518 Reviews Found

Review #1, by BookDinosaur Bereft: Scorpius POV

17th July 2015:
hey again, beth! this is the fourth, i believe, of the six reviews i owe you. :D i realised just after submitting the last review that i haven't actually congratulated you on winning the challenge in any of my reviews, which is probably a thing that needs to be done, so CONGRATULATIONS! ♥ i'm so silly, honestly

a kitchen accident? i feel like magically indicued accidents are probably a little hard to come by and i kind of doubt that a simple flick of the wand could case so much damage - then again, there was the story of wizard barrufio or whatever, whose mispronounciation of words ended up with buffalos on his chest, so i suppose anything is possible. the main thing you should be taking away from this paragraph is that i am a paranoid lil brat and you prolly shouldn't take anything i say seriously when i'm hypothesising. :P

"I have to use the loo - unless, of course, you want to follow me in there and accuse me of doing something untoward with the toilet.” i think that you were nominated for SOTM best quote at one point (and maybe won as well? it wouldn't surprise me) but i feel like i should congratulate you on this once again bc it took me by surprise and made me laugh. a+ well done on a quote well written

speaking of quotes that i like, i feel like i also need to congratulate you on this one - "Fred was apparently doing something downright amazing out there. i don't know whether you intended for it to be as funny as i found it but i loved it, it was the perfect way to send off this chapter. i mean, i don't even know why, but i love this so much maybe it's because i can taste the sarcasm, and i LOVE sarcasm

and once again, your flashbacks were so well integrated within the story that it didn't seem out of place or awkward at all when you shifted back to present day. i think that if i had one suggestion to make, it would be that maybe you could divide the sections by putting dates on the top of them or something, and then not making them italics? i don't know about anyone else but i found it a little uncomfortable to read italics for so long. that might just be me with my bad eyes being fussy tho, so by all means ignore this if you can't be bothered :P

awh, i love how you express the relationship between rose and scorp! i love that the hanging out which occurs between the two of them isn't a byproduct of teenage rebellion, or getting back at her dad or anything like that - i love how you chose that way to show that she cared about scorp, you know? the two of them and al seem so genuinely fond of one another and sneaking past aurors for one another is a true sign of friendship, i think.

(and just by the by, i loved that little mention of ginny knowing what they were up to but not mentioning it, haha. she's perfect and i love her)

and daphne! i don't remember whether her marrying a muggle is something jk said but i loved that too, and the poor clueless husband going "dear, there are some angry magic people in the house, pls come and deal with them" lololol

but seriously, rose almost seems like a different person in the flashback - especially when we the readers get to know her internal monologue - and this makes me even more curious to see what on earth happened to her to make her fall into this trap of self-loathing and a lack of confidence and just generally feeling broken.

this was such an interesting chapter, beth, and it was great to find out some of the past relationships and experiences that scorpius and rose have shared!

♥ emily

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Review #2, by BookDinosaur Blown Away: Scorpius POV

17th July 2015:
hey again, beth! this is just proving to myself that i don't have to be remarkably late with everything. i said by the end of this week i'd be back, and i am! :D are you not proud of me right now? i'm so proud of myself to be honest :P

ANYWAY. i actually cannot shut up i am the worst i'm sorry REVIEW. YES OKAY

it was really interesting to see a bit of the story from the POV of Scorpius! i mean, i love how you've written him and i can harly believe that this is your first story. within the space of a couple of chapters, you've established Scorpius and Rose both as different narrators with their own voices and perspectives - everyone sees things differently because of their past experiences and perspective and you did an amazing job showing that through the differences in narration between Scorpius and Rose.

i really liked the flashback that you showed the audience, as well! it was an amazing way to contrast rose and scorpius as narrators - she doesn't think of the past AT ALL, and in an opposite fashion, he goes through flashbacks where he relives his past, you know? i don't know whether that was meant to stress the different between the two so intensely, but it was a really nice touch and it did an amazing job establishing that these two are very different narrators within such a short space.

but the actual flashback! i need to talk about this as well. i was wondering about draco's reluctance to let scorpius play something as simple as football - i mean, he's definitely smart enough not to be that obvious in his bigotry, to be honest - but now i'm sort of getting the feeling that draco was trying to protect scorpius?

it made me so sad when scorpius said obviously the rumors going around Hogwarts were true. i mean, it prolly shouldn't affect me that much but the thought that there are still pernicious rumours floating around hogwarts about scorpius' family despite the fact that he's presumably done nothing for years and has generally prolly made sure to be as unoffensive as possible bc he learnt his lesson - it makes me sad, but it's probably realistic. :(

and before we dive into the actual content of the flashbacks i just want to congratulate you on how smoothly integrated the flashbacks are within the chapter. it's so easy to make the flashbacks seem weird and awkwardly placed weithin the text but these seemed very naturally placed. it followed scorpius' train of thought and just generally made sense so kudos to you there

now, the actual content of the flashbacks - i feel like this was absolutely terribly timed for poor scorp. thankfully i haven't been in this situation but i imagine that an argument like that being the last way that you interacted with your parents; that would leave you with a massive case of guilt, eurgh. :/ poor scorpius, honestly. and why were his parents like that? honestly, that's such an awful way to find them and a terrible way for them to die, and even though it looks more like a cooking accident than anything else i'm suspecting foul play bc i am PARANOID and DO NOT TRUST ANYONE.

also, before i sign off, i have to talk about the section at the top as well - it's honestly so lovely to see that scorpius seems to like and feel for rose the same way she likes and feels for him, you know? as i said in a previous review, it sets up for a HEALTHY and BALANCED relationship and i am a BIG FAN OF THIS.

alright this rambled on for far too long, honestly, i'm running out of characters, but this chapter was a really interesting insight into Scorpius' mind and his past and I really loved reading about him!

