which is even better. I liked how you gave a reason for Salazar's personality, and had him make his his father his hero. It showed the side of the typical 'pure blood Slytherin' that is cold and aloof, but made it so he wasn't cruel or unloving.
I also liked that you gave Salazar a reason for disliking Muggles and Muggleborns (however weak that argument may be). So many people just have him randomly disliking those of lesser blood, without actually giving him any reason to do so to such extremes.
Your characterization was spot on in this one! Great job :)

~Sara (Gryffindor, House Cup 2015)

Author's Response: I just enjoy second person PoV. :)

Thanks! Salazar was a tricky beast to write, because I didn't want to make him seem "evil," but he wasn't really an innocent either. I really played up the ambition and I wanted to make his father the reason for it. I feel like Salazar probably had daddy issues in that he sees his father as a hero but his father has expectations that baby-Salazar can't live up to. And so he spends all his time trying to live up to it after his father dies.

Yeah, his argument is weak. But there had to be a reason, and that was it. Even if it was stupid. (Stupid Salazar--get over yourself!)

Thanks so much!


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Review #5, by ginnypotter242 Normandie

12th June 2015:
Mallory! Ooh, a founders fic, I haven't read one of these in ages. I really liked that you did it in second person- that's so difficult to do, but you pulled it off really well! I liked how you wrote out the thoughts of Gryffindor, how he reflected back on both his childhood and the strangeness of magic as well as building Hogwarts. I never thought about the founder's blood, but it sort of makes sense for Godric Gryffindor to be a muggleborn, considering the rivalry with Slytherin. I wish this was longer, because I want to read more! This was really great, and I loved Godric's personality. It was very fitting to what we know of him and Gryffindor traits, as well as the time period he's in. Really great job on this chapter!

~Sara (Gryffindor, House Cup 2015)

Author's Response: Sara!

Founders fics are rare gems and I want to read more of them. Writing one was a blast. Second person actually wasn't too bad for me, but it was tricky trying to think in the frame of a second person narrator at first. I wanted Godric to be Muggleborn in order to highlight the differences between him and Salazar--he's got a different set of worries, so his life experiences are different.

Thanks again!


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Review #6, by patronus_charm Provence

11th July 2014:
Ooh, I had been wondering who on earth the fifth chapter could be about, so I loved the twist of it being about the sorting hat and it being in first person pov too instead of second.

I really liked how he gave us a short snippet of his life as it was actually rather interesting seeing it from his insight. I really liked the brief description of the maker and this line ‘Passive he lived, passive he died, just like the dull grey things that he fabricated.’ Really stuck with me throughout as it almost as if the sorting hat was filled with disdain at his lowly origins when he had risen to such greatness later on. Anyhow, I still really enjoyed his narration as it seemed more humorous than the others.

Can I just say congrats on finishing and making each chapter 500 words and still have it feel as if it were a full and complete story? It’s quite a hard feat so I’m feeling very impressed right now :D

House Cup 2014 Review!

Author's Response: Yep, old Sorty's at it again! :D

I wanted this chapter to be different from the others because it's from the PoV of an object that didn't actually found Hogwarts, so to speak. But there were five movements in the song that I was given for the Instrumental Song Challenge, and I couldn't just let the fifth movement go to waste! So I chose the Sorting Hat, and then I came up with the idea for the Hat to be the narrator of the whole story--of course, he's talking to each Founder in apostrophe, but that's what they would have heard, had they put the Hat on their heads. :)

I like backstories! And I felt that Sorty deserved one, too. He was quite disdainful of his creator, but I think it was more out of his enjoyment of being sentient than anything else, really. Hats are not reliable narrators, after all! :D

Thank you so much! It was a fun challenge to make each of these chapters exactly 500 words as I didn't have tons of time to write the story. So when I wrote, I wrote with the goal of completing a chapter in 500 words. After five chapters, I was getting the hang of it. :)

Thanks so very much for all of your extremely wonderful reviews!!


