250 Reviews Found

Review #1, by UnluckyStar57 Bombarda Maxima: Scorpius POV

21st October 2014:
Holy... wow. More loaded chapter-ness!

Good gosh, this is review 250 for this story. I'd better make this a good one!

So... There was so much aggression, so much anger from Al and Scorpius, and through their awful rage, I could really see how their own pasts were impacting the feelings of guilt that they were having about Rose and Stannous. Scorpius has had a pretty messed up life, and Albus has a few daddy issues to worry about. They love Rose, but they were too wrapped up in themselves to really question the damage that Stannous did to her in the past. This chapter is the unveiling, the revelation of that particular mystery, and now that their eyes are opened, they feel terrible. I loved how united they were in those moments, vowing to protect Rose and seek out Stannous and his gang in order to exact revenge for Rose's suffering.

Ugh, the encounter with Stannous had a bigger impact on Rose than you let on in the previous chapter! Convulsions, vomiting, blacking out, et cetera--that's something that sounds truly terrible to experience, and even though she didn't feel any pain after she blacked out, it must have been scary. I don't blame Dom for telling Scorpius and Al to back off! After all, they have no idea what to do to help Rose. Destroying the Forest of Dean is pretty much their only way to release their frustrations!

Over all, this was a really awesome chapter. There were so many raw emotions there, especially with Al and Scorpius in the forest. One thing that I would recommend to you is that you maybe put a little more description into Rose's whole convulsion/fainting scene. It feels a little bit sparse compared to the massive picture that you paint during the boys' scene. Playing up the drama is never a bad thing (usually)! Also, just be sure to check your verb tenses and spelling whenever you edit. There was nothing major, but as always, it's nice to go back and catch the little things that you miss when first posting a chapter. :)

Brilliant work! I will continue reviewing this story whenever I find the time and/or get a chance to catch you in the Review Battle! :D

~UnluckyStar57

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Review #2, by UnluckyStar57 Besieged: Rose POV

21st October 2014:
Oh my... Loaded chapter alert! D:

I'm finally coming back to give you two more reviews--that 250 mark is looming closer for this story! :D And I'm so glad that I helped you catch that chapter mix-up last night--it was just a bit confusing for me when I read it the first time. :P

Okay, so things are starting to happen to Rose, and I'm really starting to see the reason for her various neuroses throughout the first few chapters. Stannous was obviously a creep and a pedophile of some sort, and that is NOT okay. Of course, he was probably more than just a pedophile--I can picture him having the goal of world domination in mind--but for some reason, he zeroed in on Rose as a target for his sadistic fantasies. Like, ew. That is some twisted stuff, but it adds so much intrigue to the storyline! How did you come up with this sinister baddie, and how do you write him torturing Rose with a clear conscience?! (Just kidding--every good story needs an antagonist. Yours just happens to be SUPER creepy.) :)

Well, at least Rose and Scorpius's relationship is going swimmingly. :) I'm so glad that they finally admitted their long-lasting feelings for each other and that they're able to establish some sort of closeness, despite all of the emotional/mental baggage that they both have. The description of Rose's happiness at seeing Scorpius is really cute, and I'm so glad that they get to have a few moments of fun and lurve before Stannous steps in to complicate matters...

However, I found myself wanting more Rose/Scorpius interaction after the last chapter. Because of Scorpius's arranged meeting with Rose, I expected to see that arranged meeting and the exact situation that came from it. By starting this chapter several days later, I feel like I missed a little bit of the story. But that's just kind of a personal preference for me, I think. I mean, I get the idea that they would've been like, "I lurve you so much," but I kind of wanted to see it happen. Ah well, what you've written is enough--romance sort of has to take a backseat to action, anyway.

A few notes on semantics:

Parts of this chapter are in present tense, which doesn't seem to make sense within the context of the past tense narration that encompasses the majority of the story. Perhaps that's something to look over when you get a chance to edit. :)

Also, a few of the spells were not spelled (lol, a pun) correctly, and that's not a huge deal, but I thought I should point it out. (I'm a big fan of spelling, sorry.) Maybe check out the Lexicon when you edit, just to make sure you get the spelling right.

Other than that, I have no complaints about this chapter. It really furthered the action along, and it made me want to read more! (Which is what I will be doing as soon as I finish typing this review.) I can't wait to see what will be done about the whole Stannous situation, especially if he's been stalking Rose like a total weirdo.

~UnluckyStar57

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Review #3, by UnluckyStar57 Better: Rose POV

20th October 2014:
Hi Beth! I noticed that ASLTW is only 3 reviews away from 250, so I'm pretty set on giving you that 250th review. And I'm just procrastinating again, so here we go! :D

Okay, so the first part of this chapter involved so much "D'aw"-ing from me. My roommate is sitting in the living room with me, and she was really confused. But I had to "D'aww" because THE ROSE AND HARRY DYNAMIC IS SO CUTE!!! It absolutely never occurred to me to think about what sort of relationship they might have, and this is totally headcanon for me now. Like, in most Next Gen fanfic, you don't see a lot of the Next Gen gang relating to their elders in a way that isn't bad/sad/angsty, so I'm incredibly surprised and pleased to see such an adorable relationship between Rose and Harry. Sad to say, though, it seems as though Harry gets along better with her than he gets along with Albus. :P Ah well...

And I must admit, I was a little bit disappointed that you didn't write about the weekend that Rose and Scorpius spent together, but maybe they're going to talk about it in the next chapter? I don't know... But when you started this chapter out with Rose and then connected it to the action from the last chapter, I was like, "DANG, THAT SEGWAY THOUGH!" (Yes, it is necessary to use shouty capitals.) I was just incredibly impressed with how you connected Rose's PoV to Scorpius's PoV. So tell me, how do you do that? Do you write several chapters from Rose's PoV and then go back and fill in Scorpius's part (or vice versa)? Do you just write in alternating PoVs? Impart knowledge unto me, o wise one! :D

...Maybe it's too late for me to be writing reviews... Oh well.

Anyways, super cute and marvelously fab chapter. I can't wait to read about Rose and Scorpius's meeting!

~UnluckyStar57

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Review #4, by BellaLestrange87 Bent: Rose POV

19th October 2014:
Review tag!

I don't know why I didn't come back to this sooner. I read, reviewed, and enjoyed the first chapter for last month's Blue vs. Bronze review battle. Bear in mind I'm writing this review as I read the chapter.

Anyways, on to the actual chapter. I like Rose - even though she has what looks like a combination of post traumatic stress disorder and anxiety (although I'm not 100% sure) she doesn't let it rule her life. I can definitely see the determination and resemblance to Hermione there. She definitely doesn't want anyone to know about her panic attacks, which is completely understandable. Anybody who doesn't have them themselves wouldn't understand what it's like.

Scorpius definitely likes Rose. He's acting nervous while around her, trying to make casual conversation. At least he's comfortable with Rose and doesn't turn into a moron whenever he tries to talk to her.

Wolfram Longbottom sounds like exactly the kind of child that would be born from Neville and Hannah Abbott. They're both gentle at heart, and the mocking that Rose and Scorpius do suggests that Wolfram is as nervous about himself as Neville was in his first few years at Hogwarts.