♥ emily

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Review #3, by BookDinosaur Bent: Rose POV

15th July 2015:
beth!! here for the second of the six challenge reviews that i desperately, desperately owe you. again, i'm so so sorry for the delay

oh my goodness, beth this was an action-packed chapter. ic certainly don't think it was too long, but you managed to get a lot to happen within this chapter! i mean, my characters stop and argue for, like, 3k words and my chapters never go anywhere so major props to you for doing good writer stuff like advancing the plot and moving the story along. you know, all that stuff you seem to do so effortlessly while i'm stuck trying to stop my characters from arguing. anyway, sorry sorry. off topic. i'm the worst reviewer, honestly. i need someone to hit me with a bread roll when i start going off topic.

anyway, plotty stuff. do you see what i mean when i say i respect you for moving your plot along? i can't even move this darned review along, honestly. i suck

your characterisation of rose in this chapter only got stronger than before, to be honest. i love that she was/is close enough to her family that she can joke around with scorpius about how they're probably acting at this party, and at the same time she's just hiding in the corner trying to bury herself away from the loudness and craziness of the party, you know? it seems like a bi of a paradox that she's laughing outside and so scared inside, but it's so realistic and i love it so much.

i really love the way that you've subverting stereotypes and cliches with the situations that you present in this chapter. a lot of the time in next-gen fics, fred or james are throwing wild partiezzz everywhere and the main female oc is like "omg. i'm so awkward. what do i do" and then she goes out and has a good time, you know? but you did a really great job of turning that trope on its head and actually narrating the party from someone who's really nervous and a little scared of being there.

ooh, and we're already getting some touches of scorose!! eyyy :D i love this so much already; how you're not trying to rush it, but they already have a healthy relationship with one another, and i love the way that the two of them were able to joke around together, and you did a really good job with the narration as well because rose's narration immediately seemed more at ease when scorpius was with her and she just seemed more relaxed and that was lovely and i was so happy for her ♥ i also really love that scorpius seems to understand what rose needs and takes her to a quiet place after she's so shocked and sort of in panic mode, you know? he respects her and understands her and that is the basis for an amazing healthy beautiful relationship that's going to be sunshine and rainbows. i can nearly taste it

except for that weird creep who just randomly shows up? how can someone apparate while they're under a body bind curse? i don't understand that but i'm sure it's going to be explained later on, and my guess is that we're going to be seeing more of this creep, oh dear :/ that may get in the way of the sunshine and rainbows

anyway, beth this chapter did a fantastic job of moving the plot along and i have mad respect for you for that. i really enjoyed reading this and whil i don't think i'm going to have time to leave the other four reviews for you tonight, i SWEAR that they well be done by the end of the week. that is a promise

♥ emily

Author's Response: Hi Emily!

No worries!

Eep - it was so *awesome* to wake up to these reviews! Thank you so much. I'm glad you feel that the story is moving along. Like I mentioned in my author's note on the first chapter, this is the very first thing I've written, ever (other than required school assignments). So to be totally honest, I had/have no idea what I'm doing. I just knew I had a story inside me and I began to write it, but I'm really glad that you feel it's flowing well. I didn't want to pace it too fast and I was worried that things were moving a bit too slowly. Thank you for alleviating my fears with that :)

Thanks so much!

♥ Beth

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Review #4, by BookDinosaur Broken: Rose POV

15th July 2015:
beth!! so i am a terrible awful officially the absolute worst person in the world, but i recently hit myself over the head because i realised that i still owe you challenge reviews from the songfic challenge that was actually AGES go. i'm legit the worst and you have every right to shout at me until you're blue in the face. i'm so sorry

but the story! onto the actual story and not padding out this review with long apologies. i don't think that i can say much that hasn't already been said (you have 59, soon to be 60, reviews on this chapter. if i have anything unique to say it will be a miracle) but i will do my best. also, since this story is up to 34 chapters you should totes appreciate the fact that i'm going to be reviewing the six chapters with no idea what's going on. so if you have a twist in there, or a reveal, i'm going to document my genuine shock and it will hopefully be a breath of fresh air from all the Chapter 34 reviews that you're getting.

i'm not making any sense, am i? and i'm absolutely awful at staying on topic. i'm sorry, i'm sorry. lemme try this again

this was a really amazing first chapter. it does a really fab job of introducing rose as our main character and setting up the conflict that i presume is going to be taking place throughout the story, with rose struggling with what sounds like ptsd and trying to get over this awful thing that happened to her.

i love the darker tone that you've decided to adopt with this story, and i love the hints of trauma and ptsd that you've thrown in. you've never tried to preach to the audience and tell them that something is very wrong with rose; instead you've shown that through a panic attack and her thoughts, and i really really appreciate that.

i'm going to say this - well, not upfront since this is prolly hidden deep inside my weird rambling review, but i'm going to say that first person narration doesn't always work out. it's really tricky to try and get inside a character's head and narrate from their point of view, especially when they're going through a tough time, but i think that you pulled it off really well and established rose's voice within this one chapter without it sounding like an author's narration, so really well done there, beth

and the ptsd - it establishes really early on that rose is a flawed character and that she can fall into the trap of self hate which, while not a good thing, is something which does a fantastic job of establishing her character in a really strong way within just this first chapter.

i love the way that you've handled ptsd and trauma in this. again, it's just the first chapter but it's really strong and does leave a really good impression on the reader. while i've never had ptsd myself, the whole thing rose had about focusing on something realy helps with my anxiety and i love love loved that you never implied that rose was a broken or incomplete person just because she's been through something terrible and didn't come out of it unscathed, you know? she's still a person, and she's still struggling and trying to get back to normal, and i think what i'm trying to say here is that i really appreciated the respectful way you handled ptsd in this chapter.

basically, rose if i made any sense at all in this review and you managed to understand any of it you are a miracle, but what you can take away from this really rambly review is that i really enjoyed this first chapter and am looking forward to reading more. once again, i'm so so sorry for the delay that it took to get these reviews to you!

♥ emily

Author's Response: Haha Emily - no worries!

I really wasn't worried about it - but I can't tell you how silly happy the smile is on my face right now. Thanks so much for this :D

I'm literally giggling over this review. I know that I have quite a few on this chapter (and if you wanted to read and leave reviews after a few chapters, that's fine with me as well - but don't feel any pressure).

