Reading Reviews for Guilt
  
16 Reviews Found

Review #1, by UnluckyStar57 Guilt

16th April 2014:
My goodness, you're a poetic soul!!

There's something about your writing, you know? It just sings. I always enjoy reading your work because you absolutely know how to craft a sentence and weave it into the tapestry of the story that you're writing.

There are too many sentences that I could quote to tell you how musical and eerie they were, but I made myself choose only a small paragraph: "The house itself is a relic of the underworld. Grisly trophies are tucked away in the deepest recesses. The rich tapestries hide festering skeletons between the thick wooden panels." Malfoy Manor is so much a part of the Malfoy persona, and I think that you hit the nail on the head with this sentence. The imagery throughout the story--especially when Scorpius sees/imagines blood--is shrouded in death and funeral language. It's the sort of thing that I love to read, but it's going to give me nightmares tonight.

That Bible verse... Mmmmphhh!! More chills. The Malfoys are very Old Testament, and that verse just applies SO perfectly to this story. Very very chilling.

I really feel bad for poor little Scorpius and I wonder if he'll always see the ghosts. Perhaps when he grows up, his children will see them in his place. Whatever the situation, I hate it for him. :/ And I actually broke out into goose pimples when Lucius appeared. That's some terrifying stuff!

Keep on being brilliant and creepy and poetic!

~UnluckyStar57

For the Huffleclaw-Ravenpuff Eggstravaganza.

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Oh, you're so sweet! Thank you! I'm so pleased you liked this. Wow, thank you for all the lovely compliments. ♥

I really loved writing this and sort of getting in a poetic-inspired place to write it, so I'm really pleased that came through to you. Thank you - I'm glad you liked the portrayal of Malfoy manor and how it embodies the family. Don't worry haha, I'm with you about the nightmares - I can only read Poe during the day when I'm not home alone. :P

Yes! I found the Bible verse and the idea of generational sin and just thought it fit perfectly with the story. I'm so pleased you liked it.

Aw, I know! Poor Scorpius. My status on his character changes from day to day and story to story, but one theory I had for this story was that he would have no choice but to turn out as corrupt as the rest of the Malfoys, so the guilt kind of turns into true guilt for himself. But that's just one interpretation, I really wanted the best for him as well.

Thanks so much for the amazing review, it was a really wonderful surprise! :)


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Review #2, by 800 words of heaven Guilt

8th April 2014:
SLYTHERIN REVIEW TAG!

It has been ages since I've read something of yours, and since I visited last it feels as if the number of stories available for my immense enjoyment has doubled. Has it really been that long?

Anyway, don't take this the wrong way, but you're a fantastic writer of creepy things. First Sylvia Plath, now Edgar Allen Poe. The creepiness is strong. I love it.

I've only ever read The Raven by Poe, and only because I wanted to understand one of the answers posed to the riddle about what's in common between a raven and a writing desk. I did however read a series where Poe was a character and sufficiently creepy. And there was that one episode of Sabrina the Teenage Witch where her aunts invite Poe for dinner on Halloween because they want to get real spooked. And then there was that super creepy episode of Warehouse 13... Thus, in my obviously vast knowledge of all things Poe, I declare this story a stunning success in creepiness! All rambling aside (who am I kidding, I can't put rambling aside), I felt that this piece really captured the spirit of Poe's writing. Your use of ghosts, such a mainstay of horror and all things creepy, was absolutely fantastic, and the theme tied in beautifully with the quote from the Bible at the beginning. Very ominous quote, that one!

I also loved that this piece explores the ramifications of Draco's actions. I'm being a complete English student (I'm not an English student anymore) and claiming that because the curtains are blue, the character is depressed, rather the curtains just being blue, but I really felt that this piece explored the depth to which the War affected the Malfoy family. I mean, they've been doing shady things for generations - it's written there write in their name, but it's so interesting to see all the crimes catch up with them, and manifest in the Manor as (totally creepy) ghosts. It's just even sadder (and creepier) that Scorpius, who is basically like the only innocent Malfoy at this point in time must bear the burden. It makes you stop and think twice about your actions. Who might I be burdening with guilt they don't deserve? Deep stuff, yo.

