202 Reviews Found

Review #1, by alicia and anne Chapter 3

30th August 2015:
Albus and Minerva's friendship is epic!

And she must have something on her mind if she hasn't moaned about Argus!

Awww poor Sadie, having a fear or distrust of wands, I hope that she can get over that and use one. But I'm so happy that she's doing very well in other subjects though. I agree with Albus, she's going to surprise us.

Molly's house is definitely the best place for her if they want her to feel loved again. I don't think that there's another place in the wizarding world that would fit that criteria.

I agree that she needs a lot of help too, but I know that Minerva and the Weasley's and everyone else will be there to help her and get her through it. The just need to give her time. And I can't wait to see more of her as this story carries on. I feel attached to her and want only the best for her.

Awww she's so happy about new shoes and I could just cry! I want to protect her so much and give her everything that she wants.

I love this! And I need to carry on and read more!

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Review #2, by Unicorn_Charm Prologue

11th August 2015:
Hey there!! Here with your review!

How have I never read anything by you before?! My goodness, I have been missing out! Even though this was a short prologue, I am completely captivated already. Your writing is just fantastic. It's so vivid and sucks you right in. I almost feel like I'm freezing, soaked and hungry, too. Wow.

So I'm definitely intrigued. I'm dying to know who this girl is and how she had come to be homeless in NYC. She obviously is familiar with magic, so I'm wondering if she is a witch, a squib or had known magical people before?

My heart broke for this poor girl. Especially when the woman at the shop was so horrible to her. I mean, she was out in the pouring rain, starving with no shoes. Who could be that cold towards someone so obviously in need. :( The poor girl.

The old woman was the cat! How interesting. It opens up even more questions that I will simply have to read on to find the answers to. And trust me, I'm definitely going to be back to read on!

Thank you so much for responding and giving me the opportunity to finally read your beautiful writing! I can't wait to continue on! Great work here!! ♥

xoxo Meg

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Review #3, by alicia and anne Chapter 2

27th May 2015:
Yay!! I'm back!! :D

Oh Harry, bless him for thinking that it was going to be about him. I bet he misses the attention haha.

I'm so glad that she's able to stay at The Burrow, especially with Mr Weasley, so that she could hear stories about her father. :D

I do love the background of how the Weasley's knew Sadies family, I can't imagine any other place that she would be staying. And I absolutely love that Arthur and Charlie named their kids after each other. Best friends ever!! :D

Oh no, I wonder who killed them and why? :(

I'm glad that she has them to look out for her and to show her around, at least she won't be alone. And Fred and George will definitely get her out of her shell and get her to open up :D

Oh no :( She can't talk, I hope that spell can be broken, and I wonder why that spell was put onto her?

Aw she's related to Harry! They're cousins :D

I really can't wait for more! I seriously need to get reading the next chapters, I'm so addicted to this story already, I love it so much! Your writing is wonderful and this story is so unique already and I can't wait to see how it develops and what other things your wonderful mind has come up with.

:D Keep up the amazing work! *squishes*

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Review #4, by marauderfan Chapter 10

27th May 2015:
Hi Farmgirl! I am back on land for a few days and here to appreciate and love this chapter!

This was great. You've got Ollivander's mannerisms and dialogue down perfectly, and as always I'm really impressed with your ability to adhere so closely to canon. Ollivander is kind of weird in that his love of magic and wandlore kind of gives him a strange energy that's a bit off-putting, but in his own way he did show Sadie that she has nothing to fear from magic. It was wonderful to see Sadie face that fear, realise she has a choice, and take a step to conquer her fear - she was close to following her flight instinct but she has already changed a lot now that she has support.

As always Fred and George really shine here. I will never tire of saying how much I love your writing of the twins!

Lovely chapter and I'm so eager to read more. :)

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Review #5, by merlins beard Chapter 10

15th May 2015:
Hi again!

I loved this! The characterization of Mr. Ollivander was a little different than I would have expected it, but it worked so well! I was a little nervous about this chapter, but everything seems to be going really well right now. Sadie starts to overcome her fears and trust the Weasley family.
I love all the Fred and George parts of the story, there can never be enough stories about them anywhere.

I kind of miss Sadie's interaction with her cousin a little. Harry did experience something similar to Sadie, so they should have something to talk about. I wonder if Sadie was told as a child what happened to her aunt and uncle (i think you said something about that in an earlier chapter, I can't quite remember right now.)