The reason I'm so happy is that you seem to notice every little detail I tried to put in this opening chapter. My whole concept with this story is that I think the Next-gen kids would have their own "Voldemort" to fight - so look out for that as the story unfolds.

I also wanted to be very, very sensitive to the PTSD and I really worried over that a bit - but thanks for letting me know that you felt it was handled delicately. At this point in the story, Rose hasn't been totally honest with her family about her torture during her kidnapping - and they were all so happy to have her back, they didn't dig too deep.

Thanks again Emily!

♥ Beth

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Review #5, by Tonks1247 Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

11th July 2015:
Alright…alright. I’m not going to freak out and be overdramatic about this chapter…I’ve got this…

So. Rose going crazy with being locked up. I honest to goodness cannot blame her. I cannot handle being stuck somewhere I can’t leave. It’s like when they request I work a double at work after half the first shift has been crazier than all crazy…Like, how can they expect her to be locked in the house, unable to leave, for an undetermined amount of time? It’s really just cruel! And I love this line:

“I can’t take it anymore – I’m locked in my own private Azkaban day after day!”

Rose may be a bit overdramatic here, but honestly? It’s not so much different for her, with being locked away like she is (Although Selenia’s following comment is accurate and had me giggling insanely over here…). It’s just not so good.

And you know…Ruth super bothers me. Her being in Bulgaria doesn’t give me the best of feelings wither and just…I’ve said it in reviews before, and I still don’t know what it is, but she’s really, really bothering me.

That and this line: “Samara…You stay here, in case she comes back. Anyone finds her, send a patronus to the rest of us.”

I have no words to honestly describe why exactly Ruth and Samara’s characters put me off. Ruth just seems…off. I’m not sure I have a good enough explanation for her. She just knows a lot of personal stuff about Rose and I just…it makes me uncomfortable. As for Samara? I just don’t have enough information on her. The unknown unnerves me quite a bit…

Jumping back a little, Rose just leaving the house was a sure fire way to get everyone to see how bad it is to have her locked up. I feel terrible that what Selenia said came across to Rose the way it did. I get that she was defending her but just…it’s tragic that it was taken that way. It’s really not fair.

As to where Rose is? My guess, if anything, is Harry. At least there before home. Although Hermione knows things? But in distress…yeah, I’m sticking with Harry…

Great chapter! :D

Author's Response: Hi there Mikaela!

Okay - I'm SO sorry for being a total jerk and taking so long to respond to you reviews that are TOTALLY AWESOME and completely make my day! I check my iPad the first thing when I wake up in the morning and when I see a review from you I know it's going to be a good day :)

I'm so glad you see Rose's POV. Harry and her parents just want her to be safe - but there's a limit to what a person can take. And even so, she's *just* sort of finding herself again so she needs a bit of freedom to experience life as a proper adult.

I'm afraid I may have missed the mark with my characterization of Ruth. I'll admit, I don't know too much about therapists or the proper treatment for traumatized victims, but I wanted someone that Rose could talk to that wasn't a family member. I also wanted to send a message that therapy is not shameful. I feel bad that she's a suspect for you...

Your instincts on Rose are... very, very good. You know her well.

♥ Beth

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Review #6, by Tonks1247 Bombs and Bonds: Scorpius and Rose POV

11th July 2015:

I don’t even know why I was all over the place reading this chapter. Maybe it’s because Rose just came out and was super honest with Scorpius, and now Scorpius has information he can’t share with Rose, or maybe it’s because Hermione came out and talked about her post-war experience with Rose with a new understanding with her Daughter’s torture now known by her, or maybe it’s because I now see Ron acting a certain way towards Hermione, much the same way Scorpius reacts to Rose…It’s really getting to me in this chapter!

And it is a lovely chapter! Don’t let my flare for the overdramatic (which is weird, because I’m definitely not over dramatic like this in RL…) put off that idea. This plot is ingenious and I love how I can’t really expect something specific to happen because things change so easily and it’s just…it’s really great and I love it!

Anywaysss…I’m anxious to see what additional information comes out about Stannous. That man leaves me with so many questions, about how he can just disappear and reappear wherever Rose is and how he can keep tabs on her and how he knows where she is and who his eyes and ears are…like, the questions are constantly there and I’m just barely able to contain them and not ask them every chapter. ;)

As for Rose and Hermione talking…well, that is one of my favourite scenes so far. “All of a sudden, I felt like I was seven years old again and I laid my head down on her shoulder.” Like, this line here is just so lovely. The fact that Rose feels like she’s a little girl with her mother, seeking comfort only a mother can give…only an understanding a mother can give…it is super sweet and I just adore them and the conversation they have, despite how tough it is.

Following in with that scene, a couple of my favourite lines came up (I could not narrow them down and I’m not sure I even tried…):

“Actually avoiding this moment was the purpose of my entire existence for over two years until…”

“The end is not the end. No words were truer than those.”

“It was a rare moment to witness this tenderness between them.”

You’ve got me so attached to these characters and this story…it’s probably a bit dangerous but I absolutely adore it and look forward to going on to more chapter. Great job dear!


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Review #7, by Tonks1247 Beautiful: Scorpius POV

11th July 2015:
AHHH! Oh my gosh, I forgot about this chapter!

This was such a sweet, sweet moment for the two of them. It was something they both needed, to just both be there and together for a while and to figure out, without words, that they were okay. The fact that an apology didn’t need to be given, that they both understood each other and the emotions that came through…I mean, they should have talked a little bit to clear up the air, but that’s just the logical part of my mind talking. The emotional part of me is in love with this chapter and how it was so sweet and so simple. It was such a great moment for these two, and a needed one for them to be able to move forward with less secrets than before.

And I could go on, repeating how lovely this chapter was, and how well written it was, and how much I love Rose and Scorpius and how much they are such a good fit for each other, but I would honestly just be saying the same thing in a million ways.

Lovely, lovely chapter!

