Reading Reviews for Mixed Feelings
  
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by peppersweet Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

3rd January 2014:
Hiya, here for day 8 of the 12 days of reviewing challenge! This was such a nice wee one-shot. I loved the casual absurdity of the Weasley's Christmas, like Roxanne accidentally throwing forks at Lucy, Albus levitating Lily and Hermione flawlessly performing the Heimlich manoeuvre on Ron. Bet he's glad he married her, eh?

I loved how much of a grudge Roxanne had on Henry Allen, seemingly for nothing. I know I get like that sometimes - I have terrifyingly short patience, especially when hungry - and I thought you portrayed Roxanne's frustration with him really well. Of course she fancies him! The ending was hilarious, when she just kinda throws insults at him then snogs him. I feel sorry for the poor boy. This line, I thought, summed up her inexplicable hatred of him perfectly: When all the dishes were clean, he wiped down all the counters and managed to remove the red food coloring stain that had remained for several years now. Roxanne thought about what it would look like if he suddenly went up in flames.

Roxanne's insistence on referring to Henry Allen by his full name at all times made me laugh - it reminded me of the podcast Welcome to Night Vale, where one character is always referred to as John Peters (you know, the farmer?)

Good job. Best of luck with the duel! ♥

Author's Response: Thank you! I also have short patience and have been known to get snappy when I get upset at people not going fast enough for me. :P I've heard of Welcome to Night Vale, and I keep meaning to listen to it but never do. Have fun in the 12 Days of Reviewing! :)

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Review #2, by BookDinosaur Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

2nd January 2014:
Hello! I'm here for the Seventh of the Twelve Days of Reviewing! :)

I really reading enjoyed this little oneshot! I absolutely loved how you told us about the Weasley family at Christmas, it seemed so in canon and exactly like them and I really liked hearing about all the trouble and mischief the Weasley/Potter clan got up to when they're all cooped up in a house together, hahaha!

I particularly loved when they were all in the kitchen washing up, it must have been so chaotic for everybody!

And moving onto the main chcracter of the piece! I really loved your characterisation of Roxanne, she's certainly a fiesty one! She's crazy and really jealous as well and I think that you did a great job characterising her in such a short time and little words. I think Roxanne is overlooked a lot and Im so glad that you decided to write this about her.

I really enjoyed how she kept calling Henry by his full name throughout the piece, it was really funny and a nice touch.

And the final kiss scene! There was a lot of buildup to it and I love how Rozanne was ranting at him and he couldn't get a word in edgewise, imagine how confused he would be after the kiss! And the mistletoe was a nice touch as well. :)

All in all, I think that you did a really good job on this oneshot and I'm really glad I had the chance to read it. Well done for getting an entry into the Duel, and good luck!

Author's Response: Thank you! The whole entire piece was a bit of a parody of typical love/hate relationships seen in Next Gen. One of the people actually has a decent personality most of the time, but the other person of the relationship just overreacts. I definitely exaggerated that in this one-shot, but it was still so much fun to write. Thank you for reading and reviewing! And have fun in Twelve Days of Reviewing! :)

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Review #3, by DracoFerret11 Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

29th December 2013:
Hello there! This is DarkRose from the forums! I decided to read and review all of the Writer's Duel entries! :D So, let's go over things:

Plot: This was an interesting story! It was a bit difficult for me to get a real feel for any of the characters since it was so short, but I liked the premise. If you had a chance to expand this later, it would be nice to know more about the background of Henry Allen, Roxanne, and the other characters. It would also be nice to get more "into" the story (see "Descriptions" below).

Characterization: I think you wrote Roxanne well, but I wasn't too sure why she was so hostile towards Henry Allen when I can't really see what he's done to her. He seems like a nice guy...

Descriptions: It would be nice to have more details about how things look, sound, smell, feel, etc. It would help readers to get into the story and really feel like they're experiencing the events.

Emotions: I understand that Roxanne is angry at Henry Allen for "invading" her Weasley family Christmas, but I wasn't really sure WHY she was so angry. Haven't any of her cousins brought friends/girlfriends/boyfriends to the holiday before? It just seemed like a bit of an overreaction without too much background.

Interactions: The ending scene was a little odd. I was convinced she really didn't like him, but she kissed him anyway? Hmm.

Overall, I think this is a good basis for a story, but I would like more explanation of how things got to this point so that I could understand the events better. Other than that, good job and good luck in the Duel!

--Emily

Author's Response: Wow, thank you for the review! If I ever consider doing over the story after the Duel, I'll take your critiques in consideration. I whipped this up fairly quickly, so it's not as developed as I would like. I've always been terrible at describing people and places since I assume everyone already knows what they look like- I know, it's a bad habit. :P Thank your for the lovely review!