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Review #6, by merlins beard Chapter 9

15th May 2015:
Hi again!
I loved the trip to Diagon Alley so far! It can be a really magical place nd I'm glad Fred and George were the ones to show it to Sadie. Her characterization compliments the Twin's -especially Fred's - quite well...
I can't wait to see how this thing between them turns out.

Wow, they even show her their shop. They are right, it will be amazing some day, and I'm hoping Sadie will be a part of that.

The wand buying comes next, right? I'm nervous about that, because Sadie probably isn't going to like it much...


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Review #7, by merlins beard Chapter 8

14th May 2015:
Hello again! I guess it is time to get Sadie a wand. I have an uneasy feeling about that.

Can we please wrap Sadie into some Bubble-wrap tightly and -I don't know - never let her out of Molly Weasley's sight. I couldn't bear if something happened to her, but I'm afraid you're going to let her suffer a little more.

I love it when Fred and George are up to something!can't wait to see what George thought of during dinner.

He may be a little insensitive sometimes but I'm sure Sadie can take it.

Diagon Alley next chapter -I can't wait!


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Review #8, by merlins beard Chapter 7

14th May 2015:
Hi again.
I love that Sadie starts to communicate, and I think you made the right coice translating her signs. Do you know ASL? I have no experience with any sign language other than knowing it looks fluent and beautiful and impressive.

Aw Ginny admits her crush! So sweet... sharing that secret is the best way to show Sadie what friendship feels like.

Wow, Sadie made Fred see her memories in that state of panic. She has really strong magic. I doubt she knows that he could see that. I wouldn't know what to do with that kind of information... but I agree that it's not his secret to tell.

I really love your writing.

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Review #9, by merlins beard Chapter 6

14th May 2015:
I knew this was going to be bad. Poor, poor Sadie. I don't know how she could ever get over that.
Fred is so kind to her, like all the Weasleys. The dark mark frightens them all a lot, and Sadie just can't take it. I'm so glad that fred managed to catch her when she ran off. It will be a while until she tells someone about everything she's been through, and I can't help but think Dumbledore was right. The Weasley family really is the best treatment for someone who is heavily traumatized.
I'll just go to the next chapter to see if everyone is ok now.


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Review #10, by merlins beard Chapter 5

14th May 2015:
Hi again!
This chapter was so sweet. Bill has always been the big brother I always wanted... I'm so glad he's offering to be that to Sadie. I love the Weasley family and all their love and respect, but Sadie must be so overwhelmed by it all...

I find it interesting that you tied Bill's profession into this story, it makes me think that maybe he'll be the one who'll work out how to remove th curse on sadie.

Molly is just like she always will be, feeding them all all the time and worrying about all her children, both biological and others. I don't think she could chose between Harry and Ron of she had to... She loves them both, and now Sadie as well.

I'm a little worried about what happens next at the Quidditch World Cup... it could really traumatize Sadie so much more than she already is... i hope she'll be fine.


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Review #11, by merlins beard Chapter 4

14th May 2015:
Wow, this chapter makes me sad and happy at the same time.
Sadie gets a new family. They can't replace her parents and siblings, no one ever could, and they are not trying to do that. But they welcome her into the family like they did with Harry. The cousins have similar childhoods, and I never thought I'd say that, but Harry seems to have had it easier than Sadie...

wow, Arthur and Molly are her godparents... I wonder how Harry reacts to that. I think they should tell sadie soon.

It's so great for both Harry and Sadie to have someone they can call family.


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Review #12, by merlins beard Chapter 3

14th May 2015:
Hi again!
First of all: thanks again for explaining the timeline thing! I feel much more comfortable reading this story now, and I really enjoy it!

I love the talk between Dumbledore and McGonagall, it's just something I'd expect them to do, just sitting there having a cup of tea, not even having to talk to each other, like old friends who have known each other forever.

I find it admirable how you remind us of Sadie's horrible experience just a few lines about clothes. I had almost forgotten that she couldn't talk when Professor Dumbledore spoke to her at the end of the chapter. He does always seem to know the right thing to say...

I can't wait for Sadie to meet the Weasleys... I daresay they will frighten her a bit. If Hogwarts is a madhouse, then what is the Burrow?


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Review #13, by CambAngst Chapter 10

12th May 2015:
farmgirl! Seeing you post a new chapter is always awesome. I know I'm in for a treat.