Also, I absolutely love word limit challenges! They're ridiculously hard to write, but you've done amazing (as always). Please excuse my greater-than-usual amount of rambling in this review! It was lovely to read :)

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Ahh, it probably has! :P I have a bit of a... story addiction. I blame the challenges for giving plunnies!

Thank you! That makes me so happy since I love writing these creepy stories. It's true though, somehow two of the creepiest writers have come through in these stories.

Haha, your explanations of your experience with Poe are really making me laugh right now. :P Has he ever been featured in a Doctor Who episode?? Poe is incredibly creepy, and I can only read/think about his work when it's not dark, or else I give myself scary thoughts. Clearly Scorpius could relate to this. :P I'm really glad you thought it did a good job of capturing Poe! I do love him (though not at night) and wanted to do his work justice. The quote from the bible and the idea of inherited guilt just fit so well with the Poe poem, so this piece came together weirdly smoothly.

I like your analysis here, and that's just what I was thinking. The most tragic part of the story is that Scorpius as an innocent young boy is the one who is punished, whether externally or from within his own head, and has a very traumatic life because of this. Haha, this whole burdening future generations and generational sin is (apparently) this big biblical debate, but it did sort of make me take a step back and wonder about karma and what sorts of people my ancestors were.

Me too! I was honestly amazed, because usually I just sit and write and bam, there's a zillion words and run-on sentences. But with this story, it felt complete, and I was thrilled to realize I'd only written 1000. Although it did take some trimming of course, but still. Exciting!

Thanks so much for the amazing review - and no worries, love rambling reviews and rambled quite a bit myself in this response. :)


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Review #3, by HEG Guilt

30th March 2014:
Hello!

My goodness LuLuLuna, you have a way with weariness! It was like a horror story and I really loved it. From the starting line I guessed that it would be based on a song or a poem and I don't usually like those but you somehow made me like this one! I wonder what Scorpius did to make him so guilty. Ooh, this is so mysterious, you've got me hooked. I wish there was another chapter which explained what he did. That would be interesting. The ghost woman reminds me of something. I don't know what but it makes you feel like someone's creeping up on you. Also, the descriptions make it feel so REAL! It's so scary! Good job, very well written,
HEG

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Thank you! I'm glad you liked the horror aspects, and what a creepy story it is. It's based on the plot of a Poe poem, though I think the actual plot turned out quite differently.

My concept on the guilt here was that Scorpius didn't do anything, but felt the guilt of his ancestors bearing down upon him - so it's kind of like inherited guilt, which is really unfair in a way. He is a Malfoy, and so he's being punished for being a Malfoy, even if he is technically innocent, or at least that's what I was hoping to get across. :)

I like your reaction to the ghost woman and how it felt scary! Thank you for the lovely review! :)


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Review #4, by Rumpelstiltskin Guilt

26th March 2014:
Coming to read the amazing story, because Nadia said so! (And sorry for the brief delay, I was distracted by pancakes.)

I think you've definitely captured some of the emotion that was given by Poe's "the Haunted Palace", and you've managed to maintain some poetic justice to the story :D. It's lovely (and rhymes, which is even more fun).

This story is amazingly dark and creepy! I love how the past is alluded to, being too late for the Malfoy's, and poor Scorpious is tormented by the "ghosts of the house" or perhaps the ghosts of the past.

Understandably, he wants to burn the mansion down. How else would he exorcise the home from its demons?

Nadia was right, though I expected she was -- this was amazing!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hi Rumpel! :)

Aw, thank you for taking the time to leave me a second review - you really didn't have to, but it was really lovely!

I'm glad you thought it brought through some of the emotion - I first thought the poem would be really hard to write about but then got inspiration for Malfoy Manor, and the rest of the symbolism sort of followed. Hehe, the rhymes were some of my favourite. I felt like the story was more inspired by the poem than actually following its plot or style - Poe is a lot more sublime and subtle than this poem is, but I really liked the idea of it.

Yes, here the ghosts of the house and past are sort of the same thing. And I felt that his anger at the end was justifiable, but also liked how it showed his own faults and rage even as a young boy, so I'm glad you noticed that part.

Thanks so much for the lovely review! :)


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Review #5, by MissesWeasley123 Guilt

26th March 2014:
...
I am honestly speechless because this piece is wonderful and haunting and so mind blowingly i'm running out of adjectives BUT the level of writing is so HIGH I just cannot express my amazement.

