737 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ImaRavenclaw Broken: Rose POV

10th October 2016:
Hey Beth, Lily here with BvB!

Oh my Godrick, I love the fact that you open with Rose having a panic attack. It makes me need to know how she gets through them. I like how you have those actions: Get up, wash, get dressed, class, rounds, study. She's so obviously a Ravenclaw. I always do that, I just list down things I need to do mentally, and make sure that I do them all.

That is interesting. I kind of agree with that. It does sometimes take more time to understand things, and start noticing them.

This is all so descriptive and bone chilling, I love it! No wonder you got the Dobby for most addicting story!

That's where Rose goes wrong. You should always have supportive figures there for you. I'm sure her brother would love to help her, or her friends, maybe her cousins.

STILL SO BONE CHILLING. I love how she's asking herself why she keeps that picture close to her. I'm wondering what she means by "the old Rose" now. What do you mean by 'it'? Are you talking about a panic attack?

Drug her? What?! I need to know what happens!!!

Rose was kidnapped and held hostage? Oh my Godrick this is good.

*laughs for about five minutes when Lily finds out that McGonagall fell off her chair* But really Ravenclaw isn't that bad when you're a Malfoy. I would have only fallen off my chair had Scorpius been put in Hufflepuff or Gryffindor.

I can literally just picture a Ravenclaw prefect hoisting Albus onto his shoulders and dragging him to the table, while his facial expression doesn't change and stays completely stunned.

If I were Ginny I'd smack James over the head too.

Now wondering why considering these things is so dangerous. I guess I'll have to keep reading to find out!

Beth, this was phenomenal (like I said, I can see why you got the Dobbys!), oh my Godrick it was really awesome!

Thank you so much for writing such an amazing story. I hope that you have a lovely day!

Yours sincerely,

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Review #2, by k1187700 Brewing: Rose POV

29th September 2016:
What? His parents? WHAT? Do not see this coming! WHAT?

Also Astinine moving with Rose into the ministry . . . dangerous stuff! Shiftiest lady in the story! Keeping tabs on Rose and now all the aurors . . .

Great chapter! So happy you updated! I was so worried you'd forgotten aboutthis story! I need an ending! I'm too invested!

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Review #3, by Bluewolf80 Brewing: Rose POV

29th September 2016:
Yikes!!! That's got to suck to see your parents like that. Although, Harry might not mind seeing his Dad's pic! ;)

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Review #4, by Ronald8472 Brewing: Rose POV

25th September 2016:
Damn... what a cliffhanger. I feel like I'm waiting for a new season. Please continue the story. Oh and please hurry before my brain implodes.

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Review #5, by Matilda Broken: Rose POV

23rd September 2016:
Hi! I was just wondering, what is this "review tag" thing that you mentioned when you reviewed Lostmyheart's story? Thanks so much in advance!

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Review #6, by BabyHuey116 Brewing: Rose POV

31st August 2016:
I've been enjoying this story very much, and I'm looking forward to seeing you finish it.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm working on the last part now!

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Review #7, by MrsJaydeMalfoy Brewing: Rose POV

20th July 2016:

I just stopped by to leave a few reviews for your week on the Hot Seat, and I see that there's a new chapter of this that I haven't reviewed yet!! What is this madness?!? Oh well, whatever madness it is, there's no time like the present! We'll kill two birds with one stone - your first hot seat review from me and my insane need for more of your story! And, by the way, before I jump into my review, I just wanted to thank you for donating to keep HPFF around!!

And now, the review...

I KNEW IT! I KNEW THOSE WERE SCORPIUS' PARENTS EVER SINCE ROSE GOT ASSIGNED THE CASE FILE AND SHE KNEW SOMETHING WAS OFF! Call it intuition or what have you, but I knew it! And while I'm kind of bouncing around in my seat with excitement, I'm also heartbroken for Scorpius and really wary of his reaction, as well as curious and wary about what's going to come of all this. Clearly his parents were murdered, so WHY? And what kind of affect is this going to have on him? And who in the Ministry was in on this cover-up? And why? GAH, so many questions!!

As for Al, I'm SO happy that he's starting to heal, even though I know the process will be slow, at least he's able to smile a little and get enveloped in work again. And it was great seeing Rose being able to enjoy his recovering as well, because to me that's kind of an indication that she's healing, also.

The moment in the hall with Scorpius was so cute and sweet, if a bit heartbreaking. Scorpius has been through SO much with his parents, then Sels, and now he's just constantly afraid of losing Ro and the baby.. poor thing! I really hope this latest development doesn't push him over the edge.