I thought you did an awesome job with Olivander. You recaptured that mysterious, slightly spooky air that I remember from Harry's first visit to Diagon Alley. He's so fascinated with his work that he loses a bit of the broader moral context. That said, he's still compassionate and understanding.

Sadie's feelings were also described beautifully. I love the way you wrote the running battle between her fight and flight instincts, the way that flight comes close to winning on several occasions. I love how you expand her senses beyond the customary five so that she can feel the magic that permeates the shop and its contents.

Ollivander's dialog was really well written. It sounded like him and really reflected the passion he has for his art.

I love Sadie's change of heart, her first hints of reclaiming some of the control that was taken away from her. I'm really excited to see her begin to expand her boundaries.

You did your homework on the wand wood! Very impressive. I think that wand is a great match for her.

I'm very excited to see all of the characters return to Hogwarts and experience a new school year! Great job!

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Review #14, by Jet LaBarge Chapter 10

12th May 2015:
The quality of the story makes it well worth waiting for. I know after it is finished I will re-read it.

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Review #15, by merlins beard Chapter 2

12th May 2015:
So maybe I didn't check what era the story is set in... I don't usually read anything where Harry is still at Hpgwarts because JKR covered it anyway. This, however, has me totally hooked.
Most of the stories where a lost relative of Harry turns up are so unbelievable... like yeah, he has a sister -HOW did that work out? I get that here, it's possible for him to have a cousin who was believed to be dead. Those surrounding him wouldn't want to burden him with that (as Arthur Weasley points out). I love that Charlie is named after Arthur's best friend...

I have discoverrf something that doesn't quite add up... I hope it's ok that I point it out.
I'm trying to work out a timeline here - Harry's cousin is two years older than him. She must have been at leasr 4 when her family was attacked, because she survived on her own (and because she remembers McGonagall. Harry's parents were killed when he was one. His aunt and uncle would have been still alive then. I would think Dumbledore would have let Harry stay with them...
Also, if Charlie was Arthur's bwst friend, wouldn't Bill, Charlie and Percy (or even the twins) remember him and his daughter?

That's only my timeline obsession playing up, I can live with the slight alterations you have made and explain away most of what I just pointed out.
I love your writing.


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Review #16, by merlins beard Chapter 1

12th May 2015:
Ohhh this is so well written... I haven't seen many stories like that before... all the descriptions are just so perfect, so much detail without being boring.

It starts out so incredibly sad, and I'm afraid once we learn about Sadie's history, I'll be crying my eyes out. Something that affects Minerva Mcgonagall do deeply has to be really hard for everyone else.

I love Ophelia, she's just the right amount of crazy. The international floo call was an interesting idea, I never would have thought of something like that.
I can't wait to find out how Sadie likes Hogwarts.


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Review #17, by nott theodore Chapter 9

1st May 2015:
Hi farmgirl! First, sorry I'm so late with this - I ended up getting a Skype call from a friend and other various things distracting me from reviewing. But I'm really glad you agreed to do a review swap with me - I realised recently I hadn't been back to read the latest chapter of this story and had it on my reading list anyway. Now that I've read it, you're just going to have to write some more and post again soon ;)

Yet again, this was another wonderful chapter! I really don't know what to say when it comes to reviewing this story because you've already done so many things with it that I never thought you'd manage - I'm really enjoying an AU story, which I generally don't read, and I just keep repeating myself over and over again in my reviews on this story. Sorry if that gets boring, but I can't fail to be impressed at the things you write so well!

The way that you write the twins is so amazing. I really can't get over it - I've only ever written them as young children and I find that so hard to do, because they're such vivid characters in the books but so distinct; I find it hard to capture their personalities and write true to that. But you do it so well - I know that I do say this in every single review that I write for this story but you really do. Their speech especially just makes me feel like these passages could have come from the books if Sadie had been there all along.

I really liked the way that we saw some development in Sadie's character here - she's come such a long way since we first saw her at the very beginning of the story. She's starting to feel comfortable at home with the Weasleys, as if she's a part of the family, and becoming a little better at facing up to her fears that really petrify her. I also loved the little moment when Sadie started - really started, I should say - noticing Fred and him being different from George. It was a nice reminder that even with all she's been through, so much of which we don't actually know yet, she's still a normal young girl. I loved her sassy response to Fred though, the deep buried instincts coming out in her.

