Reading Reviews for Broken Foundations
  
17 Reviews Found

Review #1, by icingonmycake Deadly silent

9th May 2014:
Yaaay! Finally a new chapter! Loved this one so so so much!I loved all the emotions just coursing through this chapter. I absolutely love this story and thanks for the mention! Ch15 of Explosion is up by the why!
IoMC

Author's Response: Thanks sooo. Uch for the review. And I'm so sorry I didn't update for so long... It's been kind of a hard time for me and exams are in a few weeks, but i knew I couldn't just leave you hanging. Thanks for all the 'compliments' on the chapter, I have the next one half written and it will hopefully be up in less that a couple of weeks...

Thanks

perdaha. I will make sure to mention you again ;) Reviewer number one deserves her prize right?

Love..


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Review #2, by icingonmycake Disconnected

23rd February 2014:
Heey! I'm sorry I couldn't review sooner, but my finals are starting, in fact Spanish is this Friday. This was a very awesome chapter but you always leave your chapters hanging! So mean! Please update fast I can't wait to read more of this great story! (♥_♥) how can you resist this face?
Anyway, this was a very well written chapter though it needs some grammar editing, but whatever. Loving it! Peace out
IoMC

Author's Response: That's cool and don't worry I'm trying to write the chapters as fast as I can. But the cliff hangers are there on purpose(mwahahahah) sorry.:( anyway. Thanks for the review. I'm mentioning you in the next chapter! And you get a virtual cupcake!!! Well, good luck on you spanish finals.
Love
Perdaha obsessed.


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Review #3, by Random Disconnected

20th February 2014:
please please please please please please pleasr please please please write more!

Author's Response: Don't worry I will. and thanks for reviewing. You deserve a prize. Thank you so much.

Love Perdha_Obssesed


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Review #4, by Dark Whisper returning fire

23rd December 2013:
Perdaha,

Hello, again. Awe, poor Draco and his nightmares as well. I'm half glad that those beeps brought him out of it.

I liked your idea of him knowing what she was dreaming. It is very sad detail... and you know me. I love sad things that make me feel sorry for the characters.

It was good of Harry and Ginny to use their instinct when they thought of Hermione and her needs. It shows how much they care and how worried they are about her well-being.

And poor Hermione thinking that she had no value during the war... that is really sad and so untrue.

And Ron, well.. I'm not a fan of his right now. Poor Hermione.

As for your author's note at the end... that depends. My advice to you is that you should continue the story for yourself, not for reviews. Finishing will give you a sense of accomplishment and closure. I think you could probably finish in a couple more chapters. Just having them see hope and healing in each other could be the end of this story. You can end it on the possibility and hope for the future. That is only if you want to end it soon.

Of course this is YOUR story and you have your ideas. I just want to encourage you to write if it makes you happy to do so. I think you have a viable start to a lovely story.

Best Wishes Always. And Merry Christmas to you.
:)

Dark Whisper

Author's Response: Dark Whisper,

Thank you soo much you your advice, while on holidays I figured out a continuing story plot so I guess it won´t end son, thanks you for saying the review thing, Now I see it´s true.

I really I would feel better knowing my characters are aprecieated, but hey it´s also true that it gives you self satisfaction in finishing the story.

thanks for all your help and advise.

Perdaha


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Review #5, by Dark Whisper A maze of thoughts

23rd December 2013:
Perdaha,

Oh, I do love this line... "I was going to spend my life fixing pain." It is a really good look into his thoughts on that fateful day. It was is if he suddenly knew exactly what he wanted to do in life. It was a pivotal, all-important moment. I really like that idea.

And, can I say that I love the metaphors... her broken eyes... like looking into an abandoned house. Excellent imagery and description. Love it.

You also described Ginny's feelings of guilt really well. I find it a very true-to-life feeling. It is understandable that when someone harms themselves... that their friends and family feel guilty for not 'seeing it' earlier, before it was too late.

Ooh... and I love the 'flame-shaped' ruby. Wow, that sounds unique and beautiful.

And we have poor Hermione having nightmares. I do love the idea of Draco helping her.

Good job...
Dark Whisper

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Review #6, by Dark Whisper Painkillers

23rd December 2013:
Perdaha Obsessed,

Well, hello there and congratulations on starting your first story. It is a very brave thing and not easy to figure everything out on your own... (creating it, figuring out how to create an account, and post it, etc...). Good job.

Poor Hermione. It is a shame that she didn't get help all that time. I can see how Ron leaving would send her over the edge, the poor dear.

And Malfoy as a healer? I read an earlier review and I have to say, don't worry about that at all. I too actually have a story (more like ideas written down, not written or posted at all yet) where Draco is a healer. He is highly intelligent and many doctors are quite arrogant, so I think it fits him just fine. :)

For help with structure, you may find the BETA section of the HPFF Forum helpful. Betas are helpers that enjoy assisting with editing a story so that it flows properly. A good rule to remember is that if someone new is speaking, then you must start a new paragraph. And if it is the same person continuing to speak, then you do not need a new paragraph, just continue. Hope that makes sense, as I'm not good at explaining things like that. :P

Anyway, I hope your vacation with family is going well. I believe you mentioned it in one of your reviews on my stories. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! Reading on...

Dark Whisper

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Review #7, by Iellwen returning fire

10th December 2013:
Don't give up and update!
I want to know what happens next!

Author's Response: will do .thanks for the review

Perdaha


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Review #8, by Iellwen A maze of thoughts

9th December 2013:
Some information is a bit redundant (e.g: I came out of the room & after leaving the room).

Ginny & Harry happily getting engaged just after they left Hermione in Draco's care really made me want to slap them. I had to read to paragraph twice to make sure she wasn't remembering him proposing to her. But no.
Such rude, heartless f-words.