You missed one punctuation mark - when Scorpius mentions Samara Tinsman the paragraph says: “That is Samara Tinsman,” Scorpius nodded toward her. She is American and working with the ministry as some sort of ambassador for international relations. Harry asked Al and Dom to introduce her to a few of the younger crowd. Although, I don’t think this is what he had in mind,” he gestured toward James and Samara..." After the first sentence there she be a punctuation mark before She is. It's a very minor thing, though, and it doesn't affect the flow of the story, since the sentence before was past tense while this is present tense.

Wow. Attacking Rose during a party hosted by all of her cousins, especially when there are a large group of Auror trainees there (plus friends and family that would undoubtedly come to her aid) is a very rash thing to do. I'm not convinced that it's a one-time thing, like Rose tries to tell herself. Since that was the event that sparked her PTSD/anxiety, I'm starting to wonder if it was the same person that attacked her before.

I wonder if there's something subconscious about Scorpius being the only one that can calm Rose down; if she secretly likes him, and yet they're comfortable enough around him to stand topless with him while he's also topless. Albus walking in (conveniently also topless) makes it sound as ridiculous as Rose thinks it must look. The conclusion that he jumps to is entirely reasonable.

I really enjoyed this chapter, and I'm curious to see if the person that tried to abduct/kidnap/assault Rose will try again, and what his motive is.

~Olivia

Author's Response: Wow. Olivia - this review. It's just. Thanks so much.

Yes. Rose is suffering from debilitating panic attacks as a result of not properly dealing with the trauma from her kidnapping. While she is trying to convince herself that it doesn't rule her life (you're right - she goes on like nothing's wrong), she really has been living in a dark place for the past two years.

Aaah! - so glad the Hermione came through! It is tough to write a character who *doesn't* think she is like her parents, but has a lot more of them inside of her than she thinks. You made me smile! :)

Haha - Wolfram is awesome. He and Molly are suited for each other.

Ooo - thanks for catching that - I'll fix it right up!

Yeah - that dude was pretty bold to think he could get away with grabbing Rose right in front of basically the entire Wotters and Auror trainee class - huh?

There is a bit to the whole Rose/Scorp dynamic - there will be more on that later, but they do have a deep connection. I can't wait for you to read it and let me know what you think. Yeah, it is a reasonable conclusion for Albus to make - but he isn't always reasonable where Rose is concerned.

I won't say any more about someone trying to get to Rose again... you'll just have to see!

Thanks Olivia!

♥ Beth


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Review #5, by UnluckyStar57 Bitter: Scorpius POV

19th October 2014:
Ahah! October BvB again! This review is brought to you in part by my awesome procrastination skills and my wish to learn more of Rose and Scorpius's story. :)

Oh. Wow. Albus and Harry were really going at it for a minute there. I was pretty shocked that Harry would choose to call Al out on his misbehavior and engage him in a duel in front of the entire Auror program. That sort of goes against Harry's whole "Mr. Nice Guy Peaceful Auror" persona with which he runs the department, but then again, parent-child relationships are always tough to balance, especially in the workplace. Thank Merlin for Scorpius hopping in with his peacemaking skills!

Oh yeah, and Al seems like he's just a little bit of a nuisance sometimes, what with all of his teasing and carrying on. But deep down, he just wants to prove himself to Harry, so maybe he purposefully acts out sometimes, to get some sort of reaction out of Harry? I don't know... But I love how complex your characters are! I haven't seen Al much in this, but he definitely has his own demons, just like Rose and Scorpius do.

A few typo-esque things that I caught:

"...although mildly irritated at Al for distracting me during the morning session, I just can't bring myself to be..."~Because this story is written in past tense, I think that the "can't" in this sentence should be "couldn't."

"Impedimentia!"~I think the spell is actually "Impedimenta."

Both are very minor things, so you don't have to worry about editing them if you don't want to. :)

One thing with the plot that concerned me a little was the speed of Harry and Al's reconciliation. There have been bad feelings under the surface for so many years, and they're just going to kiss and make up?! I refuse to think that this is the case. I think that it might be a reconciliation, but only on the surface--after all, this is from Scorpius's PoV, and he isn't exactly a mind reader. I'm thinking that tensions between the two green-eyed Potters will explode in a later chapter. The only reason that I bring this up is because the reconciliation was just. So. Quick! But now that I think about it, I'm sure that there will be more arguments to come. Ignore my waffling. :)

Uh oh, is Scorpius going to tell Rose the truth, or is he just going to beat around the bush some more? I'm betting that it's the later option. ;)

'Til next time!

~UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Hi again!

Haha - I love procrastination - but I'll get to that later :)

You're not the first person to comment on Harry's quick temper. I think that it had been a long time coming between him and Al - and since they are both not the main characters in the story, so I wasn't sure how much time to put into their back stories. Harry, at this point is just really disappointed that HIS son is the one setting a bad example. He wants Al to be the best - that Harry *knows* he can be, but he seems to fall short and get a bit sloppy. I am thinking about how to handle this differently, but I really wanted the two to face off so Harry could tell Al that he's really a better version of himself.

They did make up pretty quickly, huh? Again, I wasn't sure how to pace this because I didn't want to spend too much time on a side story - hmmm, I'll have to think about that. You're not waffling - I really don't have another argument between the green-eyes, but I do mention that Harry takes some steps to show trust in his son, if that helps :)

Thanks for finding those - I'll definitely fix them. The validators are gonna hate me - haha!

Scorpius and Rose well... you'll just have to read to find out!

Thanks again - so, so much!

♥ Beth


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Review #6, by UnluckyStar57 Besotted: Rose POV

19th October 2014:
I'm back for the October BvB Review Battle! :D

Whoa. There is a LOT of stuff going on in this chapter. A LOT. Rose revealing secrets? Check. Delving into their past Hogwarts selves? Check. Evil guy who got mentioned a few times but is now one of the nastiest characters I've read recently? Check, check, and check.

Stannous. I mean, I don't want to say he's stupid because he invented his own variant of the Cruciatus curse. He's obviously a bad guy with brains, and that is really terrifying. From the little bit of information that Rose gives us at the beginning of the chapter, I can tell that he is a force of evil that may rival Voldemort in terms of nastiness. He's had a lasting impact on Rose, too, which is awful. I can't stand to see her hating the scars that he gave her, because that just makes her think more about what he did to her. I wish that there was some way she could see them as her own battle scars of survival and bravery--but maybe there isn't any good way to see them, since she's been through such an ordeal because of them.

And Scorpius is just letting ALL of his problems out. The bitterness that he felt toward Draco in previous chapters is unparalleled by the hatred that he projects to Rose. If Draco was really that bad, I pity Astoria. :( The revelation that Scorpius slept around at Hogwarts was a surprising one--I really didn't think he would, but it does make sense. It's just gross and awful that Rose had to catch him in the act. :/

One thing I was a bit confused about (and this is probably just my own silliness): Was that Scorpius's way of confessing his love for Rose, and vice versa? It seemed like it, but they didn't really continue that whole conversation. Maybe they set it aside for later so that they could concentrate on forgetting about Scorpius's past for the time being... Love was never going to be easy for those two, anyway.