The visit to Diagon Alley was great. Whenever I reread the first book or watch the first film again, I always get reminded of how truly magical that first trip to Diagon Alley is - all of us, as readers, spend so much time thinking about this world that we've lost some of the wonder behind the magic in it. But you managed to capture that incredibility when Sadie visited Diagon Alley with the twins, with all the different things that she could see, even though she was apprehensive about the crowds and the sheer amount of people.

I really liked the different shops that they went in and the way that you used them to showcase different aspects of Sadie's personality. She's really good at forging links with animals, she loves reading and she's got a mischievous side as well and enjoyed messing around in the joke shop.

I loved the introduction of the property for the joke shop! It's great to show that they had the dream about the place for a long time before they got the money from Harry and opened up the shop in the fifth book - it shows that their dream's a lot more grounded and cherished and I love the fact that they both feel that they can share that with Sadie, and that they communicate that to each other even without speaking.

And now, you really need to get writing again so I can read more of this story ;) Thanks again for the swap with me!

Sian :)

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Review #18, by alicia and anne Chapter 1

15th March 2015:
Oooo yes! I'm continuing this brilliant story! I'm still so intrigued by that prologue and I can't wait to see how this develops!

Awww Hogwarts would be so weird if McGonagall went home during the holidays. Hogwarts is definitely her home and they both need each other!

An international Floo? That's definitely interesting!

Haha I can't stop laughing at McGonagall saying that never have her knees needed to breathe! That is brilliant! :D Haha I can't stop laughing! Just the mental image of McGonagall out on the field, sunning her knees in shorts.

Ophelia changed the girl into a rubber chicken? That is just pure brilliance! Did she really think that carrying around a rubber chicken was better than carrying around a unconcious girl? :P

Ophelia is wonderful! She's so brilliant and hilarious! I love that she's charging an international Floo to Minerva, that she's going to change the sheets and restock the ice tray, and ordering in chinese. I love her!

She's knitted Sadie prisoner! Of all the things to keep her in one spot.

This is yet another brilliant chapter, so perfectly written and I'm so excited to find out what's going to happen with Sadie at Hogwarts. I can't wait to find out more of her past and to see how she fits in with other people. I can see that McGonagall will be a great parental figure for her.

Author's Response: Another one! Goodie! Thanks so much!

I agree. Hogwarts and Minerva just BELONG together. I can't think of anywhere else she would be. (I actually have a backstory for that in my head, totally going against all Pottermore stuff, but oh well. Someday maybe I'll tell it.)

One of the things I have always loved about the HP books is that JKR didn't just create characters, she created a world. A quirky world - which made me love it even more. I love it when I can think of little details to include that add to that quirky world. Because as dark as things can get in this world, it can't be all bad when you have self-measuring tape measurers, platforms with the name 9 and 3/4, etc.

Now I have this image in my head of McG tanning on the lawn in one of those old fashioned swimsuits from like the 1890s! Look what you did to me! I will never be able to stop laughing!

I guess Ophelia thought the chicken went well with her flamingo hat?

I ended up having so much fun writing Ophelia. She's probably going to creep into this story more than she was meant to simply because she was so much fun to write! I'm so glad you liked her!

I'm so excited you like Sadie and this story! If I ever get the chance, I will try to snag another review so you can find out what happens!

Thanks again!

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Review #19, by alicia and anne Prologue

13th March 2015:
Now that is some awesome description at the beginning of this. It's set the tone very well and I am so intrigued.

Wow, especially as a woman is coming at her with a broom! I wonder why she's doing that and why the girl is hanging around outside the shop? Who is she waiting for? Awww she was waiting for food :( I wish that I could give her some!

I would be worried that I was still dreaming if a woman dressed like that came and woke me up!

Oh now this has gotten extremely interesting! Why isn't this girl on the street using a wand herself if she recognised one? Who is this cat/woman and what does she want? What happened to this girl to make her live on the street? So many questions asked and I want all of the answers, so I'm going to definitely keep reading your fabulous writing! :D I am so excited to find out more. I am so hooked already!

Author's Response: Awww! Thank you! I can't tell you how much I am blushing right now! I know what an amazing author you are, so a compliment like that from you totally has me feeling giddy.

I love this review! I love it when my writing makes people ask questions, and you are posting them right here for me to see, so I can follow your thought process as you read. That's so much fun! Thank you! And I do hope that after reading, especially if you sometime continue on, many of those questions will be answer.