And OH my goodness, only SIX WEEKS until the baby's born!? This is SO exciting, but also really nerve-wracking. Because I just KNOW Stannous is going to do something, either before the baby's born, or as it's being born.. something's going to happen and I'm terrified!

And, I really REALLY need another chapter now, but I'm also really afraid to read it. :P

Well done and MORE PLEASEEE!

And now I'm off to find another story of yours to get hooked on. :D

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Review #8, by marauderfan Better: Rose POV

19th July 2016:
One more for review hot seat! Also, this is my 1500th review which is exciting and I'm glad to be able to celebrate it with this story :)

I can find it kind of believable that Rose can't relate to Ron as well as she can relate to her uncle Harry. I mean, I totally see Harry as being super close with all of his family because he never had a family growing up, whereas Ron had a lot of brothers and is just better at relating to boys.

geez I can't believe Harry and Al were just chilling in his office while Al HAD BROKEN RIBS. I mean, seriously. Priorities. Thank goodness Rose stopped by.

YAY ROSE. That's a step in the right direction to talking about her feelings! It could easily be that she and Scorpius will just cuddle and hold hands and not talk about it (this is actually quite likely) but... she has to catch on by now that Scorpius likes her. That goofy grin was enough to give it away to even the most oblivious people.

And of course Harry has noticed :P

Aw, this chapter was really cute. Great work on it - I'm really loving the story so far!

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Review #9, by marauderfan Bitter: Scorpius POV

18th July 2016:
Finally, we had dinner with Harry and Ginny, who never forgot the anniversary. -- This is so believable. Of course Harry would feel a lot of connection with a kid who's also lost his parents and has nowhere else to go - he was the same. I love this... especially because it shows how much Harry cares for Draco Malfoy's son, regardless of his history with Draco himself. That says so much about Harry. What a good person :)

eep Scorpius' thoughts about Rose are so cute. how he just wants to see her every day all the time. So yeah, he may not technically be a teenager anymore but based on the way he's acting... Aw. Young love :P

Oh I love that you described exactly what sort of corruption was going on in the Auror department (I mean, we knew the rest of the Ministry had problems, but it's nice to see the specifics for that department) and how Harry was able to restructure it.

haha that's like the classic teacher move, calling the person who's disrupting the class up to the front to 'volunteer' for whatever thing. Even worse when it's your dad noticing you not paying attention... Sorry, Albus! :P

Thank goodness for Scorpius intervening and saving the day. I think everyone else was too scared to..

“Albus Severus!” -- oh boy

Poor Al, though. He is under a lot of pressure. And I honestly loved the way they sorted all of that out. Harry has grown up a lot since Hogwarts, and seeing the way he handled that situation was really great. I think Al is very similar to how Harry was at that age, so Harry understands what his son needs. They can't both be hot-headed in this situation, and he recognized Al's achievements, and Scorpius's as well and it all turned out fine with no hard feelings. Good job Harry. And Scorpius of course.

I love that you had the Auror dept using the animal acronyms for their exams as well haha, the SNAKEs

Haha, Al at the end. What a sneaky devil :P

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Review #10, by marauderfan Besotted: Rose POV

18th July 2016:
Another one for the hot seat!

Aah, seriously, who thinks the cruciatus curse isn't enough and actually invents a spell that intensifies it?!? Poor Rose, I can't believe she suffered six days of that. I did appreciate learning more about Rose's back story here though, and I'm glad she is starting to come face to face with her trauma rather than hiding from it. Of course that will be difficult, but she has good friends who love her and maybe soon she'll be able to open up to people about her captivity.

I, myself, had been brought up by Ron Weasley, so a little burp here and there didn’t even register on my radar. -- haha. For some reason I really loved this. I can just see like, 6-year-old Rose burping at breakfast and Ron saying "good one" and Hermione being exasperated. :P

Drunk Scorpius. Aw. Gah, these two SO obviously like one another and it's obvious, but I also feel like they have a lot of personal issues to get through before they can be together (at least that's probably how they see it?) Nothing like jealousy to make you realize your feelings for someone :-/ but I also can't really blame Scorpius for behaving like that. He was going through a lot and had no idea how to cope. I love that Rose is still so supportive of him and not bitter about her past with him.

Another wonderful chapter :)

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Review #11, by marauderfan Bereft: Scorpius POV

18th July 2016:
Hi Beth! I'm here for the review hot seat!