Another marvelous chapter! If I keep reviewing them for the BvB every month, I might finish in about... two years. :P I'll have to stop by again sometime, just for funsies. :D

~UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Hi there!

Wow. Thanks so much for this awesome review. I'm just floored by how thorough you are.

So - YES, Stannous is pretty much pure evil. There will be much, much more on that later on in the story. I'm glad that you picked up on the fact that he could rival Voldemort, because I wanted a character of that magnitude to be around to terrorize the next gen kids. (I just realized that made ME sound pretty evil - haha or should I say mwah-ha-ha!).

Yes! I want Rose to see the scars as a reason as her ability to survive and give her strength and power! She's just not in that place quite yet. She might need some help to get there... enter completely hunky yet slightly damaged tall, blond, Scorpius!

Draco wasn't bad, per se... he was just fighting his own demons from the war. Essentially cut off from wizarding society and ostracized by both the purebloods and Harry's crew had a rough effect on him. He loved his son, but was too caught up in his own depression to show it. The result was a barren wasteland of a home for Scorpius. He was much closer to his Mum, but still felt a need for friends. Aand all of this is from Scorpius's POV, so were seeing his take on things - from his 15-year old perspective.

I really struggled with having Scorpius sleep around at Hogwarts. On one hand, I think it makes the love he had for Rose less pure - he couldn't wait for the right girl to come to her senses. But, in the end, I decided that having that wedge between them would hold them off from getting together at Hogwarts - so that they were a bit older and more mature when they finally decide they want to be together. I hope that makes sense :)

My intent was to not have them confess any REAL feelings just yet, but to maybe open the door to the possibility that they were still interested in each other. I'm sorry if it came off as confusing, but I really appreciate the honest feedback. I'm slowly editing this story and all of this cc is really helpful :)

Ooo - please stop by anytime. I ♥ your reviews!

Beth


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Review #7, by Lostmyheart Bereft: Scorpius POV

19th October 2014:
BETH. YOU MADE ME CRY.

I sat here, crying, because of the scene with Rose and Albus comming in, hugging him. I absolutely LOVE Rose, YOUR Rose. She is so loving, caring and incredibly sincere. I can't believe she did all that for Scorp, and to cry because of his loss. She truly loves him, and to feel someone's pain that much, it only means that you're a good person.

Then, just seconds after you made me cry, you made me laugh. I love that uncle of his. I laughed out loud, I mean come on! "magic blokes" and then Ron and Harry coming in, Ron being all furious and a complete idiot. I literally raised my arms saying "SERIOUSLY RON?!" and then I was like, "oh god I'm glad I'm alone right now".

This chapter was seriously a roller coaster to me. I cried, I laughed, I almost cried again, then I laughed. It reminds me of that scene in Friends where Joey says "smile, frown, smile, frown." That exactly how I would look like if anyone saw me reading this chapter :b

Apparate cadabra stuff. I lost it.

Beth, you're brilliant. I Love your humor! And your talent to break hearts.

I will continue this story. I WILL.

- Avi

Author's Response: Oh no! I'm sorry to make you cry!

I'm so happy that you love my version of Rose. I know that it's a bit different from what others view her to be. She's mostly portrayed as sarcastic and rough like Ron, but brilliant and brave like Hermione. I actually started the idea for this story by asking - what if Rose weren't a combination of her parents?

I had a lot of fun writing Uncle Phil and Ron in this chapter.

OMG - I LOVE Friends! I totally know the episode you're talking about - haha!

Aww - now you're making ME cry!

Thanks so much Avi!

♥ Beth


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Review #8, by Lostmyheart Blown Away: Scorpius POV

19th October 2014:
What...

Seriously Beth. That chapter title, you meant it! They were literally blown away.
I'm just... Poor Scorpius, and I can't figure out whether or not this was an accident or a murder. Because,if it's a murder, then you have an incredibly twisted plot! With all of Rose's problems and now Scorpius'.

Honestly, I can't believe I haven't read more than two chapters, and now this, the third. Because I remember reading more, but apparently not. This story is actually on my reading list :)

Scorpius seems like a really nice, young man. He was so sweet when he thought of Rose, how he was in awe of the fact that they were, well, under dressed in a room together. To me it showed that he cared more about her, than her just being someone he can score. He actually fancies her, and I've always liked that whenever I read stories where Albus and Scorpius are best friends.

What struck me the most about Draco, is that Scorpius thought of the rumors back at Hogwarts, the rumors about his father calling people without magical bloodlines for mudbloods. I'm not sure if you intended it that way, but that meant that Draco never used that word within the walls of their home, when Scorpius grew up. So Draco never continued his father's way of raising his child, and I really like that. I've always imagined that the war had a good impact on Draco, where he learned how wrong they had been and then tried to avoid becoming like his father.

That kid, Mason, I like him! So sweet, with the M&M. Poor child, but then again, it surprises me that the Malfoy's have muggle neighbors. A trait Scorpius without a doubt inherited from his father - using people to get what he wants. He used Mason to get back at his father. You did this brilliantly, despite Scorpius being to different from his father, he is still having some of the Malfoy traits.

I really enjoyed reading this chapter! And I can't wait to read the next. Poor Scorpius...

- Avi

Author's Response: Hey Avi,

So glad you're enjoying this story - and I'm SO glad we did a review swap, your reviews are awesome. So - you are a very intuitive reader and I don't want to give too much away, so I'll just leave it at that.

Scorpius is a really good guy - and he is completely in love with Rose - the two of them just don't see it yet. I didn't want to just throw them together at the beginning of the story - because I didn't want to write a story where they are on-again, off-again, but I also wanted their relationship to mean a bit more, so they're taking it slow for now...

Scorp, Al, Rose and Selenia are best friends - mostly banded by the fact that they were all sorted into Ravenclaw. As far as Scorpius and Draco's relationship... well, that was sort of rocky. Mostly because Draco didn't want his past to rub off on his son, but also because he was so damaged by the effects of the war that he had his own issues to deal with. I wish there was a happier ending for him and Astoria, but they can live on a bit in Scorpius.

Mason is the annoying kid in the neighborhood, and yep Scorpius is totally using him - although I didn't originally intend it to be because Scorpius has a bit of Draco in him - but I'll take the compliment - haha ;) And Scorpius does have a few other Malfoy traits.

Thanks again Avi!

♥ Beth


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Review #9, by MargaretLane Bedlam: Scorpius and Rose POV

16th October 2014:
O.K., I'm finally getting around to this. Have gone to read SO many times.

You are really good at making it clear whose point of view you're writing from. It's hard switching between points of view in first person, but you do it really well. I only just noticed that now, which is a good sign, as it means I haven't been confused.

And you are STILL keeping us in suspense as to where Rose is, except that she's not with her parents. Oooh, ominous. At least she seems to be with somebody sympathetic, which is a good sign, but whether it's somewhere she'd be safe if attacked is still in question.

Harry's is good. If any home is likely to be protected, it's his.