I never even realized that those parts in italics were rhyming with the next sentence -- I thought the first couple of times were totally me being weird and reading them that way, but it was intentional and it was so smart of you, and you are SO intelligent Jenna, honestly. Your creativity blows me away.

Scorpius is so different you know. His story was thrilling, and absolutely haunting (literally, lol) and you were so original with it. I really loved it. There was this dark side to the over done next gen and Hogwarts cliches.. but wow, this was different and so brilliant. There was something else I loved, the part with Narcissa... how he feared she would become a ghost one day. And her broken heart :( We see so many descriptions of "broken hearts" but yours was so different, and I have goosebumps!

(the curly haired ghost was Bellatrix, wasn't it?)
-le gasp-

They creep in the dark and strut proud as peacocks through the light. Need a loan? Malfoy will double the interest. Masters and masters and beautiful wives. -- I read this and was just utterly BAFFLED because HOW DOES ONE EVEN WRITE LIKE THAT? You spun this new twist AND IT WORKED and it was REAL and I am so freaked out right now, and omg favouriting story and author haha :P

Superb writing ♥
(why does the scale not go to a million!?!?!)

Author's Response: Hi Nadia! :)

I am speechless about the loveliness of this review! ♥ Wow, thank you so much! I'm so happy you liked this and the writing in it, I really enjoyed it and it's really great to receive such positive feedback.

Haha! The rhyming was a little sneaky but I love how you were confused by it at first. The first two lines, which are also in the summary, sort of got stuck in my head so when I started writing this I tried to keep their rhythm.

It's great to hear you thought Scorpius seemed original. Here, he's just a scared, naive little boy who feels guilty and responsible for his ancestors' sins, yet he also is very bitter and almost violent about it by the end. I know, poor Narcissa! :( She's a really vulnerable character in my mind, especially here.

It definitely was her. :P That hair just can't be replicated.

Oh you are too kind to me! :) I'm so excited that you were excited about this and this is the kind of reivew I'm going to keep re-reading for a long time. ♥ This is the kind of writing which I really find so fulfilling to work on and getting your feedback on it is absolutely amazing! Thank you so much! :D


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Review #6, by 1917farmgirl Guilt

20th March 2014:
Wow, girl! It has been too long since I read anything of yours! I forgot the beauty and magic with which you put words together!

This was powerful stuff!

I admit - I'm NOT a Poe fan because dark, creepy stuff does just that - gives me the creeps! And this certainly did raise the hairs on the back of my neck as I read, so apparently you did your job well.

I LOVED the rhyming couplets that divided the story up! They said so much with so few words and really set the tone for the story.

Poor, poor Scorpius! What a heavy weight for a little boy to be carrying! And this was just so spectacularly creepy!

I really can't get enough of your ability to paint images with the words you write. I could picture this entire fic with morbid detail, and almost had to stop reading and get up and turn some more lights on. I felt like there were bony fingers reaching after me as I read. Bravo for a wonderful bit of story telling!

The last line was my favorite. It was so blunt and direct and really slammed home the point of how much Scorpius wants to escape from the wrongs of his family, and what he thinks is the only way to do it.

I promise to come back and finish some of your other stories after these battles are over with!

Jealous of your writing talent, as usual!

- Farmgirl

Blackout Battle round 3 review 19/20.

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Aw, you are too sweet! :) I'm so glad you liked this! Hehe, I know what you mean about Poe - I can only read him when I'm not home alone and all the lights are on. But I love writing creepy things and I'm so pleased you liked it.

Thank you! The rhyming couplets, though they weren't really Poe-ish, helped me get into the mindset for the story.

I know. :( It's so unfair for Scorpius, to suffer for his family's sins. I really like him as a character so felt a little sorry for doing this to him.

Wow, thank you! :) I'm so glad the story felt vivid and visual, and like there were bony fingers... that's so creepy but really perfect for a reader's reaction, so I'm very happy to hear it.

Ah, the last line. I'm pleased you liked its bluntness, and how it shows Scorpius exhibiting some of the violence he is witnessing on the ghosts himself. He wants to escape, but not even destroying the house will accomplish that.