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Review #8, by Tonks1247 Beloved: Scorpius POV

11th July 2015:
HEYA! I’ve returned for a couple more chapters! I’m trying to get through all the currently posted chapters before a new one comes out, but I’m not quite sure if I’ll manage (Though I’ve done a lot better than expected so far…)

So. Again, I love Scorpius’ POV. I’ll try to make it the last time I mention that fact but he is just…his mind is so interesting and I love how he reacts to things. It’s not always what I expect, until I look back on it afterwards. It’s nice, to have his character still be able to surprise me…makes me love him a little bit more.

You gave a lot, without a lot in this chapter. Scorp and Rose saying I love you to each other was really, really sweet. I sort of wish Rose would have had better timing with telling Scorpius about her mum and stuff. Especially because I don’t feel she had enough information to tell him yet, as it seems like he has always struggled with being a Malfoy, especially with Ron making it a big deal, and for her to say it occurred at Malfoy Manner but not name names? It sucks, but at the same time, I can see where Rose is coming from to tell him…

As for running into Ron? Haha, kinda to be expected! It took a while (like, honestly as I was writing this) for me to realize where the Ron section from the last chapter fit in. I’m going to blame it on the fact that I need to sleep, but I was honestly slow on that fact…But. I do like how that sort of brought Ron and Scorpius together, so at least they have an understanding of each other. Also brought on my favourite line:

“Nice place, isn’t this? Harry told me about it. Apparently, Albus brought him here a few months ago, to blow off steam…”

I giggled quite a bit at that….

ALSO: I don’t know why (though I have this sneaking suspicion) that something is up with Samara…I’m definitely not ready to share the idea yet, as I’d like to see a little bit more of her before I let myself go for the idea, but this doesn’t help my case: “I could see why James was attracted to her, but I always felt a little bit like she wasn’t his type – I just couldn’t put my finger on it.”

With that, I think that’s all I have to say on this chapter…it was quite fantastic and I’m looking forward to the next! :D

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Review #9, by Tonks1247 Breakages: Scorpius POV

9th July 2015:
So. That was kinda intense.

I have to start by saying I really do adore Scorpius’ POV. I don’t know what it is about him, but he goes about things in such a different way than Rose. He takes the time to think through situations, knows when to back off and let things go, he’s observant, and, of course, some of his inner monologue makes me laugh. He really is a great character and his adoration for Rose is just so fantastic and I’m pretty sure you’re slowly but surely brainwashing me into loving Scorpius so much that he’s my favourite next gen character…which isn’t half as bad as I made it sound there…I kinda like it actually…

Ron’s POV here was amazing as well. I think, despite not remembering exactly what comes of this conversation, that it is an important little bit to have in there. It gives a good insight to Hermione’s past and opens the doors of similarities between Rose’s struggles and her mothers. Of course, Ron doesn’t know of them quite so well yet, but the fact that he has those connections and had to see Hermione suffer like that…it really kinda hurt. I mean, it’s great, but just…makes me sad.

Rose’s POV again was good as well. I like how she continually recognizes that he’s not his family. I do think she should, you know, say that to Scorpius more than once (since Ron’s so good at telling him the opposite and he doesn’t hear differently…), but just the fact that she knows that and loves him…I just really love the two of them and their dynamic. You build them such a loving relationship and I really, really adore it.

As for favourite lines here in this chapter:

“Sure. He gets a warning.” “That settles it. Albus is her favorite.”

“Look, if you idiots wouldn’t be so proud and moronic and simply go to St. Mungo’s to get treated first, I wouldn’t have to be here.”

Both made me giggle just a little bit. :D

Anddd before I forget. I love how you had all the chapters that start with ‘break’ all in the same day! I must then question…does this occur with all of the chapters that begin with the same word? I may have to investigate that a bit further to see…also…why the letter B? (Curiosity killed the cat…and I won’t make that lame joke about me not being a cat because that would be lame ;) )

Great job! Great chapter!

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Review #10, by Tonks1247 Breakable: Rose POV

9th July 2015:

Seriously. This edge of your seat, what’s happening next, is everyone okay thing, after having already read through these chapters, is killing me! I mean, I do love quite dearly how easily I can get into these chapters and how once I get into it again, I don’t want to stop, but this anxiety…I really love your writing. We’ll leave it at that.

I think you pick quite believable emotions for Rose after getting to the Potter’s house. She’s bound to become angry because she is pretty well trained with all kinds of defensive spells and the fact that she tends to just freeze up (Though it is super understandable) when danger is around is quite alarming. I also love how you have her speak to Ginny a bit, only to find out that her mum underwent similar things while on the run during the war. I really think it brings a new understanding to Rose about her mother and why her mother is the way she is. I also feel it brings mother and daughter closer together, as she doesn’t seem to be the first person Rose turns to.

As for Scorpius showing up? Well, against protocol isn’t exactly when he should be seeing her, but he does help relieve a lot of the anxiety (And it fits his character so well, that it really helps shape his character and his relationship with Rose.) with having information about the other family members. I feel terrible for Dom and hope that she’s alright, and Al, being a bit of stubborn pain about getting himself looked at and healed up. Makes sense, given his parents, but at the same time…really?

As for favourite lines this chapter:

“I held onto her the way I’d done when I was a small child. The world was so much more frightening than I ever thought it could be. She gripped me with such ferocity that I couldn’t tell who was consoling whom.”

You really broke my heart there, in a sweet way (if that makes any sense). The fact that their bond as mother and daughter is so strong and that they have this new understanding about how difficult life is and that they both understand…it’s tragically beautiful!

Great chapter!

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Review #11, by Tonks1247 Breakout: Rose POV

9th July 2015:
HOW COULD YOU END A CHAPTER LIKE THAT? I mean, I totally knew things were about to go down with Rose wanting to go out and all, but then to end a chapter with death eaters swarming a room with Scorpius telling Rose and Lily to leave him on his own?! Like, what is this! He first of all left Al alone and now he’s getting Rose and Lily to leave him alone as well and then you end the chapter and how am I to know what’s going to happen? (Besides reading the next chapter, which I’m pretty sure I HAVE to do at this point…) It’s just cruel (Though cliff hangers are just about my favourite things ever…just more so when I write them apparently)

What else can I say about this chapter…oh yeah!