One thing I've noticed here is that there are a few places where contractions might be useful. I think it'd be more natural for Harry to say, "does anybody know you're here?" than "does anybody know you are here?" for example. And even more so, when Al says "you are being completely unreasonable." I'm being very nit-picky here, but the "are" sort of slows down the sentence and makes him sound less irritated than he might otherwise.

Yi-i-ikes, that is the very LAST thing I expected. I think I pretty much had it in my head that the villain (I can NEVER remember how to spell his name) was working from revenge in some way or another. I kind of assumed he had something against Harry, Ron or Hermione and was punishing them by harming somebody they loved. I thought maybe he blamed one of them for the death or imprisonment of somebody he cared about - a parent, maybe - and was punishing them by imprisoning somebody they loved. I only considered that a possibility, but at any rate, I assumed it had something to do with revenge on them or at least was connected to the past, not to a prophecy.

And now I can't wait to hear what the prophecy is about. I'm guessing Rose is destined to something and the villain wants to prevent her from doing it.

I find it interesting how differently next gen. characters can be portrayed. Al's need to play the hero here is so much in contrast to my Albus's desire for a quiet life. Though, of course, my Al is much younger, but I don't think he'd ever react quite like that. The other way around - Rose needing to act the hero for Albus would be way more likely.

Author's Response: Hi MargaretLane,

Aww, thanks so much for this and ALL your reviews. It really lifts my sprirts when I see them ♥

I cannot tell you how relieved I am that you mentioned my POV. That is something that I really worry about. Actually, I tried really, really hard to write this story solely from Rose's POV, but I needed too much from Scorpius's perspective, that I had to go back and re-do several chapters.

Harry was Rose's obvious choice. Although her real intentions were to beg him to lift the restrictions. She was just trying to convince herself that running away wasn't so bad.

Yikes - I've made a concerted effort to improve my contractions, mainly because of your wonderful feedback. But you're right (see what I did there?) both of those places would sound better with the contractions.

Haha - the villain is Stannous (the Latin name for tin - from the Periodic Table). Ooo - I'm so glad I caught you off guard with the prophecy. Expect more next chapter. Much, MUCH more - (insert evil laugh).

Good guess, but... keep guessing!

I totally know what you mean about next gen characters! This site has opened up SO many avenues as to how the next gen plays out - it really blows my mind to see the variations of romantic pairings and character traits. I agree with your fic - Rose is definitely the dominant of that relationship.

Thanks again!

Beth


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Review #10, by CambAngst Bedlam: Scorpius and Rose POV

15th October 2014:
Hi, Beth! I'm afraid I couldn't be the first reviewer this time, but top 3 isn't so bad. ;)

First off, I'm going to allow myself a small pat on the back for guessing right about Rose's destination. **pat, pat** I'm also going to breathe a small sigh of relief that it wasn't someplace like Stannous's oceanside condo. I don't think I could have handled that revelation.

I see it didn't take Hermione long at all to piece things together from Scorpius's question. Interesting that Ron was the one to make the connection and figure out where Rose went. It makes an odd kind of sense. Ron obviously has a lot of experience dealing with the women in his family.

"I really need to see if she's all right," I didn't even try to hide the tears brewing in my eyes. "If she wants me to leave, I will, but I... have to see for myself." -- The boy is head over heels, isn't he? At the moment it's debatable whether he's deeper in love or in trouble, but I'm guessing that love will soon win out.

If you have to flee your own personal Azkaban, wouldn't it be best to go to the Head Auror's house? -- Well, best and also safest. Even when she's being irrational to a fault, Rose seems to make good choices. She's solid like that.

I know I've given you a spot of grief about Harry in some of your earlier chapters, but in this one I thought he was pitch perfect. He's fatherly, but not to the extent where it feels smothering. I'm confident Ron would have smothered Rose. Harry seems no less caring, but he's also understanding. He's ready to be forthcoming with her, even though he knows that what he's going to reveal will be difficult for Rose. It's plain that he doesn't love her any less, but he's treating her like an adult. Honestly, the Weasley family could use more of that.

Looks of relief poured over my friends and family, but I was still too angry to even acknowledge them. -- Yep, she's a Weasley.

From there on out, the conversation degrades into a melee. I loved the way you wrote the different sides of the argument. I do sort of wish that you hadn't written it as such a clean-cut male-female disagreement (Dominique aside), but I could see how the points of view were lining up. Ginny seemed ready to take on everyone (Ron, Albus and to a lesser extent Harry) on Rose's behalf.

Mum was yelling at Dad, Dad was yelling at Aunt Ginny, who was yelling at Al. Selenia was trying to catch her breath. Dom was arguing with Fred and James, who were getting more demanding by the second. Jax was trying to calm down his girlfriend. -- Marvelous. It's a full-blown Weasley family throwdown. The hexes were definitely about to fly before Harry intervened.

Ooh, another cliff-hanger. Something is definitely up. So, if I'm right about Stannous being tied into the Lestranges somehow, I'm bubbling over with speculation about what this prophecy is going to say. I'm guessing there will be some parallel drawn between the mother and the daughter. Perhaps Rose is the one destined to rid the world of the scourge of the Lestranges? My mind is spinning at an alarming rate here.

No typos in this chapter! Excellent job. Can't wait for the next one!

Author's Response: Hey Dan!

Yes. You get a pat on the back for that. Nice job (totally not patronizing you or anything - haha). I seriously can NOT read your reviews while at work, because outbursts of laughter are too hard to explain, especially when I'm blurting out words like "oceanside condo..."

Yeah, Hermione is a quick one - and Ron. Well, I'm not exactly one of those writers who has an entire vault dedicated to each character's motivation and back story - unless you count all of the thoughts that bounce around in my head.. BUT in my version of events, Ron is well, not very good with fully understanding his daughter, or effectively portraying his emotions to her. I think it's because he just wants to protect her so much, his first inclination is to conjure a giant bubble around her and follow behind it forever. That being said, he KNOWS that Harry will always have Rose's best interest and so understands that she feels less oppressed by him. However, that doesn't mean he's not going to stand up to Harry, should the occasion arise...

As for Scorpius, he's just a lost soul at this point. He *can't* have anything happen to Rose. It puts a bit of a blinder on him.

Rose's reason for going to Harry's house was more to plead her case, than a carefully thought out plan. She's just justifying it to herself.

*Exhales giant sigh of relief* You approve of Harry! It's easy for him to be a bit more understanding, as Rose isn't his daughter and he *does* love her so much, but is at least willing to see the big picture. I think Harry knows that Rose could, being of legal age, choose to say - "Forget all of this" (trying to keep this 12+) "I'm gonna take off on my own - see-ya!"

I'm glad the giant all-around argument came off alright. That was not easy to write. I actually completely forgot a character and had to go back and put in some more actions/dialogue to compensate. I wasn't really intending to make it sound like it was men vs. women, it just seemed that way to Rose. I should look at that part again.

So... about Stannous. You're right, but not right. I know that makes no sense. BUT much will be revealed in the next chapter and I hope, hope, *hope* that you will be less disappointed and more surprised and shouting at the computer screen, or whatever. ♥

Thanks again Dan, for everything!