Thank you so much for the wonderful review! :D


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Review #7, by maraudertimes Guilt

15th March 2014:
Hello!

Well what do you know. I honestly don't know how to put how awesome, terrifying, sad, crazy, amazing, etc. this story is. Other than how I just put it of course.

Scorpius is one of my favourite Next Gen characters because there is so much to do with him in terms of redemption or mirroring his family's past, so to see a little nine year old Scorpius *burdened* by his family's past is honestly so sad and heartbreaking. The fact that the ghosts' guilt is thrust upon him seems unfair, although for a nine year old to see them in the first place is actually unfair.

I loved the little mentions of canon characters, such as his mother bringing happiness to the house, considering it wasn't hers to start with, and his grandfather, Lucius, who I assume was the ghost at his bed the night before his grandmother was crying, so I'm also going to assume he had died that night in Azkaban. If my guessing is correct, along with the previous thing, I cannot believe how utterly magnificently strategic you wrote that, because the little hints gave so much and made this story so much more.

At the end, it was so sad, but very true, how Scorpius would want to burn down the house. It reminds me slightly of mental illness, where the person who is ill will do anything to stop the voices, although in this case I guess the ghosts. It's just truly frightening that such a thing would happen to a nine year old.

I must say, I've never read Edgar Allen Poe, but I've heard of his works and I think you utterly nailed the challenge. It's creepy and horrifying, but amazing and I utterly love it.

Great job! This was amazing!
Lo:)

Gryffindor vs Slytherin Blackout Battle Round 3 Review 20/20

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Ah, thank you so much! :D This review was so wonderful and made me really happy.

I agree about Scorpius! He's quite interesting in that he has this dark past, and has a decision to make about whether he's going to follow in his ancestors' footsteps or be a better guy. I agree, it's completely unfair, and all the more sad for it in my opinion. :( I felt really horrible for doing this to him.

I'm glad you liked the canon mentions! :) I love Astoria as I've written her in other stories so even though this is a different head-canon, I wanted to make her a positive figure. Your assumption about Lucius is correct! :) I'm glad you liked how it was more hinted at than explicitly stated - as Scorpius was quite confused and seeing everything in flashes and blurs it felt right to let the reader fill in the blanks and clues.

I imagined this in terms of mental illness as well, or from how I've seen it portrayed in Poe and others. Another equally violent option might have been for Scorpius to wish to go blind so he wouldn't have to see the ghosts, but that was a little dark even for this. :P

I'm so pleased you liked this! :) And found it creepy... that's just what I was hoping for, and it was so much fun to write in that way.

Thank you so much for the lovely review! :D I really appreciate it!


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Review #8, by nott theodore Guilt

14th March 2014:
Wow... Jenna, I have no idea how you manage to write so many stories that are all so amazing, but this one has given me chills. It was just so... creepy. Really, you captured the essence of the Edgar Allen Poe poem brilliantly, and at times parts of the story read almost like a poem themselves. The quote from the Bible was really well placed, too; I could tell from the outset that it was going to be scary and Scorpius was going to be punished for what had happened in the past.

I felt so sorry for Scorpius in this piece. The way you described the ghosts is so haunting, and I can imagine that would be enough to completely traumatise a boy that's so young for the rest of his life. They seemed almost greedy, and I loved the description that you put into them, especially since he didn't seem to know exactly who they were, whereas we could recognise people like Bellatrix. Not knowing them would make them all the more terrifying.

Ugh, I really hope that the family move out of that house soon, or Scorpius is not going to have any chance. I just thought this was so fantastic, and I loved reading it and all the detail you included. Especially in 1000 words too - knowing how long your chapters often are, that's a real achievement! :P

Sian :)

Blackout Bingo review 13/20

Author's Response: Hello again! :)

Hehe, I'm glad you found it so creepy! It's been quite fun hearing people's responses to this story and what they think of it. I'm glad you thought it did a good job of emanating Poe and that it read like a poem at some parts - I wanted it to fall into a certain rhythm which was disrupted and broken up frequently. I'm pleased you liked the quote from the bible as well - I googled "generational guilt" and apparently it's a debated reading of the Bible, so that theme really fit perfectly into the story.

