291 Reviews Found

Review #1, by crestwood Besieged: Rose POV

16th December 2014:
Hi Beth! Just stopping by to start back with this story. It really has been forever and I can't believe I haven't read this yet.

I'm kind of glad you skipped over the first week or so of their relationship. I like to see them comfortable with each other like this. (how I'm used to now that I've read so many of the later chapters)

I know the whole 'lets not tell anyone about things because we're in the same group of friends and it might be awkward' thing all too well. Not to mention the thought of going a day without someone feeling like a foreign concept. The way you worded her developing feelings for him was superb.

I haven't actually read Ron's initial reaction yet, but I can only imagine. That'll be fun to see how he responds. You describe the simple act of kissing in such a rich, substantial way. I could read a chapter of just that, you genius, you.

OKAY I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING. I was not prepared for this at all. It went from so sweet and fluffy to this, how? I knew who it was right when I read 'Good evening, Rose.' What a frightening way to greet someone. It's all made worse by how polite he's being.

This is all so terrifying. I can't even imagine waking up in the middle of the night and the man who tortured you out of your mind is just sitting there in your house, waiting.

I never knew the exact way she was kidnapped in the first place. This makes everything so much worse. I understand the trust issues a lot more knowing that Stannous was someone she knew. Not only someone she knew, but her favorite teacher. Even worse still, the way you describe him as a teacher and person, I really, really like him. I already know his motivations, but I'm still speechless about his betrayal. This makes everything creepier and so much more horrible.

I would be here for a prequel in which we see the school year leading up to Rose's graduation. I know this is nowhere near finished, but at the end of it all, if you are searching for something else to write. I would totally be here for seeing Stannous in that light.

He must be powerful to get through the wards like this. And his associate as well, for Disapparating without a wand. These guys are certainly dangerous.

The fact that he knows all of this about Rose is scary. I almost hope that he's been watching her. I don't even want to think about if he had connections inside of St. Mungo's.

I love how hard Rose fights back against these guys. You can really feel that she wants no part of getting kidnapped again--because of course she doesn't. You really feel just as surprised an anxious and frightened as she does.

Luckily Dom is there and able to think so quickly on her feet to call backup and everything. I can understand the reasoning behind a lot of later developments now that I've read this.

Her panic attack at the end was honestly so sad. Seeing her reduced back down to that so soon after she finally got together with Scorpius and was starting to feel safe again. I have a feeling this will set her progress back some. Excellent work on this chapter, I just love this story. This is still one of my favorites on the site and I hope to come back really soon and keep reading!

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Review #2, by mymischiefmanaged Better: Rose POV

15th December 2014:
Hi Beth,

I'm here for our swap :) It's been a while since I left you a review and I'm glad to be back!

This is a short chapter but I think it works. The description of Rose's relationship with Harry is sweet. I can imagine Harry being intrigued by a baby girl. The whole concept of family must mean something so different to him than to most people, and his attachment to Rose fits in with this. I wonder whether you'll show how Ron feels about this closeness? I'd imagine that Rose is probably wrong about Ron wishing she was a boy, and Ron just struggles to show his affection as well as Harry does. In that case, I expect having his daughter feel closer to his best friend than to himself wouldn't go down that well with Ron. I'd definitely be interested to see more of this.

Al's adorable. I like how he doesn't bother to be even slightly subtle and just wants his friends to sort everything out and be happy. He's suddenly so cheery and it's a huge contrast to what we saw before in his duel with Harry, which gives his character a lot of depth. Different people bring out different sides of him, and that's very real. I like him. He might be my favourite of your characters.

And then Harry's telling Rose that Scorpius fancies her is the perfect ending, especially given that we know how bad Harry is at reading other people. I love his relationship with Rose.

Great chapter, great story :)

Emma xx

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Review #3, by dracodarlingxx Baffled

13th December 2014:
Oh, god no!!
Poor Ruth! And bloody hell, poor Rose! She's going to feel so bad after this! And I was just feeling happy because I thought Scorpius might have a surprise for her when she gets back to the house or something. . . and then this happens! Nooo!
There were so many perfect little things in this chapter that made me smile so hard, from Rose being defensive of people thinking Harry used the Killing Curse, to Bill loving his kids enough to use the Curse, to the Al saying that the War isn't the 'good old days' for his parents, to Harry and Ginny understanding each other implicitly, and Hermione trying to work out the prophecy. But by far the part I loved the most was the start, when Rose and Scor were being just so cute together!
P.S. you know the prophecy? Am I just being thick somehow, or can the prophecy not be referring to a child of Rose and Scorpius? But how does Scor not see that?
CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER!!

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Review #4, by ravenclaw_princess Broken: Rose POV

9th December 2014:
Hello, here for your BvB review

I really feel for Rose. Poor thing. It sounds like she's been through some traumatic experience and is bottling it all up inside. While I'm really interested to see what happened to her, at the same time, I don't want to know what someone has done to break her so much.

You captured well the panic attacks that Rose is suffering since her traumatic experience. It was quite clear that she is broken and only managing to get by, by throwing herself into routine and 'normal' life. I loved the repetition of 'get up, wash, get dressed, class, rounds, study'. It shows her mindset quite clearly. She has to focus on something, because if she lets her mind rest, she starts to go to terrible places.

I liked the little bit of humour put into the end of the chapter, with the sorting hat. There is also a nice flow between the back story of Hogwarts with the events of the current day. Its also cool to see they were all sorted into Ravenclaw (which is different to what you usually see), and goes well with them all being top of the class.

Well done on your first chapter of this story. It sets up the beginning of what sounds like a great story.

Jacqui

Author's Response: Hi there!

Oh, I'm just so excited you decided to try out this story. It is the one I've worked the hardest on - and I'm so glad you like the first chapter.