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Review #7, by patronus_charm Alsace-Lorraine

11th July 2014:
Woah, so many feels from this and I loved how you included society’s views of women at the time as it was just a really interesting twist!

At first I was all like you go girl with the way Rowena chose to rebel against her upper class family and the expectations which came with that and chose her own path. One thing which struck me was how she never regretted that decision, that decision to be independent and free, and I really liked that, as it just showed the individuality of Ravenclaw and how they would never cave to society’s pressures.

When her husband died is when I when I got all feelsy with the way those horrible men couldn’t accept the fact that women could be strong, could be brave, could be in charge too, and even though Rowena tried to fight them showing her Claw like side, she had the sense to withdraw and move away, and that was shown through the love of her daughter which was another really nice twist to include.

I really liked this little snippet of Rowena :D

House Cup 2014 Review!

Author's Response: I have a tendency to include society's views of women in my stories. ;)

As a Ravenclaw, I wanted to be sure that I did my own Founder some justice! Rowena Ravenclaw is a lot more like Luna Lovegood than Cho Chang, in my opinion. She would rather have the freedom to create and explore the world than to be trapped in social expectations or the bitter pain of losing someone she loved (which isn't to say that she didn't regret her husband's passing, but she didn't let it define her life).

YES WOMEN ARE STRONG TOO!!! Stupid medieval men. Rowena could have made them see sense with some magic, but she knew that it would be far wiser to get out. Helena was her pride and joy, after all. :)

Thanks for another great review!!


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Review #8, by patronus_charm Île-de-France

11th July 2014:
Hi, I thought I would use this task as a chance to come and finish reading this story!

Ok, this chapter gave me so many happy and fuzzy feels it made me want to go and join Hufflepuff because Helga was so lovely and so sweet she really did the house proud. She was just so understanding with the way she got why Muggles didn’t like them as they were scared, and took the time to try and understand them. You often don’t find that with magical people as they overlook Muggles, so seeing this different reaction here was really lovely.

I think the thing which made me most proud was that she didn’t care that Salazar had sneered at her, and put her down in a way, as she had her band of yellow people and that’s what made her happy. It was just such a lovely thought without any malice any at all and I just want to give her a hug! ♥

House Cup 2014 Review!

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you for being so dedicated and finishing my story. :D

Helga is a lovely woman. She's definitely not a pushover, but she's the most welcoming and approachable of all the Founders, I think. She's also empathetic in my mind, so I wanted to show how her understanding of Muggles influenced her beliefs.

Yep, Salazar can go jump in a lake, for all she cares. If he's going to be rude to her "yellow people," then he can get out. :)

Thanks for your review! :D


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Review #9, by blackballet Normandie

19th June 2014:
Hi there! I'm here from the review battle on the forums.

This was a great characterization of Godric Gryffindor. I love it when authors describe a character without saying directly I have red hair, I have green eyes, I'm 5"2, etc. (I still have trouble with it, but your imagery is SO spot on.

I also loved the third person narrative you have going on here. It gave me the sense that Gryffindor was watching over an opening feast one night. The jab at Salazar was great too, as it gave you a sense of rebellion coming from Gryffindor, which is so like the house.

This is so great, and I'm thinking I will be reading and reviewing your next couple of chapters soon!


Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for the review!

Yeah, I read fanfiction for several months before I started writing it, and one thing that I saw a lot was the "telling" of physical characteristics. I promised myself that I would try not to do that if possible. :) Don't worry--it takes a bit of practice to get characterization exactly where you want it. I'm still working on it! Thanks so much for pointing my characterization of Godric out. :)

Thank you! I wanted to try something different for this story, so I wrote it in second person PoV--hence the use of "you" so very often. Godric definitely watches over everyone like the protector he is, and even though he and Salazar are buddies, he never misses an opportunity for a jest at his friend's expense. :)

Thank you so, so much! I hope that my incredible tardiness with this response has not deterred you from wishing to read on. :)


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Review #10, by patronus_charm Bretagne

7th June 2014:
Hi there!