So do I. :( The poor boy, he really didn't deserve to be punished. It would be terrifying, even more so because they're quite gruesome and they are his family. Greedy! Yes, that's just how I saw them. I'm pleased you liked how we could recognize them but Scorpius couldn't necessarily.

I know! I felt that Scorpius probably wouldn't tell his parents about the ghosts, or they wouldn't believe him. In a way, they are sort of a figment of his mind, but also all too real. Haha, you know my writing too well! :P I was so proud of myself for having such a short story!

Thank you for the wonderful review, it was such a joy to read! :D


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Review #9, by ShadowRose Guilt

7th March 2014:
Hello, I'm here for Blackout Bingo!

I'm blown away. Yes, once again, I'm completely blown away by your writing skills. This is just so beautiful and eloquent, and you've captured the essence of the Edgar Allan Poe poem that inspired this so well - it definitely matches in the creepy atmosphere.

Poor Scorpius, constantly followed by these Malfoy spirits throughout the manor. It's really a great physical manifestation of the fact that he's stuck carrying around a name with so many negative connotations despite having nothing to do with it. I have no idea if that metaphor was intentional or not, but regardless, I really thought it played into the story well, the way you played off an innocent character being (literally) haunted by the past.

Oh wow, I love the detail you've thrown in about Lucius and Narcissa. It's definitely believable that Lucius would spend his life in Azkaban for what he did, and I'm glad you've exposed that here, having him show up at Scorpius's bed, and then reveal the freshness of his death right afterward. And Narcissa's torn up about it too - "Scorpius worries she might soon join the ghosts" is such a haunting line.

I started trying to pick out some of my favorite quotes, but there are just so many amazing lines you've created. The story is so rich with description and imagery and different pieces of figurative language, and it's just a joy to read. The last line - "Mostly, he dreams of burning the house to the ground, the spirits of the mansion glowing and screaming in eternal purgatory." - ends on such a chilling note, with a nine-year-old wanting to burn down a house. It really brings the story to its haunting end and just sounds so melodic-ly phrased.

Chills. I have actual chills from reading this. It was the perfect balance between haunting and powerful, and as usual, I loved reading your work!

-ShadowRose (Taylor)

Author's Response: Hi Taylor! :)

Aw, wow, thank you! I'm so glad you liked this, and felt it emanated Poe well. He's so creepy and lyrical, and it was so much fun writing something inspired by his work.

I know, it's really not fair for Scorpius. :( Yes, exactly, he's the innocent one suffering for his ancestors' crimes, and you caught the metaphor perfectly. I thought that as Poe's work is never quite distinguished as being real or in the character's head, a similar idea would work for Scorpius' guilt.

I quite dislike Lucius (or love to hate him :P) so it felt only fair that he would get locked up once and for all. I'm glad you liked Narcissa's reaction as well, and how Lucius came to haunt Scorpius as well. I imagine him as being both a good grandfather yet inherently creepy.

Thank you! :) I'm glad you liked the writing here. I really enjoyed working on it. That felt like the right way to end the story, with Scorpius becoming violent and angry and destructive.

Thank you so much for this amazing review! :D It was a real joy to receive, I really appreciate all your feedback. :)


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Review #10, by Akussa Guilt

6th March 2014:
Hi, I'm here for the review battle / bingo / just so I can give back at you for the amazing reviews you've left me!

I got a chill reading this. A chill that lasted from beginning to end. It was simply beautiful.

I'm familiar with the translated version of the poem so I know the theme and idea of it but the rythm and wording is lost on me. You've made me realise that I need to read the original version because the amazing story you created from this is mindblowing.

Poor Scorpius is definitely oppressed with the weight of his family history and that must be horrible to live with. Bearer of a name he didn't ask for, at the receiving end of feelings he definitly didn't wish for.

What touched me the most through my read was the part about Narcissa. The way you described her is simply gutwrenching. She is the physical depiction of guilt.

All and all, it was just wonderful. Moving and psychologically challenging. It really got me thinking about the impacts of one's family history, the impacts of guilt. The impacts of indifference. Wonderful work and congrats on writting a 1000 words flush story!!

Author's Response: Hi Akussa! :)

I'm so pleased you liked this, and that it gave you a chill! That's how I felt writing it, and so it is very lovely to hear this feedback.

