Reading Reviews for Just Walk Away
  
18 Reviews Found

Review #1, by emmacweasley Chapter One

18th June 2014:
Hi! This is a lovely start to this story. I like how it starts in the thick of things rather than giving explanation to how things built up. I think we learn more about characters when they are challenged, anyway. I also think that you've got characterization for Hermione and Ron spot on, here. At one point I was expecting Hermione to mumble something about "the emotional range of a teaspoon." :)

I did think that Rose was a little dramatic about everything, especially the letter, but I guess that's understandable.

I appreciate that Hermione's grown into a very careful mum, in the sense that she's gentle with how she brings up her children, even though she seems to be teaching them sturdy principles and bravery. I like that.

It was a great chapter! I can't wait to read the next.

Author's Response: Hi there!
Thank you for reading and I'm glad that you enjoyed it!


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Review #2, by MissesWeasley123 Chapter Three

29th May 2014:
Hey Linds, great chapter.

Gah, Draco's cruelty just gets worse, doesn't it? I was screaming "NO!" when Draco used the curse on her!!!

This chapter was so sad :( I felt so bad for Rose, poor Rose. I really loved how you showed Hermione's strong motherly care for her in this chapter, and their special bond was really cool. Ron was amazing as always, and showing him in a positive light and he's just so fatherly and stuff, super protective which I always imagine to be true so that's great.

Great chapter, results will be up soon!

Author's Response: Awesome! Thank you Nadia! I am so glad you liked it. :):)

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Review #3, by MissesWeasley123 Chapter Two

22nd May 2014:
Hey Lindsey! I'm getting on with these reviews so I can type up the winners!

I really liked how you continued the story in Scorpius' POV. Again, you can really see the similarities between him and Draco :) Oh, and I have to say, Astoria is quite fun as well. I loved the way you characterized her.

I can see loads of improvement in your writing,as you're really trying to show the character's feelings and emotions. Pretty cool!

Draco's outburst was definitely dramatic! I think it might have been a bit too dramatic, and it hurts to see that Draco hasn't changed. I really had hoped for him to not be like Lucius but I still think you carried that over really well.

The letter he wrote her was so emotional and I felt so bad for Scorpius! They don't deserve that at all. Especially when he was trying to explain to Astoria that she was just a trial run... it's so sad that they have to sneak around.

Anyways, another great installment. Good luck, and I'll be back for chapter 3 soon.

Author's Response: Nadia! Hi! :)
Yay I was excited to see that you reviewed.
I am glad you think my writing has got better and I am sorry that I made Draco mean. He will get better later in the story don't worry. :)
I am glad you liked Astoria and it sucks that they have to sneak around, I agree. . It's sad.. but hopefully it will be resolved soon enough. Well thanks so very much! :) I hope you really liked it! :D
-Lindsey


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Review #4, by balinaginaaa Chapter Three

12th March 2014:
Oh this is so different to what I'm used to reading, it's so different reading about Draco being like this! This is only the second rose/scorpius fic I've read and omg I love it already! I can't wait for the next chapter and the rest to come! Also I just finished your first fanfic and you've improved so much (not that it was bad to begin with)
I hope you finish this story, I'm so excited! :)

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks so much for reading! :D
I'm glad you like it! Please keep reading!


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Review #5, by HazelMidnight172 Chapter Three

12th March 2014:
Poor Rose and poor Scorpius! Draco is really nasty in this story, isn't he? I always hoped that he would redeem himself a bit after the war. I'm very interested to see how this story turns out!

Author's Response: Hey there:)
Thanks for reading and yes.. Draco is pretty nasty in this one so far. Read on;)


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Review #6, by Shelby Pagan Chapter Three

9th March 2014:
Your writing is outstanding! I absolutely love this idea and hope you can update soon!

Happy Writing!

Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you like it, and I hope I can update soon! :)

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Review #7, by anythingcouldhappen Chapter Two

24th February 2014:
Hi Lindsey! I'm here with your requested review!

I think it was a good choice to write this from Scorpius' point of view, so we got to see how much of what Rose feared was true, as well as Scorpius' thoughts on everything. It would be really hard to break up with a girl you loved, even if it was for her and your protection.