(I do believe she might love for you to give her some food as well, but alas, that could be hard to manage.)

Thank you again! This review was such a treat. And I hope you enjoyed the read as well.

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Review #20, by The Ghost of Fred Future Chapter 3

9th January 2015:
Wow, so we finally get to hear (more) from Sadie! I'm not sure what I think of her yet. I will have to reserve judgment until I have gotten to know her a little better. Mostly I think it's because she's an OC, I don't have this default, built-in characterization to imagine. One thing that really impressed me was how much you conveyed with her thoughts, and I scarcely noticed in her interaction with Dumbledore that she didn't speak! Well done on that! I'm looking forward to seeing how she interacts with the Weasley Crew + Harry & Hermione.

As I said once before, I'm loving how you're incorporating McGonagall as a character in her own right! I thought you did pretty well with Dumbledore too. I definitely found some irony in his statement about there being people in the world who think they know what's best. That's certainly a way he behaved toward Harry! I guess Dumbledore knows better than a lot of people, in general, but still. :P

I'm not sure how intentional this was, but I liked the symbolism of Sadie looking at her "strange, new reflection in the mirror" at the end. I think it's indicative of the fact that she doesn't yet feel this transformation as quite real yet. For her, it's still something that's a reflection, or something not quite tangible. It's not just for her, really . . . it's for everyone. These changes are just on the outside, so the reflection shows that, but it's not quite reality yet. I hope I'm making sense here.

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Review #21, by The Ghost of Fred Future Chapter 2

9th January 2015:
Where to begin?! You're a great writer. Even though there are certain unlikely scenarios (as if the whole Harry Potter story isn't unlikely itself :P ) that seem to crop up regularly in fanfiction, a character with a mysterious past starting school late and/or being related to Harry being amongst them, I like the way you are handling this so far. It's not coming across like a poorly explained trope.

I like that instead of having a "special power," she's got a disability, and not one of those that just seems like one but is actually something super cool (though she's going to have to do all non-verbal spells, obviously). Also, it's a physical manifestation of the trauma she's been through . . . she's scarred like Harry, but in a different way. It's going to force you to tell her story through others as well, and I think it will result in keeping the mystery of her "lost years" and the circumstances regarding her family's deaths going for longer.

The high point of this chapter was characterization for sure, in my opinion. One advantage of fanfiction is that we have these readymade characters, so it's easy to make your readers recognize them from the get-go, which you've definitely done. I thought Harry, the twins, Ginny, and Hermione were particularly well done. They all seemed spot on. I can't wait to see how they interact with Sadie.

Oh, and it was fun to start seeing the connections with that shorter short story collection I read! Ha! I suspected Charlie was named after Charlie McLauchlin!

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Review #22, by The Ghost of Fred Present Chapter 1

7th January 2015:
I love love love that you've introduced McGonagall as a character! She's one of my favorite characters, actually, despite being a rather minor one, and it's rare to see her in a story except in the role of disapproving teacher when pranks are being played (usually in the Marauder era), it seems to me. I was so excited to see her presented here as a character in her own right, with some background (the reading and such) to develop her in this story a bit more. Very nice.

I'm a fan of the details about the long distance Floo as well! Something like that never occurred to me, despite its obvious parallel with long distance calling! The bit about putting Floo powder on the fire at exactly 2 and five eighths minutes was a detail that fit perfectly into the wizarding world JKR created too, what with the ridiculous monetary system they have and all (I mean, seriously, who has their seventeens times tables down pat? Wizards, I guess).

You've answered some of the questions from the prologue, but you've opened up more questions! We know who the girl is and why Ophelia was interested in her, but we still don't know her importance! Obviously there has been some sort of tragic event in the past. I imagine more details will be revealed as the story progresses.

Anyway, I think that McGonagall and Ophelia were my favorite parts of this chapter . . . I enjoyed them as characters.

Author's Response: I had a lot of fun writing McGonagall in this chapter. It was exciting to explore her character outside of being just a teacher. Besides, as a teacher myself, I can relate to her a lot and it's fun to show her with different sides.

I am also a big fan of details - and one of the things that made me love the books so much in the first place was this quirky, just a bit odd-ball world JKR created. It's so much fun to add to that! I'm glad you liked my little contribution!

Yup. More questions. This story will have a lot of them. And I hope readers like that approach.