You've hit it spot on - at this point in the story, she is trying to keep her PTSD and the after effects a secret, but she's so traumatized that she doesn't even know how deep she's gotten. Poor thing!

I'm glad you found the description of the panic attacks realistic. That was really important to me. I didn't want to play them off as overly dramatic or just a story point. Panic attacks are very real things and dealing with them (and their reasons) is an important step to recovery.

Thanks again - I hope you come back to read more!!

♥ Beth


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Review #5, by CambAngst Baffled

6th December 2014:
Hi, Beth!

New facts are tumbling out all over the place in this chapter. From big ticket stuff like the wording of the prophecy to small details. I loved the mix of heavy and light moments and the heights of mad love versus the harsh grounding of reality. All in all a very well balanced chapter.

I love how the dialog at the start of this chapter picks right up where the last chapter left off, except, um, things have happened in between. A lot of things, apparently. And then they happen again. A few more times, actually. I have to chuckle, because they sound exactly like a couple in their early twenties who are madly in love. If we could all maintain that kind of stamina later in life...

I see I'm not the only one who can get a bit nauseous if I'm too hungry. Then you add apparition on top of it, yeah I'd say you don't want to see goulash right after that experience.

James's girlfriend is a profoundly annoying human being. Leave it to the American girl to always be the more annoying character in a HP fan fic. ;) I'm not sure whether you're leading anywhere else with this. At this point, I find my suspicions aroused by a lot of small details in this story. Samara seems like the odd one out, at least socially, in the group cohabiting in Grimmauld Place. Leave it to James to be clueless enough to bring a questionable entity inside the protection of the Fidelius. Good thing Samara can't share the secret...

Hmmnnn... I guess there is no canon certainty as to what spell Molly used to kill Bellatrix. From the description in the books -- the emphasis JKR put on the fact that the spell struck Bellatrix directly above her heart -- I'd always assumed it was something more base and violent in nature than the Killing Curse. But, like I said, we don't know for sure. It could just as easily have been the Killing Curse. We know that they were both dueling to kill.

I kind of liked the "pensieve player". It's like a portable DVD player for magical folk. Only it didn't sound especially portable or user-friendly. ;) But it's definitely easier than having a handful of witches and wizards dive into a pensieve together.

The prophecy itself sounded very... um, prophecy-like? Is that a thing? I don't know, it's hard to explain. Prophecies in Harry Potter are like good pizza or being in love. You can't explain in words exactly how to recognize either one, you just know it when you see it. And this was definitely prophecy-like. I liked the combination of specific on some points and vague on others that you achieved. There's just enough said to point to Rose and possibly Stannous, but an awful lot that was not said. I still think the "child born from a family of death eaters" is much more likely to be Scorpius. "A lost soul descends from those who were the dark lord’s retreat" The Dark Lord lived in Malfoy Manor for around a year before the final battle. Just sayin'

Rose, Stannous thinks it is Stannous. We have no idea who it could be. -- Finally, somebody's talking sense here!

Good old Harry. He really seems to have a talent for getting to the heart of Rose's anxieties and putting her at ease. I guess it helps that he's the only other person who's been the subject of a history-altering prophecy.

Uh oh. Looks like the long reach of Stannous found poor Ruth. Especially considering the curse that killed her.

Suggestions? Not much of a substantive nature in this chapter. In the prophecy, I think you should have capitalized "Death Eaters" and "Dark Lord". Otherwise, you're in great shape!

Awesome chapter! I really enjoyed this one.

Author's Response: Hey there Dan.

As usual, your review has completely blown me away - thanks so much!

Yeah - this chapter is a biggie. Rose and Scorp are hot n' heavy.

As it turns out prophecies are *really* hard to write. I'm still not happy with it, but I couldn't hold up the entire story because I wanted to tweak the wording one more time. And I thought it was really important to have it written down as part of the story - rather than to just have the characters discuss it.

Haha - I get carsick really easily - so I imagine that I would have a difficult time with just about any type of magical travel. I can't decide whether apparition would be worse (spinning around, but arriving quickly) or floo (less spinning, but a longer, rambling trip). I would probably pick the quicker one - get it over with. Portkey sounds the worst - a hook around your navel? You might as well just take all the contents of my stomach while you're at it.

Yeah, Samara is ultra annoying. But we always have to deal with those types of people. She works for the Ministry - in International Relations, so Harry cleared her for having the secret to the fidelius charm - but I think you're right - it's probably a good thing she can't give it out.

I did research Molly's spell when writing this - and you're right - there isn't a certainty if she used avada kedavra or not. From what I've found, they just call it "Molly Weasley's spell." Now that I think about it - the actual spell isn't important, because she did kill Bellatrix and I wanted that point made in this story - that there is a different set of rules when you're fighting for your children's lives ;)

I know we differ on our views of Harry as an adult, and I'm glad you like him in this chapter. I've always thought he became rather Dumbledore-esque in his later years. Once he was no longer a moody teenager and had a piece of the darkest soul inhabiting his body - or the weight of the future of the entire Wizarding World on his shoulders, I think he would be able to act with more calculation and draw on his experiences - rather than passion and gut instinct. He's older, wiser and calmer. But - I like the different characterizations of him too ♥

Yeah - poor Ruth :( Just when it seemed Rose needed her...

Thanks - I've already got those changes put into the queue!

♥ Beth


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Review #6, by Jeannette Baffled

4th December 2014:
I am obsessed with this story at the moment. I was constantly procrastinating studying for my finals to read it. AHH! And what a moment to leave off on! I love the characterization of Rose and her development through the story. I love that she is in Ravenclaw however, you can still tell she is the daughter of two Gryffindor's. Scorpius is just the perfect boyfriend. Love him. Anyway, Keep writing! This story is awesome your writing is awesome and I can't wait to read what happens next. :)

Author's Response: Hi Jeannette!