Beth


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Review #11, by lindslo2012 Breakdown: Rose POV

15th October 2014:
OH.
MY.
GOSH.
This was such an amazing and intense chapter, Beth! I loved how you first started with her therapy session. Everything she says is so... well, real to what relationships are like in the beginning stage! I really liked her therapist. She seemed very understanding and knowing, unlike someone would be who thought this young girl talking about sex was absurd. But that's a real thing girls worry about. Am I good enough? Does he not really want me? I have been with my husband since we were fourteen (we are still young but have been together quite awhile now) but I know girls go through this time. And I did too. Lol. The way you called the trauma stuff was awesome. I myself am in the healthcare field as an aid and I was reading all that very carefully. You wrote exactly how I would expect a hospital like St. Mungo's would act in a situation such as this. Good job girl! And go Rose, she's the bomb... she learned how to find out if the patient's insides were splinched and she solved it. And... she made love to Scorpius! Beth, you wrote this whole chapter well, and I can't wait to read more! Come back and re-request because I bet it only gets better from here!!!

-Lindsey

Author's Response: Hi Lindsey.

Wow - this review was so awesome - thank so much. I have also been with my husband for a really long time, so I'm glad that it came off alright as being realistic.

And I'm really, really glad that the trauma scene worked. I take that as a huge compliment, coming from someone who works in the field. Whew, that is a huge weight off my chest.

I'm just so excited that you like this story so much! I'm going to re-request right now!

Thanks Lindsey - ♥

Beth


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Review #12, by Dianainga Bedlam: Scorpius and Rose POV

14th October 2014:
Oh...this is getting GREAT! I cannot wait for the next chapter. I really love the relationships shown in this argument...Ginny and Ron.Al and Selena...Dom and everyone. And, my heart goes out to Scorpius. Love this story!

Author's Response: Hey there!

So glad to see you back ♥ Sorry it took me so long to get to this, but I wanted to say how much I appreciate the review. The next chapter is going to be a biggie!

Thanks! Beth


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Review #13, by k1187700 Bedlam: Scorpius and Rose POV

14th October 2014:
Yay! Another chapter up! God this one really showed how much tension was up in the air huh?

So we're finally going to find out what the big mystery is? Or is Harry only going to tell a half truth so as not to scare everyone? I need to know how Rose and Scorpius react to this, him knowing the entire time and keeping it from her even though it was about her! (But maybe it would just be me who'd be mad, I really hate being left in the dark about important things)
And Al and Selinia? I like it I won't lie, Selenia having a backbone on this front.

I don't know why but I've had this feeling that this story is going to mirror a tv show I found called the following (just a little, obviously its very different in content) but in the following it's about this huge cult, that's been going on for so long people have become sherifs in towns and made good friends with the main guy and then betray him. There are actually very little parallels between these stories but I keep thinking any moment now some of the kind of side characters (like James' girlfriend and Astinine) are going to turn out to be working for the bad guy the whole time.

Also, I wanted to say that I was touched that you replied to my review and remembered that I had reviewed your story earlier on. That was very kind of you.

And by the way congratulations on winning an award! You deserve it! This story is excellent!

Author's Response: Hey there,

Wow - you are FAST - this chapter just went up about an hour before your review. ♥

I was really worried about writing the scene with all the tension, I'm so glad it came off alright. The prophecy is the crux of the mystery and no, you won't have to wait long to find out the specifics :)

Ooo - The Following - I've watched a few episodes and it is really good. (Although I started writing this about a year before I saw any of that), but I know what you mean about the cult - I don't wanna say to much, but it isn't exactly like that, however I can see some parallels! All I can say now is WOW - I'm so glad you're into this story.

Thanks - I was so, so, so excited about the Dobby Award.

I reply to all my reviews - and I'm trying harder to get to them sooner.

Thanks again!

♥ Beth



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Review #14, by GingeredTea Bent: Rose POV

7th October 2014:
So I was wondering form last chapter whether other's know about this experience Rose had? Or is she trying to not only cover up her reaction but it's occurrence as well?

You played the party scene well, and you managed to introduce Scorpius with a casual ease that felt perfect. Their laughter over their made up conversations had me giggling a few times too. I KNEW something bad was going to happen when she stood up to get new drinks. I just knew it. Jerk, that's all I have to say.

---Why don’t we just invite Nana Molly and Grandad here and call it Christmas.--- Oh Merlin this had me laughing!

Then the ending. You took me from laughing to near tears - happy and sad all mixed together.

This was a great chapter! I can't wait to read another! :D Sorry for the delay. I must have simply lost track because I won't start a new review swap until I believe I have them all complete. :)

Author's Response: Hi there!

Gosh - thanks for this review - it has me all warm and fuzzy. I love it when a reader picks up on all my clues and everything I try to jam into a chapter! ♥

As for what happened to Rose... everyone knows that she was kidnapped for six days, but they don't know what happened to her when she was being held captive. Don't worry, it is revealed fairly early on, but I wanted to clear up that, at this point, they only know that she was kidnapped and returned.

Yeah, that dude was a creep, huh? Good think Scorp and her family were there.

Thanks again for this awesome review!

Beth


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Review #15, by lindslo2012 Breakthrough: Scorpius POV

7th October 2014:
Hey there Beth,
I am SO sorry for the wait! I haven't had internet, moved, and ect but here I am! And I see you have lots more chapters for me to review, woohoo! :)

So I am really starting to see Scorp's love for Rose. He is calm, collected, but extremely protective over her. This was a horrible thing that happened to her and he only wants to be there for her.
I hope that this chapter means that they are starting to really lead toward the investigation now. Maybe they will finally figure it all out so it won't happen again. And if it does I bet Scorp will be there to protect her. I love your next gen story Beth! I can't wait to read more!!!

-Lindsey

Author's Response: Lindsey!

I missed you! I hope all is well. No worries about the review - I can wait forever for one of your awesome reviews ♥

Yeah, the investigation is starting to pick up. And I was so excited to see that you can feel how Scorpius loves Rose. He doesn't always maintain his cool, but he is good at rallying a group to focus on a task. He wants to get to the bottom of this and sometimes Al's temper gets the best of him.

I'm off to re-request again. Thanks so much Lindsey!

Beth


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Review #16, by Paddlewaddle Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

6th October 2014:
Things are coming to a head as we find out more about Stannous (as we did in the last chapter). Still trying to piece together in my head some theories about what exactly went on with the Department of Mysteries and WHY Rose is his target - but all in due time!

For a moment in the last paragraph of the sentence I almost had chills runnign down me thinking that it was Stannous who was at her parents house waiting for her, and not Scorpius (or at least someone she trusted) conforting her after she threw up. Thankfully its not the case and I really honesly do love this unparalleled trust they have for each other. A lot of the fics I read have trouble portraying this part of their relationship (at least beyond the initial 'chase') but this fic does it perfectly - the kind of relationship that's passionate, firey but also peaceful, trusting and loving.

Anyway I can't wait for the next few chapter as things are slowly being revealed!