Thanks again!

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Review #23, by The Ghost of Fred Present Prologue

6th January 2015:
Hey! It's your Secret Santa, finally getting around to the next batch of gifts! My apologies for my tardiness. I know you've got a bunch of reviews on this chapter already, but after the last story I read, I wanted to read this one, and of course I have to start at the beginning.

You are an ace at descriptive writing! You set a whole mood and atmosphere in this chapter. I could picture things so easily, and I felt like I could feel them too. You brought me right into the story like I was a fly on the wall. I just love it when writers manage to create an almost dreamy sense with their writing, in which I feel as if I am floating through it and/or the characters are floating through reality (for the record, your characters don't feel dreamy/floaty :P ).

So, who is this magical girl?! I assume that was a Muggle shop she was lurking outside. How does she know of magic? Is she a witch? Who is she looking for? I suspected the cat would turn out to be an Animagus, because it just seemed to parallel (though in a different universe, perhaps) McGonagall being a cat Animagus. I wonder who this girl is, though, that the woman has sought her out and is so interested in her.

There are quite a few questions raised in this prologue, which is great, since it entices the reader to keep going to find out the answers. Yet despite tantalizing us with unknown information, I don't feel like there's an obnoxious or poorly-written cliff-hanger, so kudos on that!

Ok, enough rambling. On to the next chapter.

Author's Response: No apologies needed! These reviews were wonderful and I completely understand about life getting busy! And I am thrilled about having you look at this story. It doesn't matter how many reviews a chapter has - a review from a friend always means that much more.

Aw. Thank you! I was trying so hard to set a mood, with the rain and mystery and lighting and everything. I'm really glad it worked!

:D Dreamy/floaty characters. Now I will have to try that sometime.

Yep, that was a Muggle shop she was outside of. But she is a bit of a different character - kinda stuck between two worlds.

And I was a bit obvious with the Animagus thing, but that was okay. The lady in question isn't very good at subtle anyway, so I guess it fits. And thinking of McGonagall isn't the worst comparison you could come up with *wink*.

I'm excited it left you with questions. That was pretty much the point, and if it hadn't worked, I would be sad.

Glad you liked it! And I love the rambling. :) Thanks again for reading!

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Review #24, by TidalDragon Chapter 9

18th December 2014:
Howdy! Sorry for the delay!

To jump right to what you've asked about, there certainly wasn't anything that came across to me as choppy or forced. There were a couple of uncharacteristic typos that could be indicative of the rushing you were worried about, but on the whole, solid.

One thing that did leap out about this chapter in comparison to some of the others was that it was particularly dialogue-heavy. Because of that I didn't get quite the same level of immersion that I have from previous chapters and I think it inhibited connecting with Sadie's reaction to her first Diagon Alley experiment. Obviously a lot of dialogue will happen from time-to-time, especially when your MC can't speak audibly and is somewhat at the mercy of a couple very talkative characters like Fred and George, but it felt like here wasn't the ideal opportunity for that.

What I enjoyed most about this chapter though was how you've continued to give us new looks at things that weren't covered in canon, all without violating it. Fred and George at Diagon Alley was fun to read and it was very interesting to see how early the twins had identified the building they ended up occupying with their store. Mrs. Weasley was also appropriately mother-hennish. Poor kids.

Hope this helps! Keep going!

Author's Response: No worries! You know how I work by now, so I am never concerned about delays.

Thank you so much for the honest review. :) I have noticed those typos as I've read back over it, and I really need to makes sure and do an edit promptly. I think you are right that I rushed a bit, being so happy to finally have something to post, and missed a few of them.

I'm not sure I can change the dialogue-heavy-ness of this chapter, but I really do see what you were meaning. I will have to be careful of that. I love dialogue and it comes easy for me to write usually, but I also think one of the strengths of this story is the feelings and descriptions, and I don't want to lose that. I really appreciate you pointing these things out.

I am trying VERY hard to stick to canon and not violate it, but still insert something new. :D Glad you noticed!

Thanks again. Your reviews and advice ALWAYS help.