Draco's reaction was a bit intense. I think maybe something you could do in further chapters if you have the opportunity is maybe explore why after all these years, blood status is still so important to him. I love to see motivations behind characters :)

Hope this helped!

Sam

Author's Response: Hi Sam!
Thanks so much for your review!!! :D
I am glad you liked it!


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Review #8, by Midnight spark Chapter Three

19th February 2014:
I don't believe Scorpius is like this... Draco is so cruel!

Author's Response: Yes Draco can be cruel sometimes unfortunately. .. :( but hopefully it will get better. :) read on!:) thanks for reviewing!

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Review #9, by Midnight spark Chapter One

19th February 2014:
This story really captured my attention... LOVE the beginning!

Author's Response: Aww thank you. Glad you love it!:D

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Review #10, by Rae Ella Chapter Two

18th February 2014:
Loved his pov, keep up the great writing!

Author's Response: Thanks so much! Glad you liked it!!:D

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Review #11, by LightLeviosa5443 Chapter One

17th February 2014:
Hi! Here for Review Swap!

I think you have a really interesting start to the story here! I'm definitely curious to see where you intend to go with the story. I think it's great that you chose Scorose (they're my favorite).

How dramatic Rose was, was fantastic, I think it was great because teeangers are REALLY dramatic and that made it so believable. This story is definitely different from the general scorose I normally read, boy meets girl, girl hates boy, girl falls in love with boy (I'm guilty for writing one of those). So this was a nice little change.

Great job on your creativity and how you jumped right into the story. Wow. I saw a couple of misplaced commas and extra spaces, but nothing majorly worth mentioning!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Hi!
Thanks so much for such a sweet review!
I am glad you enjoyed the story so far :D
I am glad you like my uniqueness in the story as well. Rose isn't as fiery as she is in usual fics with her and Scorpius. I'll have to read your's sometime, I bet it is good! :D
Thanks again!! :D
-Linds


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Review #12, by SkyEcho Chapter One

17th February 2014:
Hi Lindsey!

What a great start! I like how we're thrown right in to the heartbreak. It instantly has me rooting for Rose and Scorpius - and their forbidden love. You've done a good job of slowly introducing some details to give some context to their relationship. Dating for a year seems like a very long time when you're young - and you did an excellent job of showing just how much Rose is wrapped up in her love for him. It's definitely realistic that she'd feel pretty confident stating that he is the one for her.
I liked how you captured the mother-daughter relationship between Hermione and Rose. And I found your characterizations of Hermione and Ron to be spot on! My favourite scene was where they're discussing Rose. Your line, "Hermione's face turned bright red and she then hit Ron with a book, hard" made me laugh :)
I really enjoyed reading this and I look forward to finding out what happens next!

Author's Response: Hey there:)
Thanks so much for coming by and reviewing and I am glad you liked it! I am very glad I am doing well with characterization :D I struggled with that in the past :)
Thanks so much for a sweet review!


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Review #13, by anythingcouldhappen Chapter One

16th February 2014:
Hi there! I'm here with your requested review!

I liked the way you kind of just jumped right into the conflict. Right away you draw the reader in with wondering about Scorpius and also how Rose and Scorpius' relationship developed up to this point.

I do think however you might need to include more flashbacks or something, to show the reader how Scorpius and Rose got together and developed such an intense love. The one flashback you did have was nice, but Scorpius asking her out suddenly like that out of the blue doesn't lead automatically to her writing that note to him. In the first chapter it doesn't bother me, but just make sure you connect the dots in the next few chapters!

The other thing I noticed was that your writing seemed a bit stilted. There were a few sentences that were kind of jarring in the way you constructed them. Maybe you could get a Beta reader?

Overall, this was a nice start, and I think you have an interesting story on your hands :)

Hope this helped!

Sam

Author's Response: Hi Sam,
Thanks very much and I would like a beta reader but no one has replied yet :)
I am glad you like it despite some of the gaps between why they got together and ect. ;)
-Linds


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Review #14, by malfoyfan1 Chapter Two

16th February 2014:
Poor Rose, ur right he didn't need to do that!

Author's Response: No he didn't... thanks for reading!!!

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Review #15, by blackballet Chapter One

16th February 2014:
Hey there! Sorry it's taken me a bit to respond to our review swap!