Author's Response: Hi paddlewaddle,

So sorry I took a long time to get to this :(

Ooo! You picked up on the Department of Mysteries thing - very observant! Don't worry, much will be revealed soon.

Oh - that would've been really creepy to have Stannous there. *shudders*

Gah! You give me such feels because you really *get* the relationship I'm trying to portray between Rose and Scorpius. It is truly deeper than just a passionate love or best friends who finish each other's sentences. They are connected to each other - in so many ways.

Next chapter is in the queue! I can't wait to hear what you think!

♥ Beth


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Review #17, by UnluckyStar57 Bereft: Scorpius POV

5th October 2014:
Oh my. I really do love this story, so when I get a chance to review it, I jump on it. :)

For the October BvB Review Battle, I will review this chapter full of flashbacks. :D

Okay, so I'm in awe of your ability to write detailed flashbacks. I love how you transport the reader (me!) right into the past to see how fifteen-year-old Scorpius is coping with the utter disaster that is his life. Poor thing. :/ I think it's really interesting that you chose to make Daphne forsake her Wizarding heritage and live like a Muggle, but it definitely makes sense after all that happened during the war. I wonder what the situation was that drove her away...

Oh my gosh, Rose and Albus are the BEST. I like that Rose is so fiery and passionate about her friendship with Scorpius, even when she's facing off with Ron about it. I do think that Ron is being overtly rude about the whole thing--what did he think the two would get up to, especially with Albus watching?! Silly Ron...

And I like how Rose becomes Scorpius's rock through all of the bad times. It makes their scene in the beginning, with him consoling her, just that much more significant. I can't wait to see where this whole thing goes!

Drunk!Scorpius should be interesting... Hmmm... It's super interesting how he still seems to think of his father in sarcastic terms--"Death Eater Dad." Gosh, that's just awful, but he seems to still really resent that part of Draco's past.

Brilliant job with all of the flashbacks! I really enjoyed them. :)

~Mallory/UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Hiya Mallory!

Gosh - this review is so awesome - thanks! I'm glad you like my story and I hope you continue to come back ♥

Rose is not like her parents. She has this compassion inside her and her bravery stems from defending/aiding those who cannot help themselves. But because she is not a fighter like the golden trio, she sees this as a fault instead.

I also wanted to show that Rose and Scorpius are connected on a deeper level - a level they don't even know or understand just yet... foreshadowing maybe?

Yeah, Draco wasn't the best father. He was a bit to wrapped up in his own failures - so he just sort of left the parenting bit to Astoria.

Haha - I love this overprotective Ron. He just doesn't know what to do with a teenage daughter, so he flies off the handle. The situation isn't helped by the fact that Scorpius is a Malfoy.

Thanks again, Mallory!

Beth


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Review #18, by Roisin Broken: Rose POV

4th October 2014:
Hello!

Oh man, I love this story already. There's so much amazing stuff going on, I don't even know where to start.

The "Get up, wash, get dressed, class, rounds, study" motif was REALLY well done, I just loved how you did that. And the way you use formatting to increase the depth of emphasis--from normal, to italics, to bold italics. It's really effective!

And I just have to commend you on the sensitivity with which you handled the more difficult aspects of this story. I think it's easy, when trying to be sensitive, to kind of euphemize the stuff getting addressed. Here, you did better by not shying away, and rather giving an unflinching picture of anxiety disorders, and the realities of surviving a traumatic event. The reason it is tactful is because it is accurate, which I've decided is the single most important part about portraying a difficult issue.

A kind of rambling aside: I once took a class on the AIDS epidemic, and several people in the class were drawn to the subject because they themselves had personal experiences with it (either being HIV+, or having lost someone). We watched several films, which were all VERY upsetting, and at one point, my teacher warned us that the documentary we were going to watch next was particularly affecting--because it was such an intimate look at one person's harrowing experience. As it turned out, that film (Silverlake Life) was the one that people found the least upsetting, because it most accurately spoke to people's real experiences. Other films could even be offensive, because people who didn't actually have personal experience were kind of imagining what it would be like. Additionally, that film ended up having the most universal resonance in the class, despite its subject matter being so specific. Anyone who had ever been touched by illness or patienthood could relate to the issues in the film.

Anyway, the point I'm trying to make with that is that unflinching, accurate, empathetic depictions of sensitive topics are effective because they don't reduce or trivialize those issues for people who might have experienced them, and also can resonate more broadly with people whose experiences might not be the same, because certain feelings have more broad applications.

RAMBLE RAMBLE RAMBLE. Anyway, I loved this chapter!

On to the next!

(PS, I really liked the bit about the Sorting Hat hiding a bottle of whiskey!!!)

Author's Response: Hello Roisin!

Wow. Thanks so much for this. I was so relieved that you found my portrayal of the panic attack accurate and handled well. That was really, really important to me.

Truth be told, I *haven't* experienced a panic attack of this magnitude, (also was never kidnapped and held captive by a dark wizard - lol) but I've had enough experiences with - er - stuff, to know what you are saying. Whenever I read a story that's about something I've experienced and it's handled poorly, I can't even review it. :( - So I guess that is MY ramble aaannd I'm done now!

Another challenge that I *hopefully* conveyed throughout this story is that recovery is slow and not linear. You don't get better as soon as you get a boyfriend, or have a happy day or win a prize (you get the idea). I hope that comes through as well :)

So excited you like this story!!

♥ Beth


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Review #19, by GingeredTea Broken: Rose POV

3rd October 2014:
I loved this entrance for its subtlety, darkness, and intimacy. You take what I am assuming was a sexual assault and express it brokenly through the character's fractured perspective. That blame, so ingrained that it you feel it through her expressions but it doesn't weigh that much in her head - as if it is just a cold terrible fact now about herself rather than something up for debate.

I also love how instead of a classic trigger you chose a much more...I want to use the word intimate again but I know there is a better word to describe what I mean. You choose this feeling of grogginess, before she really knows what to do or what will happen, as her trigger. You do it amazingly well with a sophistication I don't often encounter in the fan fiction community.

Thank you for the fantastic swap. I hope we can do many more in the future as I am definitely in love with this story! :D

Author's Response: Hello again!

Thank you so much for giving this story a chance! I actually was not intending to imply sexual assault, but I was trying to be mysterious about what trauma Rose has endured to cause the panic attacks. A large bit of it gets revealed fairly early on (maybe chapter 5?)

Wow. Sophistication! Thanks so much! I'm just so excited you think the story is a worthwhile read ♥

Beth


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Review #20, by LightLeviosa5443 Bombs and Bonds: Scorpius and Rose POV

3rd October 2014:
Hey Hon,

Here for the BvB!
As usual you did a wonderfully amazing job with this chapter! I loved the emotions that went through the entire thing! You are so great at putting the reader inside the story and making them feel everything and feel like they're in that moment. It's wonderful to experience as you're reading, especially with as great of a story as this!

Okay, so this chapter was just like a million levels of heart break and amazing and just what. I mean, I don't even know where to focus in. First of all, the first part of the chapter is all AGH WHATS HAPPENING, and everyone is all silent and serious and ohmigosh it's just angst and nerves.