A kitchen accident. -- Nnnoooppe. I don't believe a word of it, not for a second. Wasn't Astoria saying to Scorpius just in the last chapter something about "it's not safe"? She knew, or at least suspected something was up. I hope Scorpius doesn't believe the Official Ministry Report either, because it's a cover-up.

I would’ve seen the leak in the stove – or smelled it -- but he does believe it! I guess I can understand him not being suspicious yet though. He's still kind of in shock and hasn't fully processed what happened. He's more caught up in the fact that it happened and not in why. I wonder if he'll start to think about that, especially given the last things his parents said to him, once he's had more time to adjust. Either that or I'm seeing things that aren't there...

Aw. I love that Rose and Albus came to visit him, that scene was so emotional and such a wonderful thing. like, it's impossible to process grief totally on your own, and they were exactly what he needed, just being there for support. Aw ♥

Oh no, poor Scorpius. Angry visiting Weasley family members who don't know the whole story - that's the last thing he needs when "it's not what it looks like" isn't going to get him anywhere. This scene was really well written though, with Ron overreacting and Rose shutting him down, and Harry being so used to Ron's outbursts that he's quick to react and hold Ron back without batting an eye. I laughed at Rose's departing line about "something untoward with the toilet", hahaha!

I love your interpretation of Daphne's story, as well. Makes a lot of sense, as the Greengrasses weren't known to be staunch supporters of Voldemort, and while their loyalties during the war are uncertain, the effects of the war are bound to have had an impact on her and Astoria.

All you need to know, Scorpius, is that you are much more like your mother than me.” -- Aww. This honestly says so much and I really liked this line. Although Draco hasn't appeared in this story much (and based on what happened last chapter, he won't be appearing much) I feel like I already have a pretty clear idea of who he is. He's definitely not proud of what he did during the war, regrets it, but still holds it against himself, hence why he never talks about it. I think he's happy Scorpius is a lot more like Astoria.

Small thing, but in that last section about Scorpius going to stay with the Potters, often you say "the Potter's house" when that should be a plural possessive, i.e. "Potters' house". Otherwise, the chapter is perfect. I'm really glad to have come back to read more of this story - can't believe how much I missed it. Onto the next chapter!

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Review #12, by Shinicha Brewing: Rose POV

11th July 2016:
Oh I can't wait for the next chapter! I just knew it was his parents, but I'm not sure what it means, ie why they were killed. (I admit I was much more cautious about all the details when I read all the chapters in one go). Also, why is Astatine in Rose's office? I'm convinced she's evil and she was there at crucial moments (in the bar, the hospital..) :(

I'm glad to see Al better again. And the description of Rose's discomfort makes me never want to have children haha...

So happy to see this story continued!

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Review #13, by Summer_Raven Blown Away: Scorpius POV

6th July 2016:
I really like the backstory you gave Scorpius!!! It's very different than anything I've heard before (in a good way). However, I didn't feel like I needed to know all that information. It's only the third chapter, so I'm not that emotionally invested in Scorpius' character. This backstory would be very interesting to me if it was revealed later in the story, playing on a bit of suspense and having me liking Scorpius already. It's not terrible where it is, if you want his character to be pretty straightforward at the beginning, but I would consider shortening the flashback. A chapter dedicated entirely to exposition is really hard to pull off anytime, and especially since this is the beginning of the story, having the plot moved further in this chapter would be a good idea.
I like your voice and description. You're a great writer and this is a pretty good fanfic so far. Keep it up!
- Summer_Raven

Author's Response: Hi there!

I just logged in to see this review. Thanks so much for the feedback. I've always been worried about that flashback - (worried that it was too long). You bring up a good point. I think I put it in because I wanted the story to be about *both* Rose and Scorpius - so I could show that they both have had rough patches to get through.

Thanks again!

♥ Beth

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Review #14, by qui_fli13 Brewing: Rose POV

5th July 2016:
So glad this was updated!! It's amazing!!

Author's Response: Thanks so much. It's my goal to finish the rest of the story (rough finish - then edits) by the end of this month!

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Review #15, by Fan Brewing: Rose POV

2nd July 2016:
I'm doing bookbinding/publishing/Illustration/graphic design in uni atm and I'm going to send you a hand made binded version of this story when it finishes if you want to :D

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Review #16, by CambAngst Brewing: Rose POV

29th June 2016:
Hi, Beth! Tagging you from the new review tag!

Astatine again. I think we've covered this ground, but I'll reiterate: Do. Not. Trust her. As an added bonus, Uncle Harry and Healer Lawrence agreed that Astatine could work with me part time. Bonus for who?