Thanks so much for this review! Aaah! I'm so excited that you like this story. I really wanted to write a different version of Rose - one that didn't make her *exactly* like Ron and Hermione, but more insecure. She doesn't know how brave she really is.

Gah - you're too kind! Thank you so much for letting me know that you like my writing! I hope you don't procrastinate too much for your finals - good luck!

♥ Beth


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Review #7, by Anie Baffled

3rd December 2014:
How am I supposed to study for finals when I have this looming over my head?

Brilliant writing, well developed characters and a plot that rivals that of published authors.

Like I said earlier, I look for your story specifically and you have yet to disappoint. Keep up the great work and happy holidays!!

-Anie

Author's Response: Hey!

Ooops! I forgot to mention something in the last response (good think I get another chance :))

Rival published authors? I'm swooning. Wow. Thank you so much. I can't even...

Happy Holidays to you too! Good luck on your finals!

♥ Beth


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Review #8, by Anie Baffled

3rd December 2014:
How am I supposed to study for finals when I have this looming over my head?

Brilliant writing, well developed characters and a plot that rivals that of published authors.

Like I said earlier, I look for your story specifically and you have yet to disappoint. Keep up the great work and happy holidays!!

-Anie

Author's Response: Hi again!

I'm just so giddy with your reviews. Thank you so much! The story is planned out for the next several chapters, I just need to work through some editing.

I really appreciate you taking the time to let me know how much you like it. I have a HUGE smile on my face right now!!!

♥ Beth


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Review #9, by Ranger Beloved: Scorpius POV

3rd December 2014:
Someone should tell him that Draco did nearly kill several people including Ron.

Author's Response: Hello,

Yeah - Scorpius doesn't know that. His parents didn't discuss the war with him and Draco pretty much turned into a recluse after the war. Then Draco and Astoria were killed, so Scorpius never got the real story. He only just found out about Hermione's torture.

~Beth


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Review #10, by Ranger Breakages: Scorpius POV

3rd December 2014:
I am so sick of self righteous Harry who keeps sticking his nose into things that aren't his business. Mainly Ron and his relationship with his children in which Harry has inserted himself even though he has no business being in it.

Also speaking as a man if I were Ron I'd have beaten Harry down for hiding that torture bit from me and then I'd have cut him out of my life. Its so utterly dishonest, some amazingly dishonorable that it makes me hate Harry.

Harry who so has to be the center of attention that he interferes with a father daughter relationship from the start. Then he ignores all of Ron's VERY salient points. The storyline is very intriguing but oh how I loathe Harry.

Also a Ron bashing warning in your summary might be warranted since one of the main points of the story seems to be Harry taking Ron's place as Rose's father.

Author's Response: I'm not exactly sure that I've written Ron the way that I've intended if you're getting this much out of it. Harry didn't really insert himself in Rose's life, rather he was always around because he is Rose's uncle (and godfather). Ron is pretty bad at showing emotion, so Rose just felt like it was easier to talk to Harry. Ron's got that Weasley temper and my version of Rose doesn't.

Harry was in a pretty tough spot on this one. I don't think he really WANTED to keep this from Ron - and he did mention that to Rose, but as Head Auror, his job was to keep her safe above all else.

I'm not a Ron-hater. I love Ron! I just wanted to flesh out the more complicated aspects of the relationships with the next generation.

~Beth


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Review #11, by Ranger Better: Rose POV

3rd December 2014:
Wow Rose is really a terrible daughter. I mean the bit about being closer to her uncle Harry was more than a little creepy. Plus why the hell would Harry get to name someone else's child? That deeply odd.

Author's Response: Hello,

I'm sorry if it came off that Rose is a terrible daughter. I didn't mean to imply that at all. My version of Ron is that he just doesn't know how to relate to his daughter as well as Harry does. Ron was always bad with women. It took him years to admit he had feelings for Hermione.

As far as the name goes, I think Ron and Hermione (who were Harry's very best friends) didn't have any ideas for names, and Harry just added a suggestion that they liked. At leas that's how it is in my head...

~Beth


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Review #12, by Ranger Bereft: Scorpius POV

3rd December 2014:
Frankly Ron was amazingly composed given the situation. If it had been me in his place it would have been much, much worse

Author's Response: Hi there,

Ron was really fun to write. He always did have a short fuse when it came to dealing with the women that he cared the most about.

~Beth


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Review #13, by k1187700 Baffled

3rd December 2014:
Good chapter! I like that the story is moving forwards more too. Again, I like that the original characters have kept parts of their own personalities. I am so happy to finally know exactly what the prophecy says! I like to try and guess if any twists are coming and that kind of the keystone here :P

Glad Rose and Scorpious are back together, I do love them together.

Just one quick question:

Any chance Rose is pregnant? Just the throwing up, the emotions, the being sleepy, I believe there was even a mention of her looking radiant or something . . .

Update soon!

Author's Response: Hiya!

I knew you would like this chapter :) I love Rose and Scorpius together too!

Yeah, there was a lot of information in this one, huh?

Haha - I don't want to give too much away, but I will say that Rose is dealing with a lot right now...

Thanks again - I love getting your reviews!

♥ Beth


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Review #14, by harrypotterfan13 Baffled

2nd December 2014:
wow...i just love the way this story unfolds...i think the prophesy is definitely about rose and scorpius as it says "when the two hearts will meet"...!!!
and i think rose might already be with the child...or may be not...keep up the good work ,can't wait for the next chapter now.!!

Author's Response: Hiya!

Thanks so much for taking the time to write a review. I love your guesses, but I don't want to give too much away ;)

Thanks again!

♥ Beth


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Review #15, by MargaretLane Baffled

2nd December 2014:
I laughed aloud at the thought of Rose mistaking Samara for one of the dueling dummies, accidentally on purpose.

She does sound really annoying and then complaining it's too easy, when she's spent the whole time making mistakes and playing at being helpless.