Wow, I thought considering the whole chapter was 500 words, this was an excellent character study of Salazar! I really liked the idea of his father and how he was this hero and how Salazar looked up to him, as it showed how much power had played a role in his life from the beginning and perhaps shows why he was so against Muggleborns because by dominating him he would get power and it was just really interesting to analyse.

The use of second person POV was really excellent here as it showed a new side to Salazar with the way it times it felt as if the narrator was talking to him and encouraging him along and that level of complexity was really cool. Also, it made the story seem almost poetic and enchanting and added to the descriptions!

I really liked the bit when you mentioned why he joined the school as there were some very ominous undertones there with the way he was talking about how they would see the importance of blood purity later on. Speaking more of the ominous notes, you did a really good job weaving them in throughout the story that we really got to see the cold and calculating side to Salazar.

I can’t think of much else to say but this was a really fantastic chapter and insight into his mind!


Author's Response: Hello!

Before I wrote this, I hadn't really thought much about Salazar Slytherin, pre-Hogwarts and pre-schism. When I sat down to write about him, I wanted an explanation for his "evil"-ness that is shown so often. His father seemed to offer that explanation for me. Like Draco Malfoy, Salazar was influenced by the views of his father. He knew no other life, and there was no one around to open his eyes until he was far too set in his thinking. Also, believing that the Muggles were the reason for the crumbling of the House of Slytherin sort of added to it...

Thank you!! It was my first attempt at second person PoV, so I'm super pleased to hear that you thought it was good. Oooh, poetic?! I didn't mean to do that, but gosh, thanks!! I'm blushing. ^.^

I tried to weave in the foreshadowing for what we all know will be his departure from the school in such a way that it didn't overwhelm the original intent of the story. After all, this is only the beginning of Hogwarts, so his awful departure is yet to come. :)

Thanks so much for your awesome review! :D


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Review #11, by kenpo Provence

25th March 2014:
I'm not a fan of this movement, but what you've written really goes perfectly with it!!

AHHA! I WAS RIGHT ABOUT THE HAT. WOOT. WOOT. WOOT. (does a little dance because it's about celebrating the little victories).

The very end of the song is almost a sort of celebration, and that's sort of what this is. I love that the Hat is so proud of what he is (I guess I've assigned it a gender). I also really love that he was the speaker! It makes such perfect sense!!

So, some general notes about all of them:

I think you did a really good job at showing the traits of each person without it being super obvious and cheesy and cookie-cutter.

Your writing style is really fun to read, and you're very good at the flow and pacing.

I think that you captured the mood of the entire song extremely well. You should be very proud of this.

I thought I'd make this longer... but I honestly don't know what else to say. So I'll leave you with another thanks for entering my challenge. Results should be up tonight!

Author's Response: I can only hope that your feelings about this movement didn't also transfer over to your feelings about my writing. :)


Yes, I thought of the Hat as a "he," too! (Darn A Very Potter Sequel for making me think that way!) But as I was writing these characters, I thought that the second person PoV would lend itself nicely to an inside voice narrating everything. And since it corresponded so nicely to the five movements of the song, I went for it!

Funny story: The woodwind faculty at my school play together in a fantabulous woodwind quintet, and I've come to see each of them as a Founder: clarinet professor=Slytherin; flute professor=Ravenclaw; horn professor=Gryffindor; bassoon professor=Hufflepuff; and oboe professor=the Sorting Hat. And it totally works, too, because the genders all match up (except that the oboe professor is female). So there's a tangent for you! But they were sort of an inspiration for this story, hahaha. :)

Thank you! I didn't want to give each of them the same exact story because that would be BORING. I had a lot of fun coming up with their backgrounds!

Awww, that's sooo nice! I worry a lot about how my writing flows, because it seems random sometimes. :)

Yes, I am quite proud! Thank you so much for challenging us with this challenge! I had immense amounts of fun writing the story, and I hope that you do an Instrumental Song Challenge 2.0 one day! :D

Ah, when you wrote this, you had just reviewed four other chapters. That's enough to exhaust a person! Thanks for being so wonderfully dedicated in writing all of these thoughtful comments! :D


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Review #12, by kenpo Alsace-Lorraine

25th March 2014:
This is by far my favorite movement of the song. It's ridiculous how much I love this movement. It's okay if you're not of the same opinion. It just has such a ridiculously beautiful build... the play count on it is well into the triple digits...