The story/plot are actually both interesting but it's kind of difficult to read in such blocks (watch out for the "yeah, blahblah" effect).

I'm looking forward for updates though so keep writing ;-)

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Review #9, by icingonmycake returning fire

2nd December 2013:
WOW! this is the best chapter yet. dont you DARE quit this story, you cant leave me hanging like this! That's just mean! Oh, and chapt 7 of explosion is up and 8th in the queue.
IoMC

Author's Response: thank you so much for your review. you made the next chapter possible. And sorry for not responding earlier. Just know. you're th resason there's a chapter four. I'll make sure to mention you in the next chapter. keep alert and watching for more. By the way. I'm loving explosion. It's amazing.

Perdaha_Obssesed


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Review #10, by loonyforever A maze of thoughts

21st November 2013:
Woah so cool! I loved it so much... but if Ron really truly loved Hermione he wouldn't have left her in the first place... and I feel really bad for her.

Malfoy as a healer seems contradictory, I imagined him to be doing the opposite of helping people, but people change, although I'm not sure they change that quickly :)

Love, loonyforever

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for your review, just to clarify. I wrote about Malfoy as if he never wanted to be what he was, because that is what i imagined as I read through all the books, not a boy who made the wrong decisions but one who had none, who was given no choice. It fits my story. I made Ron leave because, I think that maybe they were best off as friends... I hope this story comes out ok. I'm writing chapter 3 so it should be up soon.

Again thanks for the review.

Perdaha_obsessed


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Review #11, by Kayla A maze of thoughts

17th November 2013:
Oh my god you have to keep writing its like a major cliff hanger there i was like no you have to keep writing for the people for me im in love with the story so far great job cuz im hard to impress

Author's Response: hey, thanks. I love this story as well. There is a problem though, I have the next chapter half way done but I'm going on holidays so the 4th chapter won't be up until,late february... sorry. It's gonna be really hard for me, though I promise I'll keep writing so then you'll get two chapters as soon as I come back!! Please keep reading. Reviews make My Day!!!

Thanks. If you wanna contact me go to my author page. My email is there!!


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Review #12, by EvilLordChocolateMocha A maze of thoughts

16th November 2013:
oh my gosh! that was so good! You're and excellent writer and this story is crazy good. i love the premise and Harry proposed!!! this is going to be great. i'm so excited to read more.

Author's Response: Thanks for reading, I really appreciate each and every review and word, Chapter three is validating, I hope you like it.(I love Harry proposing spontaneously...)

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Review #13, by icingonmycake A maze of thoughts

15th November 2013:
Awesome! i love this story! please please please please please please please keep writing. FINALLY you update! the 7th chapt of Explosion is up btw.
IoMC

Author's Response: Hey, Sorry it took so long to update, my computer wasn't working and it took one week to validate!! I'm going on holidays, so the next chapter will hopefully be up in a week, but after that you'll have to wait two months!!! Sorry, I will be writing though, so you'll get the chapters faster than up until now. I'll be sure to go check out explosion... Thanks for the review.

PErdaha _obsessed


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Review #14, by Stunned Painkillers

12th November 2013:
This is a good chapter, and the story has potential but next time you write a chapter (which I will definitely read) please can you space out your text a bit more? I find it hard to follow when there are massive chunks of text and the speech is hard to follow when you write them on the same line, make sure you leave a line in between each line of speech.
Apart from that, it was really good, keep writing :)
If you have time, please check out my story called 'Lucky'. It's a Dramione too and I would be very grateful for your feedback!
Until the next chapter!
Stunned x

Author's Response: Thanks for your review, you made my day. Of course I'll drop by and check your fic and I'll also leave a review. If you want to contact me or edit my chapters you can find my fanfic email on my authors page (just click on my name next to the chapter name). Also I'll edit the chapter and space out the lines, Thanks for the tip.


Perdaha_Obsessed


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Review #15, by icingonmycake Painkillers

31st October 2013:
I told you i would check it out, and here i am!
Awesome fic! I love it and hope you continue.

Your punctuation could use work though, try to make it flow more easily. But i like the starting and hope it's as interesting going on! Oh and btw the next chappy of Explosion is in the validation queue and should be up soon! keep writing!

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for leaving a review, you made my day.I have realized many of my mistakes and I'm getting a friend to fix them for me, I might update it later on. Right now I'm finishing the second chapter, it should be validating soon. maybe for sunday or monday.
And as soon as the next chapter of explosion goes up I'll be there with a review


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Review #16, by Alexandria Painkillers

22nd October 2013:
hey wanted to say I love this first Chapter and cant wait for the second chapter. Tho I do have to tell you this go to my author's page and you will find a note for you. MsZabini2489

Author's Response: okay, but I don't know how to get to your authors page, I'm new and this is my first fanfic


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Review #17, by MsZabini2489 Painkillers

21st October 2013:
I have to say this, I love the first chapter so far. Please I hope you are getting chapter 2 validated cuz I want to know what is going to happen. I also wish to help with something when I was reading I notice just minor spelling mistakes. But overall I have to say this is going to be one of my favorite fan fictions. I love how you just jumped right in where mine is going to be somewhat slow dramione. Anyways keep the chapters coming as quickly as you can!! MsZabini

Author's Response: Thanks, I would love it if you could somehow help me, I'm new to this whole fanfiction publishing thing so I don't know how it works, I'm writing chapter 2 right now, I'm soo glad you liked it, I thought no one would read it. I had to edit the first chapter three times because it was a bit melodramatic, I hope I can get the next chapter valideted by friday. Thanks soo much by leaving a review. you made my day!!! Thanks

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