Awesome! We're finally back to that Healer School assignment. I've been waiting and waiting for that to come back to the forefront of the story. You are so devious! You were probably hoping I'd forget all about that.

“Where’s the glass?” -- Go, Albus! I knew your dad recruited you into law enforcement for a reason. I love the way you wrote him in this chapter. He's recovering from such a horrible loss, and I felt like that came through in his need to be helpful. It also seemed like the interest Selenia took in the crime scene photos motivated him even a little more to get to the bottom of the case.

He placed a hand on my enormous belly and, as if on cue, the baby started kicking against him. -- Aww! Such a precious moment for the two of them. Sad that it couldn't come without the unfortunate baggage of the prophecy and Stannous and his bunch of wannabe Death Eaters.

I'm glad that Scorpius is helping Rose to realize just how strong she's been throughout this ordeal. She's been through so much and she's survived an awful lot of it just by keeping her nose to the grindstone and refusing to give in to the misery.

Hmmnnn... So the Healers were still running tests on the victims two days after they were declared dead? Very suspicious. My brain, she's a racing! Of all the cases that Healer Lawrence -- with his vast expertise and seeming adoration for dark curses -- could have assigned to Rose, why this one? It seems almost inconceivable that he wouldn't have known that the victims were Scorpius's parents. And Healer Lawrence is the same one who's assigned creepy Astatine to help organize Rose's workspace. Lots of unpleasant signs are starting to pile up here. I'm really curious what else Albus has found in the photographs. I guess I'll have to wait until next time to find out...

I'm so very pleased that school is out! Hoping that life grants you many hours of quiet, uninterrupted writing time. Or failing that, hoping that you can distract your family for a couple of hours a day and hide out with your computer. :p

Until next time,

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Review #17, by Lightinthedark52 Brewing: Rose POV

13th June 2016:
I started reading your story yesterday and just
finished this chapter.
I love it all!

I'm not going to lie, I love fanfiction and admire
the talent of all the writers like anyone else, but
I do have many pet peeves when certain things don't
line up with Canon or the HP world.

You've done an excellent job of fully creating your
own unique and amazing story whole not altering the
world itself!

The characters, wow I love the characters! They all
are so likeable (or unlikable in some instances) yet
it's done without a feeling of "polished
perfection". They feel real! Like real people. They
have faults and strengths.

These last few chapters! When Selinia died I
literally put down my tablet, went to my boyfriend
for a hug explaining the nicest ever character in
the fanfiction I was reading died. I so didn't
expect that or see it coming. At all. Poor Albus! My
heart broke for him.

I think his reaction was realistic, although there's
no formulae to writing grief, the same where there's
not one to processing it in real life...not really
anyway. Rose and Ginny having to take him food. I
love that Ginny and Hermione kept coming around to
clean. I found their presence missing at the
beginning of the story too much, well Hermione at

Albus being there for the baby's first movement was
so so so perfect the absolute perfect way to
transition him out of grief. I loved it! I didn't
even miss Scorpius in thay scene, in fact I think it
was more helpful that he wasn't there for Albus to
see the couple-ish vibe, remember the hopes for his
own future and get sad again.

As for the photographs, I don't know if I was the
only one but from the first mention of it in the
story I strongly suspected their identities. Then
when mentioned the wounds in more detail and that
the man's eyes were grey, I was absolutely sure. I'm
excited to see that plot unfold! So sad for Scorpius
again though, I expected him to eventually see the
pictures but I realy hoped it wouldn't happen.
That's just absolutely horrible that he's having
that experience.

I'm finding it suspicious how James girlfriend just
up and left. Also, I'm shocked so many family
members are working on Rose's case. I just kind of
thought that they'd find it more beneficial to let
strangers (and maybe ONE family, like Harry himself
as the head of Aurors) be involved as family or
close relations usually let emotions get in the way.
Which is happening all the time with these guys.
That's one of the only things I find unrealistic.
Sure the others would of wanted to be on the case
but at the end of the day the head Auror is in
charge and needs to enforce that and those under him
needs to know he's doing what is best for them all.

Also I kept thinking if I were Harry or Rose or
someone, only three people initially knew about the
baby. I would of let Rose disappear somewhere, leave
Europe if necessary and fall of the grid. Not tell
the press etc(I still don't understand why they had
to 'release' ANY info) but keep her in hiding
totally (and other close family if they had to) til
the baby was born and keep the baby a secret. Sure
Rose would have been giving up alone, especially in
pursuing her career but keeping the baby safe vs
career, there's not really a case there. So I was
shocked none of them suggested that/it's not what
happened. No complaints that it didn't though cuz
the plot is amazing, it was just me having one of
those reader's moments where you want to jump into
the screen and yell at the characters.