AHAHAHAHA! Dom is like, the best ever. She picks quite the questions to scream at the top of her lungs at Rose and the fact that she doesn’t just let it go until Jax comes and interrupts her…I honestly just had to laugh. It fits in with the picture of Dom I have in my head and it was just funny, especially with how casual Selenia is with her sly grin and all…it really was entertaining!

Other than that…I think that’s it for this chapter. I didn’t pick out any particular lines that I fell in love with or laughed at (or at least ones I could share in a review), so I guess that’s it for this chapter…onto the next! :D


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Review #12, by Esha Bated Breath: Scorpius POV

8th July 2015:
Hi! I have been reading ScoRose fanfics for two years now and I can't believe it took me so long to find yours. Probably because I usually read completed fanfics. I have to say I LOVED your story so far. It is I think one of the best ScoRose Multi-Chapter stories that I have read (and mind you, I have read more than 150 of them) I have been hooked since I started reading the first chapter two days back. As of now, I have read all 34 chapters. I have loved every single chapter so far. Obviously there are so many questions in my mind that I think pretty much every reader is having as well.

About the recent events: I think the person behind Rose's fall could be Samara? I don't know I think she is only person with blond hair than can be in Number Twelve and do it without any problem. Am I right? Close? I am waiting eagerly for the next chapters. You are amazing. So is this story.

Author's Response: Esha!

This review was so awesome to log in and see! You've made my day! Gah - I'm so, *so* excited that you're enjoying the story so far.

And ooo - those are very good guesses - but my lips are sealed right now. I'm planning on updated with a little more frequency for the next couple of months.

Thanks again - I really appreciate that you took the time to leave me a note!

♥ Beth

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Review #13, by Tonks1247 Breakdown: Rose POV

3rd July 2015:
Heya! So, I have to get up in a couple hours, but have decided that another review wouldn’t hurt. Because, you know, I may regret it in the morning, especially when I get distracted in other things and am still only three sentences into this review after a half an hour.

So. Ruth. I do not like her. She seems like a suspicious character. Which is actually kind of funny. Because Ruth comes in after the majority of the Stannous stuff occurs and seems unrelated to the Stannous situation but I still don’t want to trust her. Rose says a lot to her and she just…she’s suspicious. I can’t even explain why. I just get that feel about her…

As for that whole hospital, bus, apparating thing…wow. Rose being put in charge for a bit and then figuring out what seemed to be going on...it’s intense. I feel a bit bad about it being her first loss of a patient (I work in the medical field and have lost residents in like, a nursing home setting, but they never passed away in front of me or while I was in at work or anything and I can only imagine what it will be like after I become a nurse and go through that…). I think you do a great job getting Rose’s thoughts and feelings into line with everything else that is happening in that scene.

As for Rose and Scorpius after that? Dear lord. I hope they realize if they talk to each other, things tend to work out between them better. The whole ‘let’s not talk about it curse’ really just makes life suck for the both of them and creates more problems that wouldn’t exist if they could just speak to each other.

Going right with that, Rose’s inability to speak made me roll my eyes (in a not as irritated of a way as that sounds): “I was sure the hospital staff would know about it, but if I asked them, it might lead to a discussion that I didn’t want to have.”

And, rather than ending on a favourite quote, I’d rather end with the phrase that definitely sounds like an end all situation that isn’t a bright idea (You know, the part of the horror movie where everyone screams don’t open the door, but the main character goes ahead and opens it anyways and then something pops out and everyone jumps and screams even though they knew it was going to happen? Yeah, one of those!)

“I want to go out.”


Great chapter! Quite enjoyed and I’m sure the next is going to be action packed! Hopefully I’ll be back soon to get to it! :D


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Review #14, by Tonks1247 Breakthrough: Scorpius POV

3rd July 2015:
Hiya Beth!

So. Before I get too far into this review. I need to share an observation. Every chapter title starts with the letter B. And there are a series of Break and Bound starting a couple of them. And I /just/ now realized it.

Moving on.

WHY MUST THESE QUESTIONS ALWAYS RETURN?! I don’t understand how Stannous got past the wards for the party or in Rose’s flat. Like, they are famous kids who have always needed wards, and with maybe just a smidge of paranoia from their parents, are taught to put them up right…It has to be some sort of inside job, but honest to goodness, who? Who would have it out for Rose? And anti-apparition within the flat should stop Stannous but it doesn’t. Is there something about the Anti-apparition wards that gets placed by the ministry? I wouldn’t think so, but where would he have someone on the inside?! LIKE SERIOUSLY WHY DID KALI HAVE TO BRING ALL MY QUESTIONS BACK TO MIND?!

Also, the new question: Why did Stannous take Rose for 6 days and then return her?

And I feel bad for Scorpius. This is a lot of stress about his girlfriend to have to handle. It’s too much for Rose to have to handle. Like, no one should have to handle stuff like this.

SIDE NOTE (Since I’m good at them): Colleen Creevey takes me a lot of brain power to read correctly. Could be the current hour in the morning, but Colin keeps interfering with Colleen. And that would be the end of this side note… xD

And I think that’s it for this chapter. It was shorter, but still gave rise to a lot of important questions and points! Great job!


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Review #15, by Tonks1247 Befuddled: Rose AND Scorpius POV

3rd July 2015:
Hey Beth!

Had to laugh. Definitely can tell I’m mixing some chapter reviews here, as I’ve already talked about Harry being secret keeper and trying to keep it from Ron during my last review…but you know, I have to leave reviews for all these chapters because they are just too great not to and you deserve them! So much work goes into writing a novel and I just…I have to appreciate everyone who gives them a go and keeps them updating which leads to more reviews!

(Okay, need to get on topic. Should probably go to bed now that I’ve been off work for 3 hours, but not feeling it…bear with the random xD)

I love the little side mission Al, Dom and Scorpius have, working alongside the work they already do for Auror training. Also love the mentees getting in on it too. They add an interesting dynamic that I quite enjoy. Especially with how well they work with who they are paired with. I think it makes Al, Dom, and Scorpius character’s more understandable, in a way, because it gives them someone to interact with that isn’t quite as close in relations and just overall…I kinda like them.