And asking when she's going to learn an ILLEGAL curse. I do not like this girl.

There are a couple of words here that I think you should have capitalised, like the Burrow.

LOVE the part where Dom says Bill said he didn't understand until he had his own kids. I guess you can't.

And there should be a full stop after "if you say so," and a capital "s" on "She was so blase about the whole thing."

I also like the way something things are taught in more detail in America, as obviously it's not such a sensitive topic over there and is probably discussed more academically. Coming from a neutral country, I know we have a pretty different attitude to say World War II than the countries involved.

*laughs at Ginny never saying anything about Samara* I like the number of "outside" characters you've introduced. It makes sense that in their Hogwarts days and now in their careers, they will have made friends we don't know. I particularly like the fact you don't have all their friends the children of Harry's friends, which I see sometimes and which I always consider somewhat improbable.

I can totally understand that she'd want to hear it herself. Hearing a thing at second hand, it's impossible to completely separate it from the impressions of those who are telling you about it. Even if they describe it completely neutrally, their tones of voice and body language will give it more meaning than it had originally. And that is a really good point that some word might have significance only to her.

I THINK the "Dark Lord" should also have capital "D" and "L".

I can't make any more out of that prophecy than I already had - that it's probably the child or Rose and Scorpius.

And I now want a sequel to this - before the story is even finished - about their child growing up and what is so special about him or her. That's assuming it is their child, but it seems pretty logical. And one way or the other, I'd love a story about the child, whoever the father might be.

Hermione has figured out it could be their child. I'm surprised the others don't seem to have. Rose is supposed to have a child with somebody whose family member was a close associate of Voldemort's; she's dating the grandson of one of Voldemort's closest associates.

The part about the "lost soul" is interesting. That's the only additional piece of information I've picked up on.

I wonder if Scorpius has figured out he could be the father too. In one way, he's the most likely to come to that conclusion, as his family's past is probably on his mind more than it'd be on other people's and he is likely to have already thought about the difficulties of somebody from a family of Death Eaters getting together with somebody from a family of blood traitors and on the other side, Muggles. And he is acting as if there's something on his mind.

This is REALLY nit-picky, but when Harry asks Rose if she wants to hear the prophecy again and she says, "not right now, Uncle Harry," there should be a comma after "now."

That REALLY is a good question, as to whether her child will be good or evil.

But I don't think things are as mapped out as she seems to think. Didn't Dumbledore say not all prophecies are fulfilled? And even assuming this one is, the fact that her child is destined to have the ability to do great things doesn't mean how they choose to use their power is predestined. Whether they choose to use it for good or for ill will probably be partly influenced by how she and the child's father raises them, along with other influences they meet, their own personality and of course, as Dumbledore would say, the choices they make. And she will have some influence on those choices. Voldemort was descended from generations of people with mental health problems, effectively abandoned at birth (even if it was by the death of his mother rather than deliberately) and raised in an orphanage in an era when orphans were treated as lesser than other people. Her child won't have those experiences.

And Harry has pointed that out WAY more succinctly.

Oh my gosh, I did NOT expect that ending. Ruth is dead. Perhaps Stannous wanted her to give him information Rose had told him in private during their sessions and killed her when she refused. It DEFINITELY bears his signature and I can't ignore the fact she would be privy to some of Rose's private thoughts.

I assumed she was just in this story to help Rose recover. It didn't occur to me she might play a part in the mystery.

Author's Response: Hello!

Thanks for all of your awesome reviews! I really look forward to hearing what you think of each chapter!

I really can't stand when a woman plays helpless - that's probably why I played it up so much with Samamra. Playing helpless AND wanting to learn illegal curses AND accusing Harry of using it - she just struck out in Rose's book.

Thanks - I'll go back and check for the proper capitalization and other fixes :)

I'm so glad you picked up on that. It is one of the underlying themes of the story. Molly Weasley would probably have never used the killing curse, except under those circumstances. I really wanted to highlight that - and explore what sort of power love can have over people's actions.

Yeah - I was worried that it was going to be too obvious that the child could be Rose and Scorpius, and I think it is. I worked really hard trying to write out the prophecy (they are REALLY hard to write, by the way - :)) and it isn't as successful as I'd hoped. But Scorpius is totally clueless about it. For one, he doesn't know a lot about what his father did during the war. I thought about it a bit and I really feel that Draco wouldn't be forthcoming about his role in the war to Scorpius. He viewed his son as a new lease on life and wanted to erase the past. Along the same lines, the trio didn't really get into their experiences too much with their kids as well. As a result, that particular Death Eater line isn't obvious to anyone straight off.

I know *I* would want to hear the actual prophecy, so I knew Rose would as well. I think it comes down to her nature of trying to figure out an answer for everything.

Yeah - Hermione's a bit quicker than everyone else at getting to the true meaning. Scorpius is simply too swallowed up by his own emotions on this one - he'll probably be the last one to figure it out!

Yeah - there are still a few different ways this could go (really trying not to give too much away, here), but Harry is confident that Rose's child will not be evil.

Glad I caught you off guard with that one. Ruth's death is definitely significant...

Thanks again!

♥ Beth




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Review #16, by LightLeviosa5443 Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

1st December 2014:
Hi honey! I'm here for the BvB!! :)

SO EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER AH.
I've decided that for this review everytime I read a big word I'm going to stop what I'm typing in this and say the big word because... I don't have a reason to be honest. Also, I would just like to say that I stopped listening to one direction to review this, so obvs i love you very very much ♥ ;)

I love how Scorpius is just having a moment over the fact that James can go go go go go and I love that Scorp and Al are kind of struggling to keep... Incredulous... up. I WISH THAT SCORPIUS WOULD JUST SEE THAT LIKE, HE COUNTS AS SOMEONE IN THE PROPHECY TOO. LIKE HELLO, YOUR DAD.

H E L L O.