Thank you! :) I'm not sure how much I emulated the rhythm of the poem, though there was definitely a rhythm going through my head as I wrote this. I'm glad you thought it did a good job of representing Poe's work!

I agree, poor Scorpius. :( It's quite unfair, but he's reaping the repercussions of all his horrible ancestors.

I'm glad you liked Narcissa's appearance as well! Yes, she is one of those characters who is both a bystander yet guilty. It was interesting finding a way to include her and Scorpius' perception of her.

Ah, I'm so happy to hear you found it challenging to read, and thinking about history and guilt. I really loved writing this, so your wonderful review is very appreciated. Thank you so much! :)


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Review #11, by megthechef43 Guilt

1st March 2014:
LuLuluna,

wow, you right so dark and twisty stuff so far that I've read. That's okay, I prefer to read some stuff with depth. Not everything is sunshine and rainbows. I think you did an amazing job embodying the dark nature of Edgar Allan Poe, from what I've read of his work. Though, I haven't read the work that this story, your story is based on. I really like the premise that the Malfoys would be haunted. They do have a dark family history and it only makes sense that these past wrong doings would come down on the future generations. I hope when he gets old enough and he takes over the manor that he will burn it to the ground and get rid of the ghosts that haunt him.I feel sorry for a little Scorpius, it would be very terrifying for the young child to be haunted by so many ghost.it was a specially creepy when Lucius visited him as a ghost and asked to tell him a story. one thing I was wondering throughout the story though, why is narcissa blind? it was interesting to read about what happened to her after Lucius went Away. This was a really great story and I really enjoyed reading it. I'm definitely going to be reading more of your work.

Until next time...

Meg

Author's Response: Hi Meg! :)

Thank you! Dark and twisty stuff is quite fun to write. I'm glad you found it had depth.

I'm glad you thought this did Poe justice, I love his work even if I can never read it when I'm home alone. :P I agree, poor Scorpius, but his family was quite horrible and it's not fair that was taken out on him. Aw, I'm glad you're hoping for a better life for him! So was I.

Narcissa was just blind because she was getting older, and, in a weird symbolic way, it fit because that way she wouldn't see the ghosts that Scorpius could, whether she deserved to or not. :) I'm glad you liked reading about her!

I'm so glad you liked this, thank you for this brilliant review! :) I really loved hearing your thoughts on the story.


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Review #12, by Faith100z Guilt

27th February 2014:
Oh. My. Goodness.

This was seriously one of the best one-shots I've ever read.

I had shivers the whole time I was reading, it was so perfectly creepy. The lines you wrote to rhyme with the lines from the poem were brilliant, it made their impact even stronger.

All the little references made it even better, particularly the bit about the stars. It really tied in the Black family history and traditions and how he has the weight of more than one family's history on his shoulders.

I loved the line, "For the Malfoys, it is too late." I've read so many Next Gen stories where their war crimes are kind of just ignored or glossed over, or Scorpius doesn't know/talk about them, so I'm glad you went the opposite way with this. It felt like they were really a marked family and that they were past the point of redemption, even with Astoria and Scorpius' good intentions.

I could ramble about this forever, but I'll stop now before I get even less coherent. This was beyond brilliant, super well done!

- Faith :)

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Wow, thank you so much! I'm really honoured you liked it.

The rhyming lines were some of the first things I came up with, and I framed the story around them, so I'm really glad you liked them. Creepy is so fun to write!

Yes! Poor Scorpius, he really doesn't stand much of a chance. I'm glad you liked the stars comments as well.

I completely agree - the Malfoys, especially Lucius, willingly did some terrible things and it feels right that Scorpius would have some sort of reaction to that. I like your interpretation of it here, and how even the innocent family members are past the point of redemption, at least in this story.

Thank you for the amazing review! :) It really made my day and was so thoughtful and lovely. :D


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Review #13, by Kinnu Guilt

20th February 2014:
Hey,

I haven't read Poe before but your interpretation of his poem just made me Google him! So much meaning or is it just your awesome writing?

I think the clear progression of thoughts in your story makes it unique.

Scorpius is clearly worrying his 9-year-old head with things he shouldn't be worrying about at that age. And the thoughts you write he had were certainly pertaining to his age... Liked that!