Like I seriously bit my nails. AND THEY TOOK ME LIKE THREE HOURS SO THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING BECAUSE I'M NORMALLY REALLY CAREFUL WITH MY NAILS. anyway. The whole time I was just panicking and worrying and the fact that Ron was pale and Harry was trying to keep his cool means that something was so not okay and that's just terrifying! AND MAYBE I MISSED IT BUT YOU TOTALLY KEPT US IN THE DARK ABOUT IT, TOO.

LIKE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME.

And then the second part. Rose's POV. Ugh. Ugh. Are you trying to rip my heart out or something?! Just, everything about this section was like a million levels of just. ugh. ugh. UGH BETH. I'm in love with Rose and Hermione's relationship. Just the way they're interacting, the pain Hermione was going through. The way you described everything. I think my heart broke a million times by the time Ron and Scorpius burst in.

Which, by the way, was an amazing job at breaking the scene. And the tension of Scorpius. The (sort of) camaraderie that we see between Scorp and Ron, when Ron is like YEAH COOK FOR US. And then the tension that's just emanating from Scorpius and Rose is all excuse me, I know you're lying. And then of course she can't even ask him because HELLO. RON NEEDS TO EAT.

It was just a wonderful chapter and I'm running out of words to say how much I liked it. I mean, it really was just an outstanding chapter. I'm anxious to keep reading and I can't wait to see where the rest of the story is going. I mean, i already kind of know because of the outline. But I can't wait to see it in writing. I'm rambling. I loved it.

Love you (and your writing) times a billion,
xoxo Sarah ♥

Author's Response: Hi Sarah,

A legitimate *nail-biter?!* Wow. What a fantastic compliment. Fair warning - it's gonna get a bit hairy from here - haha!

I'm so glad the emotion came through in the first part. I didn't want to reveal too much at this point. It's coming soon, but not just yet.

Yay! Rose and Hermione finally talked. That was a really big deal - and it also worked as a nice set up for what's to come - dun-dun-dunh!

RON NEEDS TO EAT. Omg - this is the BEST summary ever for the ending of this chapter. I'm relieved that the ending didn't come off as a quick, cut to the chase, because I was worried that it seemed to short. Whew! Thanks for that. Thanks for this and ALL of your awesomeness!

♥ Beth


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Review #21, by k1187700 Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

1st October 2014:
AH! I can't believe this chapter was up so fast! Great chapter! I would feel the same way as Rose about being cooped up and it goes a lot to showing that although she is moving on, it's still going to haunt her. Most story's blast past that like, once you're doing okay, you've forgotten the incidence but it still creeps up on you! I do like in how you interpret all the old characters too. Most the time on this site Harry, Ron and Hermione become vague parental figures but you've stayed true to how they seem in JK's books and added more to their story, not just ignored the years that have meant to have passed. But you still haven't even dropped a hint about what the mystery is. Please update just as fast again! I love this story! I love Rose and Scorpius together! I love how you've incorporated all their relationships! It's a really good story! You've written it so well, it will kill me if I don't find out how it ends!

Author's Response: Hiya!

I was so excited to see you back! It gives me such a thrill to know that you are enjoying the story - really, I'm giddy right now. I'm glad that it came across that Rose needs a bit more freedom - that's all I'm gonna say on that part right now.

I also *loved* that you noticed my details with the trio. I figured they would play a big part in their kids' lives and I know what you mean about how they are generally portrayed as background characters.

I definitely intend to finish this story - the next ten chapters or so are roughed out and I have an outline all the way to the end. I can't update for a week or so because I've been nominated for a Dobby (squee!) and the rules state that there can be no edits until voting is over. But once it is - I'll be right back to it!

Thanks again for reviewing!

Beth


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Review #22, by CambAngst Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

1st October 2014:
Hi, Beth!

Ooh, a cliffhanger! Who is the mysterious person in the house where Rose arrived? Obviously it's somebody who's familiar with her problems. Very curious.

I was wondering whether something like this might happen, although I was thinking Scorpius was more likely to go stir-crazy than Rose. I guess it's actually an expected part of her recovery. Now that she's had a little taste of what life could be like, it must be hard to be smothered in the darkness of Grimmauld Place because of Stannous. I know I'd find that horrible. He's torturing her in a completely different way, not even needing to be present.

Honestly, I was a fan of Rose's central idea. She really could use to brush up on her defensive magic in a practical setting. Granted, she's probably rushing into things, but progress has to start somewhere. Trying to parlay that idea into a way to be outside, however, was a bit childish on her part. She should understand as well as anyone that Stannous has some way to get to her that the Aurors don't know how to counteract, short of placing her under unbreakable magical protection. All in all, it seems like both sides were being kind of ridiculous. Given the strain she's under, I can see how Rose would have reacted poorly to what she would see as further coddling/imprisoning.

The group lost valuable time while trying to overcome their shock and figure out what to do. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt them. I really liked Scorpius's idea of going directly to Ron and Hermione. Aside from their house being as likely as anywhere for Rose to be, he's building some additional trust with Ron. Rose probably won't like it, but she's not really thinking straight at this point. I just hope Scorpius doesn't talk himself out of being honest with them before he can tell them what's happened.

So where has Rose actually gone? My random guess is Harry's house, and the person behind her is Ginny. But hey, I'm probably way far off. We shall see.

I noticed one thing of consequence while I was reading: "Don't say anything to alarm Nana Molly or Grandad, just act like you came for a quick visit and send me a patronus." -- This line comes from Scorpius, if I'm reading it right, so it doesn't sound right for him to refer to Molly and Arthur that way.

Otherwise, brilliant chapter! I enjoyed it thoroughly and I can't wait for you to spring your surprise on us!

Author's Response: Hi Dan!

So sorry for the cliffhanger - uh... actually I'm not, but since we are getting to the more action-packed part of the story, there *might* be one or two more - fair warning - haha!

I'm so excited that you noticed how this is a completely different kind of torture - that really comes out in the next couple of chapters. Rose just has to make her family/Auror department (really they are one in the same...) see this.

I think Rose's idea is a good one too! The Auror trainees are just privy to some *other* information that is scaring the pants off of them right now, so they are coming from a different point of view.

Yeah, the lot of them were completely taken aback by her sudden exit. It was so unlike mild, meek little Rose to just run off - another sign that she is on her way toward recovery.

As for your guess at Rose's location, you won't have to wait too long...

I never thought about Scorpius's names for Molly and Arthur - I think in my head, she (Molly) insisted that he refer to them in that way after spending so much time with the Potters. Arthur might not like it, but I think after Scorpius's parents passed away, she would have taken him in like one of her grandchildren.

Thanks again, Dan!

♥ Beth


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Review #23, by MargaretLane Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

1st October 2014:
I like the sound of this chapter. You indicated things were about to get intense in your reply to my last review and I enjoy a bit of intensity, though I'm not sure whether it's going to be emotional intensity or villain stalking people intensity. The former is my favourite, though the latter could be interesting too.

And I LOVE the summary to this chapter. I assume it means because she can't go out for fear of the villain rather than being a reference to her mental state, as I originally thought, but either is interesting.