I noticed update gave been slower lately from your
author notes in chapters. The selfish side if me
just hopes you update ASAP and as frequently as
possible. The not selfish side is just so thankful
and happy you wrote this story, and hopes everything
is well with you.

I know that was kind of long, but it's been 41
chapters so I had a lot to review on! :)

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Review #18, by BellaLestrange87 Brewing: Rose POV

11th June 2016:
This is for the Blue vs Bronze review battle!

YOU UPLOADED ANOTHER CHAPTER YES THANK YOU THANK YOU (I need to finish the next chapter of Seek and Chase to thank you)

It makes me really happy to see that Rose is back to work and isn't beating herself up over the death of Selenia (*glare*). To be honest, I'd forgotten entirely about her medical records assignment. I'm hoping that it will lead into Stannous being caught and sent to prison for the rest of forever. *winks*

I'm really happy that Albus, like Rose, hasn't been torturing himself about Selenia's death. I'm glad that he's trying to get back to work so he can focus on catching Stannous.

But Scorpius. Beth, what are you doing to Scorpius? He seems really stressed out and anxious about everything. I just wish he could get a break.

What. The ending. What. I knew that Albus would find something but I was not expecting that. What. Draco and Astoria's bodies were placed so that they appeared to have died in a car accident? What. Why.

I must know why. New chapter? *offers cookies*


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Review #19, by Tonks1247 Brewing: Rose POV

7th June 2016:

I have been waiting for this chapter for AGES! It starts to answer the really big question that has been bothering me for at least the last 10 chapters (okay, so maybe more like one of the many questions, but like, answers! Finally!). Honestly, you should have seen my freak out this morning when I finished reading the chapter. Almost embarrassing, to be honest…

So. Start of the chapter. Glad Rose is settling in to her new office and that Albus is back to work! Like, it’s a big step for him and to see him back is amazing. His interest in the case study is also interesting. Love how Rose just kinda lets him go at it and gives him whatever he wants to keep him going with looking at this case.

Also love Rose talking to Scorpius. Like, have been waiting for them to chat about it and Scorpius to actually admit how much everything is affecting him. It’s good for Rose to reassure him and get him to talk, though I’m pretty sure with how this chapter ended…well…he’s not going to be in a good place. Especially based on the story he told and what Rose’s case study says and the discrepancies that Albus pointed out with the lab results. Like, my heart is so broken for him and for Rose because I just know this isn’t going to go well. The poor bloke has enough on his plate without this being dragged up and being a big mystery like this…

That said, I am super interested in finding out more about this case and what all is going on/what all happened. I think I was ahead of the game back a couple chapters when I had the nasty feeling Rose’s case study was related to Scorpius’ parents, but now I think it’s just getting worse because I get this feeling Stannous is related into the entire situation as well. Like, just what doesn’t need to happen, but I could totally see it. Totally makes sense. Can’t wait to see where it goes.

I also have to laugh. My concern at the end of this chapter, besides Scorpius’ wellbeing at the discovery that Rose has been working on this case, is how Scorp didn’t see the case study pictures or hear Rose talking about this case and put it together earlier xD

Anyways. Lovely chapter Beth! Quite enjoyed it! Can’t wait for another chapter! :D


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Review #20, by madness Brewing: Rose POV

7th June 2016:
OH MY GOD. Way to drop a bombshell there...

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Review #21, by Pheonix Potioneer Buildup: Scorpius POV

20th May 2016:
Just read the entire thing in one day, and it is brilliant! Keep up the great work!

Selenia's death was devestating! Never expected that.

So... I can't help but think that everyone is missing some big thing as to Stannous's intentions. For example, when he kidnapped Rose, I understand using crucio flagnate on her and releasing her to show that she is the girl in the prophecy. But if he thinks he is the father, why didn't he sexually assault her? Did he honestly care enough about Rose to wait until she was older? I don't understand it at all.

And then, when he came back two years later, he was really stupid. There were two other people there, just sleeping. If he really wanted to kidnap Rose again, he just needed to cast muffilato. He's not stupid- he successfully forged his Hogwarts application without anyone finding out, and he got past the wards to their apartment. So, I'm forced to conclude that the mistakes he made were actually deliberate. For example, when they attacked Rose and Scorpius at the hospital- clearly Stannous was smart enough to figure out that Rose was there, and which room she was in. But instead of going himself, he sent really low-key people. I know they said that Stannous was probably hoping to overwhelm them with numbers, but... come on. He had one shot at this. He shouldn't waste it.

