1 Reviews Found

Review #1, by TheGirlOnFire Chapter One: Accidents, Bacon and Chaos in the Kitchen.

14th March 2014:
hello, this is for the blackout bingo:)

I chose to read this because I have a particular soft spot for Oliver Wood. This was cute and alight hearted tale of their anniversary. There are some issues with this chapter though. The speech is very confusing as it's very bunched up. I'm not sure if this is a formatting error or not, but to make it less confusing I'd advise you spread the speech out. Also Oliver dropping the F-bomb right at the end doesn't seem like something someone would do after spending their anniversary with someone they loved. Apart from the small bits of criticism I enjoyed reading this story and it was very enjoyable.

TheGirlOnFirexx

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