'Need a loan? Malfoy will double the interest.' Loved this sentence! Shows off the Malfoys, it does...

I like that Lucius Malfoy came to Scorpius. The brushing of the hand and the way he was introduced... It was Lucius, wasn't it?

The descriptions in the story were apt and I could picturise all of it clearly in my head. Good job and leave me a few tips on it, will you? Pretty please?

This was certainly creepy and I think it was meant to be so. You've certainly accomplished what you meant to do!

And you certainly haven't skirted arund the bush. The subtle references hit me too, even where you didn't mention names and ... woah!

I'm so going to read your other stories...

Kinnu

Author's Response: Hi Kinnu! :)

Ah I'm glad this encouraged you to google him! :) He's so creepy, but amazing. I had a lot of fun with this story and turning the poem into a story in the Potterverse.

I'm really happy you liked it. Yes, poor Scorpius, he bears a lot of the guilt from his ancestors and it's quite unfair for him. I'm glad it felt that he sounded like a nine-year old as well.

It was Lucius! :) I'm glad you could tell - that part was one of my favourite bits in the story.

Ah, I'm so glad to hear the descriptions felt real! :D I have no idea how it happened - Poe inspired me! :)

Writing creepy stories is so much fun. I'm so glad you liked it and all the little references!

Thank you for a beautiful review! :D


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Review #14, by Red_headed_juliet Guilt

17th February 2014:
Very well put together and creepy! (That's a good thing, as your poem was creepy.) I like how you made mention of the seraphs and angels as well, as those were mentioned in The Haunted Palace as well.

Poor Scorpius. I feel bad for him and Narcissa. Though it was a very clever thing, adding in the ghost of Lucius asking if he wanted a bedtime story.

I think my favorite line was

"The rich tapestries hide festering skeletons between the thick wooden panels."

Very nice. Over all, very well indeed. Thank you so much for participating in the challenge, I can't wait for the deadline!

Author's Response: Hi! :)

I'm glad you found it creepy, it's hard to write a Poe-inspired story and not get creepy. :P I had a lot of fun working with the poem, since it's quite short and has a simpler plot it was a lot of fun adding to it and fitting it into the Potterverse.

I'm glad you feel bad for Scorpius, so did I! It's not fair that the innocent have to suffer for their ancestors' crimes, not at all. I'm glad you liked Lucius' appearance as well, I liked writing his scene especially.

I liked that line as well - thank you!

I had a lot of fun writing this, so thank you for the brilliant challenge. I'm looking forward to reading the other entries as well. Thanks so much for the lovely review!


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Review #15, by Unwritten Curse Guilt

17th February 2014:
Ah, I was so tempted to read your Speed Dating entry but I promised myself that those would be my reward for finishing my paper (which I'm currently procrastinating...). So I chose this one instead and I am SO glad I did.

Wow.

This piece is stunning. Haunting and stunning.

I literally shivered at the image of the house when Scorpius was looking back at it, with spirits moving in the windows and their hair caught up in the curtains. Uh. *shivers again* Such a powerful image. And the whole bit about the grandmother... Excuse me while I go hide under the covers.

I know that this was fashioned after Poe's poem--and his works are usually quite literal--but I like the idea that these spirits don't really exist (perhaps I'm reading too much into it). Perhaps they are a manifestation of the guilt and the legacy of cruelty and bloodshed that is linked to the Malfoy name. Scorpius can't escape it no matter how hard he tries (I made this connection when you included that beautiful line about him being just another star in the constellation, as well as the puppet imagery throughout). So sad. So breathtaking.

I don't know what else to say! This truly did read like a poem, but you also morphed it into a new sort of genre.

I just... yes. I love this piece. It's eerie, but to the perfect extent. You never go over the top. It just is. I think I could squee about this piece for hours but I shall leave you in peace. ;) I'm so glad we did this review swap!

-- Gina

Author's Response: Hi Gina! :)

Ahh good luck on your paper! :D I'm glad you picked this one as well, I was really excited to get feedback on it. This review is amazing!