These two also tick me off just a little bit. Dancing around each other…in a way, it’s expected with Rose/Scorpius, but it doesn’t change the fact that they should just /talk/ to each other so everyone is on the same page. It obviously turns out better for them both if they do xD (In which case, I thank Dom for calling Rose out on it because seriously…she’s a bit slow and Scorp isn’t much better)

I’m also fascinated by the healing spell Scorpius uses. I love the lead up to it and how Scorpius recognizes the limits and just talks Rose through her panic. And then he brings up trying something, and this spell…it’s fascinating. It adds such a dimension to the Malfoy family, with it being a spell that’s passed on…(I’m not quite sure if dimension is the word I want but ancient stuff like that getting passed on adds something to the Malfoy name, you know?) Also, the fact that he uses it more so to make Rose feel better than to make her look better…it just made me smile with how sweet he is!

(Did I also mention that the way I imagine Scorpius talking to Rose and calling her Ro kinda gets to me and makes me smile like an idiot? Like, it’s so freaking adorable and it’s really just great!)

The other thing I wanted to add, from my first read through: Ruth unsettles me. She seems to make things personal, with use of just her first name, and with Rose telling her things as her therapist…I don’t like it. I don’t know why, but I definitely don’t…

AND. My favourite parts of my reviews. My favourite line (though any of Scorpius’ commentary here makes me giggle):

“You smell good,” I commented when I could detect the scent of lavender wafting off her locks. Did that sound weird? I don’t want her to think I’m some sort of a creep.”

Haha, great job with this chapter! I’m thinking at least one more before I go to sleep…


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Review #16, by Magarie298 Bated Breath: Scorpius POV

2nd July 2015:
Beth! This chapter left me hungry for so much more! But it was a really sweet chapter. I think after the last few chapters being so intense this chapter seemed like a nice breath of fresh air. However, I'm still so curious as to how Rose ended up in this situation. While I have a few theories bouncing around in my head, nothing is solid without a little confirmation ;)

Healer Lawrence made me quite upset in this chapter. I mean I know it's his job to try and heal, but was calling security really necessary?

Al really has become one of my favorite characters. He is so protective of the people he cares about. It's really sweet.

I can't help but think that the reason Rose's heartbeat began to come down as Scorpius was talking to her is because of his "special magic" that we saw in chapters past. There seems to be a connection however, just a guess here.

As usual amazing chapter. Sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for the next one!


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Review #17, by Tonks1247 Back to the Beginning: Rose POV

29th June 2015:
Beth! I’m back! Took me a while, as I was going to read and review another chapter the other night, but then another event for the house cup started and then I left on vacation which, turns out, did not provide me with much wifi as I expected to have, and so bring us to now, where I’ve since found some time to get some reviews going again. YAY!

And, just before I go into this chapter, your review responses have been the greatest things ever! I have absolutely adored reading them as they make me smile and giggle a bit! I’m glad you’ve enjoyed reading them and hope I can continue to leave some fun reviews, maybe even catch up to how far I’ve actually read (I may have finished reading all of the chapters and am just jumping back through to drop reviews and thoughts on chapters but then again maybe not, but it’s a definite possibility…;) ).

So. This chapter. That was a good wind down from the previous intensity that had me all but leaping out of my seat in anticipation of what was to come. I like how you slowed it down but still had some anxiousness and stuff in this chapter. And by that I mean, you have Rose waking up and sort of freaking out on Scorpius as she hadn’t known it was him with her. She also has some of that anxiety as she then has to relive parts of her fears in order to go speak to Harry and fill him in on what has happened. I liked how it was present, but not overwhelming, because it continued to set up the fact that Rose is super anxious about everything that is going on and unfolding when she tried so hard to hide it in her past, but at the same time, there is time to settle down and be okay and see that things are trying to be worked out to be better.

I love that Scorp and her both took a day off to be with each other and just to unwind. I kind of sort of really adore Rose and Scorpius together in this and for them to have this time and to try to sort through their emotions and expectations and just being people for a day. Also love how Scorpius still has that calming effect and the description and approach you take to those instances are quite fantastic as their consistent with his character and hers and just…you do quite a lovely job of keeping Rose and Scorpius in this relationship that maintains itself, despite all the changes going on.

Also, this whole not telling Ron thing…I don’t know how well this will work out. I mean, the whole Rose/Scorp thing…well…it should be interesting. Especially with moving them to Grimmauld Place with the fidelius charm…Harry as secret keeper isn’t the most difficult, as Harry can just be like hey, they’re moving here so they don’t know it’s under the fidelius charm, but just…I don’t know. With Hermione’s history with Malfoy manner…well, I’m going under an assumption that Rose isn’t in on that whole situation that occurred…

Also. Love Rose and Harry. I really really do like how their relationship is so close and that Rose is comfortable to let him in on things and reassure him when she, herself, needs her own reassurances. It’s just nice to have that father/daughter thing going on, as I’ve previously mentioned…

And, to close out here, my favourite line from this chapter…

“I was playing a fool’s game, thinking that I could actually be normal.”

Okay, favourite may be a bad term as all it makes me want to do is smack Rose because we all know it’s not true, even though she’s in denial, and her and Scorpius would be perfect, will be when she finally gives in and just…well…yeah. Fool’s game is what they make it out to be xD

Great job with this chapter! :D


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Review #18, by CambAngst Bated Breath: Scorpius POV

26th June 2015:
Hi, Beth! I read this chapter a week ago and writing this review has been on my to-do list ever since. Let's see if I can fix that this morning!