Okay! Story!

Once again, I think you've captured it very well. Your view of Ravenclaw is very interesting, but I like it a lot. She's such a curious mind, such an inquisitive mind, such a determined mind. I love how much of these characters you've packed into such few words!!

I'm thinking that the last chapter is from the POV of either the grounds or the castle. Or the Hat. I'll probably leave a less lame review on that chapter :p

Author's Response: Oooh, I'm so glad you like this movement! It was a fun one to write the story to. :)

Thank you!! Ravenclaw is, of course, my favorite Founder, so I had to make her interesting! Going off of one of my other stories, I made her a super-independent, determined soul. She's probably fairly anachronistic for the time period, but hey! This is the Wizarding World! We can do what we want to do, right? :)

Hahahahaha, one of those guesses is right! Also, your reviews are not lame. I enjoy all of the reviews I get, because for me, reviews are mostly rare. :D


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Review #13, by kenpo Île-de-France

25th March 2014:
Once again, I think you did a really great job capturing the mood of the song. I don't want to read the next chapter because it'll probably be sad.

I love that the music is in her head. Is that what you meant? That's awesome.

I feel so terrible for her that her parents are dead. I loved the line, though, that she was burned for practising magic and he was burned for loving her.

I like how even though she's shy and young, she stood up for what she believed in. Very Hufflepuffy.

I chuckled a little bit when you mentioned the dissonance. Did you listen to the version that's got all the movements together, with a picture of Milhaud? That's 17 minutes and 44 seconds long? Recorded by the PLU wind ensemble? If you did, then on the last note, one of the trumpets played a very very wrong note. If that's what you were referring to, that's just humorous to me because it shows how much music can be interpreted differently. Since I know that it's a wrong note, I cringe heavily. But then you brought it into the story

Sorry. I went off on a little tangent there.

Overall, once again, I really enjoyed reading this. Your writing style is a pleasure to read and each of the chapters is very distinct.

Author's Response: Thank you for another lovely review! :D

Yes, I did mean that "Ile de France" is the song that's in her head. I wanted to have at least one character hearing the music. :)

Helga Hufflepuff is such a sweetheart. I would like to think that her parents' love influenced her a lot--much like Salazar's father influenced him, but with a very different outcome. :)

Badgers are stalwart and awesome, as evidenced by the Redwall books. I read those a lot while I was growing up, and since Hufflepuff's mascot is a badger, I can't help but thinking of them all as the stubborn ones of the bunch. :)

Lol! No, that's not the one I listened to. I found it on Spotify and also bought it on iTunes because I was writing it while I was on an eight-hour band trip (ironic, huh?). The dissonance mention was merely coincidental, as I wanted to portray the tension that Helga could feel between Salazar and the others. :D

Tangents are good! I am also tangential. Tangent away!

Thanks so much, once again!


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Review #14, by kenpo Bretagne

25th March 2014:
This movement is tied for my least-favorite in the suite, but you really brought it to life here. Err.. well you didn't bring it to life, but you just sort of soaked in the bleakness of it... if that makes sense...

This portrayal of Salazar is really interesting, and your writing style is fantastic. I love how he's so focused on his father.

I don't have much to say other than this was really cool and you wrote it well.

Author's Response: Least favorite? Bo. :)

Yeah, it was pretty bleak. I liked the oboe, though. But Salazar is a pretty sad character, and I wanted this movement with all its doom and gloom to be about him. I thought that he would be very influenced by stories and lies told to him in his childhood, and boys sometimes want to be like their fathers, don't they? Well, in Salazar's mind, the stories morphed and fostered a hatred within him... Which led to ruin, unfortunately. :/

Cool? No one's ever said that about me before! :D (Well, you were actually talking about my writing, so never mind...) But thanks so much for your review!! :D


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Review #15, by kenpo Normandie

25th March 2014:
Hey, thanks so much for entering my challenge! I think I said that I'd review the first two or three chapters, but since your chapters are short (are they all 500 words without Author's Note?), I'll probably do all five. They'll just be shorter, lame reviews :p.

