Reading Reviews for Trapped
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by UnluckyStar57 How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

7th January 2014:
Hi! I'm here for the Twelfth Day of the Twelve Days of Reviewing!

This first chapter really intrigues me. Lily Potter obviously doesn't care for fame, but I never thought that Ginny would be the type to force her daughter into doing something that she doesn't want to do. Why does she make Lily go to Diagon Alley? Does she not know that Lily doesn't enjoy herself? Do James and Albus also have to give interviews and pose for cameras? Do they enjoy that sort of thing?

I look forward to learning more about the quiet Lily Potter and exactly why she has to do the things that she doesn't want to do. I think this is a great beginning, and a very original idea! It isn't often that I see a Lily Potter (II) who isn't obsessed with fame or things that are pink. ;)

~UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm glad this intrigued you! I wasn't exactly aiming for that, but eh, details. Lily definitely dislikes the fame that being a Potter brings her, and Ginny is just really mean in here. :( I don't know why I made her mean. She just waltzed in as a mean person. Lily hides her unhappiness relatively well, and I think James and Albus manage the whole fame thing better than she does.

This is actually a oneshot, but no that you've mentioned it, I'm thinking about expanding this. Hmm. Anyway, I'm glad you like Lily and how I wrote her here!

Thanks so much for this thought-provoking review, hehe. :P No really, I loved it. Thanks again!


 Report Review

Review #2, by LightLeviosa5443 How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

1st January 2014:
So I read this with the intention of the Review Battle but someone beat me to it :(

I just loved this so much I couldn't help but leave a review. This story is amazing. I absolutely positively loved how you described Lily's wish to just be quiet and hidden and silent. I love how you use the term Fake Lily when she's being anything but herself. I think it shows how she truly feels better than any other wording could have.

I love plunny's that turn into wonderful one-shots like this one! I really did enjoy reading this story. I even read back through with the idea of throwing in some CC so my review wouldn't be all this is wondiferous, but I couldn't find a thing!

So.. Wondiferous job, I'll certainly be checking out much more of your stories!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Hahaha, well I'm so happy you left a review anyway!

Aw *blushes* You flatter me, I'm not that good. But I'm glad you loved it! Yeah, I figured that everybody would be following her around, but she doesn't want the attention, she doesn't want any of it, but she has to put up with it. I'm glad you liked the significance of Fake Lily. :)

Haha, thank you! I'm so gald you enjoyed reading this, and that you couldn't think of any CC is an amazing compliment!

Thank you so much for this lovely review, I hope you like my other stories as much as you enjoyed this one! :D


 Report Review

Review #3, by academica How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

1st January 2014:
Hello friend! Here for the Review Battle :)

This story was really refreshing because it felt realistic and portrayed a moment in Lily's life that I don't see written all that often: having to deal with being a celebrity's offspring. I liked how I couldn't quite tell what she was in for until it actually happened; her age was sort of mysterious at first, so I thought maybe she was going to catch the train to school, and then when you mentioned Witch Weekly I wondered if she was auditioning to be a model or something. But I like the idea that she has to report on her life on her birthday to satisfy the curiosity of America. I wonder how many other young stars are forced to do something similar rather than actually enjoying the fact that they're famous.

I also liked the normalcy of Lily's life at home, with her stealing a bit of chocolate and not wanting to keep her room and belongings in perfect order. The idea of escaping into music is one that hits close to home for any teenager, I'd think, or at least I could relate to it a lot when I thought about that time in my life.

I noticed a few typos, such as missing commas, but nothing that obscured the quality of the story at all. Overall, I really enjoyed it.

Nice work :)

-Amanda

Author's Response: Hello Amanda!

Ah thank you! Ever since I was really young, I've always been quite a private person, and the idea of being a celebrity, having everybody interested in you and your life and knowing everything was just repulsive, so those thoughts evolved into this oneshot. Hahaha, I didn't mean to be mysterious but I'm glad it happened then! I'm happy you liked the idea, but I wanted to play up the invasion of privacy thing here and I'm glad it made you think.

Yeah, at home she can be more herself, so to speak, but I think that there's always a part of her being supressed. That's right, I wanted to make her normal as well, to show how unhappy anybody would be in her situation, and I'm glad you could relate to her!

Ah thank you, I shouold go back and edit this once the queue reopens, but I'm happy they didn't spoil the story and that you enjoyed it!

Thank you for this lovely review, Amanda!


 Report Review

Review #4, by MissesWeasley123 How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

25th December 2013:
Hi, merry Christmas!