I really like this chapter. I also like Scorose just because it's kind of like Dramione which will always be my first love. I think that you might have rushed it a bit, however. Smaller details like the fact that she wore the promise ring didn't need to be there. I felt like a lot went on and in a very short amount of time. It almost felt like a one-shot! You should definitely be careful about that when writing.

I think one of my favorite parts was when Hermione said "..his bark is worse than his bite.." It was true to how I always imagined her as a mother, so well done on the characterization.

I think that this could turn out to be very interesting as your talent as an author progresses.

Keep writing!

blackballet xx

Author's Response: Hi blackballet!
Thanks so much for a lovely review. You're right, it may have been rushed a bit but also I was thinking about how some HS aged kids would react in a six month relationship. Maybe I am wrong but the story won't be all lovey dovey from here, promise:) I hope you enjoyed it.
-Lindsey


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Review #16, by Maelody Chapter One

12th February 2014:
I really like the counting seconds bit. It have a quick roundabout right at the beginning at just how much she longed to be with her boyfriend!

So, I was going to review HfaH or your other one, but I saw this one and couldn't help myself from reading it (though I'll still be reading/reviewing the others once I get back to reading).

So I like that she wants to run away with Scorpius. It shows that she's young, and in love. A lot of love stories with teens in it turn to an unrealistic side because one of the teens always seem to have some huge, level-headed, understanding in love, and you lose sense in just how young they really are. In face, I can't wait to see Scorpius' reply. That is, if his father doesn't see the letter first and reply or leave her hanging.

In some ways, I really hope that Draco has grown up and is like Ron in some ways. Not angry at his son, but disappointed. While disappointment is awful, at least we know Draco isn't beating him. I just hope that's the case. But I feel like it won't be.

Another bit I really liked was that Rose sneered at Hermione and wanted her to leave. Don't we all go through that phase? Where our parents can't even help us and even what they have to say can't help? That was perfect, and yet another great example of just how young she is.

All in all, I think you have the makings of yet another great story and I can't wait to read on with what you make of it!

~Mae

Author's Response: Why hello again, :)
Thanks soo much for reading and I'm glad you liked it! I did try to portray how she was young.. because that's probably how I would feel at sixteen again if I thought I loved someone and I was afraid. :)
I hope you read on and I thank u so much for reading and reviewing this!!!:D


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Review #17, by MissesWeasley123 Chapter One

12th February 2014:
YES.
You have no clue how excited I am for being able to say, "Here with my review for your challenge entry!" It's my first one, so this is pretty exciting.

And wow Lindsey, great job! This is so different from what you've written before, and I can sense your talent with Dramione angst with Scorpius and Rose here.

I really liked the way you used the quote. You might want to go back and add a citation to it though, because it's Khaled Hosseini's words :) It's page 17 of A Thousand Splendid Suns. I loved it though, and it was exciting when that sentence came up! And especially at the end, when you altered it and Scorpius' name came.. and that was really cute.

I think you got the whole aura of unforbidden love excellently. I could feel the angst, and Rose's emotions were depicted really nicely. You did a good job with her, but a little more depth wouldn't hurt. Not necessarily depth -- but hopefully in the next chapters we get to know more of her. What kind of a person she is, and stuff.

You captured her fright really well too :)

I think another thing I enjoyed was Ron and Hermione. Ron's characterization was perfect, to be honest. You wrote him amazingly. I loved when Hermione tried to make him laugh. I think in that moment their relationship seemed really beautiful.

Anyway, thanks for a great story! Give me a shout when more chapters are posted, yeah? Then I can review them ;) Unfortunately, May's a long way's away.. but I really liked this a lot. Keep up the great way!

Author's Response: Hi there!
Yes May is a long way away but I am happy that you already read and reviewed my first chapter. And yes there are others. :)
I am glad you liked my characterization and how I portrayed Ron and Hermione's relationship well :D
Please read on! I will let you know when a new chapter updates! This story will alternate between his and her point of view at times but it will mostly be Rose's POV. Thanks again and look forward to hearing from you!! :D
-Lindsey


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Review #18, by Court Chapter One

12th February 2014:
This is an interesting and sad beginning. I hope that Scorpius is okay. I'm thinking from the summary that he'll be sent away to a different school. Can't wait for more.

Author's Response: Thank you! I am glad you liked it! Please keep reading:D

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