Random things:
I don't know if she's accepting pre-written stories, but if she is, you should enter this in patronus_charm's 2nd person POV challenge. Just sayin'.

In you're Author's Note, you say that each movement is named for a suite in France. "Suite" refers to the type/structure of the music. I think you mean to say providence.

Okay, onto the story.

I think you captured the mood of the movement really well, which is a little surprising because the song sounds distinctly French, while the story obviously takes place elsewhere.

I loved the line "flaming locks of rust". You wrote this very well. I love reading your writing.

Alright. Onto chapter two! (hopefully you don't get annoyed by five short reviews rather than two longer ones...)

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you so much for your challenge and your review(s)!!

Lame reviews are better than no reviews! Also, this review wasn't lame. :P

Yeah, I think I looked at her challenge... Unfortunately, pre-written stories aren't accepted. However, it was a nice exercise for me, because it was my first try at second person POV!

Hahahahaha, FAIL. I truly didn't mean to do that! I will fix it sometime this week. :)

Thank you! Yeah, I was kind of in cognitive dissonance with the song and the content because of the setting disparity, but I just went with it. This movement sounds SO Gryffindorian to me, so I wanted him to head the whole story up. :)

Augggh, thank you! It's compliments like yours that make a "blah" day much better. :D

By all means, read on!


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Review #16, by HEG Provence

25th March 2014:
The sorting hat! Why didn't I think if that before? I really l0ve this UnluckyStar57 thank you for writing it :)

Author's Response: Indeed! The Sorting Hat! He's a super important character, especially in those early days when the Founders were trying to decide how to Sort people.

You're so welcome, HEG!! I am glad that you loved it! Thanks for sticking with it for all five chapters!!! :D


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Review #17, by HEG Alsace-Lorraine

25th March 2014:
Ravenclaw! The last founder! I expect all will be revealed in the last chapter - I can't wait! I love the description in all these chapters you've written I can almost imagine Ravenclaw telling Gryffindor to go to bed. She is the clever one after all. I still have no idea who is speaking. That is what I love about this story - it is so unpredictable! Very well written ,

Author's Response: Indeed! The last Founder of my story is Ravenclaw, mostly because the music of the Alsace-Lorraine movement of "Suite Francaise" matched my image of her so well!

I am so glad that you liked my description! Ravenclaw is the logical one, and she knows that people who stay up late can't easily get up and learn things in the morning (a lesson my roommates would do well to learn!). :D

Awww, unpredictable? You're too kind! :)


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Review #18, by HEG Île-de-France

25th March 2014:
Hello again! I really like all these second person chapters. It is a nice twist to your story which makes it so much better. The thing I'm really looking forwards to, is who's speaking. Maybe it Dumbledore? No I don't know. This is so mysterious. Good job!
HEG :)

Author's Response: Hello! It's been awhile, and now the deadline for your challenge is just around the corner! Where does the time go? :)

Thank you for liking the second person PoV that I'm writing in! I wanted to give something different a try, and I really enjoyed it. I did have a set narrator in mind, and Dumbledore is a good guess, but no, the narrator is someone a bit closer to the situation. :D

Thanks again!


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Review #19, by Aphoride Bretagne

17th March 2014:
Hey, stopping by from the BvB review battle! Found a spare moment during coursework research to pop here ;)

You know, I've seen quite a few Founders stories which say Salazar's parents were hurt by muggles, for fear of witchcraft, and all along that sort of line, but not many which explore his parents - well, his father, really - in this much depth and I really, really like it!

