Reading Reviews for Close Your Eyes
  
11 Reviews Found

Review #1, by HEG Fading

22nd March 2014:
HI True Author, it's HEG here :).
So I can tell this is going to be a sad story. You have used a nice descriptive opening sentence to say where she is. The only thing I would say to improve your first paragraph is, you've used the word 'the' a lot to start your sentences. Maybe you could think of an alternative.

I get the idea that Tonks is speaking and she is sad that Remus is dead. You have certainly shown the emotion well. Oh this is so sad. Though I do think that sentence is a little humorous where she is saying that Remus was the one who changed diapers, though wouldn't it be Tonks doing that?

I love the last sentence. Simple yet effective. You've done an excellent job here and it was very well written :) keep it up!

HEG :D

Author's Response: Hello HEG! :D

Yup, this is definitely a sad story with the slightest touch of happiness. That's my favourite kind and I wanted to write it for a while. I'm glad you liked that! :) I would look for the alternative of 'the' though I didn't quite get what you mean. PM me if you want to!

Haha, I know that's funny! But to me, Tonks is so clumsy that Remus ended up changing his diapers are telling her to stand aside. xD

I'm happy you liked the last sentence! It is like one of the most important sentences in the story.

Thank you for the lovely review! :D

Ashwini


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Review #2, by 800 words of heaven Fading

8th February 2014:
REVIEW TAG!

So it's been a while since I read something of yours and all I can think is that you've improved so much! You were good before, but this piece really highlights your skills!

I envy your mad skills with description. I'm terrible at it, but you're opening paragraph was just so lovely to read and really set the mood.

I completely adore grasp of these two characters. You understand them so well and that really shines through here. Tonks surviving and holding Remus as he dies is almost sadder than the original ending. I think I like this one more though because there is that tiny ray of hope. Tonks is just so accepting and loving of Remus but she wants him to leave this world with a sense of peace and that's just so beautiful. Sob :'(

I also liked how in the second half that Tonks talks about herself and how Remus impacted her life. It really highlighted that they were in this together as equals and that there's always two sides to any story, which was just lovely and wonderfully executed.

Well done! :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for saying I've improved! I think earlier I was a bit weak in English which kind of put limitations to my writing, but now I've improved my English, thanks to HPFF, and I think that's the improvement you notice. :)

The opening paragraph! I'm so glad you liked it, I had to rewrite it quite a few times to get the descriptions right. It feels good to know it worked.

Characterization is something I worry about, so I'm relieved it's all okay here. :D

Thanks for the awesome review!

Ashwini


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Review #3, by Lady Asphodel Fading

29th January 2014:
Hi! From the review thread! ^_^


Okay...


So...



You started off this fic with an amazing impact of the battle. I felt like I was getting a chance to watch another scene of the Deathly Hallows. :D

I loved how you had Tonks relate to Remus' pain and most of all his worries. I could feel the loneliness and tragedy in her (your) words. *heart breaks*


It was great how you had Tonks reflect on all the things she'll have to do that Remus took charge of.


And the way how you had Tonks reflect on Remus' fears, dreams, etc was an heart-touching moment. It's like I was actually hearing her say this out loud... or I was watching it in the movie.


Additionally, the part where Tonks was "saying?" to Remus how she'll make sure Teddy will never forget him, was a heart-string pulling moment as well. The imagery of her telling the older version of their son of how his dad was a hero played easily in my mind. I also loved how you made Tonks say Voldemort's name despite her fear (it was quite amusing too.)


Furthermore, I believe you did an excellent job with Tonks soothing Remus' painful death. I pictured his head on her lap as Remus was dying. just bravo my dear... bravo...


This was an incredibly enjoyable read, even though it breaks my heart to read Remus (my favorite character) death.

It was beautifully written - and so you keep up the great work! ♥



- Asphodel

Author's Response: Hi again! :D

Thanks for the compliment! It makes me really happy to hear you felt like you were reading DH. I simply love the way JKR has written the battle without stretching it too much and still giving he feeling of war so this means a lot to me. :)

Remus and Tonks are sort of an ideal couple for me, so I found it easy to write them here. I find their love beautiful and this one-shot was like my way of expressing it. I'm glad you liked it all!