I really like the way you go into detail about how much the restrictions are bothering her. So many stories end all stress once the character begins to confront their demons or the main pairing gets together, whereas in reality, problems aren't sorted so easily and being so restricted WOULD be extremely difficult. Especially as it seems to be dragging on for months on end. It may be minor compared with her post-traumatic stress and the risk of death, but the little things are still frustrating even when you have bigger problems.

Poor Wolfram Longbottom. He sounds a little like his dad, just from that little comment. Assuming he is his son. He could be a cousin or something too, I guess.

Hmm, I'm now intrigued as to what it is that Ruth has found out.

And I like the positive note in her letter. The whole comment about the faster her recovery will be reminds her that she will recover without being so positive as to make Rose feel guilty or inadequate if she doesn't progress as fast as she might.

She does seem to be doing better though. In a way, even her frustration and annoyance is a good sign, as her focus on the restrictions shows the other problems aren't demanding so much of her attention that she is unable to carry about the more petty problems.

And in practically the next LINE we get a real impression of how much better she is doing when she says she's now ready to experience life again, but can't. It may be unfair and really annoying, but I still think it's better than her not being up to experiencing life "outside her little cocoon." There are real indications she'll recover. Of course, that assumes she doesn't experience further trauma at the villain's hands that set her back. Even just seeing him or having reason to fear another immediate attack could easily set back her recovery.

And in the very next line, she considers the possibility of another attack.

And I like the little details like that Scorpius and Rose enjoy cooking whereas Albus and Selenia do the easiest options possible.

I think it is good for her to learn some extra defensive spells, just in case there aren't enough Auror around to protect her. However I really don't think it would be a good idea for her to remain and fight if it is possible for her to get away and I can easily see her doing so. She's not an Auror, she's at greater risk than other people as it appears it's her the villain is after and she has trauma issues that aren't going to be helped by being injured in battle. But I can easily see her not wanting to leave other people to fight when it is likely to be her presence that drew the villain in the first place.

Harry'd be a bit of a hypocrite to object to the underground teaching of Defence Against the Dark Arts, wouldn't he? But I guess this is different, as Rose has, or should have, adequate protection, whereas the Hogwarts students were not receiving adequate preparation in Harry's fifth year.

I doubt Rose would go anywhere unprotected. While she may not know the full story (and I am intrigued as to what it is she doesn't know), I think she knows enough to realise what a bad idea that'd be. But then on the other hand, she may just be frustrated enough to take a risk.

Stay with somebody who can protect you, Rose!

I'd be inclined to put a "pm" after the "seven o'clock" part, though it's not really necessary as the next line and the fact they are having dinner makes it clear it's the evening anyway.

I hope she is with Ron and Hermione.

Hmm, you've left it up in the air where she is even after she arrives. I'm intrigued. It could be her mum she's with, but I kind of doubt it. Harry, maybe. Although the bit about knowing how she is could indicate her mother, as Hermione would understand the trauma she's feeling.

Many of the people I'd consider aren't options, as we know Albus and Scorpius don't know where she is. Hmm.

I think the flow of this chapter is better than previous chapters, maybe because of the beta. I thought it read really well anyway, whatever the reason.

And yeah, that part I mentioned in the last chapter may well be a dialect thing. I've seen it like that in other stories too.

Author's Response: Hello there!

I was so excited to see you were the first to review the latest chapter :)

Hmmm - emotional intensity vs. stalking intensity - can it be a bit of both? I definitely have both lined up. Although admittedly, there is probably a bit more of the villain thing going on for a few chapters or so.

Ooo - I didn't even think of the double meaning for the chapter summary. Rose is on her way toward healing. She is most definitely in a different place than at the beginning of the story - and I have no intention of sweeping her emotional progress under the rug, but as she progresses, there will be other challenges for her to overcome.

Yeah, I don't think her idea of practicing defense is a bad one, either! The Auror trainees are just kind of stuck in a tight spot right now - they know some things that Rose doesn't.

Haha - I put that in there about the DADA because *of course* Harry isn't going to protest, but I'm working off the premise that these next gen kids don't know about Dumbledore's Army. I feel like Hermione wouldn't let Ron and Harry let their kids know just how often the trio broke the rules when they were at Hogwarts - haha!

Rose isn't stupid about her own safety, just really, really frustrated. But I'll let you read the next chapter to find out more...

Thanks for the comment on the flow. I do have a beta, which helps *loads*, but I'm also taking a bit more care with the chapters and I re-read them a *lot* before posting. I'm getting to some delicate parts of the mystery and I don't want to mess anything up!

Thanks so much!

Beth





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Review #24, by insertofafanboy Boredom: Rose and Scorpius POV

30th September 2014:
Oh my god,im so nervous for what's to come! Your story is incredible, and your a really skilled writer. Keep up the great work...and don't kill me with Scorose feels...

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm so excited you like my story! Thanks for leaving a review. I'll try not to kill you - haha, but there is a bit of action coming...

Beth


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Review #25, by slytherinchica08 Bombarda Maxima: Scorpius POV

25th September 2014:
WHY YOU DO THIS TO ME?! I swear I should never read your story while I'm at work for fear of me tearing up and gasping, and yelling at my screen for all that you are putting me through.

I felt so bad for Al and Scorp in this chapter, as well as everyone else, but to me those two really stood out and made me feel so horribly for them. Al is definitely a powerful wizard, you can see that very clearly with these past few chapters and I can only imagine that that is going to come into play in the future chapters. Scorp is also powerful in his own right but definitely not nearly as powerful as Al. I still love the dynamic you have between the two as friends. They lean on each other and understand each other so well and its just a really nice to see. You can really feel Scorps pain in this chapter. He feels like he let her down, not knowing that she had all these scars on her body. But of course, Rose has been very careful to make sure that no one knew about them so its not his fault about that. Although with the ending it seems like something did happen in the past where Scorpius let Rose down and it seems like maybe it had something to do with this whole situation. But I guess only time will really tell for me.

I love how well these chapters flow. I never trip over anything while reading and there aren't any mistakes that glare out at me either. Its all just really well written and very enjoyable to read! Great Job!

~Slytherinchica08~

Author's Response: Hi!

I have to admit, I did chuckle a bit at this review. I didn't mean to make you gasp or tear up. But this chapter is pretty intense. Actually, it is the first thing I wrote for this story. I wrote from here forward and then filled in the previous chapters.

Scorpius just... doesn't know what to do with himself. He wants so, so much to be there for Rose, but he just doesn't know how to approach her. He doesn't want to disregard her horrible experiences, but also doesn't want to make her feel like a victim.

The past experiences between Rose and Scorp are the ones mentioned earlier - when he was sleeping around Hogwarts. He didn't know she had feelings for him (*she* didn't even know that) and he was still grieving for his parents. Nonetheless, they two of them danced around each other and never quite took that step - they were just really good friends.

Thanks for the compliment about the flow of writing - I'm so relieved. I edit each chapter several times, and read and reread, so it's good to know that is coming through. (sometimes you read it over so many times, you don't even know what it's saying anymore - haha)

♥ Beth


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