Reading Reviews for Mary's Lamb
  
1 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Pixileanin The end of the nursery rhyme

2nd February 2014:
Hi there! I saw that this story had no reviews, and had a very interesting premise, so I'm here to read what you've got.

First off, congratulations for writing your first fanfiction! Your opening is very unique. I like the contrasts you played with, by pulling a seemingly innocent fairy tale into a dark story that includes Tom Riddle. You clearly have a great imagination.

I really like the descriptions you used to set the scene here. There was just enough to let me "see" it, but not too much that it bogged down the story. I didn't mind the shortness of the introduction. It gave us a taste of the upcoming adventure that you have in mind.

I do have a suggestion for you: a lot of times, it's easier to read on the screen when people put double returns on their paragraph breaks, so the eyes have a little space to move around. I know it helps me when reading. You might try it and see if you like how it looks. :)

So far, it's a good start, and I hope you have more chapters coming.

Happy Writing!

Pix

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