Yeah, it broke my heart when he died, the last one from the Marauders, but seeing both of them die leaving Teddy alone seemed a bit unfair to me... So I find it okay to have one of them alive. :)

Thanks for the lovely review dear!

Ashwini


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Review #4, by heartjily4ever Fading

12th January 2014:
Hey, sorry this took so long to get around to, I've been too busy for words.
First of all I think this is a very beautiful fic. Your word choice throughout the entire thing portrays such sadness, that it moved me.
I constantly think about what it would be like if certain people had lived but I'd never really thought about just one of tonks and remus dying. But this is perfect. You've put across their love perfectly, and the way Tonks just revers him above everything else. The way she describes the wolf bite and everything that comes after is interesting as well. Well done. There are a couple of spelling mistakes you might want to check out, but apart from that it was perfect.

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm so glad you liked my choice of words! :) I love expressing sadness through the words I use I guess.

Yeah, there are SO MANY people I wished had survived! Tonks is certainly one of them, as I just LOVE her and Remus, so I decided to write this fic. :)

Even I hadn't imagined just one of them surviving! Maybe that's because of the perfect bond they shared? But I got the idea of a woman with a kid and her husband dying and when I sat down to decide the characters, I was like- "Why not Tonks!" and I immediately scribbled this down. :)

I know about the spelling mistakes! I always end up making them. But I'll surely get back to correct them.

Thanks for the wonderful review! :D

Ashwini


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Review #5, by Secret Sanata Fading

1st January 2014:
So, your final gift is two parts: three reviews and five chapters of beta reading! For two reviews I'm going to review stories I haven't read, the third will be a clue of who I am! I'm going to R&R a chapter of a story that I've already done on my account!

So, I was going through your stories, trying to decide which to review, and I decided I'd read the comments, see what other people thought. I read how moved people were when they read this, and I thought to myself, alright, I have to read this one.

Oh. My. Golly. This story was so powerful, so moving, just wonderful. I don't even have words to describe how much I enjoyed reading this story. It's such a strong story, especially for being a one-shot. This is probably your best story. I know I've already said it, but it's just so powerful. I literally don't have any other descriptive words that I can put to tell you how awesome this story was.

Author's Response: Hello Secret Santa! :D Thanks for all the lovely gifts you've given! Let's see if I can identify who you are...

Yeah, I've received amazing feedback for this story and it makes me so happy that you enjoyed this too. :)

I'm so glad you liked this so much! Yu are making me blush. Anyways, thanks for the wonderful review!

Ashwini


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Review #6, by Red_headed_juliet Fading

5th December 2013:
This is so sad!! I love it! I'm a sucker for tragedy, that's why I picked this one! It is beautifully put together, and I really enjoy it. I like this version of Tonks you've created, loyal, loving, and completely honest with herself. It was a great read. The only CC I have (and they're very little) is to watch for homonyms. (i.e. they're, their, there) and commas in lists. Like I said, little things, very little things.

Thank you for the good read!

Author's Response: I'm a sucker of tragedy too! :D It's great that someone else is with me. ;) Aren't tragedies more beautiful and intense than the happily-ever-afters?

I always found Tonks very interesting character. She never shows her emotional side to the world, but it comes out naturally when Remus is around in HBP. I wrote this one-shot believing the same.

Yeah, I'm aware of the mistakes I've made. I'll correct them as soon as possible. :)

Thanks for the wonderful review dear! :D

Ashwini


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Review #7, by milominderbinder Fading

26th November 2013:
Heya! Here from Review Tag :D

This was an incredibly beautiful piece that honestly broke my heart. You really showed Tonks' heartbreak and the depths of her emotions beautifully. I thought it was a really interesting choice that worked really well to have her being almost logical about his death, trying to be very calm and collected, with her strong emotions peeping through that logic, it really made for a very intense and heartbreaking read. I really like your descriptive writing as well, you have some beautiful lines in here.

I noticed a few small mistakes, for example in the very first line, 'there' should be 'their'. I just point it out because it's a really beautiful line and I hate to see it ruined with a typo!

Some of my favourite lines were:

The floor is stained with a mixture of brave and wicked blood, still fresh and red.

^I love the distinctions of the different kinds of blood, but also the way they are mixed together, kind of showing they are all the same in death.