So you've now compounded the mystery of who attacked Rose with the mystery of why the healers can't keep her heart rate under control. I'm looking all over for suspects here. Based on the blond hair from the last chapter, I didn't feel like I could completely rule out Scorpius. Whether he was possessed or under the influence of some curse or whatever the reason, the details would fit. But then we see the calming effect he has on Rose in this chapter and it makes me less suspicious. Then again, sometimes when you make me less suspicious, that makes me more suspicious. You see the complex relationship I have with this story. ;)

The next common thread that runs through everything bad that's happened to Rose (the attack on her flat, the attack on the pub and the attack at Grimmauld Place) is Selenia. In her case, the question would be motivation. She's obviously had plenty of opportunities to kill Rose along the way, without any interference from anyone, so why would she resort to such brazen tactics and then help to keep Rose alive. Unless, of course, her objective isn't to kill Rose but instead to draw Rose and Scorpius together. Perhaps more people than just Hermione understand that the prophecy likely refers to Scorpius and Rose, not Stannous and Rose. Perhaps there are forces conspiring to bring about the birth of Rose and Scorpius's child, but intending to kidnap and raise the baby for their own, nefarious purposes. So perhaps cursing Rose to raise her heart rate was a plan to try to force the healers to take the baby early? Or perhaps I'm overthinking this by a mile.

The last thread is the woman at St. Mungo's who also worked at the pub. She would be an untidy solution, since she wasn't around for the attack on Rose's flat. Unless... hmmnn... I can't remember which happened first, the incident where all of the splinched victims came to St. Mungo's or the attack on the flat. I might have to go back and check.

Anyway, along with this chapter. I really liked Scorpius's private little confession to Rose in the hospital room. It's pretty much everything that I think all of your readers have been thinking for several chapters now. It also reminds me a bit of a scene that you'll see near the very end of CoB, so we have some nice synergy working here. ;)

I'm a little conflicted about the way Scorpius's presence affects Rose's condition. Don't take this the wrong way, but it felt a little too easy to me. Throughout the story, you've done such a great job of detailing the struggles that these characters face and showing how they're able to overcome them. It's not that I wish difficulty on Rose and Scorpius, but it felt a little awkward in the context of the rest of the story.

Healer Lawrence seems like a great, thunderous jerk. By the time the big confrontation is filling the room, I was rooting for Albus to curse him.

Again, we see Selenia intervening at the perfect moment to prevent something from happening to Rose that might hurt the baby and to bring Rose and Scorpius closer together. Why does this character doing such a wonderful, selfless thing make me so suspicious??? This is what you do to me, Beth!!!

I liked the contrast you were able to create between the amusing chaos going on outside of Scorpius's silencing spell and the very touching moment happening inside of it. It's as though there were two separate worlds coexisting in the same room, divided by this semi-transparent barrier.

That's mostly all I have. I enjoyed it thoroughly, but I am filled with suspicion. Whodunnit? Who? WHO?

I hope we find out soon. Can't take much more. :p

Great job!

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Review #19, by tangledconstellations Broken: Rose POV

23rd June 2015:
Hey there!

I'm swinging by for the BvB review battle but also to leave your 500th review on this fic!

Congratulations!! That's such an achievement! 500! :D you deserve it - it's obvious you've put so much time into this fic :) I've always wanted to read this but have never quite got round to it, so this seemed like a very good opportunity to.

This was such a fab first chapter. I think you've done an awesome job on establishing Rose's character and sort of familiarising us with her thought processes. I like that this chapter has a darker undertone. It's really interesting, and has me intrigued for what is to come. There are already questions that I want answering - what is it that has frightened her so much? What is she remembering that is making her suffer? - although it's even more enticing because I feel like it's the kind of question that can't be answered in one chapter. It's obvious the effects of whatever happened are really sticking with Rose, and so right now I'm curious but I know whatever is to come is gonna be something big.

I really really like your writing style - you adopt the way Rose is thinking and pushing herself on really well. Even when you told us about the Sorting Ceremony, it didn't feel like a deviation - it was still a part of Rose's thoughts, told through her eyes. You have a real knack to remaining in the present, with Rose, but also giving us just enough information and backstory to get us all the more invested in your fic. I like the setting too - Healer training! That's just awesome. And I also really like that Rose isn't 100% capable. She comes across to me as a really realistic character - someone that is struggling with something, someone that sometimes finds it hard to live her life. I think we can all relate to that in some degree. I think that's why I already like her so much.

This was such a fab chapter and reading it, I can't believe I haven't started it before! I'll definitely be reading on soon :)

(also, again - 500!! Yay!! *hugs* ♥)

Laura xxx

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Review #20, by merlins beard Bated Breath: Scorpius POV

22nd June 2015:
Hey Beth!
Your updates make me super excited! This was so awesome to read! I love that Scorpiua realizes what he and Rose both need is for him to be there with her and the baby. He won't be the kind of bad influence he fears he'll be.
It's so sweet that he can calm Rose's heartbeat when the healers can't. Selenia did really well, recognizing what was going on and fighting for what she believed was right.
Albus... I love Albus for defending Selenia, but there might have been a better way to solve the problem...
That healer is terrible. I don't like him at all. Now that she's awake, Rose should request a different healer.
I can't wait for the next chapter


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Review #21, by k1187700 Bated Breath: Scorpius POV

20th June 2015:
YAY! You updated to fast! For saying how dramatic this chapter was, you made it really funny! I think it was so perfect to make it funny too because things have been to tense and depressing for the last few chapters it made me laugh even more, if that makes sense? Sometimes with comedies they try to be funny all the time and it unbelievable, and with dramas, the constant drama gets you down so yes. Really enjoyed it :)

So I've been thinking about this conundrum with her heart rate coming up after she was admitted. So something while she was in the hospital must have done this and I can't help but notice that the time they were attacked in the pub the cockney healthcare assistant was also there, and obviously she was there in the hospital when she started to decline. . . Just spit balling here. I do like a mystery.

Despite loving mysteries, I also like answers. I know you updated this one so quickly but I am greedy and would love love LOVE another chapter asap! ;P

Author's Response: Hi hi!

I feel kinda bad because I don't think I updated very fast (it was over a month :( ). But I'm so, so excited to see you back! Eep! Haha - I don't wanna say too much, but I think you're VERY observant :)

I've got about another week of sheer insanity in my real life, so after that updates should be a bit more regular!