LILY! I love her tons. I have a weird relationship with her when I write pieces on her, though of course I prefer to kill her in everything I write haha. But I've read her in so many versions too. Attention seeking Lily, depressed Lily, annoying Lily, clingy Lily, but never have I read bitter Lily. Your idea was so original, and I honestly loved it.

The concept is one to applaud. You write so well and are immensely talented. The way you play with words is so great. I'd quote all of this if I could.

I despised Ginny. She got under my skin and I hated her for being so snobby and treating Lily that way. As a reader, I hated her 10 per cent of the way i hate Umbridge. You did a really good job of characterizing her so I felt that way. One of the greatest things a writer can do is make someone feel and you did just that.

Lily ♥ She is so... Bitter. And I understand that. Because you gave so much emotion into her that even she was alive. You made me sympathize with her. She was just so different. I loved the use of a display in a jar... That was an excellent visual.

Really well written! I highly enjoyed it. You write wonderfully. Great work and happy holidays!

Author's Response: Merry Christmas to you too, Nadia! :D

Hahaha, I'm glad you already liked her, and I'm so happy that you found this unique and that you liked it!

Ah thank you so much. ♥ I'm so flattered you think I write well.

In my headcanon, the pressures of fame just got to Ginny, and she started pressuring her only daughter to manage it like she did. I'm so happy I made you feel though, and I'm glad you thought my characterisation of her was good. 10% of the way you hate Umbridge is a huge compliment, haha! If it doesn't sounds too sadistic, I'm glad I made you hate her a little because she does act horribly here.

Ah I was worried that Lily would be so bitter she was unrealistic, but to hear you say that she was alive and you understood her... It's wonderful to hear. The jar metaphor came when I saw the lovely banner I'm using in the UFG section of TDA, and I'm glad you think it was effective.

Thank you so much for this lovely review, Nadia! I'm glad you enjoy it and that you think I write well. ♥ Have a merry Christmas!


 Report Review

Review #5, by patronus_charm How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

24th December 2013:
Merry Christmas Emily!!!

I really liked this one shot! It definitely took on a different approach to the usual fame loving Lily that I tend to see and that was really great. I liked this more bitter version of her as its a lot more fitting given the background.

The squabbles between the siblings were great and reminded me of my dear brother and sister :P You showed the tension between parent and child really well too and in a light I haven't really seen explored before.

I suppose I can sort of understand Ginny's viewpoint as she had a poor childhood and would therefore want to better hersel and her own daughter because of that but what she did was just cruel. I felt so bad for Lily as you could slowly see her world collapse around her and morph into what her parents wanted for her.

I thought you wrote the central theme of her being trapped in something she didn't want really well and it was great to see it keep on appearing throughout.

Wonderful one shot Emily and I hope you have a great Christmas!

-Kiana

Author's Response: Merry Christmas Kiana! :D

Thank you! I was hoping to show Lily the way I see her, because in most of the stories i've read she's either fame-loving, like you said, or just scatterbrained. I'm glad you liked my take on her!

Hahaha, I used my own brother and sister for the sibling interactions. :P Ah I'm happy I showed that well too, because happily I get along very well with my own parents. :)

Yeah, you're right and I also wanted to show how the pressures of being famous got to everyone, even Ginny, which is quite sad really. I'm so happy you empathised with Lily and could see how she was slowly changing even though she didn't want to.

Ah thank you, I thought that being trapped was a suitable theme for a famous person and I hoped that I pulled that off. :)

Thank you so much for this lovely review Kiana, it made my Chrastmas morning. :D Merry Christmas to you too!


 Report Review

Review #6, by Secret Santa! How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

8th December 2013:
Hello! I wonder if you've seen my name?? Well, if u haven't its your fellow Ravenclaw Secret Santa!! Hi! This is a part of my first gift to u...I hope u got that it's reviews :) I'm sorry! If u wanted graphics, I really can't do those... But, if beta services are needed, please do let me know :) Just a reply to this review will be fine :D

Okay... on to the review! :) The first thing that hit me was that u used the word 'Lily' a bit too much. A few pronouns would help smoothen the flow :)

One more CC is that including some of the questions that the interviewers asked, and of course, Fake Lily's answers would make the story a bit more interesting :D I love that idea by the way, 'Fake Lily' amazing! And maybe some more of real Lily's thoughts, could also be included. :)

So, there's my first review!!! If u want anything else, please do let me know :) Other than that, expect more reviews :) And let me know if u want beta reading!! :D But, only one shots or short stories, please :) I'm already on two different projects :)

Your writing is awesome! The description! Ah! Amazing! :D

Have an amazing day! Or night! :D

- Secret Santa :)

Author's Response: Hello Santa! :D I haven't seen your name, hi, and thank you so much for this review, it made my day! I honestly don't mind that you're not making graphics, this is definitely enough. :)

Ah, thank you. I'll be sure to go back and edit that. :)

That's interesting, I never thought of showing the whole interview. (Well, I didn, but I thought it would be too boring for the readers.) But if you're interested, then I can certainly try and flesh it out a bit more. :) And thank you, I wasn't sure about Fake Lily at first but she grew on me. ;)

Thank you so much for this lovely review Santa. At the moment I'm not needing anything else really, thanks. A one-shot would be nice, but I'm not fussy at all.