I love the way Salazar's father was a powerful wizard in his own right, and how it seems like young Salazar looked up to him so much and sort of idolised him to the point of wanting to be exactly like him. It's a really realistic thing, I think, for kids to want to be like their parents, but it's not something I see all that much in ff so I love that youv'e included it here! I loved the mentions of Salazar's father being cold and calculating and resentful of muggles, and how Salazar, in wanting to be like him, grew up to be that way too. Kind of reminds me a bit of Draco, you know, how he grew up like that, with the idolisation and then becoming like him (though not quite the same, haha, seeing as Draco redeems himself at the end). It's a really bittersweet thing!

I loved the whole idea of why he joined the school in the first place, as well, why he created it with the other founders. I've never seen a story before which suggested that he joined the others in order to create a school where he could effectively teach pureblood doctrine, but it's a great idea and really suits him, particularly the idea that he doesn't ever really say to the others.

Gah, I actually feel really sorry for him, you know? He wants to be his father, he's been raised to believe that he's special and muggles aren't, that they took everything from him and that he should get revenge for what they've done, and he's so ambitious! I wonder what he could have become if he hadn't been so fixated on revenge...

Anyway, this was a really, really lovely chapter - characterisation, writing, everything was really great! I really enjoyed reading it! :) :)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Hi!! Thank you so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to write me another lovely review!! (I'm sorry that it took me so long to respond!)

The entirety of this story turned out to be a little exploration of the four Founders' backgrounds, I think! I really wanted a good explanation for Salazar's hatred of Muggles, and him idolizing his father seemed to make a lot of sense. :)

Yep, my version of Salazar is exactly the opposite of the James Sirius Potters that float around the archives sometimes--he wants to be JUST LIKE his daddy. So much so that he becomes him in the end. Yes, I thought of Draco when I was writing this!! But unlike Draco, Salazar won't redeem himself (I've got it in my head that his dad dies early on. The "heroic" image that young Salazar sees can never be ruined!).

Oh, really? I thought that his motivation for joining the other Founders was that he wanted to teach purebloods, but... Now that I think about it, canon doesn't really go into motivation all that much. He's definitely a secretive one, and in my head he continues on with his pureblood agenda until the Chamber of Secrets is discovered and he and Godric fight it out.

I feel sorry for him too!! He has no idea that he's been brainwashed, and as he's grown up with that mentality, it would be way too difficult to change his mind. I think he might've been a far greater wizard than the one that he became. Sure, he did a lot of advanced magic, but what of it? He didn't have love, and in the end (as Dumbledore knows!), that's more important than power, anyways.

Thank you so, so much for your review!! :D


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Review #20, by Aphoride Normandie

13th March 2014:
Hey there! Dropping by from the BvB review battle! :)

So I always love reading Founders stories, and when I spotted this I jumped straight here! I love the way you've written it for the Instrumental challenge, too - classical music is some of my favourite to listen to at times, and it's so very appropriate to the time period!

I love the amount of detail you've packed in this. Honestly, it's incredible! I'm always so blown away by people who manage to write succinct, short chapters with so much in them, and it's exactly what you've done here. The little things about his friends and father being scared of him because of his magic, how he hunted and rode and had dogs and horses and the idea of chivalry - they all do so well in describing the era, you know? Making it come alive and breathe and completely definable. Like, if I didn't know what era this was set in, I could probably guess within a couple of hundred years :)

One thing - he wouldn't say electricity, since he has no idea what it is, haha. Maybe lightening instead? It's pretty much the same as electricity, or similar, at least, and he'd know what that was... ;)

That being said, I love Godric's character! I love the idea that although he was outgoing as a child, he almost learned to be brave and had to triumph over adversity to get there - that even though he had a good life to begin with, it fell apart and he had to find his own way. It's such a lovely, albeit bittersweet version of his life - most of the one's I've read have had him from a magical family or rich family, at any rate, and didn't speak much of adversity and things.