Thanks again!

♥ Beth

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Review #22, by Tonks1247 Bombarda Maxima: Scorpius POV

20th June 2015:
Wow. Well, that was just. Wow. Emotion wise, I think you nailed it. I don't know if it's because I'm already so attached to Rose and Scorpius and htem being together or what, but I could feel Scorpius' feelings and his anger. I couldn't exactly keep up with it as soon as the forest game, but it was evident in your writing that his pain was there, that there was anger and everything else. It was really really well written.

On a side note here, Forest of Dean? Brilliant. Perfect place to go destroy some trees and such...

On topic. Dom, Al, Selenia characters were great as well. I love how defined thier characters are, and how they have mannerisms they stick to. I find writing and involving so many characters difficult but you do such a fantastic job. I feel almost as if I could read a situation involving two characters and be able to name which says what or does what. It's really kinda awesome.

There were two small things I noticed in this chapter:

"I did’t know who Albus was asking." -didn't is spelled incorrectly (missed a letter)

"He continued attacking every tree in his path, using nonverbal -spells at this point." -the dash in this sentence really isn't necessary, I don't think...

Overall, fantastic chapter! I'm trying to decide how important sleep is, because if I hold off for just a little while longer, I could get another one or two in...hmm.


Author's Response: Hi Mikaela!

I'm sorta working backwards through my unanswered reviews, here - and I don't have a rhyme or reason to it, so I might continue in this manner, and I might switch it up ;)

Anyway, I REALLY appreciate all your feed back. I've already updated the chapter with your suggestions - thanks for finding those typos.

This chapter was actually the very first thing I wrote for this novel. I started here and wrote forward for 5 months from this point in the story, THEN I decided to post the story on this site and had to write the beginning chapters. I know it sounds really weird, but I had never written anything before this - and I just kinda did it how it came to me.

Glad you like the Forest of Dean - it comes back later.

Ooo! Thanks for your comment on characterization - I don't have much to say, they are so ingrained in my head, it's almost like I already know how they're going to react to each situation. And I have no explanation for that, other than this story started to form in my head and I couldn't stop it - hee hee!

Thanks again - it was such a treat to wake up this morning to these reviews!

♥ Beth

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Review #23, by Tonks1247 Besieged: Rose POV

20th June 2015:

So. Casual Thursday night. Hang out with a ton of friends, chat because course work is cooperative to allow an off night, snog the boyfriend (whether Rose and Scoprius have defined it or not...) forever just because you can. And then BAM! Stannous.

Not cool, just not cool...

I think what makes this chapter even better is that Rose's confusion, inability to go for her wand, to turn out of the room sooner, and her anxiety...I could feel it all. I found myself on the edge of my seat, anxious for her safety. I think the only relief I had was getting caught up in questions because I just knew, as soon as Dom showed up, that she woudln't get taken again. Though those questions do NOT make me feel any better.

How did Stannous get in? How is he keeping track of her? Who are these accomplices? Is there someone he knows that also knows Rose and Rose doesn't know about the connection which is how Stannous knows things? Or is Stannous some super creepy guy who knows some creepy magic that allows him to be a creep? Like, seriously. How did he find her and get in?! Or get out? Is he getting out? Okay, well, maybe not so much is he getting out...with this story still continueing, obviously they don't have him, but like...seriously. What?

Okay. Now that the ranting is outta my system. My favorite line from this chapter...

"We could talk about everything and nothing at the same time and, next moment, couldn’t keep our hands off each other."

May know something about talking about everything and nothing...have no idea how it works...

Great chapter! Can't wait to read more!

Author's Response: Hi Mikaela!

Haha - I wish you could see my face right now because I'm all giddy and smiley while I'm reading your review. Part of me want to answer your questions for you - but I'm NOT gonna do that! And the other part of me is so excited because you HAVE questions.

Ha! I love that line too. It's the mark of a good, budding relationship. One point that I wanted to hammer home here is that Rose isn't being completely honest with Scorpius at this point. I know she's been through an ordeal, but in order to move forward, she's gonna have to come clean about her demons.

And yeah, Stannous has some serious magic - or connections - or both...

Still not gonna tell ;)

Thanks so much!

♥ Beth

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Review #24, by CrimsonCharmRose Beating Heart: Scorpius POV

15th June 2015:
gah... please write more. It's so good!!!

Author's Response: Aww, thanks so much for leaving a review! I'm so happy you like the story. I'm editing the next chapter now!

♥ Beth

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Review #25, by Tonks1247 Better: Rose POV

13th June 2015:
I love this relationship between Rose and Harry. I don't know why, but the fact that Harry is so fascinating with her and that he loves her dearly, just like her father, is just...it's so perfect. I like htat she visits with him too. Really shows how tight knit some members of the family are.

Also adore Rose's way of being. I love that she stopped Al and insisted on healing him up. Same as Harry. Also, how casual her and Scorpius set up a time to meet? In front of Harry and Al? With Al's reaction as they headed back to training, love it!

I liked how Harry said something about Scorpius fancying her too. Especially the bit about she woudln't normally discuss things like that with Harry, but couldn't help but admit it to him. Really sweet. Really good build on thier relationship!

Short chapter, but I think it was quite effectively used and I loved the short read.


Author's Response: Hi there, Mikaela!

I've taken some heat over the Rose/Harry relationship, but I stand by it. I feel like Ron never really became very good with women. At some point he was able to figure out what made Hermione tick, but (especially) when it came to his daughter, he was at a bit of a loss. Harry on the other hand, has the benefit of being a bit removed from Rose - he doesn't have to be the one to tell her 'no' on most occasions (growing up) and was really, really enamored with her as a small child.

Harry also has a soft spot for Scorpius. He sees a lot of himself in the younger Malfoy - losing his parents so young and having to deal with infamy at Hogwarts. He wants both of them to be happy - EVERYONE is rooting for them, but they seem to be a bit daft and need a little push in the right direction.

Thanks again!

♥ Beth

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