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Review #25, by nott theodore Chapter 8

14th November 2014:
Hi, farmgirl! So I've been meaning to catch up with this story for ages, and I don't even know how I managed to miss an update from months ago (except I was completely snowed under at this point with uni work). And you commented on my status, so here's some NaNo encouragement too! :D

I really loved the way that you opened this chapter, throwing us right into the chaos that's just a normal meal in the Weasley household. I loved the mention of George elbowing Ginny, both of their retorts, and the way that Ginny had already wised up by this age and was more likely to plan revenge than go telling tales to their parents. I feel like it's the sort of thing that she'd have to do to survive in a family like that, and Fred and George have always seemed pretty proud of the way she grew up and know she's a formidable foe!

I really felt for poor Sadie in the midst of this. It was also lovely that George was the one to notice her - I think that the twins can both be really perceptive when they want to be, but they're often not written that way, so to me it makes sense that they would pick up on something like Sadie not having the food that she needs, because she's too scared to get involved. I smiled when he made sure that Sadie managed to get some food and helped her to combat all the noise without drawing any attention to the fact that she was the one needing more food. It was very sweet and tactful of him!

I've said this in most of my reviews, but you really write the Weasleys - especially the twins - so well! I also really liked seeing the hint of maturity that's often forgotten when people write the twins, as George mused on the unfairness of the different situations.

As for him jumping up and leaving partway through dinner - I'm not entirely sure that Molly would allow it, but I am curious about why he left and took Fred with him! I know that their family suspected that it had something to do with their pranks and joke products, but I wonder if it wasn't something that George thought of that they could use to help Sadie...

Ah, Arthur. He's another character that you write wonderfully and I really liked the way that he was more accepting of the fact that the boys are determined to make mischief and that they want to open the joke shop - he always seemed happier with the idea than Molly, anyway.

The two flashbacks in the final section of this chapter were so contrasting that it really had a big impact. It was so sweet to see the interaction between Sadie and her father, and the happy family life that they had. Sadie's just so cute there, all innocent and untouched by what would happen to her later, and I loved her enthusiasm about playing with the Snow Blower. I think that just made it even sadder to think of what happened to her family, though.

Arthur's conversation with Sadie was really sweet, too. He's so caring and I liked the link between him and Sadie's father with their shared love of Muggle objects. (I did notice a few typos in this section, one of them where you write 'Brittan' and I think you mean 'Britain', so it might be worth giving this a quick read through to catch those.) I'm glad that Arthur knows that Charlie found the farm that he was looking for, in the end.

I certainly wasn't expecting Arthur mentioning a wand to Sadie to have such a violent reaction! I'm guessing that the flashback we got to see there is what Sadie has experienced at the hands of wizards and part of the reason she doesn't speak... it's so sad to think about what she's been through! But I, like George, am really worried about how she'll cope at Hogwarts, if even the thought of a magic wand causes such a terrible memory - how will she survive being completely surrounded by magic?

This was another great chapter and hopefully I'll be back soon to get to the other one that I hadn't even noticed you'd posted! And as for NaNo - good luck, and you can do it!

Sian :)

Author's Response: I am so awful, waiting this long to reply to such an amazing review. I really hope you don't hate me!

Anyway, on to the response.

You know I love the Weasleys. And one of the things that I love about them so much is that they are so normal! Their house is messy, there is chaos everywhere, siblings tease each other but still love each other - it's not perfect, but that's okay. So I jump at any chance I get to write all of that.

Ginny is a smart girl. She figured out a long time ago that the best way to get Fred and George was at their own game. And you are right - they end up pretty proud of her for it.

While I love the chaos, I think poor Sadie is a bit intimidated by it right now. So I did let George play the hero this one time and help her out. I'm glad you liked the way I did it, because I really didn't want to make Sadie seem TOO helpless.

I never really thought of Molly not allowing him to leave half-way through dinner. I guess I just figured with all the craziness, she might not even notice.

The twins ARE up to something, and you are a smart girl, so I believe you are on the right track. Hold onto those thoughts.

Thank you so much for your compliments about Arthur. I do love writing him and I'm glad you are enjoying my portrayal of him. As well as the flashback to Sadie's dad. I really wanted to show that not all of her memories are awful - some are very sweet if sad. For the first nine years of her life her childhood was really very lovely.

Stupid typos. I really, really wish I could spot all of those before I post.

You guessed right about the last flashback. Magic has not always been kind to Sadie, especially when wands have been pointed at her. But, she has people who care about her now and will help her learn to get over it. But I suppose it will take time.

Thank you so much for the review, and for being patient as I got around to replying. You are a great friend and I always treasure your reviews. Hope life slows down for you soon!

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