Sweet little mention of him having a son and falling asleep in his food :P

Also, I really loved the mention of how they formed Hogwarts - that it was Godric who called on the others to set it up, and Godric who argued for the feast to celebrate and things... again, it's a really unique take on how it all happened, and I really like it! :)

So yeah, I really enjoyed this - your writing is really, really great in this, and your characterisation is fabulous! I'll have to come back at some point to read the rest of it... :)

Aph xx

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for your review!

This was my second try at a Founders story, and I have to say that I really enjoy the time period! The song that I was given for the challenge was actually written in the twentieth century, but it fit so well with each of the Founders in my mind that I couldn't resist writing about them. :)

Awww, thank you so much! 500-word chapters are much harder to write than they should be, that's for sure! I had to delete several words at the end, but I tried to get every detail in without being long-winded and verbose (I'm actually really wordy most of the time, so this was quite a challenge!). I'm so glad that you could picture everything from my limited descriptions! :D

Oh, darn. I like to pretend that I could fit into the bygone times, but you know, I just can't live without my electricity! Pretty silly oversight on my part! I will fix it! Thank you for pointing it out. :)

In the story, I tried to give each Founder a unique backstory. I felt that Godric's bravery would be more valid if he had gone through some sort of ordeal that would make him want to set up a place for other magical people to be safe. In this case, his family is well-to-do, but his parents are really uneasy about his powers.

Thank you so very much for your fabulous review!


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Review #21, by patronus_charm Normandie

11th March 2014:
Hi there!

I really thought you did a great job here! You set up a really wonderful and unique story in just over 500 words (or is 500 and the extra was the an) which was a really impressive feat because we got such a full story of Godric and really got to know him which was really great. The choice of second person POV was a really good one here because I see it so rarely done, especially in the Founders era it provided a fresh light for this story. I think the section where it was most noticeable was the last line because it seemed to reinforce the courage of Godric Gryffindor, but then a vulnerable side too because it almost felt that perhaps Godric was saying that to himself to power him on through the tough times.

I thought the characterisation here was really great! As it was written in second person pov it meant that we were left guessing for longer as to exactly who it was which was a good thing because it meant we could form views on Godric which wouldn’t be as biased and it definitely was the case here. We had his rise and then his fall, but he still kept on going which I really admired him for because it was nice to see that this supposed heroic warrior wasn’t always mighty and on the winning side.

This was a really great start with a hint of mystery as to why exactly did his friends leave him and what was going to happen next, so I’ll see if I can catch some more of this! Good luck in the challenges! :)


Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for your review! I'm sorry it's taken over a month for me to respond.

Yes, I really wanted each chapter to be 500 words each, and the extra is just me rambling on about silly stuff. :) I'm so pleased that you think it's unique!!! I wanted each Founder to have a somewhat different background, and for Godric, I felt that a good theme was succeeding in the face of adversity.

This was my very first attempt at second person PoV, and I think I really like it! It was fun to play around with the perspective and the thoughts that Gryffindor was having. I actually had a specific narrator in mind--which comes in during the last chapter. Let's just say that the narrator of the story knows what's going on inside people's heads. :)

Thank you so, so much! I don't usually try to be mysterious with my descriptions, but this story was one in which I purposefully veiled the character's name until the end. As stereotypical as it is, I wanted to stay true to the concept of Gryffindor bravery, so having him face difficulties and overcome them was a test of his bravery.

Thanks again for your lovely review!


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Review #22, by toomanycurls Normandie

10th March 2014:
Hello! Doing a review for the RRT!

I really like the style in which this is written. I've never tried second person because it seems so daunting. You do a marvelous job with it, really! I love how the narrator orients the story around Godric's characteristics and upbrinigng. It's such an interesting angle.

The implication that Godric went to found as school as a result of some failing in life is quite interesting - he was so successful at the school. It's really deep actually, that people will rise out of failure and make something great of their life.

I wrote for this challenge too!! Mine is also a mutli-part story/song thing.

Great work!


Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for your review!!

I'm glad that you liked the style!! This was my first attempt at second person POV, so I was nervous about how it would turn out. It's awesome to hear that you liked it!! You definitely should try second person POV--it's a fun thing to explore!