I'm so excited that you liked it as I had no idea what sort of reception this story might have as it was so weird. :P

I'm glad you lied that image! I definitely creeped myself out a bit writing this so I'm glad it had the same effect on readers. :)

You're right, the spirits can be read as being either real or imagined. That's just what I had in mind, the two layers of the ghosts being frightening as they haunt Scorpius and the even scarier idea of the generational guilt and how Scorpius receives his ancestor's guilt. I'm glad that line made the connection, and that you found it sad.

I love what you said here about a new kind of genre - that's just such cool and insightful feedback to get. Thank you!

I'm really glad to hear you felt it didn't go over the top, that was something I was a little worried about. Haha, poor Scorpius never gets left in peace, anyway. :P Thanks so much for the brilliant review, I loved it! ♥


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Review #16, by quixotic Guilt

13th February 2014:
Here from the review swap! Sorry for the delay, I was traveling with no wi-fi :P

This is the sort of story that I'm going to relive in my dreams later tonight. I love Edgar Allan Poe but surprisingly, I haven't read this poem. I just went to check it out and I can totally see the connection between the poem and your story.

To be honest, I quite like the idea of there being a curse on the Malfoys. They were bad people during the war and any amount of sympathy for Draco does not erase his actions. A lot of stories sort of forget this fact when they 'remake' Draco into a good person. It's nice to see that you've brought up consequences for the Malfoys. It isn't very easy to forget the past and turn into a new leaf. The past isn't something to be laugh at, it's a ghost or a shadow that is always nearby. Wow, that sounded very depressing.

I like how Scorpius was the only one who could see the ghosts despite the fact that he didn't do anything wrong. As in the case of wars and the Chernobyl and Hiroshima, the innocent people are always the ones who get hurt. This is the price that the Malfoys paid for all their evil deeds. It's terribly sad for Scorpius, but rather fitting for the rest of the family.

The writing is amazing. Yours and Poe's. It feels like you've captured that element of description into your story. Making a story from a poem isn't all about taking the plot and modifying it to fit your context, it's about really analyzing what style the poet uses. In the Haunted Palace, Poe uses a lot of imagery especially to describe the nobles. It's nice that you've done the same as it shows how you really delved into the depths of the poem and did as much as you could to recreate it.

There are so many lines in this story which I love, way too many to paste here. Suffice it is to say that I loved every line that was in italics and several others. There is one line that I really loved: Scorpius is but the latest star in the family constellation, burning very brightly, burning everything it touches.

I think this sort of summarized his entire personality in one sentence. It shows his heritage- a family of stars, it shows how his innocence burns bright in the dark, transforming the very ghosts that taunt him into angels. It's so beautiful, that I'm actually close to tears at this point. I am so glad that I got the opportunity to read -and rant about- this story because it's one of the best I've read in a long time. Really amazing job!

Author's Response: Hi! :) No worries at all! :D

I'm so happy you picked this story to read and that you liked it, I really loved getting your amazing feedback on it. I'm glad you could see the connection: the poem itself doesn't have much of a plot but I had fun incorporating the symbols and creepy ideas of Poe into the story.

I'm glad you liked the curse! I agree, from what we can tell they were just horrible people for generations. I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Lucius in which I love hating him and take a lot of joy from locking him up in azkaban. I'm happy to hear you liked the consequences, and how the past does quite literally haunt the descendants. It is sad how Scorpius is the one who is punished for his ancestors' sins.

I agree, the punishment and guilt of the innocent is always the saddest. I sort of got the idea of generational guilt from reading about post-WWII Germany and how the next generation were displaying guilt for their parents' actions, and then googled it and found out it's something contested in the Bible, so everything fit together quite nicely. It's terribly sad for Scorpius, and I do like him as a character here so I felt very sorry for doing this to him.

Aw, thanks so much! :) That's really nice to hear. I'm glad you liked the style here and that it embodied the poem. In hindsight I think I could have cut down on the gruesomeness since Poe is a little more subtle and sublime with his horror - he's good at those moments of sudden shock and disgust :P - but ah well, there's always next time. :) I'm so thrilled you liked it however.

Ah, I'm glad you liked a lot of the lines in italics and the line about the family constellation. It fit quite well since the Blacks were all named after stars, and I love how you've analyzed this. Thank you so much for this truly beautiful review - it means so much and I actually have kept coming back to re-read this since it's so amazing. You are awesome! :D



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