He kills me, he really truly honestly just does. What a great transition scene, of course Rose is studying. LOL I love how Selenia just goes. She's my spirit animal, tbh. Like I'm pretty sure I just want to be her when I grow up. Because I'm not grown up now. Obvs. I feel bad that everyone had such a big fight because it really truly breaks my heart to see everyone just not together as a whole. I WANT EVERYONE TO BE TOGETHER AND GET MARRIED AND HAVE BABIES. YAY IT'S BACK TO SCORPIUS I LOVE FLIP FLOPPING!

A W E SCORPIUS IS SO HOOKED ON ROSE 24/7 AND IT WARMS MY HEART LIKE NOTHING ELSE. JUST AW ALL OVER THE PLACE!! oops i probs could've turned capslock off there. I didn't even use capitals in that one. Okay, not looking at how I type anymore, focusing on the story. Hi. :)

LOL RON. That's all I have to say about this section. L O L R O N .
omg scorpius, don't kill the son of the saviour of the wizarding world. that line should be my new tagline for things. i'm quotting your story, people will be all "where'd you get that quote" and i'll be all "oh this fab story that this fab woman Beth wrote and you should all fall in love with it because it's fab and so is she"... I just got so off topic im so sorry.

THEY ARE SO CUTE OMG. Okay, so this review was awful but this chapter was the opposite of awful. It was incredible. I loved seeing Rose all happy and carefree and just having fun. It was really nice and spunky and I think just what everyone needed. I'm glad to see that relationships are being mended and pieced back together. You've done a wonderful job with this and I can't wait to keep reading as you update ♥

xoxo Sarah ♥

Author's Response: Hi there ♥

Wow - you turned 1D OFF?! I feel so special - and loved!

I know - the lot of them aren't really picking up on the whole Scorpius could be the father in the prophecy thing - yet. I feel like they are all tied up in the "We need to protect Rose" part of the whole thing.

I love Selenia too! She is such a great character - perfect for Al, because she really loves him and isn't with him because of his status. But she's also not going to let him walk all over her. They have a really strong bond.

This was a really good chapter for the Rose/Scorpius feels - haha! Glad you like them as much as I do!

Ron is a trip. He is *still* a bit clueless when it comes to women - especially his daughter, but he loves her unconditionally and is not about to let *anything* bad happen to her.

I like that line too - haha! Al can be really tactless at times - he is also very protective of Rose.

You are too funny. You are fab, too ♥

This review was totally awesome! Thanks so much! I agree - they needed a bit of a respite from those several intense chapters!

Thanks sweetie!

♥ Beth


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Review #17, by Lululuna Blown Away: Scorpius POV

30th November 2014:
Hello! :) Here for our swap! I really liked the story and wanted to keep reading and try and review a chapter that had (slightly) less feedback so here we go. I'm making myself stop now though because I have an essay to finish, eep. :P

I have been numb for two years. I loved this line. It really stood out to me, and I loved how direct it is and how it tells so much yet leaves so much unanswered. Brilliant. The way it stands alone in a paragraph made it so crucial.

I'm so curious and sad for Rose and why she has these panic attacks. I know now that she was kidnapped, and that's so horrible and I'm so torn for her and I've just met her! You really built up suspense in the first chapter and I loved all the little details that brought her to life, like her routine for throwing up. Of course it was awful but such a strong way to introduce her and give us an idea of her physically.

And the idea that the hat was drunk when sorting them - too funny. :P How would the hat drink, anyway? I would love to actually see that happen...ahem, off topic. Anyway, it's great that although Rose clearly has inner demons she is fighting there's also a good combination of romance and humour and fun in the story. I feel like that's realistic: through humour and her relationships with other people, she feels a little less alone, leaving the fear and hate to come in waves.

The party scene was fun. Wolfie! I love him already. He seems so adorable. I'm excited to see him at work with Rose because they just seem like they would be hilarious with him talking about vomit and everything.

I’m so glad that Rose calls the creep an "aggressor." For many people, it would be difficult to even acknowledge that. Unwanted advances and the treatment women go through by people who either don’t know better or pretend they don’t know better are really close to my heart – well, critiquing them and being a feminist is really close to my heart at least. In Canada we’ve got a lot of talk going lately about harassment (ranging from CBC to Parliament Hill, yay...) and it’s great that you’re addressing it here. It makes me sad how Rose thinks it’s her fault for not protecting herself immediately, when really it’s HIS fault for being rude and aggressive. Not being able to keep from blaming herself seems very realistic of victims.

I love how you did such a good job of showing how close Rose and Scorpius are as friends, and how supportive he is in understanding why she’s upset and knowing how to try and comfort her. He’s protective, but not in a weird, overbearing way: in a really comforting and kind way that makes me feel like she would do the same for him. It’s so refreshing.

Ahh, so she was kidnapped? :( This makes me wonder if creepy bearded guy might have had some inside knowledge and was purposefully trying to make her feel powerless…

It’s so cute that Scorpius calls Arthur “Grandad Weasley”! His descriptions of the Potter house were awesome as well.

Wow, the scene where Scorpius discovers his parents are dead was just…horrible. Beautifully, powerfully written: I felt like I was there and my heart thudded into my throat when I first realized that they were dead. What happened to them? Who did this? I have to know!!

I feel so sorry for Scorpius too. Inevitably I feel like he will feel guilty for not having a proper goodbye and for behaving that way, even though it’s not his fault. Kind of like with Rose and how she blames herself with the creeper and has self-hate.

I'm really loving this!! Hopefully I'll be back for more reviews soon!! ♥

Author's Response: Hey!

This review completely blew me away and it's taken me a few days to be able to wrap my head around it enough to respond to it :)

I'm so excited that you kept reading - eep! You are the first person to comment on that line. It was totally meant to make the reader pause and also to make Rose pause for a moment and realize that we are starting off at a turning point. I wanted to start off at a low point - there is only one way for her to go from here.