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Review #4, by teh tarik Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

28th December 2013:
Hey there! I'm here for Day 2 of the 12 Days of Reviewing challenge over at the forums! :) Also, congrats for getting in an entry to the Winter Writers' Duel!

I love reading about Roxanne; she's one of the Next Gen kids who isn't written as much as James II or Albus or Lily or Rose, which is really a shame because there's so much potential for her character, her being the daughter of George and Angelina.

And I really enjoyed reading your portrayal of her; she's a little crazy, very feisty, insanely jealous type, ranty...definitely a bit of a basket case. And I love her. I really enjoyed the amount of build-up to that final kiss scene; it did take me a little by surprise, though I guess now it makes sense, seeing as how Henry Allen managed to stir up such strong emotional reactions from her.

I like how baffled he is when she's ranting at him, and I'm giggling a little thinking about how much more bewildered he will be after he's been snogged hard by her. And of course, I love how she exits the scene - so dramatic, and so fitting for her characterisation!

I think you've done a great job with the prompt as well, and you've definitely created a really great sense of the atmosphere of a Weasley Christmas. I love all the chaos of the kitchen!

This was a really fun and light-hearted story to read! Well done, and best of luck with the Duel. I'm sure you'll do well. :D

-teh

(12 Days of Reviewing - Day 2)

Author's Response: Thank you for the review! It's greatly appreciated, as well as the comments on the characterization of the characters. Writing the Weasleys is always fun, but I'm afraid I'll make them flat characters that are just red-headed and loud. :P Thank you again, teh!

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Review #5, by momotwins Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

25th December 2013:
I love a Next Gen Christmas story. They make me happy :) Roxanne is good here, I like how you wrote her. I like how annoyed she is with Henry Allen for being perfect and how she always uses his full name. And I totally agree with Teddy that birds are evil and therefore edible, that made me laugh.

Obviously, it was apparent throughout they had something going between them, but it was still satisfying to see her rant at him and then kiss him ;) Good setup and good emotional payout there. Very cute story, great job! Merry Christmas!

Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm happy you noticed Roxanne using Henry's full name the whole time. It was one of those small things I put in at the last moment and thought nobody would care about. :P Have a merry Christmas too!

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Review #6, by Wildmoon Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

21st December 2013:
I love this! I love how you've got conflict in it, but still keep it light and happy for Christmas.

I think you captured the ever-changing moods of teenagers really well, as well as the frantic goings-on that a Weasley Christmas is bound to entail. I just want to know who secretly magiked that mistletoe there. :-)

Well done!

Author's Response: Thank you! And no, I don't think anybody magicked the mistletoe, it was just there and Roxanne and Henry didn't notice it until later. :)

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Review #7, by UnluckyStar57 Flying Forks and Bathroom Talk

17th December 2013:
Whoa! The ending was a doozy! :D

Sorry, that was my immediate reaction and I had to write it. Really, I did NOT see that coming!

I clicked on this story because it was for the Writer's Duel, and I was like, "Yeah, mistletoe, blahblah," but the mistletoe was missing!...Until the end, that is!

Roxanne's hatred of Henry Allen seems to stem from only this particular instance, but did she know him at Hogwarts? What year are they in at the time that this story takes place? I really think that I'd like to see them in a story one day... Please? :)

I thought it was absolutely fabulous how you characterized the Weasley kids with the little exclamations in the kitchen. The best part was that I didn't even need to know who was speaking--it was all part of the mass chaos that accompanies that brood wherever they go. :)

And Henry Allen, caught in the middle of it all, is so funny and perfect--Roxanne just HATES that, I see. It's almost like when you have a friend over and they suck up to your parents... Gross. :D

The mistletoe part at the end was BRILLIANT. I really didn't expect Roxanne to be the one to kiss Henry, simply because she hates him so much and she was ranting at him only moments before the kiss. He didn't even have time to get a word in edgewise!

This was a super creative and awesome story! I must say, I fully expect to see Roxanne and Henry in another story one day--at least, I hope that you write something like that. It would make me very happy if you did. :)

~UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! This was so much fun to write, and it's deviant from my typical sarcastic and/or sad writing. I was in the Christmas mood and it just kind of happened.

I loved writing Roxanne, but I'm not sure if I'll write her in more stories like I did here. If I did, I'm pretty sure it'd just be another Christmas story next year or something. Her characterization was actually a bit different than how I normally write her, along with her age and order in the cousins. She's usually one of the youngest, while here she's somewhere near the top. And to answer your question about Henry's age, he's seventeen like Roxanne, as I imagined Roxanne and James in the same year, and since Henry is James' friend, he's a seventh year like the two of them.

I'm glad you enjoyed the story, and thank your for leaving such a long and wonderful review! :)


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