So clearly Stannous is smart- and dumb. OR he is smart and plans these attacks to distract from someone else. Stannous has the best aurors trying to find him, so maybe he is trying to distract them from something else that might be going on. That's the only reason I can think of why he would be so stupid.

Speaking of the hospital, Rose's fall is also interesting. She trips over nothing (probably a trip jinx), falls and sees someone. Probably either Stannous or one of his lackeys. My guess is they hospitalized her in order to make it so she would forget her revelations about the case she was working on. She said she couldn't remember anything, so after Rose was unconscious he probably obliviated her. And then to cover up the noise of Rose falling her probably used muffilato, which is why James and the other people in the house didn't hear Rose fall.

And I don't think Selania died by mistake, with death eaters mistaking her for Rose. They look completely different! I think Selania was killed because she knew about Rose's revelations on the case. I think they killed Selania instead of Rose because it was easier, and it actually would have been harder to obliviate Selania since that would have to be done secretly. They could kill her openly. And of course, they didn't care to keep Selania alive. They need Rose alive because of the child.

And speaking of the case Rose was working on, we saw that the papers ended up back in the drawer- and we know that the papers were strewn all over the place when it fell. So that means that either James or another resident of the house put it away for her OR whoever insinuated Rose's fall, and who was working for Stannous, did it. My guess is the latter. But if they tripped Rose to make sure that she would never solve the case, then why wouldn't they steal the papers? Why would they leave it in the house? Unless they tripped Rose for an entirely different reason. Or that person is a member of a third party- someone else who knows about the prophecy, but isn't working for Stannous and has his own, independent motives.

But if we assume that the person who tripped Rose works for Stannous... then we have a HUGE problem. Actually, we have a huge problem either way. Because that person was standing in Grimmauld Place, and were not detected at all. That is BAD NEWS. That place is protected with a freaking Fidelius Charm! So if Stannous can get in there, then that is very very very bad. Of course, that does raise a bit if a mystery, because then wouldn't he just try to attack Rose there, instead of the hospital? My only explanation is that Stannous does not want to reveal that he can get into Grimmauld Place. I think he's saving that reveal for after Rose's child is born.

I think that part of Stannous's plan, now that Rose is pregnant, is that after the baby is born he will kidnap the child and raise it to be a dark wizard. After all, the prophecy says that the child will be super-powerful, so those with malicious intentions would probably want to use that child. If that is the case, then it's sort of like season 6 of Doctor Who: Amy is going to have a powerful timelord child, so she gets kidnapped by Madam Kovarian, she has the baby, and then the baby is kidnapped. So I feel like this is going to follow a similar plotline. And that makes me very scared for Rose, Scorpius, and their child.

So the events I am eagerly anticipating are:

a) Rose having her child. Hope it will be happy occasion and not riddled with negative situations (but it probably will). I also want to know whether the baby is a boy or girl. And can I just say that the current names they have chosen are terrible? I know, whole star constellation family tradition thing, but come on.

b) Rose possibly solving that case that she was SO close to finishing before she fell and lost her memory. I'm really curious as to why they were murdered, and who their names are.

c) Scorpius and Rose's wedding! I'm hoping, once again, that it will be an extremely happy occasion, and that death eaters don't show up (like they did during Bill and Fleur's wedding). But I doubt my wishes will be granted.

c) Finding out Stannous's endgame, even if it absolutely terrible. I just want to know.

Anyway, great story so far, and keep it up!

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Review #22, by Lee Jackson Broken: Rose POV

18th May 2016:
I absolutely love this! I also picture Al and Rose as Ravenclaws, and I'm glad to find another fic writer who agrees :D

I love where this is going, and you've definitely earned the Dobby for this one!

I also want to say: well done on creating an accurate and realistic portrayal of depression and panic attacks. I don't know whether or not you intended for Rose to come across as depressed, but what Rose said is true: the hardest thing for people with depression to accomplish is the ‘get up’ part.

I think I've been looking for a story like this for a while.

Thank you.

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Review #23, by oldershouldknowbetter Breakable: Rose POV

9th May 2016:
Back again for some BvB.

Again you show, that when Rose is in her element - as in the healing/comforting of Lily - then she is brave and resolute and confident. It is an almost 180 degree from where she was, panicking and holding onto Lily not four or five paragraphs before.

Her Aunt is an old hand at this waiting game and comforts them both, you spell as much out later, but it is obvious here in her actions. Rose might denigrate her aunt's offer of tea, but it is precisely the sort of normality that Lily requires.