Haha - I'm not sure The Hat was really drunk - I think that was just James's excuse for why all the gang was sorted into Ravenclaw. Although the image of a drunk sorting hat is pretty funny!

I like Wolfie too! Unfortunately, he is only a minor character - but he does show up from time to time!

Gah! I'm so excited you noticed my careful treatment of Rose's attack and her reaction. I'm really trying to be cognizant of the message that I send regarding how she feels and how it is dealt with. I think many victims blame themselves first and try to act like there isn't an issue. But hopefully, I've done an alright job showing Rose go through the emotions of healing and growing from this.

Yeah, I wanted to show that Rose and Scorpius connect on a much deeper level. He is head over heels for her, but won't act on that until she is ready. She's always been there for him - and they did have a (small) history - you'll see that it gets mentioned in the next chapter (I think).

Great job connecting he creep at the party with her kidnapping - all I'm gonna say right now :)

The next chapter discusses Scorpius's parents death a bit. But I'm so relieved that the scene came off well. I re-wrote it so many times, wanting to get it just right!

Scorpius does carry a bit of guilt from the way that they died. He left angry and spiteful.

I would love it if you came back and let me know what you think! Thanks so much for doing a review swap!

♥ Beth



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Review #18, by GingeredTea Blown Away: Scorpius POV

28th November 2014:
Okay, so WHOA, Rose obviously isn't the only person with a backstory here...

This was a powerful chapter and I am honestly not even sure where to start. I don't know yet where Rose' shirt ties in, and my mind is still trying to figure out what Scorpius' mom had been about to say. Did Draco kill her? Were they trying to run from something? Domestic violence that had gone on for a while? Ahh - my mind is full of questions!

Your writing was immaculate, your flow beautiful, and your characterization fantastic. Your description of how he feels seeing their bodies was beyond great and just so very realistic. Awesome.

Thank you for such a great review and I promise I'll have processed by the time I read the next chapter and manage to leave a better review on that one!

Author's Response: Hi there!

Thanks so much for doing a review swap! Yeah, I apparently love to write damaged characters. Scorpius has his own issues and all of the questions you've asked are answered in the next chapter.

Thanks so much for the compliments about my writing! I'm really glad that you think so!

Anytime you want to do a review swap - let me know. I'm really enjoying your story as well!

♥ Beth


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Review #19, by dracodarlingxx Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

28th November 2014:
I LOVE IT. YOU KNOW I LOVE IT. HOW COULD I NOT LOVE THIS CHAPTER?!
So, the stuff I loved: Al going crazy on a broom, the girls' makeovers, Scor trying to convince himself not to kill Al :'), Harry catching Selenia with lingerie (that sounds wrong . . oops :) ) AND THE UTTER BEAUTY THAT WAS THE END OF THE CHAPTER.
FLUFF FLUFF PURE GORGEOUS FLUFF and yesss she deserved it
please update soon xx

Author's Response: Hi there!

Wow - this review was completely unexpected and a real treat! Thanks so much for taking the time to write one.

I like the fluff too! I really wanted my story to be a little bit of everything, so I have some romance, a mystery, and... every now and then - a little fluff.

Thanks again!

♥ Beth


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Review #20, by Anie Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

26th November 2014:
I check this website periodically for updates on this story and this story only. Keep up the great work (and don't keep me waiting long please)!! haha

Author's Response: OMG! I just saw this and you totally made my week! Thank you SO much for taking the time to write a review. I promise there is much more to come!

♥ Beth


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Review #21, by CambAngst Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

25th November 2014:
Hi, Beth!

After a few very intense chapters, I can honestly say that I don't mind a little fluff. It was a nice change of pace and it gave all characters involved -- especially Rose and Scorpius -- a chance to settle down and ruminate on everything that's happened. The time apart seems to have done our two lovers a world of good. They realized that they missed one another. They're adorable!

The couple needs a break from one another, so the guy gets drunk and plays sports while the girl goes shopping and gets a makeover. I'd say your thought process was on very solid ground there. ;)

Even though I knew the answer before I'd asked, I'd tried to pull the Hogsmeade duty for this weekend. -- Ha! In your dreams, lover boy. I definitely agree with Harry here. I don't think Scorpius had any idea how badly his head had gotten messed up over this. Props to Albus for doing such a good job of getting Scorpius's mind off of things in this chapter. Not that it was unpleasant work, but I'm sure that he would have rather been making up with Selenia.

James was standing up on one of the tables, singing some quidditch fight song with one of his teammates, their arms draped around each other. - Now that's a funny image.

Rose came off as a much more balanced character in this chapter. She's enjoying her freedom, having her fun, but she can't completely shake the responsible side of herself.

Choosing a specialty was another ordeal I wasn't looking forward to. I truly enjoyed every course I'd taken. I had no idea how to narrow it down. -- I feel echoes of a certain individual who borrowed a time-turner so they could take all of the electives.

Ha! Poor Ron. If you're a Weasley, and you're trying to operate undercover, wouldn't you start by changing your hair color? He's hopeless!

My lungs filled themselves with air that didn't smell like a hospital or a three hundred year old dingy house. -- This. The perfect encapsulation of Rose's situation and why it must have meant so much to her to find this freedom.

Ha! I love the image of poor Ron and Harry running into Rose and Selenia outside the lingerie shop. Talk about a splash of cold water in the face. Their little girls and boys aren't so little anymore.

The end of the chapter was paced really nicely. It felt like things were touch-and-go there for a second. Scorpius didn't seem like he was sure what to do and Rose wasn't quite sure how to take that. But their feelings draw them back together, and suddenly everything is right in paradise.

I saw one lonely little typo while I was reading:

She loved flying and I bet missed our days of Quidditch at Hogwarts just as much as Al and me. -- I bet she missed

I loved this chapter! As much as I enjoy the plot of this story and all of the mystery and intrigue and guessing that comes along with it, I can't get enough of your Rose-Scorpius love! Looking forward to the next!