I didn't know what I wanted Godric's backstory to be when I first started writing this, but the song that inspired this story just seemed like it was someone's march of triumph. I thought that if Godric had had a battle with adversity in his younger years, he would feel all the more triumphant at the first Welcoming Feast. So that's how it came about. :)

The Instrumental Song Challenge was so much fun. I hope that there's another one in the future! :D

Thanks again for your review!


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Review #23, by HEG Bretagne

6th March 2014:
Hello again!

This is HEG. Right so I really love how you've done the first two chapters. It's still a mystery who's speaking and I really want to know. I'm beginning to learn the theme of your story and I predict (I might not be right) but I predict that you will do some more chapters for the other two founders. That is a good idea. :)

I love your description and metaphors which are amazing. I am really wondering what will happen in the fifth chapter. This is so exciting!


Author's Response: Hello, HEG!! It's good to have another review from you!

Good prediction!! I think you'll find that you're right!

The fifth chapter is the most mysterious of them all (I think so, at least!). Thank you for loving my description and metaphors! I really appreciate it! :D


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Review #24, by HEG Normandie

3rd March 2014:
HI! This is HEG here for the challenge review :).

You've DEFINETLY made a good start on this story. You have used really interesting words and sentences. I love the way you don't know who they are talking about until the very last sentence. It creates a good sense of mystery which I like. It's good to have a bit of mystery in the story, I don't like it when you can predict everything that's going to hAppen.

Second of all, I love the way that you've written your story in the second person. I think the second person is particularly hard to write in so you've done well in that. I have only read a second person story once before and I think yours tops it.

This a very imaginative idea that you have thought of and I really like it. It's good because I don't know who's speaking. At first I thought that it was Slytherin but then it said Sazalar would eat them like monks on every single day of the year so I changed my mind. I did think that it could've been Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw but it didn't seem like the tone of voice that they'd speak in if you get what I mean?

Also I noticed that you've put stomachesches rather than stomachs.

I really love this story. Every single aspect of it! I hope you continue in the same way and I will be reviewing all the other chapters that you put up. I hope they 're great!

HEG :)

Author's Response: Hello! Thanks for being so prompt with your review!! :D

Awww, you're so nice!! I'll admit that I wasn't truly intending on being mysterious, but I guess that concealing the character's name until the last sentence does kind of add some mystery to it. :)

This is my first attempt at second person POV, so I'm glad to hear that you think I did pretty well with it!! Thanks so much!

Yep, it could only be Godric Gryffindor. The song that inspired this story was so brassy and bold that I immediately fixed on Gryffindor as the subject.

Whoops!! Quick editing got the best of me! I'll fix that. :)

Thanksthanksthanks!! :D


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Review #25, by 800 words of heaven Normandie

1st March 2014:
Hello! I'm here reviewing for the Gryffindor/Slytherin Blackout Battle!

This story basically has everything that I love reading in fanfics, but never actually read for some reason: the Founders, challenge entries, and 500 words. So obviously, all of this combined just makes for a fantastic story that I couldn't resist :)

I really love this! It was short, but to the point, and I loved how it was written in second person. Stories in second person are rare, but they're just so wonderful to read. I find it difficult to write in this person, so I'm so impressed by the wonderful job you've done!

At first, I thought this was a one-shot but then I actually went and read the story info page and your AN and I am so happy that there are going to be four more installments to come! Yayayayay! More Founders musings! So much to look forward to.

I hope to be back soon :)

Author's Response: Wow!! This review was unexpected, and that made it all the more enjoyable!!

Yes, I like short chapters, too. They grab the attention, but you can read them quickly when there isn't much time for reading fanfiction. :) I am so glad that it caught your attention!

This was my first foray into second person, so it's nice to know that you thought I did well with it! I never knew how I would do with writing from this PoV, but I think that I really enjoy it!!

Nope, this isn't a one-shot at all!! I have four more chapters posted now, which means that it's complete! :D I do hope that you come back to read more!!

Thank you very much for your lovely review!!


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