On a completely different note, and it's a funny thing to be mentioning here, but it is funny that I should read this chapter again now, because I am just writing one of my own where Ron is offering Draco (who is sitting in his kitchen) a cup of tea; for much the same reason as Ginny is offering her daughter one. It's just funny, coincidences sometimes. I cannot wait for you to read the chapter, but unfortunately it is one that occurs in Rose's sixth year and as such will not be posted for quite some time.

Anyway, back to your story, enough of my chatting off topic.

Rose gets angry and this is good. Gone is the girl of the beginning of this story who would have retreated further into her shell. She is angry where she should be too: with the Death Eaters; with the unfairness of it all; but especially with herself. Your readers are really seeing a Rose who is turning a corner in her life. She wanted to go out in the previous chapter, away from her home comfort zone, and in this one she is furious at herself for her inaction in the face of danger.

It is not her forté, she shouldn't be that hard on herself, but she wants to break out of her chains of insecurity.

I like the training room that the Potters have in their cellar, I just might have to borrow that for my own story ... (if you don't mind that is). Though it does remind me of my own conceit, that Harry had his children and the cousins trained in defensive arts from a young age. I guess we see a certain thing about Harry - I don't think that he has ever forgotten the lesson of Constant Vigilance.

Ginny appears, after Rose has vented her frustrations. In the rest of this chapter we see a real bond that is developing between these two women. Rose and Ginny already had a strong Niece/Aunt relationship, but now it is morphing into a more adult one; especially with the shared burden of being in love with Aurors. And they both have double the worry: a son and husband for one, and a boyfriend and father for the other one.

Rose is clever. For all her faltering in the face of danger, which has it's legitimate origins, she is still highly intelligent and observant. The way she picks up upon the subtle hint her aunt drops - that Rose's mother may just understand her plight - is very well done.

Her mum coming along and hearing it all is a good storytelling technique. I am always impressed by your abilities with the tools of story construction. Her mum had to know, but to have it all told to her again would have been doubling up your writing. It's good stuff. As well, let me not trivialise it, as being good for the character of both Rose and her mum, as far as your story goes. It will bring the two of them closer together with the knowledge of the shared horrors that they each had to endure.

Rose finally acknowledges the efficacy of tea. Again, lovely story construction, as it is a turn around from earlier in the chapter.

Oh, one thing that I meant to mention earlier, is the little bits of spell work that you are creating in this story. It is a trap to start making lots of new spells and it's one you don't fall into. The way you add to the spells we already know, with advances/extras is a beautiful way around this pitfall. We already know the Reparo, but now you give us the Instar Reparo. And also with Rose having the miniaturised healer's bag. The other trick, which you also do, is to make any new spell something that doesn't stray too far from the unwritten rules of how JKR's magic works. All good stuff.

Scorpius reappears with a vicious wound, and 'Healer Rose' snaps into action again. And we also find out to our relief that everyone is OK, never minding a scrape or two. But Rose knows what to do, she will accompany Scorpius back to the Ministry and tend to the wounds of the Aurors - as she has done many times before. I know when she gets there, she will brook no argument as to her presence.

This is the aftermath of a chapter of action, but it doesn't feel any less dramatic for it. Probably because you choose not to reveal to us the fate of the Aurors left behind till the very end of the chapter. We are witnessing the birth of a new Rose, one who is breaking out of her shell, and ready to take on the world. I really like how this story is going and where it is headed.


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Review #24, by oldershouldknowbetter Breakout: Rose POV

4th May 2016:
Hi there, tagging you back for the BvB.

Well we come to this chapter. In my reviews of the last few chapters, I've said that they were tidying up most of the strands of the first act of your story and setting up what we could all expect from the storyline to come. Well with this chapter the second act truly begins. We have a Rose and Scorpius who have stopped the dancing around each other and have declared their mutual love. We also know that we have two young people who are competent in their respective fields; more than competent really, they could shine and be truly great.

Thus do you set up your players ... and then you do this chapter to them.

Oh well, lets get into the review proper.

What makes the coming events even worse, is that it effectively destroys the fledgling steps that Rose is just beginning to take at the start of the chapter. In the last one she got the sudden idea to go out, she wanted to feel normal. Here we see her internal fortitude, what she thinks she lacks, coming to the fore; for example, is she about to have a panic attack - no, she controls it. Good for her.

Here is also where we start to get to know some of your supporting cast better. The story has been focused upon Rose and Scorpius primarily, which is where it had to be, but now that Rose's horizons are broadening, so too are the story's.