Author's Response: Hey there Dan!

I think Rose and Scorp deserve a fluffy chapter too! Plus, writing all the emotional turmoil was straining for me too - haha!

I'm actually feeling a little guilty for being a bit too cliche with my choices for how the girls and boys spent their respective weekends.

Yeah, Scorpius doesn't realize the extent of how deep he's embedded in this (perhaps there is a double meaning here ;))

I feel like Rose's true character is *finally* emerging here. Her sense of humor is coming out and she's getting to feel the freedom from her restrictions, but it is a bit more than that. She is truly experiencing adult life for the first time.

Ha! You always find all the little nuances I put into my story! ♥ I'm laying a little groundwork here... more to come with how Rose and Hermione both can't decide on which courses when it comes time to narrow it down!

About Ron. First off, we are only seeing him from Rose's point of view. She is never going to see her Dad as the superior Auror that he truly is. The second part is that Ron actually isn't trying to hide. He's pretty much taking the stance of basically daring anyone to come near his daughter. "Just try it, you Death Eater scum! Why don't you see the fury that rains down upon you when you mess with Ron Weasley's daughter!" Sorry - I'm getting a bit carried away.

Wow! You found the only line that I added when I edited this chapter! I felt like it was really needed to express the freedom that Rose felt - at long last. So glad it came through.

I had to add a bit of humor - and lingerie vs. parents is always humorous!

Rose and Scorpius are very different together in this chapter. I wanted their relationship to grow a bit - and to show that they connect on different levels as well.

Thanks so much for this review! I love all of your reviews!

♥ Beth

I fixed the typo - it's in the queue! Thanks for pointing it out. Definitely more plot coming next!


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Review #22, by Paddlewaddle Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

25th November 2014:
This was a less eventful chapter than the other two - and welcome change as well given how intense the other two chapters had been. It's nice to know that our characters can take some time to themselves to relax and think about their other half and just have a bit of time away from what is going on. And the fluff. GOD THE FLUFF. I LOVE ROSE AND SCORPIUS AND I CANNOT SAY THIS ENOUGH - especially the last scene - very different from their other scenes. Its much more passionate than raw and there is this sense of no inhibitions and an incessant need to just feel each other. Surprised they even made it to the bedroom, I was betting the furthest to be the stairs ;)

Can't wait for your next chapter!!

Author's Response: Woot!

Let's hear it for Rose and Scorpius fluff! I agree - they deserve it at this point! The last scene *was* a bit different. I wanted to show that they have all different ways of loving each other - and they are growing and exploring as a couple. :)

I really can't tell you how much I look forward to your reviews! The next chapter is up - I hope it doesn't disappoint!

♥ Beth


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Review #23, by Paddlewaddle Baleful: Rose POV

25th November 2014:
I can feel Scorpius' hurt so much right now. That he can't stand to not be there to protect her - that he almost thinks that she needs to protect herself because he isn't enough. Or at least that is what I'm getting when he speaks to Rose and thinks she doesn't need him. It makes me feel all broken up about them and the way he reacted when she came up stairs to see him? my heart is going all over the place!!

And the truth comes out now about the prophecy. I feel so sick that Stannous tried to torture Rose and I realise now that your original storyline would have made the prophecy much more gruesome than it is now if you went through with it but the original storyline would have also made much more sense in light of this prophecy. So it begs the question why Stannous would think so simply torture her for 5 days, and not try more if he thinks the prophecy is about him What does he get out of it coming true? What will the child do to his stature? So many questions!! I absolutely love where this is going, however dark it may seem. And I absolutely love the family feels in there - you just see the support and how much they all love each other. Absolute love!

On other thoughts, the entire time I was thinking that this prophecy was about Scorpius and Rose... Did no one from the family even remember Scorpius was a Malfoy? (which I love cause it just speaks so much about how part of the family Scorpius really is that they don't particularly remember his lineage).

Author's Response: Hey there!

So sorry that it has taken me too long to respond to these awesome reviews!

You've got Scorpius exactly! He gets so protective of Rose and she is his whole entire universe and he simply doesn't know what to do when he's faced with the idea of losing her.

I'm so much happier with how the story is going now. I feel like I can focus on the mystery and I've been able to delve a bit deeper into some other story lines as well.

Stannous wanted to test to see if Rose really was the mother in the prophecy. Once he realized that she was indeed, he knew that he needed to mass an army in order to prepare for this child of great power - so he returned her to her family to give him some time. He knew that he would need proof in order to convince his followers. I hope that answers your questions :)

Yay - Weasley and Potter family love - they really do care so much for each other!

Yeah, I think that the Aurors are so focused on protecting Rose that they are missing the obvious here - but don't worry! Someone with a lot of *brains* comes along really soon to make the connection!

Thanks again!

♥ Beth


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Review #24, by MargaretLane Broomsticks and Breathing: Scorpius and Rose POV

23rd November 2014:
Love the name of the pub.

And I like the references to James' job and how he doesn't have to get up early.

Aw, poor Scorpius. He's feeling guilty. I think he should owl Rose and apologise. She's probably feeling pretty bad, thinking he's still mad at her too. And she's been through a lot.

And poor Rose. She's clearly missing Scorpius too. And she's being so girly. Shopping and makeovers. *laughs* I feel like saying, "boring".

And I really like the way she gets stuff for Scorpius, even though he wasn't very nice to her when she really needed him.

I think even if she HADN'T forgiven him, she'd rather more reason to be annoyed with him than Selenia had with Albus.

I really like Rose's sensitivity - that she realises Selenia doesn't want to continue the conversation, so she doesn't even bother to defend herself by saying she has forgiven Scorpius.

And I'm really glad to see her feeling carefree. Gosh, does she deserve it after everything she's been through.