Thank you! I'm so glad you think so. :D

I will! Have a nice Christmas, Santa!


 Report Review

Review #7, by MadiMalfoy How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

24th November 2013:
HI, I'm here with one of three reviews for your TMR prizes!

Firstly, LILY!! Gahh, I love when it's an obscure character story! This is definitely a different side of her too! Absolutely fantastic. (Sorry if there's a lot of DW references in this review, I'm kind of still on a high from the 50th!)

So, she's not very happy with her life. She has this whole persona that she hides behind when she's not at home where she can be herself. But even then she can't be herself, not until she's alone. It breaks my heart to see that! But you wrote it so beautifully that it seems so very real and I'm sure girls in real life have felt the same way too.

Overall, I loved that you didn't drag it out too long and kept the plot moving. What gave it a "wow" factor in my opinion is that there wasn't actually a whole lot of "plot" itself. I'm glad you didn't make it completely heartbreaking and sad by having her end her life because that wouldn't fit exactly anyway.

Moving on, I really liked this one-shot (obviously) and can't wait to read more of your stuff! Will get to your other two reviews ASAP! :)
~MadiMalfoy x

Author's Response: Hi Madi!

Hahaha, me too! Minor characters are just so interesting to read and write about to me. :D And no worries, the 50th is a big occasion.

You pretty much nailed it there, that's exactly what I was going for in the story. I'm so glad you felt for her. And I'm so happy that you think I wrote it beautifully! O_o

Yeah, I felt that this story should be more character-driven, if you know what I mean? So not a whole lot of plot. I'm glad you think that worked! And I agree, if I had her end her life it wouldn't have fit. Lily's a strong girl, she'll make it through. :)

Yay! Thank you so much. Take your time, I don't mind. :D
Emily


 Report Review

Review #8, by marauderfan How Could I Tell Them I Hate This?

9th November 2013:
EMILY

YAY NEW STORY! You know, you said this took a while to write, but it certainly doesn't come across that way to me at all. I think it flowed very well.

This was a great angsty story! You did very well portraying Lily's emotions throughout, and I felt so badly for her! :( I mean, I've never been famous for being the daughter of the man who defeated Voldemort so I can't say for sure, but Lily's resentment towards the media and even to an extent the entire wizarding world seemed understandable. She wants to be just an average girl, and she's forced to be someone she's not, for the press, and she doesn't like who she becomes so she hides in her Muggle music. I could detect some family resentment as well, how she sort of feels her mum is pushing her into it. Thus the spiteful chocolate chips and messy hair haha - I really enjoyed that little scene. Lily trying to be herself despite all the fakeness and the disguise she has to put on.

You really captured the unpleasant side of fame in this, and its effect on one person and on a family. It makes me wonder how Albus and James are dealing with fame too. They seem fine to an outside observer, and to Lily, but who's to say they're not just acting as well, like Lily is... I could definitely detect some sympathy in the way Al was addressing Lily in the beginning. Well, interesting to think about. ;)

This was well written and thought provoking - great work!! ♥

Author's Response: KRISTIN. I am an awful person for not getting to this sooner. My only excuse is NaNo, music exams, and RL in general. Yeah. Anyway.

Thank you! I'm happy I know that someone is excited when I post a new story. :P And I'm so glad you think it flowed well, that was quite honestly my main worry.

Ah you flatter me! I actually felt bad for Lily too, and so I went off and ate chocolate chips, hence her eating chocolate chips. Chocolate is yummy. I was afraid that Lily would come off as too angsty and sorry for herself, so I'm glad you could relate to her in a way. She just wants to be normal, but she never can be because of her family. Lily is trying to be herself, but it gets harder and harder as she forces herself to be more and more fake. I'm quite worried for her really, which is quite pathetic since I wrote her. :P

I'm glad you thought so, I've never been famous so I didn't know whether I got it comepletely wrong or not, I'm glad you think it's okay. ;) In my headcanon, Al and James don't like it, but they can deal with it, whereas I get the feeling Lily will snap sooner or later.

Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it. *hugs* Thanks for reviewing!


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login