I have settled down on the floor with your head in my lap, not caring about the blood or my mother's voice calling me back or even my frightened baby crying for me. I cannot see anyone but you. You are important.

^This line just about broke my heart, especially that last, short sentence - it is so simple yet it really betrays Tonks' priorities which makes her loss all the more sad.

You're the one who is sensible, not me. I know that I can't do many things, but I can certainly love.

^Another heartbreaking line which shows her deep connection to him, and also how little she thinks of herself in comparison to Remus.

Overall you just completely broke my heart but in a beautiful way, and I absolutely loved this story, and I just feel for Tonks so much. Well done!

~Maia

Author's Response: Aww, this is certainly one of the best reviews I've ever received! Thank you so much for taking time to leave it for me! :D

Yeah, the mistakes do spoil my writing. I don't know how I always manage to make typos and grammatical mistakes in my stories. :( I don't know what I would've done without the great reviewers like you. :) Thanks for pointing that out! I'll definitely take a look again and correct everything.

I'm glad you liked the lines you've mentioned. :) Maybe I've succeeded in potraying Tonks's emotions nicely because she's one of my favorite characters all the time and I always wanted her to survive the war. That wish was the inspiration for the story.

Thank you again!

Ashwini


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Review #8, by Frizzy Fading

4th November 2013:
Oh you made me cry! This was really very touching. Tonks was so strong here that I feel proud of her. I'm sure she'll be a very responsible mother. I'm glad at least Tonks will be alive for poor Teddy. It's better than keeping him orphan. :(
Lovely one-shot. Will recommend to friends. :)

Author's Response: Hello!
I'm glad I could make you feel what Tonks was going through and her love for her husband. :)
I wrote this one-shot from the same inspiration! I always felt that at least one of them should have survived for poor Teddy.
Thanks for leaving a lovely review! :D
Ashwini


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Review #9, by SofiJane Fading

24th October 2013:
Wow! This was a very interesting read. I think you did a really good job of getting inside Tonks' head. I love her so much! Well done!
Sofi xxx

Author's Response: Thanks for the wonderful review Sofi! :)
I'm glad you liked Tonks. She's my favourite too! :D
Ashwini


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Review #10, by SilverPatronus Fading

23rd October 2013:
i am speechless. there's only one thing i could say. i cried

Author's Response: Aah this review.! I don't know what to say. You left me speechless. :) this is maybe the best review I have ever received.
Thanks a million times for leaving this! It really made my day... :D


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Review #11, by patronus_charm Fading

20th October 2013:
Hey, I saw your status on the forums and decided to pop over.

I thought that you caught Tonks's pain really well. In my mind, she would either be hysterical or composed so opting for the composed side really fitted well with my head canon. Her thoughts about Remus was so measured and moving that it almost brought me to tears to see how strong she was despite him dying.

I really liked how you drew upon the fact that Remus changed Tonks as I do believe it happened and I guess it explained her composed nature. I think the thing which stuck out to me the most was how she said she never expected to fall in love but he made her, it was just so lovely.

Your description in this was great too with the mixture of it with the thoughts it still kept us aware of what was happening in the outside world so we weren't entirely disconnected. The thing which touched me most were Tonk's thoughts about her mother it just made me so sad.

There were a few grammar errors such as incorrect use of there/their and the odd missing comma so another read through will probably pick those out to you, but other than this was a really great one-shot. It definitely did make me all feelsy and I'm glad I decided to read it. :)

-Kiana

Author's Response: Hi there! It's nice you decided to pop over. Thank you! :)

Since I read OoTP, I have found Tonks a very interesting character. She has many sides and many shades, so it's difficult to understand and write her. I have always thought that she is a strong woman. Only a strong woman can be an auror, can dare to marry a werewolf and be in the Order, don't you think so? This idea really helped me writing this fic.

In HBP, we notice many changes in Tonks. It's quite simple that Remus changed her and the pain she felt throughout the year must have made her more mature and thoughtful? After marrying Remus, she must have faced many difficulties and they must have changed her too.

I feel great to know that I succeeded in making this touching. =] I'll surely edit and correct the typos.
Thanks for the lovely review! You really made my day...
Ashwini =]


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