And I'm amused by the way she keeps doubting her father's ability as an Auror. That too shows how much better she's feeling, that she's able to see the humour in an Auror being unable to hide from his own daughter and being surprised by her changing her hairstyle.

I am very impressed with the way you can change from one character to the other, in first person, and have it immediately apparent you've done so. That can be difficult.

There should be a full stop, not a comma, before "I was still laughing, but she knew I was half serious".

I'm not sure that's exactly a compliment - to say he hardly recognised her and that she looked really good. But at least she knew what he meant.

Author's Response: Hi There!

Oh my goodness - you are so quick when a new chapter goes up! I love it!

Yeah, I went really cliche with how the girls and boys spent their weekends apart. I'm sort of regretting that now, but it did give a chance for us to see Rose blossom (pun sort of intended - haha!). I feel like this is the *real* Rose - the personality that's been hidden for so long because of her trauma - it's finally coming out!

Rose is one of the most empathetic people ever. That's why she's going to make a great Healer. She really can feel how others are suffering - and she can sympathize with them as well.

Scorpius gets overwhelmed at times - the emotions are just too much for him, and he runs away. More on that later :)

Yes! I really wanted Rose to feel carefree - I'm so glad that came across.

Haha - I have such a blast writing Ron. The whole bumbling Auror routine was mostly from Rose's perspective. I don't really view Ron that way - haha! He was being deliberate - sort of like taunting anyone to just *try* and attack his daughter.

Yay - I really work hard to make sure that I have a distinct voice for both Rose and Scorpius and I'm just *so* glad that it is coming across.

I will fix that - I appreciate all of your grammar fixes! ♥

Haha - yeah, Scorpius was a bit caught off guard with Rose's new look. He wasn't sure exactly how to take it - but she loves him anyway!

Thanks again for another awesome review!

♥ Beth



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Review #25, by BellaLestrange87 Baleful: Rose POV

22nd November 2014:
I'm so far behind on NaNo that I've given up on catching up. Instead, I'm going to read this like I should've ages ago.

L'erge Stannous is actually Unos Lestrange. That's another play on words, and very clever. I remember after reading a review on one of the earlier chapters and finding out that the spell Scorpius used on Rose's scars was a play on words. Very clever. *rereads to find out what else she missed*

I was extremely frustrated with Ron here. Yes, his intentions may have been good, but as Rose said, she is an adult and deserves to know everything, especially since the prophecy is about her. The very nature of this scene reminded me of Harry's conversation with Dumbledore in his office after Sirius's death in the fifth book when Dumbledore explained everything, saying he regretted not telling Harry the information earlier. It seems to me like Harry remembered the pain of not knowing vital information and resolved to not let family feel that.

I think this has already been pointed out but you missed a punctuation mark here - "Harry! Dad's alarmed voice broke the deafening silence and I jumped.

NO SCORPIUS DON'T DISTANCE YOURSELF FROM ROSE NOT NOW. Although it does seem fitting that the entire Weasley-Potter family is sitting down and he's in the corner. It sets him apart from everyone else, during a chapter when he seems set apart from them. On another note, why don't they realize that his grandfather is Lucius Malfoy? He's descended from a Death Eater family too. Honestly, I would much rather have this child of Rose's (has that happened yet?) be Scorpius's instead of Stannous/Lestrange's. Scorpius would act as a proper father, while Stannous would probably use them as a way to get at Rose. I guess we'll find out.

I think the Ron in Rose is coming out here, and that was exremely well done. She definitely doesn't want to just sit tight and wait while others put themselves in danger for her, she wants to go out and fight herself. It reminds me of the scene during Malfoy Manor. Also, the flippant remarks - "Does it say 'Rose Weasley will be attacked' or something like that" - definitely something Ron would say.

There was just the right amount of tension in the atmosphere, both at the beginning and then later, at 12 Grimmauld Place. I think it shows a lot about Al's character that he refused to Obliviate Selenia's memories of him being a jerk towards her, and only performed the bare necessities.

Overall, I enjoyed this chapter a lot. It definitely ties in a few things, like Rose's (I believe it was Rose) explanation in an earlier chapter of the fact that Stannous had forged his resume and notes in order to get accepted to Hogwarts. If he had changed his name, presumably to avoid the anti-Death Eater mindset that was probably occurring after Voldemort's death, he would need new documents. Especially if he was applying to Hogwarts solely to get at Rose. I doubt "I want to stalk Ron Weasley's daughter" would look good on a resume.
~Olivia

Author's Response: Olivia!

OMG! This review is just so sweet and I'm rather swooning at the fact that you're so into my story - enough to read other reviews and go back and re-read! Now I feel the pressure to make sure I've covered all my bases - haha!

But seriously, I'm so excited that you found the little details I put into the story! Yes! The letters in Unos Lestrange rearrange to be L'erge Stannous. Nice job - you were the second reader to notice that (someone else picked up how similar the name was to Lestrange, like CRAZY early), but I feel so excited when anyone notices!

I get worried at how both my version of Ron and Harry come off. But I *do* think about it a LOT. Harry, being Rose's uncle, is a bit more removed from the situation and can see a little clearer - although not quite clear enough to remember that Scorpius has some death eater blood in him as well - don't worry, that doesn't go unnoticed forever.

Yes! Ron is coming out more in Rose. Actually, I think her recovery is coming along to the point where her true personality is coming out. She is a bit more like Ron than she realizes and you will see in the next chapter that she's getting more of a free spirit about her :)

Albus is so hot-tempered, it really does get him into trouble, doesn't it? But he loves Selenia with all his heart and when it comes to her, he is in deep!

I think I've fixed the typo - thanks so much for finding it!

Haha - I think that putting "Stalking Rose Weasley" would definitely send a red flag up on a resume!

Thanks again, Olvia - this review was just awesome!

♥ Beth


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