You introduce us to all of the people who are at the bar that night and with each one they all have a little bit of characterisation to go with them. The two exceptions are Selenia and Samara, no you give us extra with them. It is well done how you intertwine their physical descriptions with the description of the character of the two girls. We know Albus fairly well (though the hug which he gives Rose, reaffirms just how close the two of them are), and James too, it is good to now really come to terms with just whom their partners are.

Rose is so desperately trying to hide the gory details from everyone and largely it works. Even when she gives Scorpius a big smooch in front of everyone, it doesn't give it away. She diffuses her cousin's overprotective eye with a bit of throwing it back at him. I like the sass that you have brought out in this more confident Rose; when she feels comfortable and confident and happy, she can give as good as she gets.

You do at least give Rose a couple of hours of pleasure, of living life as a normal person might, before you drop the drama upon her. You even bring back into the story Astatine, having her work at the bar to support her meagre wages is a good device to do so, but I get the feeling (like me with Stephen) that you liked writing the character and so used any excuse to bring her back in.

And then Dom comes along. Ah, the character of Dom that you have already presented us with is one who is insightful but forthright, and she certainly shows it here. She immediately divines the secret that Rose wants to hide, and just as quickly blurts it out for everyone to hear. But Rose is relaxed and happy and more sanguine about the truth getting out than she was at the beginning of the night (and when she had less firewhiskey in her, may I also add).

You also have just a lovely scene with Albus. We see even more how close the two of them are, they will talk of things that neither of them would with any other. I do so like how you have Albus reaffirming how good the pair of Rose and Scorpius are together - how both of them have helped each other out of dark times. We know this, and Rose sort of knows this, but it harks back to the running theme that you had before, about how she was honest with everyone but herself. To have Albus straight out say it to her, she cannot deny it to herself any longer; she must accept that she is truly worthy of his love and it comes from more than mere attraction. A much deeper wellspring than that.

And that is when you drop Drama and Plot down upon our heads like a ton of bricks.

There is a disturbance in the club. The initial confusion when something like this happens you portray well, but then a glimpse through the crowd reveals, dum dum dah, Death Eaters.

You write the action very well. The confusion that the characters feel about what's going on and why, is never shared by your readers. The actions of all your cast are spot on in character, are all clearly delineated and come from a logical extrapolation from who they are.

Albus and Scorpius are competent and rise immediately to the challenge. But poor Rose, once again when confronted with a situation that is out of her comfort zone, fails at it. Her nerves get the better of her and she fails to preform the spells that she needs to. But within her comfort zone - that of caring for other people - she is still strong. She doesn't forget that not only is Lily not with them, she is probably alone. Rose will not leave the bar without her, against the protestations of Scorpius. Though he understands too and goes with her to find Lily, at the insistence of Albus (which will take on a greater importance in a chapter to come).

When they find Lily, Rose also finds out that the Death Eaters are here because of her. Though as she later points out, the 'Red' could have also applied to her. This we know will do a lot of harm to Rose's mental well-being. She will blame herself for every injury and death in the place, just because 'she felt like going out'. *sigh*

But again you show that whilst she is lousy in combat, she is great when she has to care for and protect someone - as she disappears from the bar and takes Lily with her.

A dramatic chapter, the true start of the second act of your story, filled with delicious characterisation and thrilling action. Well done.


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Review #25, by Penelope Inkwell Bound by Love: Rose and Scorpius POV

27th April 2016:

I mean, the hints were there. Probably most people guessed it. But still!

You know, I'm really glad that he proposed *before* finding out she was pregnant. It's such a cliche to propose just after, and it allows Rose to feel the full strength of his support, hopefully, as she faces this news.

Also, A++ to Scorpius for that proposal. Tossing a Seeker a ring instead of a Snitch, on the professional field of (what I think is) her favorite team? Ravenclaw colors? Just, very well done.

I'm also so glad he was finally insistent about her taking a look at her symptoms! We finally get down to the bottom of all this!

Man, that's gonna make Healer training hard. Of course, I suppose that's the least of her worries, what with the giant scary prophecy and all...

Oh gosh. Ron's gonna murder Scorpius. Just... murder.


“Just dress warm and comfortable,” having won the debate, he hopped off the bed,grinning in self-satisfaction.
--Two things here: (1) I think "having" should probably begin a new sentence, rather than being attached to the dialogue. (2) there needs to be a space between the comma after bed and "grinning".

I cannot wait to see how this goes over with the fam. And what they're gonna think about the prophecy in light of these new developments. Oh boy.


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